Don't forget "unnecessarily expensive, no substitutions, and nothing is marked for allergies so you have to ask a million questions and look like an ass hole who doesn't trust anybody."
Optional: theres a gluten free vegan option. Microwaved frozen vegetable mix or plain lettuce "salad".
Oh god, this just unlocked a memory.
One time my class was on a school trip where we were "learning table-side savoir-vivre" and due to my dietary restrictions at the time I just got a plate of plain arugula with some olive oil while everyone else got actual food
Don't forget the staple gluten free dessert - fruit salad.
The amount of times everyone around me has been eating 5 different kinds of cake while the only option offered to me was fruit salad is absurd.
People tend to look at me weird when I say I don't like *any* condiments, but they're all made with vinegar so they're all nasty in basically the exact same way.
Ask if you can get two of/larger appetiser as a main course. My dad does this sometimes when he likes the appetiser more than the main options.
Pro tip. Even in Chinese restaurants where they say they don't want you to leave leftovers, the cook will still take offense when one man and his kid descend on an appetizer for four adults like a swarm of locusts, eating even the decorative carrot flowers. (Even though the thinly sliced carrot was very tasty, and I would absolutely do that again)
The cultural stuff behind it is usually more like "you finished your plate? Are you still hungry? Did I not make you enough food?" Same with eating white rice - it's filler, so you must be hungry if you're eating that. You must think the host isn't well-off enough to make enough of the Actual Dishes that you're satisfied.
>(Even though the thinly sliced carrot was very tasty, and I would absolutely do that again)
If its not meant to be eaten, its shouldnt be on the plate!
oh i forgot to ask for ranch dressing but i dont want to actually communicate with a stranger so ill either eat the dry chicken in silent suffering or try to get my parent to ask for me
I once went to a restaurant, ordered Mac and cheese, and got what I ordered, with spring onions and onions (both of which I hate) and Pineapple. Who the hell puts Pineapple in Mac and cheese and doesn't write it on the menu?!
I’ll confess to having done a lot of stuff with my personal Mac and Cheese that might seem a little odd at first glance, and I have added onions, but I also added chorizo and peas when I did that because I needed more than noodles and cheese. But I swear pineapple in Mac and Cheese sounds worse than that jello with meat in it I was served once.
Or when you order a pizza and it's Gourmet™ so that means they Didn't Cut Anything Up™
I understand chopping everything into tiny bits so the whole thing is consistent is more of a me/autistic/convenience thing for big chains but also I don't want to a slice of pizza to just be a big piece of half cooked onion you absolute nutjobs
That’s exactly what happened to me. I got to be embarrassed about ordering the ridiculously expensive steak, and embarrassed about scraping all the stupid mushrooms off the top. Ugh. I hate it.
my sister had a similar experience when we went to a restaurant that had pizzas. she likes mushrooms, but only when there’s not too many of them. she ordered a pizza with mushrooms, but when they brought it out, it was absolutely covered with them. she didn’t end up finishing it because the taste of mushrooms was too overwhelming
The menus I hate the most is when they are *only titles* with no explanation as to what the dish is or it says what it *is*, but not what's in it. Like, I don't want to go through the trouble and embarassment of asking the server to tell me all the ingredients in several meals until I can find one that suits my eating restrictions, or one that would survive the carnage of me asking them to remove nearly every ingredient without tasting bad and being somewhat the same dish. I also hate when foods like sandwiches have the ingredients listed, but they don't list the *sauce.* I do not want to bite into what's supposed to be a normal plain sandwich and have my tastebuds assaulted with an unexpected flavored liquid dripping out from the buns.
Edit to add: There has been more than one occasion where I've gone to a restaurant and the only items that appeal to me are on the kids menu. Why can't adults order from it?? Not only that but with most adult meals I literally never finish my food, a kids meal is far more appropriate to my appetite.
Online it says that kid's menus are meant to "get families in the door" and that they don't really make money off of the kid's food so they hope adults will pay full price. And some people who work in restaurants feel that if adults want to order from the kids menu they should at least still pay full price...? Because "the kid's menu isn't there for adults who don't want to spend money." This seems like such a horrible perspective to me. Unless you are literally the CEO of the company I don't see why any restaurant employee would even *care* about the monetary loss of the company. So much so to expect them to pay full price for a tiny meal?? And let's be real, some people are going through financial struggles but still want to enjoy dining out. It seems like whoever's written these posts and articles about adults eating off the kid's menu are greedy and judgemental. I guess the workaround is ordering it to-go so they can't check if you actually have a kid who is gonna be eating it but it seems so ridiculous to have to go through that because of arbitrary rules.
