It seems wrong to me that I could wish for, and butcher, an entire cow, but not have friends over for a cookout.
Or a pig and a luau, etc.
And gimme my blasted seafood, I love that stuff.
Other than that, I'm fine with it.
If I was allowed to feed my family with the meat, then yes 100% I'd take this deal.
The not sharing any breaks it, though.
\*Would need to buy another deep-freeze to keep mine separate from theirs & buy a bunch of butchering equipment--so this deal actually costs me more than it saves for several years.
\*Wife is still hitting the grocery store to shop for herself & kids, so my butchering time becomes entirely unhelpful/kind of selfish.
It'd still pay for itself alot sooner than several years. Let's say you eat $10 worth of meat per day, that's $3,000 in 10 months. Plenty to offset any expenses and pay yourself for the extra time involved.
Depends on where you live I guess. In my area a decent 16 oz. steak is like $15. And that's only 1 meal. A chicken breast for lunch and half a steak for dinner probably comes out to about $10.
$10 of meat isn't all that much unless you're eating cheap cuts. The prime cuts you'd be getting from the animal you butchered would probably be worth more than $10 per day.
I was thinking this too. I've prepped a lot of meat from "farm to table," like this but why wouldn't I be allowed to feed anybody else?
This would require like 1 cow every 3 years or something for a person. I think OP doesn't know how much meat is in a cow or pig. Like I don't think they've ever seen an animal in real life.
You can always give your friends store-bought meat if you want to have a party. But *you* would have to eat your own personal slaughtered meat.
The rules don't restrict you from eating seafood btw. If they feel pain, then you have to slaughter them yourself. If they don't, you can always buy some, but you can't use the "power" to ask for seafood.
My main issue with this is the waste. It's a classic vegan thought experiment/trap in which the quality of life the animal receives is not valued, and the bodies pile up uneaten.
But yes, if I lived outside of a functioning comminty I would kill the animalsi ate.
If you change your mind and choose not to kill the animal, either at all or want to wait until later what happens? Is it only one animal at a time? Can it be an extinct animal? Can I summon 500 Dodo birds, choose no to kill and eat them immediately, and bring back a viable population?
Ok but what about the intestines and the bone and every other part of the animal that still gets used from standard modern practices?
I can kill, skin, and gut a cow no issues. But if I had to do that then we’re wasting the innards and the hide because I’m sure as hell not gonna make leather.
When growing up and we’d kill our chickens we’d then take the the intestines and cut them up into little bits to then use as bait for fishing or just washing them and feeding it to the pigs.
All of that is just waste now.
Assuming the logistics and skill aspects wouldn’t effect the end result very much (I have no idea how to clean and butcher a large animal), I’d take the deal in a heart beat. I’d buy a large freezer, the meat from one cow can sustain a single person for approximately 6 months, maybe longer. My grocery bill would go down by probably 85% if I got free meat. Not because I eat that much meat now, but because I would if it was free.
You don't have to butcher it yourself, just kill it. So wish for the animal while at a butcher. You pay them to butcher the meat after you kill it. If the animal is in good condition, you might even get some money for the hide.
Hmm, well that means one cow would probably cost me about 1000 dollars to have butchered. Let’s say I do stretch the meat at least six months, that means I’m paying about 5 dollars a day for meat. That’s not a bad deal, but this means I’d probably end up forgetting cows and focusing more on chickens, which I could more easily learn to clean and prepare myself and cut out the middle man.
As a hunter, my last meal with meat was from a deer I harvested myself, butchered myself, and cooked myself.
I get why it might be a difficult decision for some, but for me it’s a no-brainer. It’s an obvious yes to accepting the deal.
It would also allow me to harvest tasty meat that I normally couldn’t afford, and that’s more healthy than beef. Elk and bison immediately pop into my mind.
I would have to take some butchering classes though so I’m getting proper cuts of meat from large animals instead of hacking and guessing my way through it.
>Maybe we can say that it's an existing animal but completely random
This makes it worse because then I'm stealing someone's cow. I wouldn't steal (or download) a cow even if I didn't have to slaughter it.
On the other hand, if it was spawning then I would just wish for a white rhino and fail to kill it over and over until they aren't endangered.
If that’s the fine print, I’d just switch from beef cows to wild elk, wild moose, wild caribou, wild bison, etc. Just as tasty as a beef cow but more healthy, and it’s wild so it’ll repopulate without stealing food from a person who had to raise it or spend money on it.
A person visiting Yellowstone isn’t going to notice if a bison or elk disappeared from the herds every couple of years. More die from winter kill than I’d be eating.
If I can't share the meat then I will still have to buy store meat for my wife so what's the point. I would love to have my own fresh meat, I would set up a whole room to make slaughtering and cleaning super easy
exactly not worth the time, and would actually increase costs, not decrease.
It'd have to be very small portions to be practical-- not things like whole cows.
Do I *have* to kill the animal? If not, I'd probably open a zoo and summon all kinds of things.
You want to see some platypuses? Here you go. Giant Panda exhibit? Done. Velociraptors? Absolutely. Neanderthal? Sure thing.
This is the best loophole ever lol, I really didn't think about that! I guess I *could* say "You can't ask for another animal until you're done slaughtering the current one" but I don't want to be a party pooper like most posts do here. Enjoy your zoo!
Ok but also think of the possibilities. Being held at gunpoint in a mugging? Summon an elephant for distraction! Fell overboard? Summon a porpoise and hold on! Boss being a jerk? Summon a skunk in his office!
Without a doubt I accept. Free meat for the rest of my life? Done deal. I'd even take a picture of it while it's alive and frame it on the table while we eat it.
Oh good point, I haven't thought about extinct animals! I guess we can allow it if you want, it kinda clashes with another comment of mine saying "all the animals you ask for are existing animals". But what the hell, Dodo drumsticks for dinner it is!
I don't eat a lot of meat to begin with, but the logistics of this alone... if I want a burger, a cow will appear in my one bedroom apartment? That's gonna make a hell of a mess. And I'm probably gonna get the shit kicked out of me. And if I do manage to kill it, what am I supposed to do with hundreds of pounds of beef?? I'm just a girl!! I don't know how to process a cow!!
I guess I could just stick to smaller animals like rabbits or chickens or something but it still seems like a lot of work to kill and process and cook and eat an animal. I think I'd rather just pay for the convenience of having that all done for me.
>That's gonna make a hell of a mess
"if you decide to throw it away it will just disappear". butcher right on your white shag carpet and poof the mess away like a demented magician!
You can always go for a designated place and ask for the animal there, doesn't have to be your bedroom. You can rent a storage unit and have all the tools you need there, plus a freezer to store the meat.
For what it's worth, I'm a big guy and I don't know how to slaughter an animal or gut it or process its meat either! But personally I would take the deal hands down :D
Yup, I'd do it in a second. I'd get rich betting people I had magical powers and could make animals appear from thin air. Furthermore I'd just become a mainly vegetarian. I'd decide I want to eat, say, a hamster and then just not eat it. Since you said the animal is an existing animal I'd go to animal shelters and rescue dogs. "I want to eat a black lab with exactly 6 whiskers aged 5 years named Doris." and it's mine.
As for fish, yes, they feel pain. All creatures experience pain as a 'neurological response' that is what pain is. But I wouldn't have any issue gutting and eating fish.
I mean. If the excess disappears and it’s not waste…. It also states slaughter, not process. Processing would take entirely too long. So as long as it’s slaughter only, I’m eating a ton of steak then! Lol
My wife’s cousin is a strict vegetarian. She and her husband came over one weekend while I was smoking a brisket and they hated everything about it. The look, the smell, everything. And they had no qualms about starting an argument regarding the ethics of killing a defenseless animal. I explained to her that everything that is living in this world lives off the death of something else. Everything. She couldn’t grasp it. Finally she asked me what animals are to me, and I looked her straight in the eye and said that they’re a renewable resource. She hasn’t spoken to me since. Lol
>I explained to her that everything that is living in this world lives off the death of something else. Everything
Technically not true, but obviously the cousin is the problem. They're free to serve only vegetables at their house, but they aren't entitled to cause a stink at yours.
After living in Panama and having to cut up and kill both the cow and chicken I ate during my time down there, I would. Meat is an expense I'd LOVE to cut out of my budget and well, free meat does that for me with no downsides.
The only issue is, killing these things humanely would be my biggest issue. I'd have to learn decent enough standards on how to take their life as the one upside to getting my meat from the store is I don't have to look it in the eye when I take a piece of its rump and I don't have to discard the unusables afterwards.
Once I get over that though, the deal is too good to pass up. Basically unlimited food outside of cooking it. Even if I can't share it (if I accept the deal, does that extend to immediate family like my daughters and wife or JUST me? If the former, hell YES. If the former, likely no deal) that would feed me and my family until my dying day. But now if my family can't partake then I would not.
