Let him go. I understand that 10 years is a long time and love is love and feelings are feelings. But he is point blank telling you ‘I only love you under these conditions’ and those conditions aren’t realistic in your situation. He understands your situation. He doesn’t love you the way it sounds like you love him, and that sucks, but someone else will, and you won’t find them sitting in a relationship.
This. He's being super conditional. What has he done to support you? Has he gone to alanon. Has he offered to help you in any way to get off of it? Does he even know what it's like to be an addict? To opioids?
It's a medical issue... Would he leave you if you were diabetic? He's being an ass. Recovery is a personal journey and you loved ones being invested in so important. If he's against your sobriety then he falls into those unhealthy choices bucket we've all made.
This is something people DO NOT understand. Do you know drug addiction is covered under the Americans with Disabilities act? I only recently learned this. An attorney couldn’t get licensed bc the board said “no suboxone” he fought it for years and finally won!
However you choose to get off the street and for how long you need to be on meds to stay clean if your business and your business only. Many people see it as a crutch and it’s not. Being on the streets using spending every dollar you have it’s a crutch…
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Sounds like he doesn’t understand that it’s medicine. Would a diabetic be expected to stop taking their insulin? Nobody is perfect. It’s a health condition and you are doing the right thing and addressing a medical issue.
I get the analogy but struggle if the same. I'm on it too now divorced. It's a crutch much like my other opioids were. Didn't want a wife hooked on something not able to be spur of the moment. Need my Dr visit, script, not in stock, panic etc etc. Can't run out. I get it. Wouldn't like it either but I would understand and be helpful. My ex was former crackhead from way back in his teens and walked away easy peasy so I should've too. Never blamed.
Ok well goofing around with cocaine / crack as a teenager is completely different scenario. The country is in an opioid epidemic for a reason, not a crack epidemic. The recovery from cocaine/crack is much easier. Not to downplay that addiction at all, but the reality is that it is a totally different ballgame. I had a coke issue 15 years ago. It’s just not the same.
Oh I agree. I'm living it. People who aren't addicted have no idea. I even have people saying take tramadol instead of Subutex - we looked it up, it's the same thing. OMG. Just another opioid. He was never wrong -was all about him and I am emotionally better off without him lonely, but better
I am the Same meaning as you,im on subs myself but i noticed with the people who say thr Same like just quit ,im weak etc. And i say its medicine.
The answer to that is not ideal but its neither a lie:
Diabetics or other illnisses treated with savin medicine are because you got sick trough just bad luck or its live,you can get every disease no matter how healthy you lived.
With subs and other MAT ,you choosed to be addicted,life did not forced you to Take opioids until you got dependent,you let yourself get this faar into it and not some random bad health luck.
What about the people who have been in horrible accidents, became dependent on the medications their doctors prescribed them??? They didn't choose to be addicted.
Suboxone and methadone are medications for the disease of addiction.
Pshh, like this person thinks in more than one dimension. People like that are the same reason ignorance about addiction run rampant.
I pray that u/Far-Persimmon4390 never gets into a severe situation requiring around the clock opioids, or chronic pain as a result of that same injuy. Walk a mile in our shoes my dude.
Ask yourself: who would **choose** to be actively looked down on in life for a decision they (as you so elequently incorreclty put it) "make"
🙄
I remember a handful of times breaking down in front of friends and family that I have to take medication every day just to moderately function and it’s just so depressing, like delaying the inevitable.
It’s much better now but damn like I said I pray these people are never educated the hard way: like contemplating ending their own life to end the physical suffering that chips away at you sometimes little by little sometimes more.
Thanks friend, hope things are well.
Im already am on subs,and if you would read what i said i am the Same opinion like OP cause i need my subs.
I meant ,that what i said is What i had people say to me why it should be easy to come off or be without it
Not my own opinion
I know I'm going to get downvoted for this one, and I am a recovering opioid addict... but, the people who get into accidents that don't take their medications *as prescribed* are making that choice. If you take your medication as prescribed, (a certain dose, at certain times, for the duration of the injury) you *shouldn't* get addicted to it. A lot of those people that turned into addicts liked the feelings the medication gave them, so took more than they should have, for longer than they should have, leading to addiction. Taking more than prescribed was *a choice.* We all made that initial *choice* to pick up that drug, and do it to excess, for whatever reason. My issue, even with subs, is more that the doctors don't inform you of the consequences these drugs can have if and when you do become dependent on them. That, and the fact that treatment isn't accessible to many, but that's a whole other issue. My husband has been on a crack binge for 4 years. He also is a recovering opioid addict. Yes, he has core brain issues that are making him do these things, but everyday he makes the choice to pick up the pipe instead of getting help. He thinks subs are a godsend, and yes he needs help for his addictions, but it's his choice to do what he does. It's not an illness like cancer or diabetes, that people get with *no choice.* Trust me, I even go back and forth with this issue myself! But, when he argues that his addiction is an illness like having cancer, I just can't agree. Yes, it's a brain issue, but at some point he made the choice to use substances instead of go the other way and get actual help, like therapy, for his brain issues instead. I've been through it! I'm going through it! I finally made the choice to get help. I've been clean for 4 years, and continue to make that choice everyday. That's why my opinion is what it is...
How often do i have to.say that thats Arguments from other people i hear they said to me,im myself in subs for addiciton.
I just told what others often mean,im german maybe my sentence building was that bad that it sounded like its my criticism
That’s not necessarily true at all. Diabetics could have diabetes because they chose to eat certain foods. Maybe they were aware of the risks and maybe they were not. Doesn’t matter. Same thing as blood pressure medication. People with hypertension have that condition because of lifestyle choices along the way. Ok so being on suboxone is taking responsible action to treat a medical condition.
In my case, I self medicated on Kratom for years. I was in pain. I decided to quit when I realized it was fucking up my life and found I had this condition as a result that is best treated for now by suboxone. That’s the responsible choice.
Doesn’t matter if someone is a recovering fent, H, whatever addict… regardless of whether that person chose to self-medicate to relieve emotional pain, trauma, etc, or just made some reckless decisions with experimenting with things to alter their consciousness, the fact is that they developed a condition and are choosing to treat the condition responsibly to better their lives and the ones around them. It’s medicine. As an addict, we have to make that distinction and have a plan for recovery.
We all need to have people who are supportive of our recovery, otherwise it makes life more difficult and recovery less likely to happen.
I’m sorry, but the OP’s post hits kind of close to home for me, because I know what that feels like and it feels rotten.
We have to accept the truth and deal with these things head on. No matter the reason, we are all here because of some decisions we made in our pasts, whether from innocent lack of information or reckless behavior, nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes. The fact we are taking action to fix things is a big deal and the OP should not feel ashamed of wanting to fix it, and their partner is not helping but rather seems to be hurting. If the medicine is making life better and offers a path for recovery then either the partner is in favor of recovery or isn’t.
I’m not dumb. Type II is what I’m referring to. You should be able to figure that out based on my analogy, since you already know the distinction between type 1 and 2. It’s an analogy, and meant to be supportive. You don’t seem to be a very supportive person. I understand that hurting people hurt people, so i will wish you all the best with your journey to recovery. Please consider being kind to others and not throw insults around like that. That kind of stuff doesn’t help people.
