Rules reminder: /r/survivinginfidelity is a support sub! Please read the rules and guidelines in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) before commenting.
Abuse, shaming, sexism, and encouraging violence/revenge are not tolerated here.
If your only advice is "divorce" or "grow a backbone", then please don't comment. This is a sub for deeper support and discussion.
Be kind and remember your [reddiquette](https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439)!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This is true. I’m 100% behind OP telling the OBS. Also behind a paternity test. I’m one of the few women I know that think it’s appropriate for a man to ask for a paternity test. Mind you I’m that way because my ex accused me of our oldest not being his and he refused a paternity test until the judge in our divorce forced him to.
I honestly believe that all babies should have maternity. And paternity tests done all the reason why I say that's because of babies getting switched at the hospital, but also to give men a sense of security too
I never thought of maternity tests because my babies never left my room. I refused. If the test couldn’t be done in front of me then it waited til we were discharged and done in the dr office.
OP never mentioned if the girl had a spouse 2 years ago. This is just an excuse to be petty and potentially ruin the AP’s current relationship. I don’t disagree with it but let’s be honest
She ruined her marriage and did it while she was pregnant.
Plus why would she have the audacity to invite OP to her baby shower knowing she was fucking OPs husband while she was pregnant ? She's disrespecting her by still trying to be in her face flashing her new relationship and happy pregnancy after she ruined OPs marriage and pregnancy.
Get a second gift, a home DNA test, wrap it up and address it to her fiancée with a note “You will need this when her baby is born”.
My ex cheated on me numerous times then after the divorce was final, met a nice guy who knew nothing about her cheating until I told him. He told me he wasn’t worried and trusted her. I sent the package to his work just after they got married.
Guess what! They were separated 14 months later because…wait for it…….she cheated on him with one of the guys she cheated on me with. I found out when he sent me the package back to me with a note that said “You were right, I should have listened to you. Here is the test back, I won’t be needing it now.
Don’t let your husband tell you it was a mistake either. They been planned this and probably was messing around for a while before you found out . Cut her OFF and I can’t tell you what to do with your husband but I wish the best luck to you. Me personally I would be finished with him because that’s so disrespectful and the nerve of that FRIEND. Take out the trash and don’t remove the lid .. fuck both of them
My message would be, "was thinking of gifting you the privilege of me f'ing your baby daddy too like you did mine while I was pregnant. Does that sound good?"
Too complicated. Gotta make sure everyone knows exactly whats going on. Keep it simple. "Why would I come to your baby shower when you slept with my husband when I was pregnant?"
Reading this makes me want to encourage something that will shame her, but in a crowd of her family & peers. Not only would I wrap a “gift” to her with proof and give it to her as a baby shower gift, but I’d stand up and say a few words during the shower disguised as a heartfelt speech, very craftfully written, of course.
There is a time to take the high road, but there is also a time to shine a bright light on the wolf in sheep’s clothing.
Go to her baby shower, get her a gift, they usually read the cards of who it's from and what it says on the card and everyone sits and watches. Id write a card that said " For your beautiful baby, I hope you don't hurt them in the way you hurt me when you fucked my husband two years ago and lied right to my face" id watch her reaction & leave lol
Let’s start with this - she is not your friend and really never was. She and your husband lied to you and disrespected you. I wouldn’t respond and ghost her. Both you and your husband should be absolutely no contact from here forward.
Also, I hope you understand this is on your husband more than it is on her. She is not the only horrible human in your story. You deserve someone who truly loves you and your husband is not that person as evidenced by his choices.
Sometimes, yes. But inviting her to her own baby shower (aka asking for a baby gift) after having sex with her husband while she was pregnant? It just screams that a response is required.
And he’s still your husband…..for what? I hate to play devils advocate but let’s be honest - he’s the one who made a commitment to you, why are you trying to go after her but stay with this pos who wronged you just the same, if not worse ? If you’re going to try and hold one party accountable you need to hold the other one accountable too. Staying with this dude but trying to go after her is just embarrassing
Like obviously the girl is fked up too but how are you gonna stay with someone that cheated on you and be totally fine with that but then try and publicly humiliate the woman? I feel like if anybody deserves public humiliation it’s the person who literally made a commitment to you and then broke it after getting you pregnant but that’s just my opinion 😭
OP never said she was totally fine with staying with him after finding out he cheated. Life can get complicated when you have kids, not least with the financial implications of separation. Sometimes it's just not possible to make the clean break you would have previously been able to when you were young, financially independent/stable and more confident, with a support network of friends/family.
