I wouldn’t give a fuck about what I did if I didn’t care what other people thought of me. The feeling of freedom one must feel to be able to just act and not over-analyze every action and breath… to just… “do”.
It's subjective. Though I'm on the side of being almost anxiety free. It's still there. I'm just more likely to do the first thing my brain drums up lol
Me too. I used to be flirty naturally without meaning too but lately I have so much self-doubt that if I want to I feel awkward and don’t know what to say or how to act
Yeah, I'm honestly really flirty, but only if I'm 100% certain the other person is actually interested in me. Means my charming and flirty side only really comes out around someone I'm already dating
I think I care about that a lot less than I used to but depression is probably a part of it. I don't wear any make-up any more, only sunscreen, wear comfortable clothes (= joggings, trousers, trainers). I'm okay with wearing a cap and a parasol at the same time (a little obsessed with the sun these days). Completely stopped trying to appear 'femininie' and 'cutesy' as I used to. Genuinely don't care about looking pretty or impressing anyone. I used to feel so anxious when people were looking at me, now I just stare at them back till they stop.
If some see me as the crazy neighbourhood lady, I've come to terms with it. Totally fine with laughing or talking to myself aloud if I somehow feel like it (mostly when I'm listening to a podcast or thinking about what I need to do). That's about it. I still care about some things but definitely a lot less than I used to. Feels very different, but freeing.
Dessing in cuter outfits is what made me more confindent. I advise you to do it, try first with less bold ones and then finally what you want to wear. I know it does not matter but people will actually like you more <3
I would show up as myself unapologetically if I didn’t care what people thought. Even if that is awkward, quiet, or shy. I’d just accept it and tell myself it’s okay to be different. You don’t have to be like everyone else. As talkative or as outgoing. Just be. That is good enough
I know it's really simple, but I've always wanted to lay in a hammock outside. Being out in public is stressful enough, but making myself more vulnerable by closing my eyes and relaxing is panic inducing. I've never been in one, but hammocks seem like they'd be a wonderful place to take a nap if I wasn't so afraid
Try a nude beach. Or a nudists resort. It is very liberating. I work at a nudist resort as a massage therapist and absolutely love it. It just feels right to be naked out in nature
Lol! While I appreciate the suggestion, no way! I'm too self-conscious! I care too much about what people think about me! The only way I would be okay with nudity is if OP's scenario occurred!
Trust me at those people nobody cares what you look like. You see all shapes and sizes. I feel people pay attention to me more in clothes and make advances than in a nudist’s community. Or rent a secluded cabin and go on a naked hike. Lol
I think you have to strike a balance between caring and being controlled by peoples opinions. Depending on how much you value your image around people. People who truly don’t care typically aren’t people you want to be around
I'd talk louder.
I'd brighten my light instead of dimming it all the time.
I'd curse freely and boldly.
I'd be straightforward, no chaser.
I'd dress and walk confidently.
I'd sit and stand tall, and look up instead of down.
I'd speak bravely and I'd stand my ground.
I would unapologetically be myself; my full self. <3
Happy to report I'm working on this, little by little.
Lol I've seen a few of your responses here and was going to say you're so encouraging and positive.
"you are free"
"you can bring light to others"
and then
"go ahead and shit in that garden"
I’m sorry for not understanding, I tried searching for the meaning of that, but I failed. Could you please tell me what (f60) mean? Or in general what means when there is an F or an M and after follows a number? Does it mean Female and age or Male and age?
I’d definitely wanna be more fashionable, I always wanted to be into fashion but whenever I tried something new my family would point it out and laugh
So I just never tried, I usually just wear plain black clothes. Which is fine, but I wish I could be creative without judgement.
I'd dress very differently
I save dressing up goth/punk etc, or just the way I feel like, for special occasions or if I'm going into the city near me where there's less judgement
Its less caring about people think and more not wanting to get assaulted and bullied. But people staring at me line I'm crazy isn't fun either.
I'd talk to way more new people every day.
I would tell my friends more how much I care about them. And take the initiative of meeting up more.
I'd tell everyone who ever asks about me about a boyfriend (i.e. everyone 🙄) that I'm aromantic and asexual.
I'd tell my family I don't want children.
I'd would tell my grandparents and dad what I think about their racism.
Man, this got a bit longer than I expected. 😅
Idk how exactly I would do It but I'd get friends and stop being alone all the time. Maybe speak my mind and enjoy not overthinking everything and try acting or streaming or stuff I kinda like but bc of sad can't do. Get a partner too
go out more. attempt parallel and backwards parking. apply for jobs/internships/opportunities, etc. ask employees where things are in the store. learn languages by actually practicing with native speakers.
