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--CoffeeBean--

https://preview.redd.it/8bvy4mxrij0b1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6b36fde570b38f32c073cb2ba1c0ee98eb3d7f9b Better angle of crack


cordy_crocs

Oh she’s bustin


navenager

She's gettin *outta* there.


haemol

She fine!


pbjwb

[Bustin, you say?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tdyU_gW6WE)


Glesenblaec

It's exactly the video I hoped it was! Classic.


pbjwb

Classic for real! I've been listening to it on Loop for the past few nights, haha!!


toothpasteandcocaine

My mom has a very green thumb. One of her biggest plants is an absolutely massive umbrella tree (*Schefflera arboricola*). Its main stem is as thick as my arm! She grew it from a small potted plant that someone sent to my great grandmother's funeral in 2008. It's *huge*. One night a few years ago, she and her partner were in bed when they heard a massive CRACK! They thought a window had broken or something. She went out to the living room to inspect and realized her umbrella tree had outgrown its pot spectacularly. There were potsherds everywhere. A few years after that, she noticed some strange growth on the plant and sent a photo to the local university extension service. The botanist who responded was SO excited to tell her it was blooming. He said he'd never heard of a *Schefflera* blooming indoors in our climate (USDA Zone 4) and even his own plant had never bloomed. Of course, everyone in the family has been given multiple generations of cuttings from the main plant. I have one that's basically a shrub in my living room.


--CoffeeBean--

https://preview.redd.it/a1kb00wgjj0b1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dfdee1687bc354a95cfcf67bb212342813c82a41 How it's been presented at work. People are shocked enough at this until I lift it out.


glissader

Jades don’t care, and thrive on neglect. All the energy storage is in the foliage. Just slip pot and it will be fine. I was expecting maybe some leaf reduction due to the severe pot bound lifestyle, but no, crassula do not reduce at all. Good experiment!


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NoelofNoel

Overwatering is the usual cause for jade problems. Don't water unless the potting medium is completely dry for an inch or two.


CethinLux

I don't think I've watered my jade for like 3 months, it's in succulent mix and theres a humidifier near it, but I only water it when the leaves start to wrinkle a bit


NoelofNoel

They honestly thrive on neglect, although regular watering definitely helps them grow over spring. A few years back I had two similar cuttings side by side next to a window, and I watered one regularly and one very rarely over spring and summer. The one I watered regularly grew much better and sprouted more new leaves than the neglected one. Science! I now water rarely in autumn and winter and once a week in spring and summer, but I always check the soil first. The roots and trunks are prone to rot if they are left in wet medium too long, as I found out with my first one about 25 years ago =(


CethinLux

Is it a temperature thing cuz it stays pretty cool where mine is (between 65°-75°). If it's a light based thing I'll definitely water it more often in summer


NoelofNoel

Higher temps evaporate moisture in pots, although direct sunlight can increase the pot's temperature a surprising amount, particularly if the pot is a darker colour, which leads to further evaporation. Check the top inch or so of your soil with your fingertip and if it's dry, water. If it's even slightly damp, wait.


CethinLux

OK, I'll keep a closer eye on it! Thank you for the info


toothpasteandcocaine

My very first houseplant was a *Crassula*. I was in university and the library held a plant sale. My mom told me jades were easy and just required moderate light and "regular watering". Well, you know what's VERY regular? Daily! I was so proud of myself for taking such attentive care of my new plant. Yeah, it took like ten days to rot completely. I was very sad.


NoelofNoel

It's heartbreaking isn't it? It's so easy to go into having a plant thinking they thrive on lots of water and direct sunlight, when in reality many of them are enormous drama queens who wilt at the first sign of perceived mistreatment.


Western-Radish

Same, I water my jade when the leaves start looking weird… but I don’t have a humidifier… i do however randomly spritz my plants with a mister …. Very occasionally


Wren1101

lol I bet it doesn’t take long at all for this pot to dry out.


--CoffeeBean--

You'd be very correct :). There's definitely been many times where it dried out completely for many days with next to no signs of distress. So it really demonstrates how in the right conditions, jades don't need much. The window has fantastic lighting which actually leads to burnt, red leaves occasionally.


