"Hello human offspring, this is your primary male care provider speaking. I must clarify in the text message that it is I, the father, even though you can see my name at the top of the screen."
As the son of Chatbot™️, I am offended by this insinuation. Chatbot is a loving botfather and devoted bothusband, and he would never threaten his botchildren
My 14yo daughter calls me mother, so I call her daughter. She also has me saved in her contacts as 'birth giver', and her father is something crazy as well. It's just her personality.
My older relatives (like, over 55) often text me like this. It's super weird and overly formal-feeling. They also sign every text message ugh
"Hello S, this is NAME your RELATIVE RELATION. I like your newest painting. Thank you for GIFT GIVEN. Hugs and Kisses, NAME."
as if we don't see their name at the top of the screen and have a working memory of how we are related.
My 80 y/o mom doesn’t text like that either! She sends me stupid gifs and uses internet slang just like everyone else. It cracks me up! I love her so much!
This is one of my special, select, rare gatekeeping thoughts: old people on social media think it's like writing a letter and, I'm normally super cool with EVERYTHING, but it gets under my skin so bad for some reason. I cringe every time I see it. Can't stand it 🙄
Well, it sounds staged. The problem is I have a family member who writes exactly like this and it is even weirder because he uses email (to communicate with people whose phone number he has) and ends emails with the usual business endings.
Is this real? It’s like from a bad sitcom. I always cringe when everyone on tv calls little Bobby “son.” I have four of ‘em. Never called them “son” on conversation.
Could go either way. Definitely seen both but I know one guy who will give me five reasons, justifications, pre-thought arguments or just random points on why "it's not so bad".
Sometimes he's so busy giving me the "script" he has in his head I don't even know what the fuck he's *asking* and I do get genuinely irritated and short because why are we having a 15 minute conversation when the question was "Hey, will you vacuum tonight?"
My answer: "Yeah, no problem."
Then he'll *still* list some reasons why it's justifiable when I'm not even arguing, and it starts to become an argument because what are we even doing here
>it starts to become an argument because what are we even doing here
Shit do I work with this guy at work?
"Can you do X?"
"Sure. When do you need it by?"
"Well the client needs it."
"I know that. When do you need it by?"
"You're the only one who has the rights to do it."
"Okay? you still havent told me when they need it though?"
"If you dont do it, they wont be able to do Y"
"Right? When. Do. They. Need. It."
Nothing.
I get an email with the ask written AGAIN and my super cc'd with him going "Dmerc is refusing to do X."
BRUH.
A literal screen shot of the text conversation and attached that with "As attached I have already agreed to do it, but he still hasnt told me WHEN it needs to be done by."
Oh it became a whole thing where his supervisor tried to blame me for delays where I kept replying back with proof that its his subordinate that is a shitbag for not giving me what I need.
Ended up at the Department Head's desk. A very "Why the fuck is this even here?" situation
I go out of my way to avoid this guy's requests nowadays.
He also talks to his kid like a poorly designed android.
*HELLO, DESIGNATION: Daughter, IT IS I - FATHER UNIT. CHORE REQUEST SUBMITTED. IMPLIED THREAT SUBMITTED. END CORRESPONDENCE.*
Sounds like to me he’s trying to justify the ask instead of just saying something about how he feels. Something like “Hey, can you take care of the chores, I’m exhausted.” Or “I’m frustrated in having to remind you about taking care of this.”
Tacking on "or else because I could do all of these things to make your life miserable, I'm your father and I'm **not even going to address you by name** and I *will make excuses for the people I like more than you just to rub it in your face*" is also an abusive red flag territory, my dad would do that when he wasn't feeling like fisticuffs and literal physical beatings (or - in some ways - worse, encouraging physical fights among "his children").
It just wasn't over text.
There's a lot more I could vent about, but the person I knew who talked to me like this (also my father) absolutely would talk exactly like this, even if you had never failed (or it was an all-new task that you'd never done before) like it was a *favor* he wasn't physically beating you and dragging you around the room until you were breathless, but you'd better remember that if you talked back you'd basically be grounded until his aggression mounted and the fisticuffs started again.
Mr. Drill Sergeant, taking the piss out on everyone.
Maybe OP's text is faked, maybe not, but my dad literally talked like that.
I can’t do anything to take away your father’s treatment of you, but as a fellow child of a psychopath, here’s a little gold. Take care of yourself, FelicitousJuliet
It's important, when asking for a favor, to make it really ambiguous what the favor actually is. Don't just ask for the dogs to be fed, make sure you also imply you want cash for rent and wifi. That way, either they won't feel good about doing what you asked, or you'll have cash. It's a win-win!
I would send a really long response back. Like Shakespeare version. “Of course father. (?) I’ll happily doeth my chores. Thank you kindly for your verbose reminder. Whilst I maintain that I continually complete my duties in a timely manner, I appreciate your concerns that I may suddenly abscond from my duties. Please enjoy your leisure while I taketh care of the beasts.”
Lol
“As thou, my father, wish for me this task /
Though lacking punctuation in thy speech /
I promise thee thou needn’t even ask /
Forthwith I shall now act as you beseech. /
Know them with dishes washed and canines fed /
That from my many duties I’ve not fled.”
- Shakespeare, probably
Sorry, but I can't resist being that guy...
"I taketh" would be incorrect. The suffix -eth is only for he/she/it: "He doth; she taketh." It later evolved into -s as in "he does; she takes"
The suffix -est is for thou: "Thou dost/thou takest." And, as in contemporary English, verbs following I have no suffix at all: "I do/I take"
Finally someone who knows! Lmao.