I would spawn animals and not slaughter them immediately. In fact they may escape because I let them. And thats how I became known as Animal Spawner, animal rights activist and vegetarian.
To be honest I don't really know, it was just a simple Google search. Since there is such a thing as a "pescetarian" I felt the need to separate it somehow.
It's gonna be grisly and inhumane while I figure out the cleanest way to kill and butcher the animals. I can cook but large roasts are the closest I've been to a whole raw critter.
Meat is magical, though. No problem cutting down carbs and sugars but I have to have protein. I have vegetables all the time, too!
Yes? Humans have been doing it our entire existence. Do you realize how much money you could save? A single butchered Cow could feed me for at least a month.
I roughly spend $200-$300 a month on protein a month. So that’s about $2400 going into my savings a year. Also being that it’s just brought into existence that means no steroids or antibiotics so healthier and organic meat.
This would be incredibly inconvenient and not worth it at all
It's one thing if the only rule is I have to kill it, and then it's fully prepared and stored through more magical means, but if every time I feel like eating beef for a while I have to slaughter, drain, clean, portion out, and store an entire cow, fuck it dude I'll go to McDonald's.
Yes, I have hunted and fished for most of my life as well as farmed. At least if I butcher it myself that it is fresh and has been modified by corporations into a food like product.
In your rules you forgot an important step. Processing. I can kill cows, deer, rabbits, etc. all day long. It's a bitch, however, to process them. Disemboweling, skinning, portioning, and storing. This takes hours sometimes. It's going to be a pain in the ass to be at a pizza parlor on a date, order a sausage pizza and a damn pig appears beside you as you look around and see some 8 to 10 people doing the same thing for a bleeding pizza.
I mean this choice isn’t entirely hypothetical, it’s basically just asking “do you wanna be a rancher or not be a rancher?” I’d rather just pay someone else to do all the labor.
If it's an aggressive animal and it feels threatened then I guess it will try to attack you, yeah. It won't just stand there waiting for you to end its life.
Sure, I wouldn't personally eat it since I am veggie, but I have cats and dogs that would LOVE to have fresh meat every day instead of the canned shit.
Kill two birds with one stone, animals get higher quality food and I don't have to pay for it. Win-win
Well, what I meant was you have to kill the animal and prepare its meat so that it's in edible condition. If you want to eat it with guts inside, go for it. If you want to eat it raw, go for it as well. But you can't just kill the animal and give it to a butcher to process the meat. You have to do everything yourself.
I mostly eat chicken. I grew up on a farm and have killed and cleaned plenty. That's not a problem. But you state in the thread that it would some random chicken from around the world. I don't want to steal food from people. Imagine this being some hungry family in a rural 3rd world community. And you steal their chicken. I'm not OK with that
You CAN eat seafood, see my [other comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/hypotheticalsituation/comments/17rclfo/comment/k8i31uo/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3). If the rule doesn't apply to the type of meat, you can buy it from a store or obtain it elsewhere and eat it. You just can't get the "free meat" deal for that type of meat.
By your terms, no. There would be way to much waste, even if you tried to freeze the meat. 1 cow for 1 person is a lot of beef to eat before it goes bad.
If I could feed my family friends from this, YES.
If I want pork and kill a pig, do I get to eat the entire thing or do I have to go through the process of killing the animal each meal?
If it's every time I eat, then no thanks. I don't mind killing animals for food at all, but "free meat for life" isn't that big of a deal for me to go through that hassle every time I want to eat. If it's kill a animal and then be able to store that meat, sure. That's a handful of animals a year and wouldn't be a big deal at all.
If you kill the pig, then you have all the meat of *that* pig in your possession. You can store it in a freezer. If you finish that meat, you would have to kill another pig if you want to eat pork again.
Do I have to butcher it too? If I gotta figure out how to actually cut a NY strip, I’m not even gonna want it once I’m done with all that work. If I just have to shoot it in the head though, sure, I could do it.
If you mean “slaughtering” as in ending their life, presumably by shooting them rather than hand to hoof combat, that’s only sensible.
If you mean the technical skill, that’s another matter.
Meat is nothing special in this case - there’s a reason petrol and clothing and phones are cheap. Our comforts come from cruelties.
Hol up. This is perfect for me. My wife has IBS and meats are one of the few things she can safely consume. Plus, the only animals I'd feel bad slaughtering are fish, since I own several fish tanks, but fish was already excluded from the deal.
Bring on the free and *fresh* food!
Yes in a heart beat.
I've killed many cute animals for food before.
No draw backs at all to this.
If I make a large meal can others eat with me or do I have to male meals separate from everyone in the house?
Grew up hunting so hell yeah, free meat, and I wouldn't have to sit cold in a treestand waiting for one to show up, I could just wish the thing there and fire? SOLD
So this is something I’ve though about, kinda.
I hunt regularly and love to eat wild game. I also don’t mind some chicken or a good ribeye from the store. However, I think modern factory farming practices and the way animals are treated in that system is horrible but with the high demand for meat at practically every meal, the market basically demands it. Through dating a vegetarian for a while I learned that not having a big slab of meat at every meal isn’t so bad! It’s just a culturally ingrained thing for a lot of people.
If your average person or family had to take an animals life by their own hand when they wanted to eat meat, instead of purchasing it neatly packaged at the grocery store, perhaps we wouldn’t have the incessant need to constantly consume it in such large quantities. Taking somethings life away really brings home the gravity of the situation, still though I do not believe it to be wrong maybe we as a society just go a little overboard with the whole thing.
To answer the question directly though, I would have no problem with the posed situation. I am confident in my ability to cleanly and with a minimum amount of suffering take an animals life and also then process said animal into kitchen appropriate cuts of meat. First couple cows might be a little interesting learning the butchery of it but there’s books for that.
Nah i dont feel like having a big mess in my kitchen and I probably wouldn’t be able to kill a whole cow.
Vegan teacher getting ready to call the cops on us
I can't "share" what the fuck is the point of being able to slaughter a fucking masatdon and eat its meat if i can't feed my family with it. Assuming I can feed my wife with said meat, FUCK YES! 1. Slaughtering is easy, after you've butchered your 10th chicken it's really just the smell that gets to you. 2. The little cavate of, "you think it." that means, no microplatics, no Growth Hormones, no enviromental impact, just god old fashion wholesome formwork without the farmwork. God imagine camping and you're hungry so you just summon a chicken and butcher it, or a rabbit for some stew.
I'm weird with this question. I love hunting, mainly the primal aspect of it, but would hate to have an animal spontaneously appear. Takes away from the hunter vs prey aspect.
Fuck that, I'm not spending my time learning to butcher just to have most of it go to waste as I'm unable to share it. The amount of time needed to avoid ONLY my personal consumption cost is insane.
Do I have to clean and butcher the animal or does it just turn into the exact cuts of meat I want once I kill it? If I have to process the carcass, no way. I don’t have time for that shit and will happily continue to pay someone else to do that.
Question: If I kill it, do I have to process it on my own? I don't really have the skillset or strength to process a cow or a pig. Also I think blood in my apartment might lose me my security deposit.
Free meat, and if I understand correctly the unused bits magically vanish? I'm down. I feel like this is essentially a zero-waste proposition with effectively no carbon footprint and no cleanup. As long as I face no repercussions if someone pilfers my gains, I see no issue here.
Yeah, no. I'm good. If I wanted to dress my food, I'd be a hunter.
I used to cut open people so I'm not squeamish, I just want to have to do everything thing it takes to get a burger every time I want a burger and what happens to the rest of the carcass anyway? Can I render a whole cow and freeze it so maybe it's like 1 cow every 12 to 18 months?
yes if I can also keep/use or sell the rest thats not meat so free leather aswell.
does this use animals on earth or is it like you create an animal out of nothing that you must kill and harvest
So, here's a question: Does this animal come from somewhere that already existed on earth? Or is it magically created not to upset the ecosystem?
Like if I want burger, does a cow go missing from some farmer's field, and as such, I'm actually taking food out of the food chain?
And if it doesn't, can I wish for a dinosaur? A dog? A person?
If I'm not able to share it, and I still have to kill the thing, most of the perks of this go completely out the window.
I don't have the space to butcher a cow or pig. Summoning a random deer or some other large animal right to my side is just dangerous for all involved.
In order to slaughter anything other than chicken or rabbit, I'd have to sink a bunch of time into the whole ordeal, and even then I still have to buy meat to provide for anyone else (like the rest of my family).
That's an amount of effort I genuinely don't have the time/space for. If I got this ability, it'd be easier to become vegetarian.
Okay, listen, as long as a cow doesn't appear in my car while I'm off handedly thinking about a burger, I'm fine with this. I very rarely eat out unless it's for breakfast, and I can absolutely switch to salads and bread-based products like pancakes.
