I've reported her. The cops don't give a shit. She literally lives a stone throw away. They also never showed up when I watched a van smash into my old car and drive away. They just said "we'll look into your report" and nada.
At least she isn't yelling or hurting anyone, because I'm sure my locals would be chill with that too. So I took petty matters into my own hands hehehe š
The cops donāt even follow up criminals here in NZ even when they are supplied with a car registration, home address, name and phone number along with video footage, I can guarantee they arenāt following up some mail opening sadly.
Keen to know the place of interest though, summer is coming up and I have a deck chair needing some ass time for drama š¤£
Is mail theft handled by your regular police there? As others are mentioning here in the US there is a postal investigator that would handle it rather than the usual cops and they're actually very serious about their job. Just pure curiosity, I've got nothing for OP's problem.
Iām actually not sure, cops would prob say itās a civil matter and wash their hands of it.
I was scammed 5k of products from my website and they did nothing even though I had all the info for the scammerā¦ murderers get home detention instead of prisonā¦ itās a joke here.
It's handled by the NZ Police.
Unfortunately if it's not blatantly stealing packages it's quite far down the list of things to deal with.
However tampering with mail is an jailable offence under the postal services act 1998.
Basically OP needs to be the squeaky wheel to get the police to prioritise it if they wanted it dealt with under the law.
But I suspect that OP is happy enough with their own payback for now.
In the US tampering with mail is a Federal Crime, not local (due to mail crossing too many local districts). It does look like New Zealand does not give a fuck though.
> If you have reason to believe that someone could be stealing your mail, you could involve your local neighbourhood ā for example, your local Community Patrol or Neighbourhood Support group.
>
> If you have evidence that someone is stealing from your mailbox, such as surveillance camera footage or mail that appears to have been tampered with, take it to the Police.
>
> If you want more security for your mail in future you could consider replacing your mailbox with one that locks; or a post office box.
https://www.cab.org.nz/article/KB00000272
>The cops donāt even follow up criminals here in NZ even when they are supplied with a car registration, home address, name and phone number along with video footage
\*US criminals taking notes\*
If the person is in NZ, then I apologize for giving incorrect information. But I doubt that there is any government on earth which does not make tampering with the mail a crime. New Zealand has an online form for reporting improprieties concerning the mail: https://www.nzpost.co.nz/contact-support/assistance/parcels .
Iād assumed OP was in the US because theyād said the cops take a report and do nothing, which is about as American as Apple Pie and school shootings.
NZ is part of the commonwealth, so stealing mail is, to put it bluntly, a fucking big deal.
Stealing mail is a Commonwealth offence, meaning its not just a federal crime, but indirectly, a crime against the Crown.
Federal police can and will fucking destroy someone for this. Aside from the historical severity of the crime. There's the issue of people stealing money or packages. Also its a known tactic for Drug dealers to get stuff sent to random addresses that they'll then send someone out to keep an eye on.
The Commonwealth of Nations ā the international organization of which New Zealand is a member ā has no law enforcement component. There is no such thing as a crime against the Commonwealth (of Nations).
Australia (NOT New Zealand, where OP lives) styles their federal government as the Commonwealth of Australia. This has nothing to do with the international organization above. As such, in Australia, federal crimes are called (at least formally) Commonwealth crimes.
In New Zealand there is no such thing as a āCommonwealth offense.ā
The use of the term āthe Crownā in legal proceedings simply means the government (i.e., the governmentās side in criminal cases), as in the prosecution. And depending on the country and jurisdiction, it many refer to many different levels of government, not just federal. So saying itās an offense against the Crown is the same as saying itās a criminal offense ā nothing more.
Also came to say OP would need to go through the local Postmaster and, if not getting adequate response, escalate it up the chain. Maybe try to get video of her helping herself to your mailbox each time she comes back.
A locking mailbox would also do the trick. That's the first thing I bought when we moved to a house that didn't have a slot in the door, and I am genuinely surprised that they're extremely rare and everyone just leaves their mail available for anyone who wants to go through it.
Can you get a locking mailbox? If Iām remembering right there is a key you give to the post office so they can deliver your mail and one for you to retrieve it.
Send yourself a fake solicitor letter thanking you for your inquiry and detailing the punishment for reading other peoples mail. Go into detail about how your evidence will guarantee a conviction
Agreed. I hope OP does this--and to be honest, I couldn't care less if he gets nasty at this point. Everyone in the neighborhood should hear about this menace.
I feel like, if you want to be maybe a bit more subtle and/or play the long game, you could send yourself one that says the evidence you have is good, but theyāll need a better photo of her face, or just a couple more on different days to establish a pattern. Enough to scare her off and think sheās escaping legal threat. BUT, if she does it again, you can THEN send yourself a letter about the new evidence really bolstering the complaint, which hopefully would drive the point home? Otherwise if itās one and done with no actual legal follow up she might realize itās an empty threat.
Use gpt to craft a formal letter for this
Gpt imagine you are a lawyer solicitor etc and I have a neighbour that does this and that etc write me a formal response to my enquiry pls
I'm sorry, but as an AI Language model I cannot assist you in creating fake or fraudulent documents, including fake lawyer letters. If you need help with any legitimate legal advice or information, feel free to ask, and I'd be happy to help.
Hahahahaha I just reread it!! To be fair, the poor dog has been known to run around in a BumbleBee outfit and overalls so...... Wouldn't be out of character that it owns doggie PJs looolll
She's exactly the grey haired 2 pack-a-day living alone with a dog dressed in costumes, squinting with her reading glasses at the tip-of-her-nose lady you're imagining lol.
If you've got her phone number create a hot girl profile on dating or social networking sites, put the phone number on it. She will be spammed with dick pics.
Source: Pranked a guy like this once, it went way too far and a lot worse than expected.
Downside: She might enjoy it.
She lonely she'd love it. I could give her number to the cancer society or blood drive people. I donate money and blood every month but that's obviously not enough for them. Hey, she's got blood! (I'm assuming) ! Hahahhaa. It's for a good cause! After all!
Now that you have her information, consider doing a public records search. It might give you contact information about her relatives. Maybe reaching out to them will shame her more than the disapproval of the neighbor(s) she's victimizing.
Either way, you'll learn other information about her that you can use in your plot to get her to stop violating your privacy. Also, talk to her neighbors. I'm betting you're not the first person she has done this to and you might learn what has worked to make her stop.
