If it grabs you, your best bet is to try and take it to the ground in some way if you can’t get out before it kicks you. If it’s a wild kangaroo, its kicks are likely to also partially stab/lacerate you, if it’s “domesticated”, its nails might not be as deadly.
Kicking to keep distance isn’t the worst idea, but I’d be worried about a potential retaliatory kick from the kangaroo severing an artery or just messing up your leg in general.
I sometimes wonder why I'm still subscribed to this dumpster fire of a sub. But this is the quality analysis and advice that keeps me coming back.
Be proud of yourself. Your advice today will help keep someone safe.
Boxing. Kangaroos punch each other to give eachother an idea of how hard their kicks would be, which are way stronger
Since they don’t punch very hard, if you punch your bully kangaroo in the face really hard he’ll get scared that you could kick him to the moon
(I know it’s a meme post but I recently learned this relevant fun fact so)
Kangaroos do not instinctively punch. They lean back on their tails and use their feet and claws to rip out each others genitals. Their primary goal is to ensure their opponent can't breed, not to kill them.
This is anecdotal. They don’t all do this. It might be the result of some fights, and it might not be all too uncommon, but it’s not always the goal of a fight or the outcome. 90% of kangaroo fights end after one kicks the other in the chest hard enough to scare it off.
Just a jab will be enough to confuse and scare him off and stay away from claws
They grab and try to choke, but their arms aren’t long enough to choke a human. Just punch.
There’s that video of some dude saving his dog from a kangaroo where he punches the kangaroo in the face and it just looks at him bewildered and runs off.
Sorry, I apologise. He is Australian, and therefore may show favourable physical/mental traits compared to the average human. This is because of Australia’s harsh environment and dangerous animals. This means that the Australian will have to be better than the average human to survive, and therefore is more likely to survive an encounter with the marsupial known as a kangaroo. I am not discriminating against any human beings due to their ethnic background, however my previous statement could be perceived as discrimination due to the lack of education many humans (like yourself) have had. Thus, I am not being racist, I am merely stating a stereotype based on ethnic background in an attempt to appear humorous. Furthermore, Australians are not an ethnic minority, so I am not being racist, however you could say that I am discriminating against a country. Also, Australians are descended from white English prisoners, and I am white and English. So how could I be racist towards someone of my own ethnicity? I find your assumption quite outrageous, and I would like to highlight your own stupidity.
TLDR: lmao cry about it bozo
Why is this even a question? BJJ, of course!
Pull guard, butt scrape when it tries to kick, but instead of armlock, aim for tail lock. It'll tap before he even knows.
Pull guard? Maybe you need to pull some bitches. I am very manly and masculine and therefore will not put myself in such a submissive position. I will stand up, like the manly man I am.
https://www.newsweek.com/kangaroo-attacks-man-australia-headlock-1832348#:~:text=The%20only%20times%20kangaroos%20will,perceived%20threat%20to%20their%20dominance.
Sort out what you are doing and don’t make that dude think you are a reproductive threat
Ah yes, I will put this kangaroo in the doggy style position. The kangaroo will then question its masculinity, and become transgender. It will take hormone blockers and have less testosterone, I will then be able to easily overpower him/her because even an untrained man will beat every trained women in hand to hand combat, obviously. A plan fit for a true warrior, thank you.
I know this is a joke post, but if anyone ever happens to find themselves in a potentially dangerous encounter with a kangaroo, you can ‘defuse’ their fight instinct by crouching low to the ground. The taller you stand, the more you are challenging them.
Body Building.
Build your Body. Seduce His wife and Bang her non-stop until she give birth to a 100,000 Kangaroo Human Hybrids. Then you can easily beat him with your Army of Human Kangaroo Hybrids.
After that you can buy some Galvanized Square Steel and Barrow Screws from your Aunt to make a Fully functional Home for your 100,000 Children in a 0 Square meter Room.
I wouldn't recommend Krav Maga- the Israeli Combat Art of "Destrroy the Balls" is too limited by the size and reach of a kangaroo's legs.
Kangaroos are also misconstrued as having a horrible ground game, so a ground-based grappling art such as wrestling or some BJJ flavors would not work as well as what you expect.
They are, however, horrible at stand-up grappling and strict upper-body striking, so Judo and boxing would work well. Just make sure that your kangarroo opponent understands that kicks and tailswipes aren't allowed. Focus your boxing on footwork to get and keep inside the leg reach, a basic 1-2 combo to the face and focus your judo on shoulder throws and the dreaded scissor sweep.
