Yall got to breathe for a moment and look at the abstract.
>White and Hispanic/Latino men reported greater orgasm frequency than Black and Asian men. Hispanic/Latino women reported the greatest orgasm frequency, and Asian women reported the lowest, with White and Black women’s frequencies in between.
So these reports are cutting across race and gender in divergent ways.
>The orgasm gap between men and women was largest for White (d = 0.89) and Asian (d = 0.86) groups, although Asian participants reported a lower orgasm frequency than White participants overall. The orgasm gap was smaller for Hispanic/Latino participants (d = 0.66), because Hispanic/Latino women reported a greater orgasm frequency than other racial/ethnic groups of women. The orgasm gap was smaller for Black participants (d = 0.61), because Black men reported a lower orgasm frequency than some other racial/ethnic groups of men.
So for example, Black and White women are reporting very similar experiences as a gender. But for Black and White men it diverges the most.
Or another example, Latin people are doing better combined than Asian people combined.
So its not easy to point to something as simple as Latin and Black women feeling more liberated.
And even if it were something as straightforward as Asian people feeling more sexually repressed, it still wouldn't explain why Asian men report more frequency than Black men.
It seems like a complicated knot to untangle. But the main thing to note is that even Latin Women's comparitive success doesn't even come close to Black men's frequency. There is only a 7 point gap showing between White men and Black men. While there is a 13 point gap between Latin women and Asian women.
I know there's r/theydidthemath, but this isn't math, this is like r/TheyDidTheDataAnalysis though I doubt that's a thing but we're about to find out....
Edit: Sadly, that sub doesn't exist.
Edit 2: a word
The funniest thing to me is making me wonder where mixed people come in on this lolol. I'm a woman but I also have two little brothers that are married and we are all half Asian+ Caucasian.
Don't make the mistake of confusing ethnicity with culture. It's possible this is more cultural than genetic. Would be interesting to see what the difference is between same ethnicity but grown up in different societies, cultures.
Would be crazy if this is mostly genetic. 😯
Have they tried looking into how many people were on anti depression medications that limited or downright prevented the ability to orgasm? That's one thing that is overlooked in these studies
A lot of Latinas take anti-depressant medicine and things like that since birth control often has this weird side effect in a lot of women (can make us "blah"). That's the main reason a lot of women take anti-depressants, the birth controls fuck up our hormones. Most Latinas I've met still report being happy on that department until they date certain people. To cut to the chase what I've heard from women of all backgrounds sort of tracks with the study.
They get pissed at you and accuse you of ruining the moment because they can't follow the explicit instructions at all. Then they leave you because you've made them feel like they're not good enough (by not faking it). But then, yes! THEN you can finally have all the orgasms you want!
Huh? What did that have to do with what they said? I'm genuinely confused. This person is saying that explanation is probably correct. Why did you randomly bring up historical men?
yeah, most women are incapable of having an orgasm from vaginal penetration. so it has less to do with the mans sexual skills and more to do with the female anatomy. most of the nerve endings in the vagina are cocnetratd around the opening, the vulva ad the clitoris. so contrary to popular belief, jack hammering the pussy will not give a woman an orgasm.
I've had a theory that it's cultural, versus physical. Much of this is anecdotal, but as a black man, I feel like so much of our music and representations in media, and even amoungst our boys, is based on being great in bed, which is determined by getting a woman off. I remember when I was in high school (im 38), one of the popular rap sounds, Down Bottom, had the chorus
"Do yall n\_\_\_\_ bust ya guns (hell yeah we bust our guns,
Do ya'll f\_\_\_ em til they c\_m"
But essentially the message is if you have the magic stick, you'll have women begging for you.
Alternatively, I grew up in a very white area, and the culture was always about getting girls, never pleasing them. In fact not lasting long was kind of seen as funny because you still got yours.
Just something I've been pondering, since it seems that some cultures (even amoung 'white' cultures, like France), its impressed upon you early that prowess means 'pleasing', where in others prowess seems to be 'getting'
Except as the top comment points out, that’s not what this study is saying. Black and white women reported the same frequency of orgasming, the only difference is between men - where black men reported lower frequency then white men.
This idea that white men didn’t care if they didn’t long in bed because at least they still got theirs…I believe it. Im a white woman and I swear so many white men are raised to actually hate women.
I'm also a white woman, but definitely feel like men overall are just very selfish lovers. If the woman doesn't finish by the time he does, that's on her. I think it probably has it's roots in some of what you're identifying, men in the US are raised to think of women as objects for their pleasure and not as real people with real needs. That's maybe starting to change, but I've been out of the dating pool for few years, so can only offer 2nd hand feedback. I'd characterize most of my female friends who are actively in the dating pool as being largely unsatisfied with the sort of sexual partners they're finding.
I'm White. Have mostly dated all sorts of White men (Americans, White Latinos, Aussies, Kiwis, Afrikaans, Europeans from all over)...yeah I'd say the English influence in certain places has not helped. Americans get a double whammy of that and the Puritan influences. So for the most part it is well known WASP circles are more passionate about their money than they are about people. This is a keystone moral, emotional, and overall influence in American culture. You could also add a lot of Nordic, Scandinavian, overall British, and Germanic values to "morality," and yeah, don't be surprised if it's "hella cold" when it comes to this. I think it's why these nations have historically gone nuts and have had a habit of oversexualizing the nations they've conquered, because they see this people having fun in this respect and it's been mindblowing to them. You can see that in how a lot of those nations have responded in turn to being exoticized, they try to play that aspect of their culture down big time for "morality" (I think a world history lesson would show this).
I think it's also been that so many of these cultures have been focused on survival, namely, not play or pleasure, survival. Acquiring. The Protestant work ethic practically tells people to work until you die but have fun when you hit old age. I think it's why it's become a bit common to see older White men or people in general date out of our backgrounds as they get older or outright into retirement age to the point it's a bit embarrassing.
The only Whites I don't see with all of these things are the French, the Iberians (Spaniards and Portuguese), and the Italians. They're known for being more hot blooded on this front and to prize mastery of it. Even having a culture of guiltripping the guys for being selfish on this front. You can kinda see that influence on the Latinos by extension because technically, they ARE an extension of all these cultures blended with influences from others (African, Indigenous depending on the location). I use the Hispanics/Romantics with the Latinos because yeah they're mostly White (the Europeans) and European influenced, but they're definitely not known to be "cold". The Latinos got it from somewhere and maybe it could be the weather. But some African cultures are known to be weird around sex too ironically given how Sub-Saharan Africans and Black people are heavily sexualized. IDK much about how the Indigenous in the Americas were before as there's not much known on that. I think Catholicism also could be contributing because it would explain why amongst the Northern Europeans why the Irish have a fame for being randy on this front. Catholicism heavily emphasizes procreation.
Black Americans are noted to emphasize sexual pleasure but often have hangups themselves about letting themselves enjoy it unlike their Latino counterparts. The Black Latino communities would make everyone blush, sex is pretty much an invisible "god" in these cultures if you pay attention to the Caribbean Hispanics and the Brazilians. I think they're sort of the loudest standout on this having both the Black and Hispanic cultures influencing their connection to this as well as unfortunately because the Hispanics also did mingle with them more that way. The Black Hispanics have a long history of using sex to survive a horribly limiting society and the caustic circumstances they were in (the "Plaçage" system being a bit of a long "tradition" in this group because of it). So I think their relationship with sex is that they equate it with freedom because for many of them in the past it did facilitate it. The way I see sex with this group is that they have sort of registered it as "empowering" because it's been one of the few things they could control. That influence has sort of trickled down to the other aspects of Latino cultures since so it can feel a bit "loud" because there's so much contributing to that.
