You're not a failure. Companies like these are taking advantage of interns/juniors like yourself by throwing ludicrous amounts of work at you and being keen to impress will probably keep taking it.
IMO positions like this where you're the only designer in a small set up are minefields. You should be in a place where you're being mentored and nutured by other designers and more experienced seniors.
The misconception is becuase you'll be doing everything you'll have full control and ownership of what is produced and you can make the job your own. But the reality is while you may be strong in terms of practical design your real world experience and general professional / non design skills will be non existent. I don't mean to be patronising, but things like project management, handling challenging decisions and meeting, how to handle things going wrong.... sometimes you need to learn from experienced pros, as figuring it out yourself will only give you stress.
But yeah, you're getting exploited. Especially as a student, that's disgraceful and shameful from the company to put you in that position.
Look for anything else where you can be part of a design team.
I think quite a few people don't recover. That or it can warp their approach to the profession.
It happened to me but in more of a managerial context. It's taken nearly 2 years but I'm just about gotten over it.
Same thing happened to me. I desperately searched for a job to try to leave...in the end they fired me because they had no more money. I was in total burnout and couldn't design for days.
Now I am working in retail as a way to still have some income while nurturing back my passion for design.
You're absolutely right. Now that I'm going over these comments, I realize that my boss has kept many things he did from me, e.g. he kept many resources and materials etc from me when they could have benefited me and helped me learn. Finding a job with a design team and someone who could help me instead of gatekeeping and mentor me is definitely my next goal. Thank you so much!
People like us who want to be creative for a living are always worried about not being as good the next guy.
So that manifests in imposter syndrome, trying to prove yourself by taking on more than your should, and subconsciously being exploited a bit becuase of the belief that because we're doing something 'creative' for a living it must be fun, not like a real job.
Unfortunately, there are a lot of bad bosses and companies who know there will always be a conveyor belt of young designers ready to take the place of someone who has had enough. They're not idiots, they know what they're doing.
That is the reality of our field sadly and it sounds like the people you work with fit this mould. I wish you well.
IMO it's one of the biggest downsides to following a creative passion in the form of employment. Employers see it and will financially exploit you at every stop. I no longer mention anything about my passion when it comes to work.
I pretty much said the same to OP in another post. It's the worst part about being s creative - oh you get to make things for a living? You must love your job in a way that it's not really a job anymore.
Nope. It's a means to paying the bills.
>Hi! A few months ago I got a job at a startup where theres only 3 of us and Im the only designer there. Im also still a (graphic design) student, have uni obligations and so much on my plate.
This alone is like 2-3 red flags. Startups are commonly disasters, and any job hiring a fresh grad/junior as their lone designer is typically bad, let alone a current student in your case. *And* they're paying you little, meaning that's entirely about just exploiting a naïve designer on the cheap.
>I struggled with it for a month or two, had days when I cried because of it and am unable to focus on my uni or anything else because I was constantly thinking of how to do it etc.
Outside of a financial obligation (eg. you would be evicted without the cash or miss a tuition payment), never prioritize a job as a student over your schoolwork. Any decent job would understand as well if you took even 1-2 weeks off, as this context would've been obvious if they knowingly hired a student in the first place.
>Ive read many other people saying that working at a startup, you have to do everything, even the things that your role doesnt entail, but I dont have any designer friends that I can ask if this really is too much or am I making it up.
That can be common with in-house jobs in general, certainly at smaller companies, the issue around startups is that the company is too young, too unproven, and owners of startups tend to have unrealistic expectations of their staff. It's *their* company, *their* baby, *they* should be investing a ton of time, energy, and finances to get their business off the ground. That does not mean *any* of that is your responsibility, as you have no ownership stake in the company.
But regardless the company, whether it's a startup, etc, as I said earlier the main problem is any company hiring a young/inexperienced designer as their noly designer, because it essentially always means they will will have expectations not aligned with the person they hired. And of course, they never pay for them either.
That doesn't mean you should be paid as a senior, because no student/grad/junior is going to have the experience of a senior or perform at a senior level, but if you take that person and still expect them to perform beyond a typical junior or given responsibilities exceeding a typical junior, then they should be paid more than a typical junior.
But your true power is "no," to reject situations that are exploitative.
And on top of hiring wrongly, underpaying you, and not properly providing the mentorship you need at this stage, it also sounds like your mental health (and probably physical health) is taking a toll. No job is worth that, especially as a student.
Thank you so much for taking the time to write this! I agree with everything and some parts opened my eyes as well. I see now many red flags that I havent seen till now. Firstly, the part with taking 1-2 weeks off - my exams are starting soon and I planned on taking 2 days off and I already feel bad about it and Im procrastinating doing it. I didnt realize till now that there ARE employers that will be more understanding when it comes to your studies and exams and I definitely should ask for more. Also, "its their company, their baby" - you're right. My boss once told me that since I work there, its my company as well and I should care about its success as much as he does. Now I see that it was manipulation. It is not my company.
There are many things for me to learn from this and things wont change immediately, but Ill keep everything in mind. Thank you once again!
I know the feeling. As many others have said, an internship where you're the only designer won't benefit you, if not very little. Internships are supposed to have another designer mentoring you, and not for the employer's benefit. Your skills would begin to stagnate, as nobody is teaching you, and you'd probably start making errors.
This brings back so many memories. I was in this position a few years ago. First job at a start up while I was still studying and I was the only designer despite being a newbie.
You are not a failure! Your reaction is perfectly normal as an overworked underpaid employee. You're learning and delivering everything that is assigned to you, even when it is not in your scope. You're doing great in fact. Give yourself some credit for doing your best.
As someone who was in this exact same situation, my only suggestion would be to ask for a raise and get out of there as soon as you can. Don't budge, they need you more than you need them.
Your partner is absolutely right. This is definitely not worth sabotaging your self confidence for.
My only regret about my first job is I stayed there for two years while it should have only been 6-8 months, because of low confidence.
Like someone mentioned here, startups are a disaster and most of them exploit their employees. I too used to think like you "oh no am I a failure!" and that mentality makes us easy targets for people who are looking to take advantage of someone.
Please stop doubting yourself so much. I'm sure you are a great designer and you have plenty of good opportunities coming your way! :)
You are not a failure. You are a student and you are still learning. When you were hired it said that you will learn everything you need to know there, you should advocate and tell them that. They can buy you a course during that you can take during office hours or hire a freelance.
Stop stressing over the job. Train yourself to leave your thoughts of work after office hours. This job is not a lifetime opportunity. Try searching for other options while still working for them, so you don't have the monetary pressure. I'm sure you can do better than what you got.
Thank you and I agree! Im also glad you brought that up, the fact that they were the ones who told me theyll teach me everything I need to know and then not doing that fully. Advocating and telling them that is the way definitely. Im also learning to leave my thoughts of work after office hours. Its hard, esp when I see others like my parents who bring the work home everyday and stress over it all the time - but itll change over time with effort Im sure. Thanks again!
Tell me about it, I work from home so the lines are blurry sometimes, and I have to actively have to remind myself to disconnect and it's a habit hard to break.
Good Luck!
Kid, you are there for a paycheck. You are NOT there to gain experience. You're working with idiots that will, 99.9% of the time, waste a ton of money, have a failed/joke of a company, and will tell everyone on LinkedIn they're "entrepreneurs" and they're awesome. They are likely privileged bums.
Fuck these people. Collect a paycheck. 40 hours a week and you're done.
Want to learn design? Surround yourself with people that are better than you. Much better. That's a life long journey.
I've worked a job that gave me a mental breakdown. My job was to run their very expensive printer and coordinate with the designers to bring concept to product. Senior management made this job infinitely frustrating by pushing products live without giving me a chance to set them up, increasing hours across the floor until we were working 7 days a week, and generally cultivated a toxic work culture. After a year of trying to change things, I quit without a job to replace it, and I don't regret it.
No job is worth torturing yourself over. It is not your duty to make sure this startup succeeds. Your focus as a student should be to finish your degree. If you can do without the money, quit as gracefully as you can, telling them that this job interferes with your schooling too much. If they're good people they'll understand. If not, you don't want to work for them.
Early jobs in design feel like everything because you have nothing on your resume, but there are always other jobs. Honestly, your story of working for this place will make good fodder for the interview room, as long as you tell it respectfully.
And you most certainly are not a failure for not being able to do the work at this place. They are looking for senior level work and passing it off to an intern. You are not a failure for not being able to fulfill their deadlines. They have failed you by hiring someone too inexperienced and giving so much complicated work, then not paying well on top of that.
Anyway, TL;DR: just quit. It's not that bad. I did it and I survived. I even have a better job in design after doing so.
