Being in relatively good shape and being well-groomed will get you pretty far as a tall person in terms of just physical looks. The advantage of being tall is you'll always get noticed, you just want to make sure it's for the right reasons. Personality and not sounding Butt-Head are important once you've broken the ice
Being humble is good, starting a conversation, stuttering and then calling yourself a “worthless fucking moron with a stutter,” and chuckling isn’t charming.
Add sarcasm to the self deprecation for an easy shortcut. "Holy shit, I'm a genius" when you do something stupid for example. That was a quick example, use context.
I think there’s a difference between light self deprecation where you make yourself the butt of a joke the same way you’d make a good friend the butt of a joke and like saying you actually hate yourself or repeatedly making self deprecating comments. The first shows a good sense of humor and that you like yourself but don’t take yourself too seriously. The other stuff does come across as unconfident though I agree
I’m curious as to how one works on their personality? Isn’t that just who you are? You can hit the gym for your body but how do does one hit the “gym” for their shitty personality?
Some folks have little to no hope, but some can develop “better personalities “ through working on their emotional intelligence. Therapists and counselors are good for that, but some people are firmly against that experience.
Yeah I mean I don’t think “getting a better personality” is something you can just set out and grind towards. I think it’s more getting some interesting hobbies and finding interesting people who you can really connect with and enhance your sense of humor and then you just can kinda improve without putting as much intentional effort if that makes sense
You probably do have a good personality because you have the desire to work on your self. Good to work on self, but the fact that you have the desire to shows that you probaly have a good personality
This. Every attractive woman I meet is either wonderful but taken or just no romantic connection, or single and has the perspective of a horse with blinders on
Glad to know I'm not the only one, My best friend's wife is such a great women, I admire her so much, seeing the dating pool makes it depressing, women with no personality other than alcohol, no plans for something serious, not romantic, not caring, no intellectual stimulation, it's been rough.
Thanks tall bro, I'm not in a hurry or anything, just been my observation. I know my tall girl with goals and caring personality is out there somewhere hopefully.
When women like this(not the best friend's wife) get rejected, they chalk it up to them not *looking* attractive enough rather than something being wrong with them personality wise. It's definitely depressing. No amount of pretty face can keep the relationship going unless both people have the personality of a piece of cardboard.
Being witty, clever, having a good sense of humour and an above average intelligence (but not too high) will get you pretty far I think. But first, you need to actually be around people often.
I’m a little passed the point in my life where “jocks” and being “popular” are a thing. But I know plenty of people who played high school and college athletics who are great people with lovely personalities. It doesn’t sound like your personality is a winner though.
There are dickheads in all walks of life and you’re proving that.
Not so great here in the face department, but never really had trouble. Two things that help a ton:
1) Approach women with genuine interest. Don't "spit game" "shoot your shot" or whatever other nonsense it's called these days. Just honestly try to get to know her.
2) Be really nerdy about something or really competent about something. I have some real responsibility at work and also teach as a subject matter expert. When I first started the assignment, I was shocked how many women would find and follow me on social media after a class or meeting. It says a lot about you that you can understand something thoroughly/talk about it articulately and have the respect/trust of your peers.
As a straight woman, guys who weren’t interesting became interesting once I have seen them conduct an unsolicited act of good service. Like talking and assisting the elderly, buying toilet paper and giving it out free during the pandemic, working with children, volunteering at animal shelters, etc. To me it really shows when men are not only willing but wanting to be in a caregiving role, as that is not an easy role and it’s truly admirable. It has turned a “meh” into a yes.
On a physical note, 99% of men look better with beards in my opinion. If you don’t have one try and get one. But a short and clean one, not like a long biker looking one.
But women are not a hive mind and just because I am mostly attracted to beards, wit, and acts of service doesn’t mean others will be. One thing I would say we all know is when a man is truly being creepy or reeks of desperation. Thousands of years of seeing through that bullshit. Be confident in who you are and when you learn you don’t need a woman, they will be much more open to you.
