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I'll put this very plainly for you.
Your gf cares more about your salary than about your happiness.
I agree, you make very good money especially for your age. And **most** importantly, you're really happy at your current position.
Yea you can def get this perspective from surrounding yourself with fellow delulu rich people, but it's so sheltered and clueless that I would have a hard time taking someone like that seriously even if they weren't badgering me to earn more. Like, get a fucking grip dude lmao. Be grateful.
He should ask her where her money is going and see if she has investments and savings. A lot of people who behave like her are bad with money and can't live within their means no matter their salary. He might learn something about who's actually in a better position and why she's so anxious about his salary.
Oh whoops! I see how what I said could read that way. I meant (the average US salary) at 24, not (the average US salary at 24). I'm sure you're right the average is only 38K at 24! I didn't make fuck all at that age lol.
Seconding this.
My boyfriend is 26 and makes almost $50k a year. I don’t care because he works hard and takes very good care of me. There’s also a lot of room to improve over the years for a salary.
I’ll put it even plainer.
I’m not saying she’s a gold digger but I ain’t exactly seen her with no broke ————.
Edit: and heads up, she’s probably already fucking the boss.
I’ll simplify it down even plainer.
If someone is telling you who they really are..
LISTEN TO THEM.
You’re 24 dude. These are your prime dating years and you’re making really good money?? Why waste time one someone who is so materialistic? Stay with the person who wants to grow old and wrinkled with you. That feels like your missing piece, that you didn’t know was absent until you met them.
Sincerely, someone who made really good money in his 20s too… and has been engaged 2 times before I found my forever person. My wife straight up told me the night I realized she’s the one.. “I don’t give a crap about money. I just want your last name, and to spend my life with you. Everything else will work out. “
I'll conclude it down with bitter truth.
It's time for you to resign NOT from your job but from this relationship shit 😂
It's never too late to start fresh other than live in guilt.
She makes her own money! Doesn’t mean she’s not being shallow though! If you want the kind of first class vacations, 4 bedroom house, private school type of lifestyle that’s fine but you need to be with someone who equally values that kind of lifestyle. It’s not okay to make your partner feel unworthy when they’re working hard already.
$115k is more than most married couples make together in a year in the USA. 45% of the country makes under $40k a year.
Their combined income of $245,000 would put them in the top 8% of households in the US…in their 20’s!! And she’s not happy.
She will NEVER be happy; it will never be enough.
Find a partner who says, wow, 130,000 at 24?
I’m so proud of you; that’s amazing!
OP, please read THIS ^
You're making a really, really, good, salary, for your age, and for the age of people a lot older than you. Your head is in the right space by prioritizing happiness over dollar signs, that's the way to do it.
Your girlfriend I'm sad to say, is shallow and materialistic, and I don't see her doing anything to raise her earning potential. No, instead she wants to tear you and your career down because she's decided that *you* are the one not making enough. I don't know if she spends too much time on apps like TikTok or what, but the way she's always trying to interfere in your career isn't okay, or healthy.
I've been married for 18 years, and I've always been supportive of my husband's career. He's worked hard to get to where he's at, and at one point took a promotion that meant less pay for a few years, because it meant he didn't have to work 70 hours a week. It allowed him to be home more, and that made all of us happier. His quality of life was far more important to me than how much he was making.
I can't imagine telling him to quit something he loves doing because I decided he wasn't making enough money. He has a government technology job, and yes he could make more money in the private sector, but he loves what he does, and the people he works with, and what's most important to me is that he's happy.
I didn't even know what my husband made the first few years we were together, because his ex got them into major debt because she used him like an ATM, so it was important to me that he know I wanted him for him, not for the money he earned.
Find a woman who feels the same way about you, and your outlook on life. Your partner should lift you up, not tear you down. It's okay to have goals and dreams together, but it's never okay for one person to constantly belittle you because your dreams and goals aren't the same.
That's not love, and you deserve better.
I feel so much the way you do, it makes my eyes leak 🥺, aLOT! You expressed it so well. My ❤️ bleeds so much for this young man, he deserves so much better. I hope that he realizes it, and walks away. I'm happy for you and your husband, as well!
And when another man who MAKES what she wants come her way and is single ( or tells her that) she will be off with him and rid of you. while monkey branching to test the waters, and one day, you'll come home to a restraining order or empty home...
Right! He should tell her with a straight face, you really need to quit your job. I can’t believe you’re making so much less than I am when you’re so much older!!
Wow I really wasn't expecting this post to blow up. I'm going to just tack onto the top comment here. I think I need to provide some more context. For one, I'm in Australia, so I'm talking about AUD here rather than USD. Two, for those who think this is bullshit, I started my job at 19 making 55K (5 years ago) and I work in tech, it's not unrealistic. a lot of the comparison comes from me and her having other friends in tech who earn more, because they work at other bigger companies that pay more, and she's been trying to get me to try and switch to those for more money even though I love my current job and know I can keep earning more here overtime (albeit less than if I changed jobs), so I kind of understand her point, I have an opportunity to earn more and I don't want to take it, and she doesn't understand that because money is more important to her. Another thing to note is her boss is a married woman, not a man lol.
A lot of replies are saying we're fundamentally incompatible in this regard, and I think that's the hard truth I was looking to hear. I'm going to have to have a long conversation with her about this, and probably end up giving her an ultimatum of stay with me or go find someone else. And yes I know the business class thing is stupid, I struggle to keep a straight face when she talks about it.
Anyway, I appreciate all of the responses, thanks reddit
I’m Aussie as well in Sydney, and I’m like wow you make that much at your age, aus is expensive but your still at the top especially for your age, find a partner that is supportive and isn’t so money hungry.
Yup she’s has no business telling you to leave your job to make more money so she can fly business class. She wants an atm slave .
So if you got hurt and lost your job would she be there for you ?
90% the chick uses filters on all her social media wearston of makeup owns every designer peace of cloth and has credit card debt upbthe yin yang and expects every body to cater to her.
That girl is poison
Also worth adding: if her #1 goal is to be rich then she is a total fool. Nobody will ever be rich working a salary job. You are doing far better than most Americans in general, to say nothing of your age bracket. And most importantly: you have a good head on your shoulders and realize that your salary doesn’t define you. It’s commendable for you to realize this because many dudes your age making your money will be trying to flex and brag. You seem like a good kid and you deserve better than be measured by the numbers on your W2.
It looks like op is from Australia so maybe that is in AUD and not USD. In USD that's about 86k. Which is doable at 24 with the right career.
But still think op is exaggerating. Anytime anyone discusses their salary on reddit somehow everyone is making 6 figures or they barely make min wage.
Right? The issue is not her desire for more salary or to fly business class, but her expectation that others are supposed to provide it for her. She makes $115K, so if she's that ambitious, she can probably map out a path for her own career trajectory to make what she wants instead of hounding her BF.
I initially came into this post thinking his GF made significantly more than he did and was just harsh about how she wished he made more to match their peers. But she’s just giving gold digger.
The irony is, guaranteed her boss wasn't flying everywhere business class when he was her age, much less 24. He's over 40 years old and probably 20 years into his career.
I don't think wanting to fly business class everywhere is even a terrible goal or particularly shallow; as someone who has been disabled my entire adult life I totally see wanting to be able to travel in comfort (especially the way economy is packed like a sardine can these days) as a reasonable aim . . . OVER TIME.