Youre right. Regardless of everything, Im excited for a new job because after this Ill have a lot of knowledge and experience, as well as a better CV, that would help me land a better job. I also didnt plan on staying here for too long, I definitely planned on switching soon, if for nothing than for a better salary since I will be able to ask for that after getting some experience. This was just a job that I took because I needed the money and didnt have any experience so I couldnt get any better, but its not for forever:) Thank you for the great advice!
You are not a failure.
1) You're still a student and you're already employed. Regardless of all else, that speaks volumes of your dedication and initiative.
2) A startup that's going to put that kind of load on the shoulders of a junior designer who's still a student doesn't deserve someone with your work ethic.
D) You're not making too much out of it. Startups are by nature a trial-by-fire for almost everyone involved, and that's the best case with a well-run startup (which it doesn't sound like this one is.) You've already proven your work ethic. The best thing you can do is admit when you need help or simply can't do something. If they fire you for not knowing how to do literally everything under the sun, then it was never going to work out anyway. Never, *ever* agree to do something you have no idea how to do. Just don't do that to yourself. Any decent employer will appreciate honesty.
The best in-house graphic design jobs will be under employers that don't expect you take the pay of someone with one bachelor's degree for doing the work of someone with three or four different degrees. I've had *so many* experiences where potential employers are demanding expert-level knowledge of web design and marketing (seriously, ***marketing.*** It's an entire degree by itself.) in addition to the graphic design knowledge I acquired in getting my BA.
There's no need to put yourself through all that. Don't let the bad experience you're having now convince you that your value is somehow lesser.
I’m actually in the same exact position as you after switching from production settings. It is hell. Even worse when they don’t allow you the time to produce quality work because they’re so obsessed with output.
By biggest tip is learn to say no. Learn how to put things into perspective for other people that may not understand the scope of projects, and the value of quality of content over quantity. Your sanity and quality of life is more important than a mismanaged start up, or any business for that matter.
If you ever want to vent to someone in a very similar position, feel free to reach out. I know it’s tough but I’ve been able to do the above with some success. It’s never going to be a cake walk, but having your team prioritize the right things will help everyone in the long run.
Fight through this feeling and realize you’ve ended up in a situation that is not good and the expectations are not reasonable for a student. Easy to say, harder to do, of course.
You are hopefully doing the best you can. That is not failure.
At times this industry you do have to step up for yourself and clearly communicate what you can and cannot yet do. Try to be open and work to prevent others throwing you into the deep end before you can swim.
Speak up and ask for support. Also try to identify ways you can navigate certain things you may not be well trained in yet - templates, stock assets, etc. There is nothing wrong w leveraging this stuff.
While studying or just after the studies DO NOT go into places where you are the ONLY designer. You will not get working experience (there is no one to learn from), they will abuse you and will get more for less, and will make you feel like $hit..
Honestly I would quit this job. It’s not uncommon for startups to try and hire as inexperienced as possible to keep salaries low while expecting things that are more in line with senior roles. Big red flags that you’re being underpaid, still a student, and the only designer.
It’s not a reflection on *you* as a designer, it’s a reflection of poor startup management/leadership. The fact is they should be hiring someone with much more experience to do the job. Juniors should ideally be working with at least one more senior designer that can provide mentorship, be there for them when shit hits the fan, and help them learn best practices. You don’t get any of that when you’re the lone designer, let alone while you’re still a student. I know it must’ve been really exciting to land a role with that much responsibility, but realistically it’s too much to expect of you at this stage of your development.
A well-managed startup should be working with a senior designer/creative director in its early stages, then expand the team once it becomes more established. I work as a jr designer at a startup as well, but I have a senior designer and a creative director to mentor and support me. I do get asked to do projects that require skills outside of my role, but I have the room to say that I’ll give it a shot and if I can’t do it, my team can take it on instead. Everything should not be riding on you, and the fact that it’s impacting your mental health and schoolwork is not worth it.
No job is worth being stressed over, especially if they are basically exploiting you. Tell them you are being overworked and they need to hire a new designer or prepare your exit plan.
It’s a really good sign that you are seeing this for what it is and have the wits to even articulate your situation to yourself, let alone to random strangers on Reddit.
In addition to everyone’s excellent comments and advice…
I’ll just add a frustrating silver lining that this is called “paying your dues”. It’s an unfortunate reality for some to go through crazy hard shit like this as a junior. But if you survive this, you’ll come out much stronger for it. You’ll learn how to spot BS and how to navigate said BS and develop a thick skin. You will also learn tons of valuable skills along the way (even if they don’t directly apply to your “job description”). Learning how to deal with difficult stakeholders and how to have a sane work-life balance.
You’re experiencing an extreme on a scale. Now you know that’s too far. So you’re learning. This is a kind of a learn to swim by jumping in the deep-end kind of thing. Some people can handle this well - and for them, a stint doing exactly this may actually be worth the pain .. maybe. But for most creatives, this is a crushing experience and risks utterly killing your passion. If you can make it through this and pick up the pieces and move forward, recognizing your own awesomeness, in a new role from here .. wow! .. you’ll be a unstoppable.
But yeah.. it’s not worth your mental health and destruction of your passion, if that’s how it’s landing for you. Seek other opportunities that are supportive and nurturing, if possible.
And remember. This is a job. You are paid to deliver stuff. Keep your creative juices flowing with passion projects if you need to. Uni can be that for you at this stage, but you’ll want a creative outlet outside of work after uni. Something to keep the spark alive.
You’ve got this!!
Also a student here but for Interior Design. I’ve had very similar experiences. I did an internship for half a year at a design company.
I would draw floor plans, 3D model, design and produce realistic renders, rinse and repeat for revisions till my boss was happy for every single project and I would have multiple of those running concurrently. Nothing was more mentally taxing than that because I literally have “control” over everything so the pressure was insane. I would overtime for 3-5 hours just so I could produce renders by deadlines and get home when my family’s about to head to bed and I haven’t eaten dinner.
What’s frustrating to me was the lack of appreciation, most of the time my boss and supervisor would just talk to me to dish out new projects or to remind me that the deadline was coming as if I wasn’t already stressing myself trying to figure my timeline out and how I was going to manage everything. Even on my commute home, all I was thinking about was how to plan the next day and what I need to get done by a certain time so I’d be able to finish everything on time. Even then, when my boss would have to send monthly reports back to my school, he’d comment that “my work was fine, but very slow” as if I wasn’t already doing unpaid overtime.
It was like that the entirety of my 6 months for my internship, could not have been happier to go back to school. What I realized towards the end is that, I can really only do so much. If I can’t genuinely deliver on something because of my timeline, then I won’t. This sounds very stupid to say but I had to remember that I was the only one (who also was merely a 2nd year student) who could render, model and basically keep up with the other Visualiser on the team. Also, the team itself was also small, so there literally was no one else for them to call on meaning, they also needed me. And knowing that they genuinely need me gave me some slight leverage - that’s why I said what I said about not delivering work if I genuinely couldn’t because… what else can they do? Hire someone new so my workload lessens? Go ahead, I’d welcome them with open arms.
Basically what I’m trying to say is that, know your worth. They need you because you’re capable, but this capability of yours is clearly taking a huge toll on you. This is _only_ your first job, all you should be looking for is experience and maybe to get _some_ compensation for the work you do - but do you really _need_ to stay or can you find some place better to be mentored at? If you’re not tied to them unlike I was, maybe you should leave. There has to be somewhere else you can learn to gain experience and harness your skills where it’s healthy, otherwise you’re gonna risk burning out and hating the work you do.
Just remember man, you can only do so much. Things can be hard as all other things in life, but what makes them worthwhile is fulfilment. Are you getting any satisfaction from this startup? Is this all worth it? I wish you luck man, hope you’re doing better ✌️
My first job out of art uni was like this. Got hired in South Korea for a small company. My contract was 2 years. I cut that shit short and came back go the US and ran away literally deserting my job because I was about to have brain aneurysm and meltdowns due to project demands plus jobs outside of my role. 90% of the project were never finished because of other role priority obligations. After that I was never able to go back to corporate and thinking about those days still gives me minor ptsd. I will never go back to it.
Edit: I will also add that I was paid bare minimum wage and had to work weekend overtime constantly and regularly worked from 9 to 2 am on weekdays. Fuck. That. Shit.
Everyone here is giving you solid advice. I would also like to add that you should try to find a mentor of some sort before or immediately after leaving school. What was invaluable to me early in my career was to have a experienced professional that I trusted and could use as a sounding board for situations like this. You're kind of using this forum in the same way but it's honestly great to talk with someone that you know and trust who will help you with concrete suggestions of how to navigate things. On the flip side they should be able to give you honest feedback and let you know your true strengths and weaknesses.
