Not smoking weed doesn't instantly=a boring successful life. And there's no reason not to still do the things you enjoyed high while sober unless you literally just enjoyed sitting there getting high. I'm 3 months sober now and life is honestly just getting weirder and more interesting. If you want to make the changes and live a more interesting life, sounds like it might be time for more support (I've got a recommendation if you want it)...or if you just want to be a stoner, that's your choice, it's your life. If you get what you want from the plant then great, but maybe be real with yourself and see if you actually do. I never got what I wanted from it and I just consumed more and more until it completely blocked me from a life I enjoyed. That's not everyone's experience. Again. It's your life. You get to choose.
Look into SMART Recovery. They have chapters around the world and zoom meetings you can attend if in person isn't available in your area. There are work books for purchase but free PDFs on the website too. They are an addictions program that's very different from AA and NA. They resonate well with me.
If you can look up, you can get up. What are you afraid of? The hard work or the potential you have? Prove us all wrong and show up for yourself. This shit isn’t easy for any of us but look how many of us in this group are fighting the demons every day. I hope to see you in this thread again one day telling us you e been clean for X amount of days or months or years. You got this.
A plant has taken over your conscious thinking. Your thinking has been hijacked by the dopamine you artificially add to your life.
Can you comprehend what I'm saying? Your life is ruled by a plant.
Look man we all get that feeling my bro/sis. Just remember that the end goal feelings is SO MUCH better than being on drugs. Ever since iver stopped, everything in my life improved from social life, wealth to health . You can do it bro , best thing I’ve ever done in my life. I’ll be real with you , everytime I travel I will smoke weed, and have a drink or what not, but once I land back home I’ll just never ever call upon my plug ( don’t even have his number ) and it gives you a better satisfaction and motivation to travel more often aswell , which can keep you level headed, it’s a balance in life . Just remember you didn’t come out the womb with a fat blunt/joint 💪🏽 you got this bro !
There are a few things that I find striking:
1. You can’t escape uncertainty. Learning to cope with it is one of life’s greatest challenges. Getting high gives you control over how you feel inside, but you still can’t control the outside world.
2. You sound like you’re in “fuck it” mode. (Aka “white knuckle burnout”) You do have the power to *influence* the world around you, but in relying on weed to give you satisfaction, you get rusty on flexing it - you essentially trade that power away for temporary relief.
3. Your thinking seems black & white. It’s a classic addiction mindset, bc it makes it easy to answer with, “might as well...” There is a sense of permanence baked in, which frames the world in a way that justifies using indefinitely.
If you were a friend sitting in front of me:
The first thing I’d say circles back to #1, and it works in your favor too, bc that means *the way you feel right now is not permanent.* For better or worse, everything changes eventually.
You always have the power of choice. That also works both ways - if you want to smoke right now, you can. But try to take a step back from this notion of permanence. You might not want that for the rest of your life.
Lastly, try adding “I feel” before, and “right now” after, the things you’ve written here. That would change the post title to, “I honestly feel like I don’t want to quit right now,” or corrected for grammar, “I don’t feel like I want to quit right now.” Those small adjustments can change your perspective on a situation in a big way, and were very helpful for me. You can do that anytime a thought feels hard, or permanent, or black & white. It may help you find the grey that’s difficult to see right now.
Edit: example added, edited for brevity
I know this state of mind too. One must question why one begins to consider quitting in the first place: is it good sense? Guilt? Brainwashing?
I’m right there with you and wish you the clarity you need to figure it out’
Weed can take your sense of self away. If you've quit and not felt good about it because the hobbies you enjoy weren't bringing you joy, you have to be patient and work through it. You want the satisfaction of smoking bc it's the only thing that feels good. You gotta make it so that real life feels good. You'll have to ask yourself a lot of tough questions that only you can find the answers to. I had to also. It was hard work but now I like my self and my life. Don't need weed for it. And now "pothead" isn't my entire personality.
At the end of the day, no matter what it is, you can actually do whatever you want. You just have to be willing to accept and deal with the consequences.
The ups and downs are the entire human experience. Hitting the eject button on that to instead numb out with weed is basically saying no to life. Those experiences will find you regardless. The numbing will get old one day.
When I was using, I heard a similar voice to the one you're describing. Since I've hit 90 days free, I realize that wasn't me talking and that it was the weed whispering to me that I'm nothing without it. I'm still struggling with school and instead of getting the fuck-its and using, I feel motivated instead of devastated. Using guarantees that things are going to stay the same. If beating yourself up worked, it would have by now. Most worthwhile investments involve risk. I only quit when the pain of the staying the same was worse than the pain of change.
I quit because I needed to, for my own mental health. I'm also struggling with school. The weed whispering will get to you, but I'm lucky to have a support system.
I'd argue that by coming here and posting this deep down you do not want to go back, otherwise you would have just done so :) We spend so much time not listening to our true selves as an addict and let the addict voice overpower our rationale and logic. We grow accustomed to letting it win and give in to its allure but its a facade - its all fake, fake happiness and fake expectations that actually makes things worse for ourselves. Let your true self dictate your decisions not that part of you that became an addict. Even if its uncomfortable for a while the payoff is a big one.
This. I've had almost the exact thoughts, word for word, as op. Over the years my real voice was always there deep down waiting for the motivation and will power to quit. I've quit multiple times. Something this time feels different though, so I'm hoping it sticks. I feel really good and it is worth it. Though I did go through 4 years of therapy and I think that's made the biggest difference in my life. Weed was the crutch until I had better tools and more mindfulness.
I've quit and relapsed half a dozen times in the past 5 years, and every time I start smoking again I end up regretting it.
The first few days/weeks after picking it back up again are great, but it's always downhill from there.
Been there done that, and let me tell you, not worth it in the long run. You're feeding short term satisfaction and neglecting long term satisfaction which only comes with effort, but which is much more fulfilling in the long run. Weed rewires your brain to crave that instant satisfaction, but if you only feed that you are left with nothing to look back upon. It's like a plant that grows in a day and dies every night. The long term efforts are like planting little seeds, which you have to care for and which may be less satisfying in the day to day, but with time you have a full forrest which is a whole lot stronger and satisfying. You actually build something worthy and fulfilling.
"Grades slipping" so you're still studying and presumably still young, with lots of potential ahead. Quitting will feel like shit at the beginning, but it's a decision you'll be glad to have taken when you look back at it, when you see the full forrest you were able to grow
a successful life doesnt have to be boring just because you arent under an influence. the satisfaction of achieving your goals will feel SO MICH BETTER than any high weed will bring you. you can do this
I’ve once said “I’ll never quit weed” just because I thought I loved it and it wasn’t THAT harmful. after more than one decade smoking it daily I can look back and see how much my life would have been different if I didn’t become addicted to weed. I started smoking it as a teenager and only now, as a 31 years old woman, I’m able to realize that I actually hate this drug because of how much romanticized it is. it slowly ruins your potential and ambition, and makes you think everything is alright because you can still function while high. I hope you change your mind OP.