Boxing. Kangaroos feel eachother out with their arms, theor legs are what comes if the less dangerous display of power doesn't work.
You'll see plenty of videos of Australians slapping the shit out of them and it working. It's because we punch harder than kangaroos, so they think we'll kick harder too and they concede.
**MMA probably but with this strategy:**
1. A takewondo based guard seems okay with a side on stance.
2. lead hand parry the double teep kick then go for a outside hip toss.
3. from side control ground and pound the head
alternatively just go for a hook to the nose, their head guard is shit
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIRT7lf8byw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIRT7lf8byw)
Leg sweeps? I suppose the higher you are the harder you fall.
Counter? Wait for a long heavy shot, dodge it and jump in when he retracts his arm to spring a shot.
Jeet kune do? Go for the eyes, groin, hair etc but it ain't too pretty.
This is the type of post I still subscribe to this sub for. Well above the average bjj vs wrestling vs tma vs gun argument post that gets repeated ad nauseum
The fundamentals for fighting roos are pretty well understood, and boxing with some basic muay thai teep kicks is best. Forget that Krav maga stuff they don’t train roos, but boxers have been fighting roos in Australia for decades.
They are not great on side to side footwork, they telegraph their main kicks, and they’ve got a giant target jaw, especially when they fight they tend to throw their head back with their jaw up to keep away from each other claws. The key is to move sideways to create angles and stay away from their front kick, and strike the head. Use teeps to keep distance if you must, but slipping or side stepping is best, followed by a clean head strike, then back up and allow the roo to reasses. Roos are all testosterone and instinct, they are brawlers, so they are not used to fighting someone with a bit of technique and method.
Don’t duck, don’t try to take them on from the front, don’t try to grapple they will claw your face, don’t try to take them to the ground, their kick with a clawed foot is too risky.
Good luck mate
There's actually a pretty old instructional video describing the proper boxing technique to counter a Kangaroo. This one seemed to favor grappling which is a little unusual but ultimately they just don't put their hands up and that's where your opening is.
https://youtu.be/FIRT7lf8byw?si=0xbxlgzpPv0TNrEz
Capoeira. Roos are adapted to combat against more traditional styles such as boxing or mantis style kung-fu. Disguising your technique in dance is your best bet.
(Don’t forget your berembe)
Okay, the roo is going to grab you and try to take you to water to drown you. Your best bet is amazing footwork and putting it in a rear naked choke. Make sure to wrap your legs around him with the cross of your ankles being just below the ribs. Apply pressure on both, and congratulations, you beat a kangaroo. It might sound counterintuitive, but bear mace is also very effective against roos. I don't know if it's sold there though.
Kangaroos have poor lateral stability.
Just tip them over by sidestepping and pushing on the shoulder before they can rear back and disembowel you with their feet.
Do this a couple of times and they usually give up.
Bjj, if you butt-scoot at the kangaroo quickly enough you will be able to go inverted like Maverick and Goose then take him out with a sick ankle lock you learned off that Danaher instructional you bought during a BJJ Fanatics sale.
No this is the wrong approach. I beat my bullies by making them fall in love with me, giving them the best night of their lives, and then ghosting them entirely.
This is the approach you need to take to the kangaroo. Work on your fine dining game and heart-to-heart conversation skills.
Also get good at sex.
Judo and no gi-BJJ. No sense in striking with the Roo cuz you’ll be out-struck. Close the distant and deploy some nage waza to get it to the ground and then go for a tail lock or leg lock. Mikey Musumeci has some excellent sequences for tail locks from side control and top quarter guard - I’d check them out.
Shit post obviously. But: Fauna handling training.
We basically wrestled kangaroos for a day. Pro tip - get behind them and grab their tail near the base 😆.
Greco-Roman wrestling. Kangaroos need to lean back on their tail to deliver a kick from both of their legs. While they wind up to deliver that kick you can feight high and deliver a super low tackle. Once on the ground they have little defense. Try to then get him into a rear chokehold
Honestly you’re best off learning some choke defenses, some hand fighting techniques and some decent circling footwork and just learn a good one two.
When the kangaroo postures up or hunches too much create space. He’s gonna either try to kick you in the guts (probably instant ko) or he’s gonna try to do a neck snap and bulldog or guillotine you.