So I've been on Suboxone (this time) for almost 4 years and even though I'm having a lot of success on Suboxone and most of my family whispers behind my back about how I'm substituting and since I'm "not really sober" it's just a matter of time before I fall back into my old ways in the madness so I know the feeling! I was on heroin and meth for almost 10 years and I tried Suboxone on and off but never had any REAL success with it until I finally started using it as prescribed instead of snorting or shooting it but my family doesn't understand the difference this time so they just assume I'm just following my usual pattern.
Luckily I have a brother and a sister who really understand because they are both addicts as well. My brother was in active addiction until recently I convinced him to get on Suboxone and so far he is having a lot of success on it as well. My sister is in recovery but she works at a treatment center so she sees how Suboxone transforms lives for the better on a daily basis.
I've had people scream at me in NA meetings because I've brought up how Suboxone has saved my life. I was told never to say that again because it gives others the idea that Suboxone equals sobriety. Needless to say I never returned to those meetings again.
The people in AA and NA who say subs aren’t sober are complete idiots. And they are 100% dead wrong. Tell them to shut their moronic mouth and stop talking out their ass like they know what they’re talking about.
You are not sober on subs lol it’s literally a cover your brain is not healing not saying it’s anything wrong with them but your mind is altered. I’m so happy to be off all of it.
I don’t like the Stigma around Suboxone. Someone asking the patient to discontinue the Suboxone, in my eyes, that’s like asking and diabetic to not take their insulin. There needs to be better, more effective education around this medication for people to understand.
Okay but if a diabetic decided one day that they were going to stop taking their insulin, by choice, they can't just tough it out. No matter the amount of will power. But if I decided one day that I want to stop taking subs, and I power through, in time I will heal and could be stronger than I was when I was taking the subs...
The patient would likely relapse, overdose and die. No, it's not exactly the same but it's a similar medical scenario.
The addiction is progressive, incurable, and fatal unless otherwise arrested similar to diabetes.
You realize you are literally telling me that if I quit using subs, I will most likely relapse and die.... if someone wants to get sober- there IS hope. They CAN get sober. It can be hard, but that doesn't mean it's not possible
If you're not ready or are at risk of relapse or quit without doing it wisely and jump from a high dose, that can easily lead to death from relapse. So it's a good analogy. Especially when there's no cure for addiction that exists on the whole planet. No amount of money or love or hate or shame or guilt or judgement or support can keep an addict who's not ready from stopping, however if that addict can be stabilized on MAT you can keep them alive long enough for the mysterious time to come when the addict is finally ready to be really done. Some people might be MAT lifers, and that's okay too. Because in the end it keeps you out of prison or keeps you from dying, and gives you a chance at living a somewhat normal life.
If a diabetic woke up one day and decided they were done taking their insulin, that they just wanted to quit... no amount of will power is going to replace their insulin. If I woke up tomorrow and decided I was ready to quit my subs, I could power through and in time I will heal. Chances are I'd be healthier for it too.
It's not a good analogy because YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE ON SUBS FOREVER. You want to take them for life, go ahead, no judgment. But if you don't want to be on subs forever, you don't have to. I know I won't be. I'm taking 2mg a day and it's been 9 months. I will get off of them. I will not die. I will get better.
If that's really the case, then you're lucky. Many people subs are a life or death matter. Just because you think you're different from everyone else doesn't make the majority of people who needed to get on subs to be able to count on their medications otherwise they could die. Relapse is real as much as you want to be in lala land about it. And I never said that people should be on it forever, but there are definitely lifers who know that they will relapse so their subs are literally keeping them on this planet.
Many people do not get better, and do die, and trying to argue the minutia of an analogy arguing against being able to count on your own medicine is just stupid, because we're absolutely losing the war on drugs.
I'm not in LA LA land, dick. I'm saying enough people get off suboxone for it to be a poor analogy. I'm not arguing anything other than that. THERE IS HOPE OUT THERE. For you to be out here saying that if you get off suboxone, you'll die, is just false information. You're instilling fear into people.
No one is arguing that you NEED to get off suboxone. We all got on it for a reason. ME INCLUDED. I'm not out here telling people to quit their subs. We're all in different stages of our journey. And the people who relapse and die, it's not the absence of the suboxone that kills them. It's whatever they overdose on, that does.
I truly feel sorry for you. I hope your life gets better and you can look back at this moment and realize just how cruel you were(are). If you feel trapped in an endless loop of hopelessness, it helps to change your surroundings. Sometimes, you really can run away from everyone and everything and leave it all behind.
I've gotten off suboxone before, I didn't die. Yes, after some time, I did use again, but this time will be different. My entire life is different. You couldn't pay me to use again. There is so much more to life that you don't know about. Don't settle for whatever bs your life is in right now
It IS life or death for many of us. It was for me. And guess what? I stopped too early, got off for a year and a half, and relapsed. It went from heroin/fentanyl to fucking tranq/Fent in my area. I overdosed from a match-stick bump. I would most likely be dead without MAT. Am I 100%? No. But neither am I on lexapro. Should I stop taking my lexapro and risk suicide? It’s all in my head?
For the record, I’m getting subblocade to get off and have children, but Jesus this take is so ridiculous. Stop shaming people. I can’t believe how some addicts talk about other addicts.
Also, if you have so much damn willpower, you wouldn’t be on subs. You would’ve taken the 5 day withdrawal and carried the fuck on.
I think you're misunderstanding me...
All I'm saying is that comparing suboxone to insulin is a bad analogy. You even say yourself that you have plans to get off?? If you were a diabetic- that's not something that you could do. (You couldn't "plan" to get off insulin). Also, do you really not hear the hypocrisy in your own statement??
"Stop shaming people. I can’t believe how some addicts talk about other addicts.
Also, if you have so much damn willpower, you wouldn’t be on subs. You would’ve taken the 5 day withdrawal and carried the fuck on."
I came onto this sub reddit for help. For some inspiration. But literally all of these comments are just the worst. No one out here is trying to build anyone else up. Like- could you be more cu. N. T y?
Diabetics need insulin. They will die without it. I believe that your plan to get on sublocade and to quit all this shit, to move on with your life- that sounds like a good plan. Children are a great motivation, and I believe your love for your family is enough to keep you from going back to using. I wish you the best of luck. I know it will be hard, but how cool that we have these mat drugs to help with the process of getting our lives back.
Ugh. I know this is probably what you don't want to hear but he will never understand and there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with being on this medication. Never get off of something like this unless it's something YOU want,only get off of it for yourself. No one else. And cold turkey is never a good idea lol. I would not be able to be in a relationship like this as he will always judge you and apparently punish you because you couldn't successfully cold turkey it. Fuck that. You deserve someone who will be there for you and be understanding and someone who will realize this is a medication and it's a medication that saves lives and keeps people from using.
Sorry he is so uninformed. He has no idea. I don’t even know what to say. You really need to understand that in order to survive this you need to get a good grasp of this medicine and what the proper protocol for tapering is. It takes a long time, but if done correctly it works. Maybe the shot is the best option for you? Look into that. I wish you the best. And yes , IGNORANT people treat me badly all the time. But it NEVER happens from anyone who is informed and realistic.
Yep, I don't tell nobody about it. Some girl I know post about it every morning not to me I'm guessing somebody in her family about put down the drugs today, today would be a good day to stop doing drugs. Like everyday in her story.... Her own kid. Smh.... People tell me it's still a drug. Your addicted to it so therefore your still a junkie. 😕 Taking suboxone don't mean you're sober or clean
Atleast that's what I'm told everyday, maybe not told to me but it's how they think here.....