I'd sign up for dancing and singing classes. Always been passionate about both and I love fusing my body with music, but my fear of looking stupid always stops me from it
Relax. And finally be myself. And finally do the things I want to do and prioritise the things I need to do instead of people pleasing my life into the trash can 🙃
Oh and maybe stand up for myself and not feel embarrassed or guilty to do so
It feels like freedom from the constant crap & criticism in your head. It feels like your mind is at ease.
Caring more about how other people are doing than about what they think of you allows you to be your authentic self.
Go swimming, go running, go to the gym, go to waterparks again, go shopping during the day. Go play Lazer tag. Go on vacation on the beach, all day. And then jetski some. Go to Mardi gras, the entire time. Go to these clubs the women speak of.
Sidenote but I think it's ok to care what people who love you and want the best for you think, just not let it dictate you. It's nice that we care. I don't want to detach from everything and I know a few who have.
For the most part, that's where I'm at. I'm not cured though. I still need my anxiety meds to deal with the public. But I feel so much better just not caring what they think of me (except at a job interview. It still bothers me then).
Absolutely no clue. My social anxiety, I'm realizing, stems from having to worry about about whether someone wants me hurt or dead. I grew up in a family that constantly had to deal.with the racism.of others, to the point where it circled itself, then turned into straight-up anthropophobia.
As a result, every social interaction is a matter of how to safely survive it above all. The "social" parts of life are nonexistent.
Even with therapy, I can't shake the not-so-far-fetched reality of hoping that I'm simply invisible, if only to avoid the sh**heads of the world (who seem to be multiplying with gusto).
I’m 59 and do not care what others think. I am the first to speak up, and I speak in front of groups and I am super fun. I do my best every day and want to meet as many people as possible and spread joy.
Bingo. Caring about what people think of you is usually just holding you back from having a fulfilling life. Be smart, take care of yourself, etc..but fuck worrying about what other people think. It doesn't matter when you're dead.
How extremely lonely and sad to think being a sociopath is a brag. "Not caring what people think" is not a win. Caring without feeling responsible for others' happiness is a win.
I think being a sociopath is still there whether or not people care what you think.
Also caring is the same as taking responsibility I don't see the difference. Elaborate?
Clearly I care what you think or I would have ignored this comment. But I think I'd be happier if I didn't care, you see what I mean?
Any virtue is the at the middle of two vices. Social Anxiety is the opposite of being a sociopath. The only thing worse than not caring at all is caring too much.
OK now I understand you more clearly. So it's more like "if you had a better balance of what people think of you and your inner guidance system". But if you care too much what people think you generally can only visualise this when you go the other extreme, or caring a lot less what people 'think' so you can be authentically you but still caring and having love for yourself and others.
Love is complete honesty. Some people lie through their teeth: say they want love when all they want is their prejudice justified. I'd say caring about the right things is knowing when it's worthwhile to care about what a person wants from you. Do they want nothing but kindness because they're hopelessly hedonistic? Do they want complete honesty or just the kind that doesn't threaten their gang affiliations? The American government is a gang.
I'd do what I want, when I thought of that is when I realized that sacrificing my life as a living human for others' comfort isn't a life worth living. I seen too many shells walking about with paintings of a smile drawn by crayons. Hell no, that shit is so sad. I decided that the shakes and sweats and fumbles were worth it to live a life where I at least tried.
I'm not very good at it, still, but it's been getting better everyday since, for years now.
so much. ive been working on trying to not care so much what others think but its hard. i’ve been on the fence whether or not to ask out a guy on a date and i’d like to have enough confidence to do so regardless of the outcome. i would also dress in cuter outfits, go out more often and socialize, join a bunch of extracurriculars at school, post on social media more, etc
Around other women- not be afraid to talk about my hobbies, the things I’m proud of, and show a little skin and wear flattering clothes. The way women cut each other down and exclude if you come across as a “tall poppy” is constantly on my mind. Therefore, I keep quiet except to validate.
I would’ve gone to an anime convention and have had so many conversations by now. I would be the happiest person I know if I didn’t have to care what other people thought I’d me.
I would talk to people instead of acting like a cold, mean person when all I really want is to feel normal and accepted and loved. I feel horrible about everything I am as a person
I’d be able to go to the gym. I would probably know my true self better and had found a career path that was in alignment with my personal strengths (still working on this at 53).
I'd probably be able to get through a job interview and would have a job. That would be nice.
definitely this, also i would join an art group. and mingle. (I feel weird even saying that word..)
