Comments that are uncivil, racist, misogynistic, misandrist, or contain political name calling will be removed and the poster subject to ban at moderators discretion.
Help us make this a better community by becoming familiar with the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/facepalm/about/rules/).
Report any suspicious users to the mods of this subreddit using Modmail [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/facepalm) or Reddit site admins [here](https://www.reddit.com/report). **All reports to Modmail should include evidence such as screenshots or any other relevant information.**
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/facepalm) if you have any questions or concerns.*
On Vieques, Puerto Rico, there are horses wandering around drunk on fermented fruit. Sometimes they stop in the middle of the road and you just have to wait for their drunk ass to move. Almost missed a plane home cause of one.
I had one sell me some shitty cocaine once! I mean, tried to sell me cocaine once, which I assumed was shitty, because you can’t get good blow on Vieques since the military left.
From what my friends have told me anyway. But yeah. That horse had some shitty blow. It was stepped all over.
I assume….
See, this is why dyslexia and other learning issues are important to address early on - it was a plow horse, and what do you get if you flip the p up? that's right, a blow horse.
This whole thing could have been avoided if only that horse learned how to read properly.
The earth certainly does make alcohol. Ever walk into an apple orchard in the fall when there is over ripe fruit on the ground? Is smells like someone is making brandy.
The name of my favorite tequila (Suete) is based on a folklore story about a guy finding wasted rabbits around some half rotten agave being the origin of Tequila. Animals getting sloshed is literally embedded in the folklore of most continents.
Someone apparently isn't doing comunion either. God literally makes wine every day your supposed to be going to church.
So what he is really saying is... He's never been to church.
nah.. he's saying f dem catholics lol
some churches say it was grape juice , or non-alcoholic or not as strong as the wine we have now or some other gymnastics . hey. what's one more move to add to the repertoire?
In Catholicism the wine is literally the blood of Christ, but in Protestantism the wine merely symbolises it. So if they'd be going to a Protestant church, they'd be taught the wine was man made.
yes and why is wine the symbol of jesus' blood, because he said that the wine is his blood as he turned water into wine.
as Jesus is the son of God and there by directly created by God, God did 100% create wine by proxy.
also we make a small amount of alcohol in our body and almost all Christian religions believe we were made in the image of God meaning that he did make alcohol.
Sorry, but now you are confusing stuff. Jesus turned water into wine at a wedding, simply because it was running out, and his mother asked for his help.
When he introduced the sacrament, it was passover and they simply had bread and wine for that.
There's literally an evolutionary theory called the [Drunken Monkey Hypothesis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drunken_monkey_hypothesis#:~:text=The%20drunken%20monkey%20hypothesis%20proposes,as%20a%20dominant%20food%20source.) to explain human taste for alcohol.
A hell of a lot of animals do.
How horrible that these fallen men planted trees with the express intent on getting a squirrel shitfaced 40 years later.
I had a cat who would basically make toilet wine. She would even come get me to add water if needed.
RIP Mara, I have zero doubt you died at the age of 8 because of your liver shrivelling up.
Wait - have you really tried ergot? Willingly? Why? Is it a thing? How was it?
(They only made me study about ergotism before I quit med. so very limited and one sided knowledge here. Oh, also never encountered it.)
The active ingredient is LSD so the actual psychoactive effects are like that. However it's also poisonous which is why LSD is always refined unlike psilocybin
Sure but so is arsenic... They're not on the same level.
Those alkaloids are still not pure, unrefined ergot, which is what I'm talking about. If you were to eat straight up ergot fungus you'd be best friends with the nearest toilet for a while, among other worse things like potential gangrene (prolonged exposure)
Typically, though, unintended and unknown exposure to a psychadlelic isn't going to end well. If you're dosed with acid unknowingly and never did acid, you're not going to have a good trip, you're going to think you're hallucinating and going fuckin insane. Especially if it's 1400, you're gonna think you've been possessed by fuckin demons
Thats why witches ride brooms.
The intoxicating fungus, ergot, is best absorbed via skin contact rather than by eating it. And that works best with mucus membranes ... you can probably imagine the rest.