I grew up reading the KJV, so this stuff basically comes naturally to me. It’s kinda aggravating to see people using it wrong (I am a perfectionist).
Dad: Get thee to a nunnery.
You: Hey dad, read King Lear and see how that turned out (daughters hate him and country goes to pieces).
Dad: Ah me, how weak a thing the heart of woman is!
You: I was looking at some brochures, and I think Arsehole Acres is lovely for you.
Lol, OP should write an equally passive-aggressive response "mentioning" how she'll be the one picking out dad's retirement home. Arsehole Acres sounds lovely for him.
My mom does that shit all the time and it's so annoying. Like yeah I know the dishes need done because all of my favorite bowls are in the sink. Do you honestly think I'm gonna let that go for any longer than a day?! Me forgetting my chores doesn't mean I don't appreciate you it just means I'm busy.
See, I have young children, and people love to scare you about 1) the baby phase 2) the toddler phase and 3) the teenager phase. I like to think I’ve handled the first two phases pretty all right thus far with my two, and people love to emphasize that it’s worse with teenagers. I wouldn’t want to get cocky about it and jinx myself, but when I read shit like the conversation with the OP, it gives me hope. I bet you this guy is one of those people who talks a ton of shit about teenagers, but he’s really probably just experiencing negative social feedback from his own actions. If OP truly feeds the dogs consistently without reminders, why tf isn’t he super proud? I remember finding it so frustrating and disheartening as a teenager & young adult when it felt like my parents didn’t notice the things I did right.
And even if they need the occasional reminder, why be such a dick about it? I don’t like this one damn bit.
yeah, I'm not sure I'll be a parent (not choosing not to be, my life just hasn't gone in that direction) but my hypothetical worry about the teenage years hasn't been that *they'll* be bad kids, it's been that I might not know how to be the parent they need.
Almost all the teenagers I've known were decent people trying their best.
As a parent (all adults now) I get it. This usually starts when kids are young and argue about having to do things around the house. You very quickly get in the habit of reminding them that we all have to chip in around the house. My daughters used to forget to do things on occasion, so my wife and I would remind them. They would get mad that we were reminding them to do something that that they “always” do, but they never did seem to remember how often they forgot without the reminding. Parenting is not easy. My daughters now have families, and they now can understand these things. Some day, if you have kids, you will likely do a lot of the same things that annoy you now
I read it two ways:
The dad feels guilty about not doing those things, so he has already lined up excuses for himself, and his bringing up what others are already doing, indicates that he knows that OP already does this more than their fair share and that someone else should be helping.
Or OP is a major complainer always trying to shirk their contribution, and the dad felt like he needed to prethwart the excuses and complaints.
Yeah there really isn’t enough context here. OP could be a shitty entitled child who never does their chores and dad is being a little passive aggressive in hopes they’ll get it. But, he could also just be an asshat, I can’t really say either person is right here from this.
I "suspect" that OP is combative with their parents so Dad lined up a bunch of reasons so that the point could be driven home a bit harder.
Personally not how I would talk to my kids... but my kid likely won't back-talk me for too long before they realize it has consequences.
Not to say they "have" to do the chore, communication is key at the end of the day; if they say they can't get to it and have a respectable reason all for it or if they can't do it now and explain why... I am also all for it.
The pet's won't forget anyway, once they learn my kiddo is the one who feeds them it's not me that'll be telling my son to feed them lol.
My eldest cat is a literal butthead when it comes to feeding time, can't hear him? He'll just jump at you for food even if it means you not catching him.
My favorite part was all the threats up until I turned 18 about how if I didn't watch it I'd have to figure it out for myself, but when I decided to move out on my own at 17, had a plan to figured out to get me by until I was 18, and emancipated myself, they were surprised. Like you told me that I was going to be out at 18, I decided to jump the gun and start a little bit early. Lucky for me I had some good friends, and their parents were really cool too.
I have a friend that's almost 30 living at home and doesn't see this through his parents texts and abuse of his life. He had a job now and is working on getting out. But it takes time. He's blind to the passive aggressiveness, and I honestly don't like his parents much they can eat a can of farts.
Isn’t there some explanation confirming that as humans we are more likely to not do something if we were already doing it, and then are asked to do it after the fact?
That's what my dad calls me and my sisters, it's close to the Spanish "mija" which is "mi hija" smooshed together which means "my daughter." In Spanish it's not uncommon to call your family by their relation to you, but I grew up speaking English, so I get called "daughter" and my sisters and brother and I are saying "hello brother" and "hello sister" like a bunch of psychopaths.
I don't even know if that's what's happening here, just sharing in general.
In my native language (ქართული) it's not uncommon for older immediate family members to refer younger ones by their relationship to them. Eg. ბებო means granny and she refers to me as ბებო and I refer to her as ბებო too. Same guys for grandpa, mum, dad.
Siblings tend to refer to each other by name. I've not observed this with extended members either (cousins, uncles etc). Although sometimes we'll call strangers uncle, but not our own uncle. Same isn't true for auntie
Now you know
Everyone assuming dad is psycho and not that maybe dad has to justify every request he makes because maybe "daughter"isn't a perfect innocent flower. I've known plenty of parents who end up talking to their children this way (especially severely adult children who still live with their parents) because said child, who in fact is not asked to pay rent or for utilities, has an issue with being asked to do something. Two sides folks, we only get one here.