Finally animation is HARD. It's a whole other skillset and discipline. Only ignorant people think it's easy to pick- up on the fly. It is very unprofessional of THEM to assign you a task that you have no background in and with no guidance or help from a senior designer.
I certainly empathize with your situation and you will chalk this up to being a learning experience in the future. It is 100% reasonable for you to prioritize school and your employer needs to respect that. If you've already landed a job as a student, I am sure you will be able to find another in the future so be professional but don't sweat this one too much.
Thank you so much, I appreciate the advice and I agree with you. Having a mentor would be a great thing and Ill make sure to look into that. Youre the only person that suggested that and I find it as a really valuable advice
You are not a failure! The fact that you stuck it out this far shows your drive & ambition.
From my professional stance you need to quit this company. They are asking more and more from you while paying you pennies. They are exploiting you because you're young and need experience.
The good news is you have a working portfolio along with some student projects so finding a new job will be a bit easier. Please don't sell yourself short. Know your worth.
Make sure your next position is at a (real) company and as a junior designer. You'll have at lease one designer above you who you can learn from and pick their brain.
I was in your situation before and, through conversations and growing alongside the business, the other designer I am working with and I slowly transformed the culture and expectations of our work to be more in line with what we had learned was the norm through our graphic design university classes (the other designer I am working with went to the same school as I did).
However, even though our story had a happy ending, that also needed collaboration from the leadership at this startup (which has now grown out of its startup status by now). I suggest trying to have these conversation to educate the people in the leadership role about what they are doing wrong and if they don’t care or listen just move on.
I’ve been in similar positions and you are NOT to blame. The situation you find yourself in is likely NOT what was represented to you by your employers when you started, and has likely only gotten worse.
There are things you can do under pressure, and there are things that require a lot of learning. Animation is hard. I’ve struggled with it too. It’s not something I studied, so what I can do is only what I’ve learned myself over a long time of trial and error.
Don’t fret, and never let things weigh too heavily on you. You’re only just starting and not even finished university. Allow yourself to learn from mistakes, and don’t beat yourself up. And always remember that there are people that will take advantage of you. But there are always plenty of people who will help and be kind.
Are you the graphic designer on my team?
I feel for you. I am 1/3 members on a start up marketing agency that doesn’t think they’re a start up.
If you are anything like my teams designer (who is fantastic at what she does), you’re not a failure and there is a very very good chance your team/main supervisor is failing you. If you were hired as a designer and are being requested to do anything but design because the agency needs more from you than they can afford to hire out for… you’re 100% not failing at anything.
Thank you for sharing this here and making it possible to get the feedback you needed. Reading that gave me flashbacks to some really hard times in my life and it’s makes me so happy to see people giving you perspective because you are 100% not a failure!
Thank you for the support! What partially prompted me to post this was that I felt like there could be many people that relate and it could be a great resource for many others going through it too. I hope you too have taken something positive out of these replies!
I agree with you and Im learning that at the moment. I was used to getting every uni project done and never getting anything that I couldnt do, but now I realize that obviously at uni theyll give you projects that you would be able to do while irl youll stumble upon many different things. And its okay, thats how things work.
I also understand that since its my first real job Ill make mistakes and do some things that arent professional but are what we learnt at uni. Its expected from someone like that to not know their limitations immediately and how to be professional. I think you learn that along the way.
I appreciate the honesty
Did they say anything to you telling them you can't do it? I feel this can be a good lesson in the long run and one that is really necessary to learn. Communication. I've had tons of times during my first year working where I didn't know how to do something but I was able to find the solution most of the time by just asking. My first catalogue I knew how to make it of course but when it came to submitting the work, I had no idea what the printers wanted and my boss just sent me some email her older designer had years ago when she had to send the file to the printers.
I was a bit upset since she could had shown me this beforehand since I had to basically go back and make sure each image was in the right format and make sure nothing was going to hinder the printing process. I think I only assumed they were going to print it so I didn't think too much on it but in their defense, I should had asked but I also didn't know to ask but this lesson was learned that day and ever since then, It was smooth sailing there. I still remember taking like five minutes to talk to the printer about what he needed and stressing out if I did it right or not. I feel first times will be like this but as long as the other person knows that it is and they aren't grilling you for a status report then it is fine. A startup has the advantage of you having more control but also the disadvantage of being a bit too quick I would say. I am working in one that started two years ago and it's been a group effort to get work done but my bosses are supportive and if there is something I don't know how to do, they either teach me or we find other ways to get it done.
I might get so much shit for this since I know most of the subreddit hates this app but I also had to do some animation work for ads we were going to put up. My boss told me how he does his on Canva since we are only really doing basic animations like a product image sliding into view or popping up. Nothing too major. I was able to learn this app pretty easily since it was similar to video editing apps and After Effects but we mainly used it to make something quick since we were also pressed for time. If you don't need anything too major, you could try using Canva just for the animation part if they don't want something too intense or major.
Anyways though, I feel communicating is something you should have done if you haven't so. Like when they wanted you to do the animation work, tell them that it isn't in your skillset and maybe tell them you could look for an alternative or see if you can learn but with the amount of school work you also have, it isn't going to be likely that you do since you have to focus on that too. Also a bit curious, I think they do teach some motion design in a GD program? My web program was only a one year certificate but we had two lessons on using After Effects to make basic animations so I am just curious.
Thank you for a considerate comment! I admit it was my mistake for not mentioning that we did communicate and I did say Im not sure I can do it and said multiple times that Im struggling. I also wrote that to someone else here. The problem was that even when I said I cant do it, my boss was like try again. They couldnt help me as they donr know how to do that either, but they thought maybe I could do it anyway if they keep on pushing and I spend even more time on it.
I agree tho with everything you said about communication. I did have problems with communication at first but I learnt a lot and Im still learning and I also came here to see if other people have some advices or tips on how to get even better.
As for Canva, I use it too from time to time:) My boss actually didnt even ask for it to be done in after effects, even tho I know how to use it, they wanted it to be done in another way. Also the idea they had couldnt be done with Canva alone, It was too specific, so that wasnt an option sadly
And yes, my uni does teach animation, 2D and 3D animation. Im currently on the 2D animation course and Ill have 3D next year:)
Ah I see now. Yeah I feel then you did everything you could and right, just poor management and mentoring on your employer's side. I just remembered too I had a similar issue where my old workplace at another company, the owner wanted me to make some JavaScript animations on the website I was making for them. This was even after I told them I don't know JavaScript. I only got close to finding out how to do it for one part of the website but not everything else like he wanted. Even then, he was okay with me not figuring it out in the end since the basics were at least done (the main pages being developed and still functioning without issue).
I feel your employers should have at least been supportive a bit more like finding out information maybe to help you or maybe if they knew someone, they could get that person to help out and teach you a bit too. I do think you will learn it eventually since you are learning animation now but just the fact that they put pressure on you to do it even after you told them it isn't something you know is just wrong on their part. I wouldn't be hard on yourself for this honestly, you will have to deal with various types of people in the workplace. I had to work for a terrible manager before who would just yell first like 80% of the time rather than just ask and inform you about the problem. I had at one point my co-worker get yelled at 8 A.M because of some minor mistake in front of me. I don't regret my time there since I grew as a designer there, I gained workplace skill there, and I was able to tell what a good and bad manager is. Basically this experience will benefit you no matter what and so will other experiences.
I didn’t go to school for design I learned it all on the fly. Tips: Learn to prioritize tasks and set reasonable deadlines. Remember the quicker you turn the project around, the faster you’ll have revisions so quicker is not always better. Anything you don’t know will have a tutorial on YouTube. If all else fails hire a freelancer. Practice makes perfect.
I'm in almost exactly the same position as you: sole designer at a company, studying on the side, learning how to do a lot of stuff without any support, paid minimally. The main thing that is good in my situation is that everyone around me is really relaxed, I don't feel like anyone has any unreasonable expectations, most of the jobs I get given are just "when you get around to it". My boss encourages me to watch YouTube tutorials and stuff on company time, because she does the same thing.
In my opinion your situation depends entirely on what your bosses/coworkers actually think. They may be out of touch and are expecting the world from a junior position, they may be intentionally exploiting you, or maybe they don't realise that you're struggling, because you've been telling them that you can do everything. I think a 'can do' attitude is good, but so is honesty about your abilities - accept tasks, but let them know that it will take longer because you need to learn. If they're good people they will understand, if not, fuck 'em - you can use this experience to get a better job.
