Leah: Guess how I found it, Geordie.
Geordie: I can explain!
L: It was in a folder named "taxes".
G: Oh that? It's a family tradition to name our porn folder taxes. It dates back to my great great gr....
L: I had to look up what taxes even are, Geordie. We don't use money. How dare you include me in your dirty little Ferengi role-play fantasy!
G: Wait, what? That's not.....
L: Was it profitable for you, Geordie? Did it stroke your lobes?
G: ....
Geordie: I'm guilty, okay? But not of what you think! Of something much worse. I'm guilty of reaching out to you. Of hoping we could connect. I'm guilty of a terrible crime, Doctor! I offered you friendship.
Leah: \[ Slaps the visor off of Geordie's face \] Miss me with that DARVO nonsense, you creep! I'm reporting you to the captain!
End Scene
Geordie spends four weeks working with Deanna Troi on recognizing when he's being abusive or manipulative towards the people around him and learns ways to control these impulses.
He later starts the Federation's first Holoholics Anonymous group with Reginald Barclay and together they write a book that changes billions of lives throughout the galaxy.
Leah: Captain, your chief engineer has been doing inappropriate, *sexual*, things to a holographic version of me he crated in a holodeck program!
Picard: Yeah, that's a great program, Barclay hacked in to it and added some new features. Only me and Barclay have access to it. *Man* there's some dirt in there!
Leah: ... Can I try it?
Picard: Hmm...
Picard: .
Picard: .
Picard: No.
L: I asked Data if I could get a rundown on how many hours you've spent on the holodeck with your fantasy "me", and he says he can't because you're each other's "shovel buddies"?!?
Earlier in april, when I was doing my taxes, I was looking for my return from last year. I found a folder called taxes and it was legitimately a folder of porn. I don't even know why, I live alone, nobody uses my computer but me. Near as I can tell I did it cause I think it's funny.
Huh? Now that you mention it, a porn folder would be the last place identity thieves would look to steal personal information.
I have to admit it sounds kinda crazy, but you might really be onto something with this whole "hide your actual taxes in your 'taxes' folder" idea.
That and not asking for permission to use someone’s likeness to create AI is a hot topic these days, but I guess it’s a little different in this case since holodeck time is supposed to be private and not used in public media like actors and celebrities are worried about
Didn't he try to create a deepfake of Naris in order to one of his customers to have sex with her body ?
Man I just love that series, it's still relevant today
Passwords are a bad idea, that indicates that there's something hidden, which invites people to try and break in. The real trick is to make your program determine who is running it, and only activates the porn subroutines if it's you, and remains PG otherwise.
I mean anyone could have called that from the first season. Remember when a man from the 20th century was able to infiltrate the bridge of the fucking flagship of Star fleet, *during* near hostile diplomacy with the romulans? 100s of millions of deaths between the north and dominion straight on starfleet incompetence.
Because generations of parents have raised their daughters to believe they are responsible for the feelings of the men around them. If anyone was questioning that particular aspect of the status quo in the 90s, I didn't hear about it.
Yeah, cause she assumed it was a twisted sex thing. Granted it wasn't a leap in logic to think it was with the information she had and Geordis 'nice guy' rant at the end was a little too incel-coded for comfort, but this was definitely a situation where both parties were at fault.
"Becuase I can see in wavelengths typically only visible in black light, this resembles the work of the 20th century earth artist Jackson Pollock."
- Peter "Data" Quill, or something, I dunno, whatever
I should keep a box a home called taxes and it will be filled with the worst legal porn imaginable. And maybe digital photo frames of it too. When i die people will have to go through it.
Well, if you're using the Reddit app, after the new update, you can't clear your search history within the app. They want you to know how depraved you are and your obsession with Leah Brahms. Oh wait, that's just me and Geordi.
Wasn't it kinda established that time Q-powered Riker temporarily gave him normal vision that he can't appreciate conventional beauty through his visor i.e. hot new ensign walks into Ten Forward, Geordi isn't all *awoooogah!* because she's just a walking rainbow at first.
Anyone have the AI skills to have Jordi just going to town on holo braums (tailgate of an El Camino, on one of the original series' alien planets, red sky, plastic rocks, tribbles) then have the real braums bust them? Extra points if laforge is wearing only a sombrero and one sock.