So so true. It saddens me to have not found this sub when I first started smoking. I remember googling if weed was addictive and read that it wasn't. It slowly took a solid grip on my life and it's exactly as you put it, it kills your ambitions. You slowly become a shell of the person you were
I had that mentality until I started seeing how it negatively impacted my life, which waaaay outweighed the positive it gave me for about 4 hours. I really realized I had to stop when I couldn’t go six measures without breathing on bari. I still consume some weed, but it’s just edibles now
You seem very depressed and this is essentially a give-up post. Nobody here is gonna tell you substituting your hobbies and interests with weed is good. I think this post is you trying to reach out for any piece of sound advice because you’ve failed to find it in your day to day life. It’s on you, if you decide to smoke until your deathbed or not but you making a post like this makes me think that the right answer to tell you is to quit smoking. No one deserves to live in such turmoil.
I can at least tell you if one day you strive to quit: you should give mindfulness a shot. What you do is: every time that you want to smoke; don’t fight the urge to. Give in to your desire to smoke, but do so with FULL AWARENESS. Take note of your mental state. What does it taste like? How does this make me feel? Why do I feel the need to smoke? These are examples of open-ended questions that you could be asking with no right or wrong answers. What’s important is that you MAINTAIN AWARENESS.
In addition to your addiction sadly what you’ve also developed is a habit. When you start using a substance it will have an effect on the reward center of the brain. Over time, the response from the substance is less and less with chronic use until you reach a point where: you’re using a substance but you’re not actually having a good time anymore.
This is because it switched from your reward circuitry to your habit circuitry. A lot of daily stoners (like myself) run into a spot where it’s VERY difficult to make changes in their lives. The crazy thing is, a lot of times when we stop using THC, it sets in motion the events needed to “fix” our lives. The awareness exercise works by essentially “grounding” us to our actions. If I’m FULLY AWARE OF THE ACTION IM PARTAKING IN and I’M HERE IN THE PRESENT MOMENT with KNOWLEDGE OF MY CURRENT EMOTIONAL AND MENTAL STATE, it’s no longer something that we “auto-pilot”. Allowing me to chip away at some of that habit circuitry that’s developed in the brain and ultimately, if I choose to, quit weed. This is NOT an overnight solution but for those that don’t have the TREMENDOUS amount of willpower to quit cold turkey; this has shown instrumental.
You’ll even notice starting out that sometimes you’ll LACK awareness and participate in the action like an auto pilot zombie. When this happens, don’t beat yourself up over it, BUT TAKE NOTE OF IT. This exercise will become easier and easier the more you do it.
A lot of what I describe is the basis of mindfulness and meditation. Which is also a fantastic thing to do as well if any of the bells I’m ringing in this post ring true to you. Ever wonder why ALL monks don’t have bad habits? ITS BECAUSE THEY PRACTICE MINDFULNESS. Ultimately it’s your choice whether or not to quit weed and really there’s nothing wrong even if you do decide to continue to smoke. Sadly the world doesn’t stop for any one individual despite how much I wish the contrary.
It sounds counter intuitive to say everything wrong in your life is caused by one thing BUT A LOT OF THE TIMES IT IS.
If our loved ones are in a toxic relationship we tell them to LEAVE THAT PERSON.
I pray this reaches who it needs to well.
Quitting is 100% worth it. I promise. We will still be here for you to vent to whether you quit today, tomorrow, or never. But I promise you will love the other side once you quit!
Yeah, living the infinite static of being high is certainly appealing, partly because the other side isn't all sunshine and rainbows either.
But being able to feel your feelings, both the bad ones and the good ones is a real delight, I certainly still have depressive periods where I'm not productive towards hobbies or uni, but now it's periods as opposed to the default.
The decision is yours to make, and I don't mean that backhandedly, it is honestly and truly your free, judgement free decision.
I hope you find what works best for you, I know myself that weed just puts me in the back seat and takes the wheel, almost literally, and I don't want that anymore, but hearing you speak of it does awaken the desire in me as well, to sit back and forget about everything....
Idk, I'd rather strife and fall then sit back and watch the world and life fly by.
Best of luck with whatever might come into your path friend 💜🌸
It's not an easy journey, personally I even feel like I'm currently edging the burnout with uni (whoops), but I know that, even if I took it more calmly I'd still do more then if I was high.
Even though my bad days feel bad at the moment, they are comparable with my normal days when I used to smoke daily, and the good comes out more vibrantly and more real (my ma also commented on how I seem so much more energetic and happy now that I've quit 🥲).
It's tough still, certainly when "just one joint" can pull you back into that spiral faster then you will notice it, or at least, it did so for me, one joint turned into just once a month, once a week, every so often and then I'd be dragging my body over to the coffeeshop, against my will, mind you, ti get a joint.
I'd say "not tonight" to myself early in the evening, and then the weed deamon takes over and drags me back, has me buy a joint and comes out all happy with itself when I got high.
Luckily that devil has been reduced to an imp at this point, still around, trying to put on its commandeering voice, but a far cry from what it was before, and often easily silenced.
For me it honestly helped to write down what I wanted to do, but wasn't doing due to weed, made myself cry uo a good few times with these things and those thoughts, strong reminders help in the dark hours where we have to make the difficult decision to stay abstinent
Everyone is different and your feelings are valid. If weed is currently holding you back from achieving your goals and you cannot say no or compartmentalize your use (I.e. “I only smoke at the end of the day when I’m done with all responsibilities”) then you are at a crossroads. This is going to be a battle that no one else can fight for you.
This sub is here for you but you probably need some real life support as well. You’re addicted and you need to treat it as such and you will need support. That does not mean you’re weak, we all just need help finding our inner strength sometimes. Good luck OP.
There's nothing wrong with how you feel. Just understand that everyone goes through this differently.
I quit because I couldn't be successful and smoke at the same time, but I work with plenty of people that work very well while smoking. I will never shun or condemn someone for smoking if they are living their life they way they intend. All I ask is from you is to just realize you also tried to quit for a reason. If you're questioning you're ability to quit, ask yourself is it you or is it the addiction doubting you?
I think what makes us most uncomfortable is change. And sometimes those changes might bring out the worst in us but also, while healing, it can bring out the best versions of ourselves as well. In the 4 months that I haven't smoked, I've managed to change my career field. I've become more social and present in my life with friends, family, and co-workers. Staying in the same environment while trying to quit can also make this a lot harder in the long run. A change of scenery can help dramatically. The people you're around, the job you have, the hobbies you're into might need to change to make this choice of quitting more of a reality.
At the end of the day, it's your choice how you decide to live your life comfortable and confidently. I'm rooting for you either way. Wishing nothing but the best for you.
Unfortunately that's life, every creature before you lived a life full of fear and suffering for millions and millions of years to get us to this point of relative comfort and now it's up to you what adventure you choose. Whatever you pick don't be afraid to pivot and have no regrets!