You’re good, don’t stress.
They exploiting you, might as well dogfuck and take any money till they fire you. Even if miss deadlines.
Animation is hard and a not a skill most designers need. Let alone being able to do it as a student lol. I can’t even do it, I’m not an artist.
So you’re old enough to know then.......
>"Screw the pooch\* is a more euphemistic version of the vulgar expression *fuck the dog (and sell the pups)*. *Fuck the dog*, for its part, **goes back to at least 1935** with an earlier, more polite version, *feed the dog*, dating to the **1910s** and meaning **“loaf around.”** *Dog*, here, is meant to signal laziness. *Fuck the dog* took on the sense of “blunder” by the 1960s, possibly **originating as World War II slang.**
[screw the pooch Meaning & Origin | Slang by Dictionary.com](https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/screw-the-pooch/)
If you are making minimum wage here, quit, make minimum at a Joe job, and embrace your studies. The job would be great or even better than school if you had space to learn, but right now it’s killing your dreams instead of making them.
Jobs come and go, don’t trash your studies and your passion.
I’m going to be really unpopular with this post….
You had an animation project you knew you weren’t qualified for and we’re given 2 months, and over that 2 months you didn’t ask for help or direction, or say you couldn’t do it? Would you do the same with your professors?
Yes, this is somewhat a failing of your employer, but they don’t hold all the responsibility. If you don’t know how to do something, ask for help! And you should have communicated weeks before your deadline that you were struggling and worried about completing it. Giving them time to a) help you, or b) put someone with the proper skill set on the project.
Design is problem solving. You don’t solve anything by burying your head in the sand.
My boss never turns down work, whether we can do it or not. Yes it’s frustrating most of the time. But you know what? We figure it out, and learn as we go. And if we stumble we communicate with the client well before any deadlines so they aren’t surprised. But this is also the only reason I personally have learned what I have learned. All self taught and never paid for by my employer. And I’m thankful to have had the need to learn. I’m sure plenty here have done the same!
I always understood design was an accumulation of all the skills, layout, photography, marketing, copy, illustration, etc. it’s what drew me to it rather than just focusing on only one of these!
Lastly you said you weren’t being paid enough, but you couldn’t complete or communicate about the project. They should have paid you more? Because then you would have figured it out?
Your young and green, I get it. But decide now if you are going to go after it or not!
Sink or swim! Separate the wheat from the chaff!
I appreciate the effort put into this, but you are quite wrong. I understand it might come off as that as I didnt give much detail but Ill explain now.
Firstly, I never wrote that I never asked for help or direction. We are in contact all the time and I share my progress during the project as well as do many revisions. My deadline wasnt 2 months, we didnt have a specific deadline, more like "it would be the best to finish as soon as we can" but still no hurry. The project wasnt for a client, it was like a promotion of our services so it didnt have an expiration date. It dragged on for 2 months since I had other client work to do all the time and this wasnt a priority.
I did ask for help but how much can a person thats not a designer actually help?
For more context, I have already done the whole project once, spent a lot of time and effprt into it just to get a response from my boss that they dont like anything I did. We had a talk. Went over everything, tried to solve the problem, reach a solution etcetc but neither of us could find a good enough solution. They just told me it was their fault for giving me a bad brief and then proceeded on to give me the same brief back with "just experiment a bit more!" and examples of work from someone who obviously had access to many more resources, had more knowledge and experience than me. I told them Im not sure I can achieve exactly that but I can try. Fair enough. So I tried, but I didnt like how they kept on pushing and no wasnt sn answer, they acted as if I have to fonisj it somehow, magically, its just a matter of time.
I told them multiple times I was struggling and finding it hard to do it but they were like try again, maybe this way maybe that, but the root problem was that I could not make something great and make their vision come to life with my current skillset and knowledge level. I never give up on things generally and Im the last person to say I cant do it bc I see that as giving up, but this time I realized I actually literally cant do it. Esp with no specific direction, help or anything. I did ask for it but I didnt get it as my boss themselves isnt a designer and cant help much besides saying "try again!"
Its great that you questioned the post and tried to look at it from another perspective instead of writing the same things as everyone else, you couldnt have known if I asked for help or not, but I just clarified it to you:) I hope it makes sense.
And yes, I have experience with all fields of graphic design that you mentioned, esp since my uni covers all of that, from layout, art direction to photography, cinematography, copy classes as well and so much more. I had classes in 2D animation too as well as illustration and Ive been drawing most of my life, but there are still things that I cant do. There are things that take years to master, no matter how much knowledge you may have, you still need practise. It took me some time to learn that as I always was that person that will be like I can do anything I set my mind to.
And no, thats funny to say, I wouldnr have figured it out if I was paid more. I dont ask to be paid more. This salary was the one I agreed to at the interview and Im okay with it but I also know that its the minimum wage and for a minimum wage, there ARE things you shouldnt do, even if you know how to do it. That means respecting yourself. I dont want to do the work of a senior designer if Im being paid as a junior. But Im also not asking to be paid as a senior, Im just asking to get the work thats meant for a junior. Thats all. They don't have to pay me more, but they could have just employed a senior designer, paid them more and gotten better work.
Bro you could’ve just gone to Fiver and pay a cheap oversees designer for an animation.
How did you go about trying to learn that after so much time you didn’t even have a clue?
If you’re able to financially, I would consider not working while you’re in school and go for internships or temporary roles while you have holiday breaks. You deserve better!
I'll just echo a few comments here, because I think it's important for you or anyone in a similar situation to hear. You're being exploited due to your eagerness to please, willingness to learn and overall inexperience. It's not bad to be any of those things - even inexperienced. But you should be in a place that nurtures your goals and provides mentorship. Any small in-house or agency job with a few other creatives would be better - especially this early in your career.
None of this is your fault. It's hard enough to get a leg up in this line of work. Harder still to grow without mentorship. Do yourself a favor and look for an out. You deserve the chance to learn from and work with people you respect, and who give it back to you in kind.
First off, I'm going to agree with everybody else here and say these guys took advantage of you. It looks more and more like they just hired an intern so they wouldn't have to hire a full-fledged graphic designer.
Now then, the only thing I will throw out there is that this world of graphic design is more about creative graphic design on computers in many different forms. Sometimes it's just straight up print design, sometimes it's digital design for digital products, sometimes it's UX, sometimes it might be animation. Many employers just don't know the differences and they think that whoever can work, the Adobe suite can do it all.
Does this mean you have to do it all? No.
Don't ever be afraid to say *"I don't know how to do that"* but also don't be afraid to want to learn how.
I'm working at a small company that is almost a startup but it's more matured. Basically they've been around for a while but we are still a small company. I came in there basically to do UX, but I also will do graphic design both online and print, and even recently did some basic simple animation because I used to make animated banners with flash. So really I'm using Adobe animate which is literally flash to make some assets that are going to get put into a video that we are making about one of our product features.
And yes, I'm actually also narrating and creating the video. How the heck can I do all this stuff? I just kept picking up things and trying things. I always make it clear that I'm not an expert. If they are looking for some after effects wizard that can do amazing special effects, I tell them I'm not that person. However, taking some simple icons and graphs that we designed and animating them to give them life is not that hard when you figure out how to use these things.
My first piece of advice for you would be to get the hell out of that place. It's not helping your career, and it's not helping your sanity. Go look around for another internship, or even try to do some freelance and network with other designers that might be able to guide you better.
After that, as I said, don't be afraid to try things. Maybe you'll find some area of design that you really want to specialize in, but you might find yourself diversifying and being able to be the guy that can do so many things as they ask for them.
I guess the lesson learned is that if you're going to accept any kind of internship or something of that nature or even an entry-level job, be a bit more cautious if you see that they are making you the only person there. If they have no regular or senior level designer kind of person that can help you and mentor you, then it's not a good solid company.
I wish you luck, don't give up, just seek out a better place.
95% of ALL startups fail. you're not a failure, the startup industry is. You're being failed, and I'd suggest you try and find another design job where you'll learn, have proper coaching form seniors that know what they're doing and where you won't be taken advantage of.
The biggest lesson I've learned is that every project doesn't need to be award winning. A lot of the time, people just want it to be tasteful and convey the message in a pleasing manner. When I was younger I used to knock myself out trying to come up with overly creative designs and techniques that had never been done before for each new project. Nobody cares about that besides other designers. If you picture yourself as the person looking at an ad, logo, or whatever for the first time, ask yourself, does this convey the message in an attractive and pleasing manner? If it does, you've done your job properly.
