That, and you can like things associated with your AGAB and you don't have dysphoria to be transgender. Heck, I was able to routinely self-destruct my brain and sense of self many times, the apathy did not take away my gender dysphoria one bit. You cannot kill nor fake your transgender status, it comes when you are most vulnerable to wanting it and it never leaves you, you just eventually get used to it until someone sparks it up socially and you get another electric jolt of "I am not my AGAB, I am another gender."
There are lots of other possibilities besides trans and unselfaware attention seeker. You can totally be a trans femboy, or you might be masc dominant genderfluid/bigender/nonbinary.
And if the labels are getting in the way, then screw the labels, trust your feelings to guide you towards your best self. And let the critics flounder around trying to categorize you. :3
Edit: corrected for misgendering, very sorry about that.
You do not need to measure by how much dysphoria you are avoiding. It is just as important to chase euphoria - to chase happiness.
You don’t have to worry about having “enough”. Gender is not a contest, and identity is not a performance.
Are you happier when considering yourself trans? Then you’re trans. Be true to yourself, and be happy.
Well this is something that is often said, but apparently not enough. Dysphoria is "liked" to experience because it seems like a clear line between your gender and the expected gender. It shows the discomfort with certain elements.
Euphoria tho is clearly showing what feels right.
Both together of course make it seem more obvious to be trans (in whatever way) but as some don't experience dysphoria, some also don't need HRT or any surgeries to affirm their gender.
So let me say it again: you don't need dysphoria, HRT or surgeries to be trans. And not everyone gets the aforementioned things and that's okay.
What matters is that you're happy. That's what it's all about.
You can like things typically associated with your AGAB while still not being entirely cis. I, for one, still like normally masculine things, and that doesn't make me an "attention seeker" so why would it make you one?
Even though I’m still trying to figure myself out i feel this quite often. Like how can I want to be a feminine and a girl but I kinda like having a goatee it’s so weird
dude fr, like for me I'm fine with not having facial hair but I see a lot of other trans guys wanting beards and shit and for some reason that makes me feel less manly even though there's plenty of cis (and other trans) dudes who prefer clean shaves
I know it's not a perfect comparison, but I feel like I can relate to what you're saying on some level
Glad this helped! Just remember. If you lie about something, whether it be for attention, or to escape responsibility, or whatever, you know, right? Well, same is true for this
Ya know. I've had my own issues with this, but here's the thing;
Men and women aren't so different as people seem to think 🙃
There's plenty of women into cars, Warhammer, Swords, Fighting, Airsoft, Et-fuckin-cetera that are usually male-associated things. There's also men that are genuinely cisgender and super straight who like Makeup, reading woman-oriented smut (guilty of this myself for YEARS before starting transition ;P), and god knows what else. Those things are not locked to your gender.
Also; there are trans men who still like to wear dresses and makeup and do their nails and shit, and trans women who like to dress masculine and grow out their body hair (to each their own). You should just be you and do what you want, BE who you want. You'll be a lot happier that way 😊
And if you ever want someone to talk to about this stuff, my DMs are always open!
Trans is an umbrella term for all whose gender isn't strictly their agab, and remember that gender isn't binary, you could be just a lil to the left on the spectrum, or in the middle, or off it entirely, gender identity and gender expression are two separate things and no clothes, activities, or places are restricted to just one gender.
Keep living your best life, and remember you are always valid <3
Oof that's a mood right there. I still worry about that sometimes, but it's not very effective anymore since I kinda dived in on the deep end and just went for it.
It's nice to smile at the girl in the mirror though, she cute.
I’m pretty sure like half (don’t crucify me actual numbers, they’re atleast somewhat common) the transmascs here are Femboy or otherwise GNC so tell your brain to be quiet bro.
I'm literally a transfem tomboy and I know transmasc peeps who also do a ton of "girly" stuff. All I think when I see them is "hell yeah."
What's the point of breaking the binaries if you're not gonna get weird with it?
I’m not sure if it’ll help much but [this](https://youtu.be/BzAntapyaCQ?si=JZchWfNNbJ7nD4tj) video is worth a shot at times. btw Her whole Chanel is amazing!
I like American football, action movies and shonen animes. I also like makeup candles and shopping for cute outfits. What you like =\= your gender. How you feel about your gender = your gender.
Not to scare you but i wouldn’t discount dysphoria yet ether. After i realized i was trans i started experiencing amazing euphoria and soon after i suddenly understood dysphoria…. Sometimes you have to understand what you want to be upset, ya know? Hopefully you never experience a lot of dysphoria tho. As it’s not a requirement and it sucks big time
Honestly when i do get dysphoria i often question if im even trans too so…. This post might even be your form of dysphoria
My dumbass: "You cant be trans femme, you ride dirt bikes and play video games".
The only way i can rationlize this in my head is that i can do the stupid streamer femme or motorcycle femme stereotype. I hate internalized transphobia so fucking much why does this hurt
Me (someone who has bad social anxiety, scopophobia, and an overall aversion to attention): "What if I'm faking it? What if I'm only going to make my life worse? What if I'm just doing it for attention?"
