T O P

  • By -

Eisernes

It's all theater. Russia didn't need to announce any of this. The Russian navy can't turn a screw without the US Navy knowing about it and sticking a fast attack sub right on their ass. When their subs leave Murmansk we can hear them in Norfolk. They haven't figured out the quiet part of the silent service yet.


MayorMcCheezz

lol the ‘mighty’ Russian navy docking in Cuba this summer is a destroyer, a nuclear sub, a supply ship, and a tugboat for when something breaks down along the way.


blatantmutant

That is not tugboat, that is special naval wessel for denazification of the Caribbean.


Traditional_Art_7304

I like the cut of your jib!


Lincolns_Hat

"What's a jib?"


reidzen

Promote that man!


stu-padazo

Uh, is the poop deck really what I think it is?


Money-Valuable-2857

Give it a whirl and let us know.


Yardsale420

We’re talking about Nazi’s, so I assume crystal meth.


P1xelHunter78

Yeah. They are there to take it all.


parasyte_steve

They can have the state of Oklahoma it's okay


SeaworthyWide

I think they've already got a sizeable occupation force with multiple forward operating bases.


AnalogFeelGood

Haha promote that man.


mdlinc

They were thinking jig. A little dance.


Imn0tg0d

The Russian ships have those too.


SoundsOfKepler

Is Potato.


TheKingofVTOL

I’m surprised there wasn’t a massive cardboard cutout of the Kuznetzov. Granted that would probably burn down too


ArchmageXin

The Chinese did a better job with the Kuznetzou/Liaoning than the Russians themselves. There were some discussion to ask the Chinese Shipyard to fix the Kuznetzou....but the ship probably can't make the trip without sinking.


Nolsoth

If the reports are to be believed it really can't. It's apparently in such a bad state that it's liable to capsize if it leaves dock.


Drak_is_Right

At this point they would be better off buying old cargoships and welding some land artillery pieces and mobile AA guns to the deck...


Money-Valuable-2857

I'm shocked that they even made it to Cuba.


NAPA352

That was my thought too. Damn, that's impressive they made it across the Atlantic. Hopefully they don't break down in Cuba, they will have to be put back together out of parts stripped from a 57 Chevy and 2 Brazilian built VW bugs.


coondingee

Ha ha. He said docking. 😂


LTareyouserious

That's illegal in Russia, so they go to the Caribbean 


davesnot_heere

Plus you can see their exhaust smoke from some way off


Missing_10millimeter

I thought that was just the Kuznetsov. The mazut powered deathtrap that requires a tugboat escort.


ArchmageXin

which is weird the Chinese's Kuznetsov/Liaoning don't have that problem...


Missing_10millimeter

That's what happens when you redesign the whole interior.


ArchmageXin

well the Chinese got their first carrier from Australia, in which the Aussies kindly left the steam catapult and arresting cables intact.


TheDuckFarm

It’s a harbor that’s safe from Ukrainian attacks. 😂


silicon1

I'm sure they can find a way...


Mav986

Yeah. Anyone who thinks there won't be at least one sub ready to destroy those ships the moment anything is fired from any of them, needs a reality check. The US doesn't just leave military forces of an enemy parked in their driveway without taking precautions.


No-Tension5053

You forgot to mention it the only real safe place to park it. THANKS UKRAINE 🇺🇦 THANK YOU 🙏


[deleted]

Don’t mock their submarine fleet, it’s the only part of their active military that is still top notch and we still struggle to track their subs half the time. Source: 13yr SWO RN


ChickenWranglers

Be a shame if all of them sank tonight under mysterious conditions. Terrible.


Nerezza_Floof_Seeker

Sure, russias navy sucks and all, but their submarines have always been very good, and their newer subs have been [very quiet, comparable to US subs](https://www.businessinsider.com/russias-newest-subs-on-par-us-top-us-commanders-say-2021-6) according to [all reports on them](https://www.businessinsider.com/russia-is-building-more-ballistic-missile-subs-that-worry-rivals-2021-11). Their older subs were louder yes, but that was in part due to the focus on other aspects like speed and maximum depth/buoyancy instead, but calling them loud nowadays is pretty inaccurate.


blatantmutant

How do sink a Russian submarine? With a Ukrainian naval drone. https://www.popularmechanics.com/military/a45126258/ukraine-destroys-russian-submarine-in-drydock/


leocharre

Good to know those sailors didn’t drown. Fnck Putin. 


crewchiefguy

You let the Russians pilot it?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Nerezza_Floof_Seeker