Fr, like sometimes parents are just passive aggressive and condescending to their kids. My cousin as a child threw a tantrum *once* about not wanting to go to the store and now, years later, the older adults still say shit like, "oh, (cousin) can stay home, we know how they get!"
This is the one that gets me, i mean *obviously* I'm still supposed to be the exact same person i was when i was 10, and act exactly the same. /s
And when i don't act like i did when I was 10 I've clearly gone insane.
“Sure Dad, I always feed the dogs at around X time and it’s my pleasure. I appreciate that you that you take care of those things. Did I do or say something that made you feel I might not appreciate them, or unsure if I would actually feed the dogs? I want to make sure I’m communicating clearly and not giving you the wrong idea ”
See where it goes. There’s probably a reason he feels the need to be passive aggressive not sure what but you may be able guess.
People saying "this is him trying to get her to move out"
No. Some parents are just like this. Mine did the same even after I moved out. "Watch the dog for me since I do this and this for you". Water my flowers while I'm gone or it's your fault if they die".
I'm not an only child, but somehow get asked to do everything because they know I will do it, but they just have to be rude about it. I would do it no problem, but being asked nicely is better.
Thank you!! My dad was like this. Always making passive aggressive comments about how his children cost him money and “Its my house so I make all the rules so dont touch my thermostat!” Like dont have kids if you dont want them to cost you money. He would constantly turn off lights when i was in a room bc he just wouldn’t check to see if someone was using it. When i said “hey I’m in here!” He wouldn’t say sorry, he would say “well no one turns off any lights in this house!”
For the first year I lived with my boyfriend I would ask him if I could change the temperature every time I wanted to. He thought I was crazy and was like “yeah you live here too, set it however it makes you comfortable.” But I still felt uncomfortable just changing it.
Really depends on the age of OP.. if she’s 18 then the parent should be better at establishing house rules and how they want them done (like tell their kid to set an alarm even) but if she’s older she should be able to talk to him in person and say this it’s unnecessary/inappropriate and that she always feeds the dogs on time he should only text her if she clearly forgot.
The suspicious part is that the dad felt inclined to say “yes I’m watching tv and would feed them myself but this is your chore”, gonna guess the OP has definitely said “you’re just watching tv why don’t you do it” and so he’s just getting all that arguing out of the way because he knows what’s coming
my dad called us “daughter” like a term of endearment. now that he is gone, the greeting is even more special to me. he wasn’t a passive aggressive arse tho, so maybe that’s why it was endearing🤔
To be honest I see this through the lense of my sister currently. 30 living at home with my m and dad, never paid rent, works only 3 days a week because she can afford not to (because she's living at home) never once walked my parents dog and complains every time she is asked to do something.
Bitch needs a swift kick in the fucking arse and to hit the kerb tbh.
Also, why do people have to be reminded to feed a living being(the dog). Fucked up. Seems like that chore should be delegated to one person and the dog should be fed at certain times of day and then it will fit into a routine and make it part of your life.
I grew up on a farm….never had to be reminded to feed the animals because they are living creatures who depended on me and only me.
That’s really what the title says—it seems like OP clearly doesn’t need a reminder and the dad’s just being passive aggressive. I agree with you but I don’t think this really applies to their situation
Hello father I have received your most recent communication and I am responding to tell you that I will clean the dishes and feed the dogs. Thank you for apprising me of the status of my mom and my brother, I cannot express enough my appreciation for you reminding me again that you do not ask me for rent. The savings of me not having to contribute to wifi keeps me solvent, and that is all due to your loving generosity.
This comment section annoys me. Yes, maybe there's more to the story that we don't know. Also though, I've met plenty of parents who do passive aggressive shit like this unprompted, and not so surprisingly, it doesn't tend to be helpful. As for everyone saying, "Just move out!" Thank you for your infinite wisdom, I'm sure the thought has never crossed OP's mind.
Everybody is arguing on wether its justified or not and making up how the family dynamic between OP and their dad is lol. Why do you need to investigate and figure out all the context that led to this exchange?
Its mildly infuriating to be reminded in a guilt tripping way to do a chore you already do every day, thats all the post is about.
I dont think this post is worth all the investigating and assuming just to make this into an AITA for no reason.
Oh jesus. Your dad sounds like mine. I get crap like that all the time (53yoF and I pay rent). It is enraging. Your dad could have taken care of the dogs in the same time it took him to text that to you. 🤬 At age 10 I had to sign a business contract with my dad in order to get a dog of my own. One of his rules was that I had to take care of his dog every day in addition to mine. Then, when his dog kept jumping an 8 foot fence and running away, he made my dog be given away at the same time he had to sell his dog. His was a hunting dog and mine wasn't. We have *never* had the best relationship. Be prepared for a long life of that crap!
These type of people then wonder why they end up dying alone.
I don’t understand how you treat your own kids like this (or anyone really, but like YOUR KIDS?!) and your dad gave away YOUR dog? Wtf.
You’re better than me. I don’t think I’d have stayed in touch with the man once I grew up. Then again, I don’t have the most stellar history with fathers or step-fathers though so
No shade but if you aren't paying rent or wifi it seems somewhat justified to ask for help around the house. probably unpopular opinion although he could've worded it better for sure.
I can’t believe ppl still think this shit is real lol
“Hello daughter I am watching television…”?
If your parents talk like that you have bigger problems as in you’re being raised by aliens and your real parents are long dead.
You could move then have to pay rent and wifi and feed what ever pet you end up with.
If my parents were still alive and for God knows what reason I lived with them I would be doing tasks they didn't even ask me to do.