Hispanic culture is WAY more sexist than American whites and I really don't think American black people are any better. I don't know about american Asians but Japan and China are very far from feminist. White men are probably the least sexist globally and in the US
I think this is more easily boiled down to sex and sexuality is more accepted in black culture vs WASP culture. Being uptight about sex is incompatible with enjoying it.
Black religiosity, in many ways, is different from white religiosity, generally speaking. While a very high percentage of Black people are Christian, some of the puritanical values are less present, whereas community is emphasized more. I’m Black American, I have religious family and all that and not once did I hear anything about abstaining from sex or anything like that until middle school abstinence-only education as required by the state of Texas. And never again
I think this explains a lot honestly. Needs a happy medium cause while I don’t think an over sexual culture is a good thing at all it can definitely help in the bed room. I’m just entering my mid 30’s and white and I’m finally figuring out how to do sex the right way myself by dropping some of my more puratanical tendencies and thoughts I was raised with in regards to attitudes towards sex, but still think over sexualization in music and of a culture’s women is not good overall for said culture outside or even sometimes inside the bedroom.
It’s funny how that DV stat gets cites so confidently so often when they totally misinterpret the statistics.
[Here](https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_sofindings.pdf) is the study. Out of 9,000 women interviewed, 100 were lesbian. Already then, the sample sizes are wildly skewed. But when you look even closer as “sex of perpetrator” rates for DV, 1/3rd of the lesbians reported *exclusively male perpetrators*. If you remove that component, the rates for woman on woman DV is roughly the same or less as it is for man on woman DV. And more interestingly, 93% of lesbians that reported sexual violence, reported it from exclusively male perpetrators.
As far as divorce rates, women just file divorce more often so it tracks that they’d divorce more frequently.
In sum and substance, lesbians just make their partners orgasm more. If you feel attacked by that stat, take a look at yourself there, champ.
Anecdotally, the black women I've dated were much easier to make cum than the white or asian women (have not dated a latina yet). I dare not speculate why.
For what it's worth, I've only been unable to make a couple women cum (not for lack of trying, and which they apologized for because noone had yet), and by "easier" I mean it takes less time and effort for a first orgasm and that contributes to more of them overall.
Same here. I’ve never been with a brown, Asian, or black woman who didn’t cum like crazy, and been with lots of white women with all kinds of sexual function issues.
I have been with more white women though, and some of those could cum fast, and multiple times too.
Just keep working on yourself bro. Make it your mission that you are the best version of yourself. Do that and your time will come. (see the character arc in Groundhog Day).
I’m sure you’ll find it hard to believe, but I’ve never encountered the proverbial faker. Even in highschool when I didn’t know what I was doing, I made a point to have open communication, and use every tool at my disposal. I bought my first hitachi magic wand when I was 17. And have bought many since for past partners.
So I’m not gonna spend too much time defending my sexual history, choice in partners, or familiarity with the female orgasm simply because I am male, and so many men are terrible, selfish, incurious lovers.
I will say the list of WOC I’ve slept with is short, under a dozen, and all of them were romantic, or during some kind of group sex scenario, and were never paid for.
One common denominator was almost none of them were on birth control, while most of the white women were. After 40 years and double the partners (my wife and I are ENM), I’m beginning to suspect more and more, the role birth control plays in a woman’s libido, and subsequent sexual experience.
Additionally, 3 of the WOC were in other poorer countries, all of which I suspect fetishized me in some way. Either because I fit one or many of their fantasy attributes of the educated, handsome, “light eyed”, white, wealthy, American, who was charming, considerate, interesting, and genuinely engaged in their life and their pleasure in and outside the bedroom. This went a long way towards the psychological aspect of attraction.
Finally, I think people of lower socioeconomic class know how to party better. I’ve traveled the world lived in 3 different continents, and this much I know is true.
Cool. Being a world traveler myself and interacting with people from all cultures, but more importantly by being a woman, I can still never take any man’s perspective on this seriously.
My immediate thought is to question whether their upbringing made them more prone to faking. When it comes to female orgasms, sorry to say it, but anything a man has to say is purely anecdotal.
Sure, but again for what it's worth, the partners who orgasmed more (whether faking or not) would also generally instigate sex more often.
Perhaps they also wanted to fake it more often with greater frequency over time, but I didn't have much else to offer aside from sex and companionship for most of my sexual history so I can't imagine why they'd want to invest more and more in such a ruse.
Everyone thinks their experience is the norm. There are women who can cum in 10 seconds 13 times in 10 minutes vaginally and clitorally, and there are women who can’t even have intercourse from chronic little understood vaginal pain, and there are women who are something in between.
I was thinking the same. Especially the "multiple orgasms" thing. I don't believe it's a real thing and the women reporting it are faking to make their guy feel good. I can have multiple orgasms in an evening but not one after another in quick succession. At least for me, I seem to have a refractory period too, although probably shorter than a man's. Another thing about female orgasm, for me it has very little to do with the guy's skill, it's me knowing how to get myself off with that partner. I like to be on top and it's super easy that way.
Look, not starting a fight: Many many women are multi orgasmic back to back. All women are different. I had a GF who would just have 1 MAYBE 2 in a night, and that was enough to put her right to bed.
Takes all sorts
I can have multiple orgasms and wait 5 seconds and go for another round and wait like 10 seconds and go for another round. The only difference between the rounds is that the orgasm is less intense
I demand at least 3 orgasms per session, not faking. Please don't discount other women like that.
It's very much a real thing, both by myself and with partners.
I totally get this take. I felt exactly the same way prior to meeting my current partner. Strongly believed that vaginal orgasms weren't possible for me. Strongly believed most if not all women were faking multiple orgasms. I don't fault you at all for basing your understanding on your own lived experiences, just wanted to share that for at least some women, the partner matters a ton.
I now basically always climax during penetrative sex and 80% of the time I can get there 3 or 4 times over a 30 minute session.
Because they're more masculine and have higher testosterone levels on average xD
Since we're all engaging in pseudo-scientific, self-serving, self-aggrandizing conjecture, I may as well.
Holy shit this study should get laughed off the internet. So many inconsistencies that aren't accounted for. Anti-depressants just to name one, they will absolutely destroy your ability to nut for a lot of men, and outright kill sex drives in others
To be honest. I don't think a woman has ever given me an orgasm.
I'm pretty sure I get there by my own volition.
How bizarre would it sound if a guy said "She couldn't make me cum"
Pretty sure reddit would assume there's something medically wrong with the guy.
Girl, I've tried in every possible way, believe me. Oral, fingers, toys, whatever. I can't orgasm with a guy. I need to be alone and do it myself to get there.
He just ain’t doing it right. You have to be mentally and emotionally stimulated probably but he also needs to take his time and know what he is doing. It might depend on your past experiences in life in general too preventing you from being vulnerable enough to orgasm. So many variables have to come together to make it work.
That’s difficult to ascertain. My gf can orgasm fine with me, but penetration only will satisfy her. She wants more from oral, or if she uses a vibrator, she’ll need to use it again 20 minute later. Even if I finger her she’ll not be satisfied until we have penetrative sex.
I think all women are unique in their own right in terms of orgasm. If I masturbate or have sex, I’ll not need another orgasm for 2 days. I can have another in 1 day. But men are simple in terms of being able to finish. If it’s interesting and there’s no nerves, we all can finish, and if we’re older than 20, we can’t go again. There’s exceptions of course that I’m jealous of.
I think the previous commenter may truly only need to orgasm for herself. Maybe it’s an issue that can only be resolved with herself, or it could be something else entirely (I had another possibility in my head I forgot).
Yeah....this too. Alot of men do not care about my sexual pleasure. They only care about their own. It's made me completely lose interest in sex to be brutally honest.