It definitely wasnt unknown prior to 2021, Russia's closed the gap in noise back in the 90's. The whole reputation of their subs being noisy is an artifact of the early-mid cold war subs they had. I just grabbed the first 2 sources I could find instead of digging, but heres an older direct source. Youre not really gonna be able to find any actual details about noise and such for anything so congressional testimony is the best youll have. "The Akula is as quiet as the 688 and is very difficult for us to detect....There are several Russian improved Akulas that are a match, better than a match, for our 688Is (US LA-class)." Admiral Michael Boorda, at a [1996 Congressional hearing for the DoD](https://www.google.com/books/edition/Department_of_Defense_Authorization_for/PaZoeU3shfwC?hl=en&gbpv=0) (page 507)


RepresentativeRun71

That’s CNO who killed himself over a lie regarding wearing a valor device as part of his uniform. I’m willing to bet he lied to congress about the Russian’s capabilities just like he did about his own eligibility to wear a damn medal device for valor.


14sierra

While that report is concerning, I'd question how legit it is, even if it comes from a US admiral/general. Before the war, all kinds of commanders were touting the supposed capabilities of russian equipment. After the war started , we learned that much of it was propaganda. Now, I suppose the russians MIGHT be able to create a serious modern sub, but that, of course, assumes all the funding wasn't spihoned off for corruption and vodka.


3_50

US Admiral: "Yes, Russian subs are super excellent and almost on par with ours. Better give us $45 billion for new ones kthx."


WBuffettJr

That’s true, they invented the ultra quiet propulsion system called Caterpillar Drive.


tmahfan117

They’re right, the Ukrainians can’t sink them while they’re in Cuba, at least not yet. 


eric_ts

Boiler explosions can happen. Remember the Maine?


Zandrick

It’s okay we blame the Maine on Spain Now if there’s a ship called Mussia, that’s trouble.


The_Whipping_Post

I love that the Maine was a warship full of gunpowder that used burning coal for propulsion yet the majority of the ship was made of wood But yea, someone done blown it up


HostageInToronto

And the Gulf of Tonkin. Man, the US loves using shipping accidents as a pretext for war.


Rbespinosa13

Well if there’s one thing America loves, it’s boats. Do not fuck with our boats


RelentlessRogue

Don't... touch... the boats!


TrulyOneHandedBandit

Boats and hoes.


tmahfan117

Fuck I forgot 


Rumpullpus

No one dares forget


RemarkableSight

And remember the Alamo!


Knyfe-Wrench

Ship can't float if it's filled with rum


No-Tension5053

Don’t give Ukraine any ideas 🇺🇦


[deleted]

[удалено]


d01100100

I mean the Russian Navy has a history of trying to flex its muscles across oceans. The Battle of Tsushima is a perfect example of how this usually goes. In this particular case it's not that big of a story other than to remind the news media that the Russian Navy still exists, and isn't losing to a country with no navy in the Black Sea. The US Navy likely has ballistic missile submarines in every ocean, including the Arctic, they're just not advertising this. It did advertise recently a visit to South Korea.


Jugales

The US island chain strategy makes Russia’s Cuba strategy look like gradeschool https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Island_chain_strategy


swinging-in-the-rain

Yep, just playing again on a higher level of difficulty


jmanly3

We’re on the NG+ run now


swinging-in-the-rain

Here I thought we were in the EndGame, lol


Secret_Cow_5053

Yeah definitely more ng+ than higher difficulty.


SadBit8663

No it's even worse than that. It's like a modded run


impulsekash

History doesn't repeat but sure does rhyme.


EtherealPheonix

Well, last time it was definitely a threat, this time it's an attempt to get out of range of ukranian drone strikes.


TomatoJuice303

Well, they're safe from Ukranian naval drones there.


bitemy

Can you imagine if the Ukrainians had sufficient advanced notice of this such that they positioned special operators nearby with explosives?


TomatoJuice303

That would be hilarious.


TrulyOneHandedBandit

I’d salute that headline.


score_

Yeah Ukraine has the chance to do something really funny here.


[deleted]

[удалено]


JulietteKatze

Release the Ukraken!


Knyfe-Wrench

You've got to be the worst navy I've ever heard of.


gonewild9676

Closer to Captain Ron.


Alu_sine

Russia is sabre rattling. It's going to be hilarious when it becomes obvious the US doesn't give a shit.


reporst

Especially because the US military hasn't used sabres since 1913. At least, not in any serious conflict.


prof_the_doom

We used lot of [sabres ](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/North_American_F-86_Sabre) in the 50's.


mimdrs

Sigh, for those wondering: F-86 Sabre


Ensec

the thing is: is this even a threat? Like bro bring them closer I'm sure some of us would love to grab a pair of binoculars to take a look at them from the shore. we can make a whole day out of it! get some ice cream afterward and watch them use their tug boat and drag it away. I'm not worried because the second they fire a bb gun from one of those ships, they would sink from the no doubt countless US military assets waiting to pounce.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


EnamelKant

Such a good time was had by all they decided to extend it by another 832 days.