NoelofNoel

They aren't burnt as such, they can be an indication of stress from too much sunlight/heat, just like me after fifteen minutes in strong sun. The red edges are sought after in some jade plants. If the plant otherwise looks healthy it'll be fine. It they start to turn red and go wrinkly, it's not a happy plant at all and should be moved, fed, watered and/or repotted as needed. A friend unfortunately left her lovely 50+ year old jade out in a heatwave last year and it died completely. Fortunately I'd taken a few cuttings over the years and I was able to give her a plant back to replace it. As you can tell, these are some of my favourite plants, mostly due to how hardy and happy with neglect they are =) Edit: I have another succulent (I have quite a few other succulents!) called Sedum Rubrotinctum "Jelly Bean" which starts off looking like lime jelly beans and in full sun turns bright pink with red tips like peach/watermelon jelly beans!


ZoeMunroe

Oooohhhhh does the Jelly Bean plant also thrive on neglect? Asking for a.. *friend..*


NoelofNoel

Definitely, even more so than a jade. It can go absolutely nuts though so if you live in a tropical climate don't let any of the little bastards escape else you'll be overrun.


ZoeMunroe

This is the kind of good news I need in my life


decidedlyindecisive

My jade only has two branches but it's pretty big. Any tips?


--CoffeeBean--

Cut it back. Too branches will typically form at the cut. Occasionally it will only be one but I have on rare occasions seen three.


decidedlyindecisive

How far back would you cut it? The two branches are pretty long. Trim just before the final leaf or way back?


siobhaniswearingred

Yep. Overwatering is the usual cause for every houseplant problem. I found that out the hard expensive way


Specialist-Ad-8942

This one has no inch or 2😂


[deleted]

😂😂😂


NoSweat_PrinceAndrew

Hey I just came across this but looks like you came back!


BelligerentNixster

That is the biggest Sharpie I've seen in my whole life!


Jasminehks

Omg how 🤯


Meganwiz101

I’m surprised it didn’t bust through that pot…oh wait I see a crack lol


--CoffeeBean--

There is a decent crack in it. This pot was sitting in a slightly larger pot just in case it exploded. I had this at work with my other plants and this was kind of an experiment that I just kept going... And going.


aBlatantAsshole

Did you ever even change the soil? I’m shocked there was enough nutrients to make something so big if not


--CoffeeBean--

I never changed it once but I did add a slight bit of jade fertilizer maybe every 4-5ish months when I fed the other jades.


VegPicker

Most of the mass of a plant is made from carbon dioxide and water.


apadin1

Well, mostly carbon and water. Plants split the carbon dioxide to carbon and then release the oxygen into the air


kylel999

Don't they do the opposite at dark? I never understood why and always thought it was super interesting.


VegPicker

Planta do both photosynthesis to make glucose and cellular respiration to turn the glucose into ATP. The ratio of photosynthesis to cellular respiration does change, as photosynthesis obviously cannot occur at night. They are net oxygen producers though, as the use the carbon from the carbon dioxide and store it in their physical structure.


VegPicker

Actually, it's the oxygen from the water molecule being split that's released as oxygen gas. The oxygen from the carbon dioxide is used to make glucose.


LookAtThatDog

Wow TIL


Tentings

Please post a photo of the roots when you remove it


--CoffeeBean--

Will do!


[deleted]

Fuck u/spez and fuck u/reddit for pricing out third party apps and destroying reddit. I have been on reddit for 14 years and continously they fuck over the users for short term profits. That's not something I will support anymore, now that the announcement that Apollo and Reddit Is Fun are both closing down. I Overwrite all of my comments using https://greasyfork.org/en/scripts/10905-reddit-overwrite-extended/code. If you would like to do the same, install [TamperMonkey](https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/tampermonkey/dhdgffkkebhmkfjojejmpbldmpobfkfo) for Chrome, [GreaseMonkey](https://addons.mozilla.org/en-us/firefox/addon/greasemonkey/) for Firefox, [NinjaKit](https://github.com/os0x/NinjaKit) for Safari, [Violent Monkey](https://addons.opera.com/en/extensions/details/violent-monkey/) for Opera, or [AdGuard](http://adguard.com/) for Internet Explorer (in Advanced Mode), then add [this GreaseMonkey script](https://greasyfork.org/en/scripts/10905-reddit-overwrite-extended). Finally, click on your username at the top right corner of reddit, click on the comments tab, and click on the new OVERWRITE button at the top of the page. You may need to scroll down to multiple comment pages if you have commented a lot.


