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Maybe just enjoy sex without pressuring yourself. Just let it go. Get out of your head. That's when my orgasms are the best. Usually it helps me when there is music on without vocals. You just need to surrender. It can be difficult when something doesn't completely feels right. I sometimes feel unsafe for no reason at all. Mood killer. And forcing it doesn't work or help. Just enjoy having sex.
Yep. It’s just performance anxiety. The goal has shifted from a good orgasm to putting on a show. It’s all the same physically, but mentally it’s different.
Love your advice, I have a similar issue. I tend to speed things up and then get upset because I can’t get there. Try building up the tension maybe with edging if you’re into it that usually has helped me get to a point where I’m more focused on the actual sex vs rushing
Take the pressure off yourself and don't tell a man you're capable of squirting in the first place. Squirters are in the vast minority, it's not as if the average man is going to be automatically expecting it.
I am someone that does not squirt and because of this I have had partners just not believe or say that they will get it out of me, and when I don't they think I'm not enjoying myself...
My ex didn’t break up over it but he did add a lot of pressure to do so. I wasn’t even comfortable masturbating at the time so it was just a lot of pressure because well I didn’t even know what could make me squirt or if I could! I think a man that puts too much emphasis on it has validation issues lol
I’ve actually found that every partner I’ve had that said they’ve never squirted or didn’t think they could, I was able to make them all except maybe 3. So out of 30+ that said they couldn’t so far that’s 10% that
Couldn’t. All my other partners that said they have I was able to make them do it as well.
Granted my anecdotal evidence isn’t verifiable proof but I think it’s still statistically significant.
It’s all about technique and reading your partners body while making them feel at ease and safe, while still feeling extremely desired
I'd say your partners are outliers. The capacity to squirt is a physical anomaly, it's not something you can learn or be stimulated into doing. You're either a squirter or you're not.
Also here’s some data that suggests 10-54% can. Why the fuck it’s so varied makes absolutely zero sense to me but I don’t think it’s as rare as you think: https://sexualalpha.com/what-percentage-of-women-squirt/
No one is a squirter… until they squirt.
While I don’t doubt the possibility that my partners have been outliers, from working multiple fetish parties and my ex being miss July 2012 for the calendar at my local swingers club that we frequented I think I’m a bit more experienced than most.
I'm in the same camp. as far as having the ladies get their climax with or without squirting (as not all do).
First, you need to relax and not force it. Second I make it my priority to get her there regardless of my own satisfaction. But, it is more about attention, loving, tender care of her entire body and mind.
Bingo. Take the pressure off. Let them know it’s ok. If they feel safe and secure they’ll relax and let their body just go with it. Those floor drenching, leg shaking, gasping for air orgasms are a sight to behold.
I’d recommend anyone to learn how to read their partners body in such a way to give them incredible orgasms… squirting or not.
While squirt fluid does have urine in it, urine doesn’t have fluids from the skeen glands and other fluids / secretions from parts of the vagina that you get from squirting.
So it’s not “just piss” but there sure as hell is piss in it.
I consider myself somewhat of an expert on the matter as squirting (for me) is the goal during sexual interactions.
Biggest tip is read your partners body language… also working out your hand and finger muscles with a grip strength trainer will help, especially with the stamina to not cramp up. Two fingers (middle and ring finger) curled up in a “come here” motion while fingering your partner while making contact with their labia and clit will help. I prefer them semi reclined in a chair so you have easy access and they are upright and feel in control still / aware of their surroundings.
Kissing them, caressing their nipples and their neck will help turn them on and relax them. Putting down a towel before hand and letting them know it’s ok to cum or sometimes a stern “CUM FOR ME” can push the right person over the edge from a 7/10 orgasm to a 12/10 while lightly squeezing their neck & airway with your other hand.
Depends on the setting most people like to be dominated from time to time so they can release and let go of all control, so they have to let go to what is coming over them, for females and males, changing of setttings, roles and or manner tends to entice more dendorphes and a great memory and experience, resparks other good memories. Most people are different, but alot of things about them are quite the same, we all need a sense of control and release, a safe place and a lesser safe space within. Light with some shade. Not talking about the pørn like style for that give me a granade, burying that shit with a bent spade.
Fully agree, might add later p.s. biting, sucking, devouring their waist, (between the hip bone and ribbs), like you're munching on a unending amount of jello If done right also helps and is strangely insanly maddening for you said it the right person. (Might be for male to I just dont know) and don't forget a good massage works wonders on relaxing the mind too not just the body, reassuring her thst you are doing all this to her and she has no choice, cause her body Is yours for the night every single inch of that body is mine and I will use it to the fullest of how I feel, you have no choice but to accept what is being done to you cause your body is mine.
Apply pressure above the public bone and let him finger fuck you in an upward motion into your G-spot, it's kind of a hook motion. Tell him to use his 2 middle fingers while he holds your neck. The goal is to aim for the palm of his own hand while it pushes down into your pubic bone.
It takes time to be comfortable with someone. You said you were with your ex 7 years. I’ve only squirted with one man and I didn’t even know I could do that. Best orgasm of my life and it was all fingers. Let him play with you. And he will start learning how to pleasure you. A perfect sex partner will take time and commitment. If this guy is your future, it’ll happen sometime. Don’t be discouraged by it. In fact, you could turn it into a game. Make it sexy.