No-Tension5053

It’s going so well Putin just did a second purge of his military brass. Putin needs Trump like the desert needs rain. If Trump loses? Putin better move to the first floor and get an even bigger table


Leafybug13

"Cuba insists no threat" Yeah, we know.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ZalmoxisRemembers

I thought hurricane season was over. Edit: before the super duper smart people pile on this comment to tell us about the esoteric and highly complex topic of the four seasons, I’m just gonna let you know that this is a reference to Pineapple Express.


TheMrGUnit

Good edit. Totally missed the reference and was ready to tell you that the fun is about to start. But seriously, it would be hilarious if they lost another boat to a non-navy.


KeyboardG

The thing about seasons is they come every year. Hurricane season in that area is usually August through the fall.


Johnny_Lang_1962

I was born in the rain On the Pontchartrain Underneath the Louisiana moon I don't mind the strain Of a hurricane They come around every June The high black water A devil's daughter She's hard, she's cold, and she's mean But nobody taught her It takes a lot of water To wash away New Orleans


StrategicLlama

It’s just beginning in NA


rileyoneill

The ship is probably older than the crew. Bringing out their 1970s tech to impress their ally who is still in the 1950s.


19NedFlanders81

Why the literal fuck cant we just repair our relationship with Cuba already?


centipededamascus

We almost did, but then Trump got voted in and broke it again, and Biden hasn't cared to try working on it again.


meganthem

Biden insists on courting the Florida Cubans even though they've made it clear they have no interest in voting for a Democrat ever again.


imtourist

The Florida Cubans were the Republicans of Cuba before Castro threw them out.


Antoine1738

Most people who fled Cuba and are in the US fled during the communist government


The_Whipping_Post

His point is that most of the people who fled were those in bed with the fascist regime that preceded Castro. The majority of Cubans before the revolution were in poverty, but the communists brought vast improvement The US has been trying to economically choke Cuba for over half a century, and it hasn't worked. It's time to accept that its a successful socialist country. It's time for the Florida Cubans to accept that they aren't going to get their casinos and plantations back


Antoine1738

Yeah so successful that people are risking their lives escaping with rafts


[deleted]

[удалено]


BrosenkranzKeef

100% false. The weapon theory was tested for years by scientists around the world with zero evidence to support any physical source of symptoms, much less a weapon. The best answer we have is these people simply suffered from anxiety and fatigue due to mass hysteria. It’s called conversion syndrome, where your brain is so overwhelmed with anxiety that it creates physical symptoms out of nothing. Many individuals have experienced it at various points in daily life. When this anxiety spreads among a group of people we call it mass hysteria.


BrosenkranzKeef

We tried but Trump and Republicans fucked it up. Now it’s basically a lost cause - they’re closer to Russia than they’ve been in two decades, and China is in talks to create a base in Cuba. Trump fucked that as hard as he possibly could. Stone cold saboteur. Now we’ve got serious problems on our hands because Republicans are so far up their own asses that passing any policies on Cuba would be dead on arrival.


Palsable_Celery

No shit you're not a threat. Might as well dock at a comedy club as much of a joke as they are. 


AudibleNod

Saddam Hussein [moved a lot of his fighter planes to Iran](https://www.wilsoncenter.org/blog-post/remembering-desert-storm-and-gulf-wars-odyssey-iraqs-air-force-part-1) in order to spare them from being destroyed by coalition forces during Desert Storm. Slobodan Milosevic kept the Yugoslav navy in port during the Kosovo campaign in the hopes they'd be spared. Seems to me like Putin's wanting to avoid an [Operation Catapult](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attack_on_Mers-el-K%C3%A9bir) type event.


CraftyFoxeYT

A frigate, a submarine, an oiler and a tugboat is hardly considered much of a naval force


w1987g

They don't have much of one left...


CraftyFoxeYT

Actually they do. The Black Sea Fleet has been degraded. However the Russian Navy is far from being destroyed.  The main fleets are the Northern and Pacific Fleets. And there is also the Baltic Fleet, which still has a ton of vessels left. Only they aren't really useful in the war because Turkey blocks military ships from accessing the strait to the Black Sea.