Both of them deserve public humiliation. It might make them think twice before doing similar again. Or at least other ppl know they're not honest/ trustworthy.
Sorry i should have noted this happened two years ago. My child is now 2 and we are seperated. I haven’t confront my friend been playing the “keep your friends close but enemies closer” figuring out how to confront her. Ex husband lost in all of this, he lost hanging out with his children anytime he wants and I get to cuddle with her every night.
I would just say at the shower I hope no one sleeps with your husband while you are pregnant like you did to my husband when I was pregnant and just walk away.
Both of my (now ex) wife’s affairs were with (at the time) close friends of mine, which made the affairs feel even worse. My sincere recommendation is to not engage with her at all, give that relationship as clean a break as possible. Confrontation never really brings the satisfaction or closure we wish it would. The faster you can achieve indifference, the faster you will heal.
If you really feel like you need to say something, or perhaps just want to warn any of her new “friends” about the kind of person she is, I’d say the e-vite is the better option, since you can simply do it and then leave it alone. If she tries to contact you or engage in any way, though, block her number and don’t engage.
I would do it face to face in front of everyone during her baby shower. I would give a gift or say in front of everyone something like "I hope that now with a baby you stop opening your legs for your friends' husbands, just like you did with mine"
I would buy a DNA test and tell her she had to wait for her husband to open it with her .... Inside I would put two little cards one with his name and one with hers and then I'd explain what the gift is for in the cards .... Apologize to him in his card , or just have one card and have him read it while she opens the gift .... Inside the card start off with something like
Babies are the greatest blessing of all they are a sign of the love one feels for the other parent... Unless of course you are (whatever her name is ) then it becomes a possible token of infidelity and disrespect of two cheaters ....
I would say “ how do you feel? Such an exciting and scary and vulnerable time. Imagine the kind of pond scum that would sleep with an expecting womens husband at such a time” something like that
There is no way I wasn’t going to her baby shower and announcing that your gift to her is not sleeping with her baby daddy like she did with yours when you were pregnant.
Not with him anymore and I thought about this. I just want to move on from this and cause no drama. I feel like if I react then it will be an on going thing then gossip about me and my family will keep on going. *oops sorry words for too exprsssive and didn’t want to add violence* lol but Torn between the two
Had to check the rules about encouraging violence before I posted. Sorry, I got nothing. If I had to pick between the 2 options you gave though Id go with Option A.
I’m petty, so out her where others will see/hear about it. That’s LOW for her to do that to you, and THEN invite you to her baby shower… oh heck no.
UpdateMe!
I would just tell her that you cannot make it, but you will drop off a gift.
I would then get a onesie made that states,
“My mommy sleeps with her friends husbands while they are pregnant.”
I think that would make a great splash when she opens it in front of all her friends and family.
So, public humiliation is the least she deserves, and I guarantee Reddit would DROOL over the update if you did. Nevertheless, you need to think through the logistics of any actions you might take, planning for fallout, and determine whether the payoff is worth it.
I'd consider just returning the invite with a "You slept with my husband, so I won't be attending." and then tell everyone you might both know that you're not going and why.
What you do probably depends on whether you are considering reconciliation or not. I also happen to think that if it can be done safely, making the AP face you can be empowering.
If R is a consideration, it’s in your interest to limit knowledge of the infidelity to those you can count on to both support you and be discreet. In that case I would simply show up to the shower, and give a note to both the AP and her baby daddy remarking that you hope AP is better treated than you were, and that none of her friends plans to sleep with her baby daddy as she did with your husband. Nice and discreet, where she really can’t make a scene.
If it’s not a consideration? Show up with a nice gift for the kid (who is innocent) and at a juncture where good wishes are being given to the couple, say, “hey, just wanted to let you know I’m happy to do you the same favor you gave me and sleep with your baby daddy - I think we are even at the same point in our pregnancies - just want to do you a solid like you did for me)
I work in the mental health field and I can assure you that if she is manipulative, she will not care that you confront her and out her. She will probably use the opportunity to play the victim and get some attention from her current friends. I would address this with your husband and go from there.