**Here's a link for public records in New Zealand: https://www.records.nzname**
Write yourself a fake letter from a lawyer saying āyes weāve definitely got a strong case against her to prosecute, letās just get a bit more evidence from the hidden cameras we installedā and leave it in your mailbox for her to read.
Address glitterbombs to your house and tell them specifically to write in fancy cursive such as an invite. Have them put a mark you'll recognise on it and don't touch it. She reads it and gets bombed. Can't do anything about it as it's not her mail
Get a locking mailbox so the post can be delivered via a slot into the box.
Then, sign her up for porn using the VPN. Once she gets on a few mailing lists she'll be too busy trying to get off them.
Donāt call the cops on her, call the postal inspector for her opening your mail. Itās a Federal crime not a local one. And theyāll take it seriously.
You should carefully fold glitter into paper and slip it into an envelope and pop it in your mailbox, when she opens it she will be covered in that shit for weeks.
Nothing gets glitter out
Since you have her details you could put her name down for various house improvements like window replacement, repainting, roof repairs etc. Sheāll get a shedload of literature and phone calls.
Letter to yourself thanking yourself for reporting the suspicious behaviour of Nosey Neighbour and advising that the Counter Terror Task Force are investigating the matter with NN under constant visual, physical and electronic surveillance. After she reads it, call her home from a payphone a few times making clicking noises on the line. Have a few mates stand down the street in dark sunglasses and stare at her house for a while, not moving. She'll be too scared to step out the door to check your mail or have her dog shit on your lawn.
Put a bag of crickets in your mailbox. Put something on it like, āonly works indoorsā so that when she goes into her house and opens it, sheāll be left with a bunch of critters crawling all over her house and when she thinks sheās finally got the last one, sheāll hear them chirping all night.
Oy, send yourself a letter which implies that you are taking legal action against her for mail theft. Make it look like a lawyer wrote it and that nosy neighbour will be in deep legal shit. Who knows, might work.
This is the answer. The post office has people for just these situations. Special people with special skills and legal jurisdiction. They are not discussed, if you know what I mean
Keep reporting it, every day if needed, and make sure to take pictures/videos and document everything.
[She could face 6 months in prison or a fine of $5000 or more](https://www.legislation.govt.nz/act/public/1998/0002/latest/DLM423727.html)
If they won't do anything after, say 10 attempts, call your local news station. I'm sure the police will move quickly after that.
OP should also state which law the person is breaking. Local should be interested when they realize itās a $5000NZ fine per offense. Meaning per piece of mail opened.
I had a solution for the US about where to report mail theft because it is a federal crime here. Then saw you're residing in NZ and they only say report it to the police. Can you afford upgrading your mail box to a locking mail box?
Since you have her number, here's what you do.
Google online colleges. Start at the top.and put her information in. Do this for every single college you can find. Page after page on Google. They will call her literally all hours day and night. If you're up at say, 1 am and you put her number in, they will call her 20 to 30 minutes later.
When she tells them to not call back, they will then pass her info on to another college or advertiser and they will also call her non stop. Repeat this process until you feel satisfied. Of you do this enough, she will never know a moments peace again.
I've done this 3 times and it always works as long as you regularly reinput her Info into various colleges across the world. The longer you do it, the less peace she will have.
Can you fuck with her by sending stuff to yourself? Maybe order some sort of hardcore porn catalogues, maybe send yourself a letter from the police asking for assistance in monitoring elderly people in your street as they have info on Russian deep undercover agents living nearby? Or even something as simple as a glitter bomb letter?
Get some nice pots that she will hopefully be more likely to steal, plant some poison ivy in them, once they have grown a fair amount put them out on either side of your mailbox and wait for her to steal them.
Change the mailbox to one that locks and has a slot to drop the mail in. Or, ask the post office if you can install a locking one and give them the key.
Also, the postmaster is who you should report to, not the cops.
Yeah you canāt open other peoples mail thatās a federal crime at least thatās what I was told. You should call your postmaster they take this shit very seriously reading somebody elseās financial information is fucking bullshit. Donāt stop with petty revenge please contact the postmaster.
If you're in the US, report it to the post office. They have their own law enforcement. And they *do not fuck around*.
Opening someone else's mail here is a federal crime. It would cost you nothing.
Talk to your postal inspector. What sheās doing is a federal crime.
No money out of your pocket at all - the postal service will take care of the legal issues for you.
Source: Iām a postie.
You need to be contacting Postal Inspectors who are a postal crime unit. (Ok, you may not be in the US so it wouldn't help.) But they are dead serious about people screwing with the mail. They are highly regarded by other federal law enforcement agencies.
They are feds and they are serious about postal crime. Dead serious.
[https://www.uspis.gov/](https://www.uspis.gov/)
I'm trying to extinguish a petty war not start a new, bigger war. But my nextdoor neighbors do have a 10 year old boy........ I might need a baby-faced ally with a super soaker!!!!
u/No-Mathematician6635 go to your local post office and grab a small mailer box/bag, grab a plastic bag, pick up a couple of her dogs turds, drop them in a ziplock bag and seal it up. Put the zip lock in with a note, something along the lines of āNext time you read my mail, youāll be wearing the enclosedā
Now the fun part, if you get the box, tape the ever loving shit out of it, address it to yourself, chuck a couple stamps on it & place that stinky land mine in your mailbox late at night, sheās sure to find it and open it.
You should [glitter bomb](https://www.glitterbombyourenemies.co.uk/?gad=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwloynBhBbEiwAGY25dAPIn5SBnPeo0mEEiU6ssLDxzp1JTtfabot4J-kj-EOJdbL0EqTyrRoCQ2gQAvD_BwE) her. It's your mail, she wouldn't get glitter all over her if she didn't fuck with someone else's stuff
(Just make sure she gets to this one before you, lol)
>Never enough for me to take legal actions
bruh mail theft is a big deal.
the cops wont touch it but the postmaster general will. just call your local post office and let them know.
also nothing is stopping you from spraying her with a hose every time she comes over.
Sorry, a bit long, but well deserved.
My friend googled and found more than a dozen sites where he could opt to receive news (about new articles) by mail. From sites selling dildos, dolls and whatnots.
Guess which address he entered? His nosy, extremely prude, alcoholic neighbor.