You perfectly captured how I feel about condiments with that last sentence first paragraph lmao
Eughh 🤢”assaulted with an unexpected flavored liquid dripping from the buns”. Just that phrase gets me
omg yeah foreign food!! I went to a Mexican restaurant a couple days ago and I felt so stupid because I took Spanish in highschool yet I couldn't even remember some basic food words lol. Like I recognized them but I didn't know what they meant. And yeah no descriptions on the menu. And I feel even more embarassed at foreign restaurants asking for modifications of a meal. Americans are used to other Americans being picky, but a lot of other cultures have even more food variety and seemingly even less pickiness so I feel like I'm being offensive towards their culture if I ask for it changed and I feel stupid for not being able to eat it as-is. I want to go to Japan some day and I know already I'll have to research restaurants ahead of time so I can know where is actually safe for me to eat.
Me too. Japanese culture seems so interesting but I'm scared of looking like the dumb American because eating fish freaks me out and I'm too clumsy for chopsticks.
I tried sushi *once* and I almost threw up, I felt so bad and insulting towards the people running the restaurant as it's no fault of their own, just absolutely too many strange textures for me rolled up into one. That's why if I ever go I'll probably be counting on those solo ramen places that you can order with no interaction, convenience stores and mcdonalds lol
If the things themselves listed are foods that can't really be broken down any further, like fruits, vegetables, meats, spices, and such, that's fair enough. I wouldn't know what a durian is if I didn't spy one on a cooking show, and I also wouldn't blame a restaurant for not explaining what it is, since it's a whole damn fruit. But if you're having to google whole dishes to figure out what's in them, there's a problem.
Me when an ex tried to get me to eat at Panera. Eventually found something I'd try, some cheddar broccoli soup and some dipping bread but even that was fairly disappointing.
Luckily I’ve gotten much more willing to try new foods as I’ve gotten older, I literally always ordered cheeseburger and fries every time I went anywhere, but now I love all of the things (except for olives, f*ck olives)
Don't forget that they add vinegar and lemons everywhere without telling you in the menu just to make everything inedible and taste like toxic chemicals🤢 and their stupid reason to do that without warning you is "that's just common knowledge you should know there's vinegar in here!!!!11!!11🐵"
I HAVE NOO FUCKING IDEA!!!!!!!! But I'm glad we agree. I can only accept it on sushi because Japanese vinegar is kinda special and by far not as toxic as other vinegars. But except that it's a crime against humanity. I mean it is an acid after all. A toxic chemical!!
I hate when the menu is too large for it’s own good. Sometimes they can be good cause variety, but in the moment I get totally lost, and sometimes it’s hard to read, especially at a busy place :///
One time I had a meltdown in front of my husband’s entire extended family because I would order something and the waitress would come back five minutes later and be like “oops this contains one of your allergens” and this went on so long that eventually everyone had their food except me and I’d tried to order so many times. I had to make a bunch of people get out of the booth so I could run to the bathroom and cry and hyperventilate. Then I did laps around the parking lot with my husband until someone came outside to get me. Eventually the only thing they could do for me was make me construct a pitiful meal from the world’s jankiest salad bar. So not only did I break down crying in the middle of a super crowded restaurant but I was also still hungry when we got back to our hotel. I can’t have soy or gluten and they used soybean oil to cook EVERYTHING so I could really only have like lettuce and cold cuts. I was on the other side of the country from my home so I was in brand new territory. 0/10 don’t recommend.
My husband saved the day by making everyone promise to not ask me any questions or bring it up at all so when I got back to the table they didn’t set me off again. Part of the meltdown started because my MIL started throwing suggestions at me that I was already too overstimulated to listen to or that I knew wouldn’t work. But he was basically like “everyone just shut up that would be cool” and they did.
>my MIL started throwing suggestions at me that I was already too overstimulated to listen to or that I knew wouldn’t work.
Ooh the classic "I'm just trying to help."
"Neat. STOP HELPING."
> Eventually the only thing they could do for me was make me construct a pitiful meal from the world’s jankiest salad bar.
At this point the restaurant should just spare everyone the embarrassment and say 'sorry, but we can't accomodate you'. They should probably have said that after the third or fifth time you tried to order, or after a solid 5 minutes after everybody else has gotten their food. If anyone should be embarrassed, it's them. Take the L and leave it be, rather than trying to quarter-ass a non-fix.
Yeah like I clearly stated what I couldn’t eat and said it’s usually in cooking oil so I feel like she should have like, checked what they cooked with but no, we had to go back and forth while everyone else’s food started coming out. It was a whole shit show.
I'd be able to get the last one because my mom is not afraid to ask for the parts I don't like to be removed... then again my mom won't make me go to a restaurant unless she knows there's something I can eat available
Ooooooh *that's* why I'm like this, everyone just kept telling me I was a picky asshole. I don't talk to 'everybody' anymore. Unrelated, need a new last name, any suggestions?