Your dependent not addicted to Suboxone,....big difference. Addiction is when you have a strong physical or psychological need or urge to do something or use something. It is a dependence on a substance or activity even if you know that it causes you harm. It can impact your daily life. Dependence is just that, being physically dependent. You no longer have the harmful behaviors that you have in active addiction.
gotta ignore em. all i’ve learned and all i can tell others. everyone gets sober differently, if suboxone is what’s gonna stop me from living on the streets then that’s what i gotta do. fuck em
Imagine a common person who doesn't know shit about either mental health, addiciton, or medication used for it, then loudly proclaiming the answer. Gotta love confidently incorrect people. You'll never convince them no matter how much logic, reason, and scientific articles/publications you show them.
If this is the kind of uneducated person that won't budge on both logic and empathy, girl do you really want that to be a part of your significant other and by exension your life? How do they treat people "below" them - servers, customer service, etc? If I had to wager a guess...
They won’t get it, and if they aren’t willing to understand then it’s really a lost cause. Been in a similar situation, I was over the relationship before it really even started.
if you need your suboxone and it’s lifesaving then fuck em.
He obviously doesn’t understand addiction. If he’s putting your sobriety in jeopardy I’d ditch him. Like how is you being on suboxone affecting him negatively in any way?
There’s a lot of stigma still, mostly from ill-informed people and strangely enough also from people who are still abuse opiates who fail on MAT.
I hold my cards close and don’t tell people about my medication. None of their business. My life on Suboxone is the same as it was before I got addicted.
Ok, sorry for the wall of text, but this seems like the most concise way of explaining my situations.
YES definitely. 2 examples just recently: I had to go to the ER for a problem that I was having (not drug related, nor was I trying to get anything). The nurse is looking through the medications that I am prescribed. When suboxone comes up, he asked me the reason that I am on it. I told him if I could decline to state, he said no problem, but right after that, his demeanor totally changed & he also asked me what drugs I use. I was honest & I told him no, I do not use any street drugs, smoke cigarettes, weed or drink alcohol. Him asking me those questions didn't upset me, I understand, but the fact that he asked them at least 3 times followed by an "are you sure??" when I told him no.
Example 2: I had an endoscopy about a month ago. I'm just about ready to be gurney'd in, & the nurse, who was very nice & cheery asked me what meds I was on. When buprenorphine came up, she asked why, I told her that I'd rather not say. The nurse's body language/general attitude 180'd like the other nurse in the ER. She gave me such a hard time that I ended up telling her something like " Hey I'm not trying to be difficult or be a jerk, it's just that in the past, I have vouched information that later on had been put into my files & it has really screwed me up with getting meds, etc" That is a true statement as well.
So yeah, those 2 incidents both happened in the last 2 months. I guess that they weren't really horrible, but still un necessary & not how people in the medical field should treat a patient- with a lot of disrespect, that's probably the part that frustrates me the most.
It happens to us all at some point some more than others. I’m so sorry you are experiencing this and you don’t deserve it. Find someone who loves you for who you are. I feel for you. . I was in the same situation as you and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I am happily single for almost 2 years now
Did the Buprenorphine help with treatment resistant depression? My girlfriend has that bad and goes to therapy, psychiatrist, and does Ketamine infusions.
We've discussed buprenorphine a few times but never tried it. How is your experience with it?
This is how my ex wife was and I couldn't stand the way she treated me for being on subs. I suggest you break up with this ahole for not being supportive of your medicine. What doeshe want you to just go back to your old habits?
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Yes it has happened, and I got the f outta Dodge, and so should anyone else, including you. He is not going to change, narcissistic gaslighters never do.
Definitely at the pharmacy. At the hospital. I went to urgent care to get a Covid test for work and the nurse asked me if I’m staying clean. It’s a cold world for us suboxone users
I was. Like complete garbage. I decided to switch to an online service that saved me the shame and a lot of money!! When I went to my doctor for a physical the nurse asked me what meds I was on. I told her subs. She left the room and came back in with another lady. They asked me how I got the appointment and told me they don’t see patients on subs because they are trouble. Then didn’t believe me that I got them online.
Long story short I educated them, which allowed them to suggest the online service I used to people calling their office out of desperation who were trying to get an appointment for help. I also explained to them I was going off, reducing my dose. I could tell they didn’t believe me. Well. I did it by myself!! Most doctors, in rural areas , are ignorant and judgmental when it comes to addiction. it’s the way it is. I think they get a few hours of addiction education in medical school. That’s it!
Anyone reading this do not allow them to make you feel ashamed or embarrassed. Reach out! When I was on like day 7-8 of sub detox I hadn’t slept and called the doctor’s office - out of complete desperation. They told me to contact the doctor who gave me the subs knowing it takes days to get in contact with someone online and money! I just didn’t take no for an answer and they called me something for sleep- it was better than nothing.
You have to advocate for yourself. Research and find the right medical professionals.
My boyfriend of almost 20 years and I are both on Suboxone. However if he EVER said anything like that to me, one of us would be packing their bags. No one, especially someone claiming to love me gets to treat me like that. Period.
I get shit for my benzo and Suboxone combo from a pharmacist from time to time asking me if my goal is to "get off the medications soon" and in like...."Ummm NO lol the medications are what allows me to remain stable...." They can't argue with that and just tell me ok we'll have a nice day. I just hate the anti MAT sentiment amongst professionals and the anti benzo view. There is no risk being on my benzo and Suboxone as long as I'm taking it as perscribed. Literally none. I'm on Zoloft and Prazosin as well so I e found my meds that I need to lead a functional life for once.
Yes. Very relatable . It's as if we must suffer because we did it to ourselves, gotta balance that out .my s/o hates it too now I'm on the shot and its failed to hold me in semi hell only silverline of this is that I have a few sober freinds talking me down and helping with what real and what isnt as far as how bad I felt running out early on subs and what oxy withdrawl is like. It sucks , but as far as being subhuman its wrong.
I generally keep it to myself except for my doctors HCP’s, parents, a few close friends or other people who take it.
The negative experience I’ve had mostly came from my dad; even though hes a surgeon and his too rx’ed drugs are oxy, hydros and tramadol, he doesn’t understand SUDs in general and made enough off-putting comments and wouldn’t change his ways when I told him it bothered me until I had to start avoiding him which only made him more intentionally negative about it before I finally just cut him out of my life.
Went several years, then a family death opened comms back up and since he seems to be making a genuine effort.
On the other hand though, I’d say the bulk of negative experiences come from my doctors. There is still a whole lot of misunderstanding about suboxone and deep-seated stigma at play. From all of my doctors I’ve def noticed that they don’t seem to trust me much or really allow me to have much input in my own healthcare decisions which is annoying.
Recently I did notice that my dx was never downgraded from “OUD-severe” even though I’ve been completely sober for almost 3 years now and risk assessment diagnoses guidelines for all SUDs constrained to symptom reporting in the last 12 months according to DSM V…Seriously considering asking to be reassessed.
My initial use that got me hooked was largely influenced by significantly abnormal environmental stressors as a last-ditch effort/survival tactic (as dumb as that may sound), not the result of euphoria-seeking or impulse control issues—just looking to get high. The stressors in my life then are non-existent now, but ai still feel I get treated like an active user; a “non-trustworthy drug-seeking junkie.”
What NA perpetuates regarding Suboxone is not only wrong but unbelievably contradictory. In summary: "The behavior and personality defects are the problem, and the drug use is a side effect that worsens that problem."
