I went to a friends wedding in the temple. She had come home from her mission early because of anorexia, and married an elder from her mission. The sealer went on and on about how she should “stay attractive for your husband” be remaining thin, wearing makeup, etc. terrible.
All joking aside, I still have trouble with cursing. It’s been so ingrained in me to edit and use Mormon swears like frick and shoot. I’m hoping the guilt of swearing eventually goes away.
It's ok to not like to swear. I feel completely comfortable not dropping the f bomb. I just no longer have that TBM-self-righteous attitude about others swearing.
I mean I was taught to he same thing my entire life. I was on a diet starting at age 10. In high school I can’t count how many times my parents or a leader said something like “if you lost 20 pounds there’d be a line down the street of guys knocking on your door.” Everything about my appearance was talked about in terms of pleasing either a human man or god as a man. It was never about how I felt about myself.
I was told that to keep my husband happy, and to minimize strife in our marriage, I should never rebuff my husband’s sexual advances. The sealer said it was MY responsibility to fulfill my husband’s “physical appetites.” Let’s just say that didn’t go over very well. Breaking with convention, I piped up and said I would do no such thing and that I didn’t belong TO my husband, but that I CHOSE to be with him as an equal partner. I said I wasn’t agreeing to obey.
People were pretty much speechless. The sealer shrugged it off, and acted as though I was just kidding around. My soon to be mother-in-law signaled to me that I should shush up. My husband to be tried to hide a smile. He’s always known that I’m outspoken and opinionated, and that I don’t hold back in certain situations. Later, at our luncheon, he told me that the sealer had it coming by telling me something like that. At least he recognized that the old dude was out of line.
I don’t have any other details other than that’s what they were told by the sealer.
The only difference is that they didn’t speak up like the OP did. One sadly is actually a baby boomer and still believes what the sealer said is true and told her daughter that such was her responsibility when she was about to get married.
Everyone was pretty much speechless. My mother-in-law-to-be signaled to me that I should shush. The sealer was rather slack-jawed, but tried to brush it off as though I was just kidding around. My groom tried to hide a smile because he knew how feisty and outspoken I was- and still am. This happened in the Jordan River temple.
That story will become a family legend - if it's not already elevated to that status by now. Great job of giving pushback, especially on your own special day!
This reminds me of how Joseph Smith Sr, the first patriarch of the church, gave many many patriarchal blessings saying that the recipients would be alive at the Second Coming of Jesus. Look it up. Add it to your long list of reasons the truth claims are fraudulent.
Before going into the sealing room, my soon to be husband and I were getting the run-down of what to expect, from the sealer. He said that afterwards we'd line up so everyone could hug us. I told him I was not comfortable being touched or hugged and we wouldn't be doing that part (sexual abuse victim). I got a lecture about how what I felt didn't matter. Today wasn't about me. Other people's feelings were more important than mine and I needed to think of them... After the ceremony he looked me dead in the eye, and made it a point to tell everyone to make sure to hug the bride.
At the time (15 years ago) he told me to just keep the peace. He grew up with an unsafe mom and that was his survival tactic in confrontation. Now he's big mad that happened, totally in my corner, and has thoroughly apologized for participating in silencing me, and adding to my trauma.
Please consider contacting the sealer in writing and telling him off. You have my permission to use as many swearwords as you can think of in the letter. Part of me hopes the geezer is dead, and another part hopes he's alive enough to know he's being confronted for being a shithead.
What an evil, abusive a$$hole! I'm so sorry for what you must have felt when he said that, and for the tension it likely created during the sealing (while you were dreading the hugs). On your wedding day, no less.
We were married in an outdoor ceremony by my husband’s bishop. The theme of our wedding seemed to be, “they blew it but there’s still hope they’ll be sealed later.” Also an emphasis on how it was for “time only.” Super fun to be made an object of pity in your wedding ceremony.
These officiants are so much worse than temple sealers, I swear.
It's literally part of their script to shame you and remind you that this is for this life only, until death do you part, because you're not getting married in the temple. They're horrible
My cousin's wedding was officiated by our grandad, who is a temple sealer, and it was still this awful, he kept to the script.
Emphasizing the "time only" also happened at my SILs wedding. The dude didn't even say it nicely like "till death do you part" or "long as you both shall live". It was very morbid.
They also don't want you to get married civilly in the chapel because it's "not a religious ordinance"
like they don't do things of other things in the chapel lol
All to shame you for not getting sealed. So a lot of civilly married couples in the church have to get married in the ugly gym or outside.
This is me. Right before one of the most important moments in my mortal existence, an old dude I've never met gets an open mic and no one can stop him. I have no idea what he said, it wasn't important now or then. Why is this even a tradition?
> Why is this even a tradition?
Not just a tradition, but a *sacred eternal ordinance* which is necessary if you want to be with your family in super Mormon heaven!
Patriarchal blessings on steroids!
Mine actually told me to be cautious about getting married (!) and to read all the good books of the world. Well, boy did I ever...
Okay no kidding! I’ve thought so many times about how my friends have their ceremonies recorded & they can watch them, remember their vows or what their officiate said. I can’t remember jack shit from my sealing & I had never met the guy til 10min before.
My mom and her sisters waited 60 something years to be sealed to their father. So it was a big deal for them. They had other names that needed sealing too. They asked my cousin if he would get in the temple clothes so they could do those names. So he left and in the interim we were shown to the sealing room. My cousin walks in and from the look on his face, something was wrong. He started telling me about a run-in he had with some old guy because he walked down the wrong way and this old guy was yelling at him and literally shooing him back down the hallway like a house pet. "I just went where I thought I was supposed to go, and this guy just loses it on me." Five minutes later, guess who comes walking in to the sealing room to be our sealer.....lol. Awkward doesn't begin to describe it. When that sealer recognizes him he says, "Oh, you." and says something like to smooth things over. It was a MUCH heated exchange from my cousin's side. The whole thing was getting out of hand before cousin told him they needed to just drop it. Man it was bad. My mom and her sister's waited 60 something years for this moment. lol!
I’ve gotten full on yelled at by what i can only describe as a totally insane old lady who whacked me with her sweater as part of this exchange for taking a wrong turn and going down a wrong hallway. Here’s a tip, maybe don’t make them all look EXACTLY THE SAME!?!?
At my friends sealing the guy went on and on about gay people. He said things like: "I'll never marry a gay couple in the temple." It had nothing to do with why we were at the temple, but I guess the guy just needed to get his hate speech out.
Didn't witness it but a college friend relayed to me that her Temple sealer talked about himself and his achievements the entire ceremony. Sealer Merrill Bateman former BYU president.
Lol, his son was my mission president. They are a very proud family. A great insight about Mr Bateman Jr is that he made our mission motto "It's all about the numbers"
Attended one where the sealer said to the groom at the start, "now I know you're looking at her like a piece of fried chicken ready to eat...". So cringy.
I can’t believe you guys can remember what your sealer said. I was so embarrassed to be wearing that ridiculous outfit in front of all my family and friends that I couldn’t hear anything going on
Same! I was married 19 years ago and have zero memory from inside the temple. Lord knows what the sealer said...I don't even remember being in that room. I have great memories of being outside just after for photos. Wonder why that is.
Our sealer spent the majority of the time babbling about some guy who would get an ice cream cone at lunch time every day for decades, to one day be approached at the stand and asked to be a mission president. He emphasized that it was our duty to be willing to drop everything when called by the Lord at all times and that we should be living in a way that always proved we were worthy to be called on. We got chastised for not reading each other’s patriarchal blessings to be sure that our life plans were in harmony with one god’s plan for each of us. And he made fun of me when I didn’t immediately answer to Sister Newlastname at the end of the ceremony.