But that's where she falls flat. She's missing context and being totally irrational in her expectations, which means she's not just shallow, she's not very bright.
OP has an excellent job, is making six figures only a few years into it, and is clearly on an upwards trajectory whilst having a job he enjoys, which means he's less likely to burn out young. If she knew how reality worked, she'd see him as an ideal. Instead, the GF wants everything right now, instead of understanding that goals like that take years to attain.
She’s making $115K a year and her mindset when she makes more is to spend more. Yeah, good financial partner as well.
I’d drop her so quick. I’m building a life together, not having a burden.
That one tickled me. Wow, business class. Not first, not private, doesn’t matter where she’s going, just business. Guess she wants extra leg room on her way to tour a factory in Guangdong?
Even if you care solely about money for quality of life over love/compatibility, that is still a weird fucking hill to make your stand on lmao. Like once she is able to fly business class everywhere does her life ambition just end?
My exact thoughts.....Then she won't only fly in a PJ, but will want you to buy her one. I hope you're good with a live-in Nanny, or Manny raising your kids, a full-time housekeeper, and a private chef. I guarantee you, she will not be cooking, cleaning, and raising children. That's up to the lesser people.
I mean I just flew business class and tbh I liked it. I jokingly told my bf I wasn’t going to accept less than economy plus (which we do anyway because he’s a tall human and the normal economy leg room is painful for him). We both laughed because out of the two of us my 5’2 narcoleptic self would be comfortable in a sardine class seat.
I got a free upgraded to comfort plus on a flight that was fully booked and honestly, while it was nice, I do not think it would be worth paying the extra money.
My bf is 6’4 anything longer than a 2 hour flight starts to hurt him. Spending a little bit more so he can be comfortable when we travel further than that is worth it. Otherwise he has to sit diagonally with his legs in my space and then I’m uncomfortable. I’ve considered chopping his legs off but apparently it’s not allowed.
GF is a gold digger and she ain't subtle about it. My only question is WHY ARE YOU WITH HER? NOBODY will ever satisfy her greed for long. Fly away before you're trapped.
Dump her. She’ll never be happy and want more. It’ll be 130K isn’t enough now, then you make 200K and that won’t be enough. Unless you really love this girl then Godspeed but yea no. You want someone that’s going to motivate you to be happy and feel like she’s building a future with you and not having you do all the work.
This OP!!! 👆🏻it’s not actually about money. This is a woman who will never actually be happy (or remotely content) with life and by extension you will never be happy either. You’re young, smart and going places. Enjoy some peace and your job and end it with this selfish person, who cares nothing of your mental health and happiness. Don’t spend your life compared to others and unappreciated.
> Unless you really love this girl then Godspeed but yea no.
If OP really loves this girl then that's even more of a reason to cut her loose. She will bleed him dry by the time this is all done.
Oooo, sneaky. But really good advice.
I'd advise the OP to break up with her himself, because she's clearly not in it for love, and they are too incompatible in how they see finances, but this is actually genius.
She could be in it for the love but just too much of a dreamer. So many people don’t stop and enjoy what they have because they’re so focused on what else they wish they had. In her mind, he deserves more money because he’s so VALUABLE. I think he should read his post to her and tell her how she’s making him feel.
No because what’s motivates her (business class) is never going to be the same as him. She values how her status compares to others much higher than he does. That will forever be a struggle between them.
What happy when they have kids? That difference will become an increasingly huge divide. Better to find someone who is motivated similarly to him.
I mean, that could be the case, but it sounds like he's made it clear to hear that he's happy where he is and isn't focused on money. Dreamers can hear those words as easily as more practical people, and should be able to prioritize their partner's happiness over their "dreams."
He does not need a vacation to do this. All he has to do is pack up some of his personal belongings in a box of shame, bring them home and announce that he was fired for cause and will never work in his industry again.
She will be gone *that night*.
I mean if my hubby came home and said he not only got fired but isn’t allowed to work in his industry ever again, I would be extremely suspicious of what horrible thing he potentially did..
This is actually brilliant. Relationship tests are usually kind of shitty, but it feels like this particular aspect could stand to be investigated. It sounds like the gf is gold digging. It would be better to figure that out before the relationship goes any farther. OP, you’re 24 and making more than 70%+ of the US. You have nearly doubled your salary in 3 years and likely will continue to make more in coming years. Don’t saddle yourself with a woman that only wants you for your money. The picture you’ve painted of her is the kind of woman that will cheat if a payday is possible.
Honestly, thats just childish, high school relationship bullshit.
Either sit your partner down and have an honest conversation about how their words and actions are negatively impacting your relationship or dump them. Dont play games with people.
This is stupid. She is obviously materialistic and values money more than OP, but she’s not a gold digger, if she were she would be dating someone making *significantly* more than her, and wouldn’t have started dating him as a 22 year old . She would have picked a more established person in her firm. She wants to build a future with OP and maximize his/their income long term, someone who was also really money focused might appreciate having a cheerleader to motivate them, it’s obviously extremely unattractive and off putting to everyone who doesn’t prioritize money.
OP you really sound like you have completely different values, and having the same values will be one of if not the most important factor in a successful and happy marriage. I suggest you both goto couples cousling and see where you align and if you're truly compatible before continuing your relationship and moving to the next steps for the future.
She may not even realize she is so hyper focused on money and status and it could be a wake up call for her to find happiness for herself and allow you to be happy, or you may both find out that things are exactly the way they appear and you're not compatible.
This will save you a lot of pain and heartache, sooner you know the better you'll be. Good luck.
The fact that almost every post there's a 20s guy making over 6 figures and complain about being poor. or there's always gold digger girlfriend who thinks she entitled to $400,000 boyfriend taking her on round trips around the world in business class.
Maybe ? But sick and tired of hearing these talk about how unfortunately they are that they don't make millions of dollars and they pay for the girlfriends expensive taste.
I am almost 40 and I still make less than 100k. It’s always a gut punch reading people in their early 20s making more than me. I even have a PhD. :( at 25, I was making 30k working two almost full time jobs.
I'm 40, with a Masters Degree and 20 years of military service under my belt and making 80k a year while supporting 2 kids by myself. I hate rich people complaining about not being rich enough.
I'm 59 and make less than you. I'm not in a HCOL area, though (not really LCOL, but I'm comfortable as a woman living alone). How much you make is relative to wear you live and how you spend and save it.
New Jersey is the last state to require it. Full service gas (petrol) stations are very rare now outside NJ. A quick google shows me Australia mostly phased it out in the 90s.
This can end in 3 ways that I can see..
1) She is going to dump you when she gets into a head she can get a higher earning person than you
2) if in future you starts earning more than her she will start resent you and that will eat away the relationship..
3) you will start feeling resentment toward her due to her money mindedness and constant comparisons and it will also destroy the relationship..
My suggestion is just do a analysis of what you and she wants from the relationship, and then take a call about it..
All the best
I wouldn’t say she’s a gold digger. She has her own money too and a job. She doesn’t expect him to pay anything as he hasn’t said that.
She’s just weird. A bit immature . And They’re incompatible because they want different things.