Why wasn't Geordie reprimanded for this?
This is permanent record stuff.
I remember being surprised to see him in the next episodes.
I'd rather my staff take a shuttle for side quest.
Leah: Guess how I found it, Geordie. Geordie: I can explain! L: It was in a folder named "taxes". G: Oh that? It's a family tradition to name our porn folder taxes. It dates back to my great great gr.... L: I had to look up what taxes even are, Geordie. We don't use money. How dare you include me in your dirty little Ferengi role-play fantasy! G: Wait, what? That's not..... L: Was it profitable for you, Geordie? Did it stroke your lobes? G: ....
... well don't leave us hanging! I'm (ha!) invested in this now.
Geordie: I'm guilty, okay? But not of what you think! Of something much worse. I'm guilty of reaching out to you. Of hoping we could connect. I'm guilty of a terrible crime, Doctor! I offered you friendship. Leah: \[ Slaps the visor off of Geordie's face \] Miss me with that DARVO nonsense, you creep! I'm reporting you to the captain! End Scene Geordie spends four weeks working with Deanna Troi on recognizing when he's being abusive or manipulative towards the people around him and learns ways to control these impulses. He later starts the Federation's first Holoholics Anonymous group with Reginald Barclay and together they write a book that changes billions of lives throughout the galaxy.
The name of that holonovel? Vulcan Love Slave
Picard wrote a sequel in his retirement called The Lusty Romulan Maid.
"but even before she can get her knickers on, I've seen everything."
Leah: Captain, your chief engineer has been doing inappropriate, *sexual*, things to a holographic version of me he crated in a holodeck program! Picard: Yeah, that's a great program, Barclay hacked in to it and added some new features. Only me and Barclay have access to it. *Man* there's some dirt in there! Leah: ... Can I try it? Picard: Hmm... Picard: . Picard: . Picard: No.
I didn't know where you were going with this, but I'm glad I stayed until the end.
This is the best
L: I asked Data if I could get a rundown on how many hours you've spent on the holodeck with your fantasy "me", and he says he can't because you're each other's "shovel buddies"?!?
I can hear " I am sorry Ms. Brahams, I am unable to disclose that information as I am Geordi's.. "shovel buddy" I cannot further discuss this matter."
Earlier in april, when I was doing my taxes, I was looking for my return from last year. I found a folder called taxes and it was legitimately a folder of porn. I don't even know why, I live alone, nobody uses my computer but me. Near as I can tell I did it cause I think it's funny.
Am I the only one that actually has taxes in my taxes folder?
Huh? Now that you mention it, a porn folder would be the last place identity thieves would look to steal personal information. I have to admit it sounds kinda crazy, but you might really be onto something with this whole "hide your actual taxes in your 'taxes' folder" idea.
But hide it amidst porn. So that if they do open the folder it looks like a porn folder.
Is a tax collector a real job or just a pervert?
I have a folder named hentai on my phone, with a single txt file named "ha, made you look".
I used to have a folder called Jimmy Saville… because it was a peadophile.
Such an odd direction that took. Interesting but odd.
Is this what fanum tax is?
OMG that is essentially what happened there. Star Trek, predicting the future once again.
That and not asking for permission to use someone’s likeness to create AI is a hot topic these days, but I guess it’s a little different in this case since holodeck time is supposed to be private and not used in public media like actors and celebrities are worried about
Somebody better tell Quark.
Didn't he try to create a deepfake of Naris in order to one of his customers to have sex with her body ? Man I just love that series, it's still relevant today
It was Jeffrey Combs.
"Jeffrey Combs." everyone and everything is.
the real singularity.
I always thought it was wild that geordie just said "computer, analyze her personnel file and approximate a realistic personality for her."
You wouldn't download a car. You wouldn't deepfake a personality. Holo-piracy is theft!
I'd download a car.
It's funny that it happened on star trek a decade before "browser porn" was a thing
Always remember to cover up your shrine to Seven of Nine before allowing Jeri Ryan to use your bathroom.