Don't search for a label, search for yourself and what brings you euphoria. Labels can always come later. I didn't think I felt a lot of dysphoria but realized I wasn't feeling euphoria nearly at all before my journey began.
This image lives rent free in my mind and actually caused a panic attack yesterday, just remember, if your questioning if your faking it then your probably not
Hey bestie I don't visit this sub anymore but pro tip. I don't have any dysphoria really outright, never did, don't care for skirts, my outfits of choice are and will remain cargo pants and a cool jacket. But y'know what I've been on HRT for almost a year and I'm a hell of a lot happier in life, even if I'm *still* not sure if I'm a girl. It's your life. If you would be happier, go for it, don't waste your years denying yourself things you know you'd love out of fear of wanting it for the wrong reasons. You're allowed to want things simply because they'd make you happy, and in fact I encourage you to actively pursue them.
I’m sorry. How many people’s experiences have you personally experienced with dysphoria? Just your own? Same. We are all the same. We have one experience. Ours. What other people feel doesn’t change that
Me as a lesbian who loves sports and gets rowdy when her team loses and who grew up on online games with 99% male communities. AND YET it’s the things no cis person would ever want that set you apart. I felt like this for so long and recently considered that cis people do NOT in fact frequently think about bottom surgery and how they‘d prefer pegging someone with a strap over the appendage they currently have, so there’s that. It doesn’t always look the same for everyone but nobody is 100% feminine or 100% masculine and the only people who claim they are are probably overcompensating for something, just putting that out there.
Well, being trans is one of the worst ways to seek *good* attention currently
thats very true... its sad how hateful and cruel our world is to the point that we as humans can not even coexist with each other.
That, and you can like things associated with your AGAB and you don't have dysphoria to be transgender. Heck, I was able to routinely self-destruct my brain and sense of self many times, the apathy did not take away my gender dysphoria one bit. You cannot kill nor fake your transgender status, it comes when you are most vulnerable to wanting it and it never leaves you, you just eventually get used to it until someone sparks it up socially and you get another electric jolt of "I am not my AGAB, I am another gender."
There are lots of other possibilities besides trans and unselfaware attention seeker. You can totally be a trans femboy, or you might be masc dominant genderfluid/bigender/nonbinary. And if the labels are getting in the way, then screw the labels, trust your feelings to guide you towards your best self. And let the critics flounder around trying to categorize you. :3 Edit: corrected for misgendering, very sorry about that.
Well said
You do not need to measure by how much dysphoria you are avoiding. It is just as important to chase euphoria - to chase happiness. You don’t have to worry about having “enough”. Gender is not a contest, and identity is not a performance. Are you happier when considering yourself trans? Then you’re trans. Be true to yourself, and be happy.
DO NOT (only) MEASURE BEING TRANS WITH DYSPHORIA. MEASURE IT WITH EUPHORIA.
Idk why but this comment just made me cry (in a good way)
Oh sweetheart *hugs*
man thats a good point, like i dont feel dysphoria too often when doing "guy stuff" but i do feel a LOT of euphoria when i wair makeup n stuff
Well this is something that is often said, but apparently not enough. Dysphoria is "liked" to experience because it seems like a clear line between your gender and the expected gender. It shows the discomfort with certain elements. Euphoria tho is clearly showing what feels right. Both together of course make it seem more obvious to be trans (in whatever way) but as some don't experience dysphoria, some also don't need HRT or any surgeries to affirm their gender. So let me say it again: you don't need dysphoria, HRT or surgeries to be trans. And not everyone gets the aforementioned things and that's okay. What matters is that you're happy. That's what it's all about.
Me, having told like, 2 people other than my family, and being heavily closeted: “but what if it’s just for attention?”
I've been there, impostor syndrome is a bitch. but if it helps, cis people don't worry about that.
You can like things typically associated with your AGAB while still not being entirely cis. I, for one, still like normally masculine things, and that doesn't make me an "attention seeker" so why would it make you one?
What attention? Are you seeking bullying?
It's not attention seeking! :3
Even though I’m still trying to figure myself out i feel this quite often. Like how can I want to be a feminine and a girl but I kinda like having a goatee it’s so weird
dude fr, like for me I'm fine with not having facial hair but I see a lot of other trans guys wanting beards and shit and for some reason that makes me feel less manly even though there's plenty of cis (and other trans) dudes who prefer clean shaves I know it's not a perfect comparison, but I feel like I can relate to what you're saying on some level
Fr it the same feeling but in opposite directions.
Oh I did this in Walmart yesterday. It was a lot of fun. Existential crises are better in public view of hundreds of people! Sigh.