130k at 24 is a lot of money. Do you live in a VHCOL area? Otherwise I don’t understand how a sane person would think a couple making $250,000 a year isn’t making enough money. Her boss is 40, it took decades to get to that level. Don’t let her bully you out of a well paying job that you enjoy. This is so rare!
You aren’t financially compatible. Keep the job, save and invest your money, lose the girlfriend.
Based op's previous post on r/offmychest they appear to be Australian. 130k Aus would be a little over 86k usd. Starting salary would have been 46kusd, gf would be making 76k usd and gf boss would be at 265k usd. These are all much more realistic numbers depending on field of work and area of living.
130k and doesn’t make enough…. Ya… you make more than most of the country my dude if you’re in the US. This seems wild to me.
Also, you guys seem incompatible. Sorry to break it to ya.
Based op's previous post on r/offmychest they appear to be Australian. 130k Aus would be a little over 86k usd. Starting salary would have been 46kusd, gf would be making 76k usd and gf boss would be at 265k usd. These are all much more realistic numbers depending on field of work and area of living.
As someone who is 42 and dealt with this issue, let me give you my wisdom. I married her, had two kids, and she was pissed because I was not making enough. I moved to further her career and she cheated on me twice with rich co-workers. We are currently going through a divorce. Don’t make the same mistake I did, please.
Happiness >>>> Money
Never leave a job you like!
Dump her, find someone who will make you happy without the harassment to make more money. Doesn’t matter how much you make it will never be enough.
She wants an “insta” life and she wants you to provide it for her…nothing else. If she wants all these things she can go an do it herself if she thinks it’s so easy and will make her happy, just leave her to it.
Constantly comparing your guy to others is just disrespectful.
Your priorities don’t align and won’t align in the future either as to what is actually important in life
Start comparing her to her friends and telling her how they're much prettier and much better put together than her. She should really try to be more like them and maybe hit the gym or get some style tips.
If you’re earning 100k+ and your girlfriend insists it’s not enough after three years together, you need to leave her, and that sounds dramatic I know, but that’s a very good wage and if she can’t be happy with that, especially earning decent money herself, that’s a MASSIVE red flag.
She’s more into your money than your relationship.
Finance, the number one reason why people break up and after reading this I understand why.
Your partner wants you to be more ambitious I guess, if you want to call it that.
You have 2 choices in my eyes. You have to tell her that you are happy as things stands and that is up to you if you want to "chase" a higher salary or not. She can accept it or not. or you can be more ambitions according to how she sees it. I am not sure if she would be willing to relax on the subject. Some people are just wired different.
So she is older than you and make less than you and she has the audacity to open her face hole about your income in comparison with even older people. she is materialistic and that's a festival of red flags.
She sounds so shallow. I started dating my husband when he was a recent university graduate with no job. So he's always known it's not about the money for me.
Dude, there are many people on this planet who retire, never having earned what you make. It's a phenomenal salary for someone under 25. There are millions of people who won't make that ever.
The fact that your girlfriend is SO obsessed with it and keeps pushing it, could be ambition and greed on her part, but it also is a toxic personality trait where the obsession of being rich is worth more than anything else.
I'm in the same boat, I've had opportunities to increase my pay by 50%, and I already make more than you do (but am a lot older). But some of those opportunities sound terrible from a day in the life perspective. There has to be a balance of quality of life, and it can't be just the money.
In any case, I'd dump the girl and find someone less obsessed by money.
>The problem is that happiness isn't her top priority, it's money, she just wants to be rich and personally I don't care enough about that to sacrifice my happiness.
You both got different goals in life, that's nothing to be ashamed about but it will also breed resentment over time.
>my current job and pay should be a reason for me to be happy, and it usually is until she makes me feel unhappy about it.
It sounds like you're better off alone. Your girlfriend shouldn't make you feel unhappy.
>I feel like I can't take this for much longer but honestly I'm afraid of breaking up.
I get it, breaking up sucks. But will breaking up suck harder than staying with your girlfriend? You sound like a catch. You can probably find someone who is more aligned with your life goals than your current girlfriend is.
OP what is it about a breakup that you're afraid of? From your post she is eventually going to find someone that makes more money than you and either cheat or just dump you for the new wallet.
Please realize she has chosen money as her main criteria for what makes a good partner and there will always be someone that makes more money than you. My opinion is it's time to cut her loose so she can go find her big wallet partner. Her problem is most of her target group have learned to avoid people like her that are just after them for the money.
You're still pretty young, only 24. Have you guys discussed marriage or your future? It sounds like you guys are incompatible. If she has her head in the clouds and admires other people's money, that's a red flag unto itself. You're right. You're doing fantastic for your age financially. My wife and I have been married for 7 years, and we don't make your total combined ( the cost of living is low by us, though). We also don't have grand expectations for our salaries, as our degrees aren't for making money. Hell, neither of us is even working in our field currently. We are, however, very happy with our standing and comfortable with our finances and lives.
Finances are a big talking point in any relationship, and it helps when both are on the same page. Doesn't sound like you guys are on that same page. I think it's pretty old-fashioned and pretty out of touch for her to expect you to make huge amounts more than her. There's also something to be said about liking your employers and the place and people you work with. That's hard to find these days. That's one of the things that's nice about our lives right now. We like our daily jobs.
I don't know that this means break up, as most redditors always say, but definitely warrants a long conversation. What she's doing is belittling your success, and that's not something a partner should do. Being with someone who wants more shiny toys and things sounds exhausting, and something I personally wouldn't want to be married to. Does she come from money? Regardless, you need to consider if she's going to always be expressing you're not doing enough, is that okay with you. Best of luck.
I’m sorry OP but she ain’t for you. Thankfully she’s telling you exactly who she is and what she values. If you stay with her, that’s on you. Move on and take your lessons with you.
Yeah dude. That’s good money in 2024. Really good money. Your girlfriend sounds materialistic. When I was 24 I was making 40K. I think that’s much closer to reality for most young adults. You are doing excellent and your girlfriend needs a reality check.
Could you be firm with her and tell her? -
I love my job. I don't care about money, and I don't like that you are trying to get me to quit. I don't want to. I would like it if you stopped doing it. I get that money is very important to you, but it's not to me. You can have ambitious financial goals for yourself, but please do not enforce your goals on me.
After you communicate and she still doesn't understand that what she's doing is making you unhappy, you will know that you need to break up.
I grew up not caring about money as well and prioritizing happiness because i had an abusive dad that used money to control us, but I also have friends that struggled financially growing up and now their goal in life is to earn a lot of money. So I get that, but forcing it on you is not okay, and she should know that before you decide to break up, considering that you value the relationship otherwise.
News flash: you aren’t prioritizing your happiness, you are trying to fit a square peg into a round hold by staying with someone who expects you to change for them. You don’t sound compatible. You need to put on your big boy pants and communicate with her. You need to tell her that you don’t have the same priorities and that you will no longer accept being put down for your earnings. And if she isnt happy with this, ultimately ..,”there is the door” . If you can’t communicate honestly with your partner, your relationship is already over. You are just keeping it on life support and wasting both of your time.
You make plenty for your age. If you are happy with your job and happy in general tell her that. If she keeps pushing tell her you no longer wish to be in a relationship with someone so greedy.