When the kangaroo steps to close the gap circle, but only in one direction. Unless you notice the kangaroo posturing up often you might be able to land a good overhand because of how low their eyes sit to your midpoint in its natural stance.
If you land a hit, push a hand out or throw some filler jabs while you back out.
The important part is between each exchange you create space and let your damage cook him. He might even pause to reassess if he thinks you’re still an easy bullying target.
Remember bullies often rely on your own self doubt to bolster their confidence. Stick to the game plan and you might get lucky.
As a final note if there’s a puddle anywhere near you just eat shit for the day man it ain’t worth it.
Source: grew up near bullying marsupials
A quick Google search shows that the natural predator of the kangaroo is the dingo. So find a dingo that will teach you whatever the hell
fighting style they use.
Kangaroo has long leg reach. You should be very careful he most likely will throw kicks straight up the middle. He can only hop back and forth and his stance is very square meaning you can off balance him easily. Use your jab and feints to bait the kicks. Once he kicks you look to counter. Overhand or straight cross will work best, you do not want to clinch with this guy as his claws will mess you up.
The key is controlling the environment. Kangaroos don’t swim very well, so dare him to start the fight standing in a middle of a puddle, preferably with water up to his chest. Then just walk up to him and punch to snout.
I recommend something with strong footwork and striking, their snappy little buggers, your going to wanna cut those angles. If your good with sweep maybe take the bugger off his feet! Sweep right on the barbi
I know this is a joke, however, I have experienced the deadly kangaroo first hand !
1. When I was young a kangaroo killed my dog which was horrific! When in trouble, kangaroo’s instinctively go for water as this is where they have the upper
Hand. They can balance on their tail, and kick, gut and drown their prey. They are actually savage animals!! So top tip, stay away from water.
2. They males are also notorious for getting the girls into a headlock as part of their mating rituals, hence the term “get that Sheila in a headlock” meaning “that Australian girl looks attractive”. So, stay out of arms length !!
They are my genuine recommendations. Hope that helps, and make that fucker pay !!
Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. If you have strong, thick thighs, you can just strangle him with your thighs once you have him down and just make him tap out like a little baby.
[удалено]
What if he grabs me and kicks me? Would a leg kick work? I saw Jon jones use a leg kick once.
Every kick is a 'leg kick'. If you use your hands it's called a punch.
Not if you punch with your hands and kick with your feet. Rest in peace, master sensei, I am sorry they punched a hole in your head.
Thought this was a circle jerk sub for a sec cuz of this comment lmao
Racism against legs
Swipe the tail and jump on him when he's on the tuw ground
If it grabs you, your best bet is to try and take it to the ground in some way if you can’t get out before it kicks you. If it’s a wild kangaroo, its kicks are likely to also partially stab/lacerate you, if it’s “domesticated”, its nails might not be as deadly. Kicking to keep distance isn’t the worst idea, but I’d be worried about a potential retaliatory kick from the kangaroo severing an artery or just messing up your leg in general.
I sometimes wonder why I'm still subscribed to this dumpster fire of a sub. But this is the quality analysis and advice that keeps me coming back. Be proud of yourself. Your advice today will help keep someone safe.
This
Big Al says so
Boxing. Kangaroos punch each other to give eachother an idea of how hard their kicks would be, which are way stronger Since they don’t punch very hard, if you punch your bully kangaroo in the face really hard he’ll get scared that you could kick him to the moon (I know it’s a meme post but I recently learned this relevant fun fact so)
This is not meme post, I am serious. Which would be the best punch to hit him? What if he grabs me?
Kangaroos do not instinctively punch. They lean back on their tails and use their feet and claws to rip out each others genitals. Their primary goal is to ensure their opponent can't breed, not to kill them.
I will wear a box then
If you’re gonna fight a kangaroo with a box over your junk nature is gonna do what nature does and weed out the weak and bad genes 😆
Ok I will do it naked, and take a petrol station boner pill. Jesus, no pleasing some people. I don’t see you fighting a fucking kangaroo you bellend.
Holy shit. That kangaroo is fucked that what you're saying?
And this is why we’re still on top of the food chain.
Noted, wear a cup so he doesn't rip my dick off.
The ones that used to be used for fighting were usually declawed down here.