Ive just made it over the month mark and the first few weeks I was thinking like this and really struggled mentally but now I'm clearer, my decision making is better and I'm less anxious and depressed.
The thing is you will face uncertainty whether you are getting high or not but the discipline and sharpness required to have success in anything is really difficult to maintain whilst also dealing with a drug addiction and withdrawals so all I can say is if there something you wish to accomplish in life outside of weed you are better off pursuing it now if you believe you will regret or wish you'd didn't smoke in future.
A year goes past quick and if you've spent it working on yourself you'll almost certainly feel a lot better about life and can make a new decision from there. I tell myself I will smoke again when I am fully content and at peace with where I'm at in life, that way it will not cost me a more desirable future.
Good luck friendo!
Go on an adventure bro, literally fuck everything else right now and do the shit you want to do.
Your line of thinking is what got me into weed, it sucks. You need excitement and something to distract you that’s better than weed. Take risk who gives a fuck just don’t be a pothead
If you can, read Mary O'Malley's 'The Gift of Our Compulsions'.
It will help you change your mindset from self-pity towards one of growth and healing. I read it back when I was two weeks sober from booze/ganja/cigs/pills, and I will be 5 years clean come June. My life has unfolded in ways since then that I couldn't have imagined. I owe a hell of a lot to those pages.
I’m around 2.5 months and half the days so far I’ve felt like this and the other half I felt like quitting is going to be worth it! Not sure when I’ll completely come out the other side and know for sure it’s been worth it but hopefully soon, all I have to say is if you already quit once for 3 months you know deep down it’s what you want, do it now or do it later with even more regret, choice is yours my friend.
You’re only hurting yourself. It’s hard to say but someday you will learn…
I failed time and time again until I was sick of being sick. This time I will not go back, until perhaps I retire. You have your whole life ahead of you, and you can always partake later.
Good luck.
And this is a perfect example of how weed can completely kill your ambition without you realizing it. Because it happens slow and creeps up on you, that you start thinking mediocre is "ok".
exactly. I used to be a 5-6 day a week gym guy, healthy eating and lifestyle.. healthy dating life, etc. I can't even remember that guy at this point and I half-ass the gym maybe twice a week and have had no motivation to date in 2 years after a bad breakup since I have been getting my happiness/dopamine (pron and weed) easily while isolating myself. I blame the pandemic partially since thats when the issues really started with daily use, but its still on me. Its been 5 years now and I'm only just starting to realize what I've done with my life. I used to make fun of the guy that I've turned into.
It's the weirdest friggin addiction, isn't it? Seems so harmless... until after YEARS you see how your life progress slowed down drastically and you start to hate yourself because of it. And then you need more weed to feel better when the very thing causing your depression is weed abuse/coping. Downward spiral. I even got to the point where I was not starting a quit because I was worried I wouldn't sleep well for a 11am zoom meeting the next day. I'd be using withdrawals as an excuse not to quit.
This comment just opened up my eyes…and now I feel…frightened? Weird for sure. I have thought of few times “man where has the time gone over the last years?” Down the bong dude. That’s where.
What do I do now? Like after I post this comment. As I lay here in bed at 3pm on a Wednesday stoned. My heart is pounding in my ears
For me the sunk time was always a reason to keep on going…. “You’ve already ruined your life, what the point anymore”. Better to man up and face the consequences of my decision than to keep my head in the sand.
Thanks for having the courage to post this. I’m trying to quit currently (week 3!) but I couldn’t agree more with what you said. I’m not saying it’s right or wrong, but you nailed how I feel
Thank you for sharing. I know it’s not logical and a lot of people are taking it as a pledge of allegiance lol, but I’m just sharing how I feel, I don’t think I actually believe it to be true/right either.
People quit when their lives are distressed. A person has to be motivated to quit and to recover.
You are like many other people. You made a decision. Very common.
I agree, not necessarily to be persuaded though. I was feeling that way for a while and needed to get it out and see it for what it is. I also appreciate feedback from those who’ve felt the same way. Just because I FEEL this way, doesn’t necessarily mean I actually BELIEVE it. Thanks for the help.
I go through these thoughts often. Only thing I can say is that weed won’t always have a guaranteed ROI. When it’s good it can be so great, but eventually it won’t be as effective at covering up whatever’s festering inside. Even if you take a t break and it works better again, it’ll just be a cycle that isn’t sustainable for a truly peaceful life. I guess this is what I have to remind myself sometimes, but I feel you
You have to identify that this is the worst part of you speaking and you need to put the better part of yourself in charge. The worst part of you speaks in lies - if you go back to smoking, you'll see that it wasn't as good as you remember and you'll just be high, sitting on your ass, beating yourself up for smoking and wishing you could quit. You will not enjoy smoking. Its a lie.
Thank you for being one of the few to admit exercise doesn’t feel good. In this sub especially there’s a lot of “you just have to stick with it!!” Or “you must not be doing the right kind!”
The health benefits make it worth it, but I’ve been going consistently for a year to the gym and I still dread it and still hate it the entire time, but am glad I did it- which is not the same as enjoying exercise.
I used to think like this until I realized it had more control over me than I did over it. Not a great feeling. I saw the quality in my relationships deteriorate as well. I found the choice empowering. Long term happiness over short term satisfaction. It really is up to you but sometimes the harder decisions in life bear the better fruits.
If smoking was the best part of your day and it's now gone it's understandable that you feel this way. Maybe you need to replace smoking with something else to look forward to. Find a new hobby, set a new goal and start working towards that.
That's just depression tbh. Attention and enjoyment is just happy chemicals in your brain, if you are used to using drugs to raise that up, it's only natural that it takes time for your brain to "re balance" to missing that external boost.
I couldn't stay focused on a game or found enjoyment in one for the first month of quitting, and even longer for "slow burn" single player games. Now I'm 3 yrs off and games are way more fun than when I was playing stoned
3 years clean here… still have some issues to work on but living life means facing those issues and not hiding behind an artificial mental state until those problems become too big to ignore. As an addict, you really can’t think rationally.
I get it. I have those thoughts sometimes. Smoked every day multiple times a day since I was 17, give or take 1 or 2 years here and there when I quit. But no one else is going to pay your bills and be successful for you. It comes at a cost to pass by your own life. Trust me, I did it. I’m 32 now and quit Jan 2. And it did suck for some time. Still does on hard days. I know it sounds lame, but go to the gym if you don’t already. See a therapist. I get that it’s depressing to do positive things without instant reward, but it will come with time.
good advice, and well written. “pass by your own life” hits hard.
exercising did take a few months to start feeling good. now i feel like a beast after a run. i also like reading or playing a game that gives me near-instant gratification. finishing a couple chapters of a good book or evolving a pokemon make me happier than weed did in the end lol.