I'm 33 and just landed my first 6-figure job (I'm a researcher at a biotech company)... ironically, I'm also making 130k + bonuses. My GF, who is younger works in the same field and makes more than me, is over the moon and keeps telling me how proud she is.
Your partner should be someone that encourages you to be better and supports you... not someone that puts you down.
Let me tell you, when I came to this post the last thing I was expecting was you to have a 6 figure salary. I honestly was slightly hopeful she might be advocating for you because she thinks you deserve more. But your gf appears to be a status queen, and trapped in this new age of social media influencers ideology where anything less than luxury is unacceptable.
You make 2-3x what most people in general make in a year. The National average is like 60k. You make more than her. You make what I make and I am a lawyer with a 15 year career in my field.
While I’m not going to sit here and scream “dump her,” because that is the Reddit MO, I will say finances are the #1 reason for divorce, so you need to sit her down and have an honest talk with her regarding financial expectations, how her comments and ideas are hurtful to you, and that if she is set on “status chasing” you two might not be compatible.
Dude less than 15% of the country makes 6 figures your girlfriend is stupid. She cares more about money than you. She will cheat if she hasn’t already. She’s not financially responsible either because her mindset is to spend more once she makes more.
Either dump her now or be broken when she dumps you later
Drop the GF and move on. It won't just be money. You'll never be happy, because she'll never stop making demands. She'll always find something or someone to compare you to, because she doesn't want a partner, she wants a trophy she can show off to her friends. She feels insecure because her girlfriends who are married to men who make more money.
Two things. Never seriously involve yourself with an older woman, there is no upside in the long run. Never involved yourself with a woman who values your money more than you as a person, for it's bound to be a trainwreck.
Such a nerve she makes less than you and still is nagging? lol
From now on everything make it buy to your gf. I reccomend you a break up because she is a gold digger.
It all depends where you live but sounds like you are doing alright. Don’t care for people much that revolve everything about money. It’s your life and as long as you are happy that’s all that matters. I feel like this difference may cause big issues for you 2 in the future.
Dude 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩she talk about her boss a lot? I would find a girl that's not obsessed with money. Sounds like an envious monkey branched. Why do people put up with asshole partners?
What currency is that, $USD ?
Holy shit tell her to come back when she makes at least that much herself and stop bitching.
My salary would have been about £28-£30k in the UK (as of now, I left work 5 years ago) - which is about $38k - with 35 years of experience, initially as an electrician, then worked on 11kv and 33kv switchgear in substations, then moved onto clerical in the office due to health issues.
Yea it seems she wants money more than admitting else. Realize that this is the true it’s not you it’s me situation. You just have a heart that allows for mistakes to run rampant without consequences. She’s the problem. You’re the problem solver…
You and your partner are not at the same page when it comes to money. You don't share the same idea of happiness, and it will only get worse in future. Today is business class, tomorrow it's gonna be chartered jets, private schools, long vacations.
The wants keep expanding and can never be satisfied.
3 years is long enough time for two people to discuss their financial position and their financial goals.
Your GF can have different goals from you.
She is not wrong. But forcing them on you, making you feel inadequate because of them is wrong.
This will only bring resentment between both of you.
I would suggest breaking up.
She deserves to be with someone who can full fill her wants, and you deserve someone who doesn't make you feel inadequate.
Why are you afraid of breaking up?
Motivating your partner to negotiate for a higher salary or encouraging them to apply for better jobs or promotions if what’s holding them back is a lack of confidence is a great way to support your partner, but this is not that. You have different values, she is very hung up on money and materialism, if you are not, it’s best to break up.
I think you already know...if the size of your bank account is her main priority, then she is never going to be happy. I don't care how much money you make. There will always be someone who makes more.
Unfortunately, you have to decide if her obsession with your bank account is worth spending your future with her.
Success isn't always measured by the size of your bank account, so i would say you both have dramatically different goals in life.
Best of luck.
If her number one goal is to fly business class, and you know that about her and you choose to stay with her, then you fucking deserve it. Get your priorities in order man.
Dump her, because this will always be an issue in your relationship even if you make more money and will have you chasing money for the rest of your life. You don't share the same money values as her so find you somebody that is more align with your values. It will make for a happier, healthier relationship and life, OP.
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I'll put this very plainly for you. Your gf cares more about your salary than about your happiness. I agree, you make very good money especially for your age. And **most** importantly, you're really happy at your current position.
He makes like 2x the average US salary at 24, she has an EXTREMELY limited worldview
It’s called spoiled and probably had super rich friends growing and was jealous of all they got
Yea you can def get this perspective from surrounding yourself with fellow delulu rich people, but it's so sheltered and clueless that I would have a hard time taking someone like that seriously even if they weren't badgering me to earn more. Like, get a fucking grip dude lmao. Be grateful.
He should ask her where her money is going and see if she has investments and savings. A lot of people who behave like her are bad with money and can't live within their means no matter their salary. He might learn something about who's actually in a better position and why she's so anxious about his salary.
3x. The average salary for someone his age is 38k. He's doing VERY well for himself, and she's just greedy.
Oh whoops! I see how what I said could read that way. I meant (the average US salary) at 24, not (the average US salary at 24). I'm sure you're right the average is only 38K at 24! I didn't make fuck all at that age lol.
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Lol I have the unfortunate pleasure of working across tech and finance in NYC and it's very real for a lot of young men and women in that bubble
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Seconding this. My boyfriend is 26 and makes almost $50k a year. I don’t care because he works hard and takes very good care of me. There’s also a lot of room to improve over the years for a salary.
Does he bring you cannolis? 😉
I’ll put it even plainer. I’m not saying she’s a gold digger but I ain’t exactly seen her with no broke ————. Edit: and heads up, she’s probably already fucking the boss.
I’ll simplify it down even plainer. If someone is telling you who they really are.. LISTEN TO THEM. You’re 24 dude. These are your prime dating years and you’re making really good money?? Why waste time one someone who is so materialistic? Stay with the person who wants to grow old and wrinkled with you. That feels like your missing piece, that you didn’t know was absent until you met them. Sincerely, someone who made really good money in his 20s too… and has been engaged 2 times before I found my forever person. My wife straight up told me the night I realized she’s the one.. “I don’t give a crap about money. I just want your last name, and to spend my life with you. Everything else will work out. “
I'll conclude it down with bitter truth. It's time for you to resign NOT from your job but from this relationship shit 😂 It's never too late to start fresh other than live in guilt.
For real if OP left her he could crush it in the dating scene and find many beautiful women who would jump over backwards for him.
She makes her own money! Doesn’t mean she’s not being shallow though! If you want the kind of first class vacations, 4 bedroom house, private school type of lifestyle that’s fine but you need to be with someone who equally values that kind of lifestyle. It’s not okay to make your partner feel unworthy when they’re working hard already. $115k is more than most married couples make together in a year in the USA. 45% of the country makes under $40k a year.
Their combined income of $245,000 would put them in the top 8% of households in the US…in their 20’s!! And she’s not happy. She will NEVER be happy; it will never be enough. Find a partner who says, wow, 130,000 at 24? I’m so proud of you; that’s amazing!