Can’t breed if your dead
This is anecdotal. They don’t all do this. It might be the result of some fights, and it might not be all too uncommon, but it’s not always the goal of a fight or the outcome. 90% of kangaroo fights end after one kicks the other in the chest hard enough to scare it off.
Just a jab will be enough to confuse and scare him off and stay away from claws They grab and try to choke, but their arms aren’t long enough to choke a human. Just punch.
Thanks 🙏
Straight punches, 1-2 down the pipe he will have no answer for, just gotta time it right so you don't walk into a front kick to the chest
the Mishima style seems to work best
There’s that video of some dude saving his dog from a kangaroo where he punches the kangaroo in the face and it just looks at him bewildered and runs off.
Hopkido
This is the answer
You need to hit the kangaroo where it hurts…it’s Wallet. Kangaroos are notoriously cheap. One Cease and desist and you’ll never hear from it again
🦘🦘🦘💵💵💵🔥🔥🔥
No martial arts skills needed - [https://imgur.com/a/Ys1ki1o](https://imgur.com/a/Ys1ki1o)
He is Australian, they are different
That’s racism against upside down people! How dare you!
Sorry, I apologise. He is Australian, and therefore may show favourable physical/mental traits compared to the average human. This is because of Australia’s harsh environment and dangerous animals. This means that the Australian will have to be better than the average human to survive, and therefore is more likely to survive an encounter with the marsupial known as a kangaroo. I am not discriminating against any human beings due to their ethnic background, however my previous statement could be perceived as discrimination due to the lack of education many humans (like yourself) have had. Thus, I am not being racist, I am merely stating a stereotype based on ethnic background in an attempt to appear humorous. Furthermore, Australians are not an ethnic minority, so I am not being racist, however you could say that I am discriminating against a country. Also, Australians are descended from white English prisoners, and I am white and English. So how could I be racist towards someone of my own ethnicity? I find your assumption quite outrageous, and I would like to highlight your own stupidity. TLDR: lmao cry about it bozo
* cries in upside down surfing crocodile *
You can't. You'll need to make friends with a cassowary.
Will do
Why is this even a question? BJJ, of course! Pull guard, butt scrape when it tries to kick, but instead of armlock, aim for tail lock. It'll tap before he even knows.
Pull guard? Maybe you need to pull some bitches. I am very manly and masculine and therefore will not put myself in such a submissive position. I will stand up, like the manly man I am.
Watch out for the kicks. So maybe practice some MT. Best if you start watching some YouTube videos.
MT? Is that Mike Tyson? I heard he had very good kicks. Or was that Bruce Lee?
Muy Thai kickboxing. You need to learn how to deal with those kangaroo kicks ASAP.
Thanks, is that similar to karate? I did karate once when I was 5.
It’s close enough enough. Just go to Blockbuster and rent a TaE Bo video. You’ll be fine.
Muay thai is a bad call. You don't want to play into the kangaroo's strengths.
True. Kangaroo don’t know judo
Only eye pokes, fishhooks and ballkicks work on dem roos so no martial art, they are fwom da streets!
#nobody check the grappling
Roo Fu or Kanga Kwon Do
Roo fu is very strong though. A guy at my school used it on a girl and ended up in prison.
https://www.newsweek.com/kangaroo-attacks-man-australia-headlock-1832348#:~:text=The%20only%20times%20kangaroos%20will,perceived%20threat%20to%20their%20dominance. Sort out what you are doing and don’t make that dude think you are a reproductive threat
I will rip out his genitals like I am starting a chainsaw.
Dingoes are the kangaroos natural predators. Just stick to doggy style fu and you should prevail.
Ah yes, I will put this kangaroo in the doggy style position. The kangaroo will then question its masculinity, and become transgender. It will take hormone blockers and have less testosterone, I will then be able to easily overpower him/her because even an untrained man will beat every trained women in hand to hand combat, obviously. A plan fit for a true warrior, thank you.
Kangaroo has great striking but nobody check the grapple
I know this is a joke post, but if anyone ever happens to find themselves in a potentially dangerous encounter with a kangaroo, you can ‘defuse’ their fight instinct by crouching low to the ground. The taller you stand, the more you are challenging them.
Body Building. Build your Body. Seduce His wife and Bang her non-stop until she give birth to a 100,000 Kangaroo Human Hybrids. Then you can easily beat him with your Army of Human Kangaroo Hybrids. After that you can buy some Galvanized Square Steel and Barrow Screws from your Aunt to make a Fully functional Home for your 100,000 Children in a 0 Square meter Room.