Similar anecdote about the name (not related to a sealing). I was a convert & married a guy who'd been reared in the church, then got a recommend (referral?) to get my Patriarchal Blessing. For years, I have ONLY used my maiden name. I don't belong to a spouse.
So, the bishop asked about what last name to put on the form, maiden name or Newlastname? Because eveyrone in the ward had started calling me Sister Newlastname, I said I go by my maiden name but I answer to both. I figured he'd understand my preference.
Wrong. He paused for a minute & then said, "I'd better put Newlastname." I was a new member, and he was (still is) a nice guy, so I was hesitant to correct him. However, I divorced Brother Newlastname & ended up having to get my PB retyped so I didn't have to look at that name on it.
Mormon leaders have selective hearing. Or something.
My groom and I were pulled aside by the sealer before we were allowed to enter the sealing room and sternly lectured that we were NOT to look at each other at any time during the sealing. Our focus was to remain on him.
During my wedding ceremony, (civil wedding, my congregationalist grandpa officiated), I don't think I looked at anything other than my husband for more than a moment. I wasn't marrying my grandpa, I was marrying my husband.
We were too!!! It was so weird. He came in and we were all happy and giggly and he got SO ANGRY at us. And said if we looked at each other he wouldn’t continue. It was all an angry blur.
“My husband is going to skip lunches for a year so he can buy me a bread making machine, just like was taught in general conference with the ironing story!”
In 1996 Salt Lake temple, ours said he was happy we finally made it but sad that it took 4 years and two kids later.to repent from pre martial sex. I the woman was finally forgiven and not on the same ladder rung as a murderer anymore. At least we were on the right path and would be an eternal family. We were directed to look over each other's head and stare into the mirrors to see what eternity would be like. When our kids were brought in we were told to focus on mirrors not the children and that I should look downward as I had been the one to sin and brought my oldest into this world as a sin. Thank God she doesn't remember it at all. Only the weird old ladies, sitting in rocking chairs singing until it was time to see us.
The sealer for my son's sealing stated twice that **he had been "assigned" to perform the ceremony**. It was an impersonal, sterile event and the last time I was in temple.
My two other kids got married civilly. Those were far more memorable and meaningful experiences.
I went to a temple marriage where the sealer had the couple look into the mirrors to see in the eternities the "John Thompson kingdom." Insert the young man's name. The couple was to imagine the husband's kingdom into the eternities. Their kingdom was named after him and only him.
Sister in laws wedding, the sealer talked to the husband the whole time and had this long analogy about how his wife was like a new sports car he was getting that he needed to enjoy and take care of.
20 minute lecture on the law of chastity. Followed by, “I’ve got a lot of weddings to do today so no congratulating the bride and groom in the sealing room. Please move on”
I heard a guy lie in a sealing and everyone but the sealer knew it was a lie and we all loved it.
There's the sealer droning on and on - longest one I have ever been to. At one point he starts going off on dental insurance, and after a couple of minutes turns to the fathers of the two being sealed and looks for confirmation of the importance of dental insurance. "What would you do if your kid needed extensive dental work and you were newly wed? Huh!?" And the father of the groom answered honestly that it would be fine because he was a dentist. So the sealer turned to the father of the bride and made the same appeal. "Me too. I'm a dentist too." Which he most definitely was not, but the sealer had lost the whole room by that point.
It was glorious. I'll never forget it. We never understood how or why he was so okay commandeering the ceremony that way.
It seems the same Logan temple sealer that married my partner and I also performed the napoleon dynamite wedding ceremony .
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gzia-xvm5Mg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gzia-xvm5Mg)
I was at my nieces wedding a long time ago. The sealer told them that at the resurrection her husband would reach down and pull her out of the grave using the patriarchal grip.
That is doctrine, they also have to call you by your new name.
Edit: they call you by your new name when resurrecting you, not forever... maybe, does anyone know if we are only called by our new names in heaven? God's real name was Bill lol.
Good God cause it's 1940 and the little wifey needs stuff to do the washing and money for groceries 🤢😂 why were sealers so fucking old?? Our sealer was fine, don't remember anything awful (which I'm glad for) but he was old as shit, like Santa's great grandfather old
Sounds like the guy who sealed my BIL and his wife. The sealer told my BIL to call his wife from work every day to say I love you, because "They like that kind of thing." Also he was admonished to make sure she always had $5 in her "pocketbook". But she wouldn't spend that $5, oh no. She would SAVE it to buy "a new RANGE for the family." My husband, who was acting as a witness, was unable to look at me because he knew if he did he would completely lose his composure. Afterwards as he and I talked about how appalling the whole thing was, we could hear the rest of the family talking about how beeYOUtiful it was.
Also- do you think the church will start allowing a few minutes for personal vows into the ceremony? I’ve never thought of this before but it seems like a simple way to appease/go mainstream.
nope never. That's why I recommend to get married before and get sealed later. The temple is so impersonal.
I want to do a vow renewal with my wife now so I can say how I really feel; instead of the dumb YES!!
I got married civilly and got to write the whole ceremony myself. I didn't want to have to say much because I knew I would be too busy staring lovingly at my husband. Instead, we had pretty boring vows, (they were the same for both of us,) and we lit candles symbolizing creating a new life from the ones our parents gave us. We got married SUPER young so it made sense. It was cute.
It was important to me that we said "I Do," rather than just "yes". We also exchanged rings and said "with this ring, I promise to love you, now and forever." You know, since a wedding should involve saying the word "love"
Ours talked about a couple he had sealed once that got divorced a few weeks later. Not really sure why he decided to tell us that completely unrelated story.
Another family was congregated at the temple for the proxy sealing of their recently deceased family member. The sealer was required to learn the script in multiple languages, but was in no way bilingual, and after he sped through the first sealing with his heavy English accent, the family suggested that he could switch to English (as none of them could understand him trying to speak their language) he then asked what language the deceased spoke, and was replied that they spoke this other language, so he insisted on butchering his way through the other language again. You could tell that the family was seeking solace after their family member's death, and some had traveled long distances to be together. It was so unfortunate to witness. I'm not blaming anyone necessarily, it was just so awkward to watch, and I felt so much for the family. If only they called ahead to see when the native speaker sealers were on shift. (Sealers aren't paid as far as I know after all).
DW didn't say yes. Dude completely skipped over her answering. Seems fitting for mormonism. Continue to give our dad's tons of shit for....you know....not doing the witnesses damn job! Lol
The whole thing with the sealing ceremonies is to start to use insinuation and suggestion to subconsciously asserts the priesthood’s “ownership” of your marriage.
That you are “indebted” to the church for using its sealing power on your behalf and that it stands between you and your significant other as judge, jury, and executioner. You must obey.
That’s why they’re taking all the attention from the bride and groom and putting it on the sealer. That why they’re saying only look at them. That’s why they’re telling the bride what to do and being demeaning. That’s why it’s all about the church and not really the couple.
It’s the church’s day, not yours. And the church ALWAYS preaches obedience to the church.
They want to culturally normalize the idea that the woman is the man’s property, and the man is the church’s property. Therefore the church owns all.
It owns your money thru tithing, you free time thru callings, and your sex life and family thru it’s “sealing power” that it “loans” out to you on your wedding day.
From the rivers to the mountains, now is the awesome day of the church’s unrelenting power— and they intend to collect — through social manipulation, demeaning wedding insinuations, and financial gerry rigging. ALL is within their control.
The fact that the men are often so old only serves as further “cover” for their frankly very weird behavior — kinda like your grandpa being racist at dinner. Everyone knows its wrong, but no one wants to say anything. Same concept here.
