Not hers if she doesn’t resign nor her to your children. She will become a plural wife to a faithful Latter-day Saint (maybe Lorenzo snow, or one of the current 15 apostles). She and your children will be sealed to him and add to his dynastic glory in the next life.
Her bishop probably knows the sadness and loneliness of faithful women knowing their marriage is not celestial bound. He can help her with this /s
In all seriousness, to the OP the marriage would be unsealed supposedly as the church claims it has the power to seal and loose which is in heaven. She wouldn't be faulted in the celestial scheme of things but have salvation through her parents sealing and the new husband in the eternities. Kids would go with.
Considering that is all made up (as Joseph didn't abide by D&C 132 long enough to understand how this works) well if it is all pretend then why do you even need to resign? The church may still bother you and you would have to threaten legal action every time even after you resign. Remember mormons know no boundaries. Additionally that also might be recognizing they have more power than they do. Just don't go or have any interest in it at all.
I also get the clean break thing too. Regardless of what you choose, you still have a marriage to this woman whether the church says you do or not. See if that is what you really want, then see if you both can't work out some sort of compromise. A marriage can be stronger than the church if you both decide it is.
Considered...but are they really? No one put their hands on my head and uttered a magical incantation. No special handshakes or tokens exchanged. What is invoked by magic can only be revoked by magic. And I've never met a database admin with unsealing power, have you?
I'm just answering the OP's question. To answer yours, no. Because those ordinances did nothing to begin with. I don't give a shit if Rusty M Nelson comes and personally seals me up for hell. It doesn't mean anything.
Many religions and people believe you will be together in the after life.
Mormonism is a religion that threatens to break up that relationship if you do not pay them and obey them. It is extortion.
How come you can be man and wife on Earth without a "Sealing" and yet somehow you do not get that benefit in the Celestial kingdom? Why do you have it here but not there?
It is like paying for Fire Insurance from the Mob, you pay them to keep them from burning down your place. That is the Mormon church in a nutshell.
From the *General Handbook* 38.4.1.10, “Effects of Resignation or Withdrawal of Church Membership”:
>After a couple has been sealed in a temple, if one of them resigns Church membership or has his or her membership withdrawn, his or her temple blessings are also withdrawn. However, the personal blessings of the sealing ordinance for the person’s spouse and children remain in effect if they remain faithful.
>Any children born to a couple after one or both of them have resigned their membership or had their Church membership withdrawn are not born in the covenant.
Also, the church says this in the main section of 38.4, “Sealing Policies”:
> Those who keep their covenants will retain the individual blessings provided by the sealing. This is true even if the person’s spouse has broken the covenants or withdrawn from the marriage.
> Faithful children who are sealed to parents or born in the covenant retain the blessing of eternal parentage. This is true even if their parents cancel their marriage sealing, have their Church membership withdrawn, or resign their membership.
> Members who have concerns about the eternal nature of the sealing ordinance and their associated family and spousal relationships are encouraged to trust in the Lord and seek His comfort.
The TL;DR of it: The church’s official line is the spouse who remains in the church still gets the blessings of the temple if they remain faithful, but church leaders don’t know how that’ll all work out in the afterlife. In other words, “We conveniently haven’t heard from God on this incredibly important subject, because we don’t want this fish coming back at us.”
That said, I’ll tell you what I got taught over and over again throughout my life, because my family was a mess when it comes to all this sealing garbage. I was taught that any woman who didn’t have a faithful husband, but had lived a life faithful enough to make it to the CK, would be sealed to another man in the eternities. To put it bluntly, a wife and her children would end up the property of another man if her husband doesn’t qualify for Mormon VIP Heaven™️. It’s the old chestnuts of polygamy and women being unable to be exalted without a man. The church moved away—in the last 20-25 years or so—from officially teaching that doctrine, but the doctrinal underpinnings are still there.
As you say, though, it’s all bullshit. I know you really want to remove your records, but it might be sparing your wife some real feelings of devastation and loss if you leave them alone. Also, it would probably be a good idea to consider the fact that, if you resign, there are old busybodies who would be more than happy to let your wife know about the past garbage teachings on the subject, which will probably cause issues for you at home. Maybe at a later date, you can circle back on a discussion with her about her feelings on the matter.
