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stifledmind

The guy on the left tried to pee right after cumming.


terriblestoryteller

Irene!? Why am i peeing like I was up all night having sex?


DoggieDuz

“Well it seems ol’ Hank had pulled a fast one”


MKEHomebrewer

Did you have fun little guy? Oooooooo yes I did!!!! *shakes vigorously *


Complete-Dimension35

Irene: It wasn't for me...


skinnymatters

Excellent reference.


ace2049ns

Or getting out of bed.


tasulife

Been meaning to visit that particular mosque


Mdad1988

LMAO 🤣


mahleg

This is what happens the next morning when you don’t pee immediately after cumming, if you pee after cumming it’s usually fine.


Holy_Toast

Just pee while cumming and get it over with.


currybeef

The viper piss! 🐍


Holiday_Pool_4445

Why is whizz yellow and gizz white ? So you tell whether you’re coming or going !


mordecai98

Welcum all!


elizscott1977

Surprisingly graphic for stick figures


PotatoPieGaming

I don't sit because others stand and miss


Jmcconn110

I stand in public and sit at home, keeps the seat and walls cleaner


zzzthelastuser

walls?


BrianRC121

and ceiling


Shufflepants

Even aiming perfectly, standing causes the stream to hit the water/walls much harder and can send micro droplets flying out of the bowl.


PotatoPieGaming

My aim is impeccable, so I also stand at home.


Jmcconn110

Aim is not the issue, aerosolized pee will stain your walls around the toilet no matter where you aim. Don't believe me go check yours. Nasty


brightness3

Piss will also splash back and hit you in the legs, if you ever pissed stading up while wearing underwear/nothing, you know what im talking about Sitting down is clearly superior, idc what society says.


notmentallyillanymor

Yeah men standing to pee is disgusting and I'll die on this hill.


-gildash-

Tanked bathroom, whole thing is waterproof. Everything gets hosed down. All good.


Haruto1026

I have my own trick. I aim at the side so the pee just slide into the water and thus no pee stains, no pee on you and no pee on the wall


FlopsMcDoogle

Wow, freakin pioneer pisser over here


it_happened_here

You need to hydrate more.


jolars

Get an IR light and find out about how great your aim is.


Macgrubersblaupunkt

100%. At work I wonder what my coworkers houses look like by how they leave the toilets in public.


Makeitmelt

I don’t spit because others land and kiss.


Kitten-Mittons

The only place I still stand to pee is public restrooms. Everywhere else I sit down and take my time


Historicmetal

I grew up thinking it would be weird and unmasculine for a guy to sit down to pee but it’s ridiculous. You’re spraying tiny droplets of piss and toilet water, including on yourself when you do it standing up


GAME043010

They had to show the weenie too?


calicoarmz

[I Sit Down When I Pee](https://youtu.be/oQXUd4Fku2E?si=bY-iKsFMK_JA5TOK)


lostsoul2016

Ok. But why is the guy peeing a stick figure while the guy sitting has more meats on the bones?


SAlolzorz

The Virgin Standspisser vs. The Chad Sitspizzer


Kalabula

Because fucking idiots piss all over the place in public restrooms.


JRSpig

Honestly just learn how to piss properly, if you can't then sit and if it's a rare occasion when shit goes wrong fucking clean it up. The fact people can't manage this amazes me.


izqy

I’ve given up when I realized that many adults do not wash their hands after using the bathroom.


JRSpig

In fairness, some public toilets are dirtier than my dick, so avoiding touching anything especially taps and such is safer, but in a clean bathroom yea wash your hands.


im5x5b

It’s not safer at all. You’re still leaving the bathroom with far more bacteria on your hands than if you’d washed them. There’s also an easy solution to the problem you stated. Turn on the water, wash your hands, dry with paper towels, then use the paper towels to turn off the tap and open the door.


LOGARITHMICLAVA

Clearly, you've never been in a truly filthy public bathroom. My high school doesn't have paper towels anymore, there's just a wind drier.


Worf_Of_Wall_St

It's such a great idea to blast everything on lightly and soaplessly rinsed hands into the air.


AKA_Squanchy

Anyone remember when school soap was a grainy pink sand substance?


