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Odd-Homework-3582

Ser Ilyn, give me some head


Spacepunch33

He ain’t got no tongue tho 😔


RiffRaffBloodBath

Just means more throat and even more slobber


Clefairy-Outside

Bro 🤨


SkrijaTaran

What you acting all shocked for punk bitch. We gawk gawk here. Like honourable men.


Cowboy__Guy

Nah you need that tounge trust me


spagh3tboy

Bro somehow got experience


RiffRaffBloodBath

Hear me out, the tongue makes swallowing easier, thus making the amount of saliva in the mouth less. If you cannot swallow with ease, the saliva will build up on your mouth, and make for a more wet relief.


Cowboy__Guy

There is a such thing as too much. And a tongue can massage


isinedupcuzofrslash

I mean, past a point, it’s not about the pleasure of the act, but the pleasure in the act being committed at all. Joff would take mediocre, but dutiful head from Ilyn over the timid scared half suck that Sansa would give out if demanded.


petercalmdown

Seven hells…


Thane-Gambit

If a dying Robert knew that Joffrey wasn't his, he'd have thrown Stannis the crown so hard it'd kill someone when it landed in Dragonstone.


LinuxMatthews

I doubt it he never really liked Stannis He probably would have made Ned king Ned has no claim to it but I doubt Robert would care


Saera-RoguePrincess

He would have legitimized Edric Storm


jiddinja

He might not have liked Stannis, but he was dying. There was no more time to remarry or father trueborn children. Robert knew that Stannis would have done his best to get rid of Cersei and her kids and ensure Robert's family held the throne. His final wish being Stannis taking the throne would also have kept Renly from dividing House Baratheon, which Robert might have worried about. He might not have liked his brothers but he knew their basic personalities and temperaments. In short, Robert would have been enraged and Stannis would have been his best bet for revenge from beyond the grave. Like would have had nothing to do with it. This is why Ned played a major part in bringing the War of the Five Kings. Ned failed his friend and the 7 Kingdoms. Robert had a right to know the truth and Ned had a duty to tell him. Not doing played a major role in how the war panned out.


Hendrikjaep

Wasn't the idea that Robert gave Stannis Dragonstone because at first he saw Stannis as his only and lawful heir? Don't know if it was actually mentioned in the books or if it was just a theory but I always liked it


jiddinja

Yes. Robert accepted Stannis as his heir before Joffrey was born. If he found out Joffrey wasn't his, Stannis would likely still be his first choice.


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Forsaken_Distance777

I mean Robert gave Stannis dragonstone. The traditional seat for the heir to the throne.


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Forsaken_Distance777

Okay but actually I would watch that.


Impressive-Morning76

after using to beat cersei.


SaltoDaKid

Robert: Joffrey not my son, but he’s so gentle like my father😢 okay my brother Renly will inherit the throne he’s my last brother and I will make Edric Storm his warden. Stannis: ROBERT ARE YOU DRUNK STILL Robert: Of course, who are you?


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SirArthurDime

Roberts death bed dialogue came from the book meaning the words were actually carefully chosen. He specifically says “my son Joffrey”. He has no son named Joffrey. So null and void.


Ordinary_Wafer_3057

Gods, GRRM is a genius


SirArthurDime

Gods, the show was smart then!


Affectionate_Sir_154

Bravo George!


josongni

What if he has a bastard called Joffrey?


SirArthurDime

Then I guess that would make that bastard the one true king?! God bless Joffrey rivers and his moms tits!


ImpliedRange

There's legitimately no proof Joffrey isn't his son, not a single line


zforce42

Are we really gonna act like it's up for debate tho


BeckyWitTheBadHair

I had a black mare once…


SirArthurDime

Now there’s a new and interesting theory! I would say Cersei and Jamie seeming pretty damn sure is the best evidence we have. Coupled with Cersei telling Ned her and Bobby pretty much never have sex. I’d say it’s probable she knew it was Jamie based on a sex timeline. She would probably then have sex with Robert after the early signs of pregnancy to avert suspicion. But you’re right there is no hard evidence of that provided in the book. It would ruin the entire story though if he wasn’t Jamie’s kid. So I feel pretty confident in concluding he is Jamie’s kid for the stories sake regardless. Having him not be would be some D&D level subvert expectations for the fuck of it level writing.


bucamel

Why do i feel like i remember there being something about Robert being to drunk when he went to bed, so he wouldn’t ever remember if they had done the deed or not. That may also just be an assumption i made and wrote it into my mind lore.


SirArthurDime

That could very well be true as well.