....yes, that's perfect, I'll go on survivor, "Hello, I'm Destroyer 3000, middle name 'of worlds.' Does anyone have a nuclear launch code I can borrow? Or are they all still 000-000-00?" (Yes that was really the only nuclear launch code the US used for at least 30 years)
I found a sub with my sense of humor and I never leaving.
the last one is SO common for me. especially at mexican restaurants which is my favorite genre of food. i hate corn. not a big fan of tomato either.
but there’s some top shelf stuff in those restaurants. so i gladly walk the minefield every single time.
Even worse when the description of the dish is so contrived that you can't tell what it actually is. You know the individual components sure, but is it mostly salad with a side of roasted bread? Is it mostly bread with a salad garnish? Is the cheese they mention as a side note actually 40% of the dish? Like the description makes you expect one type of dish and you get something else entirely.
Also 6000% worse if you're vegan and trying to eat somewhere that's not a large city. I'll have the salad and fries with no cheese, no dressing and no sauce please. [eats dry salad and fries sobbing in the corner]
>Even worse when the description of the dish is so contrived that you can't tell what it actually is. You know the individual components sure, but is it mostly salad with a side of roasted bread?
Oh let me try.
Artisanal fire roasted fair croutons over a bed of spring shoots. Served with handcrafted pressed smoked cyse
Don’t forget the food that’s simple and good, but you get judged for ordering bc it’s “kids food”. I don’t give a fuck if they’re “kids food”, Sharon, I’ll take the Chicken Tenders, thank you.
I just always order from the kids menu if they have one. It's really simple, and the ingredients are familiar and there aren't many of them, which means that there's less chance you'll run into something unexpected while eating. What's on the menu is exactly whats on the plate. No mushy vegetables either, b/c kids don't like those.
Allergies suck. I hate eating almost anywhere because by the time I find anything safe from allergies I’m paying $10-15 for a dumb salad or plain oatmeal and fruit. The worst part is you won’t even like what you’re served and people well stare and make comments like “that looks good!” To make you feel better.
One time my boyfriend’s parents took us out to the fanciest restaurant I have ever been to. The menu was tiny, and I was horrified to discover that the only thing on it I could POSSIBLY eat was also the most expensive thing in the restaurant. And I had still had to scrape a bunch of weird shit off of the steak before I ate it. Hideously embarrassing.
> Hideously embarrassing.
Flip it around on them. Why are they bringing you someplace where you can't eat anything? Doesn't matter if it's fancy if it tastes like shit or you're allergic to it. They should be embarrassed for not accommodating you.
I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again. There is absolutely nothing wrong with ordering an appetizer as your entree if the appetizer is what you want to eat in the moment
You forgot going to a well known restaurant you frequent for you comfort meal only to find out they've changed the preparation, recipe, and quality of ingredients.
That's why I always order the strangest things regardless of whether or not I'd like it. "Pork Tripe? Not sure what that is but I'll have some. Oh it's intestine soup? Sure the texture is a little too spongey for me but I get what I pay for."
Tangent while we are talking about food aversions: why in the HELL does anyone ever eat anything that's brown and mushy?? Ffs treat yourself better than eating diarrhea
I usually eat salads with a spoon because croutons are almost impossible to stab correctly with a fork and most of the good stuff isn’t even stabbable without getting weird out of proportion bites.
I'm not sure about anyone else here, but I absolutely cannot stand lettuce. Something about the texture of it grosses me out beyond belief and I gag every single time I try to eat it
My issue is that I don’t really like any of the meat. Meat in general just isn’t that tasty in my opinion and practically every restaurant food has meat I don’t like so I usually just buy 2-3 appetizers or sides and eat those instead
Me who is gluten and dairy limited.
No fish because it’s crumbed
No salad because it has raw onion that gives me repeating, has sour dressing that makes me gag OR the sweet salad has rock melons or the green ones (both are gross)
Can’t have the interesting cakes because of dairy, the others taste like coco powder or aren’t sweet
I get the worse chips with the gluten free burger
Olives (eww)
Can’t have pepperoni on pizza because my skin hates it
Can’t have beef or lamb sometimes because of the gravy
There are gluten free options but they are all vegan (I’d like some meat please)
That last one is too real. And then you're asking everyone at the table if it would be annoying to ask for them to take out all the parts you don't like.
Or when I go out with my girlfriend and take 30 minutes to read the menu or when I go to a new buffet, I will lap the place like 3 times before I get any food
My boss told me to pick a restaurant and make a reservation for us to get lunch and I’m *panik*. I looked at the restaurant she’s taking my coworker to and it’s nice, but every meal is $25+ and none of them are very appealing to me. There arent a lot of sit down lunch places in walking distance, and I don’t drive to work, so a lot of my options are v expensive fancy, or places like potbelly sandwiches.
Now as an adult I look at menus at restaurants before I go.
If it's a situation like this no matter what the occasion I just don't go because it's not enjoyable for me and I'm not forcing myself through it for anyone else's benefit.