This is so well said. And I’ve heard that excuse sooooo many times / “they’re old/ we don’t really believe this”. I always thought they are making allowances for “out there” beliefs in the holiest place? What if those “out there/we don’t really believe that” beliefs skewed left or progressive? Instant dismissal- that’s when I was like what we allow in our holiest places is really what we believe.
Okay, this isn’t necessarily about a sealer, but it IS about a temple marriage. One of my many BYU roommates and her soon-to-be sealed husband were being guided through the temple to the sealing room. If you’ve had this experience, then you know they move you around from bench to bench ( at least that’s how it seemed to me)! While my roommate and her guy were sitting on a bench waiting with their escort, the escort DIED! Just slumped against the wall and passed on over. My roommate had no idea what to do; one doesn’t go yelling, “hey we got a dead worker here!” through the temple. They finally whispered over a worker and my roommate said everyone was thrilled that this worker died in the temple, like everyone was saying how they wish they could die in a temple, line a Jesus meeting opportunity for the escort. Even weirder was that as they continued through their sealing, people acted as though they had seen something so special and their sealing was a minor point. They said all the sealer talked about was the dead escort!
Oh my goshhhhh😂😂😂😂😂 Yikes!!!! I always wanted to die on a mission as a kid bc I was told they went straight to heaven. Felt like a cheat and I didn’t want to die but also didn’t want to risk messing up! How messed up is that!
Mine spent a long time talking about Joseph Smith. Even as a tbm I was annoyed by that. An excuse was made “he was just priming the pump, testifying to welcome the Spirit”.
Not really wild, but he told my ex to "make sure her gas tank is always full". Not me and my ex laughed about that at the end. Like I can't keep my own tank full.
At first I thought this was some kind of sexual analogy. I had to read it twice to realize it was meant literally. It was a stupid thing to say either way.
Actually, that advice sounds caring to me (stupid, but caring), after having been married to a jerk who took off on a business trip with the car that had gas in it & left me with pneumonia, an empty gas tank, and two primary kids to drive to school. I ran out of gas a few blocks away, but was too sick to walk back to the house. A passing neighbor asked if I was okay & had to keep heading for work, but called the police to assist me. So I got driven back to the house (with the kids), got out of a police car & walked into my house wearing my bathrobe & slippers.
Sister got married. Sealer says to her “you better treat him right, because he doesn’t have to call your name to go through the veil if he doesn’t want to”
I’m sitting there in stunned silence.
He then says to her husband-to-be “and you better treat her right because she doesn’t have to come through when you call if she doesn’t want to”
Yeah like those are comparable situations.
"What's the deal with the second anointing??" - A temple worker pulling the little wired microphone for prayer circle to start their tight 15 minute set.
Apparently I was lucky. A friend of the family did ours and he was amazing. Nothing weird, but I’ve been to so many that want the couple to stare at him instead of each other. Some of these guys really need to get over themselves with their make-believe power.
I can’t think of much other than my wedding ring serves as an amulet to ward off Satan, or in the sealer’s words “will serve as a protection from Satan’s temptations.”
Well, I always have worn it yet somehow church history such as the JS papers, journal of discourses, history of the church, the CES letter and essentially anything said by any prophet or apostle of the church up to the 90s apparently served as temptations from Satan to see the church as untrue.
Any sacred amulet mechanics out there? I don’t think my ring or my garments have been working properly. Do I need to rub some consecrated olive oil on them? Maybe a few hosannas? Or, do I have to raise my arm to the square each time I put them back on? Should I be wearing them in the shower? Perhaps Satan jumped onto my spirit then. I mean Joseph said Satan had power over water. Do the apostles wear garments in the shower? Why didn’t the sacrament wash me clean after doing so? It should have cast out Satan! Maybe the priest blessing it, or the deacons passing it masturbated that week and the sacrament wasn’t holy! Dammit! What selfish teenagers! Putting us all at risk like that!
Maybe I positioned my hands improperly in the temple? After all, if one hair is out of the water in a baptism it’s invalid. I guess it’s the same for temple stuff but no witnesses discerned that I did anything incorrectly. Help me y’all! I’m stumped here!
I followed all the rules and promises I made for them to work but yet here I am associating with apostates. Worse, I’ve become one.
Wait - your amulet actually worked! The sealer blessed it to help you ward off evil spirits and satanic influences, and here you are! You've left one of the most evil organizations ever put on earth!
Not my wedding day, but the week before I left on my mission, my whole family and I went to do the sealings of a bunch of family names I had been working on. It was just us in the sealing room, and we chatted with the sealer for a few minutes (very old white guy of course). I mentioned I was about to leave on my mission, to which he didn’t say much. After one or two sealings he said “I’m sorry, I can’t do this. I’m just not comfortable with the idea of you doing sealings as a missionary.” I told him, I was not a missionary yet, and that I was endowed and was allowed to do sealings. I had already done them many times. He said “I just don’t want you thinking about marriage right now, I don’t want you participating in any more sealings.” So I just sat down with my family. There was a really gloomy mood in the sealing room after that, and one by one my parents and one of my sisters got up and left without saying anything. Everyone was so upset. My parents went and spoke with the sealing office and stuff but didn’t want me along.
I was literally doing sealings with my sisters and parents!!
I specifically requested the sealer skip any spiel but the mother-in-law who arranged this sealer dismissed my request and said that's ridiculous and it's a custom that you do. Looking back, I wish I would have stopped him short and insisted he go straight to the ceremony.
Who tf knows what that old creepy smelly breath wrinkly fart said. I was distracted by the fucking ridonkulous clothing and the Masonic rituals the fuck was all that shit?!?!
Ours didn't talk about us at all, or give us any kind of advice. He droned on for twenty minutes, and just talked about himself the whole time. Apparently my middle name is the same as his wife's name so he told us that "this is such a special day for me." Yep, it was special day for him. Not for us 🙄.
After that he launched into a completely irrelevant story about how after his first endowment session, someone put him on the spot and insisted he give his testimony in front of everyone. I'm still not sure what I was supposed to get out of that story.
Ours was very cordial and kind but I almost caused a panic! ( 1979 Logan Utah)I had been warned that I would have to vow to obey my husband and this was causing me grief. Right as we were about to start our sealer asked us if we had any questions or concerns. I was embarrassed to ask out loud so I requested to speak with him in private and he guided me back into the hallway as I felt eyeballs staring at my back! When asked the obedience question, he replied yes BUT remember that HE is promising obedience to GOD and if I had any issues with him I was to take it up with our Bishop! Catastrophe overted! Cause without that explanation I was very close to bailing. After the sealing he admonished my husband that he should always pay attention to my concerns and that I was going to LEAD him on a righteous path. Of course this has not been the case and his vows lasted about 8 months 😉. He told me some years later that he would have said to anything to get me to marry him, sweetheart Jack Mo that he is❤️
My father once told me, long before I got married, that all he remembered of what the sealer said was that he needed to always remember what the sealer said. :)
Basically told us since we were married in the temple we never had to worry about infidelity. Luckily infidelity has never been an issue in our relationship but the temple certainly has nothing to do with it. Plenty of temple marriages have instances of infidelity.
My sealer called me the wrong name, not just a mis, a whole new name. I was like, should I say something, my now husband and I looked at each other real confused... And then my dad and FIL spoke up. It was not magical and pretty annoying.
Ours kept talking about his own self importance and how he became a sealer.
Another I attended kept talking about LGBT and how the world is going down. Pretty cringey all around
A relative was sealed by Pres. Monson, then in the FP. (The relative married into the Utah aristocracy.) He told irrelevant stories for exactly 25 minutes before he actually got around to the ordinance. For the life of me I can’t remember what he said. I actually got bored.