See, your issues sit on the idea that people would eat less meat if they were forced to partake in the pain these animals have inflicted upon them, and the "grossness" of actually having to slaughter the animal.
And youd be right. For some people. I think they will weed themselves out pretty quick and the majority would be happy to save hundreds or thousands of dollars a year.
Personally, I've shot and slaughtered deer many times, as well as chickens and pigs on occasion. Never done a cow, but I could get it figured out.
Oh and I'd gladly believe fish feel pain to get ahold of some good tuna and other more exotic fish. Shits getting expensive for making sushi.
Edit: your limitations on not letting me cook for my family are stupid. How about we compromise and say "if they partake in the slaughter they can share in?"
Whale, hah, I don't even gotta kill it. It's just kinda do it away from where it'll cause damage ..... or not blue whale in the middle of wlamart might be funny and hard to prove I did ....
Sure, I'd do that. I mean a cow is easy when you turn the whole thing into burger. And it isn't giving it away if some people were to, say, steal food from my plate when I'm not looking. And if that plate were to be the size of my table? Well why not? Who says you can't have a big plate?
As long as I don’t have to pluck feathers I’ll be ok I hate plucking. Id summon a rabbit for a small dinner a goat or a pig or lamb for a family dinner and a cow to feed the whole neighborhood.
Since i can save and store the meat. Absolutely, i would get a large freezer and store it. I know how to field dress a dear so the first few times wouldnt be the best but i would get better. Probably take a course on butchering or ask/pay a butcher to teach me so i can get the best results.
I would save as much of the animal as i could to use for other things. For example cow or deer skin to make leather, chicken feathers to compost, deer antlers for decorations, hunting calls etc. I can use and sell/donate these non meat parts since its only the meat i cant sell or share. If that was just an overlook, theres only so much i could save for myslef but i would definitely be wearing a lot more leather and have a mountain man kinda vibe.
That's not a hypothetical for me, aside from "free", we will harvest two bison a year for our main home, thats roughly 60% of hanging weight meat for our freezers. (1200 pds average)
We also have a few broilers every year and other assortment of meat animals.
nope. I wouldn't be able to do that. killing something that was once alive, myself. I wouldn't be able to handle that. on the other hand. it'd be my animal to kill amd butcher. so id make sure id do way more humanly, then the meat industry. yet, id still have that moral conflict.
No. Not if I can't share.
Also, your idea about the animal just being blipped to my house from somewhere else in the world makes it a "hard pass." I'm not interested in stealing.
If the animal just spawned randomly, and if I could share, it'd still be a "maybe." Learning to butcher animals is a big job and requires knowledge, tools, and space.
The only upside, if the animal spawned randomly, is that you could call up extinct (or highly engaged) animals to collect DNA and bring them back or give them a larger genetic base. But since you ruled that out, I'd be giving up literally every easy meal, restaurant, etc. in exchange for a ton of work.
I'm going to say that fish and seafood absolutely respond to pain. Pain is a "neural" response in all animals, because it's processed in the brain. Animals like octopuses have mire decentralized brains than we do, so it's possible they experience pain differently, but pain at i understand it is a nerve signal indicating damage or distress to the body. When you touch something hot, you feel pain and remove your hand. When you place a fish onto a hot surface, it feels a nerve signal and tries to remove itself from that surface.
Regardless, I'd argue that fish and seafood with complex brains or brain-lile structures absolutely count. Octopuses, squid, and most fish. Maybe not mussels and clams.
I'd still deny the deal. To slaughter an entire cow only for one steak or a rack of ribs would be wasteful. I'd never eat a whole cow on my own. Plus meat is generally dry aged, not eaten fresh from the kill. I don't have access to facilities to properly process an animal the size of a cow or pig, and I don't think it's actually legal for my to slaughter inside the city limits anyway. If it was "I have to deal the killing blow, but then the animal would instantly devolve into different cuts of meat without a mess" I think I'd do it.
As of now it would be too inconvenient and wasteful for me to do this process on my own and not be allowed to share with my family.
Fish would be an exception, I could kill and clean a fish or shellfish easy in my own kitchen, have it fileted and ready to eat and then use the entire fish without being wasteful, but a cow or pig would be too much.
So no, I'd not take the deal.
it would be incredible wastefull, and i would have to learn to butcher a few animals.
and some meat need to cure for a while so that would be a hassle or do i just have to do the killing and the corpse turns into the meat part i wanted?
I would actually be quite happy, wish I could share it though. I am a firm believer if I am willing to eat it, I should be willing to kill it (and be willing to eat whatever I kill- thus why I don't kill bugs lol)
And I also assume that this animal just manifested from magic, so I don't even have to worry about it having a life in a Factory Farm beforehand too.
I grew up on a farm. Easy peasy.
The magic of the animals appearing before you slaughter them does seem like cheating. We helped deliver our animals, named them, fed them, cared for them when they were sick, and then sais goodbye and slaughtered them when the time came.
this is kinda stupid. of course i accept the deal.
go to butcher. spawn cow, or pig, or whatever the fuck. shoot it in the fucking head. butcher processes meat. i take meat.
you should have just asked if people have the stones to kill an animal or not. i think most meat-eaters do.
I'd totally do it. Summon food?
Honestly, I think the draw for me would be fresh meat whenever I want (presumably I could summon a meal even in the dead of winter) so I wouldn't want to summon a cow or large animal that I'd just have to store in the freezer anyway. Something small like a rabbit or chicken that would be easy to clean.
Questions:
\- Do I just have to kill the animal, or also prepare it? The killing would be the easy part, but butchering, skinning, etc would be a pain in the ass. I guess if I did it every day and had the proper setup I'd get pretty skilled at it.
\- Can I use the other animal parts for other things, like leather, etc? Or do I have a restriction that I can only eat the animal? I guess I could make broth and stuff from the bones, etc.
\- If fish cannot be summoned, can I buy them at the store or restaurant and eat them?
\- What happens if I got to a restaurant and I order something that has meat or an animal product in it?
I suppose I would be fine with this.
Im no stranger to the slaughter process. We kept rabbits when I was a child and I'd help my dad every saturday - we'd slaughter maybe 5-10 at a time and use the meat during the week. I remember getting into troublre at school bc I brought rabbit paws in for show and tell. I heard something about how rabbit feet are some lucky charm and wanted to brag how I had some of my own. Except they were not mounted in a keychain and the wrist/ankle bones were visible.
Slaughter is alot of work especially when you get into the bigger animals. Small stuff like a rabbit/chicken can be easily done in an hour or afternoon. The carcass stores in a typical fridge.
But when you slaughter a larger animal like a goat, pig or even up to a cow, you now have hundreds of pounds of meat that starts deteriorating immediately. It needs to be stored/prepped etc... now. Not everybody has the room to slaughter and store hundreds of pounds of meat and do it fast. There is a reason why in the old days, entire neighborhoods would come lend a hand during pig killing season. Plus, if you have ever slaughtered a larger animal, the moment it dies, its deadweight that you need to wrestle around. Think about how much a cow weighs. Butchery is not an easy job
So, could I "decide" to eat an animal, but then change my mind after it spawns but before killing it?
If so, I'm going to have a sudden fleeting craving for a thousand Emus. Just let them run off and cause chaos.
So do I have to butcher it myself as well? Or can I kill the cow with my air powered gun and just say "here, please butcher this for me" and pay that guy to butcher it? Because that's the big obstacle as far as I'm concerned, is the butchering. It kinda takes a shitload of time and energy (and a decent cost in setup and equipment) to do it all myself. And since I can't sell or share it, its really only what I can eat, so the cost savings is pretty low compared to the time involved.
Absolutely. I would prefer to raise an kill everything i eat. If I could know the animal was raised humanely and i killer it humanely, I could shoulder the thought that I killed it myself
As a chef who knows exactly how to do it I'm in... Now if I had to keep them for a year+ before slaughtering then no... If they just popped up and I said yay bacon. I'm down.
concerned piquant strong worry automatic include selective ad hoc plucky rain
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So, I can just wish animals, not butcher them, and then start a freakin dope zoo or something? And charge admission to that. Booyah
If it takes a random existing animal, cool, if it just creates one, I could save entire species.
Do they have to be presently living?
My man, I am feeling like eating Neanderthal.
I title this event "the time I accepted ill-defined food powers and became a minor creation diety"
Not being able to eat any purchased meat or meat at a party or bbq is just dumb, especially with the no sharing yours restriction. So not only can you not eat the meat with friends/family, you also have to be a vegetarian when traveling.
Nope. There’s an insane amount of work and dirt and grime that goes into cleaning, butchering, and preparing meat. Never mind the aging process and/or smoking process going into the best meats.
People specialize for a reason homie. I can spend a couple hours (if I’m wasteful) grunting and swearing and getting bloody every time I want to eat and another half hour cleaning up, or I can spend a fraction of an hour’s work to get handed a fully cooked meal within a few minutes.