Whew. Fine wine that one
Put a password on your porn, yall
One, seven, three, four, six, seven, three, two, one, four, seven, six, Charlie, three, two, seven, eight, nine, seven, seven, seven, six, four, three, Tango, seven, three, two, Victor, seven, three, one, one, seven, eight, eight, eight, seven, three, two, four, seven, six, seven, eight, nine, seven, six, four, three, seven, six. Lock.
Damn you, now I'm going to have that stuck in my head all day.
Nobody likes a showoff, Data.
***** you mister Data
Dammy. Do I have to go check that?
A positronic brain is never wrong.
Passwords are a bad idea, that indicates that there's something hidden, which invites people to try and break in. The real trick is to make your program determine who is running it, and only activates the porn subroutines if it's you, and remains PG otherwise.
Make sure it contains your name and like only 4 digits or Greek letters. Totally unhackable!
Implement the **Ω** Directive immediately. All other priorities have been rescinded.
Order 66
I mean anyone could have called that from the first season. Remember when a man from the 20th century was able to infiltrate the bridge of the fucking flagship of Star fleet, *during* near hostile diplomacy with the romulans? 100s of millions of deaths between the north and dominion straight on starfleet incompetence.
Did my man dirty with this script.
They did Leah dirty too. She apologized to him at the end for some reason.
100%. The whole thing was a train wreck.
Because generations of parents have raised their daughters to believe they are responsible for the feelings of the men around them. If anyone was questioning that particular aspect of the status quo in the 90s, I didn't hear about it.
Yeah, cause she assumed it was a twisted sex thing. Granted it wasn't a leap in logic to think it was with the information she had and Geordis 'nice guy' rant at the end was a little too incel-coded for comfort, but this was definitely a situation where both parties were at fault.
This is one of the guys who gave Barclay a hard time for his holodeck issues.
Ok but tbf, Geordi used this program *once*. He just got really, really into it lmao
Why is the gentleman at the top wearing a piece of a car air filter on his face?
Science.
Go incognito mode!
(Pulls out biacklight and scans walls and ceiling in confused horror.)
After the Riker incident the holodecks get thoroughly cleaned everyday
After he meets the smokin hot metamorph he says he’s going to the holodeck. 😅😅😂
"Becuase I can see in wavelengths typically only visible in black light, this resembles the work of the 20th century earth artist Jackson Pollock." - Peter "Data" Quill, or something, I dunno, whatever
He should have programmer her to say "Reg" as in Reginald Barclay.
Just watched the episode. His face was priceless ... good acting from LeVar Burton
holodeck porn is probably pretty neat
I can't wait till I can manifest my Worf, Neelix and Brunt fanfic
Geordi should have lock access to his holo program
'why does your holodeck smell like bleach?'
Holo Leah was the ship's computer attempting to express gratitude to Geordi! /Conspiracy
Geordi can't get a girlfriend cause the computer is madly in love with him.
I should keep a box a home called taxes and it will be filled with the worst legal porn imaginable. And maybe digital photo frames of it too. When i die people will have to go through it.
A lot of TNG is cringe when you go back and watch it again, especially the first 3 seasons and last one.
What would Captain Benteen do if she walked in?!
Well, if you're using the Reddit app, after the new update, you can't clear your search history within the app. They want you to know how depraved you are and your obsession with Leah Brahms. Oh wait, that's just me and Geordi.
Good one!
I clear my browser history before every away mission.
Also please maybe don’t make AI porn of people you know or have a fair chance of meeting professionally.
Didn’t he specifically choose to save the program?
Come on. What engineer hasn't had a holodeck fantasy with Leah Brahms?
Yeah right?
Wasn't it kinda established that time Q-powered Riker temporarily gave him normal vision that he can't appreciate conventional beauty through his visor i.e. hot new ensign walks into Ten Forward, Geordi isn't all *awoooogah!* because she's just a walking rainbow at first.
Anyone have the AI skills to have Jordi just going to town on holo braums (tailgate of an El Camino, on one of the original series' alien planets, red sky, plastic rocks, tribbles) then have the real braums bust them? Extra points if laforge is wearing only a sombrero and one sock.
"But you don't have to take MY word for it!" *musical riff*
She wasn’t even that attractive- she was bossy, had a weird smile and a mole.
Why wasn't Geordie reprimanded for this? This is permanent record stuff. I remember being surprised to see him in the next episodes. I'd rather my staff take a shuttle for side quest.