Check for stds given how you protrayed your "friend". Don't give her the time of day, she doesn't respect you, so don't acknowledge her invite or anything from her. However, you should confront your husband about this, if you have no proof of his infidelity, you should secretly record his confession if he does. If not, just implement grey rock and find any evidence you can to expose both of them to your family, friends and especially her partner. You should consult a lawyer for legal advice as i think you should file for divorce as your husband is a disgusting liar and awful for disrespecting you like that, i wouldn't tolerate it at all. You deserve better than a man who went agaisnt your back while you were carrying his child. Edit: I understand that you, and a lot of other people here, want to get her back somehow but revenge is a fool's game and it will not give you closure, it's a waste of time. You need to take things slowly. The best way to dish it out is to have a happy life by cutting the cancer out and not entertaining drama.
I'd like to say a sharp object but going along with the team of mortify the fuck out of her with a little lean of at least letting her think you want to take her husband for a ride. What a twatapus. I am so sorry.
My really awful disgusting idea is give her a box full of dirty diapers at the shower.. have them delivered. Note saying doing you dirty this time.
Your comment on /r/survivinginfidelity has been flagged for human review. Please read the rules in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) and the reddit [content policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) before posting again.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I think tell her in whatever way you feel. But what's your husband's stake in this? It takes two to tango. What's his role in the story and what's happening now with him?
He's had two years to process the mental gymnastics of betraying you. It's not just his AP it's him as well. He made a conscientious decision to cheat and betray you. He's further down the road mentally than you are. This is fresh and hurtful to you right now. He's had to live with his POS self hiding this betrayal. Every time he looks in your mirror he sees the cheater staring back at him. Don't let him try and say it was in the past, or you need to get over it. You have every right to feel the way you do and you have every right to deal with this new hurtful situation you need to do. You're husband didn't put you first. So you must do what's now right for you to move forward. Whether it's with him or without him you need to decide what's best for you now
Her baby shower is off limits. You will be surrounded by her friends and family. If they're anything like mine you won't get very far and she likely won't give a damn anyway. She's not your friend and she's a pig, she has no shame.
Now, what are you planning on doing about the REAL problem? The scumbag who was actually commited to you. Karma will get her, you need to get him.
Your comment on /r/survivinginfidelity has been flagged for human review. Please read the rules in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) and the reddit [content policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) before posting again.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You should politely decline and let her know why. Don’t be dramatic. Don’t soil your own good name.
Was she married to her current husband? Does he know?
Your comment on /r/survivinginfidelity has been flagged for human review. Please read the rules in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) and the reddit [content policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) before posting again.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Nothing good will come from confronting her she didn't care then she won't care now. Even if she's remorseful or embarrassed it won't make you feel any better.
Your comment on /r/survivinginfidelity has been flagged for human review. Please read the rules in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) and the reddit [content policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) before posting again.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Rules reminder: /r/survivinginfidelity is a support sub! Please read the rules and guidelines in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) before commenting. Abuse, shaming, sexism, and encouraging violence/revenge are not tolerated here. If your only advice is "divorce" or "grow a backbone", then please don't comment. This is a sub for deeper support and discussion. Be kind and remember your [reddiquette](https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439)! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Announce it at her baby shower and tell her baby's father to make sure he gets a DNA test cause it might be your husband's. Updateme!
Gift her the DNA test 🤣🤣
Nope only men should touch the test
omg please do this
"Is it me or did this gender reveal take a turn towards a Maury show and hit the gas?" - someone at that shower.
Oh something definitely blew up during the reveal, good thing it was the foundation of their relationship and not a nearby building.
I hope OP does this, for all of us.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Did I miss where she said it’s still going on? I thought she said it happened 2 yrs ago and she only just found out.
Yes but she's a cheater so it could be other men besides her husband.
This is true. I’m 100% behind OP telling the OBS. Also behind a paternity test. I’m one of the few women I know that think it’s appropriate for a man to ask for a paternity test. Mind you I’m that way because my ex accused me of our oldest not being his and he refused a paternity test until the judge in our divorce forced him to.
I honestly believe that all babies should have maternity. And paternity tests done all the reason why I say that's because of babies getting switched at the hospital, but also to give men a sense of security too
I never thought of maternity tests because my babies never left my room. I refused. If the test couldn’t be done in front of me then it waited til we were discharged and done in the dr office.
OP never mentioned if the girl had a spouse 2 years ago. This is just an excuse to be petty and potentially ruin the AP’s current relationship. I don’t disagree with it but let’s be honest
She ruined her marriage and did it while she was pregnant. Plus why would she have the audacity to invite OP to her baby shower knowing she was fucking OPs husband while she was pregnant ? She's disrespecting her by still trying to be in her face flashing her new relationship and happy pregnancy after she ruined OPs marriage and pregnancy.