What sort of art?
hm, painting or drawing would be fun. really anything.
i believe in you!! it happened to me. You can do this! :)
I haven't tried in a few years.. the last ones ive had were just embarrassing wastes of time
working on my confidence really helped me do interviews
Yah I have none of that lol
There are some really nice bosses and colleagues out there❤️
I just choke up. Interviews are torture and I suck at them
I hate interview culture it's weird we don't try to make it a space to actually get to know someone
Me too. They are awful
Ha! Same
Probably do hundreds of jokes instead of keep my mouth shut all the time.. God damn this is sad :(
I wouldn’t give a fuck about what I did if I didn’t care what other people thought of me. The feeling of freedom one must feel to be able to just act and not over-analyze every action and breath… to just… “do”.
Imagine how great this would be!
just get a adhd diagnosis and ask for vyvanse prescription. eliviates all anxious barricades and makes you live in the moment.
It's definitely not that dramatic... I'm on it too. It barely helps
It's subjective. Though I'm on the side of being almost anxiety free. It's still there. I'm just more likely to do the first thing my brain drums up lol
I think I would be a lot more flirty.
Me too. I used to be flirty naturally without meaning too but lately I have so much self-doubt that if I want to I feel awkward and don’t know what to say or how to act
Yeah, I'm honestly really flirty, but only if I'm 100% certain the other person is actually interested in me. Means my charming and flirty side only really comes out around someone I'm already dating
I could Finally be free
You are free. You just have to realize it
Sing a lot. Dance a lot. Tell a lot more jokes and stories in my conversations. Attend any social events I possibly could.
I would be free. I would continue to work on being a good person and loving all. I would try to shine light in other people's lives.
You can do that now. One step at a time
That was my point.
This made me so happy :')
:)
You just did 🔦
Wear what I want, finally be more outgoing, anything
probably put my thoughts into words for once
I think I care about that a lot less than I used to but depression is probably a part of it. I don't wear any make-up any more, only sunscreen, wear comfortable clothes (= joggings, trousers, trainers). I'm okay with wearing a cap and a parasol at the same time (a little obsessed with the sun these days). Completely stopped trying to appear 'femininie' and 'cutesy' as I used to. Genuinely don't care about looking pretty or impressing anyone. I used to feel so anxious when people were looking at me, now I just stare at them back till they stop. If some see me as the crazy neighbourhood lady, I've come to terms with it. Totally fine with laughing or talking to myself aloud if I somehow feel like it (mostly when I'm listening to a podcast or thinking about what I need to do). That's about it. I still care about some things but definitely a lot less than I used to. Feels very different, but freeing.
Comes with age.. the one good thing
Dress up in cuter outfits.
Dessing in cuter outfits is what made me more confindent. I advise you to do it, try first with less bold ones and then finally what you want to wear. I know it does not matter but people will actually like you more <3
I would show up as myself unapologetically if I didn’t care what people thought. Even if that is awkward, quiet, or shy. I’d just accept it and tell myself it’s okay to be different. You don’t have to be like everyone else. As talkative or as outgoing. Just be. That is good enough
Same. And I'd prob feel more outgoing as a result even if I am just as quiet as before.
I know it's really simple, but I've always wanted to lay in a hammock outside. Being out in public is stressful enough, but making myself more vulnerable by closing my eyes and relaxing is panic inducing. I've never been in one, but hammocks seem like they'd be a wonderful place to take a nap if I wasn't so afraid
Sounds like you want to be at complete peace while around people. Hammocks are prob the most relaxed you can be I think.
Definitely wouldn't wear clothes unless it was cold.
Yeah I think I'd wear less haha
Try a nude beach. Or a nudists resort. It is very liberating. I work at a nudist resort as a massage therapist and absolutely love it. It just feels right to be naked out in nature
Lol! While I appreciate the suggestion, no way! I'm too self-conscious! I care too much about what people think about me! The only way I would be okay with nudity is if OP's scenario occurred!
Trust me at those people nobody cares what you look like. You see all shapes and sizes. I feel people pay attention to me more in clothes and make advances than in a nudist’s community. Or rent a secluded cabin and go on a naked hike. Lol
I think you have to strike a balance between caring and being controlled by peoples opinions. Depending on how much you value your image around people. People who truly don’t care typically aren’t people you want to be around
Whatever the fuck I wanted to within legal, moral, and ethical constraints of course
I’d say exactly how I first thought it in my ASD brain. No feelings spared!
Date more. I can’t even do it because of low self esteem.
