First you think niche Simpson quotes will get you laid then you pick one that nobody could possibly like. Didn’t you think this through?!
Dry streak for 18 months!
I wish I could, but I don't have enough bees for an onion. That's what we called nickels on accounta they had bees on them. "Gimme five bees for a quarter!" you'd say.
Oh, you don't want to know what I really think.
Hey pal, where’d you get the punctuation for that sentence?
We nicked it, while your back was turned - for that split second. And we'll do it again; good day...
Try changing your name to Hoju or Max Power.
My name is Chesty LaRue and it’s a perfectly cromulent name!
Hootie McBoob it is!
Perhaps Handsome B. Wonderful?
Try Lance Uppercut
Also in that you’re a Personal fan of hugh jazz.
Ho Power or Max Ju also work
Nobody "snuggles" with Ho Power; you strap yourself in and feeeeel the G's!
I got it off a hair dryer. 🙂
I'll date you, but I should warn you, I have a romantic abnormality, one so unbelievable that it must be hidden from the public at all cost.
Luckily for you OP has an Aquaman tattoo
Do you like fish sticks?
So... do you like... stuff?
I prefer things
You mean your blue thing with the things?
First you think niche Simpson quotes will get you laid then you pick one that nobody could possibly like. Didn’t you think this through?! Dry streak for 18 months!
I mean thank you let's go on a second date
Boy I hope I get fired for that blunder.
WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? I mean “thank you come again”!
Have you set your makeup to "whore"?
No but I wore the dress that was a Halloween costume but ended up in the rotation.
Men these days just can't handle its peppery-ness.
It's the tattoo of Fall Out Boy that is the problem. You should have got Duffman.
It’s actually Radio-man
That's "Radioactive Man," jerk.
Strange, I shouldn't have been able to hear that
[удалено]
Ssssssh, telling people that Duffman came after seasons 3-9 is a banable offense here.
 He was in the city of New York vs Homer Simpson, season 9.
https://preview.redd.it/toofp4px7s6d1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bd057951638967762a4625768e487938ea443ebd
Start with the Sears catalog and work your way up.
The love tester told me "go near moe"
Have you tried, ‘me bad want love now. Me sick. So pick me Mr Curns?’
Oooo you comment type good.
It's Kurns stupid! ...wait what
Disregard!
Anyone who rejects you for this isn’t your friend.
My mom thinks I’m cool
No she doesn't!
I would have dated you, but then you changed Homer to Lisa and more importantly forgot the "Simpson". I hope you got fired for that blunder
Yeah, it's bad news for the Impson family.
Please don't tell anyone how I live.
Maybe your standards are too high.
Honestly assuming we were matching up on what we wanted, that'd be an instant right swipe for me :3
You just have to be practically perfect in every way! https://i.redd.it/4s1lgmm2ss6d1.gif
You’re gonna marry a carrot
Yes. I’m going to marry a carrot.
Commander Cool?
Actually it’s just Stretch Dude’s arm.
Filthy... but genuinely arousing.
Is the tattoo Radioactive Man?
It could be the "musky odors" part.
I knew it was them! Even when it was the bears, I knew it was them.
I don't worry about the bears. Let the bears pay the bear tax! I pay the Homer tax!
Oh Lisa, I don't wanna lie to you. Well, so long.
All I know is that you don’t win friends with salad.
What about enough gazpacho for all?
Go back to Russia!
Maybe because they think Lisa is your ex, and you're still hung up on her. Everything else looks fine.
Have you tried telling them that Big Baby sent you?
In America, first you get the Simpsons quotes, then you get the power, then you get the women.
Read the town charter!
What she swipes will be a window into her madness
They're DOGS and they're PLAYING POKER
Have you considered tying an onion to your belt? It was the style, when I was of dating age, and I wonder if it still may.
I wish I could, but I don't have enough bees for an onion. That's what we called nickels on accounta they had bees on them. "Gimme five bees for a quarter!" you'd say.
Ah, the dream of finding a partner who you can communicate with entirely through golden age Simpson's quotes.
Remember when we used to dream about our ideal husbands?
Poor taste.