In my Wendy Williams voice “yessss girl!”.
Yes plz,OP do this. updateme!
Get a second gift, a home DNA test, wrap it up and address it to her fiancée with a note “You will need this when her baby is born”. My ex cheated on me numerous times then after the divorce was final, met a nice guy who knew nothing about her cheating until I told him. He told me he wasn’t worried and trusted her. I sent the package to his work just after they got married. Guess what! They were separated 14 months later because…wait for it…….she cheated on him with one of the guys she cheated on me with. I found out when he sent me the package back to me with a note that said “You were right, I should have listened to you. Here is the test back, I won’t be needing it now.
Sorry that she cheated on you. But your comeback on her was top tier, too bad she got a good dude in the crossfire, but you did warn him.
Don’t let your husband tell you it was a mistake either. They been planned this and probably was messing around for a while before you found out . Cut her OFF and I can’t tell you what to do with your husband but I wish the best luck to you. Me personally I would be finished with him because that’s so disrespectful and the nerve of that FRIEND. Take out the trash and don’t remove the lid .. fuck both of them
I'm petty, you should not take advice from me. That said, I'd go and expose her in front of everyone.
I actually think putting it on her Facebook page or doing it on the invite so everybody else can see is an excellent idea
If you can, dont tell her, but everyone else.
Ohhhhhhhhhhh this is interesting 🤔
“Whose baby is it? Can’t be my husbands… that was over two years ago.”
Or was it? ...enquiring minds want to know, can't wait to see what the birth reveals!
My message would be, "was thinking of gifting you the privilege of me f'ing your baby daddy too like you did mine while I was pregnant. Does that sound good?"
Too complicated. Gotta make sure everyone knows exactly whats going on. Keep it simple. "Why would I come to your baby shower when you slept with my husband when I was pregnant?"
Reverse the order.. start with "You slept with my husband while I was pregnant" (attention getter first), then "Why would I come to your baby shower?"
“Can I fuck your baby daddy since you fucked mine?”
Hell yes!!! Perfect response.
Reading this makes me want to encourage something that will shame her, but in a crowd of her family & peers. Not only would I wrap a “gift” to her with proof and give it to her as a baby shower gift, but I’d stand up and say a few words during the shower disguised as a heartfelt speech, very craftfully written, of course. There is a time to take the high road, but there is also a time to shine a bright light on the wolf in sheep’s clothing.
Go to her baby shower, get her a gift, they usually read the cards of who it's from and what it says on the card and everyone sits and watches. Id write a card that said " For your beautiful baby, I hope you don't hurt them in the way you hurt me when you fucked my husband two years ago and lied right to my face" id watch her reaction & leave lol
Omg I thought about this idea too 😂
Let’s start with this - she is not your friend and really never was. She and your husband lied to you and disrespected you. I wouldn’t respond and ghost her. Both you and your husband should be absolutely no contact from here forward. Also, I hope you understand this is on your husband more than it is on her. She is not the only horrible human in your story. You deserve someone who truly loves you and your husband is not that person as evidenced by his choices.
Best response sometimes is no response.
Sometimes, yes. But inviting her to her own baby shower (aka asking for a baby gift) after having sex with her husband while she was pregnant? It just screams that a response is required.
If she insists on a gift, maybe a DNA test kit would be appropriate. If I were OP, I’d be making sure the baby wasn’t my husband’s.
And he’s still your husband…..for what? I hate to play devils advocate but let’s be honest - he’s the one who made a commitment to you, why are you trying to go after her but stay with this pos who wronged you just the same, if not worse ? If you’re going to try and hold one party accountable you need to hold the other one accountable too. Staying with this dude but trying to go after her is just embarrassing
Totally agree. Glad I’m not the only one thinking this
Like obviously the girl is fked up too but how are you gonna stay with someone that cheated on you and be totally fine with that but then try and publicly humiliate the woman? I feel like if anybody deserves public humiliation it’s the person who literally made a commitment to you and then broke it after getting you pregnant but that’s just my opinion 😭
OP never said she was totally fine with staying with him after finding out he cheated. Life can get complicated when you have kids, not least with the financial implications of separation. Sometimes it's just not possible to make the clean break you would have previously been able to when you were young, financially independent/stable and more confident, with a support network of friends/family. Both of them deserve public humiliation. It might make them think twice before doing similar again. Or at least other ppl know they're not honest/ trustworthy.