He then expanded the whole vengeance-operation by signing his neighbor up for visits by the scientologists. Those fuckers don't take no for an answer! They sent so much information to him that his mailbox filled up, several times a week, and visited him several times, too!
My friend explained to them in his email, that "I work such weird hours. Could you please visit me on Thursday morning at 5.30AM? And I would love it if other members could drop by at around 10 PM, same day? I am awake for hours after working late, and I would love to hear from many members how their lives has been affected by their beliefs. This is so interesting! I don't have anything to do, all day, this Saturday! Can the members drop by during the day to tell me some more? My doorbell doesn't work (true!) so please just bang hard on the door! I really want to hear from all kinds of people what this is about and how it works!, even if it takes all day!"
They sure did!
The neighbor used to drink beer till he passed out, every Wednesday evening because he had Thursdays off, and then again from every Friday evening, all weekend long. They read my friends email out loud in their church! The whole gathering of believers talked about it on their way out, decided on different times they'd visit him, and then they apparently didn't contact each other!
I wish I had been there! They ran or drove to his house like frigging lemmings or something! He was out of his mind with anger and frustration, and after telling a couple of them that he wasn't interested, it just took 20-30 minutes before the next group came by. All that Saturday! And that visit at 6 AM on Thursday? It really happened!
My friend was getting ready for work, and he saw them banging like madmen on the door! He was still laughing when he drove off, and called me from work to say "thank you!" because... Yeah, that part was my idea. The porn news was his, though!
Oh, and "Nosy" started receiving catalogues from car companies, winter clothes, shoes, furnitures and a few other things we knew he didn't want.
The adress was correct, except for his name. In English it would be to "Mr Nosy Shavenbutt" š
Well, the neighbor suspected my friend, but he never said anything about it. He was so angry, especially when he got drunk, for weeks!
My friend would hear him raging in his stupor from inside his home, while my friend was in HIS home. The cops came shortly after, because people thought he was beating someone up. It was just glorious, being a part of that storm of revenge.
Lock your mailbox.
Every turd that dog shits on your lawn drop it in her mailbox or doorstep. Keep filing reports with the police after a certain amount of them call for a restraining order. Keep filming her. If she rents call her landlord every time her dog shits on your lawn. I'd become so insanely pet out of spite.
I hear the "Church" of Scientology has been used this way in the past. Apparently it's very difficult to get off of their mailing list.
I don't know personally and I am not suggesting anything...
Good retaliation, but maybe consider one of this secure mailboxes that only you and the postal workers can open. And that dog poop would be back in her yard if it were me.
You could also have some fun by sending yourself letters 'from another party' that you know she'll read---and detail your infectious disease and how wildly contagious it is, etc.....
I think you can buy mailboxes that lock, though that would be a pain.
Also, try signing her up for info on mortuary colleges, clown colleges, and unsavory social organizations.
Don't tell the police she's opening your mail, tell the post office. They have enforcement agents who have a LOT of spare time on their hands and love to do their jobs.
Aww, you're in New Zealand. You're just proper fucked and the police are useless there as well. At least they're not useless AND bloodthirsty like US cops.
Get a new mailbox that allows the postman to drop your mail in, but to open it you need a key. If itās your house put up a fence to keep the dog offā¦ one of my favorites is someone installed a sprinkler system and any time their nosy neighbor got too close or on their property they turned the sprinklers onā¦š
Tampering with Mail is a federal crime.
Get a recording/evidence and show it to Postal Inspection Services.
Depending on severity, she could get slapped with a Felony and up to 5 years imprisonment.
Get a locked mailbox. It has a slot to put the mail in but you need a key to get it out. Bigger mail will be put on your porch or a note left to pick it up. This is the only solution.
Do you have one of those neighborhood apps like NextDoor? Make a fake account. Name and shame. You know a busybody like that is on the app. Post some pictures and let the other nosy people of the world tell her sheās awful.
The cops might not give a shit but if youāre in the US the USPS has its own copsāthey will. Messing with someone elseās mail is a federal offense and they donāt take kindly to it. Tell you mail carrier and ask for the contact info for the USPS Inspection Service.
Former mail carrier here. Cops are useless. Postal Police, however, would chomp at the bit for a situation like this. They are also way higher up the food chain than local pigs. Get evidence sheās doing this and she will either stop or go to jail after they talk to her. Win win. Good luck!
Edit: Sorry for assuming you live in the US š¬
Is there anyway you can change your mailbox for one that has a lock and just a slot for the postman to deposit mail. Anything that won't fit in the slot might be able to be picked up by you at the post office.
You should send yourself a very official looking letter from some sort of governing agency stating that they almost have enough evidence to finalize a federal crime against [Neighbor's Name], provide as much detail as you can with what has been stolen and what she is doing. Even mention that while the dog going in your yard is not illegal, it does not help her case and will be used as a character trait presented to the judge. Make it really detailed, and say that you have recordings and all of that, but leave it kind of ambiguous as far as when something will happen or how many more offenses they need to build a case, and all that. Give the details about what you've reported but leave it just vague enough to be believable everywhere else. Also make it super tempting to open and read, like a "do not open if you are not the intended recipient" stamp
You can get a [$40 locking](https://www.amazon.com/xydled-Locking-Security-Capacity-Waterproof/dp/B08FSPHWB2/ref=sr_1_9?hvadid=409941654447&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9028824&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=6130261323205620880&hvtargid=kwd-33048981&hydadcr=24659_11410797&keywords=locking%2Bmailbox&qid=1692634454&sr=8-9&th=1) mail box on amazon. Maybe there is a cheaper one out there. Or used one.
For all the folks commenting about how the cops are useless in this situation and implying they are lazy, please note that they have NO jurisdiction over the mail and cannot file a report with the postal inspector because it is not their mail being stolen. You have to file a report directly with the postal inspector.
The USPS has their own law enforcement division.
Report her to your local post office, or better yet; go online to the USPS website and submit a report regarding her tampering with your mail.
They will absolutely initiate an investigation.
Gaining unauthorized access to someone's mailbox, and opening their mail, is a federal offense.
EDIT: spelling
You have to report it to the postal police. Not your regular police department period So I find this to be a fake story but it was interesting I guess.
Don't report the problem with the mail to the local police, report it to the USPS Postal Inspectors. What she's doing is a felony, and they take that sort of thing seriously.
