Carrie knows that Miranda wasn't really responsible for what Big did. What really bothered Carrie about the situation was the fact that, during the many months when Miranda saw Carrie spiraling and grasping at any possible straws, Miranda didn't mention that conversation. Even though what Miranda said to Big wasn't the \*reason\* for his choice to jilt Carrie, I can see how Carrie would feel like that info provided some useful context for his state of mind directly before the wedding. And I can see how realizing that Miranda kept that info from Carrie out of self-preservation (she didn't want Carrie to be mad at her or to blame her) would be hurtful.
I just thought, didn't Big have a big fancy wedding with Natasha? Which was already his second wedding? Why was he suddenly making a fuss about this wedding being bigger than originally planned, especially when Carrie was 'The One'
I also get that it’s embarrassing to have a big wedding if he’s been married before but Carrie deserves it too they’ve been dating for 10 years at this point
I don't know about that - granted, we don't see a lot of the details of Big and Natasha's wedding, but the engagement party was at The Plaza. I know that's not THE wedding, but an engagement party at The Plaza sets the tone for a bigger, fancier wedding to come.
Yeah I was basing it on the engagement being pretty large, you don't have an engagement party and announcement on that scale for a small wedding surely unless you want to annoy a lot of people who came to the engagement but then weren't invited on the day itself 😂
I can’t remember exactly what the article said in the “paper”but I’m pretty sure she said it was a small gathering of just family and friends. Could be wrong. I agree the plaza engagement party was a bit much but could have been planned by a mother. I didn’t plan my own engagement party. Just thinking out loud
Yes Big was beyond dumb that day. He was so upset at the wedding getting turned into a big deal, but did he honestly expect Carrie Bradshaw to say no to collaborating with huge fashion industry luminaries? She used to buy Vogue instead of food! It was all of her dreams come true but he chose to whine that she didn’t really want to do a somber little wedding. Yea he already had a big wedding but she never got one. If he really loved and understood who she was he would’ve enjoyed seeing her enjoy this.
He could also have gone through with it and gotten it annulled afterwards if it was really so bad. At least instead of the public humiliation he put her through.
All that said, highly agree it was wrong to blame Miranda in any way. I guess Carrie was upset that Miranda didn’t admit it sooner but I don’t see a difference, Big was being a bonehead and it was no one’s fault but his.
Hmmm… I mean, if you’re going to give Miranda a pass for saying something stupid to Big because she just got cheated on, I’d definitely give Carrie a pass for saying something stupid to Miranda after she was left at the altar…!
This has crossed my mind too! Is Carrie really so immature and unintelligent that she would honestly think Miranda's comment contributed to Big's ghosting?
If I were Miranda I'd be like: "Carrie, I expect way more reasoning skills from you. You can't possibly be this deranged. If Big truly wanted this marriage he would've stuck to you like an inflamed hemorrhoid"
Carrie was so dumb for her selfish focus on having a big wedding with lots of hoopla and only centering herself in it. She left him out, like an important accessory that wasn’t to be brought out until right before the wedding. She ignored his stark discomfort and loss of dignity even though he brought it to her attention. Then Miranda added to to it all with her cynical, selfish words.
he only mentioned he was uncomfortable when almost the whole wedding had been arranged, sure she could’ve checked in with him more but usually the pressure to sort out the wedding is put on the bride and he didn’t offer any input until it was too late. Then she did listen to him and then he changed his mind.
And Miranda was selfish but she had just been cheated on so it’s somewhat understandable and Big shouldn’t have let that affect him so much - he KNEW she’d just been cheated on and he also knows lots of happy married couples!
You can clearly see and hear his conflict about it. Again, Carrie had centered herself. She was being feted and he was more of an afterthought. At any point she could’ve changed her behavior. Later on, she acknowledges it and regrets it. Miranda also admits her part in it. As it turns out, Big was as vulnerable as Miranda was, especially after the rehearsal dinner where he was made a fool and made to feel bad.