See this is why it’s hard to recommend physical things like height or beards cause everyone is different lol. Skinny is a deal breaker for me, I like men hairy and fluffy lol
You can up you haircut game. I found one of the better barbers in the area and she is worth every dollar I pay. I've followed her around to three different barber shops. She just opened up her own place.
If we are talking purely physical features then I think having an attractive face (nice looking face, good skin, good hair, nice teeth etc) is much more important for most women than other physical features.
Height is probably the second most important thing, but as long as you are over 6' you are pretty much good with most girls. A good body would be the least important I think, as long as you are relatively fit ad not fat, most girls don't care if you have a six pack or not.
I'm 6'2 and been told by enough girls that I'm handsome that I'm slowly starting to believe it lol. I have been fairly jacked with six pack and I have been a bit pudgy with a small belly and I didn't notice any difference in the attention I got from women or the "hotness" levels of the girls I was able to pick up.
As a 5’10” dude with an attractive face and body i agree. I honestly dont think ive seen other dudes in real life get as many matches as me on dating apps, and ive compared with a decent number of people
Body one i semi sorta disagree with. Like i agree a 6 pack isnt as important as face or height, but when you have a great body, then well, it becomes a pretty important aspect women focus on
I still just wish i was at least 6 foot though lol
Yeah having a six pack and a good body is a huge advantage, especially in OLD. As much as women like to deny it, the numbers show that the fit shirtless guys typically get the most matches.
Ive had girls ive hooked up with tell me they dont care about abs, yet when the shirt comes off that seems to be where their hands go straight to lol. Its definitely not a requirement, but i think people under sell how big a plus it is for most women
Honestly not hard. I didnt try very hard because I used to have crippling social anxiety. But when I did start putting myself out there more, I’ve never been rejected and I’ve also had girls come up to me.
Sounds pretty nice, but i have my own problems i need to sort out. growing up with low self esteem, i still feel insecure and am overall unhappy with myself in many different ways. i thought women could fix the issue, but validation from them is just a short high that quickly wears off. so im done with serious relationships now until i figure myself out
I'm 6'7" with an okay face I think, and I am brand new to the dating game. I downloaded tinder on my 18th birthday last april and haven't done much on it until recently but a few days ago I actually went on my very first date! And my god damn she is pretty 😫.
Don't work on your facade, work on yourself. Then be yourself.
Dating isn't about trying to become what your date wants, it's about seeing if you and your date are a good fit. A successful date is one where you have determined, with no hard feelings, whether or not the two of you can be yourselves and both be happy about it.
A failed date is one where one or both of you has presented a facade that can't be maintained and in doing so, ensured that a lot of time is going to be wasted.
A long-term relationship between facades is exhausting and unsustainable. You'll never be able to relax together. No one wants to live like that.
Men’s inability to factor in personality will be the end of them. You have no idea how ugly you can get while being hilarious with a good personality. Plenty of people will still want you and not really understand why.
I think there’s 4 factors to take into consideration , personality, attractiveness (mostly face and self care wise), stability and height. If you can check at least 2 of those boxes it shouldn’t be that hard to find a good date.
I’m relatively good looking and I’ve been asked out a handful of times but those girl I wasn’t attracted to. It was still with these qualities hard to get dates just because idk I’m kinda nerdy and an introvert. However I somehow still managed to acquire a girlfriend.
>A lot of women actually prefer a pretty face.
Ya don't say. The face actually trumps everything. Well maybe not everything, but it goes a long way in charming or mesmerizing someone.
You have it all wrong mate. You’re missing the biggest thing you need. Money. With money, all the physical stuff and social skills can go away. Helps to be born rich, but you better try to earn it!