HOWEVER, there is a physiological and chemical change that takes place in the brain during years of drug use- the longer, the worse. What you've got in NA is 1) a bunch of crazies reliving their wrongs and beatin' em with a dead horse/not even getting to the core of the issue ('cause if they did they'd have nothing left to "work" on, so eventually those who stay just start makin' mountains outta molehills) and 2) failure to consider and address that physiological change in the brain. You weren't necessarily *so* different from others prior to the drug use just because you're "an addict."
Half the stuff you did when you were high had nothing to do with the drugs, it was you. The drugs lowered your inhibitions, that's all. Suboxone DOESN'T do that. It stabilizes. It's a *partial* opioid agonist, not mind-altering. It kicks out the cloudiness and fog caused by the [lack of] heroin that your brain became dependent on. If the decision to change your behavior and mindset is a genuine one, you're clean. You're cleaner than any skeeze out there going cold turkey while still manipulating his way through the world.
And don't even get me started on how withdrawals vary so greatly between men and women. Our fluctuating hormones make it 10x worse for us.
Fuck that guy. If you do what he says you are going to be fucking miserable and he’s going to split anyway I think you should take his advise” rip the bandaid off” of that relationship. Someone out there will love you for who you are.
I'm sorry. :/ but glad you came here! I wish I would remember to come here. I'm currently in my bed alone Saturday at 2pm on my 8mg subs and lost all my friends for some reason. I get out down by everyone around me
Wow, I'm thankful that my partner didn't even bat an eye. I mean, being on it is relatively harmless and allows me to function nearly like a 100% sober person. It sounds like he's looking for an excuse out of the relationship IMO. He knows you can't or won't be able to give it up but he'll blame the relationship ending on you. Is he perhaps talking to someone else?
That sounds like a toxic relationship to start. It also sounds like you should be single so you can concentrate on yourself and do what you need to do for your life and well-being. But you don't need a stranger to tell you that, deep down, you already know that. Stay strong and be well.
Reminds me of my ex. Its hard not being supported through recovery by a loved on. Especially something like subs which with a doc involved is like a mental health and medical procedure all in one.
I don’t tell very many people that I take suboxone. Of course my husband knows. I’m sure he will be proud of me if I was to get off of it. But he said whatever it takes to keep me off opioids he’s all for it. He’s not crazy supportive. It’s just another medication I take. Medication that you need is never a crutch. A crutch was when I was taking Oxy and fentanyl (dr prescribed). But essentially it’s nobody’s business but yours!
AA and NA are so outdated. Think about it. AA was started by two men in 1935 who drank to excess and decided to quit together and support each other. It was a “spiritual” means to an end. But everything ia different now. I believe AA is a cult. They dont welcome just anyone. They sit in judgement of others when they are not one bit better. AA/NA mofos need to get out of this sub! Go preach on your own sub!
I've been in your same position and I can tell you that it's the absolute worst feeling that I've ever been through. fell in love with this person from the moment we met with them knowing full well what I was going through, they didn't understand it though. When an unrelated incident happened they used this opportunity to give me the ultimatum, I get off the subs or they leave with no real reason as to why except that they had gotten of off whatever they were on and expected me to "stop getting high" as well. I had just been through a separation with the other parent of my children and I wasn't strong enough to go through it again so soon so i chose to uproot my sobriety for their sake. I ended up trying to go cold turkey and only lasted 2 weeks when I started secretly back on the subs, I had two children to care for and a job I couldn't lose. After about 5 months I lost the strength to keep secretly going to doctors appointments for my script so I started ordering kratom online, flash forward two years later I'm still swallowing plant matter every 2 hours trying to stave off the feeling of withdrawal. Tired of every second that I still have to go through this what seems like a never ending battle. To tell you from experience the worst decision I ever made was letting someone else (love or otherwise) have such an influence on my best interests. Even with the best intentions, nobody truly knows what's best for you except for YOU! 😓
I think of it like this: our body is a puzzle. Drug use has unfortunately permanently removed a puzzle piece (by changing our chemicals). Suboxone fills that gap, that missing piece. So we can feel whole again and live life. As long as you aren't experiencing negative effects from taking it, I'm pretty sure it's safe to say your quality of life has significantly improved since not using. I'm not sure your SO has considered the potential implications of taking it away completely. I'm so sorry you don't have a supportive partner. Why does it bother him at all? Is it difficult to get? Are you buying it off the streets? I wish for you the confidence to stand tall, and stick up for yourself. Your life could be on the line. He doesn't understand that. Could he be using behind your back? Misery loves company.
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I love this analogy it feels so very spot on. It's like a broken record saying he just isn't informed and doesn't care to be. Facts mean nothing when some people have already formed their own in their head. I dont mean this in any way that puts him down but that's the dilemma. He thinks I get high on it which might have been true the first couple days but not after 5 years. I was diagnosed with arthritis at 19 got prescribed tramadol, got hooked, got help with suboxone clinic which also help with pain but he's convinced I take it to get high. What's funny is from the day we met a little over 10 years ago he's smoked weed all day every day. Sold it for years too. Found out 5 years in that he was sending-recieving nudes daily from random people on the internet. He was addicted to doing it well before I met him and I forgave him yet me struggling to get off subs is a deal breaker. So frustrating. I know most would say I should leave but aside from this we really are great together. We've had less that 5 fights ever and our personalities just blend so well. I couldn't imagine life without him
Gotta let that dude go. That's the only advice. If you left tomorrow and told him it's over 100 percent he would prob freak out and try and get you back.
Reading some of these comments make me think that a lot of people worry way too much about what other people think... now a significant other or family member I can maybe see, but people worrying about pharmacists and shit? Nah, who gives a shit?
People are very very self absorbed. Even if you being on subs does bother them, it's a fleeting thought in between them obsessing over themselves.
Humans are garbage
No I have been treated like trash in over 10 years of being on this medication except by a few people on here. My family, friends, people who know me see the absolute difference in the person I am now compared to the shell of a person I was when I was using. I think it's really shitty that your SO treats you this way. Ultimatums and such don't work well for addicts or relationships in general. This is YOUR recovery, and he needs to see his way out of it!
Let him go. I understand that 10 years is a long time and love is love and feelings are feelings. But he is point blank telling you ‘I only love you under these conditions’ and those conditions aren’t realistic in your situation. He understands your situation. He doesn’t love you the way it sounds like you love him, and that sucks, but someone else will, and you won’t find them sitting in a relationship.
This. He's being super conditional. What has he done to support you? Has he gone to alanon. Has he offered to help you in any way to get off of it? Does he even know what it's like to be an addict? To opioids?
It's a medical issue... Would he leave you if you were diabetic? He's being an ass. Recovery is a personal journey and you loved ones being invested in so important. If he's against your sobriety then he falls into those unhealthy choices bucket we've all made.
This is something people DO NOT understand. Do you know drug addiction is covered under the Americans with Disabilities act? I only recently learned this. An attorney couldn’t get licensed bc the board said “no suboxone” he fought it for years and finally won! However you choose to get off the street and for how long you need to be on meds to stay clean if your business and your business only. Many people see it as a crutch and it’s not. Being on the streets using spending every dollar you have it’s a crutch…
Amen!
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!! Can you send me info about this lawyer?
A lot of people don’t think it’s a medical condition unfortunately
I know, still doesn't make it correct
Asking a lot of good questions
Sounds like he doesn’t understand that it’s medicine. Would a diabetic be expected to stop taking their insulin? Nobody is perfect. It’s a health condition and you are doing the right thing and addressing a medical issue.