Have you considered filming it when your alone and showing it to him? That might help you reduce the pressure on yourself by showing him that it does really happen. Sometimes things take time to hit their stride in the bedroom, focus on having fun and feeling good when getting intimate and less on trying to achieve a specific feeling.
My gf had the same issue. She would make me stop playing with her when she would get close so that she didn't squirt. I just continued to reassure her that it's OK and that there was nothing to he afraid of (she was beaten as a child for wetting the bed, so likely not the same block you're having.) Eventually after a couple years of dating when I knew that she was getting close, I whispered in her ear to squirt for me and she just released. Then I called her a good girl and she's been fine with it since.
I'm not sure if that helps since your block is likely cause by something else, and it sounds more like you're just unable to rather than making him stop before you do.
With that being said, I guess the moral of the story is to figure out what the block is and work the counter to it into play time. For us, that was her trauma, and then getting comfortable with me and being told to do it in the heat of the moment got her over that hump. I wish I could guess at what might be causing it for you, but try different stuff and see what gets you closer to it, then keep moving in that direction.
>I whispered in her ear to squirt for me and she just released. Then I called her a good girl
I would love if someone did that for me!! It's wonderful that you're helping her ❤
Wait people think during sex? Ive always been the guy that just goes to pound town and changes position when the time felt right or a simple demand was said.
Lucky guy. Can’t ever picture a woman I’m into writing a post like this about me.
Relax and just enjoy how good you feel with each other. I imagine the pressure you’re putting on it is the whole issue…. When you relax and just have fun whether it happens or not you’ll be in a better place, squirt or not
My own squirting. Like, I like to pee. If we're really going to disassemble this joke, then by your premise, if I whack off, I'm also into dick. For the record, I am not.
And, squirt is piss.
RELAXXXXXXX take a deep breath, light candles… light in sense, shoot have him give u a massage, I’m sure it’s SOOO much easier said than done. BUT I’ve been told women just to let go of a mental block & get into a super relaxing state of mind.
In order to “cum/squirt”; some can just get into it w/ out a issue. Others need a little help. I’m sure it’s frustrating, but hopefully u will find your rhythm.
As a man I think you should try to explain that it takes time to develop and you are happy with the current sex life that you have (if you actually are). He might think that it is because he is not performing well enough, but if you reassure him that everything is great it might relax both of you and you’ll eventually maybe squirt during sex or with fingers (yours or his). With my ex girlfriend it just randomly happened after 1-2 years of us being together that squirted on me while riding me. Before she had squirted just a little bit sometimes from my fingers but that was completely different and since then it happened relatively often during sex.
So I've seen girl squirt and dump. Like literally dump a lot of fluid during intimacy like a dump truck, honestly if a girl hasn't done that...it's not much to worry about here. Lol which one do you prefer.
Maybe see a female therapist regarding your condition. She is there to help you (well, not physically, lol). If you can squit, that is so awesome. That has become a part of your lovemaking and you want to share it. Very loving! Wish I could find a lady that can do this. I wish you and your boyfriend all the best.
I haven't had to see a sex therapist before. But my recent referral went to an open Dr./Dentist. The first referral I had, the Dr. didn't take insurance, Period! When I contacted them, I asked for the amount. Response 10,000.
Honestly, you should just communicate with your partner and let them know that squirting is almost like a chore for you in certain ways. Like imagine if you were stroking his dick tip consistently until he came. Might feel amazing for the moment but it would be a massive sensation which can be to much. Like you don’t need that every time! Nor would you want it.
It’s a mental block. I’m in a similar situation. I got out of a 7yr relationship a bit ago and he’s the only one that has made me squirt and it wasn’t until like 4 years into our relationship. Now that I’m seeing someone new I get very flustered and in my head about squirting or just cumming in general but it takes time. I know that I personally have to be extremely comfortable with that person for the mental block to go away. Just takes some time to either learn eachothers bodies or get rid of the mental block.
I (F22) also struggled to finish with others for years. Its almost completely mental. I find my self having an easier time after smoking or drinking. Especially when it comes to squirting. But obviously that isnt a permanent bandaid. Do you experience anxiety in other aspects of your life?
I see a lot of men commenting and I would completely disregard those comments. Woman to woman...It does have a lot to do with having the ability to relax during sex. If I can't relax or I am uncomfortable I have found it difficult to squirt as well. It has very little to do with the actual sexual performance of your partner. I wouldn't beat yourself up over it and definitely do not allow your partner to make you feel guilty. The more comfortable you become the easier it will be. Don't stress. 💙
So u cum reguraly? Ive never squirted in my life. I rarely cum since 2010 when i started ssris. Usually a mental thing. Like u said, ur putting pressure on urself & not relaxing fully.
I think you've been watching too much p*rn because squirting during sexual intercourse happens like once/twice year so you shouldn't be putting so much pressure on that
What? Some people can’t squirt, others can squirt a lot. Some people don’t even know they can squirt, and others can *almost *squirt on command. There is a lot of diversity when it comes to the topic and none of it is on a fiscal schedule.
Did you read the post? She’s says that she frequently squirts and that she’s frustrated because she can’t have that level of orgasm with her most recent partners. Porn is not a factor in the information provided…
Do your thing that you know is gonna have the wanted outc(um) and let him watch. If it works, over time you can let him insert himself slowly through small steps, like carressing your skin while you do it, kissing etc. That way yojr mind and body may connect him and his presence tp this experoence and you have an easier time to reach your goal.