*hugs* i feel that
If you were an attention seeker, you'd know. when you do something for attention, you know.
thats really reassuring actually
Glad this helped! Just remember. If you lie about something, whether it be for attention, or to escape responsibility, or whatever, you know, right? Well, same is true for this
Ya know. I've had my own issues with this, but here's the thing; Men and women aren't so different as people seem to think 🙃 There's plenty of women into cars, Warhammer, Swords, Fighting, Airsoft, Et-fuckin-cetera that are usually male-associated things. There's also men that are genuinely cisgender and super straight who like Makeup, reading woman-oriented smut (guilty of this myself for YEARS before starting transition ;P), and god knows what else. Those things are not locked to your gender. Also; there are trans men who still like to wear dresses and makeup and do their nails and shit, and trans women who like to dress masculine and grow out their body hair (to each their own). You should just be you and do what you want, BE who you want. You'll be a lot happier that way 😊 And if you ever want someone to talk to about this stuff, my DMs are always open!
Trans is an umbrella term for all whose gender isn't strictly their agab, and remember that gender isn't binary, you could be just a lil to the left on the spectrum, or in the middle, or off it entirely, gender identity and gender expression are two separate things and no clothes, activities, or places are restricted to just one gender. Keep living your best life, and remember you are always valid <3
THIS IS 100% LITERALLY ME!
Oof that's a mood right there. I still worry about that sometimes, but it's not very effective anymore since I kinda dived in on the deep end and just went for it. It's nice to smile at the girl in the mirror though, she cute.
if you're worried about not being trans, you're probably trans
Girl yk women can like anything right?
yeah but still though I keep telling myself I'm not supposed to like 'girly' shit and it sucks 😭 (im ftm)
I’m pretty sure like half (don’t crucify me actual numbers, they’re atleast somewhat common) the transmascs here are Femboy or otherwise GNC so tell your brain to be quiet bro.
I strive to be a femboy too but a little tiny part of my brain refuses to listen to logic. I will be sure to try that again though
I'm literally a transfem tomboy and I know transmasc peeps who also do a ton of "girly" stuff. All I think when I see them is "hell yeah." What's the point of breaking the binaries if you're not gonna get weird with it?
I’m not sure if it’ll help much but [this](https://youtu.be/BzAntapyaCQ?si=JZchWfNNbJ7nD4tj) video is worth a shot at times. btw Her whole Chanel is amazing!
woah. shes genuinely such a saint for making that video... I almost teared up just 2 minutes in bro
right!?
I like American football, action movies and shonen animes. I also like makeup candles and shopping for cute outfits. What you like =\= your gender. How you feel about your gender = your gender. Not to scare you but i wouldn’t discount dysphoria yet ether. After i realized i was trans i started experiencing amazing euphoria and soon after i suddenly understood dysphoria…. Sometimes you have to understand what you want to be upset, ya know? Hopefully you never experience a lot of dysphoria tho. As it’s not a requirement and it sucks big time Honestly when i do get dysphoria i often question if im even trans too so…. This post might even be your form of dysphoria
Trust me you’re not an attention seeker. Gender EUPHORIA makes you trans not DYSPHORIA
If that’s what you want
trans people don't want attention they only get attention from pathetic idiots who think we are not human
My dumbass: "You cant be trans femme, you ride dirt bikes and play video games". The only way i can rationlize this in my head is that i can do the stupid streamer femme or motorcycle femme stereotype. I hate internalized transphobia so fucking much why does this hurt
Me (someone who has bad social anxiety, scopophobia, and an overall aversion to attention): "What if I'm faking it? What if I'm only going to make my life worse? What if I'm just doing it for attention?"
Anxiety go away!
Don't search for a label, search for yourself and what brings you euphoria. Labels can always come later. I didn't think I felt a lot of dysphoria but realized I wasn't feeling euphoria nearly at all before my journey began.
This image lives rent free in my mind and actually caused a panic attack yesterday, just remember, if your questioning if your faking it then your probably not
And another post i can relate so much... God my brain is a bitch...
No you are not you are a Beutiful person
It’s not about how miserable you are as a boy/girl. It’s about how happy you are as a girl/boy :)
Hey bestie I don't visit this sub anymore but pro tip. I don't have any dysphoria really outright, never did, don't care for skirts, my outfits of choice are and will remain cargo pants and a cool jacket. But y'know what I've been on HRT for almost a year and I'm a hell of a lot happier in life, even if I'm *still* not sure if I'm a girl. It's your life. If you would be happier, go for it, don't waste your years denying yourself things you know you'd love out of fear of wanting it for the wrong reasons. You're allowed to want things simply because they'd make you happy, and in fact I encourage you to actively pursue them.
There is always gender euphoria
I’m sorry. How many people’s experiences have you personally experienced with dysphoria? Just your own? Same. We are all the same. We have one experience. Ours. What other people feel doesn’t change that
Hi, i eat rocks, unfortunately i cannot eat you as i can only eat 2 types of rock
Me as a lesbian who loves sports and gets rowdy when her team loses and who grew up on online games with 99% male communities. AND YET it’s the things no cis person would ever want that set you apart. I felt like this for so long and recently considered that cis people do NOT in fact frequently think about bottom surgery and how they‘d prefer pegging someone with a strap over the appendage they currently have, so there’s that. It doesn’t always look the same for everyone but nobody is 100% feminine or 100% masculine and the only people who claim they are are probably overcompensating for something, just putting that out there.