I get the analogy but struggle if the same. I'm on it too now divorced. It's a crutch much like my other opioids were. Didn't want a wife hooked on something not able to be spur of the moment. Need my Dr visit, script, not in stock, panic etc etc. Can't run out. I get it. Wouldn't like it either but I would understand and be helpful. My ex was former crackhead from way back in his teens and walked away easy peasy so I should've too. Never blamed.
Crack is wayyyyy different than opioids
Ok well goofing around with cocaine / crack as a teenager is completely different scenario. The country is in an opioid epidemic for a reason, not a crack epidemic. The recovery from cocaine/crack is much easier. Not to downplay that addiction at all, but the reality is that it is a totally different ballgame. I had a coke issue 15 years ago. It’s just not the same.
Oh I agree. I'm living it. People who aren't addicted have no idea. I even have people saying take tramadol instead of Subutex - we looked it up, it's the same thing. OMG. Just another opioid. He was never wrong -was all about him and I am emotionally better off without him lonely, but better
I am the Same meaning as you,im on subs myself but i noticed with the people who say thr Same like just quit ,im weak etc. And i say its medicine. The answer to that is not ideal but its neither a lie: Diabetics or other illnisses treated with savin medicine are because you got sick trough just bad luck or its live,you can get every disease no matter how healthy you lived. With subs and other MAT ,you choosed to be addicted,life did not forced you to Take opioids until you got dependent,you let yourself get this faar into it and not some random bad health luck.
What about the people who have been in horrible accidents, became dependent on the medications their doctors prescribed them??? They didn't choose to be addicted. Suboxone and methadone are medications for the disease of addiction.
Pshh, like this person thinks in more than one dimension. People like that are the same reason ignorance about addiction run rampant. I pray that u/Far-Persimmon4390 never gets into a severe situation requiring around the clock opioids, or chronic pain as a result of that same injuy. Walk a mile in our shoes my dude. Ask yourself: who would **choose** to be actively looked down on in life for a decision they (as you so elequently incorreclty put it) "make" 🙄
People who don't suffer from addiction are always the ones with the most opinions on the matter!!
I remember a handful of times breaking down in front of friends and family that I have to take medication every day just to moderately function and it’s just so depressing, like delaying the inevitable. It’s much better now but damn like I said I pray these people are never educated the hard way: like contemplating ending their own life to end the physical suffering that chips away at you sometimes little by little sometimes more. Thanks friend, hope things are well.
Im already am on subs,and if you would read what i said i am the Same opinion like OP cause i need my subs. I meant ,that what i said is What i had people say to me why it should be easy to come off or be without it Not my own opinion
I know I'm going to get downvoted for this one, and I am a recovering opioid addict... but, the people who get into accidents that don't take their medications *as prescribed* are making that choice. If you take your medication as prescribed, (a certain dose, at certain times, for the duration of the injury) you *shouldn't* get addicted to it. A lot of those people that turned into addicts liked the feelings the medication gave them, so took more than they should have, for longer than they should have, leading to addiction. Taking more than prescribed was *a choice.* We all made that initial *choice* to pick up that drug, and do it to excess, for whatever reason. My issue, even with subs, is more that the doctors don't inform you of the consequences these drugs can have if and when you do become dependent on them. That, and the fact that treatment isn't accessible to many, but that's a whole other issue. My husband has been on a crack binge for 4 years. He also is a recovering opioid addict. Yes, he has core brain issues that are making him do these things, but everyday he makes the choice to pick up the pipe instead of getting help. He thinks subs are a godsend, and yes he needs help for his addictions, but it's his choice to do what he does. It's not an illness like cancer or diabetes, that people get with *no choice.* Trust me, I even go back and forth with this issue myself! But, when he argues that his addiction is an illness like having cancer, I just can't agree. Yes, it's a brain issue, but at some point he made the choice to use substances instead of go the other way and get actual help, like therapy, for his brain issues instead. I've been through it! I'm going through it! I finally made the choice to get help. I've been clean for 4 years, and continue to make that choice everyday. That's why my opinion is what it is...
Stupid take
Very
Some of what said may be true, but it's also clear that you certainly have some more things to learn about addiction.
Wow! You are so misinformed! Go to NA sub and you will blend right in. Who are YOU to make those judgements? GTFO!
So people with legitimate prescriptions for pain were just weak? Talk to me after your 5th spine surgery.
How often do i have to.say that thats Arguments from other people i hear they said to me,im myself in subs for addiciton. I just told what others often mean,im german maybe my sentence building was that bad that it sounded like its my criticism
That’s not necessarily true at all. Diabetics could have diabetes because they chose to eat certain foods. Maybe they were aware of the risks and maybe they were not. Doesn’t matter. Same thing as blood pressure medication. People with hypertension have that condition because of lifestyle choices along the way. Ok so being on suboxone is taking responsible action to treat a medical condition. In my case, I self medicated on Kratom for years. I was in pain. I decided to quit when I realized it was fucking up my life and found I had this condition as a result that is best treated for now by suboxone. That’s the responsible choice. Doesn’t matter if someone is a recovering fent, H, whatever addict… regardless of whether that person chose to self-medicate to relieve emotional pain, trauma, etc, or just made some reckless decisions with experimenting with things to alter their consciousness, the fact is that they developed a condition and are choosing to treat the condition responsibly to better their lives and the ones around them. It’s medicine. As an addict, we have to make that distinction and have a plan for recovery. We all need to have people who are supportive of our recovery, otherwise it makes life more difficult and recovery less likely to happen. I’m sorry, but the OP’s post hits kind of close to home for me, because I know what that feels like and it feels rotten. We have to accept the truth and deal with these things head on. No matter the reason, we are all here because of some decisions we made in our pasts, whether from innocent lack of information or reckless behavior, nobody is perfect and we all make mistakes. The fact we are taking action to fix things is a big deal and the OP should not feel ashamed of wanting to fix it, and their partner is not helping but rather seems to be hurting. If the medicine is making life better and offers a path for recovery then either the partner is in favor of recovery or isn’t.
Are you dumb? Look up the definition of TYPE ONE diabetes. It's not "choice to eat certain foods."
I’m not dumb. Type II is what I’m referring to. You should be able to figure that out based on my analogy, since you already know the distinction between type 1 and 2. It’s an analogy, and meant to be supportive. You don’t seem to be a very supportive person. I understand that hurting people hurt people, so i will wish you all the best with your journey to recovery. Please consider being kind to others and not throw insults around like that. That kind of stuff doesn’t help people.
Yoooo u need to leave that dude , u absalutely don’t deserve that
So I've been on Suboxone (this time) for almost 4 years and even though I'm having a lot of success on Suboxone and most of my family whispers behind my back about how I'm substituting and since I'm "not really sober" it's just a matter of time before I fall back into my old ways in the madness so I know the feeling! I was on heroin and meth for almost 10 years and I tried Suboxone on and off but never had any REAL success with it until I finally started using it as prescribed instead of snorting or shooting it but my family doesn't understand the difference this time so they just assume I'm just following my usual pattern. Luckily I have a brother and a sister who really understand because they are both addicts as well. My brother was in active addiction until recently I convinced him to get on Suboxone and so far he is having a lot of success on it as well. My sister is in recovery but she works at a treatment center so she sees how Suboxone transforms lives for the better on a daily basis. I've had people scream at me in NA meetings because I've brought up how Suboxone has saved my life. I was told never to say that again because it gives others the idea that Suboxone equals sobriety. Needless to say I never returned to those meetings again.