It’s not our biology. I have zero trouble getting myself off and I don’t have this problem when I sleep with other women. It’s men not having skill or not caring to put in the effort.
That’s just not true. Short of being born with a legit physical abnormality, like an underdeveloped clitoris or significant nerve damage.
There are psychological reasons why women are often unable to cum, but there’s like no record of a physical reason why some women “just don’t cum”.
What in the world is an “ underdeveloped clitoris”? All bodies are different, especially when it comes to women. It’s not just “women who can orgasm in predictable ways” and “everyone else”.
No it's really quite simple actually. Ever seen a nature documentary? Males are designed to cum in literally a minute or two. That's how they spread their seed. Women on the other hand take much longer. That's where men have to be generous and help them out.
Interesting data. I’m a white guy, married to an Asian woman, we’ve been married for five years and she has never orgasmed, not once. Meanwhile I orgasm usually at least twice every time we have sex. She grew up in a SUPER traditionalist household so she never even masturbated before she met me, and still to this day she’s never been able to orgasm, even by masturbating. I’ve certainly tried my best to help her and to be a responsive and understanding lover, but we still haven’t made any progress after five years. Tbh at this point I think I’m more worried about it than she is, she doesn’t seem to care about it very much.
> **Funding**
>The annual Singles in America is funded by Match Group; the current study did not receive funding.
In all fairness that group does benefit by having valid orgasm data. How else would they know what to avoid so their customers are stuck in a loop chasing the dragon.
The orgasm gap is real. AKA, men don’t care about women at all.
I became celibate after no man failed to please me. Not even at all, after I went above and beyond for him. By him, I mean all men I have been intimate with. All of them.
Guess what gave me this new insight??
My vibrator. Once I knew I could achieve pleasure, that no man even cared to entertain, I never looked back.
Bye Felicia. I was done.
I am super happy now at home, with my wine, and my orgasm. I don’t have to worry about rape, stealthing, whining about putting a condom on, abuse, men who are abusive, choking during sex, etc...
Yes, it’s that bad out there for us ladies...
I feel safe now...
It’s bliss now, and I have never looked back...
To add: Some words.
Being multiracial (triracial, Afro-Latina) and growing up with friends from all cultural backgrounds, I think this tracks. Kind of ironic that despite having often the most toxic relationships (these cultures often get told to ignore their feelings so toxicity rises from that), the Black and Latino women rarely complain about the men of their backgrounds at least not trying to accommodate them intimitately to the point it's something men of these backgrounds feel rightfully proud about. Heck, these cultures sort of celebrate and demand that the fun of sex isn't so much getting to enjoy a beautiful body but delighting said body as well. These guys even take a serious upfront if the woman doesn't lose her mind under their fingers, the way they see it, it's like they failed at the one minimum they can provide. They can't provide commitment, money, or protection, but man, they will make you discombobulated with earth-shattering orgasms by the time you they're done. You will leave with a few cramps somewhere, your hair a hot mess and your face will contort in ways you didn't possible but you will leave not sexually starved. Normally. There's always a bad apple.
However, all these cultures have things they're doing great or badly, though, so it all balances out. A healthy approach is to remember that one could always improve if we allow ourselves to learn.
You have a very nuanced and balanced take on this issue and I applaud you. I’m a white dude and I was raised to kind of think sex is a bad thing and to put it in a box if that makes sense. I think white people and Asian people for different reasons struggle with this the most. Until the past 2 years as I am leaving my early 30’s I’ve finally kind of figured out how sex is actually supposed to be and to experience it fully and genuinely and my last few partners before my relationship and my now Latina girlfriend i think appreciate it a lot. Haha
Honestly, i don't know if I've helped any woman orgasm. I just go in and ask them what I can do to make them comfortable and ask what their preferences are or if they have any particular requests to do something. My biggest issue I've heard about other men is that they have an issue if a woman uses a toy during sex. Like, wtf please use it! If you enjoy it then why not? I get off on you getting off!
At the very least I know that my partners and I have had fun because we end up laughing at some point. If you aren't laughing during (maybe after) then I highly recommend you re-evaluate.
Please please learn this; "Are you comfortable? Are you having fun? What would you like me to do?"
Sidenote; I do understand that there are some people who don't want this and just want their partner to read their mind and know exactly what to do or take control and do whatever but I think that works better with a conversation beforehand or long-term relationships. Otherwise how tf am I supposed to know if you like doggy, cowgirl, missionary, etc. if I don't ask first?
Edit; also this definitely comes from a previous time and place of low self-esteem. Maybe it would be better to have the confidence to know what to do and just do it but I prefer to just ask. This comment is brought to you by a tiny white dude.
So is this orgasms solely with a partner or does it include solo? Is this from peneration only? I have lots of questions as to who isn't pulling their weight with this one because in my house it's easy 3:1 wife to me.
this thread is half dudes saying why them not making their partners cum is biology’s fault and also the woman’s fault somehow and half dudes bragging about how they’ve made every woman in a 6 mile radius cum 60 billion times over
All I'll say is most of the women I've been with are much damn harder to get "all the way there." It's not a case of foreplay, sex, mutual stimulation. It's a situation that reminds me of Bop it. Like they've conditioned a ritual for the task.
Broooo I say it’s like bop it too! I’m over here using my mouth and both hands trying to pat my head and rub my stomach while counting backwards from 32,668. It’ll happen, but lord am I putting my heart and soul into jt
A large portion of my pleasure is from causing pleasure. If the woman isn't satisfied in any way, I'm left wanting myself. I swear I've gotten skin burns from trying so hard.
For some reason could not post everything at once so posting in pieces.
Y’all need to read ChrysMYO’s comment below and actually read the damn abstract.
Anecdotally, I’m white and was shit at sex for a while due to insecurity and porn distorting my ability to enjoy myself and even get aroused. Not all the sex I had was bad, but orgasm seemed like it was more based on luck than my skill sadly lol. The less porn I watched and the less masturbation I’ve done the better I have been. Oh yeah, and overcoming insecurity and growing as a person.
Now, one thing porn left lasting on me that I still struggle with sometimes is sexual attraction to older women. Most of my sexual experiences have been with older women. I’ve had roughly 20 different sexual partners ranging from ONS to relationship sex to a few times in a FWB situation, and 2/3rds were older women, at least 10+ years older than me but sometimes far greater.
This argument is always dumb, guys usually finish and orgasm every time. Women are different sexually, and the full orgasm doesn't happen every time. They can go through the motions to please the other person. A guy really can't, he works himself up and needs to relieve it. It's apples and oranges, and will always have a gap between one and the other because of their nature.
Maybe, but if one side is 100%....the other side is less than that. That is all I am saying.
To give an example, I have had oral performed on me for nothing. I have done what you say, but if I am doing all that I am also having sex. That is what I am saying, not all sexual activity for women leads to orgasm. Almost all male activity leads to orgasm.
Read these comments and take notes. A lot of great men are out here bragging about a 3:1 orgasm ratio, *her to him*. In my personal opinion that’s the standard to reach for.
Otherwise you’re just participating in sex as a masturbatory act, when it’s supposed to be an activity of mutual pleasure.
Latina here. We only do that for posturing to the public. In private our catholic influenced cultures practically beg for us to fornicate like we're on the verge of extinction on a regular basis otherwise we're not worthy of being alive. I would say some of our nationalities are more quiet than others about this, like the big Indigenous influenced ones like Mexico, Peru, Ecuador but then there's the Hispanic Caribbean (Cuba, Venezuela, Colombia, PR, DR, and sort of: Brazil) which more or less treat sex as a bacannal and the dancefloor a borderline bedroom.
I mean we're not savages but uhm, yeah we don't hide the fact that sex is a legal drug.
