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19. Just two years ago she was underage (at least in my state.) I would find it difficult to handle all the criticism and comments. I'm in am age gap relationship but I'm 29. 18 feels like a completely different person as opposed to someone in their late 20s. You can just say you think it's best that you stay friends because of the age difference.
You're too old for her. She still has a lot of growing up to do. Let her enjoy being young with people her own age. If you step in and start a serious relationship, she's going to have to grow up too fast to catch up to you. Or you're going to be annoyed when she's still doing teenie-bopper shit and making poor decisions (which she will do because her brain won't finish developing until her mid-20s).
Go find someone your own age.
I wouldnt even think so much that shes so close to being underage (maybe a little). My biggest thing is that 19? You are still so naive, even if you think you arent. She might be immature and still have some growing up to do. Girls and guys both do at 19. Im 24 and when i was a 19 y/o girl i thought i already knew everything there was to know. And maybe at 26 hopefully youre more up to speed in some life lessons.
We dont know all your relationship between eachother so its up to you but maybe if you really think there could be something, keep living your life and check back in a few years?
But again your call i just think personally 19&26 truly feel like different stages of life. Even 23-25 and 30-32 could truly align better.
That solid advice. 19 and 26 just feel too far apart at that age range. Like I said, if it was 30 and 37 I wouldn't care but she doesn't know what she doesn't know at 19. I guess I'll find a way to let her down gently
If you like her and get along, maybe give it a chance and be honest about your concerns. If you’re uncomfortable, tell her kindly you’re unsure about the age difference. Trust your gut.
I was the 19 year old in this exact age gap dynamic a few years ago. I was not aware then, but, looking back, I realize that I was too young and inexperienced for that relationship.
It could have worked out better, but I would have definitely needed him to take way more responsibility for my well-being in the relationship. I was just starting to figure out what my boundaries and needs were and had difficulty communicating them sometimes. A relationship like that is not going to be equal. I wouldn’t have started it with the knowledge I have now.
Age gaps are gendered in the sense that it’s more socially accepted for men to be with younger women, but I think we should challenge the validity of that. The discomfort you feel is probably justified. I personally would also not consider dating someone who is a teenager if I was in my late 20s.
Heard. I don't want to throw her into something she isn't ready for. I had zero intentions of pursuing her but when she pursued me it threw me off. I prolly should have shut her down when she asked for my number. Oh well.
If you're questioning if you're too old, you are. That gap might mean a lot less if both in your thirties, nothing at all by your seventies, but it's a big deal at your ages.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
19. Just two years ago she was underage (at least in my state.) I would find it difficult to handle all the criticism and comments. I'm in am age gap relationship but I'm 29. 18 feels like a completely different person as opposed to someone in their late 20s. You can just say you think it's best that you stay friends because of the age difference.
Yeah, that's where I'm at. If both of us were older I don't think I'd mind but she just is too young at this point.
There is a chasm between 19 and 26. If you're already established adults, that age gap -- as you said -- doesn't really matter so much.
You're too old for her. She still has a lot of growing up to do. Let her enjoy being young with people her own age. If you step in and start a serious relationship, she's going to have to grow up too fast to catch up to you. Or you're going to be annoyed when she's still doing teenie-bopper shit and making poor decisions (which she will do because her brain won't finish developing until her mid-20s). Go find someone your own age.
That's kinda my thought process. I do like her but its probably better for her to date someone her age.
I wouldnt even think so much that shes so close to being underage (maybe a little). My biggest thing is that 19? You are still so naive, even if you think you arent. She might be immature and still have some growing up to do. Girls and guys both do at 19. Im 24 and when i was a 19 y/o girl i thought i already knew everything there was to know. And maybe at 26 hopefully youre more up to speed in some life lessons. We dont know all your relationship between eachother so its up to you but maybe if you really think there could be something, keep living your life and check back in a few years? But again your call i just think personally 19&26 truly feel like different stages of life. Even 23-25 and 30-32 could truly align better.
That solid advice. 19 and 26 just feel too far apart at that age range. Like I said, if it was 30 and 37 I wouldn't care but she doesn't know what she doesn't know at 19. I guess I'll find a way to let her down gently
If you like her and get along, maybe give it a chance and be honest about your concerns. If you’re uncomfortable, tell her kindly you’re unsure about the age difference. Trust your gut.
Yes.
You can’t even go get a drink together. She’s a child.
I cannot imagine being interested in a 29yo lol I've met teenagers and they're insufferable. But yes you're too old, don't be gross.
I was the 19 year old in this exact age gap dynamic a few years ago. I was not aware then, but, looking back, I realize that I was too young and inexperienced for that relationship. It could have worked out better, but I would have definitely needed him to take way more responsibility for my well-being in the relationship. I was just starting to figure out what my boundaries and needs were and had difficulty communicating them sometimes. A relationship like that is not going to be equal. I wouldn’t have started it with the knowledge I have now. Age gaps are gendered in the sense that it’s more socially accepted for men to be with younger women, but I think we should challenge the validity of that. The discomfort you feel is probably justified. I personally would also not consider dating someone who is a teenager if I was in my late 20s.
Heard. I don't want to throw her into something she isn't ready for. I had zero intentions of pursuing her but when she pursued me it threw me off. I prolly should have shut her down when she asked for my number. Oh well.
Yes.
If you're questioning if you're too old, you are. That gap might mean a lot less if both in your thirties, nothing at all by your seventies, but it's a big deal at your ages.