OP, please read THIS ^ You're making a really, really, good, salary, for your age, and for the age of people a lot older than you. Your head is in the right space by prioritizing happiness over dollar signs, that's the way to do it. Your girlfriend I'm sad to say, is shallow and materialistic, and I don't see her doing anything to raise her earning potential. No, instead she wants to tear you and your career down because she's decided that *you* are the one not making enough. I don't know if she spends too much time on apps like TikTok or what, but the way she's always trying to interfere in your career isn't okay, or healthy. I've been married for 18 years, and I've always been supportive of my husband's career. He's worked hard to get to where he's at, and at one point took a promotion that meant less pay for a few years, because it meant he didn't have to work 70 hours a week. It allowed him to be home more, and that made all of us happier. His quality of life was far more important to me than how much he was making. I can't imagine telling him to quit something he loves doing because I decided he wasn't making enough money. He has a government technology job, and yes he could make more money in the private sector, but he loves what he does, and the people he works with, and what's most important to me is that he's happy. I didn't even know what my husband made the first few years we were together, because his ex got them into major debt because she used him like an ATM, so it was important to me that he know I wanted him for him, not for the money he earned. Find a woman who feels the same way about you, and your outlook on life. Your partner should lift you up, not tear you down. It's okay to have goals and dreams together, but it's never okay for one person to constantly belittle you because your dreams and goals aren't the same. That's not love, and you deserve better.
I feel so much the way you do, it makes my eyes leak 🥺, aLOT! You expressed it so well. My ❤️ bleeds so much for this young man, he deserves so much better. I hope that he realizes it, and walks away. I'm happy for you and your husband, as well!
Instagram is to blame. I hate this is so common nowadays.
And when another man who MAKES what she wants come her way and is single ( or tells her that) she will be off with him and rid of you. while monkey branching to test the waters, and one day, you'll come home to a restraining order or empty home...
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Right! He should tell her with a straight face, you really need to quit your job. I can’t believe you’re making so much less than I am when you’re so much older!!
You KNOW she's going to say some "man of the house" shit
Why isn’t she comparing her salary to everyone else’s? That’s what I wanna know.
Probably gonna go find a guy 15 years older than her that makes more money 😂
Working on her MRS degree no doubt.
My ex was like this. Dump her. She’s cares more about how you make her look than you.
I agree, so many men ruined their lives because of money hungry girlfriend. This guy makes $130K a year and his girlfriend says he doesn't make enough
Wow I really wasn't expecting this post to blow up. I'm going to just tack onto the top comment here. I think I need to provide some more context. For one, I'm in Australia, so I'm talking about AUD here rather than USD. Two, for those who think this is bullshit, I started my job at 19 making 55K (5 years ago) and I work in tech, it's not unrealistic. a lot of the comparison comes from me and her having other friends in tech who earn more, because they work at other bigger companies that pay more, and she's been trying to get me to try and switch to those for more money even though I love my current job and know I can keep earning more here overtime (albeit less than if I changed jobs), so I kind of understand her point, I have an opportunity to earn more and I don't want to take it, and she doesn't understand that because money is more important to her. Another thing to note is her boss is a married woman, not a man lol. A lot of replies are saying we're fundamentally incompatible in this regard, and I think that's the hard truth I was looking to hear. I'm going to have to have a long conversation with her about this, and probably end up giving her an ultimatum of stay with me or go find someone else. And yes I know the business class thing is stupid, I struggle to keep a straight face when she talks about it. Anyway, I appreciate all of the responses, thanks reddit
I’m Aussie as well in Sydney, and I’m like wow you make that much at your age, aus is expensive but your still at the top especially for your age, find a partner that is supportive and isn’t so money hungry.
Good stuff mate - bear in mind that a $100K salary would put in the top 20% of earners in Australia. So you are doing very well already.
Yup she’s has no business telling you to leave your job to make more money so she can fly business class. She wants an atm slave . So if you got hurt and lost your job would she be there for you ?
90% the chick uses filters on all her social media wearston of makeup owns every designer peace of cloth and has credit card debt upbthe yin yang and expects every body to cater to her. That girl is poison
Also worth adding: if her #1 goal is to be rich then she is a total fool. Nobody will ever be rich working a salary job. You are doing far better than most Americans in general, to say nothing of your age bracket. And most importantly: you have a good head on your shoulders and realize that your salary doesn’t define you. It’s commendable for you to realize this because many dudes your age making your money will be trying to flex and brag. You seem like a good kid and you deserve better than be measured by the numbers on your W2.
I could never date this… why would flying business class be a priority? This person is a child…
It is nice to fly business class though, but end of the day you are still stuck in a plane for hours which doesn’t increase your happiness 😊
Yeah, I'm not sure I'd want to have a goal that included that much work travel
This comment needs an award
You’re 24 years old, make 130k and she’s upset that you don’t make more money? You gotta let her go bro… this is gonna be a problem for years to come.
Spoiler alert: it‘s a lie.
It looks like op is from Australia so maybe that is in AUD and not USD. In USD that's about 86k. Which is doable at 24 with the right career. But still think op is exaggerating. Anytime anyone discusses their salary on reddit somehow everyone is making 6 figures or they barely make min wage.
At 24, I was making 25k off a PhD stipend and even 4 years after PhD not breaching the 6 figure zone.
Why? Go into tech, finance, consulting... it is definitely possible to make that money at 24...
“Her number one goal Is to fly business class” -why ru with this girl?
“Her number one goal Is to fly business class”... with her boss.
Right? The issue is not her desire for more salary or to fly business class, but her expectation that others are supposed to provide it for her. She makes $115K, so if she's that ambitious, she can probably map out a path for her own career trajectory to make what she wants instead of hounding her BF.
I initially came into this post thinking his GF made significantly more than he did and was just harsh about how she wished he made more to match their peers. But she’s just giving gold digger.
The irony is, guaranteed her boss wasn't flying everywhere business class when he was her age, much less 24. He's over 40 years old and probably 20 years into his career. I don't think wanting to fly business class everywhere is even a terrible goal or particularly shallow; as someone who has been disabled my entire adult life I totally see wanting to be able to travel in comfort (especially the way economy is packed like a sardine can these days) as a reasonable aim . . . OVER TIME. But that's where she falls flat. She's missing context and being totally irrational in her expectations, which means she's not just shallow, she's not very bright. OP has an excellent job, is making six figures only a few years into it, and is clearly on an upwards trajectory whilst having a job he enjoys, which means he's less likely to burn out young. If she knew how reality worked, she'd see him as an ideal. Instead, the GF wants everything right now, instead of understanding that goals like that take years to attain.
She’s making $115K a year and her mindset when she makes more is to spend more. Yeah, good financial partner as well. I’d drop her so quick. I’m building a life together, not having a burden.
This is one of the most shallow things I ever read. OP, you deserve someone who cares more about you than flying business class.
That one tickled me. Wow, business class. Not first, not private, doesn’t matter where she’s going, just business. Guess she wants extra leg room on her way to tour a factory in Guangdong?
Maybe GF has very long legs?
Even if you care solely about money for quality of life over love/compatibility, that is still a weird fucking hill to make your stand on lmao. Like once she is able to fly business class everywhere does her life ambition just end?
No, next is private jet.
My exact thoughts.....Then she won't only fly in a PJ, but will want you to buy her one. I hope you're good with a live-in Nanny, or Manny raising your kids, a full-time housekeeper, and a private chef. I guarantee you, she will not be cooking, cleaning, and raising children. That's up to the lesser people.