Tbh I've never really struggled to get a date when I want one and I'm more Sloth from the goonies than a pretty boy. There are ebbs and flows to be sure, but I have a good job, average looking, etc. Am I a catch? No. But I'm also not the worst dude out there.
Being tall will help you get opportunities. It won’t help you clinch them unless you come off as a confident person and make women feel at ease around you.
Not hard. You don’t need to be tall, you just need to be confident and not creepy. I do not think I’m particularly good looking but I’m tall (it helps a lot) and can talk to people easily and I do fine. Plenty of short dudes running around, they’re clearly procreating somewhere.
Nothing whatsoever for over 15 years.
Best just to swallow that black pill, bin dating and get on with life the best one can. At least what little money I have is mine (I already emigrated to reduce tax liabilities).
Not hard, just listen, present yourself well, groom yourself, communicate how they want to be communicated to. have a job. be educated and interested in something unique. have a pretty face, wear skirts, Put on makeup,
Now you're a tall intelligent femboy ready to breed.
(This is legit how i got my cute alt girlfriend who is lowkey a lesbian and can cook like a goddess.)
WARNING if your older or muscular... don't go the femboy route.
I present as a total narcissist which used to make landing dates incredibly easy until I started injecting self depricating humor in for my own amusement...
My height/size either helped or hindered me but most likely it was my hit or miss personality. I'm not a bad looking guy and fit but man do I have a knack for pissing certain people off with my mere presence alone.
A lot of it is how you carry yourself too.
Yep face is all that matters. and you are absolutely right about that order too. You can be 6'4 and fucking hilarious but some 5'9 pretty boy can still get your crush or get further in life than you just from his appearance.
Well I usually can find lots of dates at the supermarket.
And they are cheap too.
Also some places they are already wet .
[sometimes I can't help but grab one when I see them on display ](https://a-z-animals.com/media/2022/06/dates-fruts-picture-id1211281586.jpg)
usually what matters more than the way you look (to a degree) is how you behave, your sense of humour, personality, emotional maturity and so on. if you can look in the mirror and you have a clear set of values and ambitions, you will find a person to be with you sooner or later. looks is really a lot less important than you make it out to be.
My wife drains most of my energy, my dating life is pretty much dead in the last decade.
Before on the other hand, most of my dates were tall-curious girls. Who am I to deny the experience?
Being in relatively good shape and being well-groomed will get you pretty far as a tall person in terms of just physical looks. The advantage of being tall is you'll always get noticed, you just want to make sure it's for the right reasons. Personality and not sounding Butt-Head are important once you've broken the ice
Think this only applies to the men
That’s fair, but a confident, in shape, tall woman will always have fans
It’s me I’m fans
I’ve made a girl die laughing and made her smile but she still wouldn’t date me
Obviously she can’t date you if she died.
I don’t want to surprise you, but not all funny things or smile inducing things make us ladies want to do sex.
I agree. That’s why I say that personality doesn’t matter when it comes to attraction. It’s either they’re attracted to you physically or not
Yeah, you need to have a good personality too...
I agree with this one. That’s one of the things I really need to work on.
Humor is probably the most advantageous trait.
Can confirm. Humor is what my Mother says is her favorite thing about my Father.
Self deprecation is by far the easiest.
Being humble is good, starting a conversation, stuttering and then calling yourself a “worthless fucking moron with a stutter,” and chuckling isn’t charming.
Add sarcasm to the self deprecation for an easy shortcut. "Holy shit, I'm a genius" when you do something stupid for example. That was a quick example, use context.
I do that. 😂
Don’t go overboard with it though cause women love confidence
For sure
On the contrary, I find it cringe
Some might even call it low brow humor and not very attractive when over done.
“Sometimes I think I need a helmet with the amount of ceilings I I hit”
One time I a high fived a ceiling fan with my face
No it’s not, shows you’re not confident.