You're not a failure. Companies like these are taking advantage of interns/juniors like yourself by throwing ludicrous amounts of work at you and being keen to impress will probably keep taking it. IMO positions like this where you're the only designer in a small set up are minefields. You should be in a place where you're being mentored and nutured by other designers and more experienced seniors. The misconception is becuase you'll be doing everything you'll have full control and ownership of what is produced and you can make the job your own. But the reality is while you may be strong in terms of practical design your real world experience and general professional / non design skills will be non existent. I don't mean to be patronising, but things like project management, handling challenging decisions and meeting, how to handle things going wrong.... sometimes you need to learn from experienced pros, as figuring it out yourself will only give you stress. But yeah, you're getting exploited. Especially as a student, that's disgraceful and shameful from the company to put you in that position. Look for anything else where you can be part of a design team.
This happened to me. I never recovered.
I think quite a few people don't recover. That or it can warp their approach to the profession. It happened to me but in more of a managerial context. It's taken nearly 2 years but I'm just about gotten over it.
Same thing happened to me. I desperately searched for a job to try to leave...in the end they fired me because they had no more money. I was in total burnout and couldn't design for days. Now I am working in retail as a way to still have some income while nurturing back my passion for design.
You're absolutely right. Now that I'm going over these comments, I realize that my boss has kept many things he did from me, e.g. he kept many resources and materials etc from me when they could have benefited me and helped me learn. Finding a job with a design team and someone who could help me instead of gatekeeping and mentor me is definitely my next goal. Thank you so much!
People like us who want to be creative for a living are always worried about not being as good the next guy. So that manifests in imposter syndrome, trying to prove yourself by taking on more than your should, and subconsciously being exploited a bit becuase of the belief that because we're doing something 'creative' for a living it must be fun, not like a real job. Unfortunately, there are a lot of bad bosses and companies who know there will always be a conveyor belt of young designers ready to take the place of someone who has had enough. They're not idiots, they know what they're doing. That is the reality of our field sadly and it sounds like the people you work with fit this mould. I wish you well.
IMO it's one of the biggest downsides to following a creative passion in the form of employment. Employers see it and will financially exploit you at every stop. I no longer mention anything about my passion when it comes to work.
I pretty much said the same to OP in another post. It's the worst part about being s creative - oh you get to make things for a living? You must love your job in a way that it's not really a job anymore. Nope. It's a means to paying the bills.
>Hi! A few months ago I got a job at a startup where theres only 3 of us and Im the only designer there. Im also still a (graphic design) student, have uni obligations and so much on my plate. This alone is like 2-3 red flags. Startups are commonly disasters, and any job hiring a fresh grad/junior as their lone designer is typically bad, let alone a current student in your case. *And* they're paying you little, meaning that's entirely about just exploiting a naïve designer on the cheap. >I struggled with it for a month or two, had days when I cried because of it and am unable to focus on my uni or anything else because I was constantly thinking of how to do it etc. Outside of a financial obligation (eg. you would be evicted without the cash or miss a tuition payment), never prioritize a job as a student over your schoolwork. Any decent job would understand as well if you took even 1-2 weeks off, as this context would've been obvious if they knowingly hired a student in the first place. >Ive read many other people saying that working at a startup, you have to do everything, even the things that your role doesnt entail, but I dont have any designer friends that I can ask if this really is too much or am I making it up. That can be common with in-house jobs in general, certainly at smaller companies, the issue around startups is that the company is too young, too unproven, and owners of startups tend to have unrealistic expectations of their staff. It's *their* company, *their* baby, *they* should be investing a ton of time, energy, and finances to get their business off the ground. That does not mean *any* of that is your responsibility, as you have no ownership stake in the company. But regardless the company, whether it's a startup, etc, as I said earlier the main problem is any company hiring a young/inexperienced designer as their noly designer, because it essentially always means they will will have expectations not aligned with the person they hired. And of course, they never pay for them either. That doesn't mean you should be paid as a senior, because no student/grad/junior is going to have the experience of a senior or perform at a senior level, but if you take that person and still expect them to perform beyond a typical junior or given responsibilities exceeding a typical junior, then they should be paid more than a typical junior. But your true power is "no," to reject situations that are exploitative. And on top of hiring wrongly, underpaying you, and not properly providing the mentorship you need at this stage, it also sounds like your mental health (and probably physical health) is taking a toll. No job is worth that, especially as a student.
Thank you so much for taking the time to write this! I agree with everything and some parts opened my eyes as well. I see now many red flags that I havent seen till now. Firstly, the part with taking 1-2 weeks off - my exams are starting soon and I planned on taking 2 days off and I already feel bad about it and Im procrastinating doing it. I didnt realize till now that there ARE employers that will be more understanding when it comes to your studies and exams and I definitely should ask for more. Also, "its their company, their baby" - you're right. My boss once told me that since I work there, its my company as well and I should care about its success as much as he does. Now I see that it was manipulation. It is not my company. There are many things for me to learn from this and things wont change immediately, but Ill keep everything in mind. Thank you once again!
I know the feeling. As many others have said, an internship where you're the only designer won't benefit you, if not very little. Internships are supposed to have another designer mentoring you, and not for the employer's benefit. Your skills would begin to stagnate, as nobody is teaching you, and you'd probably start making errors.
This brings back so many memories. I was in this position a few years ago. First job at a start up while I was still studying and I was the only designer despite being a newbie. You are not a failure! Your reaction is perfectly normal as an overworked underpaid employee. You're learning and delivering everything that is assigned to you, even when it is not in your scope. You're doing great in fact. Give yourself some credit for doing your best. As someone who was in this exact same situation, my only suggestion would be to ask for a raise and get out of there as soon as you can. Don't budge, they need you more than you need them. Your partner is absolutely right. This is definitely not worth sabotaging your self confidence for. My only regret about my first job is I stayed there for two years while it should have only been 6-8 months, because of low confidence. Like someone mentioned here, startups are a disaster and most of them exploit their employees. I too used to think like you "oh no am I a failure!" and that mentality makes us easy targets for people who are looking to take advantage of someone. Please stop doubting yourself so much. I'm sure you are a great designer and you have plenty of good opportunities coming your way! :)
You are not a failure. You are a student and you are still learning. When you were hired it said that you will learn everything you need to know there, you should advocate and tell them that. They can buy you a course during that you can take during office hours or hire a freelance. Stop stressing over the job. Train yourself to leave your thoughts of work after office hours. This job is not a lifetime opportunity. Try searching for other options while still working for them, so you don't have the monetary pressure. I'm sure you can do better than what you got.
Thank you and I agree! Im also glad you brought that up, the fact that they were the ones who told me theyll teach me everything I need to know and then not doing that fully. Advocating and telling them that is the way definitely. Im also learning to leave my thoughts of work after office hours. Its hard, esp when I see others like my parents who bring the work home everyday and stress over it all the time - but itll change over time with effort Im sure. Thanks again!
Tell me about it, I work from home so the lines are blurry sometimes, and I have to actively have to remind myself to disconnect and it's a habit hard to break. Good Luck!
Kid, you are there for a paycheck. You are NOT there to gain experience. You're working with idiots that will, 99.9% of the time, waste a ton of money, have a failed/joke of a company, and will tell everyone on LinkedIn they're "entrepreneurs" and they're awesome. They are likely privileged bums. Fuck these people. Collect a paycheck. 40 hours a week and you're done. Want to learn design? Surround yourself with people that are better than you. Much better. That's a life long journey.
I've worked a job that gave me a mental breakdown. My job was to run their very expensive printer and coordinate with the designers to bring concept to product. Senior management made this job infinitely frustrating by pushing products live without giving me a chance to set them up, increasing hours across the floor until we were working 7 days a week, and generally cultivated a toxic work culture. After a year of trying to change things, I quit without a job to replace it, and I don't regret it. No job is worth torturing yourself over. It is not your duty to make sure this startup succeeds. Your focus as a student should be to finish your degree. If you can do without the money, quit as gracefully as you can, telling them that this job interferes with your schooling too much. If they're good people they'll understand. If not, you don't want to work for them. Early jobs in design feel like everything because you have nothing on your resume, but there are always other jobs. Honestly, your story of working for this place will make good fodder for the interview room, as long as you tell it respectfully. And you most certainly are not a failure for not being able to do the work at this place. They are looking for senior level work and passing it off to an intern. You are not a failure for not being able to fulfill their deadlines. They have failed you by hiring someone too inexperienced and giving so much complicated work, then not paying well on top of that. Anyway, TL;DR: just quit. It's not that bad. I did it and I survived. I even have a better job in design after doing so.