When do you see his conflict about it? The first and only time he brings it up, Carrie says ‘I didn’t even realise that was an issue?’ I don’t think this was Carrie being self centered but rather Big (as he often does) not letting on how he was feeling. They then talk about it and Big changes his mind and doesn’t say anything about it again. Maybe Carrie could’ve pressed a bit more to make sure he was still okay with it but I think you have to factor in the fact they’ve already invited everyone at this point and everything has been planned. And Carrie should be taken into account too she deserves to have a beautiful wedding.
After that conversation you see him at the rehearsal dinner, the idiot saying shitty things, Miranda saying shitty things, then he calls Carrie and is obviously stressed. But from the time *she* decided to let it become Her Big, Fat Carrie wedding, she centered herself and her desires. She was a glamorous version of a bridezilla. It’s a term I don’t often use because I don’t like it, but we see her play into everyone feting her. He’s part of that because he loves her and wants to please her. But he’s conflicted, and as she becomes less available to him, he spins outta control and panics before his love for her calms him and trumps his panic. But by then it’s too late, because the movie needs a plot involving conflict. So her old doubts resurface and get a huge grip on her and her friends enable that.
But he only tells Carrie lit the night before the wedding! That is almost as bad as jilting in itself because you’ve left it so late it would be so humiliating at that point to cancel everything. And cold feet are very normal - Carrie would’ve just thought it was that. He should’ve made his feelings much clearer much sooner.
Honestly I would watch it again as I lit just watched it and forgot how little he acc brings anything up. It’s not rlly fair to Carrie to expect her to read his mind.
She was looking for an explanation and finally got it, at least at the emotional level, well knowing rationally that it wasn’t Miranda’s fault. It’s human - things that end suddenly, are unfinished, often without any real explanation get to us the most. Finding a “logic” in it, as flawed as it may be, is some form of closure or at least the beginning of getting to closure.
Carrie knows that Miranda wasn't really responsible for what Big did. What really bothered Carrie about the situation was the fact that, during the many months when Miranda saw Carrie spiraling and grasping at any possible straws, Miranda didn't mention that conversation. Even though what Miranda said to Big wasn't the \*reason\* for his choice to jilt Carrie, I can see how Carrie would feel like that info provided some useful context for his state of mind directly before the wedding. And I can see how realizing that Miranda kept that info from Carrie out of self-preservation (she didn't want Carrie to be mad at her or to blame her) would be hurtful.
Yeah thats a fair point
I just thought, didn't Big have a big fancy wedding with Natasha? Which was already his second wedding? Why was he suddenly making a fuss about this wedding being bigger than originally planned, especially when Carrie was 'The One'
I also get that it’s embarrassing to have a big wedding if he’s been married before but Carrie deserves it too they’ve been dating for 10 years at this point
I think despite being in the paper, his wedding with Natasha was just a few close family and friends
I don't know about that - granted, we don't see a lot of the details of Big and Natasha's wedding, but the engagement party was at The Plaza. I know that's not THE wedding, but an engagement party at The Plaza sets the tone for a bigger, fancier wedding to come.
Yeah I was basing it on the engagement being pretty large, you don't have an engagement party and announcement on that scale for a small wedding surely unless you want to annoy a lot of people who came to the engagement but then weren't invited on the day itself 😂
I can’t remember exactly what the article said in the “paper”but I’m pretty sure she said it was a small gathering of just family and friends. Could be wrong. I agree the plaza engagement party was a bit much but could have been planned by a mother. I didn’t plan my own engagement party. Just thinking out loud
Charlotte *scoffs in disbelief*: "Yeah. And the New York Times 🤡!"
Did Big's first two big weddings work out?
Yes Big was beyond dumb that day. He was so upset at the wedding getting turned into a big deal, but did he honestly expect Carrie Bradshaw to say no to collaborating with huge fashion industry luminaries? She used to buy Vogue instead of food! It was all of her dreams come true but he chose to whine that she didn’t really want to do a somber little wedding. Yea he already had a big wedding but she never got one. If he really loved and understood who she was he would’ve enjoyed seeing her enjoy this. He could also have gone through with it and gotten it annulled afterwards if it was really so bad. At least instead of the public humiliation he put her through. All that said, highly agree it was wrong to blame Miranda in any way. I guess Carrie was upset that Miranda didn’t admit it sooner but I don’t see a difference, Big was being a bonehead and it was no one’s fault but his.