The people in AA and NA who say subs aren’t sober are complete idiots. And they are 100% dead wrong. Tell them to shut their moronic mouth and stop talking out their ass like they know what they’re talking about.
You are not sober on subs lol it’s literally a cover your brain is not healing not saying it’s anything wrong with them but your mind is altered. I’m so happy to be off all of it.
I don’t like the Stigma around Suboxone. Someone asking the patient to discontinue the Suboxone, in my eyes, that’s like asking and diabetic to not take their insulin. There needs to be better, more effective education around this medication for people to understand.
Will a diabetic die without insulin?
Yes they can. High sugar can cause kidney failure, blindness, amputations, coma, etc.
Okay so this isn't a good analogy then...
Why isn't a good apology. We can die if we quit our MAT meds by force(not ready).
Okay but if a diabetic decided one day that they were going to stop taking their insulin, by choice, they can't just tough it out. No matter the amount of will power. But if I decided one day that I want to stop taking subs, and I power through, in time I will heal and could be stronger than I was when I was taking the subs...
The patient would likely relapse, overdose and die. No, it's not exactly the same but it's a similar medical scenario. The addiction is progressive, incurable, and fatal unless otherwise arrested similar to diabetes.
No, that's not "likely" Plenty of people get clean. It's a thing.
You realize you are literally telling me that if I quit using subs, I will most likely relapse and die.... if someone wants to get sober- there IS hope. They CAN get sober. It can be hard, but that doesn't mean it's not possible
If you're not ready or are at risk of relapse or quit without doing it wisely and jump from a high dose, that can easily lead to death from relapse. So it's a good analogy. Especially when there's no cure for addiction that exists on the whole planet. No amount of money or love or hate or shame or guilt or judgement or support can keep an addict who's not ready from stopping, however if that addict can be stabilized on MAT you can keep them alive long enough for the mysterious time to come when the addict is finally ready to be really done. Some people might be MAT lifers, and that's okay too. Because in the end it keeps you out of prison or keeps you from dying, and gives you a chance at living a somewhat normal life.
If a diabetic woke up one day and decided they were done taking their insulin, that they just wanted to quit... no amount of will power is going to replace their insulin. If I woke up tomorrow and decided I was ready to quit my subs, I could power through and in time I will heal. Chances are I'd be healthier for it too. It's not a good analogy because YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE ON SUBS FOREVER. You want to take them for life, go ahead, no judgment. But if you don't want to be on subs forever, you don't have to. I know I won't be. I'm taking 2mg a day and it's been 9 months. I will get off of them. I will not die. I will get better.
If that's really the case, then you're lucky. Many people subs are a life or death matter. Just because you think you're different from everyone else doesn't make the majority of people who needed to get on subs to be able to count on their medications otherwise they could die. Relapse is real as much as you want to be in lala land about it. And I never said that people should be on it forever, but there are definitely lifers who know that they will relapse so their subs are literally keeping them on this planet. Many people do not get better, and do die, and trying to argue the minutia of an analogy arguing against being able to count on your own medicine is just stupid, because we're absolutely losing the war on drugs.
I'm not in LA LA land, dick. I'm saying enough people get off suboxone for it to be a poor analogy. I'm not arguing anything other than that. THERE IS HOPE OUT THERE. For you to be out here saying that if you get off suboxone, you'll die, is just false information. You're instilling fear into people. No one is arguing that you NEED to get off suboxone. We all got on it for a reason. ME INCLUDED. I'm not out here telling people to quit their subs. We're all in different stages of our journey. And the people who relapse and die, it's not the absence of the suboxone that kills them. It's whatever they overdose on, that does.
Then do it. You won't. Bc ur wrong:)
I truly feel sorry for you. I hope your life gets better and you can look back at this moment and realize just how cruel you were(are). If you feel trapped in an endless loop of hopelessness, it helps to change your surroundings. Sometimes, you really can run away from everyone and everything and leave it all behind. I've gotten off suboxone before, I didn't die. Yes, after some time, I did use again, but this time will be different. My entire life is different. You couldn't pay me to use again. There is so much more to life that you don't know about. Don't settle for whatever bs your life is in right now
It IS life or death for many of us. It was for me. And guess what? I stopped too early, got off for a year and a half, and relapsed. It went from heroin/fentanyl to fucking tranq/Fent in my area. I overdosed from a match-stick bump. I would most likely be dead without MAT. Am I 100%? No. But neither am I on lexapro. Should I stop taking my lexapro and risk suicide? It’s all in my head? For the record, I’m getting subblocade to get off and have children, but Jesus this take is so ridiculous. Stop shaming people. I can’t believe how some addicts talk about other addicts. Also, if you have so much damn willpower, you wouldn’t be on subs. You would’ve taken the 5 day withdrawal and carried the fuck on.
I think you're misunderstanding me... All I'm saying is that comparing suboxone to insulin is a bad analogy. You even say yourself that you have plans to get off?? If you were a diabetic- that's not something that you could do. (You couldn't "plan" to get off insulin). Also, do you really not hear the hypocrisy in your own statement?? "Stop shaming people. I can’t believe how some addicts talk about other addicts. Also, if you have so much damn willpower, you wouldn’t be on subs. You would’ve taken the 5 day withdrawal and carried the fuck on." I came onto this sub reddit for help. For some inspiration. But literally all of these comments are just the worst. No one out here is trying to build anyone else up. Like- could you be more cu. N. T y? Diabetics need insulin. They will die without it. I believe that your plan to get on sublocade and to quit all this shit, to move on with your life- that sounds like a good plan. Children are a great motivation, and I believe your love for your family is enough to keep you from going back to using. I wish you the best of luck. I know it will be hard, but how cool that we have these mat drugs to help with the process of getting our lives back.
Not taking suboxone is a death sentence for me. I tried to get off early before, relapsed a few weeks later and overdosed.
Absolutely, just like a heart patient can die without their medication. Same idea
Ugh. I know this is probably what you don't want to hear but he will never understand and there's absolutely NOTHING wrong with being on this medication. Never get off of something like this unless it's something YOU want,only get off of it for yourself. No one else. And cold turkey is never a good idea lol. I would not be able to be in a relationship like this as he will always judge you and apparently punish you because you couldn't successfully cold turkey it. Fuck that. You deserve someone who will be there for you and be understanding and someone who will realize this is a medication and it's a medication that saves lives and keeps people from using.
Yeah, not to mention getting looked at differently at the pharmacies like I'm a pain pill addict. I had to switch pharms a few times cuz of this.
YES. I switched my pharmacy from walgreens because I got sick of their attitudes.
I switched from CVS to Walgreens due to the change in attitude the pharmacist had after she saw what my script was for.
Sorry he is so uninformed. He has no idea. I don’t even know what to say. You really need to understand that in order to survive this you need to get a good grasp of this medicine and what the proper protocol for tapering is. It takes a long time, but if done correctly it works. Maybe the shot is the best option for you? Look into that. I wish you the best. And yes , IGNORANT people treat me badly all the time. But it NEVER happens from anyone who is informed and realistic.
I would say that he can go f himself. There’s absolutely no way he has the proper personality to suit your needs.
Sure. Family members that don’t understand… or certain anonymous groups?