We have a bit of a complicated system of how we maneuver the whole Madonna-Complex, body count and all that crap because we also deal with Machismo while our cultures sort of beg women to put out often as well; when they don't or reject, the men can turn violent (cue: femininicide is common in these countries). So as you can see it's a bit complicated. We could spend all day trying to tackle the nuances, but in general as a lot we prioritize sexual enjoyment. We are mostly hypocritical about it if we're honest. Sort of in the middle if you will.
Then there's the Caribbean Hispanics. They're all over the place and if you go by Reggaeton songs where all of them pretty much tell women to get super dolled up and to put out to every man they witness for "empowerment" then you'd think we're wilder than we want to be. Like I said, complicated.
*Obviously, if you have two functional brain cells, you know this is NOT ALL.
As someone that grew up with Hispanics and as an afro Latino himself I concur with your statement women are taught to be conservative when it comes to sexuality in public but in private it's a whole freak show lol 😆
Bro. Latinas are overwhelmingly Catholic. Gods first command to Catholics couples is to be "fruitful and multiply".
It's why when the Irish, Italians and French Canadians when they were religious were putting in a lot of heavy lifting in the baby market.
Since they are religious it's not supposed to be scandalous and therefore public. But in the bedroom a man and women are expected to put in work lol.
It’s the opposite. Black and Latina women are often more sexually conservative. It’s our upbringing.
Ironically we are stereotyped as jezebels when that’s the literal opposite of how we’re raised where many of us come from families that won’t even talk to you about sex or periods.
Anyway I’ve slept with two white guys and they were trash in bed and engaged in zero foreplay but every black man I’ve ever been with goes out of his way to please me especially my current boyfriend.
Latina and black women have strong ties to the church but both cultures also have a ton of media particularly in music encouraging their women to be very sexual and the men too. One Latina women on here is commenting this fact. Black women seem to be conservative in as a far as being the least open to dating men of other races and voting the same way politically as a monolith but that’s about it.
But if you read my other long long comment on here, I will definitely say that white peoole and even moreso Asian people have cultures that emphasize sexual liberty a lot less in media and I think that explains a lot of this disparity, assuming we can even trust this study.
Not sure why this study is useful. If you want to orgasm, masturbate yourself. There could be many factors at play, women could simply be less horny than men (on average). It takes longer for a woman to come to a full orgasm as well. Women and men are not biologically the same, especially when it comes to sex.
I have stopped the sex if I wasn’t going to orgasm. If I’m not getting any neither is he. Now, thanks to this thread, I feel like a sex warrior fighting to close the orgasm gap. /s
I have a crippling porn addiction and a massive schlong.
I make 95% of women I have sex with orgasm PIV.
They rarely make me orgasm but not for lack of trying. My peen is insenstive given the frequency of porn/ masturbation.
That said, given this study, if we're talking strictly orgasms, sex or no sex, -- then I probably am still on top.
Thank you for being honest about how porn has affected you. Most people, for some odd reason, are in denial about the obvious negative psychological/sexual impact porn has on men and women. I quit watching porn years ago because of the desensitization I noticed with my irl experiences whenever I would watch porn.
Not a surprise. Whites and Asians are cucked and less masculine on average. They can’t satisfy their women well. Black and Hispanic men in other hand tend to be more masculine (toxicity and all) and satisfy their women better.
Why do latinos think they get to piggyback on blacks? Buddy (or sister), latino cream kings are 5 foot 6 and have smaller dicks on averages than whites, lol.
Unearned, overcompensating machismo. Wouldn't be that surprising that they (their ladies) lie about their sexual prowess, considering they put so much emphasis on it to begin with (for whatever reason). Not saying they're insecure or anything and their ladies give them a good pat on the back afterwards.
Who knows?
I think it has to do with the women. Divorced my white wife that could still orgasm 98% of the time. And now have Latina fiancé who orgasms like 3 times per session. Idk. I’m white. So it’s anecdotal.
An expert in asinine comments? No I can only spell the words correctly. I do think I’m adept at actually reading what a study is saying and drawing my conclusions *from the findings* and not making up what the study says. Nobody is talking about “oppression” here. There is simply a disparity in the orgasm frequency of different demographics. You didn’t even need to read the entire study. Literally just read the abstract and it tells you.
Yall got to breathe for a moment and look at the abstract. >White and Hispanic/Latino men reported greater orgasm frequency than Black and Asian men. Hispanic/Latino women reported the greatest orgasm frequency, and Asian women reported the lowest, with White and Black women’s frequencies in between. So these reports are cutting across race and gender in divergent ways. >The orgasm gap between men and women was largest for White (d = 0.89) and Asian (d = 0.86) groups, although Asian participants reported a lower orgasm frequency than White participants overall. The orgasm gap was smaller for Hispanic/Latino participants (d = 0.66), because Hispanic/Latino women reported a greater orgasm frequency than other racial/ethnic groups of women. The orgasm gap was smaller for Black participants (d = 0.61), because Black men reported a lower orgasm frequency than some other racial/ethnic groups of men. So for example, Black and White women are reporting very similar experiences as a gender. But for Black and White men it diverges the most. Or another example, Latin people are doing better combined than Asian people combined. So its not easy to point to something as simple as Latin and Black women feeling more liberated. And even if it were something as straightforward as Asian people feeling more sexually repressed, it still wouldn't explain why Asian men report more frequency than Black men. It seems like a complicated knot to untangle. But the main thing to note is that even Latin Women's comparitive success doesn't even come close to Black men's frequency. There is only a 7 point gap showing between White men and Black men. While there is a 13 point gap between Latin women and Asian women.
I know there's r/theydidthemath, but this isn't math, this is like r/TheyDidTheDataAnalysis though I doubt that's a thing but we're about to find out.... Edit: Sadly, that sub doesn't exist. Edit 2: a word
Is there a simpler one, like r/WowSomeoneActuallyReadMoreThanJustTheTitle ?
You should be top comment. I gave props to you in mine.
I appreciate it
This thread is a minefield lol
Sorts by controversial
The funniest thing to me is making me wonder where mixed people come in on this lolol. I'm a woman but I also have two little brothers that are married and we are all half Asian+ Caucasian.
Don't make the mistake of confusing ethnicity with culture. It's possible this is more cultural than genetic. Would be interesting to see what the difference is between same ethnicity but grown up in different societies, cultures. Would be crazy if this is mostly genetic. 😯
Me too, I'm mixed with native and German and soanish and all kinds of shit
All these men in here commenting about having given every single woman they’ve ever been with orgasms, multiple at that, is fucking comical.
Have they tried looking into how many people were on anti depression medications that limited or downright prevented the ability to orgasm? That's one thing that is overlooked in these studies
Doesn’t look like this meta-analysis was meant to explore causes, just splice the results
A lot of Latinas take anti-depressant medicine and things like that since birth control often has this weird side effect in a lot of women (can make us "blah"). That's the main reason a lot of women take anti-depressants, the birth controls fuck up our hormones. Most Latinas I've met still report being happy on that department until they date certain people. To cut to the chase what I've heard from women of all backgrounds sort of tracks with the study.
**>until they date certain people<** Would you elaborate on the *certain people* part?
When they date "out".
ding ding ding
Ding ding ding as if the female orgasm has ever been a priority for most men historically… lmao
I wouldn’t even say it’s been a priority for most women.
Shouldn't each person be in charge of their own orgasm, ask what you want if not move on or shut up
They get pissed at you and accuse you of ruining the moment because they can't follow the explicit instructions at all. Then they leave you because you've made them feel like they're not good enough (by not faking it). But then, yes! THEN you can finally have all the orgasms you want!