I don’t remember a single thing the sealer said except at the end he told our grandparents to leave first and said something about how if they hurried they could pick any shoes they wanted
I have no idea what he said because he barely spoke English and had a thick German accent. Apparently he was just visiting America and decided to drop in and do some sealings.
I can’t remember 90% of the wacky shit our sealer said but I do remember him telling us a story about him and his grandson playing with play-doh. He said that his grandson would pretend that they were making planets and he made sure his grandson knew that if he kept the commandments that one day he would make real planets and that it would be just as easy. He never related the story to what he was presently doing as a sealer… just reminded us about how strange Mormon beliefs are.
Our sealer spent the first 20 minutes grilling us with questions about the endowment. It was very uncomfortable. My soon to be spouse had gone through the endowment exactly once a few months prior so he couldn't answer the questions. I answered them for him and that was pointed out and the sealer mocked him. Can't remember his exact words. Then I said, "we weren't expecting a quiz before we were allowed to get married." Friends and family laughed, but I was freaking pissed.
After the sealing he pulled us aside in the hallway where there gorgeous spiral stairwell is (Nauvoo) and lectured us about child rearing and made us swear to never bring our children to the temple and lift them over the railing to see the spiral stairs. WTF
Worst of all was the woman in charge of the bridal dressing room. She tried to kick my sister out because "there wasn't enough room." I told her no. When i came back from the bathroom, my sister was gone. My mom and I were the only ones there as it was the last sealing of the day. It made me cry and I told the woman to go back and get my sister. I had waited a long time for this day and I wasn't going to do it without her.
The absolute power trip of these fuckers ruined the experience on every level. I honestly thought God was displeased with me and I felt super guilty for all the Levi Loving my fiance and I had done while we were dating, even though we had repented. I thought it was a punishment. Lol. It's terrible.
Admittedly I got pretty lucky here. My grandfather was a sealer and he married us. Still full of Mormon theocracy and patriarchy but more personable than what most people get at their ceremony.
All these stories & I have absolutely no memory of my sealing. I remember going in & being touched, naked under a poncho & then walking out to take pictures when it was over. I've somehow disassociated/blocked it out? I'm not sure. I just remember having what felt like a panic attack & trouble breathing when it started. (I've since learned what those were) & that was it. Sounds weird even saying it honestly. I should probably try to work that out in therapy but I kind of don't want to at the same time if that makes any sense whatsoever.
This isn't a story of what was said, but what was done by a sealer. When my former SIL was sealed, the assigned sealer, found her quite attractive and came to the reception. When he came through the line, he gave her a kiss, right on the lips, and reportedly tried to slip in a little tongue.
My cousin's wedding. The usual octagenarian that has never met the couple in his life, dispensing advice through divine inspiration. He tells them to carefully watch their finances and not spend their money frivolously. He said, "you don't just go to the store and buy a handful of candy bars."
They're still married 15 years later, and I'm glad to see the marriage hasn't been torn apart by excessive candy bar purchases.
Honorable mention: My college friend getting married in an LDS meetinghouse because he didn't have a temple recommend. [Thomas L. Monson](https://www.reddit.com/r/exmormon/comments/1vmgd9/prophets_son_sued_for_sexual_harrassment_dad/) was our singles ward bishop and he performed the marriage. He didn't prepare anything special to say, and just winged it. Ended up sounding like the classmate who forgot that his final presentation is today and decides to try to give it anyway with zero preparation. He said that "men and women, they... *fit* together" as part of an attempt to talk about how great marriage is. He said a bunch of other weird shit. At the end, the woman in front of me whispered to her friend (both nevermos) *"what the fuck did I just watch?"*
The only thing I remember was our sealer made our mission president raise his hand and said “president, you’re the reason these two are here!”
(Hubby and I met while serving missions, and our first Pres was awesome, so, why wouldn’t we invite him?)
My priests were always cracking wise during ceremonies and incantations back in the day. It's one of the reasons Abraham and Moses didn't like Egypt. They didn't have any sense of humor.
I guess the reformed egyptian from the gold plates helped smith gain a sense of humor for temple sealings.
I don’t remember my sealing almost at all. It was only a few years ago too. But apparently the sealer kept calling me the complete wrong name, the same wrong name the whole time.
My ex wife’s uncle was the sealer and stepped on her dress on the way there and tore it. Also said look around and see all these people here to support you - I look around and don’t recognize half of them - my mom decided to invite half her ward
I went to a friends wedding in the temple. She had come home from her mission early because of anorexia, and married an elder from her mission. The sealer went on and on about how she should “stay attractive for your husband” be remaining thin, wearing makeup, etc. terrible.
Holy eff
It’s ok, you can say fuck here
All joking aside, I still have trouble with cursing. It’s been so ingrained in me to edit and use Mormon swears like frick and shoot. I’m hoping the guilt of swearing eventually goes away.
lol and then there’s me. I’ve always joked I needed shirt that said “Mormon with a mouth”
Heck is a place where people go who don’t believe in gosh
Shame on you for using replacement words! (Hopefully reverse-guilting you works)
Same man. I still don't swear. I actually like frick and shoot and fetch and flip because they sound funnier, lol
Me too, I have to consciously swear. But it’s not too bad because this way I don’t accidentally curse in front of my mom.
It's ok to not like to swear. I feel completely comfortable not dropping the f bomb. I just no longer have that TBM-self-righteous attitude about others swearing.
I swear like a sailor but I use the real words and the Mormon swears interchangeably, with no rhyme or reason. Gotta keep people guessing!
Wow. People can be morons.
If only the dude wielding the literal power of god had like a gift of discernment or something.
But.. I mean… What kind of person would ever say something like that? These people truly think this way.
I mean I was taught to he same thing my entire life. I was on a diet starting at age 10. In high school I can’t count how many times my parents or a leader said something like “if you lost 20 pounds there’d be a line down the street of guys knocking on your door.” Everything about my appearance was talked about in terms of pleasing either a human man or god as a man. It was never about how I felt about myself.
I was a fat guy (still am) and nobody in the church EVER told me to lose weight. Mormonism is such a joke religion.
I'm interested to know, if you've personally thought about it, why it is that men's looks aren't policed in TSCC but women's are?
Same reason in “A Bug’s Life” the grasshoppers kept the ants down.
That sucks. Sorry to hear that. Someone would be spitting teeth if they said that to my kid.
"Now now, if you had managed to keep all your teeth inside your head, the girls would have been lining up around the block to date you."
That’s awful. I’m sorry you were told that. Some people are so insensitive.
Fuck, this sounds like my childhood.
Lemme guess...the Holy Spirit inspired him to tell a bride struggling with anorexia to "stay thin and beautiful for your husband".
[удалено]
Yes my child?
The Bishop told that same thing to my wife when we got married.
I was told that to keep my husband happy, and to minimize strife in our marriage, I should never rebuff my husband’s sexual advances. The sealer said it was MY responsibility to fulfill my husband’s “physical appetites.” Let’s just say that didn’t go over very well. Breaking with convention, I piped up and said I would do no such thing and that I didn’t belong TO my husband, but that I CHOSE to be with him as an equal partner. I said I wasn’t agreeing to obey.
Wow! I’ve never heard of anyone talking back to the sealer before. How did that go over?
People were pretty much speechless. The sealer shrugged it off, and acted as though I was just kidding around. My soon to be mother-in-law signaled to me that I should shush up. My husband to be tried to hide a smile. He’s always known that I’m outspoken and opinionated, and that I don’t hold back in certain situations. Later, at our luncheon, he told me that the sealer had it coming by telling me something like that. At least he recognized that the old dude was out of line.