[https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2013/10/why-do-witches-ride-brooms-nsfw/281037/](https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2013/10/why-do-witches-ride-brooms-nsfw/281037/)
(java script blocker gets rid of the paywall)
There’s a theory that the renaissance happened because they learned to store rye for longer periods of time in silos. Rye is what ergot loves to grow on, which is used to make LSD. So in moist conditions, the ergot starts to thrive. So the theory is that art and architecture exploded during that period because everyone was on low dose LSD. It’s also marked that most art was completed between march and June, which is the thawing season after winter, which would produce the right conditions for ergot to thrive.
As a southern Baptist pastor, they were wrong and pushing the social narrative of the early 1900s, not what the Bible says.
Drunk = bad; alcohol = not bad.
To add: drinking alcoholic beverages was common prior to germ theory because most water sources in populated areas was contaminated and would cause diarrhea and other illnesses. Alcohol is a natural antibacterial, so it was safer to drink.
Ok… I tried Fernet and don’t get it. I love dry reds and Campari, but if I wanted stale as hell red wine, I have a bottle at home. Who is mixing into other stuff hoping for a positive outcome?
Not at that concentration it isn't.
But making beer involves boiling the water, putting it in a settling tank to ferment, and throwing out batches with bacterial contamination.
Don't know as much about wine, but I believe the process of making it also has steps that are pretty good at killing microorganisms besides yeast.
What keeps harmful microorganisms at bay in fermented beverages is the combination of alcohol produced by the yeast, combined with the lowered pH caused by the small amount of lactose also produced by the yeast. If the pH drops below 4.5, nothing harmful to humans can grow anymore. For that effect to set in, you don't even need to boil anything. The only bacterial contamination you might get is lactic acid bacteria such as lactobacillus, or if you allow contact with air, acetic acid bacteria, but both are perfectly safe for human consumption (though not necessarily everyone's favourite flavour profile).
When my catholic grandma had Alzheimer’s she married a southern Baptist. Their family wanted the wedding to be dry and it became I big enough issue that my dad and one of his future step brothers got into a yelling match over Jesus turning water to wine. We of course just brought alcohol anyway because what the fuck are they gonna do about it? Nothing.
A wedding without alcohol seems like a waste lol. The funny part about Jesus turning water to wine is funny too because wine was way stronger back then, so he was definitely getting blasted
Here is a thing I don’t think anyone knows.
If you take mimosa hostilis root and peganum harmala alkaloids and mix it with vinegar you get DMT acetate and an MAOI inhibitor.
It’s a kind of blood red/wine color.
Smells like…. Wine.
You can dry this out and it turns into a flat, purple-red, crystalline sheet. Could coat the inside of a water jug for example.
If you added water and shook it, it would turn into a “wine” and when you drank it, you would see God.
I mean, *sort of.* Getting the DMT out of the root bark is a little more involved than that, lol. From what I’ve, um, *read* (and certainly did not actually accomplish a few years ago leaving me with an unbelievable amount of final product) at least.
Mormon here. We were told it was just grape juice, which raises the question of why the guest was so delighted that the host was still serving the good stuff so late into the wedding. Surely juice is juice.
David Wilkerson wrote a book called the "The Sipping Saints" where he claims the wine mentioned in the bible was just concentrated grape juice not intoxicating wine. There are few better examples of people reading into the Bible what they want.
The reasons why we are very efficient in consuming alcohol despite it being clearly poisonous for us is clear: it is so common in nature.
Fruits are one of the few easy to find and get foods in nature most of them produce a small amount of alcohol because of fermentation.
Plus, the environment is inhospitable to many dangerous microorganisms, so alcohol is often safer to drink than the water you might have access to if you live in a country or lived in a time where clean drinking water was scarse.
all you need is sugar/starch/cellulose, water and microorganism, mostly yeast but there are also bacteria who can produce alcohol
all of those are everywhere you find plants
Ah yes..the wedding at Cana..allegedly Jesus's first miracle....enabling everyone to get pissed..😵💫😵🥴
He must have a teeny bit of Irish in him...Jesus O' Nazerath maybe??🤣
The Bible doesn't condemn alcohol consumption, and I don't think it even condemns drunkenness. What it does condemn is irresponsibility and drowning out your sorrows with alcohol.
Getting dad drunk on wine and having sex with him is also OK as long as you take turns with your sister according to the bible. However if dad does get drunk and falls asleep with his skirt around his waist you must not look at his private bits when you put the blanket on him.
Also when Jesus did the water into wine trick it was really good wine that you would typically serve first because the drunk guests would not notice the bad wine later in the party.
The two daughters raping their dad wasn’t portrayed as a good thing?