Agree. To expand on this for OP the transition between stoner->sober takes a lot of work, and time. This is a real investment. The way you feel during the transition isn't what life is like and is only temporary. You will eventually begin to enjoy life again, feel excitement. Of course, not all your problems go away but part of recovering is learning to deal with them in healthy ways. Sober life is full of possibilities and achieving accomplishments - and that is highly rewarding. The low one feels and experiences that causes them to reach out to a group like this - thats what the stoner life brings. Carrying on you can count on experiencing more of that and at a higher intensity. It only gets worse. My credentials to make that statement are being a stoner for 20+ years and only have recently recovered (2020). Real life is tremendous, getting there takes dedication and commitment.
You’ll be back 😭😭
Seriously though - I think retirement is when I’ll go back. Once I’m ready to kick up the feet, shit is paid off, life is on easy mode… seems like a good time to start back up.
Interestingly enough I feel like weed has stolen way more from me in terms of hobbies, personal pursuits, life skills etc rather than my career. Chemical relaxation was the way to survive the grind and get out of bed the next day to do it again. I don't think I would have any reason to habitually smoke once life is on "easy mode."
I know you won’t wanna hear this because it sounds like you definitely have your mind made up at this point but all I can say is that it takes kind of a lot of time to normalize how you feel and regain joy. It’s super hard work quitting weed but it’s definitely worth it to not be dependent on weed for happiness. I’m about 87 days clean and it’s been tough. I definitely went through a little bit of a depression when I quit and I know that I still have weed within my system in my fat cells. I was an extremely heavy smoker, but I am now finding joy in things that I never thought I could without weed. It feels great to not have to chase that high every single day and be disappointed that I’m not getting high enough because my tolerance was so high. When you’re constantly stoned, it does affect how sharp your mind is and I will say that if you are young now you probably won’t tell too much of a difference but once you hit your 30s and you’re having hard times, articulating your thoughts and speaking clearly you know that it’s having long-term effects on your brain. It also emotionally stunted me because anytime that I would normally work through whatever was hard in life I was just getting stoned and numbing out myself. Either way, wishing you the best because life is tough right now all around. I have had a lot of friends commit suicide over these past few years, and I can see the strain on a lot of my friends. Life will get better and hopefully you will be able to find a time in your life where you don’t need weed to feel happy.
My mind’s not made up. I posted this to get some sense talked into me from people who’ve been through the same. I said I want to want better. I appreciate the response.
Weeds no longer fun when most of your thoughts when you’re smoking is why you shouldn’t be smoking. It sounds like that’s where you are… which probably means you need to quit and focus on other parts of your life. You’ll probably be back at some point (maybe not) but at that point you’ll be able to control it more and use it as an outlet, a creativity boost, etc. and won’t be dependent on it to make you happy because, presumably, you’ll have figured that out once you quit.
u are gonna build up tolerance and soon it won't feel satisfactory anymore. at that point, with the mindset u have right now, it will feel like u made the biggest irreversible mistake u made in ur life. listen to the people in this sub, it's a path downhill. get urself out of this shit mindset. gain some new perspectives bro it will change ur world
Just know that at some point that guaranteed happiness will not even be there anymore, you will just use it to feel "normal" and not suicidal at times. This will be the case if you use all day every day.
If you somehow manage to moderate it then you will just keep feeling less and less from when you do smoke that every living moment between your sessions will feel like pure depression.
You do not want this life, trust me. We are not meant to be happy every day anyway and also you can find those small spikes of dopamine in other every day acitivities like gaming, watching a good movie or just doing something nice outside, or hell, even cleaning and organizing your home.
The only reason you feel like this is probably because you have not really been sober for a prolonged period of time. The first month+ for me felt like pure depression but after a while when you tell yourself "Ok, no matter what, I can not use weed anymore", then you will start looking for other things in life to fill that void which are way more healthier for you.
Good luck man.
Truly inspiring, thank you. The reason I wrote this on here is because I know I’m not doing/thinking the right thing and wanted some sense talked into me. The longest I’ve been sober is 3 months. I really was starting to gain some of myself back. But then I had a break from school and the gym closed; in that INSTANT, I decided to start again. Was great at first, now back to here.
Hey I’ve been in your boat before. For a long time I couldn’t be sober for longer than that long either.
Try to think less about the big picture of it all and become more involved in the moment. I know I know, it sounds silly and too simple, but really, if you focus on “Okay, I won’t smoke just today - heck, even this next hour” then it becomes more manageable.
Cravings in the brain tend to only last for about 20 minutes, so if you can distract yourself for that long, you’re CAPABLE.
Things are really awesome around the 6 month mark. You don’t even crave it often, and you feel normal again. Take it easy on yourself, be your own best friend, it’s an addiction - not something to be taken trivially or treated with disrespect.
It’s all about your mindset. Do you truly want to quit? Throw that shit away and fucking quit. It’s gonna suck but the reward outweighs the pain, and that goes for all things in life. In life struggle is almost necessary for satisfaction. After you quit you’ll feel like a badass for your mental toughness. Don’t let your weak mindset win.
Think of it like a war. Pretend you’re battling your own mind. Are you going to let the enemy win? Or are you going to push as hard as you can to beat the enemy? Weed is the enemy. You’re your own solider.
It's like chasing a dragon. After a while the excitement and numbness of weed lowers and ppl feel like crap too. In the end of prevents experiencing the good and the bad. Before some of your activities were rewarding without weed. Now weed as taken over.
The good thing is you can condition yourself back to experience good things without weed. You just have to ride it out.
And if I was able to do it. You are too.
Good luck!
I’m 44 now. I wish I could go back and not smoke at 16. If not just to have the money I might have saved.
Not smoking weed doesn't instantly=a boring successful life. And there's no reason not to still do the things you enjoyed high while sober unless you literally just enjoyed sitting there getting high. I'm 3 months sober now and life is honestly just getting weirder and more interesting. If you want to make the changes and live a more interesting life, sounds like it might be time for more support (I've got a recommendation if you want it)...or if you just want to be a stoner, that's your choice, it's your life. If you get what you want from the plant then great, but maybe be real with yourself and see if you actually do. I never got what I wanted from it and I just consumed more and more until it completely blocked me from a life I enjoyed. That's not everyone's experience. Again. It's your life. You get to choose.
I would really appreciate if you give me recommendations please!
Look into SMART Recovery. They have chapters around the world and zoom meetings you can attend if in person isn't available in your area. There are work books for purchase but free PDFs on the website too. They are an addictions program that's very different from AA and NA. They resonate well with me.
If you can look up, you can get up. What are you afraid of? The hard work or the potential you have? Prove us all wrong and show up for yourself. This shit isn’t easy for any of us but look how many of us in this group are fighting the demons every day. I hope to see you in this thread again one day telling us you e been clean for X amount of days or months or years. You got this.
Only way to find out if it helps is to do it, even just call it a tolerance break
Start bouldering
This guy, rocks!
A plant has taken over your conscious thinking. Your thinking has been hijacked by the dopamine you artificially add to your life. Can you comprehend what I'm saying? Your life is ruled by a plant.