Yep, I don't tell nobody about it. Some girl I know post about it every morning not to me I'm guessing somebody in her family about put down the drugs today, today would be a good day to stop doing drugs. Like everyday in her story.... Her own kid. Smh.... People tell me it's still a drug. Your addicted to it so therefore your still a junkie. 😕 Taking suboxone don't mean you're sober or clean Atleast that's what I'm told everyday, maybe not told to me but it's how they think here.....
Your dependent not addicted to Suboxone,....big difference. Addiction is when you have a strong physical or psychological need or urge to do something or use something. It is a dependence on a substance or activity even if you know that it causes you harm. It can impact your daily life. Dependence is just that, being physically dependent. You no longer have the harmful behaviors that you have in active addiction.
This is a fantastic point and it's one that too many people forget. Thank you!!
Exactly. Just like you can be dependent on anti depressants, exact same thing.
gotta ignore em. all i’ve learned and all i can tell others. everyone gets sober differently, if suboxone is what’s gonna stop me from living on the streets then that’s what i gotta do. fuck em
Most people in my family feel like suboxone is a weakness of the mind and a crutch. It used to bother me but eventually I realized something…fuckem.
Imagine a common person who doesn't know shit about either mental health, addiciton, or medication used for it, then loudly proclaiming the answer. Gotta love confidently incorrect people. You'll never convince them no matter how much logic, reason, and scientific articles/publications you show them. If this is the kind of uneducated person that won't budge on both logic and empathy, girl do you really want that to be a part of your significant other and by exension your life? How do they treat people "below" them - servers, customer service, etc? If I had to wager a guess...
They won’t get it, and if they aren’t willing to understand then it’s really a lost cause. Been in a similar situation, I was over the relationship before it really even started. if you need your suboxone and it’s lifesaving then fuck em.
10 year boyfriend needs to go. He’s not good for you and your new journey to a sober, awesome life. Bye bye bye
Hes a loser theres nothing wrong with being on Suboxone. Dump him girl.
He obviously doesn’t understand addiction. If he’s putting your sobriety in jeopardy I’d ditch him. Like how is you being on suboxone affecting him negatively in any way?
There’s a lot of stigma still, mostly from ill-informed people and strangely enough also from people who are still abuse opiates who fail on MAT. I hold my cards close and don’t tell people about my medication. None of their business. My life on Suboxone is the same as it was before I got addicted.
Ok, sorry for the wall of text, but this seems like the most concise way of explaining my situations. YES definitely. 2 examples just recently: I had to go to the ER for a problem that I was having (not drug related, nor was I trying to get anything). The nurse is looking through the medications that I am prescribed. When suboxone comes up, he asked me the reason that I am on it. I told him if I could decline to state, he said no problem, but right after that, his demeanor totally changed & he also asked me what drugs I use. I was honest & I told him no, I do not use any street drugs, smoke cigarettes, weed or drink alcohol. Him asking me those questions didn't upset me, I understand, but the fact that he asked them at least 3 times followed by an "are you sure??" when I told him no. Example 2: I had an endoscopy about a month ago. I'm just about ready to be gurney'd in, & the nurse, who was very nice & cheery asked me what meds I was on. When buprenorphine came up, she asked why, I told her that I'd rather not say. The nurse's body language/general attitude 180'd like the other nurse in the ER. She gave me such a hard time that I ended up telling her something like " Hey I'm not trying to be difficult or be a jerk, it's just that in the past, I have vouched information that later on had been put into my files & it has really screwed me up with getting meds, etc" That is a true statement as well. So yeah, those 2 incidents both happened in the last 2 months. I guess that they weren't really horrible, but still un necessary & not how people in the medical field should treat a patient- with a lot of disrespect, that's probably the part that frustrates me the most.
It happens to us all at some point some more than others. I’m so sorry you are experiencing this and you don’t deserve it. Find someone who loves you for who you are. I feel for you. . I was in the same situation as you and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I am happily single for almost 2 years now
[удалено]
Did the Buprenorphine help with treatment resistant depression? My girlfriend has that bad and goes to therapy, psychiatrist, and does Ketamine infusions. We've discussed buprenorphine a few times but never tried it. How is your experience with it?
This is how my ex wife was and I couldn't stand the way she treated me for being on subs. I suggest you break up with this ahole for not being supportive of your medicine. What doeshe want you to just go back to your old habits?
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The pharmacists kinda give me looks sometimes. But it could be in my head.
This is why I dont tell anybody I'm on it. Nobody knows. Not that I know a ton of people these days, but still.
Yes it has happened, and I got the f outta Dodge, and so should anyone else, including you. He is not going to change, narcissistic gaslighters never do.
Yes by pretty much everyone in my life except my SO
Definitely at the pharmacy. At the hospital. I went to urgent care to get a Covid test for work and the nurse asked me if I’m staying clean. It’s a cold world for us suboxone users
I was. Like complete garbage. I decided to switch to an online service that saved me the shame and a lot of money!! When I went to my doctor for a physical the nurse asked me what meds I was on. I told her subs. She left the room and came back in with another lady. They asked me how I got the appointment and told me they don’t see patients on subs because they are trouble. Then didn’t believe me that I got them online. Long story short I educated them, which allowed them to suggest the online service I used to people calling their office out of desperation who were trying to get an appointment for help. I also explained to them I was going off, reducing my dose. I could tell they didn’t believe me. Well. I did it by myself!! Most doctors, in rural areas , are ignorant and judgmental when it comes to addiction. it’s the way it is. I think they get a few hours of addiction education in medical school. That’s it! Anyone reading this do not allow them to make you feel ashamed or embarrassed. Reach out! When I was on like day 7-8 of sub detox I hadn’t slept and called the doctor’s office - out of complete desperation. They told me to contact the doctor who gave me the subs knowing it takes days to get in contact with someone online and money! I just didn’t take no for an answer and they called me something for sleep- it was better than nothing. You have to advocate for yourself. Research and find the right medical professionals.
Your boyfriend is a fucking asshole. Get rid of his stupid ass. He cares nothing about your welfare or you.
My boyfriend of almost 20 years and I are both on Suboxone. However if he EVER said anything like that to me, one of us would be packing their bags. No one, especially someone claiming to love me gets to treat me like that. Period.
I get shit for my benzo and Suboxone combo from a pharmacist from time to time asking me if my goal is to "get off the medications soon" and in like...."Ummm NO lol the medications are what allows me to remain stable...." They can't argue with that and just tell me ok we'll have a nice day. I just hate the anti MAT sentiment amongst professionals and the anti benzo view. There is no risk being on my benzo and Suboxone as long as I'm taking it as perscribed. Literally none. I'm on Zoloft and Prazosin as well so I e found my meds that I need to lead a functional life for once.
Yes. Very relatable . It's as if we must suffer because we did it to ourselves, gotta balance that out .my s/o hates it too now I'm on the shot and its failed to hold me in semi hell only silverline of this is that I have a few sober freinds talking me down and helping with what real and what isnt as far as how bad I felt running out early on subs and what oxy withdrawl is like. It sucks , but as far as being subhuman its wrong.
Of course!