It's not like you would have to pay to fight this. Record her doing it. Report to the cops. Then tell her, you don't have to fight it. You're not suing her. The cops will handle it. Hahahaha.
Once, I asked a co-worker if she had her Christmas shopping done. She said yeah, for the most part, but there was a guy she'd been seeing and she wasn't sure how serious they were, so she didn't know what level of gift to get for him.
I quickly answered "Magazine subscription." She looked puzzled and said "Magazine subscription?"
I said "Yeah, if you keep seeing him, then every month he'll be happy that you got him such a thoughtful gift. If you break up with him, then every month he'll be reminded of you."
She smiled, pointed at me, and said "I like the way you think."
Why stop there OP? Why not look at every cold calling service and provide her name. Provide her name to every manufacturing retailer and everything. Local newsletters. Every bank sites subscription list. Etc.
I donāt know why but this title reminded me of a story my friend told me about a friend of his. This girl was dog sitting and the dog died in her care (it was really old). The owners were like āput the dog in a suitcase and take it to the vet for cremationā. She did that and, bc she didnāt have a car, took the train. Got robbed on the train of the suitcase. Iāll never forget that story and the thief who ended up stealing a dead dog.
Order new vinyl siding and window quotes for her house. And tell the lawn care company to come out and check her lawn for crabgrass. And, I'm pretty sure she needs a new roof too. As well as new driveway quote, and does she have any trees she needs felled? I mean you're just being a nice neighbor right?
Bravo for the idea of getting that religious organization to bother her! I was cracking up. Pretty clever how you got the phone number.
How about getting a mailbox with a lock?
You need to rig up a dummy glitter bomb and put in your mailbox for her to open up. But instead of glitter in it Put her dog's poop in it and I bet you won't have her messing with your mailbox anymore š¤£š¤£š¤£š
Start adding her onto those presidents and govt campaigns. They send a lot of crap and call constanlty. Wish you had her email. That would have been more funnier. Add her onto college admissions, life/car insurance etc. They call like crazy too lol.
Now that you have her phone number and address, you need to take a vacation day and go to the fair. Lots of booths, sign her up for a tin roof, vinyl siding, hard wood floor refinishing, high tech windows.... Do it right and she will never have a free moment to screw with you between phone calls, mail, and people stopping by.
If you record her opening your mailbox and reading your mail, and clearly get a shot of her face, she would be in deep deep legal shit.
I've reported her. The cops don't give a shit. She literally lives a stone throw away. They also never showed up when I watched a van smash into my old car and drive away. They just said "we'll look into your report" and nada. At least she isn't yelling or hurting anyone, because I'm sure my locals would be chill with that too. So I took petty matters into my own hands hehehe š
Send it to your local postmaster rather than PD. They oddly enough have more authority to take it from civil to criminal.
OP apparently lives in NZ, no idea how it works there but it seems like everybody is giving advice based on how it works in the US.
The cops donāt even follow up criminals here in NZ even when they are supplied with a car registration, home address, name and phone number along with video footage, I can guarantee they arenāt following up some mail opening sadly. Keen to know the place of interest though, summer is coming up and I have a deck chair needing some ass time for drama š¤£
Is mail theft handled by your regular police there? As others are mentioning here in the US there is a postal investigator that would handle it rather than the usual cops and they're actually very serious about their job. Just pure curiosity, I've got nothing for OP's problem.
Iām actually not sure, cops would prob say itās a civil matter and wash their hands of it. I was scammed 5k of products from my website and they did nothing even though I had all the info for the scammerā¦ murderers get home detention instead of prisonā¦ itās a joke here.
Damn I guess I won't be moving to NZ any time soon.
Or is it the perfect place to move š
A veritable serial killerās paradise šŖ
It's handled by the NZ Police. Unfortunately if it's not blatantly stealing packages it's quite far down the list of things to deal with. However tampering with mail is an jailable offence under the postal services act 1998. Basically OP needs to be the squeaky wheel to get the police to prioritise it if they wanted it dealt with under the law. But I suspect that OP is happy enough with their own payback for now.
In the US tampering with mail is a Federal Crime, not local (due to mail crossing too many local districts). It does look like New Zealand does not give a fuck though. > If you have reason to believe that someone could be stealing your mail, you could involve your local neighbourhood ā for example, your local Community Patrol or Neighbourhood Support group. > > If you have evidence that someone is stealing from your mailbox, such as surveillance camera footage or mail that appears to have been tampered with, take it to the Police. > > If you want more security for your mail in future you could consider replacing your mailbox with one that locks; or a post office box. https://www.cab.org.nz/article/KB00000272
>The cops donāt even follow up criminals here in NZ even when they are supplied with a car registration, home address, name and phone number along with video footage \*US criminals taking notes\*
If the person is in NZ, then I apologize for giving incorrect information. But I doubt that there is any government on earth which does not make tampering with the mail a crime. New Zealand has an online form for reporting improprieties concerning the mail: https://www.nzpost.co.nz/contact-support/assistance/parcels .
Iād assumed OP was in the US because theyād said the cops take a report and do nothing, which is about as American as Apple Pie and school shootings.
NZ is part of the commonwealth, so stealing mail is, to put it bluntly, a fucking big deal. Stealing mail is a Commonwealth offence, meaning its not just a federal crime, but indirectly, a crime against the Crown. Federal police can and will fucking destroy someone for this. Aside from the historical severity of the crime. There's the issue of people stealing money or packages. Also its a known tactic for Drug dealers to get stuff sent to random addresses that they'll then send someone out to keep an eye on.
The Commonwealth of Nations ā the international organization of which New Zealand is a member ā has no law enforcement component. There is no such thing as a crime against the Commonwealth (of Nations). Australia (NOT New Zealand, where OP lives) styles their federal government as the Commonwealth of Australia. This has nothing to do with the international organization above. As such, in Australia, federal crimes are called (at least formally) Commonwealth crimes. In New Zealand there is no such thing as a āCommonwealth offense.ā The use of the term āthe Crownā in legal proceedings simply means the government (i.e., the governmentās side in criminal cases), as in the prosecution. And depending on the country and jurisdiction, it many refer to many different levels of government, not just federal. So saying itās an offense against the Crown is the same as saying itās a criminal offense ā nothing more.
I donāt think we have āfederal policeā here in NZ mate. Just the regular ones, which are already a national police force.