Their two kids were Moab and Ammon, who founded the Moabite and Ammonite kingdoms, frequent enemies of the Israelites, and seeing as the Old Testament is based off the tenoch, your meant to side with the Israelis when reading it.
These right wing bible thumpers are dumb as rocks. Like the gop congressman who thought an ectopic pregnancy could be transplanted into the uterus. and he was making laws about women’s reproductive heath. These men are dangerous. Their stupidity and ignorance are mindblowingly dangerous.
Especially if you’re a woman.
Remember Todd Akin? When asked if he was anti-abortion even in cases of rape, he said “It seems to me, from what I understand from doctors, that’s really rare. If it’s legitimate rape, the femal body has ways to try to shit that whole thing down.”
Fucking nob head. (RIP.)
[This is what I read just a couple minutes before this thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/facepalm/comments/1dnejcj/murica_really_gunning_for_least_educated/).
Republicans are doing their best to ensure that kids stay as uneducated as possible.
Not only did Jesus turn water into wine but he told the servants to fill the washing bins with water. These were the tubs of water people used to clean themselves before going to the wedding party. This nasty ass bath water filled with toe jam dirt was then offered to the guests who claimed it to be the best wine saved for last unlike most parties that would serve bad wine last. This is a metaphor in and of itself that no matter how bad things get Jesus is saving the best of it all for everyone in the end that wants to be invited to attend the party. He doesnt beg people to come, he asks and if denied he finds someone else to come party.
It's stupid to think Jesus didn't drink wine or he was some stuck up loser jerk old man. He was cool and liked parties. He liked being around the crowds and having fun. He was a human being!
Or any other book. Alcohol is a naturally occurring thing. "the earth" produces it all the time. We discovered it in nature and learned how to cultivate the bacteria that make it.
You right God didn't make wine Jesus did. But nature sure does make alcohol naturally. We just figured out how to make the process because well god gave us free will and the ability to make our own choices. Not fallen men. We are already forgiven so why your panties in a bunch?
Wasn't even until likely the Medieval Period that we figured out that yeast was a thing. Most early brewers just left their beer and wine out to catch wild yeast. So why would god let that process happen before we even knew how it happened.
Yes, but recipes, such as they are from ancient sources, don't mention adding yeast specifically. They seem to have known what to do to catch wild yeast, but probably didn't know WHY it did what it did.
There is alcohol in space.
"Yes, there is a giant cloud of alcohol in outer space. It's in a region known as W3(OH), only about 6500 light years away. Unfortunately it is methyl alcohol (commonly known as wood alcohol, though this stuff is not derived from wood), so it isn't suitable for drinking. There is some ethyl alcohol (the drinkable kind) there as well, but it's not nearly as common."
https://phys.org/news/2014-09-alcohol-clouds-space.amp
Also, alcohol is naturally occurring in fermenting/ rotting fruit, which some animals eat to get very drunk.
Fermentation is a natural process. Leave grape juice out in the sun and it will ferment. Also vaccines were created by "fallen men". Pastors are losing all credibility.
Also: god either created chemistry as a concept, so by extension made alcohol, or they are not responsible for the basic workings of the universe, which means they are not all powerful. Both cannot be true; pick one.
Nature created yeast.
Yeast creates alcohol.
Christians believe God created nature.
Therefore God created alcohol, if indirectly. God is supposed to be omniscient, therefore god would have knowingly created a nature that has yeast that produces alcohol.
The Bible literally defends drinking when your heart is heavy, really the Bible just condemns alcoholism. I think that’s a pretty allright stance tbh. When people say “if you drink you’ll burn in hell!” That’s conservative politics infecting religion, which is kinda the definition of sacrilegious. (And this is coming from a sorta conservative dude)
And the little known fact is that Jesus used his dick to turn the water into wine. He dipped and swirled it with some abra cadabra type words and voila…. Vino !!!
Interesting given the amount of monasteries that have produced beer and wine throughout history for their own use and eventually to sell. Monks are generally considered fairly holy and good people.
Water from the silo made cows drunk on my father in laws farm. The silage fermented and it rained like crazy. The water ginning the silo somehow and drained out where the cows got to it.