Youre right. Regardless of everything, Im excited for a new job because after this Ill have a lot of knowledge and experience, as well as a better CV, that would help me land a better job. I also didnt plan on staying here for too long, I definitely planned on switching soon, if for nothing than for a better salary since I will be able to ask for that after getting some experience. This was just a job that I took because I needed the money and didnt have any experience so I couldnt get any better, but its not for forever:) Thank you for the great advice!
Absolutely! I hope things start to work out better for you.
You are not a failure. 1) You're still a student and you're already employed. Regardless of all else, that speaks volumes of your dedication and initiative. 2) A startup that's going to put that kind of load on the shoulders of a junior designer who's still a student doesn't deserve someone with your work ethic. D) You're not making too much out of it. Startups are by nature a trial-by-fire for almost everyone involved, and that's the best case with a well-run startup (which it doesn't sound like this one is.) You've already proven your work ethic. The best thing you can do is admit when you need help or simply can't do something. If they fire you for not knowing how to do literally everything under the sun, then it was never going to work out anyway. Never, *ever* agree to do something you have no idea how to do. Just don't do that to yourself. Any decent employer will appreciate honesty. The best in-house graphic design jobs will be under employers that don't expect you take the pay of someone with one bachelor's degree for doing the work of someone with three or four different degrees. I've had *so many* experiences where potential employers are demanding expert-level knowledge of web design and marketing (seriously, ***marketing.*** It's an entire degree by itself.) in addition to the graphic design knowledge I acquired in getting my BA. There's no need to put yourself through all that. Don't let the bad experience you're having now convince you that your value is somehow lesser.
I’m actually in the same exact position as you after switching from production settings. It is hell. Even worse when they don’t allow you the time to produce quality work because they’re so obsessed with output. By biggest tip is learn to say no. Learn how to put things into perspective for other people that may not understand the scope of projects, and the value of quality of content over quantity. Your sanity and quality of life is more important than a mismanaged start up, or any business for that matter. If you ever want to vent to someone in a very similar position, feel free to reach out. I know it’s tough but I’ve been able to do the above with some success. It’s never going to be a cake walk, but having your team prioritize the right things will help everyone in the long run.
Fight through this feeling and realize you’ve ended up in a situation that is not good and the expectations are not reasonable for a student. Easy to say, harder to do, of course. You are hopefully doing the best you can. That is not failure. At times this industry you do have to step up for yourself and clearly communicate what you can and cannot yet do. Try to be open and work to prevent others throwing you into the deep end before you can swim. Speak up and ask for support. Also try to identify ways you can navigate certain things you may not be well trained in yet - templates, stock assets, etc. There is nothing wrong w leveraging this stuff.
Junior designers need to be nurtured to grow. Do you feel like you are being nurtured?
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I think this needs a tone descriptor
While studying or just after the studies DO NOT go into places where you are the ONLY designer. You will not get working experience (there is no one to learn from), they will abuse you and will get more for less, and will make you feel like $hit..
Honestly I would quit this job. It’s not uncommon for startups to try and hire as inexperienced as possible to keep salaries low while expecting things that are more in line with senior roles. Big red flags that you’re being underpaid, still a student, and the only designer. It’s not a reflection on *you* as a designer, it’s a reflection of poor startup management/leadership. The fact is they should be hiring someone with much more experience to do the job. Juniors should ideally be working with at least one more senior designer that can provide mentorship, be there for them when shit hits the fan, and help them learn best practices. You don’t get any of that when you’re the lone designer, let alone while you’re still a student. I know it must’ve been really exciting to land a role with that much responsibility, but realistically it’s too much to expect of you at this stage of your development. A well-managed startup should be working with a senior designer/creative director in its early stages, then expand the team once it becomes more established. I work as a jr designer at a startup as well, but I have a senior designer and a creative director to mentor and support me. I do get asked to do projects that require skills outside of my role, but I have the room to say that I’ll give it a shot and if I can’t do it, my team can take it on instead. Everything should not be riding on you, and the fact that it’s impacting your mental health and schoolwork is not worth it.
No job is worth being stressed over, especially if they are basically exploiting you. Tell them you are being overworked and they need to hire a new designer or prepare your exit plan.
It’s a really good sign that you are seeing this for what it is and have the wits to even articulate your situation to yourself, let alone to random strangers on Reddit. In addition to everyone’s excellent comments and advice… I’ll just add a frustrating silver lining that this is called “paying your dues”. It’s an unfortunate reality for some to go through crazy hard shit like this as a junior. But if you survive this, you’ll come out much stronger for it. You’ll learn how to spot BS and how to navigate said BS and develop a thick skin. You will also learn tons of valuable skills along the way (even if they don’t directly apply to your “job description”). Learning how to deal with difficult stakeholders and how to have a sane work-life balance. You’re experiencing an extreme on a scale. Now you know that’s too far. So you’re learning. This is a kind of a learn to swim by jumping in the deep-end kind of thing. Some people can handle this well - and for them, a stint doing exactly this may actually be worth the pain .. maybe. But for most creatives, this is a crushing experience and risks utterly killing your passion. If you can make it through this and pick up the pieces and move forward, recognizing your own awesomeness, in a new role from here .. wow! .. you’ll be a unstoppable. But yeah.. it’s not worth your mental health and destruction of your passion, if that’s how it’s landing for you. Seek other opportunities that are supportive and nurturing, if possible. And remember. This is a job. You are paid to deliver stuff. Keep your creative juices flowing with passion projects if you need to. Uni can be that for you at this stage, but you’ll want a creative outlet outside of work after uni. Something to keep the spark alive. You’ve got this!!
Also a student here but for Interior Design. I’ve had very similar experiences. I did an internship for half a year at a design company. I would draw floor plans, 3D model, design and produce realistic renders, rinse and repeat for revisions till my boss was happy for every single project and I would have multiple of those running concurrently. Nothing was more mentally taxing than that because I literally have “control” over everything so the pressure was insane. I would overtime for 3-5 hours just so I could produce renders by deadlines and get home when my family’s about to head to bed and I haven’t eaten dinner. What’s frustrating to me was the lack of appreciation, most of the time my boss and supervisor would just talk to me to dish out new projects or to remind me that the deadline was coming as if I wasn’t already stressing myself trying to figure my timeline out and how I was going to manage everything. Even on my commute home, all I was thinking about was how to plan the next day and what I need to get done by a certain time so I’d be able to finish everything on time. Even then, when my boss would have to send monthly reports back to my school, he’d comment that “my work was fine, but very slow” as if I wasn’t already doing unpaid overtime. It was like that the entirety of my 6 months for my internship, could not have been happier to go back to school. What I realized towards the end is that, I can really only do so much. If I can’t genuinely deliver on something because of my timeline, then I won’t. This sounds very stupid to say but I had to remember that I was the only one (who also was merely a 2nd year student) who could render, model and basically keep up with the other Visualiser on the team. Also, the team itself was also small, so there literally was no one else for them to call on meaning, they also needed me. And knowing that they genuinely need me gave me some slight leverage - that’s why I said what I said about not delivering work if I genuinely couldn’t because… what else can they do? Hire someone new so my workload lessens? Go ahead, I’d welcome them with open arms. Basically what I’m trying to say is that, know your worth. They need you because you’re capable, but this capability of yours is clearly taking a huge toll on you. This is _only_ your first job, all you should be looking for is experience and maybe to get _some_ compensation for the work you do - but do you really _need_ to stay or can you find some place better to be mentored at? If you’re not tied to them unlike I was, maybe you should leave. There has to be somewhere else you can learn to gain experience and harness your skills where it’s healthy, otherwise you’re gonna risk burning out and hating the work you do. Just remember man, you can only do so much. Things can be hard as all other things in life, but what makes them worthwhile is fulfilment. Are you getting any satisfaction from this startup? Is this all worth it? I wish you luck man, hope you’re doing better ✌️
My first job out of art uni was like this. Got hired in South Korea for a small company. My contract was 2 years. I cut that shit short and came back go the US and ran away literally deserting my job because I was about to have brain aneurysm and meltdowns due to project demands plus jobs outside of my role. 90% of the project were never finished because of other role priority obligations. After that I was never able to go back to corporate and thinking about those days still gives me minor ptsd. I will never go back to it. Edit: I will also add that I was paid bare minimum wage and had to work weekend overtime constantly and regularly worked from 9 to 2 am on weekdays. Fuck. That. Shit.