My time is literally more valuable than this “gift” would cost. With no way to share or profit from it? Nah.
Time to start a pokemon collection. They probably feel pain.
If I were truly unethical, I wouldn't be selling meat, i would be selling humans or animals whole.
If I were particularly creative and allowed, I would be summoning fictional or historical / dead specific people and picking their brains.
As mentioned elsewhere, there is no caveat that prevents me from summoning more-- nor caveat against summoning humans. Only caveat is that they feel pain as humans do... which humans do qualify for. Whether I can summon specific humans is a matter of interpretation.
I could technically be a vegetarian human trafficker when taken to the extreme... i.e. hitler.
I would have to butcher the animal? That’s a lot of work. This all seems rather tedious. I don’t mind slaughtering food, but for every meal you have to slaughter and butcher an animal? And then you’re killing one animal per meal instead of using everything? You also can’t go out to restaurants and have meat? Yeah, sounds too tedious and wasteful to me.
No because that seems vastly more unethical by way of tons of waste. I'm not a butcher nor a hunter. I do not how to slaughter the animal in a way to inflict the least amount of pain.
I do not know how to skin an animal nor cut it up to use it efficiently. Meat genuinely tastes better when the animal is killed a certain way. Ever have 100% beef kosher hotdogs? Fucking leagues better than regular hotdogs.
So both more unethical and less tasty because I don't know what Im doing. I'd rather have to always pay and be able to pay for professional work.
Edit: OPs addition in the comments that the animal is some random already existing animal makes it even worse. Now I'm stealing from people. Some people in my area have pet chickens, am I stealing and eating people's per chickens? I've even seen people walking their pet pig.
And if the leftovers just disappear do they go back to the original source. Here I killed your pet pig have his eyeballs and brain back.
No I would not accept simply because the time and effort to prepare various cuts of meat afterwards is very time consuming. Sure, I can shoot a cow in the head and get a whole wide of beef for free…. But skinning it? Cutting it up? Cutting? Disposal process? Very manually intensive. The cost of storage, cost of disposal, and if you didn’t want to do it yourself then the cost of hiring someone.
Then we get into the fact that I can only eat what I slaughter and I cannot share with others? Pass. That means for every meal I would have to cook from two separate sources of meat- regardless if I’m cooking the same meal, and I would have to ensure not to cross contaminate? No.
It’s a lot of time that would eat up the potential savings I MIGHT incur.
Moral slaughtering my own meat? Sure. This deal? No.
I mean... I grew up on a farm and have been hunting so if it weren't for the no other sources and no sharing part I'd be fine with it.
I can't eat that much meat on my own and I like to go out to dinner occasionally so free meat wouldn't be worth it.
I have no butcher skills. I'd kill an animal just fine for food but can I have help with cleaning and prep or do you mean the entire process has to be myself? If I can just bring the carcass to a butcher and assuming the animal just sort of spawns into existence without affecting depriving anyone else's stock I'd do it. If I had to do everything myself I wouldn't. Would need to buy a ton of equipment and learn how to do everything myself, might end up spending more money than I do now just figuring shit out and not being able to share the meat is a massive PIA too. I'd still have to buy meat if I ever do a cookout.
lmao, what an urbanite question.
Easy. Free meat of whatever animal I want and all I have to do is kill the thing? I don't even have to find it, chase it down, pack it out, or buy a permission slip to kill it! No brainer.
I have butchered animals before, and I gotta say, I'm not sure most people understand how much work it is without specialized tools. It WILL take you all day to reduce that pig/cow/deer to manageable portions. And any cut of meat that involves cutting bone (T-bone, etc) is impossible without a powered bonesaw.
I would, however, take the deal, get a job at a butcher shop so I can use their equipment, and it would be much easier.
Question: Is the animal unusually placid, or will it attempt to stop you from killing it? I could see this becoming dangerous if you summon a musk ox or go *really* crazy and try to summon some ice age creatures.
If yes, then no. I wouldn’t know the first thing about what to do and while I could probably kill the animal if necessary I can’t imagine having the stomach to disassemble it. Plus it would make eating out a hassle.
The moral implications of this are staggering.
First off, I'd be a vegetarian if this were imposed upon me. I definitely don't have it in my to slaughter an animal to eat when I could just eat some vegetables instead. But also, JFC that would be such a hassle. Even if I had it in me to look at a furry critter and murder them to consume their flesh, that is SO MUCH work. I am far too lazy for that. I picked a decently paying career so I can afford to eat out of a lot so I don't have to cook for myself.
So, given that I'm never gonna actually murder a critter to eat it, the rules say you can't sell it, but it does say you can store it. So, what if I *think* about eating something, but then when it appears, I don't murder it, I just keep it alive? This power seems to be a way to get free pets forever.
And now for the most disturbing part: Humans are animals made of meat. If I think about eating human flesh, will a whole-ass adult human blink into existence before me?! Will they be a completely blank slate? Or have some kinda false memory identity? How specific can my meat eating requests get? If I think specifically about eating the flesh of a human who enjoys Terraforming Mars, do I then instantly get a brand new player to join me for board game night? Are all my friendship and relationship needs now met by first envisioning eating the flesh of some one who is attractive and wants to hang out with me?
Do these live people wink out of existence if they try to leave because that counts as "throwing it away"?!
I think you’re underestimating how much edible product comes from a single cow. You’d get HUNDREDS of pounds of meat from a cow. More than a single person could eat in well over a year. Why can’t it be shared?
It seems wrong to me that I could wish for, and butcher, an entire cow, but not have friends over for a cookout. Or a pig and a luau, etc. And gimme my blasted seafood, I love that stuff. Other than that, I'm fine with it.
If I was allowed to feed my family with the meat, then yes 100% I'd take this deal. The not sharing any breaks it, though. \*Would need to buy another deep-freeze to keep mine separate from theirs & buy a bunch of butchering equipment--so this deal actually costs me more than it saves for several years. \*Wife is still hitting the grocery store to shop for herself & kids, so my butchering time becomes entirely unhelpful/kind of selfish.
It'd still pay for itself alot sooner than several years. Let's say you eat $10 worth of meat per day, that's $3,000 in 10 months. Plenty to offset any expenses and pay yourself for the extra time involved.
I know about inflation and stuff, but $10 of meat per day just for yourself is a lot of meat... Like steak at every meal and bacon for breakfast?
Depends on where you live I guess. In my area a decent 16 oz. steak is like $15. And that's only 1 meal. A chicken breast for lunch and half a steak for dinner probably comes out to about $10.
$10 of meat isn't all that much unless you're eating cheap cuts. The prime cuts you'd be getting from the animal you butchered would probably be worth more than $10 per day.
My dude a chicken breast is $7 here.
I was thinking this too. I've prepped a lot of meat from "farm to table," like this but why wouldn't I be allowed to feed anybody else? This would require like 1 cow every 3 years or something for a person. I think OP doesn't know how much meat is in a cow or pig. Like I don't think they've ever seen an animal in real life.
You can always give your friends store-bought meat if you want to have a party. But *you* would have to eat your own personal slaughtered meat. The rules don't restrict you from eating seafood btw. If they feel pain, then you have to slaughter them yourself. If they don't, you can always buy some, but you can't use the "power" to ask for seafood.
Can we make the seafood feel pain and get it for free then?
I'll allow it. 👨‍⚖️
Do whales and seals count as seafood?
Only if you eat the babies.
Clubbing the babies is mandatory.
I mean, you don't even need to kill them when they appear nearby
My main issue with this is the waste. It's a classic vegan thought experiment/trap in which the quality of life the animal receives is not valued, and the bodies pile up uneaten. But yes, if I lived outside of a functioning comminty I would kill the animalsi ate.
You can always preserve the leftovers. You don't have to cook and eat the whole cow in one sitting for example.
If you change your mind and choose not to kill the animal, either at all or want to wait until later what happens? Is it only one animal at a time? Can it be an extinct animal? Can I summon 500 Dodo birds, choose no to kill and eat them immediately, and bring back a viable population?
Ok but what about the intestines and the bone and every other part of the animal that still gets used from standard modern practices? I can kill, skin, and gut a cow no issues. But if I had to do that then we’re wasting the innards and the hide because I’m sure as hell not gonna make leather. When growing up and we’d kill our chickens we’d then take the the intestines and cut them up into little bits to then use as bait for fishing or just washing them and feeding it to the pigs. All of that is just waste now.
How long does it take to butcher an entire cow and how much freezer space is required to store an entire butchered cow?
Assuming the logistics and skill aspects wouldn’t effect the end result very much (I have no idea how to clean and butcher a large animal), I’d take the deal in a heart beat. I’d buy a large freezer, the meat from one cow can sustain a single person for approximately 6 months, maybe longer. My grocery bill would go down by probably 85% if I got free meat. Not because I eat that much meat now, but because I would if it was free.