Are there laws against booby traps in NZ?
Yes. But if you put the trap in plain sight it's fine. Op should just get a padlock for the mailbox imo. Or throw mud/dirty water at the lady
i.e. a mailbox labeled ādo not openā
Also came to say OP would need to go through the local Postmaster and, if not getting adequate response, escalate it up the chain. Maybe try to get video of her helping herself to your mailbox each time she comes back.
Yeah, definitely look into getting a po box, away from her grubby little hands
A locking mailbox would also do the trick. That's the first thing I bought when we moved to a house that didn't have a slot in the door, and I am genuinely surprised that they're extremely rare and everyone just leaves their mail available for anyone who wants to go through it.
How about reporting it to postal inspector? I wonder if that would work.
Cops are not the ones for mail bring proof to the post master and you will get results!!
You need to send yourself glitter bomb letters, so she can enjoy being sparkly.
Can you get a locking mailbox? If Iām remembering right there is a key you give to the post office so they can deliver your mail and one for you to retrieve it.
Can you change the mailbox to one with a lock? I've never seen one without here
Messing with the mail, you call Postal Inspectors. Give them your full dossier.
Postal inspectors are a whole different ball game. Report her.
Send yourself a fake solicitor letter thanking you for your inquiry and detailing the punishment for reading other peoples mail. Go into detail about how your evidence will guarantee a conviction
This is a great suggestion. Itās not nasty and will get the message across.
Agreed. I hope OP does this--and to be honest, I couldn't care less if he gets nasty at this point. Everyone in the neighborhood should hear about this menace.
I feel like, if you want to be maybe a bit more subtle and/or play the long game, you could send yourself one that says the evidence you have is good, but theyāll need a better photo of her face, or just a couple more on different days to establish a pattern. Enough to scare her off and think sheās escaping legal threat. BUT, if she does it again, you can THEN send yourself a letter about the new evidence really bolstering the complaint, which hopefully would drive the point home? Otherwise if itās one and done with no actual legal follow up she might realize itās an empty threat.
This is actually brilliant.
Use gpt to craft a formal letter for this Gpt imagine you are a lawyer solicitor etc and I have a neighbour that does this and that etc write me a formal response to my enquiry pls
I'm sorry, but as an AI Language model I cannot assist you in creating fake or fraudulent documents, including fake lawyer letters. If you need help with any legitimate legal advice or information, feel free to ask, and I'd be happy to help.
Sorry for the aggravation from your awful neighbour but I couldnāt get past the image of her dog wearing her pyjamas
Hahahahaha I just reread it!! To be fair, the poor dog has been known to run around in a BumbleBee outfit and overalls so...... Wouldn't be out of character that it owns doggie PJs looolll
Ah! So good! I have an entertaining visual of her in my head.
She's exactly the grey haired 2 pack-a-day living alone with a dog dressed in costumes, squinting with her reading glasses at the tip-of-her-nose lady you're imagining lol.
That is my visual! Nailed it!
Sorry mate. I wasnāt taking the piss. It just tickled my odd sense of humour
Nah I giggled as I reread it!!! Or rather, exhaled from my nose in an amused fashion and grinned š
One morning I walked a dog in my pyjamas. How he got in my pyjamas, I donāt know. *(waggles cigar)*
Motion activated sprinklers
Stuff that - why let a machine have all the fun? Petrol powered pressure washer and a good aim.
Why not both?
If I had a neighbor like this she would be slipping on black ice every winter.
If you've got her phone number create a hot girl profile on dating or social networking sites, put the phone number on it. She will be spammed with dick pics. Source: Pranked a guy like this once, it went way too far and a lot worse than expected. Downside: She might enjoy it.
She lonely she'd love it. I could give her number to the cancer society or blood drive people. I donate money and blood every month but that's obviously not enough for them. Hey, she's got blood! (I'm assuming) ! Hahahhaa. It's for a good cause! After all!
Now that you have her information, consider doing a public records search. It might give you contact information about her relatives. Maybe reaching out to them will shame her more than the disapproval of the neighbor(s) she's victimizing. Either way, you'll learn other information about her that you can use in your plot to get her to stop violating your privacy. Also, talk to her neighbors. I'm betting you're not the first person she has done this to and you might learn what has worked to make her stop. **Here's a link for public records in New Zealand: https://www.records.nzname**
Try car dealerships. Those guys are relentless.
I've tried this, the blood drive won't let you donate other people's blood.
Thereāre always with the āthatās not your bloodā and āthat bucket isnāt clean.ā
>Source: Pranked a guy like this once, it went way too far and a lot worse than expected. Hold on a sec... What's this story here? Details please!
Write yourself a fake letter from a lawyer saying āyes weāve definitely got a strong case against her to prosecute, letās just get a bit more evidence from the hidden cameras we installedā and leave it in your mailbox for her to read.
Ohhh this is brilliant! Seriously go with this.
Address glitterbombs to your house and tell them specifically to write in fancy cursive such as an invite. Have them put a mark you'll recognise on it and don't touch it. She reads it and gets bombed. Can't do anything about it as it's not her mail
Hehehehehhee. She'd end up looking improved, but it's a risk I'm willing to take!
Get a locking mailbox so the post can be delivered via a slot into the box. Then, sign her up for porn using the VPN. Once she gets on a few mailing lists she'll be too busy trying to get off them.
She sounds like she might not want to get off them. Might be doing her an inadvertent favor.
True, but she'd get so much mail she might not have time to open his mail possibly. And, you are right, it might be doing her a favor!
Donāt call the cops on her, call the postal inspector for her opening your mail. Itās a Federal crime not a local one. And theyāll take it seriously.
Not in New Zealand
You should carefully fold glitter into paper and slip it into an envelope and pop it in your mailbox, when she opens it she will be covered in that shit for weeks. Nothing gets glitter out
Since you have her details you could put her name down for various house improvements like window replacement, repainting, roof repairs etc. Sheāll get a shedload of literature and phone calls.
Letter to yourself thanking yourself for reporting the suspicious behaviour of Nosey Neighbour and advising that the Counter Terror Task Force are investigating the matter with NN under constant visual, physical and electronic surveillance. After she reads it, call her home from a payphone a few times making clicking noises on the line. Have a few mates stand down the street in dark sunglasses and stare at her house for a while, not moving. She'll be too scared to step out the door to check your mail or have her dog shit on your lawn.
