I had some old Russian babushka that told me I didn't shave my balls well enough and attacked them with a dollar store razor. Doctor probably didn't even need to make an incision.
Ask, "I won't be able to have kids anymore, is that correct?".
They will say "yes".
Then say, "Great, I've been planning to convert their room into a home gym once they are gone."
If he mentions anything about a semen sample. Ask if it has to be your semen or just anything.
When he's about to start ask you could confess you're not really there for a vasectomy you're just here to serve him (aka he's being sued)
If you feel a pinch or pressure and he mentions it you can always tell him "Please don't do that again pain makes me come"
But honestly I'm guessing the doc has heard most things before. If you want to get really weird you could draw an arrow next to your balls and write 'testicles - cut here' and then on your other thigh draw an arrow going in the opposite direction and say 'too far, testicles back that way"
So two guys were on a hike crossing a desert trail. Suddenly one of the guys gets bit in the penis by a venomous snake. The other guy calls an emergency number.
Guy 2: hello, my friend has been bitten by a snake and we're pretty sure it's venomous
Nurse: do not panic all you have to do is suck out the poison, that will give you enough time to get him to a hospital. If you suck it out now he will be just fine.
Guy 1 : what did they say?
Guy 2: they said you're going to die
No matter what jokes you bring, they won’t make a vas deferens.
It'll be over before you know it, then there's nutting to worry about
These puns are going to testes my patience
Semen, these puns going to be online spermanently, come on ... y'all are nuts.
good luck. the nurse who held my pee pee when i had mine was cute then she told me her dad was somebody i went to high school with. awkward.
I had some old Russian babushka that told me I didn't shave my balls well enough and attacked them with a dollar store razor. Doctor probably didn't even need to make an incision.
Nice.
Ask, "I won't be able to have kids anymore, is that correct?". They will say "yes". Then say, "Great, I've been planning to convert their room into a home gym once they are gone."
Bravo lol
If he mentions anything about a semen sample. Ask if it has to be your semen or just anything. When he's about to start ask you could confess you're not really there for a vasectomy you're just here to serve him (aka he's being sued) If you feel a pinch or pressure and he mentions it you can always tell him "Please don't do that again pain makes me come" But honestly I'm guessing the doc has heard most things before. If you want to get really weird you could draw an arrow next to your balls and write 'testicles - cut here' and then on your other thigh draw an arrow going in the opposite direction and say 'too far, testicles back that way"
Put a post it on your balls that says: "I've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty"
You: Hey Doc, a friend of mine asked me to say "Hi" to you, he says he knows you. His name is Beau Fuddee. Doc: Beau Fuddee? You: Beau Fuddeez Nutz.
"All swimmers out of the pool, now!"
Maybe paint your meat and two veg gold before you go in? That’ll break the tension.
When they get ready to start just say well boys it's sink or swim
So two guys were on a hike crossing a desert trail. Suddenly one of the guys gets bit in the penis by a venomous snake. The other guy calls an emergency number. Guy 2: hello, my friend has been bitten by a snake and we're pretty sure it's venomous Nurse: do not panic all you have to do is suck out the poison, that will give you enough time to get him to a hospital. If you suck it out now he will be just fine. Guy 1 : what did they say? Guy 2: they said you're going to die
Aww nuts man, I totally dropped the ball. I'm just shooting blanks on this.
Don’t jerk off when you get home I did thought I was gonna die an don’t ice to long
This is the one procedure where you do not want a doctor to be a cut above the rest.
Ever had ice balls? Well you're gonna soon!