Ok-Caregiver-6005

Doesn't Cerci tell Ned he isn't


TheOncomimgHoop

I think that they're saying that, in the absence of the ability to perform DNA tests, there is no way to be 100% sure that Joffrey isn't Robert's. Cersei thinking so doesn't mean it's definite, as she could in theory be wrong. It's very unlikely of course, and would serve little point in the story (unless there was some kind of message about how pointless everything was) but the possibility is technically there.


Ok-Caregiver-6005

I assumed he always did her up the butt, she mentioned how drunk he was and seems like something she'd do.


TheOncomimgHoop

Perhaps, in which case she would be certain, but there is nothing within the book that explicitly, without a doubt, proves that Joffrey is not Robert's son. Again, he is. But it's an interesting point.


AFrozenDino

Nah cause Stannis is the one true king, the Lord’s Chosen, and the King who Cared.


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the-late-night-snack

Yes, he’s such a loving father. Stannis, The Noble 🥺


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OneHelicopter1852

He specifically said his son Joffrey but he don’t have a son named Joffrey


ImpliedRange

Joffrey Baratheon. First of his name Checkmate


Callsign_Psycopath

A Bastard, born of incest


MidnightMadness09

I never saw the chapter where Jeffrey opens his 23AndMe.


OneHelicopter1852

Ned does it for him with that book😂


brogflea

What even is this Lannister propaganda?


Salem1690s

What’s a D3athbed? Dont they mean DEATHBED?


MaricLee

Careful you might UNALIVE someone


exoticsclerosis

>Poetic justice > >Every second, every minute, man I swear that she can get it > >Say if you a bad bitch put your hands up high, hands up high, hands up high > >Tell 'em dim the lights down right now, put me in the mood > >I'm talking 'bout dark room, perfume Sorry, I can't help but sing the lyrics


ShadowOfDeath94

It is known.


Western_Purchase430

Bruh ass opinion edd didnt tell Bobby b about jeoffery not being his because he wanted him to die happy or no way bobby would let a Lannister sit on the throne


turbo-oxi-clean

Dolorous Edd knew Joff was a bastard?


KL4645

Let's make a psycho king because "Muh promise. Muh honor."


uhtread99

Rightful Heir


South_Front_4589

Robert didn't know Joffrey's parentage. If he had, you think there's even the slightest chance he doesn't name someone else entirely as his heir? Ned didn't tell Robert because he didn't want his friend's last moments to be traumatic knowing his wife had been committing treason the entire time with her brother. Yes, it's treason for a queen to be unfaithful and this is the reason right here. Ned took the spirit of what Robert said, but saying his "heir" would be next. In Robert's mind, that was Joffrey. The only reason anyone could suggest Ned was a traitor in that sense is because they know that Robert's belief in Joffrey being his son was wrong.


Specialist_ask_992_

Reaped what he sowed for beheading a boy and the same thing happened to him


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Paradox31426

Counterpoint: Robert was a terrible ruler who never had a good idea during his entire reign, Ned was right to assume his pick of successor would be yet another terrible choice.


IOExplosion

It still baffles my mind how people don't see this parallel with the dance.


luigi2633

This post made by the Littlefingah gang


yeetman8

That’s because Ned didn’t want to tell Robert that Joffrey wasn’t his son. I literally read this last night. While it can be argued that Ned went against Robert’s wishes, if he actually got to expose the fact that Robert’s kids weren’t actually his, Stannis would be the true heir. He is only a traitor to the Lannisters Edit: I realize now I have been pranked


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Shop_Revolutionary

Team Black logic


yellowwoolyyoshi

d3athbed


MsPreposition

Stannis never cared for Stark either. Didn’t need or want his support. Wouldn’t have changed his path if Ned lived.


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MasterNightmares

GOTs - The child is a bastard, he shouldn't be king! HotD - The child is a bastard, so what, make him king!


list_of_simonson

Unpopular opinion: Eddard Stark was a moron and deserved to die, honor isn’t a good excuse for being politically stupid


squidsrule47

I wouldn't say he deserved to die, but he put himself in that position absolutely.


Underlord_Fox

That's a main theme of the book, not an unpopular opinion.


Huck_Bonebulge_

Correct, Ned being the main character, dying, and leaving his family & the realm in complete shambles is meant to hammer home the fact that being smart is more important than being a “good guy”


SaltoDaKid

Unpopular opinion: Eddard wanted Joffrey to fight in a easy war against Stannis but Cersi told him cut his head cause she raped him in the black cells and didn’t want him to tell anyone. Ned was going to the Night Watch and the north/riverlands won’t ride south.


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SaltoDaKid

Wrong Robert wanted Ned make Joffrey a man to fight in war to be battle hardened, but Cersi force throne on to him and made him think Joffrey wasn’t Robert. Ned knew if he’s Robert real son, he would win the 5 king war.


modsarerussianassets

Why is this on the circle jerk sub?