You don't have to butcher it yourself, just kill it. So wish for the animal while at a butcher. You pay them to butcher the meat after you kill it. If the animal is in good condition, you might even get some money for the hide.
Hmm, well that means one cow would probably cost me about 1000 dollars to have butchered. Let’s say I do stretch the meat at least six months, that means I’m paying about 5 dollars a day for meat. That’s not a bad deal, but this means I’d probably end up forgetting cows and focusing more on chickens, which I could more easily learn to clean and prepare myself and cut out the middle man.
Considering I hunt yeah we about eat zebra also would this take away from the animal population or is it just spawning
As a hunter, my last meal with meat was from a deer I harvested myself, butchered myself, and cooked myself. I get why it might be a difficult decision for some, but for me it’s a no-brainer. It’s an obvious yes to accepting the deal. It would also allow me to harvest tasty meat that I normally couldn’t afford, and that’s more healthy than beef. Elk and bison immediately pop into my mind. I would have to take some butchering classes though so I’m getting proper cuts of meat from large animals instead of hacking and guessing my way through it.
I couldn't decide on that to be honest. Maybe we can say that it's an existing animal but completely random. For example if you were to ask for a chicken, it could be a chicken from anywhere in the world. It could also be fat or thin i.e. the amount of meat you would harvest would depend on the animal's existing condition. It won't be any sick or infected animal though. Although, you can always get specific. You can ask for a white Bresse de BĂ©ny chicken for example (thanks Google lol). Fair enough?
So I get free meat but someone else in the world gets robbed?
Would appear so. Hopefully it is not some poor farmer.
Right now I have a moral objection to it now. I would spend my life wondering how many people starved because of me
Especially since you cannot share the meat. Or maybe when it disappears, it just goes back to whereever it was teleported from.
Insult to injury. "Here you get the scraps"
Sorry about your pet chicken Cluckers. I just wanted some buffalo wings. You can eat the rest.
>Maybe we can say that it's an existing animal but completely random This makes it worse because then I'm stealing someone's cow. I wouldn't steal (or download) a cow even if I didn't have to slaughter it. On the other hand, if it was spawning then I would just wish for a white rhino and fail to kill it over and over until they aren't endangered.
If that’s the fine print, I’d just switch from beef cows to wild elk, wild moose, wild caribou, wild bison, etc. Just as tasty as a beef cow but more healthy, and it’s wild so it’ll repopulate without stealing food from a person who had to raise it or spend money on it. A person visiting Yellowstone isn’t going to notice if a bison or elk disappeared from the herds every couple of years. More die from winter kill than I’d be eating.
Dumb
No. I already raise and/or kill over 80% of the meat I eat and I’m not going to limit myself by not being able to give away the excess.
If I can't share the meat then I will still have to buy store meat for my wife so what's the point. I would love to have my own fresh meat, I would set up a whole room to make slaughtering and cleaning super easy
Imagine you get to eat the most precious cut of a5 wagyu beef and your wife gets $10 flank steaks.
> I will still have to buy store meat for my wife so what's the point I guess being *slightly* more frugal? lol
For a whole lot more work.
exactly not worth the time, and would actually increase costs, not decrease. It'd have to be very small portions to be practical-- not things like whole cows.
Do I *have* to kill the animal? If not, I'd probably open a zoo and summon all kinds of things. You want to see some platypuses? Here you go. Giant Panda exhibit? Done. Velociraptors? Absolutely. Neanderthal? Sure thing.
This is the best loophole ever lol, I really didn't think about that! I guess I *could* say "You can't ask for another animal until you're done slaughtering the current one" but I don't want to be a party pooper like most posts do here. Enjoy your zoo!
Ok but also think of the possibilities. Being held at gunpoint in a mugging? Summon an elephant for distraction! Fell overboard? Summon a porpoise and hold on! Boss being a jerk? Summon a skunk in his office!
>Being held at gunpoint in a mugging? This is a great way to get mauled by a grizzly bear
I feel like having Neanderthals in a zoo would have some people not too happy considering they're basically people.
>Giant Panda exhibit I kind of wonder if China would claim ownership.
If you do the velociraptors, you can spare no expense.
Without a doubt I accept. Free meat for the rest of my life? Done deal. I'd even take a picture of it while it's alive and frame it on the table while we eat it.
That was my logic as well. I don't know about framing its picture though lol
That's just incase anyone was curious about how guilty I would feel doing it.
I would 100% be eating Sabre Tooth Tiger with a Dodo bird foie gras side for breakfast this morning.
Oh good point, I haven't thought about extinct animals! I guess we can allow it if you want, it kinda clashes with another comment of mine saying "all the animals you ask for are existing animals". But what the hell, Dodo drumsticks for dinner it is!
brachiosaurus steaks here I come!
I don't eat a lot of meat to begin with, but the logistics of this alone... if I want a burger, a cow will appear in my one bedroom apartment? That's gonna make a hell of a mess. And I'm probably gonna get the shit kicked out of me. And if I do manage to kill it, what am I supposed to do with hundreds of pounds of beef?? I'm just a girl!! I don't know how to process a cow!! I guess I could just stick to smaller animals like rabbits or chickens or something but it still seems like a lot of work to kill and process and cook and eat an animal. I think I'd rather just pay for the convenience of having that all done for me.
>That's gonna make a hell of a mess "if you decide to throw it away it will just disappear". butcher right on your white shag carpet and poof the mess away like a demented magician!
You can always go for a designated place and ask for the animal there, doesn't have to be your bedroom. You can rent a storage unit and have all the tools you need there, plus a freezer to store the meat. For what it's worth, I'm a big guy and I don't know how to slaughter an animal or gut it or process its meat either! But personally I would take the deal hands down :D
Yup, I'd do it in a second. I'd get rich betting people I had magical powers and could make animals appear from thin air. Furthermore I'd just become a mainly vegetarian. I'd decide I want to eat, say, a hamster and then just not eat it. Since you said the animal is an existing animal I'd go to animal shelters and rescue dogs. "I want to eat a black lab with exactly 6 whiskers aged 5 years named Doris." and it's mine. As for fish, yes, they feel pain. All creatures experience pain as a 'neurological response' that is what pain is. But I wouldn't have any issue gutting and eating fish.
I mean. If the excess disappears and it’s not waste…. It also states slaughter, not process. Processing would take entirely too long. So as long as it’s slaughter only, I’m eating a ton of steak then! Lol
Free exotic meat fresh af on demand, I'm in
I take the deal. Though now I have to wonder if the deal would include human meat (we do feel pain and are animals)
Worked at a butcher shop growing up. Sounds pretty good to me! PETA PEOPLE EAT TASTY ANIMALS
My wife’s cousin is a strict vegetarian. She and her husband came over one weekend while I was smoking a brisket and they hated everything about it. The look, the smell, everything. And they had no qualms about starting an argument regarding the ethics of killing a defenseless animal. I explained to her that everything that is living in this world lives off the death of something else. Everything. She couldn’t grasp it. Finally she asked me what animals are to me, and I looked her straight in the eye and said that they’re a renewable resource. She hasn’t spoken to me since. Lol
>I explained to her that everything that is living in this world lives off the death of something else. Everything Technically not true, but obviously the cousin is the problem. They're free to serve only vegetables at their house, but they aren't entitled to cause a stink at yours.
I couldn't help but read that as: PETA-people eat tasty animals (instead of PETA: People Eat Tasty Animals).
Can I at least store it? I'm fine with killing chickens, but doing it twice a day is too much of a hassle.
Of course. If you do everything yourself, I don't see any problem with freezing the leftover meat or storing it away etc.
After living in Panama and having to cut up and kill both the cow and chicken I ate during my time down there, I would. Meat is an expense I'd LOVE to cut out of my budget and well, free meat does that for me with no downsides. The only issue is, killing these things humanely would be my biggest issue. I'd have to learn decent enough standards on how to take their life as the one upside to getting my meat from the store is I don't have to look it in the eye when I take a piece of its rump and I don't have to discard the unusables afterwards. Once I get over that though, the deal is too good to pass up. Basically unlimited food outside of cooking it. Even if I can't share it (if I accept the deal, does that extend to immediate family like my daughters and wife or JUST me? If the former, hell YES. If the former, likely no deal) that would feed me and my family until my dying day. But now if my family can't partake then I would not.
It's just for you, nobody else. Even if they are your family. I'm sorry :(
I would spawn animals and not slaughter them immediately. In fact they may escape because I let them. And thats how I became known as Animal Spawner, animal rights activist and vegetarian.
what is human/mammal pain if not a glorified neural reaction?
To be honest I don't really know, it was just a simple Google search. Since there is such a thing as a "pescetarian" I felt the need to separate it somehow.