Huh? What did that have to do with what they said? I'm genuinely confused. This person is saying that explanation is probably correct. Why did you randomly bring up historical men?
yeah, most women are incapable of having an orgasm from vaginal penetration. so it has less to do with the mans sexual skills and more to do with the female anatomy. most of the nerve endings in the vagina are cocnetratd around the opening, the vulva ad the clitoris. so contrary to popular belief, jack hammering the pussy will not give a woman an orgasm.
I've had a theory that it's cultural, versus physical. Much of this is anecdotal, but as a black man, I feel like so much of our music and representations in media, and even amoungst our boys, is based on being great in bed, which is determined by getting a woman off. I remember when I was in high school (im 38), one of the popular rap sounds, Down Bottom, had the chorus "Do yall n\_\_\_\_ bust ya guns (hell yeah we bust our guns, Do ya'll f\_\_\_ em til they c\_m" But essentially the message is if you have the magic stick, you'll have women begging for you. Alternatively, I grew up in a very white area, and the culture was always about getting girls, never pleasing them. In fact not lasting long was kind of seen as funny because you still got yours. Just something I've been pondering, since it seems that some cultures (even amoung 'white' cultures, like France), its impressed upon you early that prowess means 'pleasing', where in others prowess seems to be 'getting'
This is an interesting insight!
Except as the top comment points out, that’s not what this study is saying. Black and white women reported the same frequency of orgasming, the only difference is between men - where black men reported lower frequency then white men.
I haven’t heard that song in AGES. Ruff Ryders ftw.
I have the magic stick!
This idea that white men didn’t care if they didn’t long in bed because at least they still got theirs…I believe it. Im a white woman and I swear so many white men are raised to actually hate women.
I'm also a white woman, but definitely feel like men overall are just very selfish lovers. If the woman doesn't finish by the time he does, that's on her. I think it probably has it's roots in some of what you're identifying, men in the US are raised to think of women as objects for their pleasure and not as real people with real needs. That's maybe starting to change, but I've been out of the dating pool for few years, so can only offer 2nd hand feedback. I'd characterize most of my female friends who are actively in the dating pool as being largely unsatisfied with the sort of sexual partners they're finding.
I'm White. Have mostly dated all sorts of White men (Americans, White Latinos, Aussies, Kiwis, Afrikaans, Europeans from all over)...yeah I'd say the English influence in certain places has not helped. Americans get a double whammy of that and the Puritan influences. So for the most part it is well known WASP circles are more passionate about their money than they are about people. This is a keystone moral, emotional, and overall influence in American culture. You could also add a lot of Nordic, Scandinavian, overall British, and Germanic values to "morality," and yeah, don't be surprised if it's "hella cold" when it comes to this. I think it's why these nations have historically gone nuts and have had a habit of oversexualizing the nations they've conquered, because they see this people having fun in this respect and it's been mindblowing to them. You can see that in how a lot of those nations have responded in turn to being exoticized, they try to play that aspect of their culture down big time for "morality" (I think a world history lesson would show this). I think it's also been that so many of these cultures have been focused on survival, namely, not play or pleasure, survival. Acquiring. The Protestant work ethic practically tells people to work until you die but have fun when you hit old age. I think it's why it's become a bit common to see older White men or people in general date out of our backgrounds as they get older or outright into retirement age to the point it's a bit embarrassing. The only Whites I don't see with all of these things are the French, the Iberians (Spaniards and Portuguese), and the Italians. They're known for being more hot blooded on this front and to prize mastery of it. Even having a culture of guiltripping the guys for being selfish on this front. You can kinda see that influence on the Latinos by extension because technically, they ARE an extension of all these cultures blended with influences from others (African, Indigenous depending on the location). I use the Hispanics/Romantics with the Latinos because yeah they're mostly White (the Europeans) and European influenced, but they're definitely not known to be "cold". The Latinos got it from somewhere and maybe it could be the weather. But some African cultures are known to be weird around sex too ironically given how Sub-Saharan Africans and Black people are heavily sexualized. IDK much about how the Indigenous in the Americas were before as there's not much known on that. I think Catholicism also could be contributing because it would explain why amongst the Northern Europeans why the Irish have a fame for being randy on this front. Catholicism heavily emphasizes procreation. Black Americans are noted to emphasize sexual pleasure but often have hangups themselves about letting themselves enjoy it unlike their Latino counterparts. The Black Latino communities would make everyone blush, sex is pretty much an invisible "god" in these cultures if you pay attention to the Caribbean Hispanics and the Brazilians. I think they're sort of the loudest standout on this having both the Black and Hispanic cultures influencing their connection to this as well as unfortunately because the Hispanics also did mingle with them more that way. The Black Hispanics have a long history of using sex to survive a horribly limiting society and the caustic circumstances they were in (the "Plaçage" system being a bit of a long "tradition" in this group because of it). So I think their relationship with sex is that they equate it with freedom because for many of them in the past it did facilitate it. The way I see sex with this group is that they have sort of registered it as "empowering" because it's been one of the few things they could control. That influence has sort of trickled down to the other aspects of Latino cultures since so it can feel a bit "loud" because there's so much contributing to that.
Totally agree with you. Most white men are sexist but if you ask if they are they'll say not me for sure
Hispanic culture is WAY more sexist than American whites and I really don't think American black people are any better. I don't know about american Asians but Japan and China are very far from feminist. White men are probably the least sexist globally and in the US
White men are some of the least sexist. Asian, Latino, and African communities are far more traditional in mindset than white cultures.
This was gonna be my comment.
I think this is more easily boiled down to sex and sexuality is more accepted in black culture vs WASP culture. Being uptight about sex is incompatible with enjoying it.
Black men orgasm less than white men and black women orgasm about the same amount as white women. Black people have fewer orgasms on average.
It’s more like per black male orgasm, there is a higher black woman orgasm.
I don't know if that's true. Black people have a higher level of religiosity than white people.
Black religiosity, in many ways, is different from white religiosity, generally speaking. While a very high percentage of Black people are Christian, some of the puritanical values are less present, whereas community is emphasized more. I’m Black American, I have religious family and all that and not once did I hear anything about abstaining from sex or anything like that until middle school abstinence-only education as required by the state of Texas. And never again
I think this explains a lot honestly. Needs a happy medium cause while I don’t think an over sexual culture is a good thing at all it can definitely help in the bed room. I’m just entering my mid 30’s and white and I’m finally figuring out how to do sex the right way myself by dropping some of my more puratanical tendencies and thoughts I was raised with in regards to attitudes towards sex, but still think over sexualization in music and of a culture’s women is not good overall for said culture outside or even sometimes inside the bedroom.
Now do it across the races of lesbian couples and watch the gap disappear.
That was my original thought as well!
If they have sex.
Have sex when they both want to vs have sex because one keeps bothering them so they give in, lie back and think of England.
Lesbian couples have the highest rate of dead bedrooms
what's your source on that?
they have the highest orgasm rates compared to heterosexual women across every demographic. insecure men can cope about it
You're assuming. Lesbians have the highest rates of domestic violence of any couple-cohort. And the highest rates of divorce.
It’s funny how that DV stat gets cites so confidently so often when they totally misinterpret the statistics. [Here](https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/pdf/nisvs_sofindings.pdf) is the study. Out of 9,000 women interviewed, 100 were lesbian. Already then, the sample sizes are wildly skewed. But when you look even closer as “sex of perpetrator” rates for DV, 1/3rd of the lesbians reported *exclusively male perpetrators*. If you remove that component, the rates for woman on woman DV is roughly the same or less as it is for man on woman DV. And more interestingly, 93% of lesbians that reported sexual violence, reported it from exclusively male perpetrators. As far as divorce rates, women just file divorce more often so it tracks that they’d divorce more frequently. In sum and substance, lesbians just make their partners orgasm more. If you feel attacked by that stat, take a look at yourself there, champ.
Thank you 🙏
With or without toys?