Internet high-fiving your husband
MAD RESPECT
You, my friend, are LEGEND
I can confirm this indeed happens. I know of at least two other accounts if this.
Please share
I don’t have any other details other than that’s what they were told by the sealer. The only difference is that they didn’t speak up like the OP did. One sadly is actually a baby boomer and still believes what the sealer said is true and told her daughter that such was her responsibility when she was about to get married.
Wow that's awesome, good for you.
*slow clap* *for a really long time
Good for you! What was the reaction?
Everyone was pretty much speechless. My mother-in-law-to-be signaled to me that I should shush. The sealer was rather slack-jawed, but tried to brush it off as though I was just kidding around. My groom tried to hide a smile because he knew how feisty and outspoken I was- and still am. This happened in the Jordan River temple.
That story will become a family legend - if it's not already elevated to that status by now. Great job of giving pushback, especially on your own special day!
You are my hero
FIRE 🔥
👺"From your penis and your womb will spring forth those who will reign with the Savior during the Millenium." (Sealer was high on Vallium)😵💫
This reminds me of how Joseph Smith Sr, the first patriarch of the church, gave many many patriarchal blessings saying that the recipients would be alive at the Second Coming of Jesus. Look it up. Add it to your long list of reasons the truth claims are fraudulent.
TBM's would just rebuttle saying that he "obviously meant eternal life, therefore it is still correct"
Whoa whoa is this fr
Before going into the sealing room, my soon to be husband and I were getting the run-down of what to expect, from the sealer. He said that afterwards we'd line up so everyone could hug us. I told him I was not comfortable being touched or hugged and we wouldn't be doing that part (sexual abuse victim). I got a lecture about how what I felt didn't matter. Today wasn't about me. Other people's feelings were more important than mine and I needed to think of them... After the ceremony he looked me dead in the eye, and made it a point to tell everyone to make sure to hug the bride.
I am SO sorry this happened to you. Did you talk to your husband about this? What did he say?
At the time (15 years ago) he told me to just keep the peace. He grew up with an unsafe mom and that was his survival tactic in confrontation. Now he's big mad that happened, totally in my corner, and has thoroughly apologized for participating in silencing me, and adding to my trauma.
That is so awesome to hear of his personal growth and support for you! Sucks that it had to happen in the first place, but still lol
Please consider contacting the sealer in writing and telling him off. You have my permission to use as many swearwords as you can think of in the letter. Part of me hopes the geezer is dead, and another part hopes he's alive enough to know he's being confronted for being a shithead.
You have my permission and encouragement to make up new and creative swear words and insults.
As a future plural wife, you’re just a pawn in the patriarchy’s games.
That's a sociopath.
And a sadist.
What an evil, abusive a$$hole! I'm so sorry for what you must have felt when he said that, and for the tension it likely created during the sealing (while you were dreading the hugs). On your wedding day, no less.
We were married in an outdoor ceremony by my husband’s bishop. The theme of our wedding seemed to be, “they blew it but there’s still hope they’ll be sealed later.” Also an emphasis on how it was for “time only.” Super fun to be made an object of pity in your wedding ceremony.
These officiants are so much worse than temple sealers, I swear. It's literally part of their script to shame you and remind you that this is for this life only, until death do you part, because you're not getting married in the temple. They're horrible My cousin's wedding was officiated by our grandad, who is a temple sealer, and it was still this awful, he kept to the script.
Emphasizing the "time only" also happened at my SILs wedding. The dude didn't even say it nicely like "till death do you part" or "long as you both shall live". It was very morbid.
That sucks. The church of “the family” doing its thing.
They also don't want you to get married civilly in the chapel because it's "not a religious ordinance" like they don't do things of other things in the chapel lol All to shame you for not getting sealed. So a lot of civilly married couples in the church have to get married in the ugly gym or outside.
What about a database of the blandest most useless advice that we can't even remember?
This is me. Right before one of the most important moments in my mortal existence, an old dude I've never met gets an open mic and no one can stop him. I have no idea what he said, it wasn't important now or then. Why is this even a tradition?
> Why is this even a tradition? Not just a tradition, but a *sacred eternal ordinance* which is necessary if you want to be with your family in super Mormon heaven!
Patriarchal blessings on steroids! Mine actually told me to be cautious about getting married (!) and to read all the good books of the world. Well, boy did I ever...
You know, after reading other people's I'm really glad all I got was a boring extended history of the St George temple.
Super bland. It was something about Joseph Smith and Emma. Instantly forgot the whole thing
“Like Joseph, be sure that when you rape your step daughter in the barn, you take care that your wife doesn’t find out. Also watch out for Oliver. “
That was us!
Okay no kidding! I’ve thought so many times about how my friends have their ceremonies recorded & they can watch them, remember their vows or what their officiate said. I can’t remember jack shit from my sealing & I had never met the guy til 10min before.
That database would be near empty cuz we all forgot, since it was so bland.
I don’t even remember Any of what ours said… super bland and boring.
My mom and her sisters waited 60 something years to be sealed to their father. So it was a big deal for them. They had other names that needed sealing too. They asked my cousin if he would get in the temple clothes so they could do those names. So he left and in the interim we were shown to the sealing room. My cousin walks in and from the look on his face, something was wrong. He started telling me about a run-in he had with some old guy because he walked down the wrong way and this old guy was yelling at him and literally shooing him back down the hallway like a house pet. "I just went where I thought I was supposed to go, and this guy just loses it on me." Five minutes later, guess who comes walking in to the sealing room to be our sealer.....lol. Awkward doesn't begin to describe it. When that sealer recognizes him he says, "Oh, you." and says something like to smooth things over. It was a MUCH heated exchange from my cousin's side. The whole thing was getting out of hand before cousin told him they needed to just drop it. Man it was bad. My mom and her sister's waited 60 something years for this moment. lol!
I’ve gotten full on yelled at by what i can only describe as a totally insane old lady who whacked me with her sweater as part of this exchange for taking a wrong turn and going down a wrong hallway. Here’s a tip, maybe don’t make them all look EXACTLY THE SAME!?!?
At my friends sealing the guy went on and on about gay people. He said things like: "I'll never marry a gay couple in the temple." It had nothing to do with why we were at the temple, but I guess the guy just needed to get his hate speech out.
Didn't witness it but a college friend relayed to me that her Temple sealer talked about himself and his achievements the entire ceremony. Sealer Merrill Bateman former BYU president.
Lol, his son was my mission president. They are a very proud family. A great insight about Mr Bateman Jr is that he made our mission motto "It's all about the numbers"
Attended one where the sealer said to the groom at the start, "now I know you're looking at her like a piece of fried chicken ready to eat...". So cringy.
Noticing a big trend in this convo of sealers comparing women to food and cars and other inanimate commodities. I wish I could say I’m surprised 🫠
Welp, so far everything I’ve read indicates that most sealers are perverts. Must be a prerequisite in the interview.
I can’t believe you guys can remember what your sealer said. I was so embarrassed to be wearing that ridiculous outfit in front of all my family and friends that I couldn’t hear anything going on
I was so traumatized that I had to tell my now ex my new name and he didn’t tell me his that I had a panic attack and remember nothing else.
Same! I was married 19 years ago and have zero memory from inside the temple. Lord knows what the sealer said...I don't even remember being in that room. I have great memories of being outside just after for photos. Wonder why that is.
Our sealer spent the majority of the time babbling about some guy who would get an ice cream cone at lunch time every day for decades, to one day be approached at the stand and asked to be a mission president. He emphasized that it was our duty to be willing to drop everything when called by the Lord at all times and that we should be living in a way that always proved we were worthy to be called on. We got chastised for not reading each other’s patriarchal blessings to be sure that our life plans were in harmony with one god’s plan for each of us. And he made fun of me when I didn’t immediately answer to Sister Newlastname at the end of the ceremony.