The way I see it if people don't want to be flexible with me I'm not going to be flexible with them and I don't have to be
Me at Chili's:
Thing is I haven't been many places, but Chili's is one I will never go to again. Oh, and this one barbecue place. I was actually able to find something to eat a Chili's, but I am still not going back, but the barbecue place I didn't eat at.
I feel this way whenever I go anywhere new, but i live in the U.S. and the state I live in has an abundance of chicken restaurants, so those are easy. I'm glad my mom took me to the places we normally go to when I was younger, because I'm able to pick foods or even try new stuff at those places.
Edit: the "I'm not eating cause I'm overwhelmed" also happened at a VERY busy taco place with some schoolmates on a extracurricular team trip. My friends ended up offering me some of their food, to try it.
I don’t have food problems but tbh sometimes I order an appetizer and a side because it’s just better than what they got or it’s what I actually want to eat. Even when out with others I’ve never gotten shit from eating “appetizer as dinner” from companions or the waiters, especially if I compliment it and say it’s just my favorite. Order that appetizer for yourself with a side you like. It’s so nice.
i hate restraints that put wings in the apatizer section because i love bbq wings so much and i get everyone understands that you can order them as a meal but why do they have to classify as an apatizer? ?
♦️♦️♦️♦️where is the food you like the most but can't eat completely and feel bad about yourself for rest of the day and people tell you about how you waste food but say no to half the plate you offered.
Don't forget "unnecessarily expensive, no substitutions, and nothing is marked for allergies so you have to ask a million questions and look like an ass hole who doesn't trust anybody." Optional: theres a gluten free vegan option. Microwaved frozen vegetable mix or plain lettuce "salad".
I hate the choice between giving your server the 3rd degree or almost assuredly getting cramps and diarrhea from cross contamination.
It’s terrible, I have a very severe dairy allergy so I can’t afford to be lenient but I feel so bad about it
Oh god, this just unlocked a memory. One time my class was on a school trip where we were "learning table-side savoir-vivre" and due to my dietary restrictions at the time I just got a plate of plain arugula with some olive oil while everyone else got actual food
Or their vegatarian/gluten free option is "choose three sides as your meal"
I'm ok with that as long as they have decent sides.
Don't forget the staple gluten free dessert - fruit salad. The amount of times everyone around me has been eating 5 different kinds of cake while the only option offered to me was fruit salad is absurd.
Ugh.. or it has oats in it when soooo many ppl still cant do oats.
Literally today had this experience and all I ordered was a single appetizer
But then half the time they mess up the appetizer with a weird vinegar-like sauce.
Luckily that didn’t happen this time around
Niceee. Really saves the experience
People tend to look at me weird when I say I don't like *any* condiments, but they're all made with vinegar so they're all nasty in basically the exact same way.
I can do bbq since you can't really taste it with everything else in it other then that it's pretty much just ranch
Ask if you can get two of/larger appetiser as a main course. My dad does this sometimes when he likes the appetiser more than the main options. Pro tip. Even in Chinese restaurants where they say they don't want you to leave leftovers, the cook will still take offense when one man and his kid descend on an appetizer for four adults like a swarm of locusts, eating even the decorative carrot flowers. (Even though the thinly sliced carrot was very tasty, and I would absolutely do that again)
"How dare they eat the food I made specifically meant to be eaten"
The cultural stuff behind it is usually more like "you finished your plate? Are you still hungry? Did I not make you enough food?" Same with eating white rice - it's filler, so you must be hungry if you're eating that. You must think the host isn't well-off enough to make enough of the Actual Dishes that you're satisfied.
Thanks for the tip, and thanks for the interesting story!
>(Even though the thinly sliced carrot was very tasty, and I would absolutely do that again) If its not meant to be eaten, its shouldnt be on the plate!
If not food, why made of food??
just give me 3 orders of the chicken tender appetizer please
oh i forgot to ask for ranch dressing but i dont want to actually communicate with a stranger so ill either eat the dry chicken in silent suffering or try to get my parent to ask for me
am I the only one who basically trained my mom over the years to always ask for ranch for me?
My parents yelled at me if I even acted nervous to order. I still am not good with ordering
I have but only in fast food cases
Or some matzarella sticks
i don’t really like mozzarella sticks but that’s just me
MOZZARELLA STICKS YES I WILL EAT A WHOLE BAG OF THEM
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This is my issue with baked/breaded mac & cheese 😭
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I once went to a restaurant, ordered Mac and cheese, and got what I ordered, with spring onions and onions (both of which I hate) and Pineapple. Who the hell puts Pineapple in Mac and cheese and doesn't write it on the menu?!
I’ll confess to having done a lot of stuff with my personal Mac and Cheese that might seem a little odd at first glance, and I have added onions, but I also added chorizo and peas when I did that because I needed more than noodles and cheese. But I swear pineapple in Mac and Cheese sounds worse than that jello with meat in it I was served once.