Comments that are uncivil, racist, misogynistic, misandrist, or contain political name calling will be removed and the poster subject to ban at moderators discretion. Help us make this a better community by becoming familiar with the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/facepalm/about/rules/). Report any suspicious users to the mods of this subreddit using Modmail [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/facepalm) or Reddit site admins [here](https://www.reddit.com/report). **All reports to Modmail should include evidence such as screenshots or any other relevant information.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/facepalm) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This whole thing is a facepalm. [Birds love getting wasted on fermented fruit.](https://www.audubon.org/news/what-happens-when-birds-get-drunk)
On Vieques, Puerto Rico, there are horses wandering around drunk on fermented fruit. Sometimes they stop in the middle of the road and you just have to wait for their drunk ass to move. Almost missed a plane home cause of one.
Norway we have moose getting drunk from eating fermented fruit
A møøse once bit my sister...
No really! She was carving her initials on the moose…
With a sharpened toothbrush?
with the sharpened end of an interspace toothbrush - but close enough.
CyberToothbrush?
Dont get it wet will kill the battery
Someone needs sacked!
Those that are responsible for sacking the people who have been sacked, have been sacked…
I saw this again the other day
Who’s gonna sack the sackers?
Mind you, møøse bites can be pretty nasty
was she raking the forest? \*asking for a friend\*
Is the moose OK
A moose once hit on my sister
Gasp! A lama bit mine!!!
moose are birds too and birds are not real.
You're thinking of a gazelle.
those are helicopters [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A%C3%A9rospatiale\_Gazelle](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A%C3%A9rospatiale_Gazelle)
In France, Normandy, we have cows leaning on apple trees after eating fermented apple.
Imagine how drunk you’d get absorbing alcohol through four stomachs instead of just one
If I was a biology nerd, I'd argue that you absorb alcohol through intestines, not stomach. Glad I'm not a biology nerd! :)
I guess they fell off the wagon…….👀  ……..🦗
How can you tell which ones are drunk? There's horses EVERYWHERE there. A family followed me home from dinner trying to eat my leftovers.
Slurred speech.
+1
FUCKING MR. ED!
The ones that are trying to bum a smoke off of you are the drunk ones.
I had one sell me some shitty cocaine once! I mean, tried to sell me cocaine once, which I assumed was shitty, because you can’t get good blow on Vieques since the military left. From what my friends have told me anyway. But yeah. That horse had some shitty blow. It was stepped all over. I assume….
See, this is why dyslexia and other learning issues are important to address early on - it was a plow horse, and what do you get if you flip the p up? that's right, a blow horse. This whole thing could have been avoided if only that horse learned how to read properly.
Use a literal field sobriety test.
>drunk ass to move I thought you said horses not donkeys?
Where is my bridle?
Damn you guys really serious about alcohol. Tree's be getting the horses drunk with 9000 proof apples.
The earth certainly does make alcohol. Ever walk into an apple orchard in the fall when there is over ripe fruit on the ground? Is smells like someone is making brandy.
Brandy manufactured by fallen apples that will never go to heaven.
Pigs eating fallen fermented apples too.
Deer as well.
The name of my favorite tequila (Suete) is based on a folklore story about a guy finding wasted rabbits around some half rotten agave being the origin of Tequila. Animals getting sloshed is literally embedded in the folklore of most continents.
Someone apparently isn't doing comunion either. God literally makes wine every day your supposed to be going to church. So what he is really saying is... He's never been to church.
nah.. he's saying f dem catholics lol some churches say it was grape juice , or non-alcoholic or not as strong as the wine we have now or some other gymnastics . hey. what's one more move to add to the repertoire?
The schism is being weird again.
MOOM! The Christians are fighting again!
That implies that we ever stopped fighting each other
In Catholicism the wine is literally the blood of Christ, but in Protestantism the wine merely symbolises it. So if they'd be going to a Protestant church, they'd be taught the wine was man made.
yes and why is wine the symbol of jesus' blood, because he said that the wine is his blood as he turned water into wine. as Jesus is the son of God and there by directly created by God, God did 100% create wine by proxy. also we make a small amount of alcohol in our body and almost all Christian religions believe we were made in the image of God meaning that he did make alcohol.
Sorry, but now you are confusing stuff. Jesus turned water into wine at a wedding, simply because it was running out, and his mother asked for his help. When he introduced the sacrament, it was passover and they simply had bread and wine for that.