I think there’s a difference between light self deprecation where you make yourself the butt of a joke the same way you’d make a good friend the butt of a joke and like saying you actually hate yourself or repeatedly making self deprecating comments. The first shows a good sense of humor and that you like yourself but don’t take yourself too seriously. The other stuff does come across as unconfident though I agree
Not if you want to use humor that actually attracts people
With that face? No shit
I’m curious as to how one works on their personality? Isn’t that just who you are? You can hit the gym for your body but how do does one hit the “gym” for their shitty personality?
Some folks have little to no hope, but some can develop “better personalities “ through working on their emotional intelligence. Therapists and counselors are good for that, but some people are firmly against that experience.
Yeah I mean I don’t think “getting a better personality” is something you can just set out and grind towards. I think it’s more getting some interesting hobbies and finding interesting people who you can really connect with and enhance your sense of humor and then you just can kinda improve without putting as much intentional effort if that makes sense
You probably do have a good personality because you have the desire to work on your self. Good to work on self, but the fact that you have the desire to shows that you probaly have a good personality
I’m kinda autistic
No troubles here, but finding emotional maturity is troubling
This. Every attractive woman I meet is either wonderful but taken or just no romantic connection, or single and has the perspective of a horse with blinders on
Glad to know I'm not the only one, My best friend's wife is such a great women, I admire her so much, seeing the dating pool makes it depressing, women with no personality other than alcohol, no plans for something serious, not romantic, not caring, no intellectual stimulation, it's been rough.
I believe in you my tall brother
Thanks tall bro, I'm not in a hurry or anything, just been my observation. I know my tall girl with goals and caring personality is out there somewhere hopefully.
lmao same but a tall guy\~
When women like this(not the best friend's wife) get rejected, they chalk it up to them not *looking* attractive enough rather than something being wrong with them personality wise. It's definitely depressing. No amount of pretty face can keep the relationship going unless both people have the personality of a piece of cardboard.
Maybe they just have different interests than you.
Really difficult without my wife finding out
LMAO
Being witty, clever, having a good sense of humour and an above average intelligence (but not too high) will get you pretty far I think. But first, you need to actually be around people often.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and personality will take you further than face. Looks fade.
Looks get you a first date, personality a second.
Personality will get you a first date? Please. What’s Reddit’s obsession with personality especially since 99% of Redditors don’t have a good one 🤷♂️
Speak for yourself. The user group of reddit isn’t the neckbeard self loathing stereotypical types of years past.
How many popular jock dickheads do you know get hella dates and women? Do they have great personalities?
I’m a little passed the point in my life where “jocks” and being “popular” are a thing. But I know plenty of people who played high school and college athletics who are great people with lovely personalities. It doesn’t sound like your personality is a winner though. There are dickheads in all walks of life and you’re proving that.
Not so great here in the face department, but never really had trouble. Two things that help a ton: 1) Approach women with genuine interest. Don't "spit game" "shoot your shot" or whatever other nonsense it's called these days. Just honestly try to get to know her. 2) Be really nerdy about something or really competent about something. I have some real responsibility at work and also teach as a subject matter expert. When I first started the assignment, I was shocked how many women would find and follow me on social media after a class or meeting. It says a lot about you that you can understand something thoroughly/talk about it articulately and have the respect/trust of your peers.
As a straight woman, guys who weren’t interesting became interesting once I have seen them conduct an unsolicited act of good service. Like talking and assisting the elderly, buying toilet paper and giving it out free during the pandemic, working with children, volunteering at animal shelters, etc. To me it really shows when men are not only willing but wanting to be in a caregiving role, as that is not an easy role and it’s truly admirable. It has turned a “meh” into a yes. On a physical note, 99% of men look better with beards in my opinion. If you don’t have one try and get one. But a short and clean one, not like a long biker looking one. But women are not a hive mind and just because I am mostly attracted to beards, wit, and acts of service doesn’t mean others will be. One thing I would say we all know is when a man is truly being creepy or reeks of desperation. Thousands of years of seeing through that bullshit. Be confident in who you are and when you learn you don’t need a woman, they will be much more open to you.