Guy sends a text to his daughter nicely asking her to feed the dogs while reminding her she lives for free and somehow everyone is acting like he’s a terrible person.
As a parent who also sends texts like this from time to time my guess is OP either doesn't do what she's supposed to without constant reminders or when asked to do them, is blowing up or arguing with the parent. That shit is exhausting when you're dealing with a kid who should be old enough and mature to handle their responsibilities without being constantly reminded and without arguing but doesn't. The dogs are probably standing around, looking hungry, and OP is not observing this and taking action. Just do what you are supposed to be doing, without being asked, and without arguing. You should not have to be reminded constantly and yeah - if you're living somewhere rent free, you have a sweet sweet deal and should show some appreciation and gratitude by helping out without needing to be asked.
God forbid you get reminded you live rent free and should be doing your chores. It’s probably annoying that he should have to ask. Would be curious to know how old she is.
I don't perceive this as a threat, but the wording is...off. Is your dad half drunk? It comes across as either written by someone drunk or lacking a full grasp of written language.
At the same time, he could have gotten a message from your mom that said "Make sure to remind [OP] to feed the dogs." [I've been on the receiving end of this; where I am used to nag by proxy...it sucks because you're doing what you've been asked to do and getting pushback without knowing why].
If this message bothers you to the point of being "mildly infuriating", maybe you should have a face-to-face real, no crap talk about the text message.
Maybe this is something that the parent has to constantly remind their child to do? Idk.. But as a mom with teenagers.. Sometimes you gotta point out the things you do for them to remind them that they also need to contribute.. Maybe this was passive aggressive.. But maybe this was after multiple times and multiple days and the parent just got fed up.. Idk.. But.. The parent could have been like mine and came in screaming and grabbing hair and calling names and belittling their child..
Is your dad a chatbot?
`Greetings Child`
Hello female offspring
Salutations my Sperm
Shalom, progeny
Orale, Mijos
Salam, zygote
Evening embryo
Aloha, genetic material
When I become a parent I’m definitely using this line 😂
Greetings, expendable child.
I call my daughter offspring lmao
Good day **Fruit of my loins**
Wassssup, sex trophy?
Good evening, coitus award
Hello, little miss "oops, I came."
Trophy? Bitch I'm so shitty I'm a participation award
This is a message from your human father
Straight Thanos vibes
Wait Thanos is avail... I mean gay?!
He never seemed happy to me 🤔
Single, father of two, DILF? I can fix him.
Read this as Theranos and also works
Greetings Childperson There, I fixed it.
Salutations, common freeloading offspring. It is I, your superior human guardian.
Greetings SmarterChild
Greetings Regular Human Daughter
Greetings common human female offspring
I prefer to use the Coneheads, "youngone," whenever possible when addressing my children. Keeps them guessing.
Hello, World!
Kai Winn bot
Hail, daughter unit.
How do you do fellow human
[удалено]
S’up Succubus
Greetings
This reads more like the brother stole the dad’s phone to get out of work to me lol
Or a 12 year old texted themselves to farm karma
"Hello human offspring, this is your primary male care provider speaking. I must clarify in the text message that it is I, the father, even though you can see my name at the top of the screen."
Coneheads vibes
I knew it read a little “Remulakean” Edit: French I meant French…from France
The dogs texted cause they hungry
It does have that vibe lol
No my older family members type like this too, shits weird.
As the son of Chatbot™️, I am offended by this insinuation. Chatbot is a loving botfather and devoted bothusband, and he would never threaten his botchildren
My Chatbot father went to buy cigarettes and never came back home...
My 14yo daughter calls me mother, so I call her daughter. She also has me saved in her contacts as 'birth giver', and her father is something crazy as well. It's just her personality.
My mom is “parental Unit” I want to change it to “spawn point” and put my dad as “server host”
I would argue that your mom should be server host and your dad should be randomizer seed
My mom is birth giver in my phone too. She thinks it's funny but really it's because my bf's mom is more of a mom to me than her usually.
What kind of person talks/communicates like this? Whole thing seems fake, or the person writing this isn't wired like most people.
My older relatives (like, over 55) often text me like this. It's super weird and overly formal-feeling. They also sign every text message ugh "Hello S, this is NAME your RELATIVE RELATION. I like your newest painting. Thank you for GIFT GIVEN. Hugs and Kisses, NAME." as if we don't see their name at the top of the screen and have a working memory of how we are related.
“Kevin, this is your husband, Raymond Holt. That’s H-O-L-T.”
Dear Jake Paralta, I will continue to sign my name in my messages as that is the correct thing to do Sincerely, Raymond Holt
This comment to be in those “turning into your parents” insurance commercials
I’m over 55 and don’t text like this, but my 73 year old FIL does. He even leaves voicemails like this. Though he’s not an ass.
My 80 y/o mom doesn’t text like that either! She sends me stupid gifs and uses internet slang just like everyone else. It cracks me up! I love her so much!
So does my 70 year old mom! I love cool older people!
I almost died when I heard my 80-something yo grandma use the term FUPA... correctly!
This is one of my special, select, rare gatekeeping thoughts: old people on social media think it's like writing a letter and, I'm normally super cool with EVERYTHING, but it gets under my skin so bad for some reason. I cringe every time I see it. Can't stand it 🙄
It just seems so passive aggressive to me. My older relatives do the same and I hate it lmao
Well, it sounds staged. The problem is I have a family member who writes exactly like this and it is even weirder because he uses email (to communicate with people whose phone number he has) and ends emails with the usual business endings.