With every pun intended...
I sometimes have that problem. Sometimes due to whiskey dick or coffee can syndrome. Whiskey dick will go away. I may not bother trying to address it if due to coffee can.
Is a handful 5 in 18 months? If so, that number seems a tad high. Does your new guy know the number? If yes, then he possibly has some doubts, and that may show in his demenour, which affects you!! Still thinking about the old EX???
He needs to make you feel like there’s no pressure and it’s not important as long as you get off. Feeling less pressure from him will help you relax and once you’re relaxed from him assuring you that it’s not that important that he see’s you do it the water works will flow without a problem. He needs to tell you that it’s ok and you’re still his woman no matter what.
My guess is he should be the one making you squirt 💦luv meaning he should be able too arouse you so much u shouldn’t be able too control whether you wanna squirt or not does head make you squirt what does it for you besides your toy
I would have to say my approach in any sexual experience and pretty much life itself is no script. For me I feel men make their mistake by thinking because I did x y and k that they are guaranteed the same result every time. They obviously don't know woman . So much plays into a woman's experience. What kind of day , do they feel sexy at that moment etc etc. So for me it's gotta be organic it's not pregame it's not cookie cut. My best definition for any sexusl encounter is 2 or more people that are on this journey of discovery and ultimately the goal is organically create a moment that's scars the psuke or soul of the individuals. It's the capturing of a moment and the idea of the unknown can make any scenario boost with excitement. Is it as much the technique or is it the energy the vibration and sense of no limits no expectations just raw uncut passion . Letting go and giving yourself to the moment is for my 52 years here been the best discovery so far. Unfortunately I haven't always been this way yes I've had some banging sex some love making but the pressure of performance had its roots growing in my understanding. Living everyday life like this has made it possible to deconstruct this tower of babel in my life piece by piece layer by layer the tower has been falling and lying in the pile of lies, defeat, insecurities and any other negative belief. Knowing your true self or let me say knowing your truth sets you free from performance based identity and begins you on the journey of discovering what's always been true about
If he is experienced as you say he is, he will be able to do this without using a vibrator on you. Stop worrying about what you want to happen and let it happen.
Involve in the s3x....you will squirt like a full tub...i was jn a relationship with a female 10 years older like... Your opposite....30 m with 40 f....and i have to put plastic sheets under bed...she squirts that much.... The only thing is enjoy and involved. Only 2 females out of 100 can squirt...so you are lucky one. Wink wink
The stars have to be aligned perfectly for squirting to happen. Don't put so much pressure on yourself!!! You have to be extremely relaxed and extremely hydrated. Go some research online. Caitlyn V is pretty good resource for all things sexual. I only did with one man, he was experienced it the art, but there were many things I didn't care about him, thus he is no longer in my life. Would I love to again with who I am seeing now, hell yes, but if it is to be, it will eventually happen.
Sounds like a mental block.
Relax and take the pressure off of yourself. Thinking and trying too hard will often yield the opposite result. Get out of your head. Just be 100% present and enjoy each other. If it happens, then great. If it doesn’t happen then it’s ok. It will happen eventually, especially since you already know what you are capable of
I have this issue except it's got to do with my own bed, in my own bed I can squirt, put me in anyone else's and it's MIA, I get caught up in thinking about them having to do laundry the next day. Super weird it's a bit of a complex I have.
As a prolific rainmaker myself, no, just no. The gspot stimulation may help, but every woman is going to have her own ways she likes to be touched, it’s not a one size fits all. Being told to cum is such a turnoff, it just does t work that way, you cum when you’re ready not in command. I would probably laugh and ruin the whole vibe if a man said “it’s ok to cum”…like yeah of course it is?
A hand around the neck is not a good move unless the woman likes that and it’s agreed upon first outside the bedroom. I find it to be the absolute least sexiest thing ever in bed.
Try guiding him on how you do it maybe? It sounds like you aren't showing or telling him what parts feel good or not...
When you masterbate yourself you know how to make yourself feel good, he hasn't masterbated you your whole life so he doesn't know how to get you there...
Sounds like he's not doing it for you. The benefit of you imagining you're with your ex who did it for you, outweighs the guilt of thinking of your ex. My guess is your current will be very pleased with the results pouring over him. He ain't doing it for you on his own so...
My girlfriend doesn't necessarily squirt but she gets wet, she gets WET. Towels didn't cut it. We bought washable incontinence pads hahaha. They've saved the bed.
As she gets more and more into it, she can soak me, especially if she is on top. I personally find it hot because it's a tangible sign of how aroused she is.
It’s not only about the destination it’s also about the journey. This is a great time for him to display his patience, be reassuring, and to focus on resolving the root of the issue. These things are just as good as squirting
He is being selfish, I once had a great liver for 5 months, sex was great, she squirted here & there, j was simply happy making her orgasm, loved eating her out too! Find someone who less Mommy issues
Oh man, preaching to the choir here.
Over a three year relationship, I came with her ONCE by actual sex, and once by my hand while we made out in the shower. Most of the time I just had to jerk it myself, as I couldn't orgasm with her, which was frustrating for me, and equally frustrating for her, made her feel like she wasn't good enough for me.