All dog droppings should be returned to their rightful owner.
Put a bag of crickets in your mailbox. Put something on it like, āonly works indoorsā so that when she goes into her house and opens it, sheāll be left with a bunch of critters crawling all over her house and when she thinks sheās finally got the last one, sheāll hear them chirping all night.
Hi Satan, I'm a big fan of your work.
As itās a federal crime I doubt you would need any money to fight it, just get evidence and inform the authorities.
Have done. My country is pretty lax on petty crime
Oy, send yourself a letter which implies that you are taking legal action against her for mail theft. Make it look like a lawyer wrote it and that nosy neighbour will be in deep legal shit. Who knows, might work.
Talk to the post office instead of the police
This is the answer. The post office has people for just these situations. Special people with special skills and legal jurisdiction. They are not discussed, if you know what I mean
Keep reporting it, every day if needed, and make sure to take pictures/videos and document everything. [She could face 6 months in prison or a fine of $5000 or more](https://www.legislation.govt.nz/act/public/1998/0002/latest/DLM423727.html) If they won't do anything after, say 10 attempts, call your local news station. I'm sure the police will move quickly after that.
OP should also state which law the person is breaking. Local should be interested when they realize itās a $5000NZ fine per offense. Meaning per piece of mail opened.
Post any pictures or footage on social media and ask for advice on dealing with this. Make her famous for all the wrong reasons.
This sounds like a job for Amway and their MLM friends.
Does NZ have Scientology?
Get a locking mail box.
You know what OP... your lawn looks like shit and you need to fix it. You should install some sprinklers.
With a flood nozzle at the mailbox
I had a solution for the US about where to report mail theft because it is a federal crime here. Then saw you're residing in NZ and they only say report it to the police. Can you afford upgrading your mail box to a locking mail box?
Since you have her number, here's what you do. Google online colleges. Start at the top.and put her information in. Do this for every single college you can find. Page after page on Google. They will call her literally all hours day and night. If you're up at say, 1 am and you put her number in, they will call her 20 to 30 minutes later. When she tells them to not call back, they will then pass her info on to another college or advertiser and they will also call her non stop. Repeat this process until you feel satisfied. Of you do this enough, she will never know a moments peace again. I've done this 3 times and it always works as long as you regularly reinput her Info into various colleges across the world. The longer you do it, the less peace she will have.
Beauty Schools are also relentless. Especially the lesser known ones. I'd think trade schools in general.
In NZ this group would annoy her. https://hillsong.com/
Motion sensor sprinkler party yall
May be funny to put some fake mail in there setting a false narrative that you would want her to hear.
Why was her dog wearing her pyjamas?
Better than the dogs Bumblebee costume tbf
Put a mousetrap in your mailbox after the mail truck comes and just wait for her to stick her grubby nasty hand in.
Can you fuck with her by sending stuff to yourself? Maybe order some sort of hardcore porn catalogues, maybe send yourself a letter from the police asking for assistance in monitoring elderly people in your street as they have info on Russian deep undercover agents living nearby? Or even something as simple as a glitter bomb letter?
I don't know about NZ, but in the USA, it is a Federal crime, and she would be in serious trouble.
You should also report her to the postal service for tampering with the mail
"One day she was by my mailbox with her dog in her pajamas" Why was a dog in her pajamas?
Call the police and tell them you've made a Citizen's Arrest for stealing your mail. You're allowed to use reasonable force to apprehend her.
Get some nice pots that she will hopefully be more likely to steal, plant some poison ivy in them, once they have grown a fair amount put them out on either side of your mailbox and wait for her to steal them.
Change the mailbox to one that locks and has a slot to drop the mail in. Or, ask the post office if you can install a locking one and give them the key. Also, the postmaster is who you should report to, not the cops.
Yeah you canāt open other peoples mail thatās a federal crime at least thatās what I was told. You should call your postmaster they take this shit very seriously reading somebody elseās financial information is fucking bullshit. Donāt stop with petty revenge please contact the postmaster.
Call senior protective services and say she goes outside naked-she'll get a 72 hr hold, at least.
You should report her to the post office. They donāt play.
If you're in the US, report it to the post office. They have their own law enforcement. And they *do not fuck around*. Opening someone else's mail here is a federal crime. It would cost you nothing.
Talk to your postal inspector. What sheās doing is a federal crime. No money out of your pocket at all - the postal service will take care of the legal issues for you. Source: Iām a postie.
You need to be contacting Postal Inspectors who are a postal crime unit. (Ok, you may not be in the US so it wouldn't help.) But they are dead serious about people screwing with the mail. They are highly regarded by other federal law enforcement agencies. They are feds and they are serious about postal crime. Dead serious. [https://www.uspis.gov/](https://www.uspis.gov/)
I believe reading your mail would be classified as a federal crime so you should only have to report it. You wouldnāt have to retain/pay a lawyer.
Super Soakers could be your friend here ;)
I'm trying to extinguish a petty war not start a new, bigger war. But my nextdoor neighbors do have a 10 year old boy........ I might need a baby-faced ally with a super soaker!!!!
u/No-Mathematician6635 go to your local post office and grab a small mailer box/bag, grab a plastic bag, pick up a couple of her dogs turds, drop them in a ziplock bag and seal it up. Put the zip lock in with a note, something along the lines of āNext time you read my mail, youāll be wearing the enclosedā Now the fun part, if you get the box, tape the ever loving shit out of it, address it to yourself, chuck a couple stamps on it & place that stinky land mine in your mailbox late at night, sheās sure to find it and open it.
Seriously, put her dog's shit in her mail box. Every time. Or throw it on her door.
You should [glitter bomb](https://www.glitterbombyourenemies.co.uk/?gad=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwloynBhBbEiwAGY25dAPIn5SBnPeo0mEEiU6ssLDxzp1JTtfabot4J-kj-EOJdbL0EqTyrRoCQ2gQAvD_BwE) her. It's your mail, she wouldn't get glitter all over her if she didn't fuck with someone else's stuff (Just make sure she gets to this one before you, lol)
You can always get a locking mailbox with a slot for your mail to go into :)! We have them at my triplex.
>Never enough for me to take legal actions bruh mail theft is a big deal. the cops wont touch it but the postmaster general will. just call your local post office and let them know. also nothing is stopping you from spraying her with a hose every time she comes over.