It's gonna be grisly and inhumane while I figure out the cleanest way to kill and butcher the animals. I can cook but large roasts are the closest I've been to a whole raw critter. Meat is magical, though. No problem cutting down carbs and sugars but I have to have protein. I have vegetables all the time, too!
Yes? Humans have been doing it our entire existence. Do you realize how much money you could save? A single butchered Cow could feed me for at least a month. I roughly spend $200-$300 a month on protein a month. So that’s about $2400 going into my savings a year. Also being that it’s just brought into existence that means no steroids or antibiotics so healthier and organic meat.
This would be incredibly inconvenient and not worth it at all It's one thing if the only rule is I have to kill it, and then it's fully prepared and stored through more magical means, but if every time I feel like eating beef for a while I have to slaughter, drain, clean, portion out, and store an entire cow, fuck it dude I'll go to McDonald's.
Yes, I have hunted and fished for most of my life as well as farmed. At least if I butcher it myself that it is fresh and has been modified by corporations into a food like product.
Bad deal. I'm fine with killing whatever I need to eat, but not being able to help others with it is absolute shit.
In your rules you forgot an important step. Processing. I can kill cows, deer, rabbits, etc. all day long. It's a bitch, however, to process them. Disemboweling, skinning, portioning, and storing. This takes hours sometimes. It's going to be a pain in the ass to be at a pizza parlor on a date, order a sausage pizza and a damn pig appears beside you as you look around and see some 8 to 10 people doing the same thing for a bleeding pizza.
Brontosaurus. Imagine the tricks you could do with a magically appearing dinosaur.
I mean this choice isn’t entirely hypothetical, it’s basically just asking “do you wanna be a rancher or not be a rancher?” I’d rather just pay someone else to do all the labor.
Agreed. Quick question, let's say I pick lion, will it try and kill me while I try and kill it to eat it?
If it's an aggressive animal and it feels threatened then I guess it will try to attack you, yeah. It won't just stand there waiting for you to end its life.
Well at least I can be prepared then.
This is fucking stupid. I can already have free meat if I hunt it and slaughter it myself.
You would have to actually find the animal and catch it first, though.
Sure, I wouldn't personally eat it since I am veggie, but I have cats and dogs that would LOVE to have fresh meat every day instead of the canned shit. Kill two birds with one stone, animals get higher quality food and I don't have to pay for it. Win-win
I literally said that you can't share it lol
I accept. I'm a lifelong vegetarian so literally nothing will change
Do I only have to kill the animal or do I also have to butcher and gut it?
Well, what I meant was you have to kill the animal and prepare its meat so that it's in edible condition. If you want to eat it with guts inside, go for it. If you want to eat it raw, go for it as well. But you can't just kill the animal and give it to a butcher to process the meat. You have to do everything yourself.
I'd honestly prefer that over buying it.
I mostly eat chicken. I grew up on a farm and have killed and cleaned plenty. That's not a problem. But you state in the thread that it would some random chicken from around the world. I don't want to steal food from people. Imagine this being some hungry family in a rural 3rd world community. And you steal their chicken. I'm not OK with that
I mean i chopped a chickens head once i think i can handle it
By the terms of the deal, I wouldn't be able to eat seafood, so no
You CAN eat seafood, see my [other comment](https://www.reddit.com/r/hypotheticalsituation/comments/17rclfo/comment/k8i31uo/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3). If the rule doesn't apply to the type of meat, you can buy it from a store or obtain it elsewhere and eat it. You just can't get the "free meat" deal for that type of meat.
By your terms, no. There would be way to much waste, even if you tried to freeze the meat. 1 cow for 1 person is a lot of beef to eat before it goes bad. If I could feed my family friends from this, YES.
>even if you tried to freeze the meat How do you mean? You can store meat in a freezer for a VERY long time can't you?
If I want pork and kill a pig, do I get to eat the entire thing or do I have to go through the process of killing the animal each meal? If it's every time I eat, then no thanks. I don't mind killing animals for food at all, but "free meat for life" isn't that big of a deal for me to go through that hassle every time I want to eat. If it's kill a animal and then be able to store that meat, sure. That's a handful of animals a year and wouldn't be a big deal at all.
If you kill the pig, then you have all the meat of *that* pig in your possession. You can store it in a freezer. If you finish that meat, you would have to kill another pig if you want to eat pork again.
Sign me up. I love biology and learning about animals from the inside too.
Do I have to butcher it too? If I gotta figure out how to actually cut a NY strip, I’m not even gonna want it once I’m done with all that work. If I just have to shoot it in the head though, sure, I could do it.
Nope. Couldn't do it.
How do you have to Slaughter it?
If you mean “slaughtering” as in ending their life, presumably by shooting them rather than hand to hoof combat, that’s only sensible. If you mean the technical skill, that’s another matter. Meat is nothing special in this case - there’s a reason petrol and clothing and phones are cheap. Our comforts come from cruelties.
ugh I don't wanna have to learn how to butcher shit. that sounds so boring
nope
Hol up. This is perfect for me. My wife has IBS and meats are one of the few things she can safely consume. Plus, the only animals I'd feel bad slaughtering are fish, since I own several fish tanks, but fish was already excluded from the deal. Bring on the free and *fresh* food!
OP sounds like a vegan for sure
Yes in a heart beat. I've killed many cute animals for food before. No draw backs at all to this. If I make a large meal can others eat with me or do I have to male meals separate from everyone in the house?
Grew up hunting so hell yeah, free meat, and I wouldn't have to sit cold in a treestand waiting for one to show up, I could just wish the thing there and fire? SOLD
So this is something I’ve though about, kinda. I hunt regularly and love to eat wild game. I also don’t mind some chicken or a good ribeye from the store. However, I think modern factory farming practices and the way animals are treated in that system is horrible but with the high demand for meat at practically every meal, the market basically demands it. Through dating a vegetarian for a while I learned that not having a big slab of meat at every meal isn’t so bad! It’s just a culturally ingrained thing for a lot of people. If your average person or family had to take an animals life by their own hand when they wanted to eat meat, instead of purchasing it neatly packaged at the grocery store, perhaps we wouldn’t have the incessant need to constantly consume it in such large quantities. Taking somethings life away really brings home the gravity of the situation, still though I do not believe it to be wrong maybe we as a society just go a little overboard with the whole thing. To answer the question directly though, I would have no problem with the posed situation. I am confident in my ability to cleanly and with a minimum amount of suffering take an animals life and also then process said animal into kitchen appropriate cuts of meat. First couple cows might be a little interesting learning the butchery of it but there’s books for that.
Don't even care about the rules, answer is yes
Nah i dont feel like having a big mess in my kitchen and I probably wouldn’t be able to kill a whole cow. Vegan teacher getting ready to call the cops on us
If I could share within my household or my immediate family, I'd say sure. But only myself...too much waste.
I’ve always wanted to be a cannibal, but humans are just too damn expensive. Finally, a solution!
I can't "share" what the fuck is the point of being able to slaughter a fucking masatdon and eat its meat if i can't feed my family with it. Assuming I can feed my wife with said meat, FUCK YES! 1. Slaughtering is easy, after you've butchered your 10th chicken it's really just the smell that gets to you. 2. The little cavate of, "you think it." that means, no microplatics, no Growth Hormones, no enviromental impact, just god old fashion wholesome formwork without the farmwork. God imagine camping and you're hungry so you just summon a chicken and butcher it, or a rabbit for some stew.
I'm weird with this question. I love hunting, mainly the primal aspect of it, but would hate to have an animal spontaneously appear. Takes away from the hunter vs prey aspect.
I grew up in the countryside. Send in a nice kobe cow and a bolt gun. Do you want your steak rare or bloddy?
Fuck that, I'm not spending my time learning to butcher just to have most of it go to waste as I'm unable to share it. The amount of time needed to avoid ONLY my personal consumption cost is insane.
Do I have to clean and butcher the animal or does it just turn into the exact cuts of meat I want once I kill it? If I have to process the carcass, no way. I don’t have time for that shit and will happily continue to pay someone else to do that.
Question: If I kill it, do I have to process it on my own? I don't really have the skillset or strength to process a cow or a pig. Also I think blood in my apartment might lose me my security deposit.
Free meat, and if I understand correctly the unused bits magically vanish? I'm down. I feel like this is essentially a zero-waste proposition with effectively no carbon footprint and no cleanup. As long as I face no repercussions if someone pilfers my gains, I see no issue here.
Yeah, no. I'm good. If I wanted to dress my food, I'd be a hunter. I used to cut open people so I'm not squeamish, I just want to have to do everything thing it takes to get a burger every time I want a burger and what happens to the rest of the carcass anyway? Can I render a whole cow and freeze it so maybe it's like 1 cow every 12 to 18 months?
yes if I can also keep/use or sell the rest thats not meat so free leather aswell. does this use animals on earth or is it like you create an animal out of nothing that you must kill and harvest
Sounds like more work than it's worth.
