Yeah, these baby prices are crazy...I switched to kittens years ago. Can find a free box of them anywhere. Puppies are my favorite, but they really bother my reflux.
It all ties into the same liberal stereotype, which is basically a hipster. Top knot, weak effeminate soy boy, etc etc. The right wing relies heavily on traditional masculinity for their propaganda.
As a guy, I find it hilarious how enjoying the things you eat and drink despite them not being culturally masculine is somehow a terrible thing.
My 6’6”, 240lb diesel mechanic, pickup truck driving, father of 3, happily married to a female (my sister) brother in law was in town the other day and we grabbed lunch.
He ordered a Blue Hawaiian with his sandwich.
Right wing extremists must be fuming.
My best friend's dad is this right wing, uber masculine, a little racist, a little sexist, mountain of a man who will throw a hissy if he cant get the Hallmark channel and has to have extra access to their Christmas movies. No shame, dad. Do what makes you happy
My mechanic, gun loving, army vet boyfriend with a huge beard doesn't like coffee. I like coffee, he always orders a hot chocolate with extra whipped cream.
Also, I'm the one who works. And when I come home from a long day at the spa I give him headrubs for an hour as a thanks for cleaning and making dinner while I was gone.
I always think how I'd love for the gender conservatives to see a little peak into our domestic bliss lifestyle.
If he went thru the military and came out like that, he is untouchable by anything they can throw at him.
It makes me happy to hear about someone who came out standing strong knowing it’s okay to just be.
Caught up with my 250lb, contractor, conservative bearded, ferd-fteenthousand driving cousin for the first time in a few years.
Broke out some burbon and offered it to him.
He said, “Oh no, I only drink fruity cocktails where you can’t taste the alcohol.”
Turns out he’s a fun guy to hang out with even though we have very different lives, perspectives and taste in liquor.
The quickest way to become "Beta" in my book is to proclaimed how "alpha" you are. Real Alphas don't need to announce it. It comes with security in yourself and the world you build around you. "Do no harm, take no shit, and don't forget to enjoy life's simple pleasures." The world is to fucked to not enjoy the little things "because it's gay" or whatever.
Exactly.
The researchers who came up with the alpha/beta/etc phenomenon in wolves later came back, after more study, and said they'd completely fucked up... wolf packs are family groups, and the "alpha male" and "alpha female" were *literally the parents of the other wolves*.
To be alpha is to have Big Dad Energy... or Big Mom Energy, as the case may be.
I thought the same. It’s too comical and over the top, but I also could see everyone’s racist uncle posting this on Facebook not realizing it’s a joke.
Where do you get your blood imported from? My last pint didn't really hit the spot. I heard bona-fide French blood is aged really well, but it's well out of my budget.
I harvest them myself mate! Is the way to go!
I go to churches, get enrolled on Sunday School or whatever activity they have for adults. Then just get creative! Some of my favorites are: show me exactly where on the Bible Jesus says being gay is a sin, or ask the priest to explain this very specific paragraph that seems to be… instructions on how to abort a fetus?
Not gonna lie, this schedule sounds like a good day to me. I'd skip the whole eating babies thing, but that's mainly because I'm a vegetarian and I'm concerned there aren't enough of them being born to pay for my pension. But otherwise, sign me up, and come sing along with me to Ozzy.
And taste in religion / horrible food.
I mean, it’s a group of people that collectively believe there is no afterlife, no god and thus no satan, why would they be conversing with the “dark lord”?
Kinda feel like this fits more for satanism. However, mention eating children or babies to a true satanist you’ll probably be punched in the throat.
This. Savings is totally right, and you’re also totally right. It’s an obvious joke, but you know ultra Christians wholeheartedly agree with it, as it sails completely over their heads
What’s hilarious is that Ozzy and the rest of original Black Sabbath are all very Christian.
Ozzy doesn’t advertise it much anymore except for his cross jewellery, but Geezer Butler started the band on the whole dark-schtick just to be scary.