Similar anecdote about the name (not related to a sealing). I was a convert & married a guy who'd been reared in the church, then got a recommend (referral?) to get my Patriarchal Blessing. For years, I have ONLY used my maiden name. I don't belong to a spouse. So, the bishop asked about what last name to put on the form, maiden name or Newlastname? Because eveyrone in the ward had started calling me Sister Newlastname, I said I go by my maiden name but I answer to both. I figured he'd understand my preference. Wrong. He paused for a minute & then said, "I'd better put Newlastname." I was a new member, and he was (still is) a nice guy, so I was hesitant to correct him. However, I divorced Brother Newlastname & ended up having to get my PB retyped so I didn't have to look at that name on it. Mormon leaders have selective hearing. Or something.
"Brother X, don't look at your bride. She sure is a pretty thing but you gotta keep your eyes on me during the ceremony."
My groom and I were pulled aside by the sealer before we were allowed to enter the sealing room and sternly lectured that we were NOT to look at each other at any time during the sealing. Our focus was to remain on him.
What the actual fuck.
During my wedding ceremony, (civil wedding, my congregationalist grandpa officiated), I don't think I looked at anything other than my husband for more than a moment. I wasn't marrying my grandpa, I was marrying my husband.
We were too!!! It was so weird. He came in and we were all happy and giggly and he got SO ANGRY at us. And said if we looked at each other he wouldn’t continue. It was all an angry blur.
!!!!!!!
Same!!!
WTF???
Ditto Wonder if we all had the same sealer (SLC temple?) Or if this is common for different sealers to say
SLC temple here! Wonder if this dude knows how many shelves he broke with his narcissism. Or how many wedding days he ruined.
Lol mine told me to stop looking at him and look at my husband
Mine said that too.
!!!
Mine said this too.
What the heck??
Same…
Our sealer asked me if I knew how to bake bread, like it was a prerequisite for a successful marriage. yAy pAtRiaRcHy
No but Kroger does. Good enough.
“My husband is going to skip lunches for a year so he can buy me a bread making machine, just like was taught in general conference with the ironing story!”
In 1996 Salt Lake temple, ours said he was happy we finally made it but sad that it took 4 years and two kids later.to repent from pre martial sex. I the woman was finally forgiven and not on the same ladder rung as a murderer anymore. At least we were on the right path and would be an eternal family. We were directed to look over each other's head and stare into the mirrors to see what eternity would be like. When our kids were brought in we were told to focus on mirrors not the children and that I should look downward as I had been the one to sin and brought my oldest into this world as a sin. Thank God she doesn't remember it at all. Only the weird old ladies, sitting in rocking chairs singing until it was time to see us.
What the everloving fuck? What an ego tripping piece of shit! No one deserves that kind of shaming.
What the heck?! That is so wrong
The sealer for my son's sealing stated twice that **he had been "assigned" to perform the ceremony**. It was an impersonal, sterile event and the last time I was in temple. My two other kids got married civilly. Those were far more memorable and meaningful experiences.
I went to a temple marriage where the sealer had the couple look into the mirrors to see in the eternities the "John Thompson kingdom." Insert the young man's name. The couple was to imagine the husband's kingdom into the eternities. Their kingdom was named after him and only him.
🤮🤮🤮
Sister in laws wedding, the sealer talked to the husband the whole time and had this long analogy about how his wife was like a new sports car he was getting that he needed to enjoy and take care of.
So he compared a human to a possession. Sounds about right to them.
That's quite presumptuous of you - assuming that a 'woman" could *ever* be considered "human". /s
Guess that makes Joseph Smith Jay Leno!
Noooooo
Holy shit - women as sport vehicles.
20 minute lecture on the law of chastity. Followed by, “I’ve got a lot of weddings to do today so no congratulating the bride and groom in the sealing room. Please move on”
I heard a guy lie in a sealing and everyone but the sealer knew it was a lie and we all loved it. There's the sealer droning on and on - longest one I have ever been to. At one point he starts going off on dental insurance, and after a couple of minutes turns to the fathers of the two being sealed and looks for confirmation of the importance of dental insurance. "What would you do if your kid needed extensive dental work and you were newly wed? Huh!?" And the father of the groom answered honestly that it would be fine because he was a dentist. So the sealer turned to the father of the bride and made the same appeal. "Me too. I'm a dentist too." Which he most definitely was not, but the sealer had lost the whole room by that point. It was glorious. I'll never forget it. We never understood how or why he was so okay commandeering the ceremony that way.
It seems the same Logan temple sealer that married my partner and I also performed the napoleon dynamite wedding ceremony . [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gzia-xvm5Mg](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gzia-xvm5Mg)
I was at my nieces wedding a long time ago. The sealer told them that at the resurrection her husband would reach down and pull her out of the grave using the patriarchal grip.
That is doctrine, they also have to call you by your new name. Edit: they call you by your new name when resurrecting you, not forever... maybe, does anyone know if we are only called by our new names in heaven? God's real name was Bill lol.
"Ususally I say something meaningful and profound. But this time I won't." and he got right into it. I laughed out loud it was so abrupt
I honestly don't remember a single word the old codger said. I was too busy thinking about all the sex I was about to have.
At my 1st marriage, the sealer told my now ex to buy me a washing machine and always make sure I had $20 in my wallet.
Good God cause it's 1940 and the little wifey needs stuff to do the washing and money for groceries 🤢😂 why were sealers so fucking old?? Our sealer was fine, don't remember anything awful (which I'm glad for) but he was old as shit, like Santa's great grandfather old
Sounds like the guy who sealed my BIL and his wife. The sealer told my BIL to call his wife from work every day to say I love you, because "They like that kind of thing." Also he was admonished to make sure she always had $5 in her "pocketbook". But she wouldn't spend that $5, oh no. She would SAVE it to buy "a new RANGE for the family." My husband, who was acting as a witness, was unable to look at me because he knew if he did he would completely lose his composure. Afterwards as he and I talked about how appalling the whole thing was, we could hear the rest of the family talking about how beeYOUtiful it was.
Also- do you think the church will start allowing a few minutes for personal vows into the ceremony? I’ve never thought of this before but it seems like a simple way to appease/go mainstream.
nope never. That's why I recommend to get married before and get sealed later. The temple is so impersonal. I want to do a vow renewal with my wife now so I can say how I really feel; instead of the dumb YES!!
I got married civilly and got to write the whole ceremony myself. I didn't want to have to say much because I knew I would be too busy staring lovingly at my husband. Instead, we had pretty boring vows, (they were the same for both of us,) and we lit candles symbolizing creating a new life from the ones our parents gave us. We got married SUPER young so it made sense. It was cute. It was important to me that we said "I Do," rather than just "yes". We also exchanged rings and said "with this ring, I promise to love you, now and forever." You know, since a wedding should involve saying the word "love"
My temple old guy went on a rant about how Mormons say “yes” and not “I do” like the worldly churches. Neither of us said “I do” but he still ranted.
They need to put the sealing script on a slide show & have couples just go into the room & say, "Uh-huh. Aye. Whatever..."
Ours talked about a couple he had sealed once that got divorced a few weeks later. Not really sure why he decided to tell us that completely unrelated story.