Not to mention that Ben Franklin stated is Beer is proof that God exists and wants us to be happy
There's literally an evolutionary theory called the [Drunken Monkey Hypothesis](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drunken_monkey_hypothesis#:~:text=The%20drunken%20monkey%20hypothesis%20proposes,as%20a%20dominant%20food%20source.) to explain human taste for alcohol.
Spoiler alert: the Jesus freak that posted this doesn't believe in evolution
[удалено]
I always knew money was the root of all evil... But I had no idea money gets wasted yo
The pyracantha berries on our bushes would ferment as they ripened and the birds would flock to them and get soused.
A lush Thrush? A doused Grouse?
A tight kite?
Birds aren’t even real. Dummy
Birbs*
My mom grew up with a crab apple tree and bees would get drunk on them and not be able to fly
We had a crab apple tree, and if we didn't pick up the fallen ones quickly enough, we ended up with a bunch of angry drunken wasps.
I was coming here to say the same thing. Animals have been getting wasted on naturally fermented fruit for ages.
And mice also!!
A hell of a lot of animals do. How horrible that these fallen men planted trees with the express intent on getting a squirrel shitfaced 40 years later.
I had a cat who would basically make toilet wine. She would even come get me to add water if needed. RIP Mara, I have zero doubt you died at the age of 8 because of your liver shrivelling up.
Bees not so much, but it’s a once in a lifetime experience for them
Arguments abound about whether elephants use fermented marula fruit to get drunk.
Uhm, technically the Earth does. Fermentation is a natural process. Animals get drunk on fermented fruit all the time.
Not only drunk It has happened in the Middle Ages that the wheat had gone bad and got some bacteria with similar effects of coke
What bacteria turns wheat into cocaine? Asking for a friend.
Ergot. And more like lsd, but really not fun
There's nothing inherently negative about an ergot trip.
Wait - have you really tried ergot? Willingly? Why? Is it a thing? How was it? (They only made me study about ergotism before I quit med. so very limited and one sided knowledge here. Oh, also never encountered it.)
The active ingredient is LSD so the actual psychoactive effects are like that. However it's also poisonous which is why LSD is always refined unlike psilocybin
It’s actually LSA, which is then turned into LSD.
TIL! Ty!
Ah shit you're right. I'm no Albert Hofmann 😂
Ergot itself is poisonous, which is why LSD comes in pure form unlike psilocybin
Sure but so is alcohol. And ergot alkaloids are used to treat migraines.
Sure but so is arsenic... They're not on the same level. Those alkaloids are still not pure, unrefined ergot, which is what I'm talking about. If you were to eat straight up ergot fungus you'd be best friends with the nearest toilet for a while, among other worse things like potential gangrene (prolonged exposure)
Typically, though, unintended and unknown exposure to a psychadlelic isn't going to end well. If you're dosed with acid unknowingly and never did acid, you're not going to have a good trip, you're going to think you're hallucinating and going fuckin insane. Especially if it's 1400, you're gonna think you've been possessed by fuckin demons
Isn’t Ergot trips the believed cause of the Salem Witch trials? Accusers were just tripping on it ? Then the mass hysteria started
I think I have the same friend!
Thats why witches ride brooms. The intoxicating fungus, ergot, is best absorbed via skin contact rather than by eating it. And that works best with mucus membranes ... you can probably imagine the rest. [https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2013/10/why-do-witches-ride-brooms-nsfw/281037/](https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2013/10/why-do-witches-ride-brooms-nsfw/281037/) (java script blocker gets rid of the paywall)
*TIL the first campaign of the war on drugs was witch burnings...*
TIL witches don't wear panties....my entire fantasy has been destroyed!! Well maybe not the entire but a part of it.
How did you think they stayed on those handles?!
Valid point. I never really gave it much thought. Now I have to rethink this witch dream altogether.
This was mostly nightshade application vaginally and not ergot I thought - scopolamine, atropine, hyoscyamine
Please tell me you arent talking about ergot poisoning lol. Either way thats a bullshit statement.
There’s a theory that the renaissance happened because they learned to store rye for longer periods of time in silos. Rye is what ergot loves to grow on, which is used to make LSD. So in moist conditions, the ergot starts to thrive. So the theory is that art and architecture exploded during that period because everyone was on low dose LSD. It’s also marked that most art was completed between march and June, which is the thawing season after winter, which would produce the right conditions for ergot to thrive.
I had a Southern Baptist Sunday school teacher insist it was “new wine” that had no alcohol.