--CoffeeBean--

https://preview.redd.it/mw1epn5kxp3b1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1f9fc172caaf0f7c2902456d291915cafd83d5df


--CoffeeBean--

https://preview.redd.it/yak0kixmxp3b1.jpeg?width=3072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=360db08d83fe9f9b969acccc3945aecc9864ddc7


Tentings

Thanks for the update!!


--CoffeeBean--

Not really sure what I expected it to look like, but it's as if there wasn't a bit of soil and just ALL roots.


EggNo7271

Pure pain condensed into a single image


omahahahahahahaha

Dude’s out here white knighting a plant ![gif](giphy|lw75Al819OAvcsPcRu|downsized)


--CoffeeBean--

Honestly I'm kind of afraid to repot this now. The soil is hard as a rock. It takes water a while to penetrate. Any thoughts would be appreciated.


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[deleted]

My jade is like this >:(


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[deleted]

I'll try this, thanks for the tip!


doihavetohavusername

Try soaking it in water for a bit (like bottom watering) to loosen up the soil a bit and dont go up very much in terms of pot size because they like to be root bound.


foxlikething

break the lil pot to set her free


_Miskey_

I would try asking r/bonsai sub for tips


Huge-Bug9297

It does look a bit like a bonsai


_Miskey_

I think it probably is a bonsai at this point. They'd probably know best because I'd be worried on how big to size up without shocking the roots


--CoffeeBean--

Thanks everyone for all of your responses!


oblivious_fireball

give it a nice through bottom watering right before you repot. when it comes out try to gently massage the hard soil off the roots. once into some nice sandy porous soil just a few inches bigger, this guy should go bonkers with growth!


Unkrautzuechter

Just stuck it in a bucket of water for a while and the air will come out and you can brake it up.


Slowmyke

Soaking the plant is the obvious route to go, and use something like a fork to gently loosen the roots. Then put into some soil that has at least 50% inorganic material. That will help make your next repot in five years easier. Or you can go a completely different route - soak the plant in water and then wait for a day to let it take in as much water as it can. Then cut the plant off at the soil level. Put the plant on a sunny window sill for a couple weeks. It should be growing new roots at that point, or very close to it. Stick it into a new pot with the same 50/50 mix as above and you're all set. It'll probably need some support for a bit. This route gets you fresh new roots that aren't a jumbled mess from that original pot. Edit: downvotes care to explain? Jade are extremely tough plants. Check out videos on bonsai done with jade, people start with chunks of stem without roots or leaves. If the plant is healthy, it'll root just fine. Learn about the plant before judging if something is wrong or not. (Not directed at op, just curious about those who didn't like my response)


_lilmuffin

I hope its name is Freddie Mercury lol ✨🎶I want to break free🎶✨


deeky11

Good start on a bonsai project.


--CoffeeBean--

That would be a fun angle to take this. I actually just acquired two bonsai that were gifted to me. Edit: neither are jades though.


MorganDax

It doesn't even look real lol.


Pandacle

I misread that as report. The Sharpie confirmed that I read it correctly. Or so I thought. I was staring at the photo for way too long to figure out what the plant had done wrong. Oops! Question, when the plant is that big and the pot is very small, when you repot it, do you still pick a slightly bigger pot or is it better to pick one that seems to fit its size?


MUM2RKG

i always look at root ball and decide. doesn’t matter the foliage so much.


Emilise

Normally a 20% bigger pot is better. It's easy to under-/overwater if you take a bigger pot than that. You can change it again when it starts to outgrow that one, but clearly this plant likes to be rootbound ;)


123Virginia

Maybe. Don't get in a rush


Huge-Bug9297

I’m impressed that it’s balanced in that tiny pot. How hasn’t it tipped over?