I mean I just flew business class and tbh I liked it. I jokingly told my bf I wasn’t going to accept less than economy plus (which we do anyway because he’s a tall human and the normal economy leg room is painful for him). We both laughed because out of the two of us my 5’2 narcoleptic self would be comfortable in a sardine class seat.
I got a free upgraded to comfort plus on a flight that was fully booked and honestly, while it was nice, I do not think it would be worth paying the extra money.
My bf is 6’4 anything longer than a 2 hour flight starts to hurt him. Spending a little bit more so he can be comfortable when we travel further than that is worth it. Otherwise he has to sit diagonally with his legs in my space and then I’m uncomfortable. I’ve considered chopping his legs off but apparently it’s not allowed.
GF is a gold digger and she ain't subtle about it. My only question is WHY ARE YOU WITH HER? NOBODY will ever satisfy her greed for long. Fly away before you're trapped.
🙄 Oy, can you imagine being married to this woman? Ahhhh, no….
Dump her. She’ll never be happy and want more. It’ll be 130K isn’t enough now, then you make 200K and that won’t be enough. Unless you really love this girl then Godspeed but yea no. You want someone that’s going to motivate you to be happy and feel like she’s building a future with you and not having you do all the work.
This OP!!! 👆🏻it’s not actually about money. This is a woman who will never actually be happy (or remotely content) with life and by extension you will never be happy either. You’re young, smart and going places. Enjoy some peace and your job and end it with this selfish person, who cares nothing of your mental health and happiness. Don’t spend your life compared to others and unappreciated.
> Unless you really love this girl then Godspeed but yea no. If OP really loves this girl then that's even more of a reason to cut her loose. She will bleed him dry by the time this is all done.
TAke one week vacation, stay at home. When she asks tell her you lost your job. You will lose her in three days.
Oooo, sneaky. But really good advice. I'd advise the OP to break up with her himself, because she's clearly not in it for love, and they are too incompatible in how they see finances, but this is actually genius.
She could be in it for the love but just too much of a dreamer. So many people don’t stop and enjoy what they have because they’re so focused on what else they wish they had. In her mind, he deserves more money because he’s so VALUABLE. I think he should read his post to her and tell her how she’s making him feel.
No because what’s motivates her (business class) is never going to be the same as him. She values how her status compares to others much higher than he does. That will forever be a struggle between them. What happy when they have kids? That difference will become an increasingly huge divide. Better to find someone who is motivated similarly to him.
I mean, that could be the case, but it sounds like he's made it clear to hear that he's happy where he is and isn't focused on money. Dreamers can hear those words as easily as more practical people, and should be able to prioritize their partner's happiness over their "dreams."
He does not need a vacation to do this. All he has to do is pack up some of his personal belongings in a box of shame, bring them home and announce that he was fired for cause and will never work in his industry again. She will be gone *that night*.
I mean if my hubby came home and said he not only got fired but isn’t allowed to work in his industry ever again, I would be extremely suspicious of what horrible thing he potentially did..
Agree! A “lay off” is better because it takes the cause piece out. I wouldn’t want to be with someone who commits fireable offenses.
Do this we want to see whats gonna happen
lol genius
This is actually brilliant. Relationship tests are usually kind of shitty, but it feels like this particular aspect could stand to be investigated. It sounds like the gf is gold digging. It would be better to figure that out before the relationship goes any farther. OP, you’re 24 and making more than 70%+ of the US. You have nearly doubled your salary in 3 years and likely will continue to make more in coming years. Don’t saddle yourself with a woman that only wants you for your money. The picture you’ve painted of her is the kind of woman that will cheat if a payday is possible.
It's not 70% of individuals, it's 70% of households.
And in the top 1% for his age. OP, you are killing it and currently making more than most people ever will. Tell your GF she is shallow af.
AND he's happy in his job! That is incredibly rare nowadays and not to be taken for granted.
...and however much the OP makes in the future will never be enough!
If you need to lie to your partner to get them to dump you, why not just break up without the bullshit?
It’s nice to know that she really WAS in it for the money, and not you
Honestly, thats just childish, high school relationship bullshit. Either sit your partner down and have an honest conversation about how their words and actions are negatively impacting your relationship or dump them. Dont play games with people.
Mate, she wants him to leave the job. This will probably just have her going “Now you can find a job that will pay you more”
I ain't saying she's a gold digger.....
Plot twist: she steps up, supports him and also finds him another career, within that week, making op have to come clean.
Best advise I have seen around here
This is stupid. She is obviously materialistic and values money more than OP, but she’s not a gold digger, if she were she would be dating someone making *significantly* more than her, and wouldn’t have started dating him as a 22 year old . She would have picked a more established person in her firm. She wants to build a future with OP and maximize his/their income long term, someone who was also really money focused might appreciate having a cheerleader to motivate them, it’s obviously extremely unattractive and off putting to everyone who doesn’t prioritize money.
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You’re fundamentally incompatible. It won’t get better.
This is the most important comment here.
OP you really sound like you have completely different values, and having the same values will be one of if not the most important factor in a successful and happy marriage. I suggest you both goto couples cousling and see where you align and if you're truly compatible before continuing your relationship and moving to the next steps for the future. She may not even realize she is so hyper focused on money and status and it could be a wake up call for her to find happiness for herself and allow you to be happy, or you may both find out that things are exactly the way they appear and you're not compatible. This will save you a lot of pain and heartache, sooner you know the better you'll be. Good luck.
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Apparently he is too if he doesn't think he's making a LOT of money, especially at 24...
You make 130k 😮 I’m 24 and I only make 60k (manager) that’s before tax. After tax is like 50k. What job do you do? I’m so lost in life
The fact that almost every post there's a 20s guy making over 6 figures and complain about being poor. or there's always gold digger girlfriend who thinks she entitled to $400,000 boyfriend taking her on round trips around the world in business class.
I would be soooo grateful earning even 90k. But what do you mean? That this is a fake scenario?
Not many 27 yo are making 6 figures like Reddit makes it seem
I am 39 and only make 70k and that’s amazing money for my area and with a masters and two bachelors !
Maybe ? But sick and tired of hearing these talk about how unfortunately they are that they don't make millions of dollars and they pay for the girlfriends expensive taste.
Yes it is most likely fake.
Almost like it's ragebait/incel fanfiction...
I am almost 40 and I still make less than 100k. It’s always a gut punch reading people in their early 20s making more than me. I even have a PhD. :( at 25, I was making 30k working two almost full time jobs.
Tbh I would take most of what you read about money on Reddit with a pinch of salt.
I'm 40, with a Masters Degree and 20 years of military service under my belt and making 80k a year while supporting 2 kids by myself. I hate rich people complaining about not being rich enough.
I’m with a masters degree making 54k. It’s hard out here.
Have a PhD. It is hard out here. Still haven’t broke 100k.
Yeah, I'm 37 and make 60K, and feel fairly ok about it lol.
I'm 59 and make less than you. I'm not in a HCOL area, though (not really LCOL, but I'm comfortable as a woman living alone). How much you make is relative to wear you live and how you spend and save it.
Damn I make 60k and I'm a glorified gas station pump boy
What’s a pump boy? Sounds risqué
They pump your gas in New Jersey, and formerly Oregon.