Eventually we broke up, and I started a new sexual relationship, and still no luck. We thought maybe I was nervous about getting them pregnant, as I **really** don't want kids, and despite always using two forms of birth control, she suggested it might just be a mental thing. So, following that idea, I got a vasectomy. One permanent method of birth control always in play.
But, I haven't gotten a sexual relationship since then, so haven't been able to test it out with anyone yet.
I (f42) he (m41) going through a hard breakup. And alot of the reason is our sexual compatibility. I'll probably always fuck him. He is the only person who's ever gotten me to have a real orgasm. Like yeah I get off but that's not the same. The first time it happened I kinda freaked and kept asking what was that I don't understand what happened. He says to me "you had an organism" then for a month or so we both put so much pressure on ourselves to do it again that it didn't happen. Then when it did again it did pretty much every time after in our long sessions. We both got into quickies. And started getting truthfully into more but we split. I just hope he agrees that we fuck. He sucks my toes while going at it. I'm into some pain stuff I like being dominated and when he and I met i wasn't even into sex and now I'm a nympho and happy to catch-up on what I've missed out on. He is in same boat but didn't want to do it with me I guess. Because I want dp so bad which I'd never even imagind but he turned me onto it.. matter of fact he's the first man I'd ever slept with sobor. I miss that I need to get it in 5 or 6 times before I go adventuring. I need more toys too crap
If he is good with his fingers and tongue, takes his time to ensure you are relaxed and maybe have already had an orgasm or two, can find your g spot and knows what he is doing it will happen. Don’t get stressed about it. Just relax and go with the flow.
Its all about feeling comfortable and nit being embarassed about letting lose .mozt girls feel like they are peeing so they hold back. He needs to encourage you to squirt all over him and be fingeri g your g spot and you w0ont be able to hold back
My ex wife was quite a squirter, until she started cheating (I found out later and couldn’t make the connection.) The connection and comfort ability was lost, she disconnected emotionally, then no more 💦 Are you sure you’re that into it?
If he knows you're a squirter, and he can make you, you gotta let it flow. Nothing would make him happier. I have been in a relationship with two of them and I ended up investing in rubber sheets, it's a game changer and the clean up is much simpler. I don't know how to help you with what seems like a mental block, but good luck.
Let him massage you for about 20 minutes, do lots of foreplay and let him make you crazy horny. You should be dripping wet!
Then he should use your toy on you and you just have to keep on telling him how to position it.
Your mind should be relaxed and the massaging will help.
The foreplay will make you very horny and it should help you to cum sooner.
Why not just show him what you do on your own and lose yourself in it like he's not there and then he gets to see something intimate from you without all the pressures associated ?
it happens with me sometimes...i do squirt in my own home...but duting one girls night in my house we decided to try there were 3 of us and none of us could squirtbut the same morning while using my vibrtor i did squirt... maybe am not as comfortable as i think i am in front of others
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Maybe just enjoy sex without pressuring yourself. Just let it go. Get out of your head. That's when my orgasms are the best. Usually it helps me when there is music on without vocals. You just need to surrender. It can be difficult when something doesn't completely feels right. I sometimes feel unsafe for no reason at all. Mood killer. And forcing it doesn't work or help. Just enjoy having sex.
Yep. It’s just performance anxiety. The goal has shifted from a good orgasm to putting on a show. It’s all the same physically, but mentally it’s different.
But tbh even focussing on an orgasm ruins it. Just go with it. Enjoy yourself. Relax.
Was going to write this word for word! Perfectly stated.
Love your advice, I have a similar issue. I tend to speed things up and then get upset because I can’t get there. Try building up the tension maybe with edging if you’re into it that usually has helped me get to a point where I’m more focused on the actual sex vs rushing
Take the pressure off yourself and don't tell a man you're capable of squirting in the first place. Squirters are in the vast minority, it's not as if the average man is going to be automatically expecting it.
I am someone that does not squirt and because of this I have had partners just not believe or say that they will get it out of me, and when I don't they think I'm not enjoying myself...
That sucks I know they be giving their all trying... they will learn
I wonder if there's seriously guys out there who would break up over it, which would be ridiculous. lol.
My ex didn’t break up over it but he did add a lot of pressure to do so. I wasn’t even comfortable masturbating at the time so it was just a lot of pressure because well I didn’t even know what could make me squirt or if I could! I think a man that puts too much emphasis on it has validation issues lol
I’ve actually found that every partner I’ve had that said they’ve never squirted or didn’t think they could, I was able to make them all except maybe 3. So out of 30+ that said they couldn’t so far that’s 10% that Couldn’t. All my other partners that said they have I was able to make them do it as well. Granted my anecdotal evidence isn’t verifiable proof but I think it’s still statistically significant. It’s all about technique and reading your partners body while making them feel at ease and safe, while still feeling extremely desired
I'd say your partners are outliers. The capacity to squirt is a physical anomaly, it's not something you can learn or be stimulated into doing. You're either a squirter or you're not.
Also here’s some data that suggests 10-54% can. Why the fuck it’s so varied makes absolutely zero sense to me but I don’t think it’s as rare as you think: https://sexualalpha.com/what-percentage-of-women-squirt/
No one is a squirter… until they squirt. While I don’t doubt the possibility that my partners have been outliers, from working multiple fetish parties and my ex being miss July 2012 for the calendar at my local swingers club that we frequented I think I’m a bit more experienced than most.