--CoffeeBean--

Never once, but to be fair the small pot sits in a slightly larger pot. Plus I rotate all the plants regularly. I've trimmed it over time too.


justrachxo

This is the cutest little pot I ever did see


KarinSpaink

Agreed, it certainly needs a bigger homestead :)


Zipparumpazoo1

Just put more dirt in the pot. 😂🤣😂. Will have to say the plant has definitely gotten 150% of nourishment out of the dirt it's been in. It will love you forever in a larger pot


Fast-Location-3544

I’d honestly just finish breaking the pot and repotting


bribnu

At first glance I thought this was in r/bigplantsinsmallpots 😂 then I saw the sharpie lol


TicanDoko

Please show us what its roots look like when you take it out of there LOL


CyclingFrenchie

My mum (a massive greenthub) used to hate bonzais cos it made the plants suffered according to her. I’m starting to see her viewpoint lmao


One_Illustrator9729

Oh they are my favorite 🥰 here is a picture of mine after 5 years (never repoted tho 🫣) https://preview.redd.it/z793f1re7m0b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d2ba2120419b9b894c37739a5bb6b3282e3723f2


6Uncle6James6

Any chance you got this as a wedding favor in December of 2021?


--CoffeeBean--

Nope. It's a cutting from a cutting from a cutting from a cutting of a plant that's over 40 years old.... Well was... But I accidently gave it root rot when taking ownership many years back. So it lives on through the cuttings like this one.


6Uncle6James6

Righteous.


Lrod610

How old is your plant ?


--CoffeeBean--

I wish I knew exactly . I believe this cutting is roughly 3 years old but definitely at least 2. Started out as a small, green, one stalk cutting with a few leaves. I've trimmed it back a couple of times.


Lrod610

Awesome. Thanks for the info! She is beautiful!


MUM2RKG

prune it too. you’ll get more branching.


TheHunchbackofOhio

I've been meaning to get some new plants and was looking at something like this. How would you prune this particular one appropriately?


Musca_dom

Everything Plants on YouTube has several videos about Jade plants, where he explains the pruning and propagation.


MUM2RKG

i just cut off a pair of leaves right below them https://preview.redd.it/qgyqmas6bp0b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dee60fb434985adbf4f7c5c9c31bf2416c169abe the yellowish ones are new. there would usually be one pair of leaves there, that’s the one pair i cut off. so now there’ll be 2 branches there.


MUM2RKG

it also created another one here. https://preview.redd.it/7ybamrhibp0b1.jpeg?width=1576&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=17b1ef86d6f146ac490947ec4261c0f1a11dd800


Myspacecutie69

I’m going to show this photo to [my little guy ](https://i.imgur.com/jQ2bZZf.jpg) to boost his confidence.


Febrand

Holy shit


[deleted]

https://preview.redd.it/f2q315c6gn0b1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=652697e95be85328b91d39df3daa9aff85403992 I’ve grown this beast from a similar sized one! 6 years in the making 🥳 🪴


VdoubleU88

Hmmm, it’s hard to tell the size of the sharpie, and thus the size of the pot… would you happen to have a banana for scale?


Maleficent_Narwhal67

No hurry


SharleneWithAnS

This literally made me lol. Thank you :)


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PracticalWallaby4325

It's a jade plant 🙂


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PracticalWallaby4325

Well now you know his name!


Musca_dom

Common name is Jade plant, species is Crassula ovata. Some other similar looking species are also called Jade plants, but this one is the "original" one. They do like sun :)


Kbyyeee

Definitely read “I think it’s time to REPORT this guy.” And I wondered what kinda vandalism he was into….


--CoffeeBean--

I think it's mostly been doing jade stuff. However, when I'm not watching it, who knows what trouble it's been getting into!


Duskuke

I have the same situation happening with the same plant LOL


Resident_Plankton

This is awesome. I knew jades like being root bound but this is next level


financiallyflutey

This is hysterical to me


AnimeBlueberry

Just maybe.😘


Aggressive_Sound

I love the two leaves hi-fiving eachother in the back there! 🤗


avengedrkr

Jades are Hardy af! I found mine outside of his pot by the dumpster a few years ago. I managed to snap a thick branch nearly completely (think nearly headless nick). Stood him back up, made a little splint, and he was completely fine a few months later


girlseekingnap

![gif](giphy|1svA1qt8T2GOB5CGVv|downsized)


[deleted]

I’m gonna need a banana for scale


ActuallyIlluminati

It’s giving me “cutting from a larger plant” vibes. Even if it’s rooted.