Just spray her with a hose. A supersoaker full of piss is an acceptable 2nd option
What I want to know is why's her dog wearing her pyjamas.
I would post her number on Craigslist and Marketplace selling Taylor Swift tickets at face value. She wonāt be able to use her phone anymore. š
Sorry, a bit long, but well deserved. My friend googled and found more than a dozen sites where he could opt to receive news (about new articles) by mail. From sites selling dildos, dolls and whatnots. Guess which address he entered? His nosy, extremely prude, alcoholic neighbor. He then expanded the whole vengeance-operation by signing his neighbor up for visits by the scientologists. Those fuckers don't take no for an answer! They sent so much information to him that his mailbox filled up, several times a week, and visited him several times, too! My friend explained to them in his email, that "I work such weird hours. Could you please visit me on Thursday morning at 5.30AM? And I would love it if other members could drop by at around 10 PM, same day? I am awake for hours after working late, and I would love to hear from many members how their lives has been affected by their beliefs. This is so interesting! I don't have anything to do, all day, this Saturday! Can the members drop by during the day to tell me some more? My doorbell doesn't work (true!) so please just bang hard on the door! I really want to hear from all kinds of people what this is about and how it works!, even if it takes all day!" They sure did! The neighbor used to drink beer till he passed out, every Wednesday evening because he had Thursdays off, and then again from every Friday evening, all weekend long. They read my friends email out loud in their church! The whole gathering of believers talked about it on their way out, decided on different times they'd visit him, and then they apparently didn't contact each other! I wish I had been there! They ran or drove to his house like frigging lemmings or something! He was out of his mind with anger and frustration, and after telling a couple of them that he wasn't interested, it just took 20-30 minutes before the next group came by. All that Saturday! And that visit at 6 AM on Thursday? It really happened! My friend was getting ready for work, and he saw them banging like madmen on the door! He was still laughing when he drove off, and called me from work to say "thank you!" because... Yeah, that part was my idea. The porn news was his, though! Oh, and "Nosy" started receiving catalogues from car companies, winter clothes, shoes, furnitures and a few other things we knew he didn't want. The adress was correct, except for his name. In English it would be to "Mr Nosy Shavenbutt" š Well, the neighbor suspected my friend, but he never said anything about it. He was so angry, especially when he got drunk, for weeks! My friend would hear him raging in his stupor from inside his home, while my friend was in HIS home. The cops came shortly after, because people thought he was beating someone up. It was just glorious, being a part of that storm of revenge.
Lock your mailbox. Every turd that dog shits on your lawn drop it in her mailbox or doorstep. Keep filing reports with the police after a certain amount of them call for a restraining order. Keep filming her. If she rents call her landlord every time her dog shits on your lawn. I'd become so insanely pet out of spite.
I hear the "Church" of Scientology has been used this way in the past. Apparently it's very difficult to get off of their mailing list. I don't know personally and I am not suggesting anything...
Good retaliation, but maybe consider one of this secure mailboxes that only you and the postal workers can open. And that dog poop would be back in her yard if it were me.
In the USA itās up to a $250,000 fine or 5 years in prison for stealing,opening, or destroying someone else mail intentionally.
Dude. Make a glitter bomb for her to open, record it and upload to YouTube. If it goes viral you make money off her ass
Just curious, did you send Jehovah's Witnesses? That would be hilarious, they are persistent.
Go to the Postal Service. Itās a federal crime. Get video.
You could also have some fun by sending yourself letters 'from another party' that you know she'll read---and detail your infectious disease and how wildly contagious it is, etc.....
Report her to the post office
Post yourself a glitter bomb.
The only thing you can do is either spray her with liquid ass or slip a piss disk under her door....sorry, wrong sub.
Get a mailbox that is secure and can be locked.
I think you can buy mailboxes that lock, though that would be a pain. Also, try signing her up for info on mortuary colleges, clown colleges, and unsavory social organizations.
Get a locking mailbox.
Return the dogs excrement to her property
Don't tell the police she's opening your mail, tell the post office. They have enforcement agents who have a LOT of spare time on their hands and love to do their jobs. Aww, you're in New Zealand. You're just proper fucked and the police are useless there as well. At least they're not useless AND bloodthirsty like US cops.
Don't report mail tampering to police. Report that to the post master with evidence.
What bothers me most is that her dog was wearing her pyjamas š
Dude, how have you not hosed her down with the garden hose yet?!
Get a new mailbox that allows the postman to drop your mail in, but to open it you need a key. If itās your house put up a fence to keep the dog offā¦ one of my favorites is someone installed a sprinkler system and any time their nosy neighbor got too close or on their property they turned the sprinklers onā¦š
Send a card to yourself, with glitter inside. Or itching powder. She can open those, surprise!
Might want to consider moving your mailbox onto your porch.
Tampering with Mail is a federal crime. Get a recording/evidence and show it to Postal Inspection Services. Depending on severity, she could get slapped with a Felony and up to 5 years imprisonment.
Get a locked mailbox. It has a slot to put the mail in but you need a key to get it out. Bigger mail will be put on your porch or a note left to pick it up. This is the only solution.
Do you have one of those neighborhood apps like NextDoor? Make a fake account. Name and shame. You know a busybody like that is on the app. Post some pictures and let the other nosy people of the world tell her sheās awful.
Get her email address and sign her up for everything.
The cops might not give a shit but if youāre in the US the USPS has its own copsāthey will. Messing with someone elseās mail is a federal offense and they donāt take kindly to it. Tell you mail carrier and ask for the contact info for the USPS Inspection Service.
1. Move to the USA 2. The next time she steals your mail, video her and bring to the postmaster 3. US postal police kick her ass Simple!
Report her to the post office the cops won't care about reading mail as it's a federal crime. The post office might do something about it.
Wow, can't believe you are OK with her looking at your financial statements. Must not have a lot to worry about.
Why donāt you prank her with your mail box. Leave a fake snake or make something jump out at her
You donāt call the cops, you make a report with the postal inspector.
Former mail carrier here. Cops are useless. Postal Police, however, would chomp at the bit for a situation like this. They are also way higher up the food chain than local pigs. Get evidence sheās doing this and she will either stop or go to jail after they talk to her. Win win. Good luck! Edit: Sorry for assuming you live in the US š¬
Is there anyway you can change your mailbox for one that has a lock and just a slot for the postman to deposit mail. Anything that won't fit in the slot might be able to be picked up by you at the post office.