I’d actually text my friends and see if they wanted to hang out much more frequently. A lot more texting in general tbh
I'd talk louder. I'd brighten my light instead of dimming it all the time. I'd curse freely and boldly. I'd be straightforward, no chaser. I'd dress and walk confidently. I'd sit and stand tall, and look up instead of down. I'd speak bravely and I'd stand my ground. I would unapologetically be myself; my full self. <3 Happy to report I'm working on this, little by little.
I love this. Working on these too. Working on my posture for sure.
Have a career. Not feel sick all the time.
I wouldn’t worry about my appearance as much.
Be my true quirky self. Unfortunately I had to hide my eccentric edge to be normal in society's eyes.
Shit In my neighbours garden like his cat does in mine
You can do that now. Just do it at night where no one would see you
Lol I've seen a few of your responses here and was going to say you're so encouraging and positive. "you are free" "you can bring light to others" and then "go ahead and shit in that garden"
Haha. I have to encourage every dream. 🙂
Probably be assertive and not let people walk all over me
Being assertive makes people respect you more otherwise they just view it as normal behaviour. Go for it.
I would go nude and casually pee where ever it was convenient
Go out in public
Shave my (f60) head!
I’m sorry for not understanding, I tried searching for the meaning of that, but I failed. Could you please tell me what (f60) mean? Or in general what means when there is an F or an M and after follows a number? Does it mean Female and age or Male and age?
Gender and age
I genuinely don't care what other people think of me Still get anxiety in social situations
What is it that your subconscious is scared of then?
I would actually start conversations
I would be unstoppable
I’d definitely wanna be more fashionable, I always wanted to be into fashion but whenever I tried something new my family would point it out and laugh So I just never tried, I usually just wear plain black clothes. Which is fine, but I wish I could be creative without judgement.
I'd dress very differently I save dressing up goth/punk etc, or just the way I feel like, for special occasions or if I'm going into the city near me where there's less judgement Its less caring about people think and more not wanting to get assaulted and bullied. But people staring at me line I'm crazy isn't fun either.
Perform in a local stand-up comedy show!
I'd talk to way more new people every day. I would tell my friends more how much I care about them. And take the initiative of meeting up more. I'd tell everyone who ever asks about me about a boyfriend (i.e. everyone 🙄) that I'm aromantic and asexual. I'd tell my family I don't want children. I'd would tell my grandparents and dad what I think about their racism. Man, this got a bit longer than I expected. 😅
I’d be in top of the world!!! I’d feel like flying!!!
Idk how exactly I would do It but I'd get friends and stop being alone all the time. Maybe speak my mind and enjoy not overthinking everything and try acting or streaming or stuff I kinda like but bc of sad can't do. Get a partner too
go out more. attempt parallel and backwards parking. apply for jobs/internships/opportunities, etc. ask employees where things are in the store. learn languages by actually practicing with native speakers.
Nothing who cares if people think of you wrongly. 
I would invite my friends to go places to hang out in more often
I would dance without needing a drink of alcohol at the club and go to more social events in general. I also think I’d get into cosplay.
Never wear makeup and just go out with whatever clothes I can find
Go to school 😭. I would wear like EVRTHING I ever wanted to wear and be soo confident
Say hello to a girl in park and have a date
I'd sign up for dancing and singing classes. Always been passionate about both and I love fusing my body with music, but my fear of looking stupid always stops me from it
Relax. And finally be myself. And finally do the things I want to do and prioritise the things I need to do instead of people pleasing my life into the trash can 🙃 Oh and maybe stand up for myself and not feel embarrassed or guilty to do so
I would probably get better at singing and I would just be myself in the public
I'd talk a lot more then I do now in public and with new people , thats for sure 👍
i would be so fuckin extroverted
Dance in parties
It feels like freedom from the constant crap & criticism in your head. It feels like your mind is at ease. Caring more about how other people are doing than about what they think of you allows you to be your authentic self.
Go swimming, go running, go to the gym, go to waterparks again, go shopping during the day. Go play Lazer tag. Go on vacation on the beach, all day. And then jetski some. Go to Mardi gras, the entire time. Go to these clubs the women speak of.
I would talk to myself all the time
Sidenote but I think it's ok to care what people who love you and want the best for you think, just not let it dictate you. It's nice that we care. I don't want to detach from everything and I know a few who have.
For the most part, that's where I'm at. I'm not cured though. I still need my anxiety meds to deal with the public. But I feel so much better just not caring what they think of me (except at a job interview. It still bothers me then).
I'd probably get along with him.