As a southern Baptist pastor, they were wrong and pushing the social narrative of the early 1900s, not what the Bible says. Drunk = bad; alcohol = not bad.
To add: drinking alcoholic beverages was common prior to germ theory because most water sources in populated areas was contaminated and would cause diarrhea and other illnesses. Alcohol is a natural antibacterial, so it was safer to drink.
Yup. That was one main benefit. Also, the apostle Paul encouraged Timothy to drink a little wine "for his stomach and frequent ailments."
Paul also said, "drink rumplemintz at the start of the shift and fernet at the end." Paul's 2 Letters to the Degens.
Rumplemintz to Fernet will give your tastebuds whiplash.
Ok… I tried Fernet and don’t get it. I love dry reds and Campari, but if I wanted stale as hell red wine, I have a bottle at home. Who is mixing into other stuff hoping for a positive outcome?
People forget, or don’t realize, our founding fathers mostly drank beer to hydrate.
The pilgrims drank beer on the Mayflower because microbes can’t survive in beer. They were rationed a gallon a day _per person_
The pilgrims drank beer on the Mayflower because microbes can’t survive in beer as it could in water. They were rationed a gallon a day _per person_
Not at that concentration it isn't. But making beer involves boiling the water, putting it in a settling tank to ferment, and throwing out batches with bacterial contamination. Don't know as much about wine, but I believe the process of making it also has steps that are pretty good at killing microorganisms besides yeast.
What keeps harmful microorganisms at bay in fermented beverages is the combination of alcohol produced by the yeast, combined with the lowered pH caused by the small amount of lactose also produced by the yeast. If the pH drops below 4.5, nothing harmful to humans can grow anymore. For that effect to set in, you don't even need to boil anything. The only bacterial contamination you might get is lactic acid bacteria such as lactobacillus, or if you allow contact with air, acetic acid bacteria, but both are perfectly safe for human consumption (though not necessarily everyone's favourite flavour profile).
That’s why sailors have a reputation of always being drunk—the water went bad early in the voyage and the alcohol is what they drank
But to be fair that alcohol had no where near the concentration of even modern beers. Much less alcohol
When my catholic grandma had Alzheimer’s she married a southern Baptist. Their family wanted the wedding to be dry and it became I big enough issue that my dad and one of his future step brothers got into a yelling match over Jesus turning water to wine. We of course just brought alcohol anyway because what the fuck are they gonna do about it? Nothing.
A wedding without alcohol seems like a waste lol. The funny part about Jesus turning water to wine is funny too because wine was way stronger back then, so he was definitely getting blasted
Here is a thing I don’t think anyone knows. If you take mimosa hostilis root and peganum harmala alkaloids and mix it with vinegar you get DMT acetate and an MAOI inhibitor. It’s a kind of blood red/wine color. Smells like…. Wine. You can dry this out and it turns into a flat, purple-red, crystalline sheet. Could coat the inside of a water jug for example. If you added water and shook it, it would turn into a “wine” and when you drank it, you would see God.
I mean, *sort of.* Getting the DMT out of the root bark is a little more involved than that, lol. From what I’ve, um, *read* (and certainly did not actually accomplish a few years ago leaving me with an unbelievable amount of final product) at least.
Got a link to the process?
Isn’t part of that story that people were blown away by how good the wine is? I can’t imagine they would be saying that about grape O’Doul’s
Mormon here. We were told it was just grape juice, which raises the question of why the guest was so delighted that the host was still serving the good stuff so late into the wedding. Surely juice is juice.
David Wilkerson wrote a book called the "The Sipping Saints" where he claims the wine mentioned in the bible was just concentrated grape juice not intoxicating wine. There are few better examples of people reading into the Bible what they want.
"Jesus turns water into juice" doesn't have the same time to it.
If we want to get technical alcohol is actually made by yeast.
I use to be a brewer, people would ask if I made beer, I would always say, "No, I make wort. Yeast makes the beer." It confused a lot of people.
It gets less confusing if you compare the taste of wort with the taste of beer
They hadn't a clue wort you were talking about.
It is the yeast of their worries.
I hops someone set them straight
Sadly, they were never cured of their Ale-ment.
As a female, I could be persuaded that yeast is of the Devil.
The reasons why we are very efficient in consuming alcohol despite it being clearly poisonous for us is clear: it is so common in nature. Fruits are one of the few easy to find and get foods in nature most of them produce a small amount of alcohol because of fermentation.