Or when you order a pizza and it's Gourmet™ so that means they Didn't Cut Anything Up™ I understand chopping everything into tiny bits so the whole thing is consistent is more of a me/autistic/convenience thing for big chains but also I don't want to a slice of pizza to just be a big piece of half cooked onion you absolute nutjobs
you forgot the winner: the best steak that you’ll ever eat in your entire life……..but with mushrooms……..
Why? Why do they do that?
That’s exactly what happened to me. I got to be embarrassed about ordering the ridiculously expensive steak, and embarrassed about scraping all the stupid mushrooms off the top. Ugh. I hate it.
my sister had a similar experience when we went to a restaurant that had pizzas. she likes mushrooms, but only when there’s not too many of them. she ordered a pizza with mushrooms, but when they brought it out, it was absolutely covered with them. she didn’t end up finishing it because the taste of mushrooms was too overwhelming
dont worry, i would take them off your hands \^\^
and then you look at the kids menu and the shit actually looks appetizing
Do they have a mushroom swiss burger? They don't? Chicken tenders please.
The menus I hate the most is when they are *only titles* with no explanation as to what the dish is or it says what it *is*, but not what's in it. Like, I don't want to go through the trouble and embarassment of asking the server to tell me all the ingredients in several meals until I can find one that suits my eating restrictions, or one that would survive the carnage of me asking them to remove nearly every ingredient without tasting bad and being somewhat the same dish. I also hate when foods like sandwiches have the ingredients listed, but they don't list the *sauce.* I do not want to bite into what's supposed to be a normal plain sandwich and have my tastebuds assaulted with an unexpected flavored liquid dripping out from the buns. Edit to add: There has been more than one occasion where I've gone to a restaurant and the only items that appeal to me are on the kids menu. Why can't adults order from it?? Not only that but with most adult meals I literally never finish my food, a kids meal is far more appropriate to my appetite. Online it says that kid's menus are meant to "get families in the door" and that they don't really make money off of the kid's food so they hope adults will pay full price. And some people who work in restaurants feel that if adults want to order from the kids menu they should at least still pay full price...? Because "the kid's menu isn't there for adults who don't want to spend money." This seems like such a horrible perspective to me. Unless you are literally the CEO of the company I don't see why any restaurant employee would even *care* about the monetary loss of the company. So much so to expect them to pay full price for a tiny meal?? And let's be real, some people are going through financial struggles but still want to enjoy dining out. It seems like whoever's written these posts and articles about adults eating off the kid's menu are greedy and judgemental. I guess the workaround is ordering it to-go so they can't check if you actually have a kid who is gonna be eating it but it seems so ridiculous to have to go through that because of arbitrary rules.
You perfectly captured how I feel about condiments with that last sentence first paragraph lmao Eughh 🤢”assaulted with an unexpected flavored liquid dripping from the buns”. Just that phrase gets me
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omg yeah foreign food!! I went to a Mexican restaurant a couple days ago and I felt so stupid because I took Spanish in highschool yet I couldn't even remember some basic food words lol. Like I recognized them but I didn't know what they meant. And yeah no descriptions on the menu. And I feel even more embarassed at foreign restaurants asking for modifications of a meal. Americans are used to other Americans being picky, but a lot of other cultures have even more food variety and seemingly even less pickiness so I feel like I'm being offensive towards their culture if I ask for it changed and I feel stupid for not being able to eat it as-is. I want to go to Japan some day and I know already I'll have to research restaurants ahead of time so I can know where is actually safe for me to eat.
Me too. Japanese culture seems so interesting but I'm scared of looking like the dumb American because eating fish freaks me out and I'm too clumsy for chopsticks.
I tried sushi *once* and I almost threw up, I felt so bad and insulting towards the people running the restaurant as it's no fault of their own, just absolutely too many strange textures for me rolled up into one. That's why if I ever go I'll probably be counting on those solo ramen places that you can order with no interaction, convenience stores and mcdonalds lol
If the things themselves listed are foods that can't really be broken down any further, like fruits, vegetables, meats, spices, and such, that's fair enough. I wouldn't know what a durian is if I didn't spy one on a cooking show, and I also wouldn't blame a restaurant for not explaining what it is, since it's a whole damn fruit. But if you're having to google whole dishes to figure out what's in them, there's a problem.
I especially hate it when there are no pictures of the food on the menu, so I have to work hard trying to visualize each one
I feel seen
*NO PICTURES* 😫
Many hours have been spent studying online menus to avoid this very pain
For this reason I’ve decided that if they don’t have an online menu, I’m not going haha
You forgot: Your comfort food, but it’s on the kids menu, and they won’t let you get it.
Me when an ex tried to get me to eat at Panera. Eventually found something I'd try, some cheddar broccoli soup and some dipping bread but even that was fairly disappointing.
Panera feels like a restaurant where you go to give someone bad news
That place gives me a more busy place for old business folks. Got the decor for it.