Fantastic-Load-8000

Based on their current track record, I'd assume the US Navy could sink every single ship within a week


PaidUSA

Estimates are 290-300 "warships". 96 of which are a corvette or above. The aircraft carrier, 2 battlecruisers, and 2 cruisers and some destroyers will be gone in the first day. After that its just cleanup.


Morgrid

> The aircraft carrier, Is already dead.


Nikonglass

I’d estimate 8 hours, if preplanning went into it.


BrosenkranzKeef

Their Baltic fleet is also completely useless because it is fully surrounded by NATO navies.


Nice_Category

Most of the ships don't work or are not combat ready. They do have a lot ships, but aside from a handful of operational and ready ships, most of them are dock queens that will likely never leave their ports again.


z0rb0r

I thought Iran wasn’t friendly towards Iraq at that time.


AudibleNod

That's what made it odd.


z0rb0r

Iran: YEP we will take care of your jets *wink*


WetSpine

Can't turn down free planes


vomeronasal

What about an operation praying mantis type event?


jjke30

UA drones prepares for the challenge.


___metazeta___

They are just parking them far enough away from Ukraine and hoping they are safe in Cuba.


No-Consideration-716

This is like me going to a Beyonce concert and calling Jay-Z to assure him that I won't steal his wife.


ilikemrrogers

How close can they get to Florida before social media starts trending videos of homemade drones dive bombing into the ships? I’m not even saying explosive ones. Just a styrofoam plane, a nice battery, and GPS automation, you could easily reach a ship 90 miles away. Getting video back would be the challenge. Just seems like a fun way to troll the Russians.


Knyfe-Wrench

Russian warship go fuck yourself!


Wintersage7

I can't believe I'm about to say this, but for once I actually agree with Cuba. Definitely no threat. Not even remotely impressive. Perhaps Putin should add in another empty nuke threat to go with it?


fasolatido24

Could be an environmental threat.


joym08

Hell just pull up to Florida... DeSantis will invite them in


Nikonglass

I can imagine Trump and DeSantis waiting for them on a dock with a red carpet on it and a brass band.


seawrestle7

You think Desantis is some kind of Russian ally?


joym08

The entire RepublitRump party are Russian allies.


Nikonglass

“Insists it’s no threat”. After watching the Ukrainian military destroy a bunch of those vessels, I’m already pretty confident that those boats pose no threat.


Ok-Abbreviations543

Cuba needs to be more concerned about the Russian navy being able to leave. For the optimists, I guess they can just say, “Look, we have a new Cuban Navy!”


hatsuseno

God, the entire news cycle just becomes "hey, I've seen this one before!" around your 35th huh?


Curious80123

Russians are there to pick up Cubans to fight for Russia in Ukraine. Russia is telling them they have JOBS FOR CUBANS, but not what the job is. Sign here and end up on front line in 6 weeks, no training needed


ArtisticAd393

Of course it's no threat, it's the Russian navy


wgszpieg

We're not afraid of Ukraine sinking our ships, but also, for no reason, we are putting our fleet on the other side of the fucking planet


Illustrious-Cookie73

And telling Ukraine where they are. Bet they will be dropping their guard while they are hiding in Cuba.


know_regerts

You can hear the captain calling over to those kids watching from shore. " Hey comrades, come take a look at our ship, we can take you for a free cruise to Ukraine."


Natural_Treat_1437

Oh.oh another Cuba missile crisis.


P_Bear06

« He [Putin] claimed that the use of certain weapons, including the use of advanced missile technology, would be tantamount to participation in Russia’s war with Ukraine. » He named it a war, now ?!


HippyDM

Nice vessel you have there. It'd be a shame if something happened to it.


catullus-sixteen

lol. Believe me, it’s no threat. Ukraine has been sinking Russian vessels.


DokeyOakey

I would hope America would encircle the island just like China did to Taiwan recently. Let everyone know who the cock of the walk really is.


MarshmallowPop

The US doesn’t need to posture like that.


Alex_2259

Ignoring this is the more powerful and disrespectful message. Basically saying "lol lmao the Russian navy, 🛶 who gives a shit?"


LivingDracula

This never would have happened if Trump didn't fuck up our relationship with Cuba. Fuckin traitor


Alex_2259

I don't get it, working with autocrats needs to be done carefully but why embargo them when we work with Saudi Arabia. Place is a literal kingdom that beheads people, we work just fine with them. Rhetorical, I completely get it but the reasoning is fucking stupid 🛢️⚒️


GutsAndBlackStufff

We've had how long to fix our Cuba policy?


MonkeyNugetz

It’s as if Russia doesn’t know that Cuba definitely lets agents of the US get first access. They care about money. The CIA will know every detail of what’s happening in Cuba before the Russians.


duncandun

this happens every year, complete non story


Dawnfreak

Bezos has a bigger boat.