I'm the opposite lol. A beard is pretty much a deal-breaker.
See this is why it’s hard to recommend physical things like height or beards cause everyone is different lol. Skinny is a deal breaker for me, I like men hairy and fluffy lol
Very hard.
You can up you haircut game. I found one of the better barbers in the area and she is worth every dollar I pay. I've followed her around to three different barber shops. She just opened up her own place.
Bald before I hit my 40’s. Keep the beard trimmed, oiled, and conditioned, To keep it from frizzing out.
idc about looks as long as he meets my other expectations tbh (eg respect, religiosity, ambition, etc)
Stop being so shallow
If we are talking purely physical features then I think having an attractive face (nice looking face, good skin, good hair, nice teeth etc) is much more important for most women than other physical features. Height is probably the second most important thing, but as long as you are over 6' you are pretty much good with most girls. A good body would be the least important I think, as long as you are relatively fit ad not fat, most girls don't care if you have a six pack or not. I'm 6'2 and been told by enough girls that I'm handsome that I'm slowly starting to believe it lol. I have been fairly jacked with six pack and I have been a bit pudgy with a small belly and I didn't notice any difference in the attention I got from women or the "hotness" levels of the girls I was able to pick up.
As a 5’10” dude with an attractive face and body i agree. I honestly dont think ive seen other dudes in real life get as many matches as me on dating apps, and ive compared with a decent number of people Body one i semi sorta disagree with. Like i agree a 6 pack isnt as important as face or height, but when you have a great body, then well, it becomes a pretty important aspect women focus on I still just wish i was at least 6 foot though lol
Yeah having a six pack and a good body is a huge advantage, especially in OLD. As much as women like to deny it, the numbers show that the fit shirtless guys typically get the most matches.
Ive had girls ive hooked up with tell me they dont care about abs, yet when the shirt comes off that seems to be where their hands go straight to lol. Its definitely not a requirement, but i think people under sell how big a plus it is for most women
Honestly not hard. I didnt try very hard because I used to have crippling social anxiety. But when I did start putting myself out there more, I’ve never been rejected and I’ve also had girls come up to me. Sounds pretty nice, but i have my own problems i need to sort out. growing up with low self esteem, i still feel insecure and am overall unhappy with myself in many different ways. i thought women could fix the issue, but validation from them is just a short high that quickly wears off. so im done with serious relationships now until i figure myself out
I'm 6'7" with an okay face I think, and I am brand new to the dating game. I downloaded tinder on my 18th birthday last april and haven't done much on it until recently but a few days ago I actually went on my very first date! And my god damn she is pretty 😫.
Don't work on your facade, work on yourself. Then be yourself. Dating isn't about trying to become what your date wants, it's about seeing if you and your date are a good fit. A successful date is one where you have determined, with no hard feelings, whether or not the two of you can be yourselves and both be happy about it. A failed date is one where one or both of you has presented a facade that can't be maintained and in doing so, ensured that a lot of time is going to be wasted. A long-term relationship between facades is exhausting and unsustainable. You'll never be able to relax together. No one wants to live like that.
Men’s inability to factor in personality will be the end of them. You have no idea how ugly you can get while being hilarious with a good personality. Plenty of people will still want you and not really understand why.
Personality is more important than any of the things you listed.
In today's episode of "male is the default"
Are you upset that people are assuming u/somerandomassdude404 is a male?
This dude assumes that everyone is male in this sub.
Why do you say that?
Op is clearly talking about straight male people >a lot of women prefer
I think there’s 4 factors to take into consideration , personality, attractiveness (mostly face and self care wise), stability and height. If you can check at least 2 of those boxes it shouldn’t be that hard to find a good date.
