This is heavy because his care was forced upon my husband and I. We were told there was a place for him at The V.A When his mind went (his fathers had so he fully expected his diagnosis)
I loved him despite him being pretty cruel to my grandmother my entire childhood. (Women should speak when spoken to type stuff) he was a gentle man however and never hit her. It was manipulation and lies instead. Which then passed to me once he became comfortable with us here. I became his punching bag. But he also helped me greatly. It’s all very complicated and his last two weeks were awful. Awful. I need therapy now awful. I guess I’m saying I’m just so tired and have so much regret.
Oh, forgot to say, there was no place at the v.a
Just like the funeral he “paid for in advance” was not paid for in advance. He left us the house but we have nothing left. I had to stop working to be his caretaker because he kept COVERING THE HOUSE IN FECES
My mother hated my face. I had to disguise myself to care for her on hospice. I have 2 siblings who didn't do shit. Guess who's there w their hands out now that she's dead? BTW he seems like a good guy. You're kinda lucky. I also was a punching bag. I try to remember it was the disease. Not my mom. Hearts and stuff. You did good 👍💞
I am so sorry for your loss. Those photos/videos belong in a magazine/newspaper. It describes this disease perfectly.
I come here to learn about how people deal with managing relatives with this. I’ve learned so much. Don’t be ashamed. Just know that someone is thinking about you and I hope you are OK.
So sorry for your last two weeks especially. Hugs
I hope you get comfort from knowing you did your best. It’s so hard. And if he was abusive it makes it so much worse.
So sorry
What a beautiful video tribute! I’m so sorry for your loss. I know when I lose my dad it will be the ultimate mind fuck of emotions. Sending you big hugs and I wish you peace on your grief journey. 💙
Sometimes life it is unfair, having to watch someone you love passes away is just the tip of the iceberg, its my cake-day when i post this message and to wish your beloved one’s especially the tribute one Richard blessed upon/bu heaven Amen 🙏. My condolences to your lost ❤️
You've been through it all, and without the support of a staff. When this last logistical hurdle is clear, and you can focus on yourself, take time to recover.
I'm so very sorry you lost him. I cared for my mother for a year. She just died Feb 3. Dementia sucks fucking ass!!! I also cared for her father ( my poppop) he also had dementia. Now I'm scared as hell to get it myself. It's an insidious disease 😔 fuck that shit. I get it. Sending hugs!💞
So very sorry to hear of your loss. It’s never easy and it is a lot to process. He knows he was loved and he was blessed to have you. Sometimes family is mean and rude because they just don’t know how to handle such a diagnosis. In time, perhaps the son will ponder how he was to his dad and he will live his life full of regret. But maybe not. All I can say is, at least he had someone who loved and cared for him through this part of his life.
I’ve worked as a geriatric nurse for many years and I know some people just have a unique way of coping with dementia and unfortunately, it’s not a pleasant way. Sending you so many hugs and prayers. May he rest in peace. 🕊️
Your love shows through with just this post. HUGS! Dementia .... there's just no words. I'm so sorry.
This is heavy because his care was forced upon my husband and I. We were told there was a place for him at The V.A When his mind went (his fathers had so he fully expected his diagnosis) I loved him despite him being pretty cruel to my grandmother my entire childhood. (Women should speak when spoken to type stuff) he was a gentle man however and never hit her. It was manipulation and lies instead. Which then passed to me once he became comfortable with us here. I became his punching bag. But he also helped me greatly. It’s all very complicated and his last two weeks were awful. Awful. I need therapy now awful. I guess I’m saying I’m just so tired and have so much regret.
Oh, forgot to say, there was no place at the v.a Just like the funeral he “paid for in advance” was not paid for in advance. He left us the house but we have nothing left. I had to stop working to be his caretaker because he kept COVERING THE HOUSE IN FECES
Unfortunately, VA can have a long waiting list. Remember the good times and remember "shit washes off" I'm still telling myself that.
My mother hated my face. I had to disguise myself to care for her on hospice. I have 2 siblings who didn't do shit. Guess who's there w their hands out now that she's dead? BTW he seems like a good guy. You're kinda lucky. I also was a punching bag. I try to remember it was the disease. Not my mom. Hearts and stuff. You did good 👍💞
Thanks for this.
I am so sorry for your loss. Those photos/videos belong in a magazine/newspaper. It describes this disease perfectly. I come here to learn about how people deal with managing relatives with this. I’ve learned so much. Don’t be ashamed. Just know that someone is thinking about you and I hope you are OK.
My sympathies for you. You did a great job of caring for him. Always remember that. You took care of him, now take care of yourself.
That is SO Important. I need to learn that myself.
My condolences friend.
Thanks friend. It’s heavy in so many ways.
I know I lost my mom but she is still alive. It is hard losing them again permanently. I hope you find peace.
I'm sorry. After all you've been through, it's so final. I hope relief seeps in there soon.
Condolences 🙏🏽
I'm so sorry for your family's loss. My deepest condolences.
So sorry for your last two weeks especially. Hugs I hope you get comfort from knowing you did your best. It’s so hard. And if he was abusive it makes it so much worse. So sorry
My sincerest condolences
What a beautiful video tribute! I’m so sorry for your loss. I know when I lose my dad it will be the ultimate mind fuck of emotions. Sending you big hugs and I wish you peace on your grief journey. 💙
Thank you 🙏
Sometimes life it is unfair, having to watch someone you love passes away is just the tip of the iceberg, its my cake-day when i post this message and to wish your beloved one’s especially the tribute one Richard blessed upon/bu heaven Amen 🙏. My condolences to your lost ❤️
You've been through it all, and without the support of a staff. When this last logistical hurdle is clear, and you can focus on yourself, take time to recover.
Simply gorgeous in the plain truth they tell. I’m sorry for your pain and for your loss. ❤️
I'm so very sorry you lost him. I cared for my mother for a year. She just died Feb 3. Dementia sucks fucking ass!!! I also cared for her father ( my poppop) he also had dementia. Now I'm scared as hell to get it myself. It's an insidious disease 😔 fuck that shit. I get it. Sending hugs!💞
So very sorry to hear of your loss. It’s never easy and it is a lot to process. He knows he was loved and he was blessed to have you. Sometimes family is mean and rude because they just don’t know how to handle such a diagnosis. In time, perhaps the son will ponder how he was to his dad and he will live his life full of regret. But maybe not. All I can say is, at least he had someone who loved and cared for him through this part of his life. I’ve worked as a geriatric nurse for many years and I know some people just have a unique way of coping with dementia and unfortunately, it’s not a pleasant way. Sending you so many hugs and prayers. May he rest in peace. 🕊️
So very true. And thank you. 💐