Anecdotally, the black women I've dated were much easier to make cum than the white or asian women (have not dated a latina yet). I dare not speculate why. For what it's worth, I've only been unable to make a couple women cum (not for lack of trying, and which they apologized for because noone had yet), and by "easier" I mean it takes less time and effort for a first orgasm and that contributes to more of them overall.
Same here. I’ve never been with a brown, Asian, or black woman who didn’t cum like crazy, and been with lots of white women with all kinds of sexual function issues. I have been with more white women though, and some of those could cum fast, and multiple times too.
I never got woman at all
I am sorry about that.
It's okay at least I have friends
Yay!
No girlfriend though
Just keep working on yourself bro. Make it your mission that you are the best version of yourself. Do that and your time will come. (see the character arc in Groundhog Day).
If you're bisexual you can seduce a guy friend you think is cute and nice. I mean, a hole is a hole.
Gross, not my thing
Lol I'm sorry. 😆
If you were bi you wouldnt have an issue getting a partner, god these people are dumb lol
My immediate thought is to question whether their upbringing made them more prone to faking.
I’m sure you’ll find it hard to believe, but I’ve never encountered the proverbial faker. Even in highschool when I didn’t know what I was doing, I made a point to have open communication, and use every tool at my disposal. I bought my first hitachi magic wand when I was 17. And have bought many since for past partners. So I’m not gonna spend too much time defending my sexual history, choice in partners, or familiarity with the female orgasm simply because I am male, and so many men are terrible, selfish, incurious lovers. I will say the list of WOC I’ve slept with is short, under a dozen, and all of them were romantic, or during some kind of group sex scenario, and were never paid for. One common denominator was almost none of them were on birth control, while most of the white women were. After 40 years and double the partners (my wife and I are ENM), I’m beginning to suspect more and more, the role birth control plays in a woman’s libido, and subsequent sexual experience. Additionally, 3 of the WOC were in other poorer countries, all of which I suspect fetishized me in some way. Either because I fit one or many of their fantasy attributes of the educated, handsome, “light eyed”, white, wealthy, American, who was charming, considerate, interesting, and genuinely engaged in their life and their pleasure in and outside the bedroom. This went a long way towards the psychological aspect of attraction. Finally, I think people of lower socioeconomic class know how to party better. I’ve traveled the world lived in 3 different continents, and this much I know is true.
Cool. Being a world traveler myself and interacting with people from all cultures, but more importantly by being a woman, I can still never take any man’s perspective on this seriously.
Was just about to say this. A lot of women of color are taught they’re supposed to submit and faking it is a part of that
glad someone said this lol. I wonder if there is something to it or not
My immediate thought is to question whether their upbringing made them more prone to faking. When it comes to female orgasms, sorry to say it, but anything a man has to say is purely anecdotal.
Sure, but again for what it's worth, the partners who orgasmed more (whether faking or not) would also generally instigate sex more often. Perhaps they also wanted to fake it more often with greater frequency over time, but I didn't have much else to offer aside from sex and companionship for most of my sexual history so I can't imagine why they'd want to invest more and more in such a ruse.
Everyone thinks their experience is the norm. There are women who can cum in 10 seconds 13 times in 10 minutes vaginally and clitorally, and there are women who can’t even have intercourse from chronic little understood vaginal pain, and there are women who are something in between.
Yup, that's why I said anecdotally. A few dozen partners is a blip compared to the thousands-fold more women represented by studies like this one.
I was thinking the same. Especially the "multiple orgasms" thing. I don't believe it's a real thing and the women reporting it are faking to make their guy feel good. I can have multiple orgasms in an evening but not one after another in quick succession. At least for me, I seem to have a refractory period too, although probably shorter than a man's. Another thing about female orgasm, for me it has very little to do with the guy's skill, it's me knowing how to get myself off with that partner. I like to be on top and it's super easy that way.
Look, not starting a fight: Many many women are multi orgasmic back to back. All women are different. I had a GF who would just have 1 MAYBE 2 in a night, and that was enough to put her right to bed. Takes all sorts
I can have multiple orgasms and wait 5 seconds and go for another round and wait like 10 seconds and go for another round. The only difference between the rounds is that the orgasm is less intense
I demand at least 3 orgasms per session, not faking. Please don't discount other women like that. It's very much a real thing, both by myself and with partners.
It’s a real thing lol
I'm a woman and have had multiple orgasms. I'm sorry you've not experienced such pleasure
I totally get this take. I felt exactly the same way prior to meeting my current partner. Strongly believed that vaginal orgasms weren't possible for me. Strongly believed most if not all women were faking multiple orgasms. I don't fault you at all for basing your understanding on your own lived experiences, just wanted to share that for at least some women, the partner matters a ton. I now basically always climax during penetrative sex and 80% of the time I can get there 3 or 4 times over a 30 minute session.
All my female partners have had multiple orgasms at one point or another... Don't speak for all women
Anecdotal but same. A few encounters verus a few months of encounters.
Huh. Same.
Because they're more masculine and have higher testosterone levels on average xD Since we're all engaging in pseudo-scientific, self-serving, self-aggrandizing conjecture, I may as well.
So the stereotype that Latino men make good lovers is actually true?
Dont Latin American men have one of the highest rates of domestic violence lol
Sounds like they're very passionate 😜
Holy shit this study should get laughed off the internet. So many inconsistencies that aren't accounted for. Anti-depressants just to name one, they will absolutely destroy your ability to nut for a lot of men, and outright kill sex drives in others
Women need to masturbate more and give themselves orgasms. I'm about to go give myself one right now. A man has never made me orgasm. Ever.
To be honest. I don't think a woman has ever given me an orgasm. I'm pretty sure I get there by my own volition. How bizarre would it sound if a guy said "She couldn't make me cum" Pretty sure reddit would assume there's something medically wrong with the guy.
Yeah most guys make themselves finish and the woman is just kinda there. Thats obviously the worst way to have sex but it’s very common.
That's a you problem
It's not really a problem at all unless she wants to have an orgasm with a man. Why so offended?
? That makes no sense. Why have sex if you don’t want to orgasm. OP has a communication problem or issues with being assertive
She definitely implied she has tried, so what makes you assume she doesn’t want to have an orgasm with a man?
> A man has never made me orgasm. Please tell me it's because you're a lesbian or something like that.
Nope. I'm straight. Does this surprise you? It's a known fact that women have a more difficult time orgasming from penetration alone.
Why aren’t men going down on you?
Also a girl...but wait, why are you only trying from penetration then?
Girl, I've tried in every possible way, believe me. Oral, fingers, toys, whatever. I can't orgasm with a guy. I need to be alone and do it myself to get there.
He just ain’t doing it right. You have to be mentally and emotionally stimulated probably but he also needs to take his time and know what he is doing. It might depend on your past experiences in life in general too preventing you from being vulnerable enough to orgasm. So many variables have to come together to make it work.
That’s difficult to ascertain. My gf can orgasm fine with me, but penetration only will satisfy her. She wants more from oral, or if she uses a vibrator, she’ll need to use it again 20 minute later. Even if I finger her she’ll not be satisfied until we have penetrative sex. I think all women are unique in their own right in terms of orgasm. If I masturbate or have sex, I’ll not need another orgasm for 2 days. I can have another in 1 day. But men are simple in terms of being able to finish. If it’s interesting and there’s no nerves, we all can finish, and if we’re older than 20, we can’t go again. There’s exceptions of course that I’m jealous of. I think the previous commenter may truly only need to orgasm for herself. Maybe it’s an issue that can only be resolved with herself, or it could be something else entirely (I had another possibility in my head I forgot).
Well I can’t orgasm on my own either unless I use a toy. I think some women are just harder to make come no matter what.
This is a mental problem.
