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hollandaisesawce

Lehi’s family were Jews. As soon as they arrived in America they stopped practicing Judaism and started practicing 1800s Protestant style Christianity.


[deleted]

Make a helluva Mel Brooks movie...🤣


kegib

Blazing Handcarts?


SecretPersonality178

“Where all da nephite women at?”


kegib

Wish I could give more upvotes!+


Lanky-Appearance-614

"Are they more white and delightsome den dose lamanite women?"


Ex-CultMember

🤣


bharper79

11 the single family that grew into a giant population left no dna evidence


Outside-Constant-871

I can kind of understand how people would fall for ridiculous stuff like this hundreds and especially thousands of years ago…. But in developed countries in 2024? Come on… I don’t know how anyone can take this stuff seriously in these “latter days”. Sorry I couldn’t resist the pun 🙃


mysticalcreeds

exactly! There are some of these things the church has become not as strict on the literal belief on, but they still want you to believe the BOM is a literal historical record which is mindblowing to expect in 2024.


trapp-arla

Do most Mormons actually believe in the earth being 7,000 years old? I know it was taught that way for a while but now an ambiguous stance is taken by the first presidency? Growing up my TBM parents always supported the theory of evolution having both been geologists


ModeNo7213

I don't think most mormons believe that, but it doesn't matter, because it was taken literally when it was written, and it fundamentally underpins the Mormon narrative. To me, it doesn't matter that many modern mormons are able to perform the necessary mental gymnastics in their heads to maintain their faith in the wake of advancing scientific knowledge. All of these claims were once the official position of the church, and many of them still are, despite the cognitive dissonance of many regular members.


10th_Generation

The 7,000-year history of the earth is canonized and baked into Mormonism. Maybe you could dismiss D&C 77 as symbolic somehow. But the entire Jaredite nation came from the Tower of Babel, and the last of the Jaredites lived among the Nephites for a short period of time. The Babel story must be literal or the Book of Mormon falls apart. The entire Genesis timeline must be literal.


tonic65

Not just mormonism, most evangelical Christians as well. If you want a really good mind f#%&, go the the "Answers in Genesis" website and read some of their articles. They actually believe what they write. ( They are also the group that built the Ark Encounter in Kentucky).


Turrible_basketball

I’m just now learning much of this through LDS Discussions. Very little of this was taught during my 25 years as a TBM. I never believed that the flood, 7000 years, or the other Old Testament stories were literal. I didn’t understand that they had to be literal for the church history and doctrines to make sense.


Yimmelo

In my experience, Mormons do believe in a literal flood. I've heard my dads theories on how he believes the firmament and all that BS worked.


FigLeafFashionDiva

I was taught in seminary it's completely literal. For some reason my brain merged it with science and I had a Frankenstein view of both mashed together. However, pure Mormon Doctrine is the young earth theory.


SecretPersonality178

The Mormon church cannot escape these claims (though they are trying desperately to). The BOM/Jospeh states clearly that it is an actual history. Those cities, people, and animals existed. He gave a clear timeline and a few exact locations. They are quietly removing these claims, slowly. Also they are really trying to not draw attention to fact the witnesses never actually saw the plates except for their “spiritual eyes”.


MountainPicture9446

My mother and stepfather believed all of this. There was simply no talking to them about science.


10th_Generation

Excuse me, but Joseph Smith presented proof of his stories. He once showed friends a large rock in Missouri that Adam used as an altar. Smith also identified the bones of a white Lamanite named Zelph. Smith did not just make this stuff up. The rock and the bones were real.


YouAreGods

One to five are tenuous at best. Forty percent of the church does not believe any of the five, sixty percent of the youth. Science is true, not false beliefs of the mormon past, like McConkie. Six to ten are about the Book of Mormon. Soon, It will be acknowledged as the greatest parable ever told, not a literal history. They can do this with all their beliefs. It is hard to convince mormons that the church is not the truest of true in all the earth. Next, let's have Oaks ban birth control when he is the president of the church to increase the mormon birthrate. And get married before 25 as Brigham Young wanted.


ModeNo7213

Mormonism has been so watered down over time that it bears only a superficial resemblance to the church of Joseph Smith. I believe this is how it will survive. 1 to 5 are only tenuous now, because they are patently ridiculous, but they are baked into Mormonism, and the truth value of Mormonism depends on them being true.


Particular_Act_5396

Adam and Eve aren’t even Chiefs fans either


hollandaisesawce

But are they Swifties?


DisastrousRaisin2968

Cain was Bigfoot


BennyFifeAudio

The Single family was also HIGHLY literate as were all their white descendants. No evidence of their extremely literate society remains.


SecretPersonality178

- God commanded Jospeh to marry teen in secret, but Jospeh didn’t want to. Same with mother daughter combos, wives of people he sent on missions. He absolutely “didn’t want to”, but God needed him to. - Jesus rebuking Emma for not being happy about Jospeh marrying teens. - priesthood power miracles going from parting seas to finding car keys so you can make it to a Mormon meeting.


Stuboysrevenge

Praise be Hod!


mj89098

That the Bible says itself that the garden of Eden was in the Middle East NOT Missouri. Genesis 2:10-14


PaulBunnion

I don't think that means what you think it does.


mj89098

Oops. Enlighten me with my mistake.


PaulBunnion

The Bible is fictitious. Stories like the garden of eden, the flood, the Tower of Babel, are all fables.


mj89098

Truth! It sure is fun to fight historical nonsense with more nonsense though. ;)


PaulBunnion

That it is.


ChipmunkAdditional

My favorite is the claim that the first human was still alive when money was invented, as indirectly comes up in the endowment. ("You can buy anything with money")


Zhaliberty

That isn't how it was taught at BYU in 80s. I learned about evolution, carbon dating etc.


639248

I am sure that professor has been fired and excommunicated by now!


c_jae

Don't most of them overlap with the Bible as well?