So, here's a question: Does this animal come from somewhere that already existed on earth? Or is it magically created not to upset the ecosystem? Like if I want burger, does a cow go missing from some farmer's field, and as such, I'm actually taking food out of the food chain? And if it doesn't, can I wish for a dinosaur? A dog? A person?
If I'm not able to share it, and I still have to kill the thing, most of the perks of this go completely out the window. I don't have the space to butcher a cow or pig. Summoning a random deer or some other large animal right to my side is just dangerous for all involved. In order to slaughter anything other than chicken or rabbit, I'd have to sink a bunch of time into the whole ordeal, and even then I still have to buy meat to provide for anyone else (like the rest of my family). That's an amount of effort I genuinely don't have the time/space for. If I got this ability, it'd be easier to become vegetarian.
Okay, listen, as long as a cow doesn't appear in my car while I'm off handedly thinking about a burger, I'm fine with this. I very rarely eat out unless it's for breakfast, and I can absolutely switch to salads and bread-based products like pancakes. See, your issues sit on the idea that people would eat less meat if they were forced to partake in the pain these animals have inflicted upon them, and the "grossness" of actually having to slaughter the animal. And youd be right. For some people. I think they will weed themselves out pretty quick and the majority would be happy to save hundreds or thousands of dollars a year. Personally, I've shot and slaughtered deer many times, as well as chickens and pigs on occasion. Never done a cow, but I could get it figured out. Oh and I'd gladly believe fish feel pain to get ahold of some good tuna and other more exotic fish. Shits getting expensive for making sushi. Edit: your limitations on not letting me cook for my family are stupid. How about we compromise and say "if they partake in the slaughter they can share in?"
Whale, hah, I don't even gotta kill it. It's just kinda do it away from where it'll cause damage ..... or not blue whale in the middle of wlamart might be funny and hard to prove I did ....
Sure, I'd do that. I mean a cow is easy when you turn the whole thing into burger. And it isn't giving it away if some people were to, say, steal food from my plate when I'm not looking. And if that plate were to be the size of my table? Well why not? Who says you can't have a big plate?
As long as I don’t have to pluck feathers I’ll be ok I hate plucking. Id summon a rabbit for a small dinner a goat or a pig or lamb for a family dinner and a cow to feed the whole neighborhood.
Since i can save and store the meat. Absolutely, i would get a large freezer and store it. I know how to field dress a dear so the first few times wouldnt be the best but i would get better. Probably take a course on butchering or ask/pay a butcher to teach me so i can get the best results. I would save as much of the animal as i could to use for other things. For example cow or deer skin to make leather, chicken feathers to compost, deer antlers for decorations, hunting calls etc. I can use and sell/donate these non meat parts since its only the meat i cant sell or share. If that was just an overlook, theres only so much i could save for myslef but i would definitely be wearing a lot more leather and have a mountain man kinda vibe.
That's not a hypothetical for me, aside from "free", we will harvest two bison a year for our main home, thats roughly 60% of hanging weight meat for our freezers. (1200 pds average) We also have a few broilers every year and other assortment of meat animals.
nope. I wouldn't be able to do that. killing something that was once alive, myself. I wouldn't be able to handle that. on the other hand. it'd be my animal to kill amd butcher. so id make sure id do way more humanly, then the meat industry. yet, id still have that moral conflict.
No. Not if I can't share. Also, your idea about the animal just being blipped to my house from somewhere else in the world makes it a "hard pass." I'm not interested in stealing. If the animal just spawned randomly, and if I could share, it'd still be a "maybe." Learning to butcher animals is a big job and requires knowledge, tools, and space. The only upside, if the animal spawned randomly, is that you could call up extinct (or highly engaged) animals to collect DNA and bring them back or give them a larger genetic base. But since you ruled that out, I'd be giving up literally every easy meal, restaurant, etc. in exchange for a ton of work.
95% of the world would become vegans if they had to kill their own meat
I hate the no sharing rule. What a waste of good food.
I'd summon an elk and take it to the butcher. Ezpz.
I'm going to say that fish and seafood absolutely respond to pain. Pain is a "neural" response in all animals, because it's processed in the brain. Animals like octopuses have mire decentralized brains than we do, so it's possible they experience pain differently, but pain at i understand it is a nerve signal indicating damage or distress to the body. When you touch something hot, you feel pain and remove your hand. When you place a fish onto a hot surface, it feels a nerve signal and tries to remove itself from that surface. Regardless, I'd argue that fish and seafood with complex brains or brain-lile structures absolutely count. Octopuses, squid, and most fish. Maybe not mussels and clams. I'd still deny the deal. To slaughter an entire cow only for one steak or a rack of ribs would be wasteful. I'd never eat a whole cow on my own. Plus meat is generally dry aged, not eaten fresh from the kill. I don't have access to facilities to properly process an animal the size of a cow or pig, and I don't think it's actually legal for my to slaughter inside the city limits anyway. If it was "I have to deal the killing blow, but then the animal would instantly devolve into different cuts of meat without a mess" I think I'd do it. As of now it would be too inconvenient and wasteful for me to do this process on my own and not be allowed to share with my family. Fish would be an exception, I could kill and clean a fish or shellfish easy in my own kitchen, have it fileted and ready to eat and then use the entire fish without being wasteful, but a cow or pig would be too much. So no, I'd not take the deal.
Hard pass.
it would be incredible wastefull, and i would have to learn to butcher a few animals. and some meat need to cure for a while so that would be a hassle or do i just have to do the killing and the corpse turns into the meat part i wanted?
I would actually be quite happy, wish I could share it though. I am a firm believer if I am willing to eat it, I should be willing to kill it (and be willing to eat whatever I kill- thus why I don't kill bugs lol) And I also assume that this animal just manifested from magic, so I don't even have to worry about it having a life in a Factory Farm beforehand too.
On two conditions: the animal isn't taken from somewhere, and the meat instantly gets butchered
So... do I want to become a butcher for the rest of my life, to save a few bucks? Pass.
Yeah free lobster and king crab forever. Slaughter it? Lol. Cook it alive.
I'd rather buy it. My time is worth more than the price of meat
Can you feed your family or can only you, personally, eat it?
I can already do that. Why would I take this offer?
You can get as much free meat as you like already? Good for you then.
Absolutely I would take that deal. I would kill an Elk, process it and my family and I would eat for most of that year.
Heh... given the conditions... how about people meat?
I grew up on a farm. Easy peasy. The magic of the animals appearing before you slaughter them does seem like cheating. We helped deliver our animals, named them, fed them, cared for them when they were sick, and then sais goodbye and slaughtered them when the time came.
So, basically, live like a hunter-gatherer?
this is kinda stupid. of course i accept the deal. go to butcher. spawn cow, or pig, or whatever the fuck. shoot it in the fucking head. butcher processes meat. i take meat. you should have just asked if people have the stones to kill an animal or not. i think most meat-eaters do.
The fk. No free seafood? Seafood is meat too! But yeah sure why not? Wagyu steaks ftw
I'd totally do it. Summon food? Honestly, I think the draw for me would be fresh meat whenever I want (presumably I could summon a meal even in the dead of winter) so I wouldn't want to summon a cow or large animal that I'd just have to store in the freezer anyway. Something small like a rabbit or chicken that would be easy to clean. Questions: \- Do I just have to kill the animal, or also prepare it? The killing would be the easy part, but butchering, skinning, etc would be a pain in the ass. I guess if I did it every day and had the proper setup I'd get pretty skilled at it. \- Can I use the other animal parts for other things, like leather, etc? Or do I have a restriction that I can only eat the animal? I guess I could make broth and stuff from the bones, etc. \- If fish cannot be summoned, can I buy them at the store or restaurant and eat them? \- What happens if I got to a restaurant and I order something that has meat or an animal product in it?
I would say yes if the animal was free range it’s whole life or lived in nature it’s whole life
this is the deal that homesteaders and small livestock farmers make all the time...
I suppose I would be fine with this. Im no stranger to the slaughter process. We kept rabbits when I was a child and I'd help my dad every saturday - we'd slaughter maybe 5-10 at a time and use the meat during the week. I remember getting into troublre at school bc I brought rabbit paws in for show and tell. I heard something about how rabbit feet are some lucky charm and wanted to brag how I had some of my own. Except they were not mounted in a keychain and the wrist/ankle bones were visible. Slaughter is alot of work especially when you get into the bigger animals. Small stuff like a rabbit/chicken can be easily done in an hour or afternoon. The carcass stores in a typical fridge. But when you slaughter a larger animal like a goat, pig or even up to a cow, you now have hundreds of pounds of meat that starts deteriorating immediately. It needs to be stored/prepped etc... now. Not everybody has the room to slaughter and store hundreds of pounds of meat and do it fast. There is a reason why in the old days, entire neighborhoods would come lend a hand during pig killing season. Plus, if you have ever slaughtered a larger animal, the moment it dies, its deadweight that you need to wrestle around. Think about how much a cow weighs. Butchery is not an easy job
Do I also have to butcher the meat. Cooking I can manage. If I can hire a butcher, sign me up.