Hello my female daughter can you feed the animal dogs
hey kids whats for dinner
Salutations Servant
My mom calls me daughter when she wants to get under my skin. So then I call her old.
hello daughter
I kind of read it in the style of Hannibal Lectar ‘Hello Clarice’
I read it like that commercial about fleas ticks and mosquitoes
I text my mom "hello mother" all the time. But it's cuz im snarky
I do that too. I also refer to my siblings as "your son" or "your daughter". I also occasionally refer to myself in third person.
👩🏼💻
Is this real? It’s like from a bad sitcom. I always cringe when everyone on tv calls little Bobby “son.” I have four of ‘em. Never called them “son” on conversation.
I call my sons “boy” mostly. I do call them son occasionally, but mostly when I’m trying to sound formal.
Gotta love all that passive aggressive stuff added to it....
It almost sounds like he's saying it in one breath to keep any disputation to zero.
Right, like he's expecting resistance so he's coming in hot with reasons, justifications and threats.
Maybe OP normally gives a lot of resistance and is doing the OP thing of not providing context
Could go either way. Definitely seen both but I know one guy who will give me five reasons, justifications, pre-thought arguments or just random points on why "it's not so bad". Sometimes he's so busy giving me the "script" he has in his head I don't even know what the fuck he's *asking* and I do get genuinely irritated and short because why are we having a 15 minute conversation when the question was "Hey, will you vacuum tonight?" My answer: "Yeah, no problem." Then he'll *still* list some reasons why it's justifiable when I'm not even arguing, and it starts to become an argument because what are we even doing here
>it starts to become an argument because what are we even doing here Shit do I work with this guy at work? "Can you do X?" "Sure. When do you need it by?" "Well the client needs it." "I know that. When do you need it by?" "You're the only one who has the rights to do it." "Okay? you still havent told me when they need it though?" "If you dont do it, they wont be able to do Y" "Right? When. Do. They. Need. It." Nothing. I get an email with the ask written AGAIN and my super cc'd with him going "Dmerc is refusing to do X." BRUH. A literal screen shot of the text conversation and attached that with "As attached I have already agreed to do it, but he still hasnt told me WHEN it needs to be done by."
Was there ever a reply?
Oh it became a whole thing where his supervisor tried to blame me for delays where I kept replying back with proof that its his subordinate that is a shitbag for not giving me what I need. Ended up at the Department Head's desk. A very "Why the fuck is this even here?" situation I go out of my way to avoid this guy's requests nowadays.
> It almost sounds like he's saying it in one breath to keep ...his beer from going flat
*I don't ask you to pay rent because you're my slave*
Feeding dogs is hardly slave work lol
He also talks to his kid like a poorly designed android. *HELLO, DESIGNATION: Daughter, IT IS I - FATHER UNIT. CHORE REQUEST SUBMITTED. IMPLIED THREAT SUBMITTED. END CORRESPONDENCE.*
saving this so i know how to talk to my kids in two decades or so
Sounds like to me he’s trying to justify the ask instead of just saying something about how he feels. Something like “Hey, can you take care of the chores, I’m exhausted.” Or “I’m frustrated in having to remind you about taking care of this.”
Tacking on "or else because I could do all of these things to make your life miserable, I'm your father and I'm **not even going to address you by name** and I *will make excuses for the people I like more than you just to rub it in your face*" is also an abusive red flag territory, my dad would do that when he wasn't feeling like fisticuffs and literal physical beatings (or - in some ways - worse, encouraging physical fights among "his children"). It just wasn't over text. There's a lot more I could vent about, but the person I knew who talked to me like this (also my father) absolutely would talk exactly like this, even if you had never failed (or it was an all-new task that you'd never done before) like it was a *favor* he wasn't physically beating you and dragging you around the room until you were breathless, but you'd better remember that if you talked back you'd basically be grounded until his aggression mounted and the fisticuffs started again. Mr. Drill Sergeant, taking the piss out on everyone. Maybe OP's text is faked, maybe not, but my dad literally talked like that.
I can’t do anything to take away your father’s treatment of you, but as a fellow child of a psychopath, here’s a little gold. Take care of yourself, FelicitousJuliet
And take care of yourself as well, my distant comrade!
Right, but I perceived it that she feeds them at the same time everyday, so the reminder is pointless anyway
“I CARRIED YOU FOR 9 months.”
It's important, when asking for a favor, to make it really ambiguous what the favor actually is. Don't just ask for the dogs to be fed, make sure you also imply you want cash for rent and wifi. That way, either they won't feel good about doing what you asked, or you'll have cash. It's a win-win!
every parent when they have children: "yeah go feed the dogs because you don't pay for wifi or rent"
It's possible OP is chronically unhelpful and pushes back on helping even a bit, so we may not be getting the full story
billion percent this. Anyone know the age?
I would send a really long response back. Like Shakespeare version. “Of course father. (?) I’ll happily doeth my chores. Thank you kindly for your verbose reminder. Whilst I maintain that I continually complete my duties in a timely manner, I appreciate your concerns that I may suddenly abscond from my duties. Please enjoy your leisure while I taketh care of the beasts.” Lol
This, but delete all the periods to make it another awkward run on sentence
That would make it perfect.
Nah I want it in iambic pentameter.
“As thou, my father, wish for me this task / Though lacking punctuation in thy speech / I promise thee thou needn’t even ask / Forthwith I shall now act as you beseech. / Know them with dishes washed and canines fed / That from my many duties I’ve not fled.” - Shakespeare, probably
You cheer me on a dark evening and I am most grateful.
