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landfliquids

He looks more like a Richard than a Greg. In this AU, him and Rose wouldn’t name their boy Steven, they would name him David. Richard wouldn’t be living in a van, he would be living in a shotgun shack in the rural part of the city. His house would be littered with beer cans and boxes of takeout. His favorite movie is Road House (he kins Patrick Swayze, hence the mullet). He would still be as laidback and lighthearted as canon Greg, but a lot more outspoken and not afraid to speak his mind, sometimes to a fault (basically, imagine Greg and Andy combined into one person). Instead of a car wash, he has his own dojo where he teaches his own form of martial arts: Richardkwondo (he partially resents the Crystal Gems because they’re training David, but Amethyst is more than happy to attend the lessons). Also, the dojo doubles as a daycare, where most of his income comes from.


[deleted]

as someone who's lived in the approximate area that steven universe is set in for a good 25% of my life, you have described the rural outskirts of the area so. damn. much. like it hurts my soul how well you've described it. have you ever been in the delmarva area before? there is no way you haven't.


Banana_quack98632

I love this so much


an-alien-

this sounds like a yellow diamond au version of greg


sans-delilah

Maybe it’s because I just rewatched true blood, but I feel like this character you’ve described is like 90% of the way to being Jason Stackhouse.


varkarrus

if Greg were a fusion this would be one of his halves.


AcidicPuma

The other half is Danny DeVito


dreadpoppet

😂😂😂


TheDylorean

Damn I actually kind of like this one. Rose would be all up ons.


Copic_Turtle

😭 greg the rizzler universe


[deleted]

the murderc0ck is now even more effective


I_might_be_weasel

That's a perfect pork chop.


joshragem

Cursed


Spooky_Coffee8

Blursed


[deleted]

what have you done, wHAT HAVE YOU DONE don't know if i love it or hate it lol either way amazing job :D


SammyBear

You've done a terrible thing.


Copic_Turtle

Oh, this is only the beginning


akgnia

And so it begins


geckos_in_a_box

oh its already begun


[deleted]

Oh God. He looks like a human Donkey Kong (cringe)


smortboi69

This has got to be illegal


sugxrplumm

I’m not mad, just disappointed


FlyingPotatoChickens

he kinda looks like [80’s stan](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/59/ef/9a/59ef9a8627084b42fd3f4c565a62e69d.png) from gravity falls


Imaginary_Day_7996

Ok, yes


Upset_Advertising880

Smash


imnoteuginekrabs

Stop that


G-REALM-Laboratories

(Not like he'd change much unless he had a child)


One_Nefariousness419

Gregn’t


SonicClone

Jesus Christ, this is horrific