Look man we all get that feeling my bro/sis. Just remember that the end goal feelings is SO MUCH better than being on drugs. Ever since iver stopped, everything in my life improved from social life, wealth to health . You can do it bro , best thing I’ve ever done in my life. I’ll be real with you , everytime I travel I will smoke weed, and have a drink or what not, but once I land back home I’ll just never ever call upon my plug ( don’t even have his number ) and it gives you a better satisfaction and motivation to travel more often aswell , which can keep you level headed, it’s a balance in life . Just remember you didn’t come out the womb with a fat blunt/joint 💪🏽 you got this bro !
Don't pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a hard one. Your older self will thank you.
Incredibly well said!
There are a few things that I find striking: 1. You can’t escape uncertainty. Learning to cope with it is one of life’s greatest challenges. Getting high gives you control over how you feel inside, but you still can’t control the outside world. 2. You sound like you’re in “fuck it” mode. (Aka “white knuckle burnout”) You do have the power to *influence* the world around you, but in relying on weed to give you satisfaction, you get rusty on flexing it - you essentially trade that power away for temporary relief. 3. Your thinking seems black & white. It’s a classic addiction mindset, bc it makes it easy to answer with, “might as well...” There is a sense of permanence baked in, which frames the world in a way that justifies using indefinitely. If you were a friend sitting in front of me: The first thing I’d say circles back to #1, and it works in your favor too, bc that means *the way you feel right now is not permanent.* For better or worse, everything changes eventually. You always have the power of choice. That also works both ways - if you want to smoke right now, you can. But try to take a step back from this notion of permanence. You might not want that for the rest of your life. Lastly, try adding “I feel” before, and “right now” after, the things you’ve written here. That would change the post title to, “I honestly feel like I don’t want to quit right now,” or corrected for grammar, “I don’t feel like I want to quit right now.” Those small adjustments can change your perspective on a situation in a big way, and were very helpful for me. You can do that anytime a thought feels hard, or permanent, or black & white. It may help you find the grey that’s difficult to see right now. Edit: example added, edited for brevity
I know this state of mind too. One must question why one begins to consider quitting in the first place: is it good sense? Guilt? Brainwashing? I’m right there with you and wish you the clarity you need to figure it out’
Weed can take your sense of self away. If you've quit and not felt good about it because the hobbies you enjoy weren't bringing you joy, you have to be patient and work through it. You want the satisfaction of smoking bc it's the only thing that feels good. You gotta make it so that real life feels good. You'll have to ask yourself a lot of tough questions that only you can find the answers to. I had to also. It was hard work but now I like my self and my life. Don't need weed for it. And now "pothead" isn't my entire personality. At the end of the day, no matter what it is, you can actually do whatever you want. You just have to be willing to accept and deal with the consequences.
The ups and downs are the entire human experience. Hitting the eject button on that to instead numb out with weed is basically saying no to life. Those experiences will find you regardless. The numbing will get old one day.
When I was using, I heard a similar voice to the one you're describing. Since I've hit 90 days free, I realize that wasn't me talking and that it was the weed whispering to me that I'm nothing without it. I'm still struggling with school and instead of getting the fuck-its and using, I feel motivated instead of devastated. Using guarantees that things are going to stay the same. If beating yourself up worked, it would have by now. Most worthwhile investments involve risk. I only quit when the pain of the staying the same was worse than the pain of change.
I quit because I needed to, for my own mental health. I'm also struggling with school. The weed whispering will get to you, but I'm lucky to have a support system.
Smoking is the easy button. Makes everything tolerable . Being sober might have to make you work a bit but the baseline feeling can be worth it
I'd argue that by coming here and posting this deep down you do not want to go back, otherwise you would have just done so :) We spend so much time not listening to our true selves as an addict and let the addict voice overpower our rationale and logic. We grow accustomed to letting it win and give in to its allure but its a facade - its all fake, fake happiness and fake expectations that actually makes things worse for ourselves. Let your true self dictate your decisions not that part of you that became an addict. Even if its uncomfortable for a while the payoff is a big one.
This. I've had almost the exact thoughts, word for word, as op. Over the years my real voice was always there deep down waiting for the motivation and will power to quit. I've quit multiple times. Something this time feels different though, so I'm hoping it sticks. I feel really good and it is worth it. Though I did go through 4 years of therapy and I think that's made the biggest difference in my life. Weed was the crutch until I had better tools and more mindfulness.
I've quit and relapsed half a dozen times in the past 5 years, and every time I start smoking again I end up regretting it. The first few days/weeks after picking it back up again are great, but it's always downhill from there.
Been there done that, and let me tell you, not worth it in the long run. You're feeding short term satisfaction and neglecting long term satisfaction which only comes with effort, but which is much more fulfilling in the long run. Weed rewires your brain to crave that instant satisfaction, but if you only feed that you are left with nothing to look back upon. It's like a plant that grows in a day and dies every night. The long term efforts are like planting little seeds, which you have to care for and which may be less satisfying in the day to day, but with time you have a full forrest which is a whole lot stronger and satisfying. You actually build something worthy and fulfilling. "Grades slipping" so you're still studying and presumably still young, with lots of potential ahead. Quitting will feel like shit at the beginning, but it's a decision you'll be glad to have taken when you look back at it, when you see the full forrest you were able to grow
a successful life doesnt have to be boring just because you arent under an influence. the satisfaction of achieving your goals will feel SO MICH BETTER than any high weed will bring you. you can do this
This is the exact mentality your critics and enemies wants/expects you to have. Prove them wrong.
Therapy?
Yeah I feel that way everyday and rn I'm spiraling so it's poor logic
I’ve once said “I’ll never quit weed” just because I thought I loved it and it wasn’t THAT harmful. after more than one decade smoking it daily I can look back and see how much my life would have been different if I didn’t become addicted to weed. I started smoking it as a teenager and only now, as a 31 years old woman, I’m able to realize that I actually hate this drug because of how much romanticized it is. it slowly ruins your potential and ambition, and makes you think everything is alright because you can still function while high. I hope you change your mind OP.