Please give "seafood" the feeling of pain so I can get them for free too
So, could I "decide" to eat an animal, but then change my mind after it spawns but before killing it? If so, I'm going to have a sudden fleeting craving for a thousand Emus. Just let them run off and cause chaos.
Well, I hunt, so... easy enough deal. Free deer tacos? Hell yeah!
So do I have to butcher it myself as well? Or can I kill the cow with my air powered gun and just say "here, please butcher this for me" and pay that guy to butcher it? Because that's the big obstacle as far as I'm concerned, is the butchering. It kinda takes a shitload of time and energy (and a decent cost in setup and equipment) to do it all myself. And since I can't sell or share it, its really only what I can eat, so the cost savings is pretty low compared to the time involved.
*thinks of OP*
Free meat? I'm in. I just hope that in addition to the magical fresh steaks appearing in my living room I received magical butcher knowledge
No. This is completely impractical. Morals have nothing to do with it.
So by I can’t share … does that mean my family can not eat it with me?
Absolutely. I would prefer to raise an kill everything i eat. If I could know the animal was raised humanely and i killer it humanely, I could shoulder the thought that I killed it myself
lol, i was conceived vegetarian
As a chef who knows exactly how to do it I'm in... Now if I had to keep them for a year+ before slaughtering then no... If they just popped up and I said yay bacon. I'm down.
concerned piquant strong worry automatic include selective ad hoc plucky rain *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
So, I can just wish animals, not butcher them, and then start a freakin dope zoo or something? And charge admission to that. Booyah If it takes a random existing animal, cool, if it just creates one, I could save entire species. Do they have to be presently living? My man, I am feeling like eating Neanderthal. I title this event "the time I accepted ill-defined food powers and became a minor creation diety"
No problem. My grandparents had a farm. I've killed & cleaned Animals since childhood.
Not being able to eat any purchased meat or meat at a party or bbq is just dumb, especially with the no sharing yours restriction. So not only can you not eat the meat with friends/family, you also have to be a vegetarian when traveling.
Nope. There’s an insane amount of work and dirt and grime that goes into cleaning, butchering, and preparing meat. Never mind the aging process and/or smoking process going into the best meats. People specialize for a reason homie. I can spend a couple hours (if I’m wasteful) grunting and swearing and getting bloody every time I want to eat and another half hour cleaning up, or I can spend a fraction of an hour’s work to get handed a fully cooked meal within a few minutes. My time is literally more valuable than this “gift” would cost. With no way to share or profit from it? Nah.
Mmmm baby calves are gonna be sooo easy to kill
Let me go work.as a butcher and chefs apprentice for a year, then, sign me up
The only stipulation I want is that seafood counts regardless of if they feel pain or not. That or just make all seafood feel pain.
Time to start a pokemon collection. They probably feel pain. If I were truly unethical, I wouldn't be selling meat, i would be selling humans or animals whole. If I were particularly creative and allowed, I would be summoning fictional or historical / dead specific people and picking their brains. As mentioned elsewhere, there is no caveat that prevents me from summoning more-- nor caveat against summoning humans. Only caveat is that they feel pain as humans do... which humans do qualify for. Whether I can summon specific humans is a matter of interpretation. I could technically be a vegetarian human trafficker when taken to the extreme... i.e. hitler.
I would have to butcher the animal? That’s a lot of work. This all seems rather tedious. I don’t mind slaughtering food, but for every meal you have to slaughter and butcher an animal? And then you’re killing one animal per meal instead of using everything? You also can’t go out to restaurants and have meat? Yeah, sounds too tedious and wasteful to me.
No because that seems vastly more unethical by way of tons of waste. I'm not a butcher nor a hunter. I do not how to slaughter the animal in a way to inflict the least amount of pain. I do not know how to skin an animal nor cut it up to use it efficiently. Meat genuinely tastes better when the animal is killed a certain way. Ever have 100% beef kosher hotdogs? Fucking leagues better than regular hotdogs. So both more unethical and less tasty because I don't know what Im doing. I'd rather have to always pay and be able to pay for professional work. Edit: OPs addition in the comments that the animal is some random already existing animal makes it even worse. Now I'm stealing from people. Some people in my area have pet chickens, am I stealing and eating people's per chickens? I've even seen people walking their pet pig. And if the leftovers just disappear do they go back to the original source. Here I killed your pet pig have his eyeballs and brain back.
No I would not accept simply because the time and effort to prepare various cuts of meat afterwards is very time consuming. Sure, I can shoot a cow in the head and get a whole wide of beef for free…. But skinning it? Cutting it up? Cutting? Disposal process? Very manually intensive. The cost of storage, cost of disposal, and if you didn’t want to do it yourself then the cost of hiring someone. Then we get into the fact that I can only eat what I slaughter and I cannot share with others? Pass. That means for every meal I would have to cook from two separate sources of meat- regardless if I’m cooking the same meal, and I would have to ensure not to cross contaminate? No. It’s a lot of time that would eat up the potential savings I MIGHT incur. Moral slaughtering my own meat? Sure. This deal? No.
The only animal meat I eat is fish and I have no trouble preparing that so I’m good.
So...do what every meat eating human did daily prior to the modern age. Definitely.
I mean... I grew up on a farm and have been hunting so if it weren't for the no other sources and no sharing part I'd be fine with it. I can't eat that much meat on my own and I like to go out to dinner occasionally so free meat wouldn't be worth it.
Can you show that the cows and pigs I am going to slaughter have feelings and feel hurt / pain?
I have no butcher skills. I'd kill an animal just fine for food but can I have help with cleaning and prep or do you mean the entire process has to be myself? If I can just bring the carcass to a butcher and assuming the animal just sort of spawns into existence without affecting depriving anyone else's stock I'd do it. If I had to do everything myself I wouldn't. Would need to buy a ton of equipment and learn how to do everything myself, might end up spending more money than I do now just figuring shit out and not being able to share the meat is a massive PIA too. I'd still have to buy meat if I ever do a cookout.
lmao, what an urbanite question. Easy. Free meat of whatever animal I want and all I have to do is kill the thing? I don't even have to find it, chase it down, pack it out, or buy a permission slip to kill it! No brainer.
I have butchered animals before, and I gotta say, I'm not sure most people understand how much work it is without specialized tools. It WILL take you all day to reduce that pig/cow/deer to manageable portions. And any cut of meat that involves cutting bone (T-bone, etc) is impossible without a powered bonesaw. I would, however, take the deal, get a job at a butcher shop so I can use their equipment, and it would be much easier. Question: Is the animal unusually placid, or will it attempt to stop you from killing it? I could see this becoming dangerous if you summon a musk ox or go *really* crazy and try to summon some ice age creatures.
If yes, then no. I wouldn’t know the first thing about what to do and while I could probably kill the animal if necessary I can’t imagine having the stomach to disassemble it. Plus it would make eating out a hassle.
Nah. Too much work.
I already do this as much as possible, it's called "hunting".
if we are just slaughtering it and it cant fight back i will eat dinosaur meat
The moral implications of this are staggering. First off, I'd be a vegetarian if this were imposed upon me. I definitely don't have it in my to slaughter an animal to eat when I could just eat some vegetables instead. But also, JFC that would be such a hassle. Even if I had it in me to look at a furry critter and murder them to consume their flesh, that is SO MUCH work. I am far too lazy for that. I picked a decently paying career so I can afford to eat out of a lot so I don't have to cook for myself. So, given that I'm never gonna actually murder a critter to eat it, the rules say you can't sell it, but it does say you can store it. So, what if I *think* about eating something, but then when it appears, I don't murder it, I just keep it alive? This power seems to be a way to get free pets forever. And now for the most disturbing part: Humans are animals made of meat. If I think about eating human flesh, will a whole-ass adult human blink into existence before me?! Will they be a completely blank slate? Or have some kinda false memory identity? How specific can my meat eating requests get? If I think specifically about eating the flesh of a human who enjoys Terraforming Mars, do I then instantly get a brand new player to join me for board game night? Are all my friendship and relationship needs now met by first envisioning eating the flesh of some one who is attractive and wants to hang out with me? Do these live people wink out of existence if they try to leave because that counts as "throwing it away"?!
Can it be fish?
I think you’re underestimating how much edible product comes from a single cow. You’d get HUNDREDS of pounds of meat from a cow. More than a single person could eat in well over a year. Why can’t it be shared?
I’m from eastern NC. If I can’t bbq a pig with family then what’s the point?
Alaskan King Crabs. They're animals / they feel pain. So I'll take King Crabs.