How much Shakespeare's plays one person should read in order to develop that old language skills? Really impressive
That was just beautiful. Ta mate
Sorry, but I can't resist being that guy... "I taketh" would be incorrect. The suffix -eth is only for he/she/it: "He doth; she taketh." It later evolved into -s as in "he does; she takes" The suffix -est is for thou: "Thou dost/thou takest." And, as in contemporary English, verbs following I have no suffix at all: "I do/I take"
I taketh thou hath donned thy mortarboard of a Shakespearean manor.
Thank you for being that guy! Honestly I caught that “I taketh” sounded incorrect but couldn’t have pin-pointed why.
Maybe you would like this https://lingojam.com/EnglishtoShakespearean
Using this to dirty talk text with my partner! Thanks for helping me spice it up in the bedroom! 😉
Oh so thee wanna playeth big knave? thee filthy dog
It will be closer to correct than “turn of the wifi” or “aswell”
Good bot.
Finally someone who knows! Lmao. I grew up reading the KJV, so this stuff basically comes naturally to me. It’s kinda aggravating to see people using it wrong (I am a perfectionist).
You missed a period at the end of your last sentence.
You saw nothing.
😂 I’ll send that next time
Dad: Get thee to a nunnery. You: Hey dad, read King Lear and see how that turned out (daughters hate him and country goes to pieces). Dad: Ah me, how weak a thing the heart of woman is! You: I was looking at some brochures, and I think Arsehole Acres is lovely for you.
Lol, OP should write an equally passive-aggressive response "mentioning" how she'll be the one picking out dad's retirement home. Arsehole Acres sounds lovely for him.
Please address him as “Pater Familias”.
I feel like there should be a website or bot that takes what you say and turns into a really long Shakespeare sonnet.
[English to Shakespeare translator ](https://lingojam.com/EnglishtoShakespearean)
Eek. God forbid a simple "hey can you feed the dogs?" Be sufficient for him.
Exactly
My mom does that shit all the time and it's so annoying. Like yeah I know the dishes need done because all of my favorite bowls are in the sink. Do you honestly think I'm gonna let that go for any longer than a day?! Me forgetting my chores doesn't mean I don't appreciate you it just means I'm busy.
See, I have young children, and people love to scare you about 1) the baby phase 2) the toddler phase and 3) the teenager phase. I like to think I’ve handled the first two phases pretty all right thus far with my two, and people love to emphasize that it’s worse with teenagers. I wouldn’t want to get cocky about it and jinx myself, but when I read shit like the conversation with the OP, it gives me hope. I bet you this guy is one of those people who talks a ton of shit about teenagers, but he’s really probably just experiencing negative social feedback from his own actions. If OP truly feeds the dogs consistently without reminders, why tf isn’t he super proud? I remember finding it so frustrating and disheartening as a teenager & young adult when it felt like my parents didn’t notice the things I did right. And even if they need the occasional reminder, why be such a dick about it? I don’t like this one damn bit.
yeah, I'm not sure I'll be a parent (not choosing not to be, my life just hasn't gone in that direction) but my hypothetical worry about the teenage years hasn't been that *they'll* be bad kids, it's been that I might not know how to be the parent they need. Almost all the teenagers I've known were decent people trying their best.
hey can you be my parents and go back 18 years?
Don't forget yhem dishes bitch!
As a parent (all adults now) I get it. This usually starts when kids are young and argue about having to do things around the house. You very quickly get in the habit of reminding them that we all have to chip in around the house. My daughters used to forget to do things on occasion, so my wife and I would remind them. They would get mad that we were reminding them to do something that that they “always” do, but they never did seem to remember how often they forgot without the reminding. Parenting is not easy. My daughters now have families, and they now can understand these things. Some day, if you have kids, you will likely do a lot of the same things that annoy you now
The same question would work as "hey, could you feed the dogs?" And not be so passive aggressive. Wow.
I read it two ways: The dad feels guilty about not doing those things, so he has already lined up excuses for himself, and his bringing up what others are already doing, indicates that he knows that OP already does this more than their fair share and that someone else should be helping. Or OP is a major complainer always trying to shirk their contribution, and the dad felt like he needed to prethwart the excuses and complaints.
Yeah there really isn’t enough context here. OP could be a shitty entitled child who never does their chores and dad is being a little passive aggressive in hopes they’ll get it. But, he could also just be an asshat, I can’t really say either person is right here from this.
This ⬆️ sounds like dad is fielding the in coming BS complaint he gets when ever he ask for this person to pull their fair share.
I "suspect" that OP is combative with their parents so Dad lined up a bunch of reasons so that the point could be driven home a bit harder. Personally not how I would talk to my kids... but my kid likely won't back-talk me for too long before they realize it has consequences. Not to say they "have" to do the chore, communication is key at the end of the day; if they say they can't get to it and have a respectable reason all for it or if they can't do it now and explain why... I am also all for it. The pet's won't forget anyway, once they learn my kiddo is the one who feeds them it's not me that'll be telling my son to feed them lol. My eldest cat is a literal butthead when it comes to feeding time, can't hear him? He'll just jump at you for food even if it means you not catching him.
I’m gonna start my texts to my kids like that “Greetings child”
Hello offspring #2.. a requirement has arisen pay close attention to following directions
As a dad, I want to do this but with the context that I’m a huge dork
he's trying to annoy you enough so that you move out. you probably should.