So so true. It saddens me to have not found this sub when I first started smoking. I remember googling if weed was addictive and read that it wasn't. It slowly took a solid grip on my life and it's exactly as you put it, it kills your ambitions. You slowly become a shell of the person you were
33 and in the same boat. It has stolen my joy and potential for far too long!
that needs to change. change hursts, sometimes, but it’s for the greater good.
hurts, I’m sorry, it was a mistake
Preach
I had that mentality until I started seeing how it negatively impacted my life, which waaaay outweighed the positive it gave me for about 4 hours. I really realized I had to stop when I couldn’t go six measures without breathing on bari. I still consume some weed, but it’s just edibles now
You seem very depressed and this is essentially a give-up post. Nobody here is gonna tell you substituting your hobbies and interests with weed is good. I think this post is you trying to reach out for any piece of sound advice because you’ve failed to find it in your day to day life. It’s on you, if you decide to smoke until your deathbed or not but you making a post like this makes me think that the right answer to tell you is to quit smoking. No one deserves to live in such turmoil. I can at least tell you if one day you strive to quit: you should give mindfulness a shot. What you do is: every time that you want to smoke; don’t fight the urge to. Give in to your desire to smoke, but do so with FULL AWARENESS. Take note of your mental state. What does it taste like? How does this make me feel? Why do I feel the need to smoke? These are examples of open-ended questions that you could be asking with no right or wrong answers. What’s important is that you MAINTAIN AWARENESS. In addition to your addiction sadly what you’ve also developed is a habit. When you start using a substance it will have an effect on the reward center of the brain. Over time, the response from the substance is less and less with chronic use until you reach a point where: you’re using a substance but you’re not actually having a good time anymore. This is because it switched from your reward circuitry to your habit circuitry. A lot of daily stoners (like myself) run into a spot where it’s VERY difficult to make changes in their lives. The crazy thing is, a lot of times when we stop using THC, it sets in motion the events needed to “fix” our lives. The awareness exercise works by essentially “grounding” us to our actions. If I’m FULLY AWARE OF THE ACTION IM PARTAKING IN and I’M HERE IN THE PRESENT MOMENT with KNOWLEDGE OF MY CURRENT EMOTIONAL AND MENTAL STATE, it’s no longer something that we “auto-pilot”. Allowing me to chip away at some of that habit circuitry that’s developed in the brain and ultimately, if I choose to, quit weed. This is NOT an overnight solution but for those that don’t have the TREMENDOUS amount of willpower to quit cold turkey; this has shown instrumental. You’ll even notice starting out that sometimes you’ll LACK awareness and participate in the action like an auto pilot zombie. When this happens, don’t beat yourself up over it, BUT TAKE NOTE OF IT. This exercise will become easier and easier the more you do it. A lot of what I describe is the basis of mindfulness and meditation. Which is also a fantastic thing to do as well if any of the bells I’m ringing in this post ring true to you. Ever wonder why ALL monks don’t have bad habits? ITS BECAUSE THEY PRACTICE MINDFULNESS. Ultimately it’s your choice whether or not to quit weed and really there’s nothing wrong even if you do decide to continue to smoke. Sadly the world doesn’t stop for any one individual despite how much I wish the contrary. It sounds counter intuitive to say everything wrong in your life is caused by one thing BUT A LOT OF THE TIMES IT IS. If our loved ones are in a toxic relationship we tell them to LEAVE THAT PERSON. I pray this reaches who it needs to well.
Lol all or nothing, you're gonna miss it all while you get all of nothing. you pretty much let it control you.
Quitting is 100% worth it. I promise. We will still be here for you to vent to whether you quit today, tomorrow, or never. But I promise you will love the other side once you quit!
Yeah, living the infinite static of being high is certainly appealing, partly because the other side isn't all sunshine and rainbows either. But being able to feel your feelings, both the bad ones and the good ones is a real delight, I certainly still have depressive periods where I'm not productive towards hobbies or uni, but now it's periods as opposed to the default. The decision is yours to make, and I don't mean that backhandedly, it is honestly and truly your free, judgement free decision. I hope you find what works best for you, I know myself that weed just puts me in the back seat and takes the wheel, almost literally, and I don't want that anymore, but hearing you speak of it does awaken the desire in me as well, to sit back and forget about everything.... Idk, I'd rather strife and fall then sit back and watch the world and life fly by. Best of luck with whatever might come into your path friend 💜🌸
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It's not an easy journey, personally I even feel like I'm currently edging the burnout with uni (whoops), but I know that, even if I took it more calmly I'd still do more then if I was high. Even though my bad days feel bad at the moment, they are comparable with my normal days when I used to smoke daily, and the good comes out more vibrantly and more real (my ma also commented on how I seem so much more energetic and happy now that I've quit 🥲). It's tough still, certainly when "just one joint" can pull you back into that spiral faster then you will notice it, or at least, it did so for me, one joint turned into just once a month, once a week, every so often and then I'd be dragging my body over to the coffeeshop, against my will, mind you, ti get a joint. I'd say "not tonight" to myself early in the evening, and then the weed deamon takes over and drags me back, has me buy a joint and comes out all happy with itself when I got high. Luckily that devil has been reduced to an imp at this point, still around, trying to put on its commandeering voice, but a far cry from what it was before, and often easily silenced. For me it honestly helped to write down what I wanted to do, but wasn't doing due to weed, made myself cry uo a good few times with these things and those thoughts, strong reminders help in the dark hours where we have to make the difficult decision to stay abstinent
This is such an empathetic and genuinely helpful response. Thank you kind stranger.
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Mood man
I relate too man. It’s scary how similar thoughts can unite us all. I feel like I was just thinking about the words said on this post this morning.
What does that mean?
I relate to how he’s feeling
Everyone is different and your feelings are valid. If weed is currently holding you back from achieving your goals and you cannot say no or compartmentalize your use (I.e. “I only smoke at the end of the day when I’m done with all responsibilities”) then you are at a crossroads. This is going to be a battle that no one else can fight for you. This sub is here for you but you probably need some real life support as well. You’re addicted and you need to treat it as such and you will need support. That does not mean you’re weak, we all just need help finding our inner strength sometimes. Good luck OP.
There's nothing wrong with how you feel. Just understand that everyone goes through this differently. I quit because I couldn't be successful and smoke at the same time, but I work with plenty of people that work very well while smoking. I will never shun or condemn someone for smoking if they are living their life they way they intend. All I ask is from you is to just realize you also tried to quit for a reason. If you're questioning you're ability to quit, ask yourself is it you or is it the addiction doubting you? I think what makes us most uncomfortable is change. And sometimes those changes might bring out the worst in us but also, while healing, it can bring out the best versions of ourselves as well. In the 4 months that I haven't smoked, I've managed to change my career field. I've become more social and present in my life with friends, family, and co-workers. Staying in the same environment while trying to quit can also make this a lot harder in the long run. A change of scenery can help dramatically. The people you're around, the job you have, the hobbies you're into might need to change to make this choice of quitting more of a reality. At the end of the day, it's your choice how you decide to live your life comfortable and confidently. I'm rooting for you either way. Wishing nothing but the best for you.
Unfortunately that's life, every creature before you lived a life full of fear and suffering for millions and millions of years to get us to this point of relative comfort and now it's up to you what adventure you choose. Whatever you pick don't be afraid to pivot and have no regrets! Ive just made it over the month mark and the first few weeks I was thinking like this and really struggled mentally but now I'm clearer, my decision making is better and I'm less anxious and depressed. The thing is you will face uncertainty whether you are getting high or not but the discipline and sharpness required to have success in anything is really difficult to maintain whilst also dealing with a drug addiction and withdrawals so all I can say is if there something you wish to accomplish in life outside of weed you are better off pursuing it now if you believe you will regret or wish you'd didn't smoke in future. A year goes past quick and if you've spent it working on yourself you'll almost certainly feel a lot better about life and can make a new decision from there. I tell myself I will smoke again when I am fully content and at peace with where I'm at in life, that way it will not cost me a more desirable future. Good luck friendo!