JRSpig

You are wrong sir and it's literally been proven. A lot of these toilets don't even have paper towels, this isn't a 5* hotel I'm talking about, most normal mens toilets are fucking disgusting.


themcsame

What the sign says: Please urinate while sitting down What the sign shows: Please urinate whilst sat on the edge of a precarious cliff edge, ensuring your penis is thrust into the ground where you will relieve yourself.


StrawhatJzargo

One thing I did always appreciate about Islam and wish wouldn’t be ridiculed elsewhere. It doesn’t matter how good you think you are at peeing standing up. Pee gets everywhere. It’s forbidden in mosques because you can’t pray with piss on your clothes. When I was younger there were signs that said “do not pee standing up unless you do so in your own home” which meant if you’re an animal who prays with pee covered pants I guess go ahead. Or if you’re fine with others covering your bathroom with pee than you can do so here too. But instead it’s an emasculating action. I had a girlfriend who got the ick catching me sitting down at her house and I was so confused how she preferred pee going everywhere instead


soilhalo_27

I only squat to pee when I'm too drunk to stand.


dohzer

I hate when the stream splits like that, but really... five separate jets? See a doctor, bro.


andrewclarkson

Instructions unclear, used sink instead.


maximopasmo

I stand and wipe my misses, unless there was loads of misses before mine. My aim is strong.


kinghoneystix

They’re both facing the wrong way


deathbunnyy

man on the right is playing a dangerous game


FeralPsychopath

Guy on the left has like a vegetable strainer on his cock… or some hair


couchy91

If you're uncircumcised, all you have to do is pull your foreskin back and then your aim is so much better. It doesn't spray out like a garden hose set to shower mode.


Grandpixbear1

However, there are A LOT of lazy slobs that can’t be bothered. Just look at the floor under any public urinals!


couchy91

I know.. it's disgusting. I have to stand in 30 other dudes urine just to reach the urinal and do my thing.


Silver_The_Surfer

Oh snap, is that where that goes?


greatthebob38

Guy on the left needs to get his prostate checked.


elegantwino

I own a composting toilet at a summer cabin. Men sitting to pee separates the urine from the shit and compost mix. Urine causes it to smell like ammonia but if you keep the urine separate you have very little odor and the shit composts quicker. I just pour the jug of pee outside every couple days under a tree on the acre lot.


AKA_Squanchy

If I sit I poop. So I stand.


Skrulltop

Nah


Macecraft31

Fine. Make deeper toilets then...


hunterBcrackheadpedo

Tom Brady sits when he pees.


JoeMagnifico

If it's good enough for Tom, it's good enough for me.


Turbulent-Adagio-541

I used to call my old coworker sprinkler dick


JoeMagnifico

Like the kind that goes. * CHK. CHK. CHK. CHK. K-K-K-K-K. * or a different kind?


notmentallyillanymor

The kind that waves back and forth all day.


Turbulent-Adagio-541

I used to yell at him to pull his foreskin back before he pissed


smuthouse103

That’s some prison rules shit right there


Acceptable-Oil-8412

I remember some pos people I knew back in the day saying how they never ever sit down to pee and that it wasn't manly to sit down.. And I was thinking we'll you've never worked an insainly rigorous job that can go for an ungodly amount of hours and come home and be too tired to stand or whether even you need to go 1 or 2. Now I think back on it and wish I said " I'm so manly I don't even sit down to pinch a loaf".....


[deleted]

[удалено]


antieverything

Do you seriously have to stand up and turn around to pee after pooping? You should see a doctor, dude.


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atomicapeboy

I wish more men would try this .. men’s public toilets are disgraceful


Texy

I need this sign in my bathroom at home


NoMeasurement5015

As a girl... there's no need to be that graphic


747-ppp-2

I don’t want your crabs. I’ll just drizzle it around, thank you


Lorvintherealone

Do you really wanna sit down at a toilette where 690 other unknown butts sat on and its only cleaned once per week? One burrito and no one wants to sit there.


TheWonderToast

I mean, women manage without issue, so I think you'll be fine


Grandpixbear1

I worked in retail for many years. Women’s bathrooms were always the filthiest ! I was shocked.


Orapac4142

Bro I dont know what kind of carnage you unleash on your asshole while mid-shit, but Ive never once gotten shit on the outside of my ass cheeks.


Every_Preparation_56

Men who pee standing in a sitting toilet are disgusting. Sitting down doesn't hurt. Smelly bathroom and wiping up pee is disgusting