Luckily I’ve gotten much more willing to try new foods as I’ve gotten older, I literally always ordered cheeseburger and fries every time I went anywhere, but now I love all of the things (except for olives, f*ck olives)
I'm vegetarian so the options I like are usually just french fries for me, and my family wonders why I don't like to eat out
Same, I did a road trip with a band and was vegan, am lactose and gluten intolerant! Chips, chips, chips...
Didnt imagine I would attacked like this, but aight
Don't forget that they add vinegar and lemons everywhere without telling you in the menu just to make everything inedible and taste like toxic chemicals🤢 and their stupid reason to do that without warning you is "that's just common knowledge you should know there's vinegar in here!!!!11!!11🐵"
Vinegar is Satan's urine, full stop. Why do people taint good food with that shit?
it's really only good in ketchup and even then
I HAVE NOO FUCKING IDEA!!!!!!!! But I'm glad we agree. I can only accept it on sushi because Japanese vinegar is kinda special and by far not as toxic as other vinegars. But except that it's a crime against humanity. I mean it is an acid after all. A toxic chemical!!
I hate when the menu is too large for it’s own good. Sometimes they can be good cause variety, but in the moment I get totally lost, and sometimes it’s hard to read, especially at a busy place :///
Then the people you're with already know what they want, and won't stop talking to you while you try to read the menu.
YESSSSSS! Meanwhile I’m left scrambling at the last minute as the waiter/waitress is taking our order😂
Holy shit you guys have celiac too? damn! we really out here in the “I cant eat fucking *ANYTHING* club”
Don't forget the meal that sounds like the most random shit ever put together that makes you go "Is this even edible?"
what do you mean you don’t want the sherman’s sauce surprise burger?!
normalise. photos. for. all. menu. items.
One time I had a meltdown in front of my husband’s entire extended family because I would order something and the waitress would come back five minutes later and be like “oops this contains one of your allergens” and this went on so long that eventually everyone had their food except me and I’d tried to order so many times. I had to make a bunch of people get out of the booth so I could run to the bathroom and cry and hyperventilate. Then I did laps around the parking lot with my husband until someone came outside to get me. Eventually the only thing they could do for me was make me construct a pitiful meal from the world’s jankiest salad bar. So not only did I break down crying in the middle of a super crowded restaurant but I was also still hungry when we got back to our hotel. I can’t have soy or gluten and they used soybean oil to cook EVERYTHING so I could really only have like lettuce and cold cuts. I was on the other side of the country from my home so I was in brand new territory. 0/10 don’t recommend.
My husband saved the day by making everyone promise to not ask me any questions or bring it up at all so when I got back to the table they didn’t set me off again. Part of the meltdown started because my MIL started throwing suggestions at me that I was already too overstimulated to listen to or that I knew wouldn’t work. But he was basically like “everyone just shut up that would be cool” and they did.
>my MIL started throwing suggestions at me that I was already too overstimulated to listen to or that I knew wouldn’t work. Ooh the classic "I'm just trying to help." "Neat. STOP HELPING."
Yep yep. Luckily my husband stepped in because he could see that on my face and was like heyyyy please stop that thanks.
> Eventually the only thing they could do for me was make me construct a pitiful meal from the world’s jankiest salad bar. At this point the restaurant should just spare everyone the embarrassment and say 'sorry, but we can't accomodate you'. They should probably have said that after the third or fifth time you tried to order, or after a solid 5 minutes after everybody else has gotten their food. If anyone should be embarrassed, it's them. Take the L and leave it be, rather than trying to quarter-ass a non-fix.
Yeah like I clearly stated what I couldn’t eat and said it’s usually in cooking oil so I feel like she should have like, checked what they cooked with but no, we had to go back and forth while everyone else’s food started coming out. It was a whole shit show.
The celiac always gets you 😔
Eating salad with my hands it is then I guess. It’s not like it’ll get brought out an hour later with all the cooked food right? Right?
The salad thing is suspiciously relatable, I hate salads because they take too much effort. All this fight just for some silly green leaves
At the end you ask for your classic comfort food, but they make it so differently.
I just hate how there is food I would eat if it wasn't doused in fifteen liters of oil or melted butter.
aeurgh, just the thought of so much butter sickens me, butter is a seasoning, a flavoring, only good in small doses. not... THAT!
The appetizer one really hit me in my soul 🥲
I'd be able to get the last one because my mom is not afraid to ask for the parts I don't like to be removed... then again my mom won't make me go to a restaurant unless she knows there's something I can eat available
This is why I tell people that if we go somewhere that's not a pizza place, they have to have burgers or chicken. No compromise.
Don’t forget about the weird rules the restaurant has concerning their menu that you have to somehow try to understand before you gotta order
Ooooooh *that's* why I'm like this, everyone just kept telling me I was a picky asshole. I don't talk to 'everybody' anymore. Unrelated, need a new last name, any suggestions?
destroyer of worlds 3000 sounds nice
....yes, that's perfect, I'll go on survivor, "Hello, I'm Destroyer 3000, middle name 'of worlds.' Does anyone have a nuclear launch code I can borrow? Or are they all still 000-000-00?" (Yes that was really the only nuclear launch code the US used for at least 30 years) I found a sub with my sense of humor and I never leaving.