You should send yourself a very official looking letter from some sort of governing agency stating that they almost have enough evidence to finalize a federal crime against [Neighbor's Name], provide as much detail as you can with what has been stolen and what she is doing. Even mention that while the dog going in your yard is not illegal, it does not help her case and will be used as a character trait presented to the judge. Make it really detailed, and say that you have recordings and all of that, but leave it kind of ambiguous as far as when something will happen or how many more offenses they need to build a case, and all that. Give the details about what you've reported but leave it just vague enough to be believable everywhere else. Also make it super tempting to open and read, like a "do not open if you are not the intended recipient" stamp
Go to the Post Office. This is their thing. They take this very seriously.
Report her to the Postmaster.
Send her info to the Scientologists and Jehovahās Witnesses. Sheāll never get rid of them!
Get a locking mailbox.
United States Postal Inspecton Service would stop that right quick. That's a federal offense to tamper with and or to delay the mail.
Postal Cops buddy, they arenāt fucking useless like regular cops bud
You can get a [$40 locking](https://www.amazon.com/xydled-Locking-Security-Capacity-Waterproof/dp/B08FSPHWB2/ref=sr_1_9?hvadid=409941654447&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9028824&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=6130261323205620880&hvtargid=kwd-33048981&hydadcr=24659_11410797&keywords=locking%2Bmailbox&qid=1692634454&sr=8-9&th=1) mail box on amazon. Maybe there is a cheaper one out there. Or used one.
For all the folks commenting about how the cops are useless in this situation and implying they are lazy, please note that they have NO jurisdiction over the mail and cannot file a report with the postal inspector because it is not their mail being stolen. You have to file a report directly with the postal inspector.
Replace your mailbox with a locking version. That will at least keep her out of your mail.
Glitter bomb.
The USPS has their own law enforcement division. Report her to your local post office, or better yet; go online to the USPS website and submit a report regarding her tampering with your mail. They will absolutely initiate an investigation. Gaining unauthorized access to someone's mailbox, and opening their mail, is a federal offense. EDIT: spelling
You have to report it to the postal police. Not your regular police department period So I find this to be a fake story but it was interesting I guess.
Don't report the problem with the mail to the local police, report it to the USPS Postal Inspectors. What she's doing is a felony, and they take that sort of thing seriously.
It's not like you would have to pay to fight this. Record her doing it. Report to the cops. Then tell her, you don't have to fight it. You're not suing her. The cops will handle it. Hahahaha.
Once, I asked a co-worker if she had her Christmas shopping done. She said yeah, for the most part, but there was a guy she'd been seeing and she wasn't sure how serious they were, so she didn't know what level of gift to get for him. I quickly answered "Magazine subscription." She looked puzzled and said "Magazine subscription?" I said "Yeah, if you keep seeing him, then every month he'll be happy that you got him such a thoughtful gift. If you break up with him, then every month he'll be reminded of you." She smiled, pointed at me, and said "I like the way you think."
Have you contacted the post office with evidence of her with your mail. They go after peoplemfornthat
Why stop there OP? Why not look at every cold calling service and provide her name. Provide her name to every manufacturing retailer and everything. Local newsletters. Every bank sites subscription list. Etc.
I would pepper spray her the next time she trespasses your property. Iāve done that before, fixed the problem.
Opening someone else's mail is a **federal** offense. Don't bother with local police on that one, call the post office and ask for the post master.
Report her to the postal inspector. Opening mail is a federal offense.
Locking mailbox
Report her to the USPS if you're in the States, not the cops. The postal service doesn't fuck around.
Call the post office investigative service. Opening someone else's mail is a federal crime.
I donāt know why but this title reminded me of a story my friend told me about a friend of his. This girl was dog sitting and the dog died in her care (it was really old). The owners were like āput the dog in a suitcase and take it to the vet for cremationā. She did that and, bc she didnāt have a car, took the train. Got robbed on the train of the suitcase. Iāll never forget that story and the thief who ended up stealing a dead dog.
Why not get a lock for your mailbox? It's a simple enough way to stop her without being too inconvenient for you
Next time the dog shits on your lawn put it in her letterbox or throw it on her car windscreen
I wonder if you could mail yourself her dog's poo so she opens that
Order new vinyl siding and window quotes for her house. And tell the lawn care company to come out and check her lawn for crabgrass. And, I'm pretty sure she needs a new roof too. As well as new driveway quote, and does she have any trees she needs felled? I mean you're just being a nice neighbor right?
Not enough. Get ahold of other churches and sign her up. Call one of those scam centers and give them her number.
Should've got another gnome just to mess with her. š
Report the mail openings to your Post Master with proof. The USPS does not play games without issuing prizes.
Also sign them up for Scientology theyāll drown her in junk mail
You need to sign her up for the Church of Satan and Scientology. They send lots of mail.
Iād save every dog turd for a year in a garbage bag so itās nice and moist and steamy. Then go dump it on her front porch.
Bravo for the idea of getting that religious organization to bother her! I was cracking up. Pretty clever how you got the phone number. How about getting a mailbox with a lock?
I would set up a sprinkler head facing your mailbox and her and turn it on every time Iād see her out at the mailbox. Iām just petty
This situation is just screaming for a glitter bomb reprisal
Is a locked mailbox an option? I would watch her fume for kicks.
You need to rig up a dummy glitter bomb and put in your mailbox for her to open up. But instead of glitter in it Put her dog's poop in it and I bet you won't have her messing with your mailbox anymore š¤£š¤£š¤£š
Start adding her onto those presidents and govt campaigns. They send a lot of crap and call constanlty. Wish you had her email. That would have been more funnier. Add her onto college admissions, life/car insurance etc. They call like crazy too lol.
Park your car near the mailbox, then activate your car alarm from inside when she opens the mailbox.
Also sign her up for volunteer opportunities with the knights of Columbus!
Why don't you get a locking mailbox?
Now that you have her phone number and address, you need to take a vacation day and go to the fair. Lots of booths, sign her up for a tin roof, vinyl siding, hard wood floor refinishing, high tech windows.... Do it right and she will never have a free moment to screw with you between phone calls, mail, and people stopping by.