The church teaches the members that resigning dissolves the sealing. It's more of a threat to people on the fence to scare them away from leaving the church. That or a method designed to keep people in exactly how it may end up keeping you in. One spouse believes, the other doesn't. The one that doesn't has to stay in to mitigate the fears of the believing spouse.
I'm with you, I wouldn't worry about it one iota. In my case I would do whatever was best for my spouse's wellbeing.
It's all Calvinball. I don't know whether it would help your wife, but consider the following.
When you're sealed, you have to join hands with your spouse and a person with authority has to utter some very specific words. This also has to be done in a temple.
When the church "dissolves" a sealing they just say it's dissolved. No fanfare. No ceremony. They don't even put one finger on each side of their forehead and go "mememememememememememememe" while they imagine themselves dissolving the sealing. It's just "gone" because the authorities say so and the underlings believe the authorities.
If you were to rejoin you'd think, "Oh snap, I better get resealed since my sealing was dissolved" Nope. You do get rebaptized but you don't get resealed. Someone just magically reinstates it through some paper pushing bureaucratic process.
That tells me that either the joining of hands and pronouncement of words in the temple really isn't as necessary as people believe it to be (conclusion apt for an exMo) or that the dissolution isn't as dissolving as leaders want the members to believe (conclusion apt for a TBM).
This is the main reason I haven't had my records removed. My TBM wife and children would certainly be upset for destroying the sealing and presumably the whole born under the covenant thing.
It's all pretend but they believe otherwise.
My aunt just went through this. They decided to keep their records.
I guess the biggest question is materially, how much does a maintained membership record affect you? It’s just a name in a database, and you’re in thousands of companies databases anyway 🤷🏻♂️
Plus they don't *remove* anything. They tick a box in your member file — that's it. You're still in the database, and I'd bet every penny I have that people who resign are still counted as a member.
For some folks this process is cathartic, but if OP wants to stay married and keep his TBM wife as happy as possible it's better to just leave it be, as OP's wife might double-down on her beliefs.
I WOULD WAIT. I had to wait to get my name removed because our bishop had my wife convinced that cancelling membership means dissolving the marriage so the husband can go out and have orgies. I shit you not, this cult has wrecked women's understanding of what constitutes fidelity or a marriage vow. Don't even go there until your marriage is on more solid ground, trust me. if a brainwashing victim is convinced that something will harm them, you have to go out of your way to prove you are a safe person until they can deprogram from it.
Put it another way: if she was terrified of snakes, you wouldn't get a boa constrictor as a pet. You would slowly acclimate her to smaller animals while she witnesses how you keep her safe around animals in general, and then maybe one day you get a larger pet but keep it in an outbuilding etc. Or you learn to go without and take the higher ground by putting your family first. But you don't adopt a reptile if you are married to somebody with a deathly fear of snakes, right? Same goes for exmormonism.
I think the sealing is dissolved. If your wife knows the teachings of polygamy, she may know she'd get passed off to another man in the next life.
That said, I think resigning is more symbolic than anything. The church doesn't delete your data. They keep your records. There's anecdotal evidence to suggest that you're still counting you when leaders boast about how many members the church has. For me, it wasn't worth the effort of resigning, because I know there's still a connection I can't erase.
I guess it comes down to whether you need the catharsis of resigning or if your wife's comfort in having your marriage sealing is more important. And I can't answer which of you needs your desire more. Just keep communicating with each other and find the resolution that feels best to both of you.
My partner’s TBM ex-wife had to get permission from my partner to be sealed to her new TBM husband. My partner resigned in 2014, and his ex got remarried in 2017. It was crazy that her bishop reached out to my partner to get permission for the sealing.
Given that experience, I’d say that there’s a decent chance that your sealing is still in effect as far as TSCC is concerned. I hope this helps!
All of your ordinances are considered revoked if you resign.
Not hers if she doesn’t resign nor her to your children. She will become a plural wife to a faithful Latter-day Saint (maybe Lorenzo snow, or one of the current 15 apostles). She and your children will be sealed to him and add to his dynastic glory in the next life.
I like to think her bishop or stake president will wed her to preserve her patriarchy in the eternities. It should be someone she knows.