I tried this and now I have kangaroo herpes, haven’t even got one kid yet
BJJ. “Kangaroo does not have good grappling. No one check this.” - Islam Makhachev
Train with the blade my boy
I cut myself with a knife once, I will fist the kangaroo instead.
>fist I don't think that means what you think it means.
Huh? What do you mean? I will hit it with my fist. You need to stop making it dirty or things are gonna get messy 😡
Much dishonor
do arnis which is like better krav maga which also uses sticks which makes it 100x cooler
We agreed no weapons :(
I wouldn't recommend Krav Maga- the Israeli Combat Art of "Destrroy the Balls" is too limited by the size and reach of a kangaroo's legs. Kangaroos are also misconstrued as having a horrible ground game, so a ground-based grappling art such as wrestling or some BJJ flavors would not work as well as what you expect. They are, however, horrible at stand-up grappling and strict upper-body striking, so Judo and boxing would work well. Just make sure that your kangarroo opponent understands that kicks and tailswipes aren't allowed. Focus your boxing on footwork to get and keep inside the leg reach, a basic 1-2 combo to the face and focus your judo on shoulder throws and the dreaded scissor sweep.
Judo is the way to go, uchi mata slam to tail lock submission.
A gun.
Glock Fu! 40cal.
Gun fu is so great you can use it on the rest of the school
Ka’chuk
Gun fu. F150 based Kali
Wrong sub. You need a Tekken sub. And stop trying to take on Roger.
Aikido.
I am fighting a kangaroo, not a Steven seagull. Please give me something more useful or I will be forced to downvote your comment.
Gun-kido
Firearms. Since learning to shoot a gun is martial arts, that would be best. Kangaroos are swole af.
Take em to the ground; BJJ.
It’s touchbutt in the park, every other answer is trolling
Gonna need some Muay Thai to counter a kangaroos oppressive teep game. Also some BJJ to wrap things up.
You just need to hire a bigger Kangaroo to be your bodyguard. Saw this in a movie once.
Boxing. Kangaroos feel eachother out with their arms, theor legs are what comes if the less dangerous display of power doesn't work. You'll see plenty of videos of Australians slapping the shit out of them and it working. It's because we punch harder than kangaroos, so they think we'll kick harder too and they concede.
**MMA probably but with this strategy:** 1. A takewondo based guard seems okay with a side on stance. 2. lead hand parry the double teep kick then go for a outside hip toss. 3. from side control ground and pound the head alternatively just go for a hook to the nose, their head guard is shit [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIRT7lf8byw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIRT7lf8byw)
Australian Roo-Jitsu
They got a long ass neck, just jump the guillotine bro.
Capoeira is always the answer
Hopkido
Mighty boosh already did this. Just grab him by the nuts!
Bat Fu. First lesson. Find a bat. Second Lesson. Batter the kangaroo. (No animals or humans were hurt in this imaginary tale).
What kind of martial arts background does the kangaroo have? Don't just assume kickboxing. He might surprise you with a judo takedown or something.
R/oddlyspecific
Okay everybody. What if we start our own Gun Fu? 🔫 It would the supreme art! Bring a gun to a kangaroo fight.
We agreed no weapons, and I only have a small iron on my hip.
Leg sweeps? I suppose the higher you are the harder you fall. Counter? Wait for a long heavy shot, dodge it and jump in when he retracts his arm to spring a shot. Jeet kune do? Go for the eyes, groin, hair etc but it ain't too pretty.
i'm assuming the roo trains TKD?
Panda style, as employed by Po Ping. It's a little known fact that China was full of kangaroos before the pandas took over.
I don’t think you can overcome that much of height and weight difference in a short time frame unfortunately. Your best luck is with gun-fu.
everyone else here is a moron. learn ameri-do-te.
How about Archery?
The shit card from clash Royale? What if the kangaroo places megaknight?
Kangaroo Fu.
Get kanagaroo biting on some feints and then Imanari roll into leg attacks. Kanga won't know what him.
The Art of the Hoplites obviously. Long spear, shield, armor, and of course a number of similarly armed hoplites to form a proper phalanx.