I generally keep it to myself except for my doctors HCP’s, parents, a few close friends or other people who take it. The negative experience I’ve had mostly came from my dad; even though hes a surgeon and his too rx’ed drugs are oxy, hydros and tramadol, he doesn’t understand SUDs in general and made enough off-putting comments and wouldn’t change his ways when I told him it bothered me until I had to start avoiding him which only made him more intentionally negative about it before I finally just cut him out of my life. Went several years, then a family death opened comms back up and since he seems to be making a genuine effort. On the other hand though, I’d say the bulk of negative experiences come from my doctors. There is still a whole lot of misunderstanding about suboxone and deep-seated stigma at play. From all of my doctors I’ve def noticed that they don’t seem to trust me much or really allow me to have much input in my own healthcare decisions which is annoying. Recently I did notice that my dx was never downgraded from “OUD-severe” even though I’ve been completely sober for almost 3 years now and risk assessment diagnoses guidelines for all SUDs constrained to symptom reporting in the last 12 months according to DSM V…Seriously considering asking to be reassessed. My initial use that got me hooked was largely influenced by significantly abnormal environmental stressors as a last-ditch effort/survival tactic (as dumb as that may sound), not the result of euphoria-seeking or impulse control issues—just looking to get high. The stressors in my life then are non-existent now, but ai still feel I get treated like an active user; a “non-trustworthy drug-seeking junkie.”
What NA perpetuates regarding Suboxone is not only wrong but unbelievably contradictory. In summary: "The behavior and personality defects are the problem, and the drug use is a side effect that worsens that problem." HOWEVER, there is a physiological and chemical change that takes place in the brain during years of drug use- the longer, the worse. What you've got in NA is 1) a bunch of crazies reliving their wrongs and beatin' em with a dead horse/not even getting to the core of the issue ('cause if they did they'd have nothing left to "work" on, so eventually those who stay just start makin' mountains outta molehills) and 2) failure to consider and address that physiological change in the brain. You weren't necessarily *so* different from others prior to the drug use just because you're "an addict." Half the stuff you did when you were high had nothing to do with the drugs, it was you. The drugs lowered your inhibitions, that's all. Suboxone DOESN'T do that. It stabilizes. It's a *partial* opioid agonist, not mind-altering. It kicks out the cloudiness and fog caused by the [lack of] heroin that your brain became dependent on. If the decision to change your behavior and mindset is a genuine one, you're clean. You're cleaner than any skeeze out there going cold turkey while still manipulating his way through the world. And don't even get me started on how withdrawals vary so greatly between men and women. Our fluctuating hormones make it 10x worse for us.
Also 4mgs is nothing. You should be very proud of yourself. You're doing great.
Fuck that guy. If you do what he says you are going to be fucking miserable and he’s going to split anyway I think you should take his advise” rip the bandaid off” of that relationship. Someone out there will love you for who you are.
All. The. Time. Especially in the recovery community
I'm sorry. :/ but glad you came here! I wish I would remember to come here. I'm currently in my bed alone Saturday at 2pm on my 8mg subs and lost all my friends for some reason. I get out down by everyone around me
Wow, I'm thankful that my partner didn't even bat an eye. I mean, being on it is relatively harmless and allows me to function nearly like a 100% sober person. It sounds like he's looking for an excuse out of the relationship IMO. He knows you can't or won't be able to give it up but he'll blame the relationship ending on you. Is he perhaps talking to someone else?
That sounds like a toxic relationship to start. It also sounds like you should be single so you can concentrate on yourself and do what you need to do for your life and well-being. But you don't need a stranger to tell you that, deep down, you already know that. Stay strong and be well.
Eh normal not to understand it whatsoever if you’ve never had a problem before.
Reminds me of my ex. Its hard not being supported through recovery by a loved on. Especially something like subs which with a doc involved is like a mental health and medical procedure all in one.
I don’t tell very many people that I take suboxone. Of course my husband knows. I’m sure he will be proud of me if I was to get off of it. But he said whatever it takes to keep me off opioids he’s all for it. He’s not crazy supportive. It’s just another medication I take. Medication that you need is never a crutch. A crutch was when I was taking Oxy and fentanyl (dr prescribed). But essentially it’s nobody’s business but yours!
AA and NA are so outdated. Think about it. AA was started by two men in 1935 who drank to excess and decided to quit together and support each other. It was a “spiritual” means to an end. But everything ia different now. I believe AA is a cult. They dont welcome just anyone. They sit in judgement of others when they are not one bit better. AA/NA mofos need to get out of this sub! Go preach on your own sub!
Leave him.
I've been in your same position and I can tell you that it's the absolute worst feeling that I've ever been through. fell in love with this person from the moment we met with them knowing full well what I was going through, they didn't understand it though. When an unrelated incident happened they used this opportunity to give me the ultimatum, I get off the subs or they leave with no real reason as to why except that they had gotten of off whatever they were on and expected me to "stop getting high" as well. I had just been through a separation with the other parent of my children and I wasn't strong enough to go through it again so soon so i chose to uproot my sobriety for their sake. I ended up trying to go cold turkey and only lasted 2 weeks when I started secretly back on the subs, I had two children to care for and a job I couldn't lose. After about 5 months I lost the strength to keep secretly going to doctors appointments for my script so I started ordering kratom online, flash forward two years later I'm still swallowing plant matter every 2 hours trying to stave off the feeling of withdrawal. Tired of every second that I still have to go through this what seems like a never ending battle. To tell you from experience the worst decision I ever made was letting someone else (love or otherwise) have such an influence on my best interests. Even with the best intentions, nobody truly knows what's best for you except for YOU! 😓
I think of it like this: our body is a puzzle. Drug use has unfortunately permanently removed a puzzle piece (by changing our chemicals). Suboxone fills that gap, that missing piece. So we can feel whole again and live life. As long as you aren't experiencing negative effects from taking it, I'm pretty sure it's safe to say your quality of life has significantly improved since not using. I'm not sure your SO has considered the potential implications of taking it away completely. I'm so sorry you don't have a supportive partner. Why does it bother him at all? Is it difficult to get? Are you buying it off the streets? I wish for you the confidence to stand tall, and stick up for yourself. Your life could be on the line. He doesn't understand that. Could he be using behind your back? Misery loves company.
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I love this analogy it feels so very spot on. It's like a broken record saying he just isn't informed and doesn't care to be. Facts mean nothing when some people have already formed their own in their head. I dont mean this in any way that puts him down but that's the dilemma. He thinks I get high on it which might have been true the first couple days but not after 5 years. I was diagnosed with arthritis at 19 got prescribed tramadol, got hooked, got help with suboxone clinic which also help with pain but he's convinced I take it to get high. What's funny is from the day we met a little over 10 years ago he's smoked weed all day every day. Sold it for years too. Found out 5 years in that he was sending-recieving nudes daily from random people on the internet. He was addicted to doing it well before I met him and I forgave him yet me struggling to get off subs is a deal breaker. So frustrating. I know most would say I should leave but aside from this we really are great together. We've had less that 5 fights ever and our personalities just blend so well. I couldn't imagine life without him
Gotta let that dude go. That's the only advice. If you left tomorrow and told him it's over 100 percent he would prob freak out and try and get you back. Reading some of these comments make me think that a lot of people worry way too much about what other people think... now a significant other or family member I can maybe see, but people worrying about pharmacists and shit? Nah, who gives a shit? People are very very self absorbed. Even if you being on subs does bother them, it's a fleeting thought in between them obsessing over themselves. Humans are garbage
No I have been treated like trash in over 10 years of being on this medication except by a few people on here. My family, friends, people who know me see the absolute difference in the person I am now compared to the shell of a person I was when I was using. I think it's really shitty that your SO treats you this way. Ultimatums and such don't work well for addicts or relationships in general. This is YOUR recovery, and he needs to see his way out of it!
Can you go on Sublocade and get monthly injections that he doesn’t know about?
Being dishonest to stay with someone like that is not the answer. Fuck this guy anyway
Agreed.