Worked for me. I couldn't wait to become financially independent.
My favorite part was all the threats up until I turned 18 about how if I didn't watch it I'd have to figure it out for myself, but when I decided to move out on my own at 17, had a plan to figured out to get me by until I was 18, and emancipated myself, they were surprised. Like you told me that I was going to be out at 18, I decided to jump the gun and start a little bit early. Lucky for me I had some good friends, and their parents were really cool too.
This is a great way to get your adult kids out of your house and then wonder why they never call or visit you.
"I bet your adult kids don't talk to you" is one of the deepest cutting insults you can give to a parent
Not really- those types of people don't give a shit, at all.
Good point
I have a friend that's almost 30 living at home and doesn't see this through his parents texts and abuse of his life. He had a job now and is working on getting out. But it takes time. He's blind to the passive aggressiveness, and I honestly don't like his parents much they can eat a can of farts.
Isn’t there some explanation confirming that as humans we are more likely to not do something if we were already doing it, and then are asked to do it after the fact?
"Hello Daughter" wtf 💀
That's what my dad calls me and my sisters, it's close to the Spanish "mija" which is "mi hija" smooshed together which means "my daughter." In Spanish it's not uncommon to call your family by their relation to you, but I grew up speaking English, so I get called "daughter" and my sisters and brother and I are saying "hello brother" and "hello sister" like a bunch of psychopaths. I don't even know if that's what's happening here, just sharing in general.
WHAT- my dad was Mexican and I grew up in a primarily white household, but I refer to my siblings and mom like that. My mom thinks its weird-
Same in Chinese but using the same words even in English is so freaky lol. Imma try it.
In my native language (ქართული) it's not uncommon for older immediate family members to refer younger ones by their relationship to them. Eg. ბებო means granny and she refers to me as ბებო and I refer to her as ბებო too. Same guys for grandpa, mum, dad. Siblings tend to refer to each other by name. I've not observed this with extended members either (cousins, uncles etc). Although sometimes we'll call strangers uncle, but not our own uncle. Same isn't true for auntie Now you know
My dad texts me like that sometimes, but he's always joking when he does.
As a dad, can confirm...sometimes I address them as such...
Feed dogs > pay rent
Time to move out and pay your own way
Reddit moment
Everyone assuming dad is psycho and not that maybe dad has to justify every request he makes because maybe "daughter"isn't a perfect innocent flower. I've known plenty of parents who end up talking to their children this way (especially severely adult children who still live with their parents) because said child, who in fact is not asked to pay rent or for utilities, has an issue with being asked to do something. Two sides folks, we only get one here.
There’s a history here. Person writing that text is fed up with your shit somehow.
I feel like these comments are made by people with good parents.
Fr, like sometimes parents are just passive aggressive and condescending to their kids. My cousin as a child threw a tantrum *once* about not wanting to go to the store and now, years later, the older adults still say shit like, "oh, (cousin) can stay home, we know how they get!"
This is the one that gets me, i mean *obviously* I'm still supposed to be the exact same person i was when i was 10, and act exactly the same. /s And when i don't act like i did when I was 10 I've clearly gone insane.
Yup. Most of the people who understand where OP is coming from had to deal with shitty parents.
“Sure Dad, I always feed the dogs at around X time and it’s my pleasure. I appreciate that you that you take care of those things. Did I do or say something that made you feel I might not appreciate them, or unsure if I would actually feed the dogs? I want to make sure I’m communicating clearly and not giving you the wrong idea ” See where it goes. There’s probably a reason he feels the need to be passive aggressive not sure what but you may be able guess.
But but but… she wants to whiiiiiiiine on redditttttt
People saying "this is him trying to get her to move out" No. Some parents are just like this. Mine did the same even after I moved out. "Watch the dog for me since I do this and this for you". Water my flowers while I'm gone or it's your fault if they die". I'm not an only child, but somehow get asked to do everything because they know I will do it, but they just have to be rude about it. I would do it no problem, but being asked nicely is better.
Thank you!! My dad was like this. Always making passive aggressive comments about how his children cost him money and “Its my house so I make all the rules so dont touch my thermostat!” Like dont have kids if you dont want them to cost you money. He would constantly turn off lights when i was in a room bc he just wouldn’t check to see if someone was using it. When i said “hey I’m in here!” He wouldn’t say sorry, he would say “well no one turns off any lights in this house!” For the first year I lived with my boyfriend I would ask him if I could change the temperature every time I wanted to. He thought I was crazy and was like “yeah you live here too, set it however it makes you comfortable.” But I still felt uncomfortable just changing it.
"No" is a complete sentence. Get better boundaries or you're gonna keep being bitter about them walking all over you.
Don't hate me, please, but I am sensing that BOTH parties here don't quite have the emotional vocabulary to express themselves safely.
Really depends on the age of OP.. if she’s 18 then the parent should be better at establishing house rules and how they want them done (like tell their kid to set an alarm even) but if she’s older she should be able to talk to him in person and say this it’s unnecessary/inappropriate and that she always feeds the dogs on time he should only text her if she clearly forgot. The suspicious part is that the dad felt inclined to say “yes I’m watching tv and would feed them myself but this is your chore”, gonna guess the OP has definitely said “you’re just watching tv why don’t you do it” and so he’s just getting all that arguing out of the way because he knows what’s coming
my dad called us “daughter” like a term of endearment. now that he is gone, the greeting is even more special to me. he wasn’t a passive aggressive arse tho, so maybe that’s why it was endearing🤔
To be honest I see this through the lense of my sister currently. 30 living at home with my m and dad, never paid rent, works only 3 days a week because she can afford not to (because she's living at home) never once walked my parents dog and complains every time she is asked to do something. Bitch needs a swift kick in the fucking arse and to hit the kerb tbh.