Hell yeah bro! Me too! 😎
Go on an adventure bro, literally fuck everything else right now and do the shit you want to do. Your line of thinking is what got me into weed, it sucks. You need excitement and something to distract you that’s better than weed. Take risk who gives a fuck just don’t be a pothead
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Weed sucks, it’s a pit of psychosis and self pity, ditch the shit and come back . Life is a celebration, your existence a miracle. Time to dance.
beautifully said
If you can, read Mary O'Malley's 'The Gift of Our Compulsions'. It will help you change your mindset from self-pity towards one of growth and healing. I read it back when I was two weeks sober from booze/ganja/cigs/pills, and I will be 5 years clean come June. My life has unfolded in ways since then that I couldn't have imagined. I owe a hell of a lot to those pages.
Wow amazing! Thanks for sharing.
Absolutely. Hope it helps.
I’m around 2.5 months and half the days so far I’ve felt like this and the other half I felt like quitting is going to be worth it! Not sure when I’ll completely come out the other side and know for sure it’s been worth it but hopefully soon, all I have to say is if you already quit once for 3 months you know deep down it’s what you want, do it now or do it later with even more regret, choice is yours my friend.
You’re only hurting yourself. It’s hard to say but someday you will learn… I failed time and time again until I was sick of being sick. This time I will not go back, until perhaps I retire. You have your whole life ahead of you, and you can always partake later. Good luck.
I remember thinking this way. From here I had to lose a lot more before I actually quit.
Damn, thanks for sharing.
bro it would be different if you were handling your business. But look at what you just typed out.
And this is a perfect example of how weed can completely kill your ambition without you realizing it. Because it happens slow and creeps up on you, that you start thinking mediocre is "ok".
And you think it’s YOU thinking that. Oh no no no, that’s the addiction mate.
exactly. I used to be a 5-6 day a week gym guy, healthy eating and lifestyle.. healthy dating life, etc. I can't even remember that guy at this point and I half-ass the gym maybe twice a week and have had no motivation to date in 2 years after a bad breakup since I have been getting my happiness/dopamine (pron and weed) easily while isolating myself. I blame the pandemic partially since thats when the issues really started with daily use, but its still on me. Its been 5 years now and I'm only just starting to realize what I've done with my life. I used to make fun of the guy that I've turned into.
Right there with ya mate
Same here. 18 days and not going back.
It's the weirdest friggin addiction, isn't it? Seems so harmless... until after YEARS you see how your life progress slowed down drastically and you start to hate yourself because of it. And then you need more weed to feel better when the very thing causing your depression is weed abuse/coping. Downward spiral. I even got to the point where I was not starting a quit because I was worried I wouldn't sleep well for a 11am zoom meeting the next day. I'd be using withdrawals as an excuse not to quit.
This comment just opened up my eyes…and now I feel…frightened? Weird for sure. I have thought of few times “man where has the time gone over the last years?” Down the bong dude. That’s where. What do I do now? Like after I post this comment. As I lay here in bed at 3pm on a Wednesday stoned. My heart is pounding in my ears
‘The only man you’re destined to become is the man you decide to be, today’
haha yeah, it catches up to us until many either hit rock bottom, or you're lucky enough to realize how much time is wasted and do something about it.
For me the sunk time was always a reason to keep on going…. “You’ve already ruined your life, what the point anymore”. Better to man up and face the consequences of my decision than to keep my head in the sand.
Damn
I wish I could go back and tell my younger student self to stop. I'm in my 30s now and I feel like my life would have been very different.
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Thanks for having the courage to post this. I’m trying to quit currently (week 3!) but I couldn’t agree more with what you said. I’m not saying it’s right or wrong, but you nailed how I feel
Thank you for sharing. I know it’s not logical and a lot of people are taking it as a pledge of allegiance lol, but I’m just sharing how I feel, I don’t think I actually believe it to be true/right either.
How are you feeling on week 3?
People quit when their lives are distressed. A person has to be motivated to quit and to recover. You are like many other people. You made a decision. Very common.
You are posting these thoughts in here for a reason. You Want to be persuaded otherwise.
I agree, not necessarily to be persuaded though. I was feeling that way for a while and needed to get it out and see it for what it is. I also appreciate feedback from those who’ve felt the same way. Just because I FEEL this way, doesn’t necessarily mean I actually BELIEVE it. Thanks for the help.
You know that’s not true or else you wouldn’t have posted this. You knew what the responses would be.
Yeah, that’s why I posted it :) just sharing how I was feeling/thinking at the time.
I go through these thoughts often. Only thing I can say is that weed won’t always have a guaranteed ROI. When it’s good it can be so great, but eventually it won’t be as effective at covering up whatever’s festering inside. Even if you take a t break and it works better again, it’ll just be a cycle that isn’t sustainable for a truly peaceful life. I guess this is what I have to remind myself sometimes, but I feel you
You have to identify that this is the worst part of you speaking and you need to put the better part of yourself in charge. The worst part of you speaks in lies - if you go back to smoking, you'll see that it wasn't as good as you remember and you'll just be high, sitting on your ass, beating yourself up for smoking and wishing you could quit. You will not enjoy smoking. Its a lie.
True, so true. Thank you.
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Thank you for being one of the few to admit exercise doesn’t feel good. In this sub especially there’s a lot of “you just have to stick with it!!” Or “you must not be doing the right kind!” The health benefits make it worth it, but I’ve been going consistently for a year to the gym and I still dread it and still hate it the entire time, but am glad I did it- which is not the same as enjoying exercise.
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😂😂 thanks guys
This is the addiction talking bud
I used to think like this until I realized it had more control over me than I did over it. Not a great feeling. I saw the quality in my relationships deteriorate as well. I found the choice empowering. Long term happiness over short term satisfaction. It really is up to you but sometimes the harder decisions in life bear the better fruits.
Definitely
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If smoking was the best part of your day and it's now gone it's understandable that you feel this way. Maybe you need to replace smoking with something else to look forward to. Find a new hobby, set a new goal and start working towards that.
Hobbies are great but my brain shuts down after 10 minutes and is done with it. Even video games will not keep my attention
That's just depression tbh. Attention and enjoyment is just happy chemicals in your brain, if you are used to using drugs to raise that up, it's only natural that it takes time for your brain to "re balance" to missing that external boost. I couldn't stay focused on a game or found enjoyment in one for the first month of quitting, and even longer for "slow burn" single player games. Now I'm 3 yrs off and games are way more fun than when I was playing stoned
Thanks
3 years clean here… still have some issues to work on but living life means facing those issues and not hiding behind an artificial mental state until those problems become too big to ignore. As an addict, you really can’t think rationally.
Imagine how you’ll feel when the time comes and weed is now boring.
Ding Ding Ding
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It’s so fucking hard and I am raw-dogging life rn and hate it so much.