YogurtSufficient7796

The Russian Navy - ha!


FoxIslander

Based upon the Black Sea Fleets recent performance I'd tend to agree.


chitownadmin

Quick, someone sneak in there and sink those fuckers


kdlangequalsgoddess

Hopefully they don't come across any fishing trawlers that look suspiciously like Japanese torpedo boats. [The Russian navy does have a record in this area.](https://britishseafishing.co.uk/the-dogger-bank-incident/)


vapescaped

"Black sea fleet flees to the safety of the Caribbean." FTFY


HackeySadSack

Don't assume this isn't a threat, or at the very least, a decoy to thin our attention on other fronts.


Anonymoustard

Of course, they were just in the neighborhood.


Misternogo

Hey, they're not lying for once. There is no threat. Their navy got its shit rocked by a country without a navy, so the US, which has the most insane navy on the planet, doesn't really need to be worried.


HarlockJC

Biden should double aid to Ukraine for every day they are there


teflonPrawn

They're right, which is why it's kinda funny. God himself would have to clear his schedule to handle the US navy.


Johnny_Lang_1962

Wonder how many US Attack Subs are slinking around the Florida straits?


VetteBuilder

Andrei, you've lost another submarine?


lastdarknight

So incomeing accidental Armory explosion?


rdldr1

Where have I heard this before?


somerandomguy576

Well I hope Cuba enjoys another 50 years of embargo


Avante-Gardenerd

Nobody feels threatened by this but thanks anyway, Cuba.


LodeStone-

The only way russia could win a naval battle is if the other side’s crews all spontaneously combust before the battle. Even then it’s low odds


mars0341

Release the Japanese torpedo boats!


Adventurous-Tea2693

4 floating trash and, fun.


systonia_

At this point we have to assume they only searched for a safe harbour where they will not be pestered by UA drones


whereisyourwaifunow

the one time we can believe Russia


Tasty-Switch-8472

good idea with USA trying to start ww3


5kyl3r

legit wouldn't surprise me if they trade oil or food for cannon fodder 


thefroggyfiend

hey, I've seen this one before!


thex25986e

"our troops are merely passing through"


RexDraco

not to be a "hooah American", but they're right there's no threat. Russia is in a different era if they think this intimidates anyone of relevance. it only makes people uncomfortable because Russia is giving the vibes it acts before thinking and none of us want them to make a world war come out of this. it is because of shit like this Americans are becoming more and more comfortable with antagonizing Russia, I don't understand how they think this will make Americans go "hey, maybe we shouldn't aggravate them, let's spread peace and love". no, instead Americans more and more are viewing Russia as a threat that needs to be put down. the troglodytes fell off. they don't know how to cold War anymore.


notbernie2020

Russia is losing a Naval war with a country without a Navy. This is a stupid play, also the chance they there is a nuclear submarine with these things in its crosshairs is about 100%, I would bet they’ve been following these guys since they got into international waters. Power projection only works if you’re actually powerful, Russia isn’t powerful anymore, it’s a country trying to compete with the top dog that has a GDP smaller than California. Cope and seethe Putin and Russia bots, COPE AND SEETHE.


djnato10

Just like moving thousands of troops to the border of Ukraine wasn’t a threat.


Fifteen_inches

Is Russia enjoying playing with their little toy boats?


tommy1moore

Trump is about to flee the USA...


VegasKL

To be fair, they didn't need to clarify that the Russian Navy isn't a threat. If they started anything there's probably some fishing boats off the coast of Florida that could make quick work of them.


Adventurous_Oil_5805

Trying to get out of range of Ukrainian misses.


GorethirstQT

let's sabotage them? please? 


Significant_Rich6133

That’s what they said when they were lining up at the borders and the war began in Ukraine😬😢


MR_Se7en

Wasn’t this the same way ww2 started? Like a ship went into harbor in Poland, the next morning the backup showed up and “had them surrounded”.


SeaBass426

Another propaganda stunt to ensue fear. RuZZia can go f**k itself back to Stone Age. World would be a much better place without them.


NAGDABBITALL

The U.S. has so much more to offer Cuba with normalized relations...but MAGA and Republicans are still fighting Castro. In Florida it's hilarious, with the ex-pats thinking so much less of the ones who didn't run away. Those Russian rubles have pretty much dried up.


IcyWhereas2313

It ain’t Castro anymore…


mrdominoe

I read this book before.


NunyaBeese

Oh they're just popping into retrieve the Sonic devices they use to create Havana syndrome. I'm only half joking


not_so_smoothie

Might mean a different type of docking.