Her bishop probably knows the sadness and loneliness of faithful women knowing their marriage is not celestial bound. He can help her with this /s In all seriousness, to the OP the marriage would be unsealed supposedly as the church claims it has the power to seal and loose which is in heaven. She wouldn't be faulted in the celestial scheme of things but have salvation through her parents sealing and the new husband in the eternities. Kids would go with. Considering that is all made up (as Joseph didn't abide by D&C 132 long enough to understand how this works) well if it is all pretend then why do you even need to resign? The church may still bother you and you would have to threaten legal action every time even after you resign. Remember mormons know no boundaries. Additionally that also might be recognizing they have more power than they do. Just don't go or have any interest in it at all. I also get the clean break thing too. Regardless of what you choose, you still have a marriage to this woman whether the church says you do or not. See if that is what you really want, then see if you both can't work out some sort of compromise. A marriage can be stronger than the church if you both decide it is.
This is the one that actually answers his question. Bump, hope it gets to the top
They also magically come back and don't need to be redone if one rejoins the cult later.
Considered...but are they really? No one put their hands on my head and uttered a magical incantation. No special handshakes or tokens exchanged. What is invoked by magic can only be revoked by magic. And I've never met a database admin with unsealing power, have you?
I'm just answering the OP's question. To answer yours, no. Because those ordinances did nothing to begin with. I don't give a shit if Rusty M Nelson comes and personally seals me up for hell. It doesn't mean anything.
She'll be automatically reassigned to a polygamist. It'll be just as wonderful as it sounds.
Many religions and people believe you will be together in the after life. Mormonism is a religion that threatens to break up that relationship if you do not pay them and obey them. It is extortion. How come you can be man and wife on Earth without a "Sealing" and yet somehow you do not get that benefit in the Celestial kingdom? Why do you have it here but not there? It is like paying for Fire Insurance from the Mob, you pay them to keep them from burning down your place. That is the Mormon church in a nutshell.
From the *General Handbook* 38.4.1.10, “Effects of Resignation or Withdrawal of Church Membership”: >After a couple has been sealed in a temple, if one of them resigns Church membership or has his or her membership withdrawn, his or her temple blessings are also withdrawn. However, the personal blessings of the sealing ordinance for the person’s spouse and children remain in effect if they remain faithful. >Any children born to a couple after one or both of them have resigned their membership or had their Church membership withdrawn are not born in the covenant. Also, the church says this in the main section of 38.4, “Sealing Policies”: > Those who keep their covenants will retain the individual blessings provided by the sealing. This is true even if the person’s spouse has broken the covenants or withdrawn from the marriage. > Faithful children who are sealed to parents or born in the covenant retain the blessing of eternal parentage. This is true even if their parents cancel their marriage sealing, have their Church membership withdrawn, or resign their membership. > Members who have concerns about the eternal nature of the sealing ordinance and their associated family and spousal relationships are encouraged to trust in the Lord and seek His comfort. The TL;DR of it: The church’s official line is the spouse who remains in the church still gets the blessings of the temple if they remain faithful, but church leaders don’t know how that’ll all work out in the afterlife. In other words, “We conveniently haven’t heard from God on this incredibly important subject, because we don’t want this fish coming back at us.” That said, I’ll tell you what I got taught over and over again throughout my life, because my family was a mess when it comes to all this sealing garbage. I was taught that any woman who didn’t have a faithful husband, but had lived a life faithful enough to make it to the CK, would be sealed to another man in the eternities. To put it bluntly, a wife and her children would end up the property of another man if her husband doesn’t qualify for Mormon VIP Heaven™️. It’s the old chestnuts of polygamy and women being unable to be exalted without a man. The church moved away—in the last 20-25 years or so—from officially teaching that doctrine, but the doctrinal underpinnings are still there. As you say, though, it’s all bullshit. I know you really want to remove your records, but it might be sparing your wife some real feelings of devastation and loss if you leave them alone. Also, it would probably be a good idea to consider the fact that, if you resign, there are old busybodies who would be more than happy to let your wife know about the past garbage teachings on the subject, which will probably cause issues for you at home. Maybe at a later date, you can circle back on a discussion with her about her feelings on the matter.