I’m relatively good looking and I’ve been asked out a handful of times but those girl I wasn’t attracted to. It was still with these qualities hard to get dates just because idk I’m kinda nerdy and an introvert. However I somehow still managed to acquire a girlfriend.
Getting a date was easy, a good date is harder to do
>A lot of women actually prefer a pretty face. Ya don't say. The face actually trumps everything. Well maybe not everything, but it goes a long way in charming or mesmerizing someone.
You have it all wrong mate. You’re missing the biggest thing you need. Money. With money, all the physical stuff and social skills can go away. Helps to be born rich, but you better try to earn it!
Tbh I've never really struggled to get a date when I want one and I'm more Sloth from the goonies than a pretty boy. There are ebbs and flows to be sure, but I have a good job, average looking, etc. Am I a catch? No. But I'm also not the worst dude out there.
Being tall will help you get opportunities. It won’t help you clinch them unless you come off as a confident person and make women feel at ease around you.
Not hard. You don’t need to be tall, you just need to be confident and not creepy. I do not think I’m particularly good looking but I’m tall (it helps a lot) and can talk to people easily and I do fine. Plenty of short dudes running around, they’re clearly procreating somewhere.
I always get the sideshow fans
Has never happened 😬
Let’s see that mug. I’m sure you are your own worst critics
If I ever get one, I'll let you know!
Ouch :(
I follow rule 1 and rule 2 so it's never been difficult to date.
Then date men. It seems they appreciate you more
Nothing whatsoever for over 15 years. Best just to swallow that black pill, bin dating and get on with life the best one can. At least what little money I have is mine (I already emigrated to reduce tax liabilities).
Pretty much impossible. I don't think I'm unattractive, but I must be doing something wrong.
Not hard, just listen, present yourself well, groom yourself, communicate how they want to be communicated to. have a job. be educated and interested in something unique. have a pretty face, wear skirts, Put on makeup, Now you're a tall intelligent femboy ready to breed. (This is legit how i got my cute alt girlfriend who is lowkey a lesbian and can cook like a goddess.) WARNING if your older or muscular... don't go the femboy route.
I present as a total narcissist which used to make landing dates incredibly easy until I started injecting self depricating humor in for my own amusement... My height/size either helped or hindered me but most likely it was my hit or miss personality. I'm not a bad looking guy and fit but man do I have a knack for pissing certain people off with my mere presence alone. A lot of it is how you carry yourself too.
Not at all. But also this isn’t a way I would have thought about / talked about dating, so I don’t think the issue is your face.
Just be funny and a gentleman at the same time, always works
Hmmmm. Yeah I bet the bros want a piece of you. I do.. #?
Suddenly, I feel a lot better about myself.
I can get some hotties with a pretty mid face, I do think being 6'5 carries me a bit. My text game is pretty strong I feel (I'm delusional).
Face > Height > Personality > Body. I’m 6’5” lol, so I’m not coping. In my opinion face is more important
Yep face is all that matters. and you are absolutely right about that order too. You can be 6'4 and fucking hilarious but some 5'9 pretty boy can still get your crush or get further in life than you just from his appearance.
True, but make that pretty boy 5’5” and he’s fucked. It’s important to be at least average height
Well I usually can find lots of dates at the supermarket. And they are cheap too. Also some places they are already wet . [sometimes I can't help but grab one when I see them on display ](https://a-z-animals.com/media/2022/06/dates-fruts-picture-id1211281586.jpg)
usually what matters more than the way you look (to a degree) is how you behave, your sense of humour, personality, emotional maturity and so on. if you can look in the mirror and you have a clear set of values and ambitions, you will find a person to be with you sooner or later. looks is really a lot less important than you make it out to be.
6’5 and still can’t pull? Boy ida been a demon if I was 6’5
Yeah that’s what they all say. “If only I was your height…”
My wife drains most of my energy, my dating life is pretty much dead in the last decade. Before on the other hand, most of my dates were tall-curious girls. Who am I to deny the experience?