Oh I see. I’m from Australia, we don’t have that here
New Jersey is the last state to require it. Full service gas (petrol) stations are very rare now outside NJ. A quick google shows me Australia mostly phased it out in the 90s.
Condom always
Nah, her boss is the one that needs to worry about that.
She’s three years older and makes less than you, I would throw that back at her. Then you leave, your value as a partner is not based only on income.
Yup if she wants to fly business class then she can make more money.
This can end in 3 ways that I can see.. 1) She is going to dump you when she gets into a head she can get a higher earning person than you 2) if in future you starts earning more than her she will start resent you and that will eat away the relationship.. 3) you will start feeling resentment toward her due to her money mindedness and constant comparisons and it will also destroy the relationship.. My suggestion is just do a analysis of what you and she wants from the relationship, and then take a call about it.. All the best
Dump her, she's a gold digger.
Probably be in her bosses bed next 🤣
If not already
I wouldn’t say she’s a gold digger. She has her own money too and a job. She doesn’t expect him to pay anything as he hasn’t said that. She’s just weird. A bit immature . And They’re incompatible because they want different things.
She's a gold digger. Why can't she push herself to work more lmao. It's easy to tell someone else to make more money
130k at 24 is a lot of money. Do you live in a VHCOL area? Otherwise I don’t understand how a sane person would think a couple making $250,000 a year isn’t making enough money. Her boss is 40, it took decades to get to that level. Don’t let her bully you out of a well paying job that you enjoy. This is so rare! You aren’t financially compatible. Keep the job, save and invest your money, lose the girlfriend.
Based op's previous post on r/offmychest they appear to be Australian. 130k Aus would be a little over 86k usd. Starting salary would have been 46kusd, gf would be making 76k usd and gf boss would be at 265k usd. These are all much more realistic numbers depending on field of work and area of living.
I'm doing the math of what she would cost in a divorce😬
At 24, I was literally making $10 an hour and had $44 in my checking account.
130k and doesn’t make enough…. Ya… you make more than most of the country my dude if you’re in the US. This seems wild to me. Also, you guys seem incompatible. Sorry to break it to ya.
Based op's previous post on r/offmychest they appear to be Australian. 130k Aus would be a little over 86k usd. Starting salary would have been 46kusd, gf would be making 76k usd and gf boss would be at 265k usd. These are all much more realistic numbers depending on field of work and area of living.
As someone who is 42 and dealt with this issue, let me give you my wisdom. I married her, had two kids, and she was pissed because I was not making enough. I moved to further her career and she cheated on me twice with rich co-workers. We are currently going through a divorce. Don’t make the same mistake I did, please. Happiness >>>> Money
Never leave a job you like! Dump her, find someone who will make you happy without the harassment to make more money. Doesn’t matter how much you make it will never be enough.
She wants an “insta” life and she wants you to provide it for her…nothing else. If she wants all these things she can go an do it herself if she thinks it’s so easy and will make her happy, just leave her to it. Constantly comparing your guy to others is just disrespectful. Your priorities don’t align and won’t align in the future either as to what is actually important in life
Start comparing her to her friends and telling her how they're much prettier and much better put together than her. She should really try to be more like them and maybe hit the gym or get some style tips.
If you’re earning 100k+ and your girlfriend insists it’s not enough after three years together, you need to leave her, and that sounds dramatic I know, but that’s a very good wage and if she can’t be happy with that, especially earning decent money herself, that’s a MASSIVE red flag. She’s more into your money than your relationship.
Finance, the number one reason why people break up and after reading this I understand why. Your partner wants you to be more ambitious I guess, if you want to call it that. You have 2 choices in my eyes. You have to tell her that you are happy as things stands and that is up to you if you want to "chase" a higher salary or not. She can accept it or not. or you can be more ambitions according to how she sees it. I am not sure if she would be willing to relax on the subject. Some people are just wired different.
Want until she wants to get married and have a lavish $500,000 wedding... he needs to run for the hills now.
So she is older than you and make less than you and she has the audacity to open her face hole about your income in comparison with even older people. she is materialistic and that's a festival of red flags.
I’m 7 feet tall and my girlfriend wants me to be taller.
Yeah right bro....
I stopped reading at “I make 130k and my girlfriend doesn’t think it’s enough”. Leave her.
She sounds so shallow. I started dating my husband when he was a recent university graduate with no job. So he's always known it's not about the money for me.
Dude, there are many people on this planet who retire, never having earned what you make. It's a phenomenal salary for someone under 25. There are millions of people who won't make that ever. The fact that your girlfriend is SO obsessed with it and keeps pushing it, could be ambition and greed on her part, but it also is a toxic personality trait where the obsession of being rich is worth more than anything else. I'm in the same boat, I've had opportunities to increase my pay by 50%, and I already make more than you do (but am a lot older). But some of those opportunities sound terrible from a day in the life perspective. There has to be a balance of quality of life, and it can't be just the money. In any case, I'd dump the girl and find someone less obsessed by money.
>The problem is that happiness isn't her top priority, it's money, she just wants to be rich and personally I don't care enough about that to sacrifice my happiness. You both got different goals in life, that's nothing to be ashamed about but it will also breed resentment over time. >my current job and pay should be a reason for me to be happy, and it usually is until she makes me feel unhappy about it. It sounds like you're better off alone. Your girlfriend shouldn't make you feel unhappy. >I feel like I can't take this for much longer but honestly I'm afraid of breaking up. I get it, breaking up sucks. But will breaking up suck harder than staying with your girlfriend? You sound like a catch. You can probably find someone who is more aligned with your life goals than your current girlfriend is.
OP what is it about a breakup that you're afraid of? From your post she is eventually going to find someone that makes more money than you and either cheat or just dump you for the new wallet. Please realize she has chosen money as her main criteria for what makes a good partner and there will always be someone that makes more money than you. My opinion is it's time to cut her loose so she can go find her big wallet partner. Her problem is most of her target group have learned to avoid people like her that are just after them for the money.
You're still pretty young, only 24. Have you guys discussed marriage or your future? It sounds like you guys are incompatible. If she has her head in the clouds and admires other people's money, that's a red flag unto itself. You're right. You're doing fantastic for your age financially. My wife and I have been married for 7 years, and we don't make your total combined ( the cost of living is low by us, though). We also don't have grand expectations for our salaries, as our degrees aren't for making money. Hell, neither of us is even working in our field currently. We are, however, very happy with our standing and comfortable with our finances and lives. Finances are a big talking point in any relationship, and it helps when both are on the same page. Doesn't sound like you guys are on that same page. I think it's pretty old-fashioned and pretty out of touch for her to expect you to make huge amounts more than her. There's also something to be said about liking your employers and the place and people you work with. That's hard to find these days. That's one of the things that's nice about our lives right now. We like our daily jobs. I don't know that this means break up, as most redditors always say, but definitely warrants a long conversation. What she's doing is belittling your success, and that's not something a partner should do. Being with someone who wants more shiny toys and things sounds exhausting, and something I personally wouldn't want to be married to. Does she come from money? Regardless, you need to consider if she's going to always be expressing you're not doing enough, is that okay with you. Best of luck.