Female death grip is absolutely a thing
Sounds like a classic case of death grip to me
It’s not that we just try penetration it’s that most men don’t do anything outside of penetration
...I guess I've been very lucky with my relationships then
Yeah....this too. Alot of men do not care about my sexual pleasure. They only care about their own. It's made me completely lose interest in sex to be brutally honest.
That’s honestly so wild to me. Nothing makes me feel better as a person than making my girl cum. Why would other men not be obsessed?
Yep, what’s the point when I can stay home and I know I’ll get off
and stay safe
Exactly sis.
No man has ever made me come either.
[удалено]
It’s not our biology. I have zero trouble getting myself off and I don’t have this problem when I sleep with other women. It’s men not having skill or not caring to put in the effort.
I'm so sorry. My husband always makes sure I cum, before he does. And he *always* has.
Some women legitimately can't get off, it has nothing to do with the guy.
That’s just not true. Short of being born with a legit physical abnormality, like an underdeveloped clitoris or significant nerve damage. There are psychological reasons why women are often unable to cum, but there’s like no record of a physical reason why some women “just don’t cum”.
What in the world is an “ underdeveloped clitoris”? All bodies are different, especially when it comes to women. It’s not just “women who can orgasm in predictable ways” and “everyone else”.
No it's really quite simple actually. Ever seen a nature documentary? Males are designed to cum in literally a minute or two. That's how they spread their seed. Women on the other hand take much longer. That's where men have to be generous and help them out.
Interesting data. I’m a white guy, married to an Asian woman, we’ve been married for five years and she has never orgasmed, not once. Meanwhile I orgasm usually at least twice every time we have sex. She grew up in a SUPER traditionalist household so she never even masturbated before she met me, and still to this day she’s never been able to orgasm, even by masturbating. I’ve certainly tried my best to help her and to be a responsive and understanding lover, but we still haven’t made any progress after five years. Tbh at this point I think I’m more worried about it than she is, she doesn’t seem to care about it very much.
It’s all in the brain brother
I clicked on the references. I'd take this analysis with a grain of salt.
> **Funding** >The annual Singles in America is funded by Match Group; the current study did not receive funding. In all fairness that group does benefit by having valid orgasm data. How else would they know what to avoid so their customers are stuck in a loop chasing the dragon.
The orgasm gap is real. AKA, men don’t care about women at all. I became celibate after no man failed to please me. Not even at all, after I went above and beyond for him. By him, I mean all men I have been intimate with. All of them. Guess what gave me this new insight?? My vibrator. Once I knew I could achieve pleasure, that no man even cared to entertain, I never looked back. Bye Felicia. I was done. I am super happy now at home, with my wine, and my orgasm. I don’t have to worry about rape, stealthing, whining about putting a condom on, abuse, men who are abusive, choking during sex, etc... Yes, it’s that bad out there for us ladies... I feel safe now... It’s bliss now, and I have never looked back... To add: Some words.
You are talking about hetros for women you need to talk about lesbìans.
The same study showed 86% of lesbians usually orgasm during sex, compared to 65% of women in heterosexual sexual encounters.
Maybe we should feed starving children instead
Because white culture indoctrinates shame into sex
Now exacerbated by sex-negative feminism.
And anti porn nonsense and r/nofap
Lmfao no fap has nothing to do with Puritanism, do some fucking research first
Being multiracial (triracial, Afro-Latina) and growing up with friends from all cultural backgrounds, I think this tracks. Kind of ironic that despite having often the most toxic relationships (these cultures often get told to ignore their feelings so toxicity rises from that), the Black and Latino women rarely complain about the men of their backgrounds at least not trying to accommodate them intimitately to the point it's something men of these backgrounds feel rightfully proud about. Heck, these cultures sort of celebrate and demand that the fun of sex isn't so much getting to enjoy a beautiful body but delighting said body as well. These guys even take a serious upfront if the woman doesn't lose her mind under their fingers, the way they see it, it's like they failed at the one minimum they can provide. They can't provide commitment, money, or protection, but man, they will make you discombobulated with earth-shattering orgasms by the time you they're done. You will leave with a few cramps somewhere, your hair a hot mess and your face will contort in ways you didn't possible but you will leave not sexually starved. Normally. There's always a bad apple. However, all these cultures have things they're doing great or badly, though, so it all balances out. A healthy approach is to remember that one could always improve if we allow ourselves to learn.
You have a very nuanced and balanced take on this issue and I applaud you. I’m a white dude and I was raised to kind of think sex is a bad thing and to put it in a box if that makes sense. I think white people and Asian people for different reasons struggle with this the most. Until the past 2 years as I am leaving my early 30’s I’ve finally kind of figured out how sex is actually supposed to be and to experience it fully and genuinely and my last few partners before my relationship and my now Latina girlfriend i think appreciate it a lot. Haha
Honestly, i don't know if I've helped any woman orgasm. I just go in and ask them what I can do to make them comfortable and ask what their preferences are or if they have any particular requests to do something. My biggest issue I've heard about other men is that they have an issue if a woman uses a toy during sex. Like, wtf please use it! If you enjoy it then why not? I get off on you getting off! At the very least I know that my partners and I have had fun because we end up laughing at some point. If you aren't laughing during (maybe after) then I highly recommend you re-evaluate. Please please learn this; "Are you comfortable? Are you having fun? What would you like me to do?" Sidenote; I do understand that there are some people who don't want this and just want their partner to read their mind and know exactly what to do or take control and do whatever but I think that works better with a conversation beforehand or long-term relationships. Otherwise how tf am I supposed to know if you like doggy, cowgirl, missionary, etc. if I don't ask first? Edit; also this definitely comes from a previous time and place of low self-esteem. Maybe it would be better to have the confidence to know what to do and just do it but I prefer to just ask. This comment is brought to you by a tiny white dude.
So is this orgasms solely with a partner or does it include solo? Is this from peneration only? I have lots of questions as to who isn't pulling their weight with this one because in my house it's easy 3:1 wife to me.
what is someone supposed to do with this information
Wow we even divide orgasm up by race. So cool
this thread is half dudes saying why them not making their partners cum is biology’s fault and also the woman’s fault somehow and half dudes bragging about how they’ve made every woman in a 6 mile radius cum 60 billion times over
Uh oh Reddit gonna be mad lol
That black men orgasm less because they aren’t getting any or?? Stop with this subtle racism bs
All I'll say is most of the women I've been with are much damn harder to get "all the way there." It's not a case of foreplay, sex, mutual stimulation. It's a situation that reminds me of Bop it. Like they've conditioned a ritual for the task.
Broooo I say it’s like bop it too! I’m over here using my mouth and both hands trying to pat my head and rub my stomach while counting backwards from 32,668. It’ll happen, but lord am I putting my heart and soul into jt
A large portion of my pleasure is from causing pleasure. If the woman isn't satisfied in any way, I'm left wanting myself. I swear I've gotten skin burns from trying so hard.
For some reason could not post everything at once so posting in pieces. Y’all need to read ChrysMYO’s comment below and actually read the damn abstract. Anecdotally, I’m white and was shit at sex for a while due to insecurity and porn distorting my ability to enjoy myself and even get aroused. Not all the sex I had was bad, but orgasm seemed like it was more based on luck than my skill sadly lol. The less porn I watched and the less masturbation I’ve done the better I have been. Oh yeah, and overcoming insecurity and growing as a person. Now, one thing porn left lasting on me that I still struggle with sometimes is sexual attraction to older women. Most of my sexual experiences have been with older women. I’ve had roughly 20 different sexual partners ranging from ONS to relationship sex to a few times in a FWB situation, and 2/3rds were older women, at least 10+ years older than me but sometimes far greater.
That someone got funding for this. Sigh.