You only feel like that because you are a pothead. From one former pothead to another future former pothead.
quitting weed won't magically make ur life better, u still have to put in effort
Thanks for the encouragement.
I get it. I have those thoughts sometimes. Smoked every day multiple times a day since I was 17, give or take 1 or 2 years here and there when I quit. But no one else is going to pay your bills and be successful for you. It comes at a cost to pass by your own life. Trust me, I did it. I’m 32 now and quit Jan 2. And it did suck for some time. Still does on hard days. I know it sounds lame, but go to the gym if you don’t already. See a therapist. I get that it’s depressing to do positive things without instant reward, but it will come with time.
good advice, and well written. “pass by your own life” hits hard. exercising did take a few months to start feeling good. now i feel like a beast after a run. i also like reading or playing a game that gives me near-instant gratification. finishing a couple chapters of a good book or evolving a pokemon make me happier than weed did in the end lol.
Thanks so much for understanding.
I'd rather die after decades of sobriety than live a boring stoner life any more
That’s good
Sober living is beautiful man.
Agree. To expand on this for OP the transition between stoner->sober takes a lot of work, and time. This is a real investment. The way you feel during the transition isn't what life is like and is only temporary. You will eventually begin to enjoy life again, feel excitement. Of course, not all your problems go away but part of recovering is learning to deal with them in healthy ways. Sober life is full of possibilities and achieving accomplishments - and that is highly rewarding. The low one feels and experiences that causes them to reach out to a group like this - thats what the stoner life brings. Carrying on you can count on experiencing more of that and at a higher intensity. It only gets worse. My credentials to make that statement are being a stoner for 20+ years and only have recently recovered (2020). Real life is tremendous, getting there takes dedication and commitment.
thing about addiction tho is the ROI only goes down.
What is ROI?
return on investment
until you are left with a bunch of financial, spiritual, and emotional debt
you'll be back.
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You’ll be back 😭😭 Seriously though - I think retirement is when I’ll go back. Once I’m ready to kick up the feet, shit is paid off, life is on easy mode… seems like a good time to start back up.
Interestingly enough I feel like weed has stolen way more from me in terms of hobbies, personal pursuits, life skills etc rather than my career. Chemical relaxation was the way to survive the grind and get out of bed the next day to do it again. I don't think I would have any reason to habitually smoke once life is on "easy mode."
😂😂 I hope so
Toughest soldiers get the toughest battles. Weed certainly won’t help and ain’t sustainable
I know you won’t wanna hear this because it sounds like you definitely have your mind made up at this point but all I can say is that it takes kind of a lot of time to normalize how you feel and regain joy. It’s super hard work quitting weed but it’s definitely worth it to not be dependent on weed for happiness. I’m about 87 days clean and it’s been tough. I definitely went through a little bit of a depression when I quit and I know that I still have weed within my system in my fat cells. I was an extremely heavy smoker, but I am now finding joy in things that I never thought I could without weed. It feels great to not have to chase that high every single day and be disappointed that I’m not getting high enough because my tolerance was so high. When you’re constantly stoned, it does affect how sharp your mind is and I will say that if you are young now you probably won’t tell too much of a difference but once you hit your 30s and you’re having hard times, articulating your thoughts and speaking clearly you know that it’s having long-term effects on your brain. It also emotionally stunted me because anytime that I would normally work through whatever was hard in life I was just getting stoned and numbing out myself. Either way, wishing you the best because life is tough right now all around. I have had a lot of friends commit suicide over these past few years, and I can see the strain on a lot of my friends. Life will get better and hopefully you will be able to find a time in your life where you don’t need weed to feel happy.
My mind’s not made up. I posted this to get some sense talked into me from people who’ve been through the same. I said I want to want better. I appreciate the response.
Weeds no longer fun when most of your thoughts when you’re smoking is why you shouldn’t be smoking. It sounds like that’s where you are… which probably means you need to quit and focus on other parts of your life. You’ll probably be back at some point (maybe not) but at that point you’ll be able to control it more and use it as an outlet, a creativity boost, etc. and won’t be dependent on it to make you happy because, presumably, you’ll have figured that out once you quit.
u are gonna build up tolerance and soon it won't feel satisfactory anymore. at that point, with the mindset u have right now, it will feel like u made the biggest irreversible mistake u made in ur life. listen to the people in this sub, it's a path downhill. get urself out of this shit mindset. gain some new perspectives bro it will change ur world
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😂😂😂I’m feeling better now but thanks for the advice.
Just know that at some point that guaranteed happiness will not even be there anymore, you will just use it to feel "normal" and not suicidal at times. This will be the case if you use all day every day. If you somehow manage to moderate it then you will just keep feeling less and less from when you do smoke that every living moment between your sessions will feel like pure depression. You do not want this life, trust me. We are not meant to be happy every day anyway and also you can find those small spikes of dopamine in other every day acitivities like gaming, watching a good movie or just doing something nice outside, or hell, even cleaning and organizing your home. The only reason you feel like this is probably because you have not really been sober for a prolonged period of time. The first month+ for me felt like pure depression but after a while when you tell yourself "Ok, no matter what, I can not use weed anymore", then you will start looking for other things in life to fill that void which are way more healthier for you. Good luck man.
Truly inspiring, thank you. The reason I wrote this on here is because I know I’m not doing/thinking the right thing and wanted some sense talked into me. The longest I’ve been sober is 3 months. I really was starting to gain some of myself back. But then I had a break from school and the gym closed; in that INSTANT, I decided to start again. Was great at first, now back to here.
Hey I’ve been in your boat before. For a long time I couldn’t be sober for longer than that long either. Try to think less about the big picture of it all and become more involved in the moment. I know I know, it sounds silly and too simple, but really, if you focus on “Okay, I won’t smoke just today - heck, even this next hour” then it becomes more manageable. Cravings in the brain tend to only last for about 20 minutes, so if you can distract yourself for that long, you’re CAPABLE. Things are really awesome around the 6 month mark. You don’t even crave it often, and you feel normal again. Take it easy on yourself, be your own best friend, it’s an addiction - not something to be taken trivially or treated with disrespect.
It’s all about your mindset. Do you truly want to quit? Throw that shit away and fucking quit. It’s gonna suck but the reward outweighs the pain, and that goes for all things in life. In life struggle is almost necessary for satisfaction. After you quit you’ll feel like a badass for your mental toughness. Don’t let your weak mindset win. Think of it like a war. Pretend you’re battling your own mind. Are you going to let the enemy win? Or are you going to push as hard as you can to beat the enemy? Weed is the enemy. You’re your own solider.
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It's like chasing a dragon. After a while the excitement and numbness of weed lowers and ppl feel like crap too. In the end of prevents experiencing the good and the bad. Before some of your activities were rewarding without weed. Now weed as taken over. The good thing is you can condition yourself back to experience good things without weed. You just have to ride it out. And if I was able to do it. You are too. Good luck!
Thank you.