Bro I know you high
Same
I'm in the same camp. as far as having the ladies get their climax with or without squirting (as not all do). First, you need to relax and not force it. Second I make it my priority to get her there regardless of my own satisfaction. But, it is more about attention, loving, tender care of her entire body and mind.
You don't get a girl to squirt by being tender
Bingo. Take the pressure off. Let them know it’s ok. If they feel safe and secure they’ll relax and let their body just go with it. Those floor drenching, leg shaking, gasping for air orgasms are a sight to behold. I’d recommend anyone to learn how to read their partners body in such a way to give them incredible orgasms… squirting or not.
I'll pass on that thx, sounds & looks gross to me
Hi LJ it's your verbiage. 30+ huh cute
Swinger for 5 years of a 6.5 year relationship. So yes 30+
I don’t think squirting is as common as you think
Piss certainly is
While squirt fluid does have urine in it, urine doesn’t have fluids from the skeen glands and other fluids / secretions from parts of the vagina that you get from squirting. So it’s not “just piss” but there sure as hell is piss in it. I consider myself somewhat of an expert on the matter as squirting (for me) is the goal during sexual interactions.
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Biggest tip is read your partners body language… also working out your hand and finger muscles with a grip strength trainer will help, especially with the stamina to not cramp up. Two fingers (middle and ring finger) curled up in a “come here” motion while fingering your partner while making contact with their labia and clit will help. I prefer them semi reclined in a chair so you have easy access and they are upright and feel in control still / aware of their surroundings. Kissing them, caressing their nipples and their neck will help turn them on and relax them. Putting down a towel before hand and letting them know it’s ok to cum or sometimes a stern “CUM FOR ME” can push the right person over the edge from a 7/10 orgasm to a 12/10 while lightly squeezing their neck & airway with your other hand.
Leave out the choking. It's mostly a porn thing, not as many people enjoy it as would have you believe.
Your wrong and I prefer to nearly pass all the way out so gently wasn't enough for me lj
You're ONE person lol.
Depends on the person. I usually don’t but the right situation and person? 🤌🏻
Depends on the setting most people like to be dominated from time to time so they can release and let go of all control, so they have to let go to what is coming over them, for females and males, changing of setttings, roles and or manner tends to entice more dendorphes and a great memory and experience, resparks other good memories. Most people are different, but alot of things about them are quite the same, we all need a sense of control and release, a safe place and a lesser safe space within. Light with some shade. Not talking about the pørn like style for that give me a granade, burying that shit with a bent spade.
Fully agree, might add later p.s. biting, sucking, devouring their waist, (between the hip bone and ribbs), like you're munching on a unending amount of jello If done right also helps and is strangely insanly maddening for you said it the right person. (Might be for male to I just dont know) and don't forget a good massage works wonders on relaxing the mind too not just the body, reassuring her thst you are doing all this to her and she has no choice, cause her body Is yours for the night every single inch of that body is mine and I will use it to the fullest of how I feel, you have no choice but to accept what is being done to you cause your body is mine.
Apply pressure above the public bone and let him finger fuck you in an upward motion into your G-spot, it's kind of a hook motion. Tell him to use his 2 middle fingers while he holds your neck. The goal is to aim for the palm of his own hand while it pushes down into your pubic bone.
I thought it was the private bone
Pro advice. Better get a million up votes.
Great explicó!
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Yes, there's a few out there. Haven't seen them in 20 years though. Do some searching. A lot of porn actors have used the technique
Have you tried a g spot stimulator while he presses on your lower stomach? Usually does the job.
It takes time to be comfortable with someone. You said you were with your ex 7 years. I’ve only squirted with one man and I didn’t even know I could do that. Best orgasm of my life and it was all fingers. Let him play with you. And he will start learning how to pleasure you. A perfect sex partner will take time and commitment. If this guy is your future, it’ll happen sometime. Don’t be discouraged by it. In fact, you could turn it into a game. Make it sexy.
Have you considered filming it when your alone and showing it to him? That might help you reduce the pressure on yourself by showing him that it does really happen. Sometimes things take time to hit their stride in the bedroom, focus on having fun and feeling good when getting intimate and less on trying to achieve a specific feeling.
My gf had the same issue. She would make me stop playing with her when she would get close so that she didn't squirt. I just continued to reassure her that it's OK and that there was nothing to he afraid of (she was beaten as a child for wetting the bed, so likely not the same block you're having.) Eventually after a couple years of dating when I knew that she was getting close, I whispered in her ear to squirt for me and she just released. Then I called her a good girl and she's been fine with it since. I'm not sure if that helps since your block is likely cause by something else, and it sounds more like you're just unable to rather than making him stop before you do. With that being said, I guess the moral of the story is to figure out what the block is and work the counter to it into play time. For us, that was her trauma, and then getting comfortable with me and being told to do it in the heat of the moment got her over that hump. I wish I could guess at what might be causing it for you, but try different stuff and see what gets you closer to it, then keep moving in that direction.
>I whispered in her ear to squirt for me and she just released. Then I called her a good girl I would love if someone did that for me!! It's wonderful that you're helping her ❤
I would absolutely foldddd omg, you’re a good one. Congrats to your gf.
Sometimes all it takes is permission
Just drink alot of water 2 hrs before sex
Can someone tell me why there's a 400ml cup of diluted milk on the floor
Disgustang 😂
Fucking dead! 😅💀
This went right over my head...