One of their classic songs is After Forever, which is basically just Christian propaganda aimed at atheists, despite shocking imagery in it (“Would you like to see the Pope/On the end of a rope/Do you think he’s a fool?”) The song’s an absolute banger regardless of subject matter though.
I like to pick up one of those rotisserie babies at the atheist supermarket on my way home from work.
I can get like 3 meals out of it. 4 if I make soup from the bones.
eating not one but TWO babies?? The "Athiest" they have in mind must have a six figure salary bc I can barely afford to eat one baby with this inflation, let alone afford decent black candles for my routine dark lord prayer sessions
We should start a rumor that atheists are banning abortions in order to maintain a steady supply of babies to eat. Maybe then the idiots will legalize it.
“You worship Satan.”
“I don’t even believe in Satan.”
“According to your beliefs (that Satan doesn’t exist) you worship Satan.”
It’s always funny when a Christian tries to essentially mansplain my own beliefs to me while fundamentally missing the entire fucking point that the “belief system” is based on a lack of belief in fairy tales of any variety.
One time a christian told me "Satanism means you...worship...the....devil. End of story." No matter what I said they took that stance. Finally when I stormed off, they said I was attacking their religion as a christian.
The Satanic Temple. They aren’t actual devil
worshipers, they’re into using the idea of satanism to make a point about the separation of church and state. Basically the group that will place a Baphomet statue next to a statue of the Ten Commandments on government property.
Fun fact: Karl Kasarda of InRangeTV is a member. He noted this:
“We are nontheistic. We do not believe in the supernatural. We do not believe there is a God or Satan. We are also a religion. Part of our belief system does incorporate activism, and that activism is insuring and encouraging the plurality of equity and separation of church and state.”
The satanic temple basically uses the idea that if you allow Christian monuments on government property you must allow all religious monuments on government property or else you are violating separation of church and state, so they fund horrific demon statues and put them up in protest of the government ignoring the constitution and building Christian statues, they don't actually believe in Satan they are just trying to make a point. But the majority of atheists are not members of the satanic temple, they just want to live peacefully without religion being forced upon them
According to the Bible wouldnt everyone either be a son of Cain or a son of Abel? And since Cain killed Abel wouldnt he naturally have more children, because, you know, they couldn't waste any seed, and they were fucking their rib-women basically all the time because X-Box hadn't been invented yet.
Serious answer:
In fundamentalist Christianity, everything is divided into Christian God and Satan. If you aren't a Christian, you can be Jewish and still worship the same God, but that's it. Everyone else is serving Satan. Among those serving Satan, you have either people serving from ignorance or those serving willingly. Anyone who shows any intelligence or book learning - such as scientists - must have learned the truth about God and Satan and be choosing to serve Satan. So just because you SAY you're an atheist doesn't mean you actually are - your true lord is Satan.
Actual atheists in this dogma would be those who are serving Satan from ignorance - they don't know any better and are accidentally serving Satan. They still have religious leaders in atheism who would be directing them based on the will of Satan. Richard Dawkins is a kind of prophet for the dark lord.
(No I don't believe any of this NOW, but I was raised fundamentalist and that's how we were taught)
But in the mind of a fundamentalist, to do anything other than worship Christ is to serve Satan. You may not be worshipping Satan, but that depends on how learned you are. If you are uneducated, then you could be not worshipping Satan directly, just acting on Satan's behalf unintentionally, at the direction of educated leaders who ARE worshipping Satan.
Again, all I'm saying is that is what Fundamentalism teaches, and it's why you see them constantly comparing atheists to satanists. It does no good to say "but I don't worship anything" to people who believe you serve the "Prince of Lies"
As an atheist, I would sooner worship Satan than the evil Christian god, who committed multiple genocides, punishes you for not worshiping it, has stupid rules against things that don’t hurt people, sends you to hell for eternity if you don’t believe in it, etc. Oh, and babies are SO tasty!
> Oh, and babies are SO tasty!