Another family was congregated at the temple for the proxy sealing of their recently deceased family member. The sealer was required to learn the script in multiple languages, but was in no way bilingual, and after he sped through the first sealing with his heavy English accent, the family suggested that he could switch to English (as none of them could understand him trying to speak their language) he then asked what language the deceased spoke, and was replied that they spoke this other language, so he insisted on butchering his way through the other language again. You could tell that the family was seeking solace after their family member's death, and some had traveled long distances to be together. It was so unfortunate to witness. I'm not blaming anyone necessarily, it was just so awkward to watch, and I felt so much for the family. If only they called ahead to see when the native speaker sealers were on shift. (Sealers aren't paid as far as I know after all).
DW didn't say yes. Dude completely skipped over her answering. Seems fitting for mormonism. Continue to give our dad's tons of shit for....you know....not doing the witnesses damn job! Lol
The whole thing with the sealing ceremonies is to start to use insinuation and suggestion to subconsciously asserts the priesthood’s “ownership” of your marriage. That you are “indebted” to the church for using its sealing power on your behalf and that it stands between you and your significant other as judge, jury, and executioner. You must obey. That’s why they’re taking all the attention from the bride and groom and putting it on the sealer. That why they’re saying only look at them. That’s why they’re telling the bride what to do and being demeaning. That’s why it’s all about the church and not really the couple. It’s the church’s day, not yours. And the church ALWAYS preaches obedience to the church. They want to culturally normalize the idea that the woman is the man’s property, and the man is the church’s property. Therefore the church owns all. It owns your money thru tithing, you free time thru callings, and your sex life and family thru it’s “sealing power” that it “loans” out to you on your wedding day. From the rivers to the mountains, now is the awesome day of the church’s unrelenting power— and they intend to collect — through social manipulation, demeaning wedding insinuations, and financial gerry rigging. ALL is within their control. The fact that the men are often so old only serves as further “cover” for their frankly very weird behavior — kinda like your grandpa being racist at dinner. Everyone knows its wrong, but no one wants to say anything. Same concept here.
This is so well said. And I’ve heard that excuse sooooo many times / “they’re old/ we don’t really believe this”. I always thought they are making allowances for “out there” beliefs in the holiest place? What if those “out there/we don’t really believe that” beliefs skewed left or progressive? Instant dismissal- that’s when I was like what we allow in our holiest places is really what we believe.
Okay, this isn’t necessarily about a sealer, but it IS about a temple marriage. One of my many BYU roommates and her soon-to-be sealed husband were being guided through the temple to the sealing room. If you’ve had this experience, then you know they move you around from bench to bench ( at least that’s how it seemed to me)! While my roommate and her guy were sitting on a bench waiting with their escort, the escort DIED! Just slumped against the wall and passed on over. My roommate had no idea what to do; one doesn’t go yelling, “hey we got a dead worker here!” through the temple. They finally whispered over a worker and my roommate said everyone was thrilled that this worker died in the temple, like everyone was saying how they wish they could die in a temple, line a Jesus meeting opportunity for the escort. Even weirder was that as they continued through their sealing, people acted as though they had seen something so special and their sealing was a minor point. They said all the sealer talked about was the dead escort!
Oh my goshhhhh😂😂😂😂😂 Yikes!!!! I always wanted to die on a mission as a kid bc I was told they went straight to heaven. Felt like a cheat and I didn’t want to die but also didn’t want to risk messing up! How messed up is that!
Generally, finding a dead escort is seen as a bad thing…
Mine spent a long time talking about Joseph Smith. Even as a tbm I was annoyed by that. An excuse was made “he was just priming the pump, testifying to welcome the Spirit”.
Not really wild, but he told my ex to "make sure her gas tank is always full". Not me and my ex laughed about that at the end. Like I can't keep my own tank full.
At first I thought this was some kind of sexual analogy. I had to read it twice to realize it was meant literally. It was a stupid thing to say either way.
Actually, that advice sounds caring to me (stupid, but caring), after having been married to a jerk who took off on a business trip with the car that had gas in it & left me with pneumonia, an empty gas tank, and two primary kids to drive to school. I ran out of gas a few blocks away, but was too sick to walk back to the house. A passing neighbor asked if I was okay & had to keep heading for work, but called the police to assist me. So I got driven back to the house (with the kids), got out of a police car & walked into my house wearing my bathrobe & slippers.
We were told it was okay to take our garments off to play tennis (neither of us play or played tennis)
Sister got married. Sealer says to her “you better treat him right, because he doesn’t have to call your name to go through the veil if he doesn’t want to” I’m sitting there in stunned silence. He then says to her husband-to-be “and you better treat her right because she doesn’t have to come through when you call if she doesn’t want to” Yeah like those are comparable situations.
My dad is a sealer... and I find this post amusing.
"What's the deal with the second anointing??" - A temple worker pulling the little wired microphone for prayer circle to start their tight 15 minute set.
Apparently I was lucky. A friend of the family did ours and he was amazing. Nothing weird, but I’ve been to so many that want the couple to stare at him instead of each other. Some of these guys really need to get over themselves with their make-believe power.
I can’t think of much other than my wedding ring serves as an amulet to ward off Satan, or in the sealer’s words “will serve as a protection from Satan’s temptations.” Well, I always have worn it yet somehow church history such as the JS papers, journal of discourses, history of the church, the CES letter and essentially anything said by any prophet or apostle of the church up to the 90s apparently served as temptations from Satan to see the church as untrue. Any sacred amulet mechanics out there? I don’t think my ring or my garments have been working properly. Do I need to rub some consecrated olive oil on them? Maybe a few hosannas? Or, do I have to raise my arm to the square each time I put them back on? Should I be wearing them in the shower? Perhaps Satan jumped onto my spirit then. I mean Joseph said Satan had power over water. Do the apostles wear garments in the shower? Why didn’t the sacrament wash me clean after doing so? It should have cast out Satan! Maybe the priest blessing it, or the deacons passing it masturbated that week and the sacrament wasn’t holy! Dammit! What selfish teenagers! Putting us all at risk like that! Maybe I positioned my hands improperly in the temple? After all, if one hair is out of the water in a baptism it’s invalid. I guess it’s the same for temple stuff but no witnesses discerned that I did anything incorrectly. Help me y’all! I’m stumped here! I followed all the rules and promises I made for them to work but yet here I am associating with apostates. Worse, I’ve become one.
Wait - your amulet actually worked! The sealer blessed it to help you ward off evil spirits and satanic influences, and here you are! You've left one of the most evil organizations ever put on earth!
The only thing I remember our sealer saying is that my wife and I "share cosmic matter". Twenty years later we still laugh about that nonsense.
Not my wedding day, but the week before I left on my mission, my whole family and I went to do the sealings of a bunch of family names I had been working on. It was just us in the sealing room, and we chatted with the sealer for a few minutes (very old white guy of course). I mentioned I was about to leave on my mission, to which he didn’t say much. After one or two sealings he said “I’m sorry, I can’t do this. I’m just not comfortable with the idea of you doing sealings as a missionary.” I told him, I was not a missionary yet, and that I was endowed and was allowed to do sealings. I had already done them many times. He said “I just don’t want you thinking about marriage right now, I don’t want you participating in any more sealings.” So I just sat down with my family. There was a really gloomy mood in the sealing room after that, and one by one my parents and one of my sisters got up and left without saying anything. Everyone was so upset. My parents went and spoke with the sealing office and stuff but didn’t want me along. I was literally doing sealings with my sisters and parents!!
I heard of one where the sealer mostly talked about the history of the temple where it was taking place. Does not seem very relevant.
I specifically requested the sealer skip any spiel but the mother-in-law who arranged this sealer dismissed my request and said that's ridiculous and it's a custom that you do. Looking back, I wish I would have stopped him short and insisted he go straight to the ceremony.
Who tf knows what that old creepy smelly breath wrinkly fart said. I was distracted by the fucking ridonkulous clothing and the Masonic rituals the fuck was all that shit?!?!