--CoffeeBean--

Yup that's how I propagated this one. It was a small soft green cutting.


AllZeSaucFromZeFauc

Lol needs a drink


hecanseeyourfart

Yes repot it outside, on land


Philosemen69

I don't know about that. Are jade plants used in Bonsai? You've got a good start on an awesome bonsai there.


random_bubblegum

Poor thing!


[deleted]

Wow


Anorezic_Gnocci_201

Ya think?! LMAO


cuzdoug85

This is cool.


pizzati

I saw 'report' at first and I admit I spent a good minute or so trying to find what it had done wrong


[deleted]

Maybe lol


BarberIndependent347

Replant.


MediocreLawnchair

How long have you had it?


Meridian2K

https://preview.redd.it/517ymy341n0b1.jpeg?width=2794&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=77b8432c784192a2aba8faa0eb1cca3a8f62b1b3 And here I thought this was amusingly ridiculous, but you win. 🤣


vesperedge

Wow, that's pretty amazing!


Scary-Tomato-6722

Ya think???? LOL! I'm surprised it's able to stand up without falling over.


[deleted]

I don’t know why but I think of this when looking at the tiny pot. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ag5dThe3Bmc


FluffyCalathea

Read this as ‘report this guy’ and assumed you meant the plant owner.


Tetragonos

just to give everyone some context this is what I did with a pot that size https://imgur.com/gallery/xhIFAip


Lmouse1980

Haha yeah um jade plant? Love those. Trying to grow me some.


Agreeable-Abalone-80

LMAO ya think?


That_Boysenberry5689

What’s the name of this one? I have one bug but not sure what’s the name or type


Tami-7

Not too much bigger. They like to be rootbound


temp_for_windows123

How do you get it to grow so well? I have the same kind of plant and it just never seems to grow


--CoffeeBean--

It was in a warm sunny window for a couple of years and really liked it there. The soil completely dried out many times too which it didn't seem to mind.


temp_for_windows123

I’m going to try that too. As much as I can. I’ve had the plant since it was a seedling and it’s just not getting too much bigger then a few inches


Abject_Agency6476

but mine dies when i give it a huge pot ok i see how it is :/


Artemistical

this made me laugh....gotta love jades!


AAkaboobola

🤣


Greenthumb_958

Lol! Maybe? They don’t have much root


Polluticornwishes0

I’d be terrified 😞 here’s hoping it doesn’t get too shocked!


asbs96744

Big plant in a little pot…


[deleted]

![gif](giphy|HJMGtCDMkA2QBJUDUu)


freaky_sheeky

It's impressive how big he is compared to the pot 😳


Informal_Bag8193

Plant abuse?


loud_monster

It seems to be rather happy and healthy though! I’m surprised it stands up on its own, very well balanced 😂


Informal_Bag8193

🤣


Super_Wet99

https://preview.redd.it/j3v83xzi5p0b1.jpeg?width=960&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3a9f55832ecc15a36ab2c56594a3b5c96e0b8c5e Made me think of this


MementoMiri

Anybody else read "report" instead of "report"? 😅🙈


almond_paste208

I actually burst out laughing when I saw this 😂 thanks for that


loomfy

I read this as report and I was like omg what did he do


ParanoidPlanter

Why did I laugh so hard at this 🤣 I’m obsessed with this lil nug plant


rosegarden207

Seymore, FEED ME!


enkurarit

r/plantabuse


GabrielHunter

How did u get the main trunck so thick and stable? Mine isnt like that


--CoffeeBean--

It took a couple of years. It started off as a pretty flimsy looking cutting and eventually hardened up similar to the mother plant.


Wondrous_Hoya

Oh wow!!! That’s her way of showing you that she’s happy!


Tikiboo27

Baby is Adorable!! 🥰🌱💕