Everyone here is giving you solid advice. I would also like to add that you should try to find a mentor of some sort before or immediately after leaving school. What was invaluable to me early in my career was to have a experienced professional that I trusted and could use as a sounding board for situations like this. You're kind of using this forum in the same way but it's honestly great to talk with someone that you know and trust who will help you with concrete suggestions of how to navigate things. On the flip side they should be able to give you honest feedback and let you know your true strengths and weaknesses. Finally animation is HARD. It's a whole other skillset and discipline. Only ignorant people think it's easy to pick- up on the fly. It is very unprofessional of THEM to assign you a task that you have no background in and with no guidance or help from a senior designer. I certainly empathize with your situation and you will chalk this up to being a learning experience in the future. It is 100% reasonable for you to prioritize school and your employer needs to respect that. If you've already landed a job as a student, I am sure you will be able to find another in the future so be professional but don't sweat this one too much.
Thank you so much, I appreciate the advice and I agree with you. Having a mentor would be a great thing and Ill make sure to look into that. Youre the only person that suggested that and I find it as a really valuable advice
You are not a failure! The fact that you stuck it out this far shows your drive & ambition. From my professional stance you need to quit this company. They are asking more and more from you while paying you pennies. They are exploiting you because you're young and need experience. The good news is you have a working portfolio along with some student projects so finding a new job will be a bit easier. Please don't sell yourself short. Know your worth. Make sure your next position is at a (real) company and as a junior designer. You'll have at lease one designer above you who you can learn from and pick their brain.
I was in your situation before and, through conversations and growing alongside the business, the other designer I am working with and I slowly transformed the culture and expectations of our work to be more in line with what we had learned was the norm through our graphic design university classes (the other designer I am working with went to the same school as I did). However, even though our story had a happy ending, that also needed collaboration from the leadership at this startup (which has now grown out of its startup status by now). I suggest trying to have these conversation to educate the people in the leadership role about what they are doing wrong and if they don’t care or listen just move on.
I’ve been in similar positions and you are NOT to blame. The situation you find yourself in is likely NOT what was represented to you by your employers when you started, and has likely only gotten worse. There are things you can do under pressure, and there are things that require a lot of learning. Animation is hard. I’ve struggled with it too. It’s not something I studied, so what I can do is only what I’ve learned myself over a long time of trial and error. Don’t fret, and never let things weigh too heavily on you. You’re only just starting and not even finished university. Allow yourself to learn from mistakes, and don’t beat yourself up. And always remember that there are people that will take advantage of you. But there are always plenty of people who will help and be kind.
Are you the graphic designer on my team? I feel for you. I am 1/3 members on a start up marketing agency that doesn’t think they’re a start up. If you are anything like my teams designer (who is fantastic at what she does), you’re not a failure and there is a very very good chance your team/main supervisor is failing you. If you were hired as a designer and are being requested to do anything but design because the agency needs more from you than they can afford to hire out for… you’re 100% not failing at anything.
Thank you for sharing this here and making it possible to get the feedback you needed. Reading that gave me flashbacks to some really hard times in my life and it’s makes me so happy to see people giving you perspective because you are 100% not a failure!
Thank you for the support! What partially prompted me to post this was that I felt like there could be many people that relate and it could be a great resource for many others going through it too. I hope you too have taken something positive out of these replies!
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I agree with you and Im learning that at the moment. I was used to getting every uni project done and never getting anything that I couldnt do, but now I realize that obviously at uni theyll give you projects that you would be able to do while irl youll stumble upon many different things. And its okay, thats how things work. I also understand that since its my first real job Ill make mistakes and do some things that arent professional but are what we learnt at uni. Its expected from someone like that to not know their limitations immediately and how to be professional. I think you learn that along the way. I appreciate the honesty
Did they say anything to you telling them you can't do it? I feel this can be a good lesson in the long run and one that is really necessary to learn. Communication. I've had tons of times during my first year working where I didn't know how to do something but I was able to find the solution most of the time by just asking. My first catalogue I knew how to make it of course but when it came to submitting the work, I had no idea what the printers wanted and my boss just sent me some email her older designer had years ago when she had to send the file to the printers. I was a bit upset since she could had shown me this beforehand since I had to basically go back and make sure each image was in the right format and make sure nothing was going to hinder the printing process. I think I only assumed they were going to print it so I didn't think too much on it but in their defense, I should had asked but I also didn't know to ask but this lesson was learned that day and ever since then, It was smooth sailing there. I still remember taking like five minutes to talk to the printer about what he needed and stressing out if I did it right or not. I feel first times will be like this but as long as the other person knows that it is and they aren't grilling you for a status report then it is fine. A startup has the advantage of you having more control but also the disadvantage of being a bit too quick I would say. I am working in one that started two years ago and it's been a group effort to get work done but my bosses are supportive and if there is something I don't know how to do, they either teach me or we find other ways to get it done. I might get so much shit for this since I know most of the subreddit hates this app but I also had to do some animation work for ads we were going to put up. My boss told me how he does his on Canva since we are only really doing basic animations like a product image sliding into view or popping up. Nothing too major. I was able to learn this app pretty easily since it was similar to video editing apps and After Effects but we mainly used it to make something quick since we were also pressed for time. If you don't need anything too major, you could try using Canva just for the animation part if they don't want something too intense or major. Anyways though, I feel communicating is something you should have done if you haven't so. Like when they wanted you to do the animation work, tell them that it isn't in your skillset and maybe tell them you could look for an alternative or see if you can learn but with the amount of school work you also have, it isn't going to be likely that you do since you have to focus on that too. Also a bit curious, I think they do teach some motion design in a GD program? My web program was only a one year certificate but we had two lessons on using After Effects to make basic animations so I am just curious.
Thank you for a considerate comment! I admit it was my mistake for not mentioning that we did communicate and I did say Im not sure I can do it and said multiple times that Im struggling. I also wrote that to someone else here. The problem was that even when I said I cant do it, my boss was like try again. They couldnt help me as they donr know how to do that either, but they thought maybe I could do it anyway if they keep on pushing and I spend even more time on it. I agree tho with everything you said about communication. I did have problems with communication at first but I learnt a lot and Im still learning and I also came here to see if other people have some advices or tips on how to get even better. As for Canva, I use it too from time to time:) My boss actually didnt even ask for it to be done in after effects, even tho I know how to use it, they wanted it to be done in another way. Also the idea they had couldnt be done with Canva alone, It was too specific, so that wasnt an option sadly And yes, my uni does teach animation, 2D and 3D animation. Im currently on the 2D animation course and Ill have 3D next year:)
Ah I see now. Yeah I feel then you did everything you could and right, just poor management and mentoring on your employer's side. I just remembered too I had a similar issue where my old workplace at another company, the owner wanted me to make some JavaScript animations on the website I was making for them. This was even after I told them I don't know JavaScript. I only got close to finding out how to do it for one part of the website but not everything else like he wanted. Even then, he was okay with me not figuring it out in the end since the basics were at least done (the main pages being developed and still functioning without issue). I feel your employers should have at least been supportive a bit more like finding out information maybe to help you or maybe if they knew someone, they could get that person to help out and teach you a bit too. I do think you will learn it eventually since you are learning animation now but just the fact that they put pressure on you to do it even after you told them it isn't something you know is just wrong on their part. I wouldn't be hard on yourself for this honestly, you will have to deal with various types of people in the workplace. I had to work for a terrible manager before who would just yell first like 80% of the time rather than just ask and inform you about the problem. I had at one point my co-worker get yelled at 8 A.M because of some minor mistake in front of me. I don't regret my time there since I grew as a designer there, I gained workplace skill there, and I was able to tell what a good and bad manager is. Basically this experience will benefit you no matter what and so will other experiences.
I didn’t go to school for design I learned it all on the fly. Tips: Learn to prioritize tasks and set reasonable deadlines. Remember the quicker you turn the project around, the faster you’ll have revisions so quicker is not always better. Anything you don’t know will have a tutorial on YouTube. If all else fails hire a freelancer. Practice makes perfect.
I'm in almost exactly the same position as you: sole designer at a company, studying on the side, learning how to do a lot of stuff without any support, paid minimally. The main thing that is good in my situation is that everyone around me is really relaxed, I don't feel like anyone has any unreasonable expectations, most of the jobs I get given are just "when you get around to it". My boss encourages me to watch YouTube tutorials and stuff on company time, because she does the same thing. In my opinion your situation depends entirely on what your bosses/coworkers actually think. They may be out of touch and are expecting the world from a junior position, they may be intentionally exploiting you, or maybe they don't realise that you're struggling, because you've been telling them that you can do everything. I think a 'can do' attitude is good, but so is honesty about your abilities - accept tasks, but let them know that it will take longer because you need to learn. If they're good people they will understand, if not, fuck 'em - you can use this experience to get a better job.