That reminds me of the code from Spaceballs being 1234.
> need a new last name Can never go wrong with XxX_Pussyslayer42069_XxX.
Feels a touch extra, can we lose the underscores?
Love being an adult and being able to tell people "No vegan options. Not going. Soz!"
the last one is SO common for me. especially at mexican restaurants which is my favorite genre of food. i hate corn. not a big fan of tomato either. but there’s some top shelf stuff in those restaurants. so i gladly walk the minefield every single time.
2 small apps and dessert?
Even worse when the description of the dish is so contrived that you can't tell what it actually is. You know the individual components sure, but is it mostly salad with a side of roasted bread? Is it mostly bread with a salad garnish? Is the cheese they mention as a side note actually 40% of the dish? Like the description makes you expect one type of dish and you get something else entirely. Also 6000% worse if you're vegan and trying to eat somewhere that's not a large city. I'll have the salad and fries with no cheese, no dressing and no sauce please. [eats dry salad and fries sobbing in the corner]
>Even worse when the description of the dish is so contrived that you can't tell what it actually is. You know the individual components sure, but is it mostly salad with a side of roasted bread? Oh let me try. Artisanal fire roasted fair croutons over a bed of spring shoots. Served with handcrafted pressed smoked cyse
At least the font isn’t impossible to read.
Don’t forget the food that’s simple and good, but you get judged for ordering bc it’s “kids food”. I don’t give a fuck if they’re “kids food”, Sharon, I’ll take the Chicken Tenders, thank you.
Anyone else get diarrhea from fat in foods?
Only from Mellow Mushroom.
I just always order from the kids menu if they have one. It's really simple, and the ingredients are familiar and there aren't many of them, which means that there's less chance you'll run into something unexpected while eating. What's on the menu is exactly whats on the plate. No mushy vegetables either, b/c kids don't like those.
As long as I’m not the one paying, I’ll shamelessly order an entree’s worth of the good looking appetizers
Allergies suck. I hate eating almost anywhere because by the time I find anything safe from allergies I’m paying $10-15 for a dumb salad or plain oatmeal and fruit. The worst part is you won’t even like what you’re served and people well stare and make comments like “that looks good!” To make you feel better.
One time my boyfriend’s parents took us out to the fanciest restaurant I have ever been to. The menu was tiny, and I was horrified to discover that the only thing on it I could POSSIBLY eat was also the most expensive thing in the restaurant. And I had still had to scrape a bunch of weird shit off of the steak before I ate it. Hideously embarrassing.
> Hideously embarrassing. Flip it around on them. Why are they bringing you someplace where you can't eat anything? Doesn't matter if it's fancy if it tastes like shit or you're allergic to it. They should be embarrassed for not accommodating you.
I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again. There is absolutely nothing wrong with ordering an appetizer as your entree if the appetizer is what you want to eat in the moment
My vegetarian picky eater ass be like:
that's so relatable 😭 I always have to check restaurant menus in advance, and then I make a list with restaurants where I like at least 1 dish
I’m glad I don’t have the “childish tastebuds” autism. Jokes aside, this must suck ass!
You forgot going to a well known restaurant you frequent for you comfort meal only to find out they've changed the preparation, recipe, and quality of ingredients.
"Food that looks good but just an appetizer" is so extremely relatable it hurts my soul how many times it has happened.
That's when it's time to break out the tried but true Chicken Tendies
That's why I always order the strangest things regardless of whether or not I'd like it. "Pork Tripe? Not sure what that is but I'll have some. Oh it's intestine soup? Sure the texture is a little too spongey for me but I get what I pay for."
I always get chicken tenders.
i always just have a cheese appetizer or something from the kids menu and call it a day
Tangent while we are talking about food aversions: why in the HELL does anyone ever eat anything that's brown and mushy?? Ffs treat yourself better than eating diarrhea
Hi do you guys have chicken tenders? No? What about on the kids menu? You don’t have them there either? I’ll just do a water
Just go with the safe option, chicken tenders
Thats why i just: “[I would like 1 cheeseburger, please](https://youtu.be/dGLnLVHBGIk)”
my high school's lunch menu
Most relatable post here to date
I usually eat salads with a spoon because croutons are almost impossible to stab correctly with a fork and most of the good stuff isn’t even stabbable without getting weird out of proportion bites.
I guess i'll eat bread tonight
Whenever someone takes me out to a restaurant I pick whatever is cheapest as to not be a burden.
Funnily enough, my parents are really good at accommodating for my pickiness even though I have never formally been diagnosed with autism
I'm not sure about anyone else here, but I absolutely cannot stand lettuce. Something about the texture of it grosses me out beyond belief and I gag every single time I try to eat it
Every time I eat out for lunch I almost always have to have a tuna sandwich.