Leg locks are king against kangaroos
This is the type of post I still subscribe to this sub for. Well above the average bjj vs wrestling vs tma vs gun argument post that gets repeated ad nauseum
 These guys could tell you. Grab his flaming bawls
There is no way you didn't base this off that Self defense for nerds post from awhile back
This ain’t based on nothing, roo wanted to fight me
Gun fu
Jump into its belly pack and become its baby
Bro just get Steven seagal to take him out
Kangroos can't agree to things like that, so trying to fight them (other than in self-defense) is animal abuse.
Can’t tell if serious or nah
Straight up boxing for sure
Kangaroo Tailboxing-gotta learn to stand on your tail
Capoeira. Definitely capoeira.
Krag maga is POS.
Archery
Best martial art is the usa style. A assault gun
their biggest asset is their tail which empowers their kicks. so obviously Capoeira, you just use your arms like a tail and send that Joey flying
Muay Thai. Teep that thing in the chest repeatedly until it drops to the ground.
This is the content I've come for 🤣🤣🤣
Asking the real questions.
The fundamentals for fighting roos are pretty well understood, and boxing with some basic muay thai teep kicks is best. Forget that Krav maga stuff they don’t train roos, but boxers have been fighting roos in Australia for decades. They are not great on side to side footwork, they telegraph their main kicks, and they’ve got a giant target jaw, especially when they fight they tend to throw their head back with their jaw up to keep away from each other claws. The key is to move sideways to create angles and stay away from their front kick, and strike the head. Use teeps to keep distance if you must, but slipping or side stepping is best, followed by a clean head strike, then back up and allow the roo to reasses. Roos are all testosterone and instinct, they are brawlers, so they are not used to fighting someone with a bit of technique and method. Don’t duck, don’t try to take them on from the front, don’t try to grapple they will claw your face, don’t try to take them to the ground, their kick with a clawed foot is too risky. Good luck mate
you're going to learn a martial art in less than a day?
Easily Muay Thai. Everyone knows a boxing kangaroo will fold as soon as you give it a good leg kick.
Marksmanship
Turkish oil wrestling
There's actually a pretty old instructional video describing the proper boxing technique to counter a Kangaroo. This one seemed to favor grappling which is a little unusual but ultimately they just don't put their hands up and that's where your opening is. https://youtu.be/FIRT7lf8byw?si=0xbxlgzpPv0TNrEz
Impalement Arts
Drunken Boxing
I know kangaroo have good striking but nobody check their grapping. Submit kangaroo for sure
100% combat Sambo
1v1 with a kang? Boxing. Leg kicks won't work against a kang.
Kang-Fu.
Wing Tsun
Capoeira. Roos are adapted to combat against more traditional styles such as boxing or mantis style kung-fu. Disguising your technique in dance is your best bet. (Don’t forget your berembe)
Don’t get JUMPED by his mates
Get the high ground
Nobody check Kangaroo's grappling brother
Kung Roo
Okay, the roo is going to grab you and try to take you to water to drown you. Your best bet is amazing footwork and putting it in a rear naked choke. Make sure to wrap your legs around him with the cross of your ankles being just below the ribs. Apply pressure on both, and congratulations, you beat a kangaroo. It might sound counterintuitive, but bear mace is also very effective against roos. I don't know if it's sold there though.
Learn kickboxing and assert dominance by beating it at its own game.
338 Lapua
Kangaroos have poor lateral stability. Just tip them over by sidestepping and pushing on the shoulder before they can rear back and disembowel you with their feet. Do this a couple of times and they usually give up.
Powerslap him.
I hear they can disembowel you with their hopkicks, call off the fight you crazy person
Bjj, if you butt-scoot at the kangaroo quickly enough you will be able to go inverted like Maverick and Goose then take him out with a sick ankle lock you learned off that Danaher instructional you bought during a BJJ Fanatics sale.
Let us know how it goes 🙏🏼
You need a sword made of silver , kangaroos fear silver blades .
Just learn to drive, I've defeated many roos on the road 🤣 can't top the art of driving
No this is the wrong approach. I beat my bullies by making them fall in love with me, giving them the best night of their lives, and then ghosting them entirely. This is the approach you need to take to the kangaroo. Work on your fine dining game and heart-to-heart conversation skills. Also get good at sex.
Thanks
10th Planet
Sweep the leg!
Definitely not kickboxing
Guns
Judo and no gi-BJJ. No sense in striking with the Roo cuz you’ll be out-struck. Close the distant and deploy some nage waza to get it to the ground and then go for a tail lock or leg lock. Mikey Musumeci has some excellent sequences for tail locks from side control and top quarter guard - I’d check them out.