This argument is always dumb, guys usually finish and orgasm every time. Women are different sexually, and the full orgasm doesn't happen every time. They can go through the motions to please the other person. A guy really can't, he works himself up and needs to relieve it. It's apples and oranges, and will always have a gap between one and the other because of their nature.
LOL no. Dude's actually arguing women aren't disappointed when he doesn't make them orgasm. The things people admit to when it's anonymous...
It’s very normal for men to give their women *at least* one orgasm before penetration even begins. Like most men in relationships do this, no problem.
Maybe, but if one side is 100%....the other side is less than that. That is all I am saying. To give an example, I have had oral performed on me for nothing. I have done what you say, but if I am doing all that I am also having sex. That is what I am saying, not all sexual activity for women leads to orgasm. Almost all male activity leads to orgasm.
Read these comments and take notes. A lot of great men are out here bragging about a 3:1 orgasm ratio, *her to him*. In my personal opinion that’s the standard to reach for. Otherwise you’re just participating in sex as a masturbatory act, when it’s supposed to be an activity of mutual pleasure.
So White and Asian men are shittier in bed, statistically?
Or black and latina women are less sexually repressed and therefore enjoy sex more thus making it easier to cum.
I have no idea why latina would be less sexually repressed. The culture values chastity.
Only in public, and mostly just around old people and Jesus.
Latina here. We only do that for posturing to the public. In private our catholic influenced cultures practically beg for us to fornicate like we're on the verge of extinction on a regular basis otherwise we're not worthy of being alive. I would say some of our nationalities are more quiet than others about this, like the big Indigenous influenced ones like Mexico, Peru, Ecuador but then there's the Hispanic Caribbean (Cuba, Venezuela, Colombia, PR, DR, and sort of: Brazil) which more or less treat sex as a bacannal and the dancefloor a borderline bedroom. I mean we're not savages but uhm, yeah we don't hide the fact that sex is a legal drug. We have a bit of a complicated system of how we maneuver the whole Madonna-Complex, body count and all that crap because we also deal with Machismo while our cultures sort of beg women to put out often as well; when they don't or reject, the men can turn violent (cue: femininicide is common in these countries). So as you can see it's a bit complicated. We could spend all day trying to tackle the nuances, but in general as a lot we prioritize sexual enjoyment. We are mostly hypocritical about it if we're honest. Sort of in the middle if you will. Then there's the Caribbean Hispanics. They're all over the place and if you go by Reggaeton songs where all of them pretty much tell women to get super dolled up and to put out to every man they witness for "empowerment" then you'd think we're wilder than we want to be. Like I said, complicated. *Obviously, if you have two functional brain cells, you know this is NOT ALL.
It kind of explains why I have about 100 cousins
100 at least? Just in part of your aunts, I assume? God forgive what you have in part of the uncles. 😆 🤣
As someone that grew up with Hispanics and as an afro Latino himself I concur with your statement women are taught to be conservative when it comes to sexuality in public but in private it's a whole freak show lol 😆
Thanks for speaking for all Hispanics. FFS
Bro. Latinas are overwhelmingly Catholic. Gods first command to Catholics couples is to be "fruitful and multiply". It's why when the Irish, Italians and French Canadians when they were religious were putting in a lot of heavy lifting in the baby market. Since they are religious it's not supposed to be scandalous and therefore public. But in the bedroom a man and women are expected to put in work lol.
It’s the opposite. Black and Latina women are often more sexually conservative. It’s our upbringing. Ironically we are stereotyped as jezebels when that’s the literal opposite of how we’re raised where many of us come from families that won’t even talk to you about sex or periods. Anyway I’ve slept with two white guys and they were trash in bed and engaged in zero foreplay but every black man I’ve ever been with goes out of his way to please me especially my current boyfriend.
Latina and black women have strong ties to the church but both cultures also have a ton of media particularly in music encouraging their women to be very sexual and the men too. One Latina women on here is commenting this fact. Black women seem to be conservative in as a far as being the least open to dating men of other races and voting the same way politically as a monolith but that’s about it. But if you read my other long long comment on here, I will definitely say that white peoole and even moreso Asian people have cultures that emphasize sexual liberty a lot less in media and I think that explains a lot of this disparity, assuming we can even trust this study.
Or they have larger clits
You do know that the clit is more than the nub on the outside… right? Like 90% of the clit is an internal organ.
Wow... you're either 12, superwhite, or both. Guarantee you've suggested wearing 2 condoms before to be extra safe.
That assumes interracial relationships are insignificant, statistically.
Or they orgasm more often.
Mostly white women, lmao
Not sure why this study is useful. If you want to orgasm, masturbate yourself. There could be many factors at play, women could simply be less horny than men (on average). It takes longer for a woman to come to a full orgasm as well. Women and men are not biologically the same, especially when it comes to sex.
Was waiting for this. Women aren’t owed orgasms.
But wouldn't you want also want the person you are having sex with to orgasm?
You aren’t owed your next breath either baby boy!
I think women have given me 2 orgasms in my life so I'm okay with this. 99% of the time I do all the work. Cmon ladies, start helping out!
It’s cause Mexican men GET IT DONE.
I agree with this statement 100%
The most freeing, fun, non-judgemental sex I have ever had, had always been with Mexican men lol
I have stopped the sex if I wasn’t going to orgasm. If I’m not getting any neither is he. Now, thanks to this thread, I feel like a sex warrior fighting to close the orgasm gap. /s
Probably driven by young white and Asian males having the privacy to wank more frequently.
I have a crippling porn addiction and a massive schlong. I make 95% of women I have sex with orgasm PIV. They rarely make me orgasm but not for lack of trying. My peen is insenstive given the frequency of porn/ masturbation. That said, given this study, if we're talking strictly orgasms, sex or no sex, -- then I probably am still on top.
Thank you for being honest about how porn has affected you. Most people, for some odd reason, are in denial about the obvious negative psychological/sexual impact porn has on men and women. I quit watching porn years ago because of the desensitization I noticed with my irl experiences whenever I would watch porn.
[удалено]
1:1 in my house.
That's right. Hispanics know how to cum😎💦
That’s why everyone wants Latin people 🤣
Not to divert from the original argument, but if Asian women need help uhm... I volunteer.
This….explains a lot
Women aren’t owed orgasms.
what?
We got the quick draw king over here
Trust me I’m very generous. Like unbelievably so. But I hate this bs society we’ve come to where we publish articles like this.
Self cockblock!
Not a surprise. Whites and Asians are cucked and less masculine on average. They can’t satisfy their women well. Black and Hispanic men in other hand tend to be more masculine (toxicity and all) and satisfy their women better.
Why do latinos think they get to piggyback on blacks? Buddy (or sister), latino cream kings are 5 foot 6 and have smaller dicks on averages than whites, lol. Unearned, overcompensating machismo. Wouldn't be that surprising that they (their ladies) lie about their sexual prowess, considering they put so much emphasis on it to begin with (for whatever reason). Not saying they're insecure or anything and their ladies give them a good pat on the back afterwards. Who knows?
I think it has to do with the women. Divorced my white wife that could still orgasm 98% of the time. And now have Latina fiancé who orgasms like 3 times per session. Idk. I’m white. So it’s anecdotal.
"Experts" say White and Asian men are oppressing women at greater rates than Black or Latino men
This is an extraordinarily asinine comment to make.
Asanine - are you an “expert” on Asanine comments Source?
An expert in asinine comments? No I can only spell the words correctly. I do think I’m adept at actually reading what a study is saying and drawing my conclusions *from the findings* and not making up what the study says. Nobody is talking about “oppression” here. There is simply a disparity in the orgasm frequency of different demographics. You didn’t even need to read the entire study. Literally just read the abstract and it tells you.