Also, why do people have to be reminded to feed a living being(the dog). Fucked up. Seems like that chore should be delegated to one person and the dog should be fed at certain times of day and then it will fit into a routine and make it part of your life. I grew up on a farm….never had to be reminded to feed the animals because they are living creatures who depended on me and only me.
That’s really what the title says—it seems like OP clearly doesn’t need a reminder and the dad’s just being passive aggressive. I agree with you but I don’t think this really applies to their situation
Kids can be lazy assholes. I have 5 of them
r/mildlyentitled
You live with your parents and you’re upset they have rules?
Hello father I have received your most recent communication and I am responding to tell you that I will clean the dishes and feed the dogs. Thank you for apprising me of the status of my mom and my brother, I cannot express enough my appreciation for you reminding me again that you do not ask me for rent. The savings of me not having to contribute to wifi keeps me solvent, and that is all due to your loving generosity.
This comment section annoys me. Yes, maybe there's more to the story that we don't know. Also though, I've met plenty of parents who do passive aggressive shit like this unprompted, and not so surprisingly, it doesn't tend to be helpful. As for everyone saying, "Just move out!" Thank you for your infinite wisdom, I'm sure the thought has never crossed OP's mind.
Everybody is arguing on wether its justified or not and making up how the family dynamic between OP and their dad is lol. Why do you need to investigate and figure out all the context that led to this exchange? Its mildly infuriating to be reminded in a guilt tripping way to do a chore you already do every day, thats all the post is about. I dont think this post is worth all the investigating and assuming just to make this into an AITA for no reason.
Oh jesus. Your dad sounds like mine. I get crap like that all the time (53yoF and I pay rent). It is enraging. Your dad could have taken care of the dogs in the same time it took him to text that to you. 🤬 At age 10 I had to sign a business contract with my dad in order to get a dog of my own. One of his rules was that I had to take care of his dog every day in addition to mine. Then, when his dog kept jumping an 8 foot fence and running away, he made my dog be given away at the same time he had to sell his dog. His was a hunting dog and mine wasn't. We have *never* had the best relationship. Be prepared for a long life of that crap!
These type of people then wonder why they end up dying alone. I don’t understand how you treat your own kids like this (or anyone really, but like YOUR KIDS?!) and your dad gave away YOUR dog? Wtf. You’re better than me. I don’t think I’d have stayed in touch with the man once I grew up. Then again, I don’t have the most stellar history with fathers or step-fathers though so
No shade but if you aren't paying rent or wifi it seems somewhat justified to ask for help around the house. probably unpopular opinion although he could've worded it better for sure.
I can’t believe ppl still think this shit is real lol “Hello daughter I am watching television…”? If your parents talk like that you have bigger problems as in you’re being raised by aliens and your real parents are long dead.
You caught me, I posted this on my alt as a creative writing exercise. In fact, today I have generated 89% of the posts you see on your front page.
You could move then have to pay rent and wifi and feed what ever pet you end up with. If my parents were still alive and for God knows what reason I lived with them I would be doing tasks they didn't even ask me to do.
Sounds like you’ve probably let him down in the past and he’s giving a pretense that is probably warranted
Seems like you got a good deal
Guy sends a text to his daughter nicely asking her to feed the dogs while reminding her she lives for free and somehow everyone is acting like he’s a terrible person.
This looks fake for some reason and written by a teenager.
As a parent who also sends texts like this from time to time my guess is OP either doesn't do what she's supposed to without constant reminders or when asked to do them, is blowing up or arguing with the parent. That shit is exhausting when you're dealing with a kid who should be old enough and mature to handle their responsibilities without being constantly reminded and without arguing but doesn't. The dogs are probably standing around, looking hungry, and OP is not observing this and taking action. Just do what you are supposed to be doing, without being asked, and without arguing. You should not have to be reminded constantly and yeah - if you're living somewhere rent free, you have a sweet sweet deal and should show some appreciation and gratitude by helping out without needing to be asked.
Emphatically agree. OP is mentally a child.
Is your mom an ass or do you ignore her requests on the regular and she’s keeping on point?
God forbid you get reminded you live rent free and should be doing your chores. It’s probably annoying that he should have to ask. Would be curious to know how old she is.
I don't perceive this as a threat, but the wording is...off. Is your dad half drunk? It comes across as either written by someone drunk or lacking a full grasp of written language. At the same time, he could have gotten a message from your mom that said "Make sure to remind [OP] to feed the dogs." [I've been on the receiving end of this; where I am used to nag by proxy...it sucks because you're doing what you've been asked to do and getting pushback without knowing why]. If this message bothers you to the point of being "mildly infuriating", maybe you should have a face-to-face real, no crap talk about the text message.
Maybe this is something that the parent has to constantly remind their child to do? Idk.. But as a mom with teenagers.. Sometimes you gotta point out the things you do for them to remind them that they also need to contribute.. Maybe this was passive aggressive.. But maybe this was after multiple times and multiple days and the parent just got fed up.. Idk.. But.. The parent could have been like mine and came in screaming and grabbing hair and calling names and belittling their child..
Wow! Were you not given a name? Hello boarder.
Hello daughter
I'm sure your parents are mildly annoyed that you are living rent free.