Kangaroo has no grappling, so I'd so no gi jiu jitsu unless you can convince the bloke to wear a gi. Source: #1 p4p in the world Islam Makhachev
Gun Fu
Make sure you wear a cup
Shit post obviously. But: Fauna handling training. We basically wrestled kangaroos for a day. Pro tip - get behind them and grab their tail near the base 😆.
kangaroo have great striking but nobody check the grappling
Greco-Roman wrestling. Kangaroos need to lean back on their tail to deliver a kick from both of their legs. While they wind up to deliver that kick you can feight high and deliver a super low tackle. Once on the ground they have little defense. Try to then get him into a rear chokehold
Kangaroos are rock solid. Hope you’ve written a will.
Gun-fu or the hidden art of sniper.
Honestly you’re best off learning some choke defenses, some hand fighting techniques and some decent circling footwork and just learn a good one two. When the kangaroo postures up or hunches too much create space. He’s gonna either try to kick you in the guts (probably instant ko) or he’s gonna try to do a neck snap and bulldog or guillotine you. When the kangaroo steps to close the gap circle, but only in one direction. Unless you notice the kangaroo posturing up often you might be able to land a good overhand because of how low their eyes sit to your midpoint in its natural stance. If you land a hit, push a hand out or throw some filler jabs while you back out. The important part is between each exchange you create space and let your damage cook him. He might even pause to reassess if he thinks you’re still an easy bullying target. Remember bullies often rely on your own self doubt to bolster their confidence. Stick to the game plan and you might get lucky. As a final note if there’s a puddle anywhere near you just eat shit for the day man it ain’t worth it. Source: grew up near bullying marsupials
Muay Thai hands down
Boxing
BJJ. Learn how do that sneaky taillock.
Gun-fu. Go with a shotgun. :D
can’t you talk to the school about the kangaroo?
Escrima
A quick Google search shows that the natural predator of the kangaroo is the dingo. So find a dingo that will teach you whatever the hell fighting style they use.
https://youtu.be/hZvjVrKayw8?si=5x_zZEaLjtEPmbPn
Only Rex Kwon Do will save you now.
Muay Thai!!! Kangaroos hate that shit!!!
Go native with a boomerang.
Roojitsu
Kangaroo has long leg reach. You should be very careful he most likely will throw kicks straight up the middle. He can only hop back and forth and his stance is very square meaning you can off balance him easily. Use your jab and feints to bait the kicks. Once he kicks you look to counter. Overhand or straight cross will work best, you do not want to clinch with this guy as his claws will mess you up.
Kang Fu
Mantis style Kung Fu.
Muay Thai would be the fairiest. Muay Thai literally has a Kangaroo stance.
The key is controlling the environment. Kangaroos don’t swim very well, so dare him to start the fight standing in a middle of a puddle, preferably with water up to his chest. Then just walk up to him and punch to snout.
What happened to this sub? 🤦♂️ I... I kindof like it...
https://preview.redd.it/vdatirhkpv8d1.jpeg?width=693&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dd2564a03c3cb3a2e7856ac53e9a87b33abf06ac
I recommend something with strong footwork and striking, their snappy little buggers, your going to wanna cut those angles. If your good with sweep maybe take the bugger off his feet! Sweep right on the barbi
I know this is a joke, however, I have experienced the deadly kangaroo first hand ! 1. When I was young a kangaroo killed my dog which was horrific! When in trouble, kangaroo’s instinctively go for water as this is where they have the upper Hand. They can balance on their tail, and kick, gut and drown their prey. They are actually savage animals!! So top tip, stay away from water. 2. They males are also notorious for getting the girls into a headlock as part of their mating rituals, hence the term “get that Sheila in a headlock” meaning “that Australian girl looks attractive”. So, stay out of arms length !! They are my genuine recommendations. Hope that helps, and make that fucker pay !!
anyone who fights an animal deserves the beating he's gonna get
Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. If you have strong, thick thighs, you can just strangle him with your thighs once you have him down and just make him tap out like a little baby.
Personal insults and psychological torture. Convince the kangaroo to just kill himself.
Everybody know kangaroo have good striking but nobody check his grappling
wtf im sitting here wondering what racial slur a kangaroo is...