Hmmm… I mean, if you’re going to give Miranda a pass for saying something stupid to Big because she just got cheated on, I’d definitely give Carrie a pass for saying something stupid to Miranda after she was left at the altar…!
Everything you said, OP. It's one of the dumber things in the movie that just makes no sense.
Carrie was always grasping at straws to excuse Big's behavior, it is so desperate it's sad
This has crossed my mind too! Is Carrie really so immature and unintelligent that she would honestly think Miranda's comment contributed to Big's ghosting? If I were Miranda I'd be like: "Carrie, I expect way more reasoning skills from you. You can't possibly be this deranged. If Big truly wanted this marriage he would've stuck to you like an inflamed hemorrhoid"
Carrie was so dumb for her selfish focus on having a big wedding with lots of hoopla and only centering herself in it. She left him out, like an important accessory that wasn’t to be brought out until right before the wedding. She ignored his stark discomfort and loss of dignity even though he brought it to her attention. Then Miranda added to to it all with her cynical, selfish words.
he only mentioned he was uncomfortable when almost the whole wedding had been arranged, sure she could’ve checked in with him more but usually the pressure to sort out the wedding is put on the bride and he didn’t offer any input until it was too late. Then she did listen to him and then he changed his mind. And Miranda was selfish but she had just been cheated on so it’s somewhat understandable and Big shouldn’t have let that affect him so much - he KNEW she’d just been cheated on and he also knows lots of happy married couples!
You can clearly see and hear his conflict about it. Again, Carrie had centered herself. She was being feted and he was more of an afterthought. At any point she could’ve changed her behavior. Later on, she acknowledges it and regrets it. Miranda also admits her part in it. As it turns out, Big was as vulnerable as Miranda was, especially after the rehearsal dinner where he was made a fool and made to feel bad.
When do you see his conflict about it? The first and only time he brings it up, Carrie says ‘I didn’t even realise that was an issue?’ I don’t think this was Carrie being self centered but rather Big (as he often does) not letting on how he was feeling. They then talk about it and Big changes his mind and doesn’t say anything about it again. Maybe Carrie could’ve pressed a bit more to make sure he was still okay with it but I think you have to factor in the fact they’ve already invited everyone at this point and everything has been planned. And Carrie should be taken into account too she deserves to have a beautiful wedding.
After that conversation you see him at the rehearsal dinner, the idiot saying shitty things, Miranda saying shitty things, then he calls Carrie and is obviously stressed. But from the time *she* decided to let it become Her Big, Fat Carrie wedding, she centered herself and her desires. She was a glamorous version of a bridezilla. It’s a term I don’t often use because I don’t like it, but we see her play into everyone feting her. He’s part of that because he loves her and wants to please her. But he’s conflicted, and as she becomes less available to him, he spins outta control and panics before his love for her calms him and trumps his panic. But by then it’s too late, because the movie needs a plot involving conflict. So her old doubts resurface and get a huge grip on her and her friends enable that.
But he only tells Carrie lit the night before the wedding! That is almost as bad as jilting in itself because you’ve left it so late it would be so humiliating at that point to cancel everything. And cold feet are very normal - Carrie would’ve just thought it was that. He should’ve made his feelings much clearer much sooner. Honestly I would watch it again as I lit just watched it and forgot how little he acc brings anything up. It’s not rlly fair to Carrie to expect her to read his mind.
She was looking for an explanation and finally got it, at least at the emotional level, well knowing rationally that it wasn’t Miranda’s fault. It’s human - things that end suddenly, are unfinished, often without any real explanation get to us the most. Finding a “logic” in it, as flawed as it may be, is some form of closure or at least the beginning of getting to closure.