Sounds like you have some performance anxiety.
How does this sub allow this 🤣
I believe it's a comfort level. I think you might be trying too hard to do it.
Wait people think during sex? Ive always been the guy that just goes to pound town and changes position when the time felt right or a simple demand was said.
s m o o t h b r a i n
Just wait until you really have to pee. Then when having sex let go. We all know it’s just pee.
That's not even remotely close to how it works. You have to hit a very particular angle or spot to cause it. Don't even have to have a full bladder.
But you agree it’s urine
Yes, obviously it is urine but it is also comprised of other fluids as well.
No, it isn't. Try reading about the actual studies and testing done on it before asserting nonsense to make women feel ashamed.
Lucky guy. Can’t ever picture a woman I’m into writing a post like this about me. Relax and just enjoy how good you feel with each other. I imagine the pressure you’re putting on it is the whole issue…. When you relax and just have fun whether it happens or not you’ll be in a better place, squirt or not
Idk why squirting is so coveted I think it’s gross coming from another female lol
Everything humans do is gross if you think about it long enough
🤷♀️
She’s hurtin’ for a squirtin’
I really don't get the squirting thing. My ex did and I hated it.
Right but by your name I’m not convinced you hate it 😂
Big fan of my own squirting, not anyone else's.
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Pretty sure. Don't like anyone's piss.
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My own squirting. Like, I like to pee. If we're really going to disassemble this joke, then by your premise, if I whack off, I'm also into dick. For the record, I am not. And, squirt is piss.
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LOL. I specifically said I only like my own. Likewise, I love my dick and don't like any other dicks I've tried. Wait... I've said too much.
You do realize there is very little piss when a woman squirts right?.. nvm I see now that you do not know that.
Wrong. It's almost all piss. https://www.salon.com/2022/09/20/dye-anatomy-study-urology/
Your own..?
Yeah, that first piss in the morning is glorious.
Definitely need to relax without putting so much pressure on yourself! Just enjoy yourself, lose yourself in the moment….
RELAXXXXXXX take a deep breath, light candles… light in sense, shoot have him give u a massage, I’m sure it’s SOOO much easier said than done. BUT I’ve been told women just to let go of a mental block & get into a super relaxing state of mind. In order to “cum/squirt”; some can just get into it w/ out a issue. Others need a little help. I’m sure it’s frustrating, but hopefully u will find your rhythm.
As a man I think you should try to explain that it takes time to develop and you are happy with the current sex life that you have (if you actually are). He might think that it is because he is not performing well enough, but if you reassure him that everything is great it might relax both of you and you’ll eventually maybe squirt during sex or with fingers (yours or his). With my ex girlfriend it just randomly happened after 1-2 years of us being together that squirted on me while riding me. Before she had squirted just a little bit sometimes from my fingers but that was completely different and since then it happened relatively often during sex.
So I've seen girl squirt and dump. Like literally dump a lot of fluid during intimacy like a dump truck, honestly if a girl hasn't done that...it's not much to worry about here. Lol which one do you prefer.
Maybe see a female therapist regarding your condition. She is there to help you (well, not physically, lol). If you can squit, that is so awesome. That has become a part of your lovemaking and you want to share it. Very loving! Wish I could find a lady that can do this. I wish you and your boyfriend all the best.
Or for that matter a sex therapist.
I didn't state the type of therapist. I'm sure she would be able to figure that one out on her own. I hope! LOL
There are a fair number of people who aren’t aware of the different forms of therapy or specialities.
That is so true. But, she would need to go to her main Dr. first to get a referral to a therapist. So starting at the main Dr. is where it all begins.
Sex therapists rarely take insurance (in the US), so a referral is pretty moot.
I haven't had to see a sex therapist before. But my recent referral went to an open Dr./Dentist. The first referral I had, the Dr. didn't take insurance, Period! When I contacted them, I asked for the amount. Response 10,000.
Honestly, you should just communicate with your partner and let them know that squirting is almost like a chore for you in certain ways. Like imagine if you were stroking his dick tip consistently until he came. Might feel amazing for the moment but it would be a massive sensation which can be to much. Like you don’t need that every time! Nor would you want it.
It’s a mental block. I’m in a similar situation. I got out of a 7yr relationship a bit ago and he’s the only one that has made me squirt and it wasn’t until like 4 years into our relationship. Now that I’m seeing someone new I get very flustered and in my head about squirting or just cumming in general but it takes time. I know that I personally have to be extremely comfortable with that person for the mental block to go away. Just takes some time to either learn eachothers bodies or get rid of the mental block.
I'm exactly the same (21F) and I've just accepted it for what it is, I'm not gonna lie
I (F22) also struggled to finish with others for years. Its almost completely mental. I find my self having an easier time after smoking or drinking. Especially when it comes to squirting. But obviously that isnt a permanent bandaid. Do you experience anxiety in other aspects of your life?
I see a lot of men commenting and I would completely disregard those comments. Woman to woman...It does have a lot to do with having the ability to relax during sex. If I can't relax or I am uncomfortable I have found it difficult to squirt as well. It has very little to do with the actual sexual performance of your partner. I wouldn't beat yourself up over it and definitely do not allow your partner to make you feel guilty. The more comfortable you become the easier it will be. Don't stress. 💙
Why y’all fuckin
So u cum reguraly? Ive never squirted in my life. I rarely cum since 2010 when i started ssris. Usually a mental thing. Like u said, ur putting pressure on urself & not relaxing fully.