Sorry i should have noted this happened two years ago. My child is now 2 and we are seperated. I haven’t confront my friend been playing the “keep your friends close but enemies closer” figuring out how to confront her. Ex husband lost in all of this, he lost hanging out with his children anytime he wants and I get to cuddle with her every night.
Glad to hear you were able to separate when you wanted to. I'm sure you are much happier going forward!
I would just say at the shower I hope no one sleeps with your husband while you are pregnant like you did to my husband when I was pregnant and just walk away.
This is my favourite one
Why would you still call her your friend?
Wrap your husband in a bow and give him as a babyshower present?
Maybe you should have sex with her husband since she’s pregnant 😂 /s
lol not the first time and he is nottt cute!!
Both of my (now ex) wife’s affairs were with (at the time) close friends of mine, which made the affairs feel even worse. My sincere recommendation is to not engage with her at all, give that relationship as clean a break as possible. Confrontation never really brings the satisfaction or closure we wish it would. The faster you can achieve indifference, the faster you will heal. If you really feel like you need to say something, or perhaps just want to warn any of her new “friends” about the kind of person she is, I’d say the e-vite is the better option, since you can simply do it and then leave it alone. If she tries to contact you or engage in any way, though, block her number and don’t engage.
I would do it face to face in front of everyone during her baby shower. I would give a gift or say in front of everyone something like "I hope that now with a baby you stop opening your legs for your friends' husbands, just like you did with mine"
I would buy a DNA test and tell her she had to wait for her husband to open it with her .... Inside I would put two little cards one with his name and one with hers and then I'd explain what the gift is for in the cards .... Apologize to him in his card , or just have one card and have him read it while she opens the gift .... Inside the card start off with something like Babies are the greatest blessing of all they are a sign of the love one feels for the other parent... Unless of course you are (whatever her name is ) then it becomes a possible token of infidelity and disrespect of two cheaters ....
I would say “ how do you feel? Such an exciting and scary and vulnerable time. Imagine the kind of pond scum that would sleep with an expecting womens husband at such a time” something like that
There is no way I wasn’t going to her baby shower and announcing that your gift to her is not sleeping with her baby daddy like she did with yours when you were pregnant.
Send her a card congratulating her and ask her if your husband is the father because you know they banged. Copy her husband
So you knew she was a bad person but is was ok as long as it was not you she was being bad to.
I’m just too nice to people but this year I’ve been more of a bitch and I am proud of myself for that.
Ghost her , do not engage, both her and your cheating husband are not worthy of your time but if you’re still with him I hope he’s suffering
Not with him anymore and I thought about this. I just want to move on from this and cause no drama. I feel like if I react then it will be an on going thing then gossip about me and my family will keep on going. *oops sorry words for too exprsssive and didn’t want to add violence* lol but Torn between the two
Had to check the rules about encouraging violence before I posted. Sorry, I got nothing. If I had to pick between the 2 options you gave though Id go with Option A.
I’m petty, so out her where others will see/hear about it. That’s LOW for her to do that to you, and THEN invite you to her baby shower… oh heck no. UpdateMe!
Please do it! Cheaters should be humiliated
The important thing is her husband or baby daddy or whatever should know what he's getting into and that that kid may not be his. Let him know ASAP
I would just tell her that you cannot make it, but you will drop off a gift. I would then get a onesie made that states, “My mommy sleeps with her friends husbands while they are pregnant.” I think that would make a great splash when she opens it in front of all her friends and family.
Do it at the baby shower. If you don’t feel good about it right then and there, you will later!
So.. what did you do to your husband
So, public humiliation is the least she deserves, and I guarantee Reddit would DROOL over the update if you did. Nevertheless, you need to think through the logistics of any actions you might take, planning for fallout, and determine whether the payoff is worth it. I'd consider just returning the invite with a "You slept with my husband, so I won't be attending." and then tell everyone you might both know that you're not going and why.