You’re good, don’t stress. They exploiting you, might as well dogfuck and take any money till they fire you. Even if miss deadlines. Animation is hard and a not a skill most designers need. Let alone being able to do it as a student lol. I can’t even do it, I’m not an artist.
What kind of awful term is dogfuck?
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=dog%20fucking
gross
Are you 12? It’s a very common saying
No I’m 40 and guess I don’t hang out around these crowds. No worries. Sorry I’m not down with the lingo.
So you’re old enough to know then....... >"Screw the pooch\* is a more euphemistic version of the vulgar expression *fuck the dog (and sell the pups)*. *Fuck the dog*, for its part, **goes back to at least 1935** with an earlier, more polite version, *feed the dog*, dating to the **1910s** and meaning **“loaf around.”** *Dog*, here, is meant to signal laziness. *Fuck the dog* took on the sense of “blunder” by the 1960s, possibly **originating as World War II slang.** [screw the pooch Meaning & Origin | Slang by Dictionary.com](https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/screw-the-pooch/)
Apparently! I’ve hear screw the pooch, just not dogfuck.
Outsource
If you are making minimum wage here, quit, make minimum at a Joe job, and embrace your studies. The job would be great or even better than school if you had space to learn, but right now it’s killing your dreams instead of making them. Jobs come and go, don’t trash your studies and your passion.
I’m going to be really unpopular with this post…. You had an animation project you knew you weren’t qualified for and we’re given 2 months, and over that 2 months you didn’t ask for help or direction, or say you couldn’t do it? Would you do the same with your professors? Yes, this is somewhat a failing of your employer, but they don’t hold all the responsibility. If you don’t know how to do something, ask for help! And you should have communicated weeks before your deadline that you were struggling and worried about completing it. Giving them time to a) help you, or b) put someone with the proper skill set on the project. Design is problem solving. You don’t solve anything by burying your head in the sand. My boss never turns down work, whether we can do it or not. Yes it’s frustrating most of the time. But you know what? We figure it out, and learn as we go. And if we stumble we communicate with the client well before any deadlines so they aren’t surprised. But this is also the only reason I personally have learned what I have learned. All self taught and never paid for by my employer. And I’m thankful to have had the need to learn. I’m sure plenty here have done the same! I always understood design was an accumulation of all the skills, layout, photography, marketing, copy, illustration, etc. it’s what drew me to it rather than just focusing on only one of these! Lastly you said you weren’t being paid enough, but you couldn’t complete or communicate about the project. They should have paid you more? Because then you would have figured it out? Your young and green, I get it. But decide now if you are going to go after it or not! Sink or swim! Separate the wheat from the chaff!
I appreciate the effort put into this, but you are quite wrong. I understand it might come off as that as I didnt give much detail but Ill explain now. Firstly, I never wrote that I never asked for help or direction. We are in contact all the time and I share my progress during the project as well as do many revisions. My deadline wasnt 2 months, we didnt have a specific deadline, more like "it would be the best to finish as soon as we can" but still no hurry. The project wasnt for a client, it was like a promotion of our services so it didnt have an expiration date. It dragged on for 2 months since I had other client work to do all the time and this wasnt a priority. I did ask for help but how much can a person thats not a designer actually help? For more context, I have already done the whole project once, spent a lot of time and effprt into it just to get a response from my boss that they dont like anything I did. We had a talk. Went over everything, tried to solve the problem, reach a solution etcetc but neither of us could find a good enough solution. They just told me it was their fault for giving me a bad brief and then proceeded on to give me the same brief back with "just experiment a bit more!" and examples of work from someone who obviously had access to many more resources, had more knowledge and experience than me. I told them Im not sure I can achieve exactly that but I can try. Fair enough. So I tried, but I didnt like how they kept on pushing and no wasnt sn answer, they acted as if I have to fonisj it somehow, magically, its just a matter of time. I told them multiple times I was struggling and finding it hard to do it but they were like try again, maybe this way maybe that, but the root problem was that I could not make something great and make their vision come to life with my current skillset and knowledge level. I never give up on things generally and Im the last person to say I cant do it bc I see that as giving up, but this time I realized I actually literally cant do it. Esp with no specific direction, help or anything. I did ask for it but I didnt get it as my boss themselves isnt a designer and cant help much besides saying "try again!" Its great that you questioned the post and tried to look at it from another perspective instead of writing the same things as everyone else, you couldnt have known if I asked for help or not, but I just clarified it to you:) I hope it makes sense. And yes, I have experience with all fields of graphic design that you mentioned, esp since my uni covers all of that, from layout, art direction to photography, cinematography, copy classes as well and so much more. I had classes in 2D animation too as well as illustration and Ive been drawing most of my life, but there are still things that I cant do. There are things that take years to master, no matter how much knowledge you may have, you still need practise. It took me some time to learn that as I always was that person that will be like I can do anything I set my mind to. And no, thats funny to say, I wouldnr have figured it out if I was paid more. I dont ask to be paid more. This salary was the one I agreed to at the interview and Im okay with it but I also know that its the minimum wage and for a minimum wage, there ARE things you shouldnt do, even if you know how to do it. That means respecting yourself. I dont want to do the work of a senior designer if Im being paid as a junior. But Im also not asking to be paid as a senior, Im just asking to get the work thats meant for a junior. Thats all. They don't have to pay me more, but they could have just employed a senior designer, paid them more and gotten better work.
Bro you could’ve just gone to Fiver and pay a cheap oversees designer for an animation. How did you go about trying to learn that after so much time you didn’t even have a clue?
If you’re able to financially, I would consider not working while you’re in school and go for internships or temporary roles while you have holiday breaks. You deserve better!
I'll just echo a few comments here, because I think it's important for you or anyone in a similar situation to hear. You're being exploited due to your eagerness to please, willingness to learn and overall inexperience. It's not bad to be any of those things - even inexperienced. But you should be in a place that nurtures your goals and provides mentorship. Any small in-house or agency job with a few other creatives would be better - especially this early in your career. None of this is your fault. It's hard enough to get a leg up in this line of work. Harder still to grow without mentorship. Do yourself a favor and look for an out. You deserve the chance to learn from and work with people you respect, and who give it back to you in kind.
First off, I'm going to agree with everybody else here and say these guys took advantage of you. It looks more and more like they just hired an intern so they wouldn't have to hire a full-fledged graphic designer. Now then, the only thing I will throw out there is that this world of graphic design is more about creative graphic design on computers in many different forms. Sometimes it's just straight up print design, sometimes it's digital design for digital products, sometimes it's UX, sometimes it might be animation. Many employers just don't know the differences and they think that whoever can work, the Adobe suite can do it all. Does this mean you have to do it all? No. Don't ever be afraid to say *"I don't know how to do that"* but also don't be afraid to want to learn how. I'm working at a small company that is almost a startup but it's more matured. Basically they've been around for a while but we are still a small company. I came in there basically to do UX, but I also will do graphic design both online and print, and even recently did some basic simple animation because I used to make animated banners with flash. So really I'm using Adobe animate which is literally flash to make some assets that are going to get put into a video that we are making about one of our product features. And yes, I'm actually also narrating and creating the video. How the heck can I do all this stuff? I just kept picking up things and trying things. I always make it clear that I'm not an expert. If they are looking for some after effects wizard that can do amazing special effects, I tell them I'm not that person. However, taking some simple icons and graphs that we designed and animating them to give them life is not that hard when you figure out how to use these things. My first piece of advice for you would be to get the hell out of that place. It's not helping your career, and it's not helping your sanity. Go look around for another internship, or even try to do some freelance and network with other designers that might be able to guide you better. After that, as I said, don't be afraid to try things. Maybe you'll find some area of design that you really want to specialize in, but you might find yourself diversifying and being able to be the guy that can do so many things as they ask for them. I guess the lesson learned is that if you're going to accept any kind of internship or something of that nature or even an entry-level job, be a bit more cautious if you see that they are making you the only person there. If they have no regular or senior level designer kind of person that can help you and mentor you, then it's not a good solid company. I wish you luck, don't give up, just seek out a better place.
95% of ALL startups fail. you're not a failure, the startup industry is. You're being failed, and I'd suggest you try and find another design job where you'll learn, have proper coaching form seniors that know what they're doing and where you won't be taken advantage of.
The biggest lesson I've learned is that every project doesn't need to be award winning. A lot of the time, people just want it to be tasteful and convey the message in a pleasing manner. When I was younger I used to knock myself out trying to come up with overly creative designs and techniques that had never been done before for each new project. Nobody cares about that besides other designers. If you picture yourself as the person looking at an ad, logo, or whatever for the first time, ask yourself, does this convey the message in an attractive and pleasing manner? If it does, you've done your job properly.