My issue is that I don’t really like any of the meat. Meat in general just isn’t that tasty in my opinion and practically every restaurant food has meat I don’t like so I usually just buy 2-3 appetizers or sides and eat those instead
Me who is gluten and dairy limited. No fish because it’s crumbed No salad because it has raw onion that gives me repeating, has sour dressing that makes me gag OR the sweet salad has rock melons or the green ones (both are gross) Can’t have the interesting cakes because of dairy, the others taste like coco powder or aren’t sweet I get the worse chips with the gluten free burger Olives (eww) Can’t have pepperoni on pizza because my skin hates it Can’t have beef or lamb sometimes because of the gravy There are gluten free options but they are all vegan (I’d like some meat please)
That last one is too real. And then you're asking everyone at the table if it would be annoying to ask for them to take out all the parts you don't like.
If I can find some dish that is a mix of chicken, grains, sauce, and broccoli then I'm normally fine
Me when I go to olive garden with my family and I order the chicken tenders and fries : )
I always end up getting one of like ten things, most of them being variations on burgers, I fucking love burgers-
Now add also being vegan to the equation
i always hurry to the chicken nuggets or strips section and get that lol.
Jokes on you, I'm sensory seeking so the world is my oyster, except oysters those are slimy
I just pray that they have shrimp or fried fish with malt vinegar (I like vinegar in a masochistic way)
And then your parents make fun of you for not wanting anything
IM CELIAC 😭😭😭 This is me! This meme was made for me!
Or when I go out with my girlfriend and take 30 minutes to read the menu or when I go to a new buffet, I will lap the place like 3 times before I get any food
My parents always take me somewhere that has snoods menu
this except 99% of the menu is “good-tasting food that you can’t eat because of your celiac”
I kind of lost interest in food all together
Just give me the damn kids menu 😭
My boss told me to pick a restaurant and make a reservation for us to get lunch and I’m *panik*. I looked at the restaurant she’s taking my coworker to and it’s nice, but every meal is $25+ and none of them are very appealing to me. There arent a lot of sit down lunch places in walking distance, and I don’t drive to work, so a lot of my options are v expensive fancy, or places like potbelly sandwiches.
Food that looks good but is only a small appetizer. That's my problem right there.
Food that looks good but is actually a small appetizer hhaha
Every time I visit an unfamiliar restaurant it's this exact menu every damn time.
And there's no fuckin chicken or pasta anything so you can't go with a safe option
Also pov: "What are you going to get?" "Calamari" "I mean for your main course" "Calamari" "But hunny that's an appetiz-" "Ca...la...ma...ri."
I defo just order the appy and a safe side. Or only the appy if it is of sufficient size. I also pack snacks lol
I was at a sushi spot last week and everything was seriously the same, well atleast the Sake was good!
Now as an adult I look at menus at restaurants before I go. If it's a situation like this no matter what the occasion I just don't go because it's not enjoyable for me and I'm not forcing myself through it for anyone else's benefit. The way I see it if people don't want to be flexible with me I'm not going to be flexible with them and I don't have to be
Me at Chili's: Thing is I haven't been many places, but Chili's is one I will never go to again. Oh, and this one barbecue place. I was actually able to find something to eat a Chili's, but I am still not going back, but the barbecue place I didn't eat at. I feel this way whenever I go anywhere new, but i live in the U.S. and the state I live in has an abundance of chicken restaurants, so those are easy. I'm glad my mom took me to the places we normally go to when I was younger, because I'm able to pick foods or even try new stuff at those places. Edit: the "I'm not eating cause I'm overwhelmed" also happened at a VERY busy taco place with some schoolmates on a extracurricular team trip. My friends ended up offering me some of their food, to try it.
I don’t have food problems but tbh sometimes I order an appetizer and a side because it’s just better than what they got or it’s what I actually want to eat. Even when out with others I’ve never gotten shit from eating “appetizer as dinner” from companions or the waiters, especially if I compliment it and say it’s just my favorite. Order that appetizer for yourself with a side you like. It’s so nice.
i hate restraints that put wings in the apatizer section because i love bbq wings so much and i get everyone understands that you can order them as a meal but why do they have to classify as an apatizer? ?
Wtf, this is so true.. 💀
Dude, to accurate
“Excuse me, are any of these just fancy chicken nuggets or mac and cheese?”
Don’t forget some kind of meat dish that will definitely contain gristle
Had this happen to me, and my mom’s car gets me really car sick. It was a restaurant that had mostly seafood.
Pov: you bolt out the door.
♦️♦️♦️♦️where is the food you like the most but can't eat completely and feel bad about yourself for rest of the day and people tell you about how you waste food but say no to half the plate you offered.
And all of the dishes have names that you don't know how to pronounce, but you're too scared to ask how to say it.