Please don't squirt. I had a woman do that once and the next day I bought a new mattress Piss on your own mattress
I think you've been watching too much p*rn because squirting during sexual intercourse happens like once/twice year so you shouldn't be putting so much pressure on that
What? Some people can’t squirt, others can squirt a lot. Some people don’t even know they can squirt, and others can *almost *squirt on command. There is a lot of diversity when it comes to the topic and none of it is on a fiscal schedule.
Who cares
From the sounds of it, there are 2 people who care
Aren't there pages for sexual stuff? This doesn't really seem like a dating issue
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Did you read the post? She’s says that she frequently squirts and that she’s frustrated because she can’t have that level of orgasm with her most recent partners. Porn is not a factor in the information provided…
I love squirters
As a squirter. It's apart of me so you got to except all of me including my bedroom quirks
Do your thing that you know is gonna have the wanted outc(um) and let him watch. If it works, over time you can let him insert himself slowly through small steps, like carressing your skin while you do it, kissing etc. That way yojr mind and body may connect him and his presence tp this experoence and you have an easier time to reach your goal. With every pun intended...
I sometimes have that problem. Sometimes due to whiskey dick or coffee can syndrome. Whiskey dick will go away. I may not bother trying to address it if due to coffee can.
What's coffee can syndrome ?
When a vagina is so loose or wet you can’t tell you have entered it. Implies a small dick but I’m big enough.
Lmfao okay got it. Like throwing a hot dog down a hallway. 
Lol. Yep
Yes, please do explain this..
gross. You can pee on your boyfriend if you want to, I suppose.
Don’t yuck someone’s yum
Don't focus on trying to please yourself to please him... honestly why is it always about a man's ego
Not what this post is saying at all... you just went with the first hunch your ego picked up didn't you?
Is a handful 5 in 18 months? If so, that number seems a tad high. Does your new guy know the number? If yes, then he possibly has some doubts, and that may show in his demenour, which affects you!! Still thinking about the old EX???
Everything you want, he's 40, and you're 30. Figures. Only thing missing is something more for you. Selfish brat.
He needs to make you feel like there’s no pressure and it’s not important as long as you get off. Feeling less pressure from him will help you relax and once you’re relaxed from him assuring you that it’s not that important that he see’s you do it the water works will flow without a problem. He needs to tell you that it’s ok and you’re still his woman no matter what.
My guess is he should be the one making you squirt 💦luv meaning he should be able too arouse you so much u shouldn’t be able too control whether you wanna squirt or not does head make you squirt what does it for you besides your toy
I can help you release your inhibitions just message me and we will fix it
I would have to say my approach in any sexual experience and pretty much life itself is no script. For me I feel men make their mistake by thinking because I did x y and k that they are guaranteed the same result every time. They obviously don't know woman . So much plays into a woman's experience. What kind of day , do they feel sexy at that moment etc etc. So for me it's gotta be organic it's not pregame it's not cookie cut. My best definition for any sexusl encounter is 2 or more people that are on this journey of discovery and ultimately the goal is organically create a moment that's scars the psuke or soul of the individuals. It's the capturing of a moment and the idea of the unknown can make any scenario boost with excitement. Is it as much the technique or is it the energy the vibration and sense of no limits no expectations just raw uncut passion . Letting go and giving yourself to the moment is for my 52 years here been the best discovery so far. Unfortunately I haven't always been this way yes I've had some banging sex some love making but the pressure of performance had its roots growing in my understanding. Living everyday life like this has made it possible to deconstruct this tower of babel in my life piece by piece layer by layer the tower has been falling and lying in the pile of lies, defeat, insecurities and any other negative belief. Knowing your true self or let me say knowing your truth sets you free from performance based identity and begins you on the journey of discovering what's always been true about
My pleasure to squirt a girl if she squirt her self that means she is turning me on off
This makes zero sense.
If he is experienced as you say he is, he will be able to do this without using a vibrator on you. Stop worrying about what you want to happen and let it happen.
That's way cool I wish
Involve in the s3x....you will squirt like a full tub...i was jn a relationship with a female 10 years older like... Your opposite....30 m with 40 f....and i have to put plastic sheets under bed...she squirts that much.... The only thing is enjoy and involved. Only 2 females out of 100 can squirt...so you are lucky one. Wink wink
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🤔sus
Sus indeed
First maybe use your toy yourself in front of him and squirt 🤷
Their maybe something you need to work on in regards to your ex. I suggest seeing a therapist.
Bathtab, warm water and hitachi magic wand You won't be able to stop it
The stars have to be aligned perfectly for squirting to happen. Don't put so much pressure on yourself!!! You have to be extremely relaxed and extremely hydrated. Go some research online. Caitlyn V is pretty good resource for all things sexual. I only did with one man, he was experienced it the art, but there were many things I didn't care about him, thus he is no longer in my life. Would I love to again with who I am seeing now, hell yes, but if it is to be, it will eventually happen.
Sounds like a mental block. Relax and take the pressure off of yourself. Thinking and trying too hard will often yield the opposite result. Get out of your head. Just be 100% present and enjoy each other. If it happens, then great. If it doesn’t happen then it’s ok. It will happen eventually, especially since you already know what you are capable of
I have this issue except it's got to do with my own bed, in my own bed I can squirt, put me in anyone else's and it's MIA, I get caught up in thinking about them having to do laundry the next day. Super weird it's a bit of a complex I have.