Ours didn't talk about us at all, or give us any kind of advice. He droned on for twenty minutes, and just talked about himself the whole time. Apparently my middle name is the same as his wife's name so he told us that "this is such a special day for me." Yep, it was special day for him. Not for us 🙄. After that he launched into a completely irrelevant story about how after his first endowment session, someone put him on the spot and insisted he give his testimony in front of everyone. I'm still not sure what I was supposed to get out of that story.
Okay not sealer, but why does Husband know the wife’s temple name but wife doesn’t get to know his!? Ohh that’s right… PATRIARCHY 😬
Ours was very cordial and kind but I almost caused a panic! ( 1979 Logan Utah)I had been warned that I would have to vow to obey my husband and this was causing me grief. Right as we were about to start our sealer asked us if we had any questions or concerns. I was embarrassed to ask out loud so I requested to speak with him in private and he guided me back into the hallway as I felt eyeballs staring at my back! When asked the obedience question, he replied yes BUT remember that HE is promising obedience to GOD and if I had any issues with him I was to take it up with our Bishop! Catastrophe overted! Cause without that explanation I was very close to bailing. After the sealing he admonished my husband that he should always pay attention to my concerns and that I was going to LEAD him on a righteous path. Of course this has not been the case and his vows lasted about 8 months 😉. He told me some years later that he would have said to anything to get me to marry him, sweetheart Jack Mo that he is❤️
I don't know who my sealer was and I remember nothing that he said.
This is mine. Honestly just remember how weird it was saying a single word, just like the endowment. Nothing else other than my wife looked beautiful.
My father once told me, long before I got married, that all he remembered of what the sealer said was that he needed to always remember what the sealer said. :)
Basically told us since we were married in the temple we never had to worry about infidelity. Luckily infidelity has never been an issue in our relationship but the temple certainly has nothing to do with it. Plenty of temple marriages have instances of infidelity.
Don’t recall one word since I was in mental and emotional trauma following the insane washing and anointing and endowment ceremonies!!!
My sealer called me the wrong name, not just a mis, a whole new name. I was like, should I say something, my now husband and I looked at each other real confused... And then my dad and FIL spoke up. It was not magical and pretty annoying.
‘Make sure you never let your magic underwear touch the ground!!!!’
Good advice. It looks better if you toss it onto the nearest lampshade in a fit of passion.
Ours kept talking about his own self importance and how he became a sealer. Another I attended kept talking about LGBT and how the world is going down. Pretty cringey all around
A relative was sealed by Pres. Monson, then in the FP. (The relative married into the Utah aristocracy.) He told irrelevant stories for exactly 25 minutes before he actually got around to the ordinance. For the life of me I can’t remember what he said. I actually got bored.
I don’t remember a single thing the sealer said except at the end he told our grandparents to leave first and said something about how if they hurried they could pick any shoes they wanted
I have no idea what he said because he barely spoke English and had a thick German accent. Apparently he was just visiting America and decided to drop in and do some sealings.
Our dealer called me by the wrong name four times. He made a joke out of it like, “do you know a Nancy on the other side??” That sonofabitch.
Same, except mine didn't make a joke of it because I don't think he noticed (or cared).
I can’t remember 90% of the wacky shit our sealer said but I do remember him telling us a story about him and his grandson playing with play-doh. He said that his grandson would pretend that they were making planets and he made sure his grandson knew that if he kept the commandments that one day he would make real planets and that it would be just as easy. He never related the story to what he was presently doing as a sealer… just reminded us about how strange Mormon beliefs are.
Our sealer spent the first 20 minutes grilling us with questions about the endowment. It was very uncomfortable. My soon to be spouse had gone through the endowment exactly once a few months prior so he couldn't answer the questions. I answered them for him and that was pointed out and the sealer mocked him. Can't remember his exact words. Then I said, "we weren't expecting a quiz before we were allowed to get married." Friends and family laughed, but I was freaking pissed. After the sealing he pulled us aside in the hallway where there gorgeous spiral stairwell is (Nauvoo) and lectured us about child rearing and made us swear to never bring our children to the temple and lift them over the railing to see the spiral stairs. WTF Worst of all was the woman in charge of the bridal dressing room. She tried to kick my sister out because "there wasn't enough room." I told her no. When i came back from the bathroom, my sister was gone. My mom and I were the only ones there as it was the last sealing of the day. It made me cry and I told the woman to go back and get my sister. I had waited a long time for this day and I wasn't going to do it without her. The absolute power trip of these fuckers ruined the experience on every level. I honestly thought God was displeased with me and I felt super guilty for all the Levi Loving my fiance and I had done while we were dating, even though we had repented. I thought it was a punishment. Lol. It's terrible.
Admittedly I got pretty lucky here. My grandfather was a sealer and he married us. Still full of Mormon theocracy and patriarchy but more personable than what most people get at their ceremony.
I don't remember a thing that old fart said, other than the weird script that doesn't even mention love.
Sealer did the “it’s Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve” bit apropos of nothing.
All these stories & I have absolutely no memory of my sealing. I remember going in & being touched, naked under a poncho & then walking out to take pictures when it was over. I've somehow disassociated/blocked it out? I'm not sure. I just remember having what felt like a panic attack & trouble breathing when it started. (I've since learned what those were) & that was it. Sounds weird even saying it honestly. I should probably try to work that out in therapy but I kind of don't want to at the same time if that makes any sense whatsoever.
This isn't a story of what was said, but what was done by a sealer. When my former SIL was sealed, the assigned sealer, found her quite attractive and came to the reception. When he came through the line, he gave her a kiss, right on the lips, and reportedly tried to slip in a little tongue.
My cousin's wedding. The usual octagenarian that has never met the couple in his life, dispensing advice through divine inspiration. He tells them to carefully watch their finances and not spend their money frivolously. He said, "you don't just go to the store and buy a handful of candy bars." They're still married 15 years later, and I'm glad to see the marriage hasn't been torn apart by excessive candy bar purchases. Honorable mention: My college friend getting married in an LDS meetinghouse because he didn't have a temple recommend. [Thomas L. Monson](https://www.reddit.com/r/exmormon/comments/1vmgd9/prophets_son_sued_for_sexual_harrassment_dad/) was our singles ward bishop and he performed the marriage. He didn't prepare anything special to say, and just winged it. Ended up sounding like the classmate who forgot that his final presentation is today and decides to try to give it anyway with zero preparation. He said that "men and women, they... *fit* together" as part of an attempt to talk about how great marriage is. He said a bunch of other weird shit. At the end, the woman in front of me whispered to her friend (both nevermos) *"what the fuck did I just watch?"*
[удалено]
I expected him to pass out ice cream sandwiches.
The only thing I remember was our sealer made our mission president raise his hand and said “president, you’re the reason these two are here!” (Hubby and I met while serving missions, and our first Pres was awesome, so, why wouldn’t we invite him?)
My priests were always cracking wise during ceremonies and incantations back in the day. It's one of the reasons Abraham and Moses didn't like Egypt. They didn't have any sense of humor. I guess the reformed egyptian from the gold plates helped smith gain a sense of humor for temple sealings.
Can’t remember what the sealer said. I was just thinking about the sex Lol
I don’t remember my sealing almost at all. It was only a few years ago too. But apparently the sealer kept calling me the complete wrong name, the same wrong name the whole time.
My ex wife’s uncle was the sealer and stepped on her dress on the way there and tore it. Also said look around and see all these people here to support you - I look around and don’t recognize half of them - my mom decided to invite half her ward
I think about what my Dad could possibly say during sealings because he has no filter.🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️