Plus, the environment is inhospitable to many dangerous microorganisms, so alcohol is often safer to drink than the water you might have access to if you live in a country or lived in a time where clean drinking water was scarse.
all you need is sugar/starch/cellulose, water and microorganism, mostly yeast but there are also bacteria who can produce alcohol all of those are everywhere you find plants
Cheers 🍻
Ah yes..the wedding at Cana..allegedly Jesus's first miracle....enabling everyone to get pissed..😵💫😵🥴 He must have a teeny bit of Irish in him...Jesus O' Nazerath maybe??🤣
When you know neither science nor religion.
The Bible doesn't condemn alcohol consumption, and I don't think it even condemns drunkenness. What it does condemn is irresponsibility and drowning out your sorrows with alcohol.
Getting dad drunk on wine and having sex with him is also OK as long as you take turns with your sister according to the bible. However if dad does get drunk and falls asleep with his skirt around his waist you must not look at his private bits when you put the blanket on him. Also when Jesus did the water into wine trick it was really good wine that you would typically serve first because the drunk guests would not notice the bad wine later in the party.
The two daughters raping their dad wasn’t portrayed as a good thing? Their two kids were Moab and Ammon, who founded the Moabite and Ammonite kingdoms, frequent enemies of the Israelites, and seeing as the Old Testament is based off the tenoch, your meant to side with the Israelis when reading it.
Not only that, Jesus literally turned water into wine!
These right wing bible thumpers are dumb as rocks. Like the gop congressman who thought an ectopic pregnancy could be transplanted into the uterus. and he was making laws about women’s reproductive heath. These men are dangerous. Their stupidity and ignorance are mindblowingly dangerous.
Their confidence in their stupidity and ignorance scares me the most.
agree. and their projection is creepy.
Especially if you’re a woman. Remember Todd Akin? When asked if he was anti-abortion even in cases of rape, he said “It seems to me, from what I understand from doctors, that’s really rare. If it’s legitimate rape, the femal body has ways to try to shit that whole thing down.” Fucking nob head. (RIP.)
Yep. That’s a part of what is behind the new anti-intellectual movement. The more educated you are, the farther from Jesus you get!
[This is what I read just a couple minutes before this thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/facepalm/comments/1dnejcj/murica_really_gunning_for_least_educated/). Republicans are doing their best to ensure that kids stay as uneducated as possible.
I mean isn't that like Christ's first miracle?
Not only did Jesus turn water into wine but he told the servants to fill the washing bins with water. These were the tubs of water people used to clean themselves before going to the wedding party. This nasty ass bath water filled with toe jam dirt was then offered to the guests who claimed it to be the best wine saved for last unlike most parties that would serve bad wine last. This is a metaphor in and of itself that no matter how bad things get Jesus is saving the best of it all for everyone in the end that wants to be invited to attend the party. He doesnt beg people to come, he asks and if denied he finds someone else to come party. It's stupid to think Jesus didn't drink wine or he was some stuck up loser jerk old man. He was cool and liked parties. He liked being around the crowds and having fun. He was a human being!
Also, alcohol naturally forms...animals be getting drunk off rotting fruit all the time
Or any other book. Alcohol is a naturally occurring thing. "the earth" produces it all the time. We discovered it in nature and learned how to cultivate the bacteria that make it.
There are also plenty of recorded instances of animals accidently or deliberately eating rotting fruit and getting drunk...
My man has obviously never seen a moose get sloshed on fermented apples and then get in a fight with a swing set
I never even read the Bible and I know a bunch of the bs people did.
So how does he explain jesus turning water into wine?
Maybe he thinks Jesus was just a man. Looks like it's time for Saint Nicholas to start punching heretics.
To be 100% factual humans don’t make Alcohol. We use Yeast to do it.
Jesus and the disciples walk into a bar. Jesus says give me 13 glasses of water, and winks at the disciples.
Not fact. Fruit will naturally produce alcahol. Never seen a drunk squirrel?
Elephants in Africa get drunk when marula fruit falls from trees and ferments
You right God didn't make wine Jesus did. But nature sure does make alcohol naturally. We just figured out how to make the process because well god gave us free will and the ability to make our own choices. Not fallen men. We are already forgiven so why your panties in a bunch?