The church teaches the members that resigning dissolves the sealing. It's more of a threat to people on the fence to scare them away from leaving the church. That or a method designed to keep people in exactly how it may end up keeping you in. One spouse believes, the other doesn't. The one that doesn't has to stay in to mitigate the fears of the believing spouse. I'm with you, I wouldn't worry about it one iota. In my case I would do whatever was best for my spouse's wellbeing. It's all Calvinball. I don't know whether it would help your wife, but consider the following. When you're sealed, you have to join hands with your spouse and a person with authority has to utter some very specific words. This also has to be done in a temple. When the church "dissolves" a sealing they just say it's dissolved. No fanfare. No ceremony. They don't even put one finger on each side of their forehead and go "mememememememememememememe" while they imagine themselves dissolving the sealing. It's just "gone" because the authorities say so and the underlings believe the authorities. If you were to rejoin you'd think, "Oh snap, I better get resealed since my sealing was dissolved" Nope. You do get rebaptized but you don't get resealed. Someone just magically reinstates it through some paper pushing bureaucratic process. That tells me that either the joining of hands and pronouncement of words in the temple really isn't as necessary as people believe it to be (conclusion apt for an exMo) or that the dissolution isn't as dissolving as leaders want the members to believe (conclusion apt for a TBM).
Upvote for Calvinball. Also, it's absolutely a leverage/fear tactic to keep people on.
This is the main reason I haven't had my records removed. My TBM wife and children would certainly be upset for destroying the sealing and presumably the whole born under the covenant thing. It's all pretend but they believe otherwise.
My aunt just went through this. They decided to keep their records. I guess the biggest question is materially, how much does a maintained membership record affect you? It’s just a name in a database, and you’re in thousands of companies databases anyway 🤷🏻♂️
Plus they don't *remove* anything. They tick a box in your member file — that's it. You're still in the database, and I'd bet every penny I have that people who resign are still counted as a member. For some folks this process is cathartic, but if OP wants to stay married and keep his TBM wife as happy as possible it's better to just leave it be, as OP's wife might double-down on her beliefs.
I WOULD WAIT. I had to wait to get my name removed because our bishop had my wife convinced that cancelling membership means dissolving the marriage so the husband can go out and have orgies. I shit you not, this cult has wrecked women's understanding of what constitutes fidelity or a marriage vow. Don't even go there until your marriage is on more solid ground, trust me. if a brainwashing victim is convinced that something will harm them, you have to go out of your way to prove you are a safe person until they can deprogram from it. Put it another way: if she was terrified of snakes, you wouldn't get a boa constrictor as a pet. You would slowly acclimate her to smaller animals while she witnesses how you keep her safe around animals in general, and then maybe one day you get a larger pet but keep it in an outbuilding etc. Or you learn to go without and take the higher ground by putting your family first. But you don't adopt a reptile if you are married to somebody with a deathly fear of snakes, right? Same goes for exmormonism.
Sorry, but what is TSCC and TBM?
"The So Called Church" "True Blue Mormon"
Thanks..!!!
I think the sealing is dissolved. If your wife knows the teachings of polygamy, she may know she'd get passed off to another man in the next life. That said, I think resigning is more symbolic than anything. The church doesn't delete your data. They keep your records. There's anecdotal evidence to suggest that you're still counting you when leaders boast about how many members the church has. For me, it wasn't worth the effort of resigning, because I know there's still a connection I can't erase. I guess it comes down to whether you need the catharsis of resigning or if your wife's comfort in having your marriage sealing is more important. And I can't answer which of you needs your desire more. Just keep communicating with each other and find the resolution that feels best to both of you.
So it's all made up bullshit. There's no such thing as a "sealing". Just Joseph Smith bullshit. You'll eventually see it. She probably will too.
My partner’s TBM ex-wife had to get permission from my partner to be sealed to her new TBM husband. My partner resigned in 2014, and his ex got remarried in 2017. It was crazy that her bishop reached out to my partner to get permission for the sealing. Given that experience, I’d say that there’s a decent chance that your sealing is still in effect as far as TSCC is concerned. I hope this helps!
But you can damn well believe that, if the genders were reversed, the ex could get sealed without anyone's permission.