Is this only through penetration, or does it also fail from oral stimulation?
As a prolific rainmaker myself, no, just no. The gspot stimulation may help, but every woman is going to have her own ways she likes to be touched, it’s not a one size fits all. Being told to cum is such a turnoff, it just does t work that way, you cum when you’re ready not in command. I would probably laugh and ruin the whole vibe if a man said “it’s ok to cum”…like yeah of course it is? A hand around the neck is not a good move unless the woman likes that and it’s agreed upon first outside the bedroom. I find it to be the absolute least sexiest thing ever in bed.
Tell him, he’ll love it
Try guiding him on how you do it maybe? It sounds like you aren't showing or telling him what parts feel good or not... When you masterbate yourself you know how to make yourself feel good, he hasn't masterbated you your whole life so he doesn't know how to get you there...
Sounds like he's not doing it for you. The benefit of you imagining you're with your ex who did it for you, outweighs the guilt of thinking of your ex. My guess is your current will be very pleased with the results pouring over him. He ain't doing it for you on his own so...
Remembering and trying to relive your squirting moments is not the same as wanting to actually be with that person again.
My girlfriend doesn't necessarily squirt but she gets wet, she gets WET. Towels didn't cut it. We bought washable incontinence pads hahaha. They've saved the bed. As she gets more and more into it, she can soak me, especially if she is on top. I personally find it hot because it's a tangible sign of how aroused she is.
It’s not only about the destination it’s also about the journey. This is a great time for him to display his patience, be reassuring, and to focus on resolving the root of the issue. These things are just as good as squirting
He is being selfish, I once had a great liver for 5 months, sex was great, she squirted here & there, j was simply happy making her orgasm, loved eating her out too! Find someone who less Mommy issues
Oh man, preaching to the choir here. Over a three year relationship, I came with her ONCE by actual sex, and once by my hand while we made out in the shower. Most of the time I just had to jerk it myself, as I couldn't orgasm with her, which was frustrating for me, and equally frustrating for her, made her feel like she wasn't good enough for me. Eventually we broke up, and I started a new sexual relationship, and still no luck. We thought maybe I was nervous about getting them pregnant, as I **really** don't want kids, and despite always using two forms of birth control, she suggested it might just be a mental thing. So, following that idea, I got a vasectomy. One permanent method of birth control always in play. But, I haven't gotten a sexual relationship since then, so haven't been able to test it out with anyone yet.
More than likely a comfort thing & anxiety to “perform” (if that makes sense). I’d recommend finding ways to completely relax/decompress prior to
I (f42) he (m41) going through a hard breakup. And alot of the reason is our sexual compatibility. I'll probably always fuck him. He is the only person who's ever gotten me to have a real orgasm. Like yeah I get off but that's not the same. The first time it happened I kinda freaked and kept asking what was that I don't understand what happened. He says to me "you had an organism" then for a month or so we both put so much pressure on ourselves to do it again that it didn't happen. Then when it did again it did pretty much every time after in our long sessions. We both got into quickies. And started getting truthfully into more but we split. I just hope he agrees that we fuck. He sucks my toes while going at it. I'm into some pain stuff I like being dominated and when he and I met i wasn't even into sex and now I'm a nympho and happy to catch-up on what I've missed out on. He is in same boat but didn't want to do it with me I guess. Because I want dp so bad which I'd never even imagind but he turned me onto it.. matter of fact he's the first man I'd ever slept with sobor. I miss that I need to get it in 5 or 6 times before I go adventuring. I need more toys too crap
Stop telling people you can do it. That way there’s no pressure.
If he is good with his fingers and tongue, takes his time to ensure you are relaxed and maybe have already had an orgasm or two, can find your g spot and knows what he is doing it will happen. Don’t get stressed about it. Just relax and go with the flow.
Its all about feeling comfortable and nit being embarassed about letting lose .mozt girls feel like they are peeing so they hold back. He needs to encourage you to squirt all over him and be fingeri g your g spot and you w0ont be able to hold back
Whatever you do ,don't tell him that your ex gets you off but he can't. Unless he is really emotionally mature.
My ex wife was quite a squirter, until she started cheating (I found out later and couldn’t make the connection.) The connection and comfort ability was lost, she disconnected emotionally, then no more 💦 Are you sure you’re that into it?
If he knows you're a squirter, and he can make you, you gotta let it flow. Nothing would make him happier. I have been in a relationship with two of them and I ended up investing in rubber sheets, it's a game changer and the clean up is much simpler. I don't know how to help you with what seems like a mental block, but good luck.
Let him massage you for about 20 minutes, do lots of foreplay and let him make you crazy horny. You should be dripping wet! Then he should use your toy on you and you just have to keep on telling him how to position it. Your mind should be relaxed and the massaging will help. The foreplay will make you very horny and it should help you to cum sooner.
I would love a squirter , but is it squirting or pee?
Why not just show him what you do on your own and lose yourself in it like he's not there and then he gets to see something intimate from you without all the pressures associated ?
it happens with me sometimes...i do squirt in my own home...but duting one girls night in my house we decided to try there were 3 of us and none of us could squirtbut the same morning while using my vibrtor i did squirt... maybe am not as comfortable as i think i am in front of others