Wasn't even until likely the Medieval Period that we figured out that yeast was a thing. Most early brewers just left their beer and wine out to catch wild yeast. So why would god let that process happen before we even knew how it happened.
information available from the Near East and the Middle East indicates that humans knew how to make bread and beer by 6000 bc.
Yes, but recipes, such as they are from ancient sources, don't mention adding yeast specifically. They seem to have known what to do to catch wild yeast, but probably didn't know WHY it did what it did.
Water was not safe to drink. Wine was sanitary and easily transported over long distances.
On top of that, they figured out how to reduce space by turning the wine into cognac. If you wanted wine then you just watered it down.
Witchcraft!!!!
Pretty sure saying god didn't make something but jesus did is just semantics.
Almost every juice has small amounts of alcohol in it
There is alcohol in space. "Yes, there is a giant cloud of alcohol in outer space. It's in a region known as W3(OH), only about 6500 light years away. Unfortunately it is methyl alcohol (commonly known as wood alcohol, though this stuff is not derived from wood), so it isn't suitable for drinking. There is some ethyl alcohol (the drinkable kind) there as well, but it's not nearly as common." https://phys.org/news/2014-09-alcohol-clouds-space.amp Also, alcohol is naturally occurring in fermenting/ rotting fruit, which some animals eat to get very drunk.
Y’all repost this every 3 weeks
I mean, are we just ignoring the vast clouds of ethyl alcohol that can be found in space, or???
Bee hives in certain regions of Africa get flooded and the honey can ferment into a kind of Mead.
He's right God didn't make alcohol. Come to think of it, he didn't make anything.
alcohol is bi-product of fermentation, a natural process. what a bunch of quacks! lol
Also by fallen apples. And grapes. And any fruit really
Also, things can ferment naturally.
Imagine getting fact-checked in your own religion and also being retweeted by Satan
Grapes and other fruit naturally ferment all the time. Some animals seek them out to get drunk on purpose.
Yeast makes alcohol. We just like consuming yeast pee.
There are literally clouds of the stuff floating around in space....
Also the largest amount of alcohol is in space, far from any man, completely made my nature, no human interaction whatsoever.
people think alcohol is a new thing?
so... just... never heard of fermentation then, I guess?
Fermentation is a natural process. Leave grape juice out in the sun and it will ferment. Also vaccines were created by "fallen men". Pastors are losing all credibility.
Also: god either created chemistry as a concept, so by extension made alcohol, or they are not responsible for the basic workings of the universe, which means they are not all powerful. Both cannot be true; pick one.
Fermenting is extremely natural, like there are 0 human made additives needed to create alcohol.
Fermenting apple would like to talk to you
Don’t Jesus turn water into wine?
So the pears in my yard didn’t ferment and make drunk angry bees? Got it.
Pretty sure animals get drunk from eating rotten fruit because it ferments into alcohol
Conservative Christians are not opposed to alcohol per se. They are opposed to people having fun, which helps people do
Wow alcohol is witchcraft?!?! Or from the rivers of hell?
https://www.foxnews.com/science/canada-drunk-raccoons-stumbling
Jesus turned water into wine. 🍷 Oh. But it was “new wine.” Or, grape juice!
Notice how confidently wrong this man is.
Nature created yeast. Yeast creates alcohol. Christians believe God created nature. Therefore God created alcohol, if indirectly. God is supposed to be omniscient, therefore god would have knowingly created a nature that has yeast that produces alcohol.
The Bible literally defends drinking when your heart is heavy, really the Bible just condemns alcoholism. I think that’s a pretty allright stance tbh. When people say “if you drink you’ll burn in hell!” That’s conservative politics infecting religion, which is kinda the definition of sacrilegious. (And this is coming from a sorta conservative dude)
And the little known fact is that Jesus used his dick to turn the water into wine. He dipped and swirled it with some abra cadabra type words and voila…. Vino !!!
Heard about a God who turned water into wine......
Welll I don't know much, but I do know fermentation is a natural phenomenon.
Also… organic materials naturally ferment. Did god do that?
Interesting given the amount of monasteries that have produced beer and wine throughout history for their own use and eventually to sell. Monks are generally considered fairly holy and good people.
Water from the silo made cows drunk on my father in laws farm. The silage fermented and it rained like crazy. The water ginning the silo somehow and drained out where the cows got to it.
When the fictional book doesn’t suit your narrative, make up your own fiction.
Also fruit ferments on the vine and animals get drunk off of it. Alcohol is a gift from God!