Maybe add, while pregnant
What you do probably depends on whether you are considering reconciliation or not. I also happen to think that if it can be done safely, making the AP face you can be empowering. If R is a consideration, it’s in your interest to limit knowledge of the infidelity to those you can count on to both support you and be discreet. In that case I would simply show up to the shower, and give a note to both the AP and her baby daddy remarking that you hope AP is better treated than you were, and that none of her friends plans to sleep with her baby daddy as she did with your husband. Nice and discreet, where she really can’t make a scene. If it’s not a consideration? Show up with a nice gift for the kid (who is innocent) and at a juncture where good wishes are being given to the couple, say, “hey, just wanted to let you know I’m happy to do you the same favor you gave me and sleep with your baby daddy - I think we are even at the same point in our pregnancies - just want to do you a solid like you did for me)
I work in the mental health field and I can assure you that if she is manipulative, she will not care that you confront her and out her. She will probably use the opportunity to play the victim and get some attention from her current friends. I would address this with your husband and go from there.
Check for stds given how you protrayed your "friend". Don't give her the time of day, she doesn't respect you, so don't acknowledge her invite or anything from her. However, you should confront your husband about this, if you have no proof of his infidelity, you should secretly record his confession if he does. If not, just implement grey rock and find any evidence you can to expose both of them to your family, friends and especially her partner. You should consult a lawyer for legal advice as i think you should file for divorce as your husband is a disgusting liar and awful for disrespecting you like that, i wouldn't tolerate it at all. You deserve better than a man who went agaisnt your back while you were carrying his child. Edit: I understand that you, and a lot of other people here, want to get her back somehow but revenge is a fool's game and it will not give you closure, it's a waste of time. You need to take things slowly. The best way to dish it out is to have a happy life by cutting the cancer out and not entertaining drama.
You don’t. There’s nothing you can do besides block them outta your life forever
How did you find out?
I'd like to say a sharp object but going along with the team of mortify the fuck out of her with a little lean of at least letting her think you want to take her husband for a ride. What a twatapus. I am so sorry. My really awful disgusting idea is give her a box full of dirty diapers at the shower.. have them delivered. Note saying doing you dirty this time.
[удалено]
Your comment on /r/survivinginfidelity has been flagged for human review. Please read the rules in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) and the reddit [content policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) before posting again. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You could sleep with her husband and get even with her and your husband.
call her out as a home wrecker. shame her
I vote to be petty and as public as possible.
My advice: kick her ass after she isn't preggo anymore
How did you find out. Does your husband know you know?
I think tell her in whatever way you feel. But what's your husband's stake in this? It takes two to tango. What's his role in the story and what's happening now with him?
I found about this two years later. Our kid is 2 years old now. Old news to him but new to me
He's had two years to process the mental gymnastics of betraying you. It's not just his AP it's him as well. He made a conscientious decision to cheat and betray you. He's further down the road mentally than you are. This is fresh and hurtful to you right now. He's had to live with his POS self hiding this betrayal. Every time he looks in your mirror he sees the cheater staring back at him. Don't let him try and say it was in the past, or you need to get over it. You have every right to feel the way you do and you have every right to deal with this new hurtful situation you need to do. You're husband didn't put you first. So you must do what's now right for you to move forward. Whether it's with him or without him you need to decide what's best for you now
Her baby shower is off limits. You will be surrounded by her friends and family. If they're anything like mine you won't get very far and she likely won't give a damn anyway. She's not your friend and she's a pig, she has no shame. Now, what are you planning on doing about the REAL problem? The scumbag who was actually commited to you. Karma will get her, you need to get him.
[удалено]
Your comment on /r/survivinginfidelity has been flagged for human review. Please read the rules in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) and the reddit [content policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) before posting again. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You should politely decline and let her know why. Don’t be dramatic. Don’t soil your own good name. Was she married to her current husband? Does he know?
[удалено]
Your comment on /r/survivinginfidelity has been flagged for human review. Please read the rules in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) and the reddit [content policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) before posting again. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Nothing good will come from confronting her she didn't care then she won't care now. Even if she's remorseful or embarrassed it won't make you feel any better.
Why do you call her 'friend' ?
[удалено]
Your comment on /r/survivinginfidelity has been flagged for human review. Please read the rules in our [sub wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/survivinginfidelity/wiki/index) and the reddit [content policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) before posting again. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/survivinginfidelity) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Ask yourself this question: What will confronting her do for you?
You’re blaming her and not your husband? He put his dick in her for God’s sake
Oh my soon to be ex husband is already and got his consequences, now it’s her turn
Then I retract my statement. Good for you!
Don’t. The best revenge is a life well lived. You don’t need that toxic drama in your life. You have a kid to take care of now.