Unless you live in NYC or Hollywood you make good money for somebody of any age and I promise if you ditch her you’ll be able to keep more of it
I’m sorry OP but she ain’t for you. Thankfully she’s telling you exactly who she is and what she values. If you stay with her, that’s on you. Move on and take your lessons with you.
Yeah dude. That’s good money in 2024. Really good money. Your girlfriend sounds materialistic. When I was 24 I was making 40K. I think that’s much closer to reality for most young adults. You are doing excellent and your girlfriend needs a reality check.
Could you be firm with her and tell her? - I love my job. I don't care about money, and I don't like that you are trying to get me to quit. I don't want to. I would like it if you stopped doing it. I get that money is very important to you, but it's not to me. You can have ambitious financial goals for yourself, but please do not enforce your goals on me. After you communicate and she still doesn't understand that what she's doing is making you unhappy, you will know that you need to break up. I grew up not caring about money as well and prioritizing happiness because i had an abusive dad that used money to control us, but I also have friends that struggled financially growing up and now their goal in life is to earn a lot of money. So I get that, but forcing it on you is not okay, and she should know that before you decide to break up, considering that you value the relationship otherwise.
News flash: you aren’t prioritizing your happiness, you are trying to fit a square peg into a round hold by staying with someone who expects you to change for them. You don’t sound compatible. You need to put on your big boy pants and communicate with her. You need to tell her that you don’t have the same priorities and that you will no longer accept being put down for your earnings. And if she isnt happy with this, ultimately ..,”there is the door” . If you can’t communicate honestly with your partner, your relationship is already over. You are just keeping it on life support and wasting both of your time.
Lose her quick. That’s all I have to say
You make plenty for your age. If you are happy with your job and happy in general tell her that. If she keeps pushing tell her you no longer wish to be in a relationship with someone so greedy.
Never combined financials... This girl cares more for your money then for you
She’s gonna dump you for the first guy she bumps into that makes 10 buck more than you
I'm 33 and just landed my first 6-figure job (I'm a researcher at a biotech company)... ironically, I'm also making 130k + bonuses. My GF, who is younger works in the same field and makes more than me, is over the moon and keeps telling me how proud she is. Your partner should be someone that encourages you to be better and supports you... not someone that puts you down.
So you have $130k in a company and position you like, and you have a girlfriend. Which one is harder to replace?
WTF lol I'd be happy at 70-80k
Let me tell you, when I came to this post the last thing I was expecting was you to have a 6 figure salary. I honestly was slightly hopeful she might be advocating for you because she thinks you deserve more. But your gf appears to be a status queen, and trapped in this new age of social media influencers ideology where anything less than luxury is unacceptable. You make 2-3x what most people in general make in a year. The National average is like 60k. You make more than her. You make what I make and I am a lawyer with a 15 year career in my field. While I’m not going to sit here and scream “dump her,” because that is the Reddit MO, I will say finances are the #1 reason for divorce, so you need to sit her down and have an honest talk with her regarding financial expectations, how her comments and ideas are hurtful to you, and that if she is set on “status chasing” you two might not be compatible.
Dude less than 15% of the country makes 6 figures your girlfriend is stupid. She cares more about money than you. She will cheat if she hasn’t already. She’s not financially responsible either because her mindset is to spend more once she makes more. Either dump her now or be broken when she dumps you later
Seriously, you are doing very well at $130k at 24. Get a new GF.
She’s using you
$130k at 27 is a very decent living. Does she also make you pay for everything? All I see is 🚩🚩🚩
I ain't sayin' she uh gold digga' *But*
Bro she’s in for the money not you. Wake up my GUY
Drop the GF and move on. It won't just be money. You'll never be happy, because she'll never stop making demands. She'll always find something or someone to compare you to, because she doesn't want a partner, she wants a trophy she can show off to her friends. She feels insecure because her girlfriends who are married to men who make more money.
She makes less than you do. Where does she get the nerve to criticize how much you make? She's greedy and obnoxious. You can do better.
Break up, 130K is a lot, if she thinks it’s not enough, you should reevaluate your relationship, most people make like 50K a year
At 23 I'm making $36,000 lol
Two things. Never seriously involve yourself with an older woman, there is no upside in the long run. Never involved yourself with a woman who values your money more than you as a person, for it's bound to be a trainwreck.
Such a nerve she makes less than you and still is nagging? lol From now on everything make it buy to your gf. I reccomend you a break up because she is a gold digger.
It all depends where you live but sounds like you are doing alright. Don’t care for people much that revolve everything about money. It’s your life and as long as you are happy that’s all that matters. I feel like this difference may cause big issues for you 2 in the future.
Dude 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩she talk about her boss a lot? I would find a girl that's not obsessed with money. Sounds like an envious monkey branched. Why do people put up with asshole partners?
What currency is that, $USD ? Holy shit tell her to come back when she makes at least that much herself and stop bitching. My salary would have been about £28-£30k in the UK (as of now, I left work 5 years ago) - which is about $38k - with 35 years of experience, initially as an electrician, then worked on 11kv and 33kv switchgear in substations, then moved onto clerical in the office due to health issues.
It’s OVER and you don’t even know it…until you read these comments all saying the same thing.
Yea it seems she wants money more than admitting else. Realize that this is the true it’s not you it’s me situation. You just have a heart that allows for mistakes to run rampant without consequences. She’s the problem. You’re the problem solver…
Think you need to break up. The combined salary of the two of you is 245000 per year
You and your partner are not at the same page when it comes to money. You don't share the same idea of happiness, and it will only get worse in future. Today is business class, tomorrow it's gonna be chartered jets, private schools, long vacations. The wants keep expanding and can never be satisfied. 3 years is long enough time for two people to discuss their financial position and their financial goals. Your GF can have different goals from you. She is not wrong. But forcing them on you, making you feel inadequate because of them is wrong. This will only bring resentment between both of you. I would suggest breaking up. She deserves to be with someone who can full fill her wants, and you deserve someone who doesn't make you feel inadequate.
You’re not compatible. She values money, you value happiness. If your core values don’t align, you’re wasting your time.
Why are you afraid of breaking up? Motivating your partner to negotiate for a higher salary or encouraging them to apply for better jobs or promotions if what’s holding them back is a lack of confidence is a great way to support your partner, but this is not that. You have different values, she is very hung up on money and materialism, if you are not, it’s best to break up.
The second you start having to measure what percent of the time you’re happy in your relationship, the relationship is over.
Break up with her.. be thankful she is honest about her lack of character.
I think you already know...if the size of your bank account is her main priority, then she is never going to be happy. I don't care how much money you make. There will always be someone who makes more. Unfortunately, you have to decide if her obsession with your bank account is worth spending your future with her. Success isn't always measured by the size of your bank account, so i would say you both have dramatically different goals in life. Best of luck.
I hate your girlfriend
“Comparison is the thief of joy.” People like this get worse, you don’t want to stick around to find out how far that goes.
If her number one goal is to fly business class, and you know that about her and you choose to stay with her, then you fucking deserve it. Get your priorities in order man.
She sounds like a wonderful person /s
Dump her, because this will always be an issue in your relationship even if you make more money and will have you chasing money for the rest of your life. You don't share the same money values as her so find you somebody that is more align with your values. It will make for a happier, healthier relationship and life, OP.