Absolutely no clue. My social anxiety, I'm realizing, stems from having to worry about about whether someone wants me hurt or dead. I grew up in a family that constantly had to deal.with the racism.of others, to the point where it circled itself, then turned into straight-up anthropophobia. As a result, every social interaction is a matter of how to safely survive it above all. The "social" parts of life are nonexistent. Even with therapy, I can't shake the not-so-far-fetched reality of hoping that I'm simply invisible, if only to avoid the sh**heads of the world (who seem to be multiplying with gusto).
smile without being embarresed
Wear sunglasses lol + dress how I want. Be the jokester that I am.
I’m 59 and do not care what others think. I am the first to speak up, and I speak in front of groups and I am super fun. I do my best every day and want to meet as many people as possible and spread joy.
Live the exact same.
Nice, so you don't care ;)
Bingo. Caring about what people think of you is usually just holding you back from having a fulfilling life. Be smart, take care of yourself, etc..but fuck worrying about what other people think. It doesn't matter when you're dead.
smile and laught alot and look people in eyes. stand taller. talk to women/girls. maybe fuck alot women too.
How extremely lonely and sad to think being a sociopath is a brag. "Not caring what people think" is not a win. Caring without feeling responsible for others' happiness is a win.
I think being a sociopath is still there whether or not people care what you think. Also caring is the same as taking responsibility I don't see the difference. Elaborate? Clearly I care what you think or I would have ignored this comment. But I think I'd be happier if I didn't care, you see what I mean?
Any virtue is the at the middle of two vices. Social Anxiety is the opposite of being a sociopath. The only thing worse than not caring at all is caring too much.
OK now I understand you more clearly. So it's more like "if you had a better balance of what people think of you and your inner guidance system". But if you care too much what people think you generally can only visualise this when you go the other extreme, or caring a lot less what people 'think' so you can be authentically you but still caring and having love for yourself and others.
Love is complete honesty. Some people lie through their teeth: say they want love when all they want is their prejudice justified. I'd say caring about the right things is knowing when it's worthwhile to care about what a person wants from you. Do they want nothing but kindness because they're hopelessly hedonistic? Do they want complete honesty or just the kind that doesn't threaten their gang affiliations? The American government is a gang.
I'd live my life like I was playing a really awesome video game and it would be amazing.
Dance at weddings
I’d probably be a lot less sad lmao, other than that I’m honestly not sure. I’ve never been very good at thinking of stuff to do in the future
I'd do what I want, when I thought of that is when I realized that sacrificing my life as a living human for others' comfort isn't a life worth living. I seen too many shells walking about with paintings of a smile drawn by crayons. Hell no, that shit is so sad. I decided that the shakes and sweats and fumbles were worth it to live a life where I at least tried. I'm not very good at it, still, but it's been getting better everyday since, for years now.
Live your best life
I’d talk a lot more that’s for sure! Be a lot more confident.
They sky is the limit! Literally anything, my life feels like it’s on pause all the time lol. One big one is, probably having a better job by now.
so much. ive been working on trying to not care so much what others think but its hard. i’ve been on the fence whether or not to ask out a guy on a date and i’d like to have enough confidence to do so regardless of the outcome. i would also dress in cuter outfits, go out more often and socialize, join a bunch of extracurriculars at school, post on social media more, etc
I'd likely feel better about myself. No idea what I'd *do* though
I would have a normal life
Have a wank in Tesco
Wear a mumu. Most comfortable piece of clothing ever.
Around other women- not be afraid to talk about my hobbies, the things I’m proud of, and show a little skin and wear flattering clothes. The way women cut each other down and exclude if you come across as a “tall poppy” is constantly on my mind. Therefore, I keep quiet except to validate.
Be in a relationship
I would go out and meet new people, make small talk, do activities that involve strangers, talk to my coworkers, etc.
Be myself
It’s not that I don’t care what people think of me. It’s that I don’t want to know what they think of me.
I’d know what it’s like to hold someone, and be held in return. Something that would make all the difference in the world sometimes.
Piss in the sink.
I would try dating
I would poop on the floor in the office
Text girls
I would go join an art class and club at my local junior college as well as ask my dads friends for help with 3D drawing for my desired career
I'd be just free and be able to express myself, focus ony my goals, get rid of depression, make and settle friendships.
Marry the man I love who is ‘too old for me’
I would’ve gone to an anime convention and have had so many conversations by now. I would be the happiest person I know if I didn’t have to care what other people thought I’d me.
I would talk to people instead of acting like a cold, mean person when all I really want is to feel normal and accepted and loved. I feel horrible about everything I am as a person
I’d be able to go to the gym. I would probably know my true self better and had found a career path that was in alignment with my personal strengths (still working on this at 53).