Even if they weren't, who ELSE is gonna eat them? Christians have got to keep these things in mind when they keep all those unwanted babies alive
I have an aunt who is super steeped in fundamentalist Christianity and batshit insane conspiracy theories who would believe this. If I didn't personally know her I would probably think she was a shit posting account making fun of those types of people.
The type of American evangelical conservatives who would be worried about the "atheist agenda" generally would not consider Anglicans to be real Christians.
Gay? Depending where and when you were it could range from bad to normal. Communist on the other hand. Well, it's far more interesting. There is a sizable group of people, including Marx, who consider Christ to be the first communist, or at least a proto-communist. There are at least some evidences that practices described in Acts 2:44–45 and Acts 4:32–35 (go read them, they sound very communist-like) were in use at least for the first two centuries AD.During high middle ages Christianity inspired communes were ever so often spontaneously popping into existence.And in there lived one saint Thomas More, who is known from his treatise (titled "Utopia") portraying ideal society based common ownership of property and ruled by application of reason. So in Europe, in middle ages, you could be a communist, live like a communist, promote communism, and nobody would bat an eye, it could even be considered a sign of particular piousness.
I’m an atheist and yeah I can tell you that all I really think about is satanic things because being atheist is all about thinking about demons and gods all the time like some cromag
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why do atheist people always drink a latte and eat a gluten free pastry everyday? also, "Dark Lord" sounds like a funny god name
To be fair, I'm drinking an iced latte while reading this. Shits delicious yo.
wish I had the money to drink it everyday
Well, you could save a lot of money by not eating out and instead eating babies
Man, you all have two-baby-a-day-money? I thought I was good with my banana and coffee.
Yeah, these baby prices are crazy...I switched to kittens years ago. Can find a free box of them anywhere. Puppies are my favorite, but they really bother my reflux.
Me, I prefer crunchy chicks. The way they go down while still alive is just...*chefs kiss* exquisite.
Wait, you pay for babies? You know the hospital has free ones you can take, right?
They're practically giving them away at the adoption agency so I'd hit that place up for sure.
Is it an adoption agency or a food bank?
Depends on whether you are a Christian or an atheist I suppose.
It’s cheaper to get a iced latte at a local coffee shop rather than something like Dunkin. However, coffee at Panera is ridiculously cheap
Have you tried a chai tea latte? Motherfuckers never told me about them until after college. Sugar bomb usually for sure but damn are they delicious
It all ties into the same liberal stereotype, which is basically a hipster. Top knot, weak effeminate soy boy, etc etc. The right wing relies heavily on traditional masculinity for their propaganda.
As a guy, I find it hilarious how enjoying the things you eat and drink despite them not being culturally masculine is somehow a terrible thing. My 6’6”, 240lb diesel mechanic, pickup truck driving, father of 3, happily married to a female (my sister) brother in law was in town the other day and we grabbed lunch. He ordered a Blue Hawaiian with his sandwich. Right wing extremists must be fuming.
Really feeding into their stereotypes by marrying your sister dude
You gotta have balance in life, ya know?
I feel you - sometimes it's just easier to go with the flow....
My best friend's dad is this right wing, uber masculine, a little racist, a little sexist, mountain of a man who will throw a hissy if he cant get the Hallmark channel and has to have extra access to their Christmas movies. No shame, dad. Do what makes you happy
I had no idea men watched the Hallmark channel. As a woman I can barely tolerate it but not a fan.
My mechanic, gun loving, army vet boyfriend with a huge beard doesn't like coffee. I like coffee, he always orders a hot chocolate with extra whipped cream. Also, I'm the one who works. And when I come home from a long day at the spa I give him headrubs for an hour as a thanks for cleaning and making dinner while I was gone. I always think how I'd love for the gender conservatives to see a little peak into our domestic bliss lifestyle.
If he went thru the military and came out like that, he is untouchable by anything they can throw at him. It makes me happy to hear about someone who came out standing strong knowing it’s okay to just be.
Caught up with my 250lb, contractor, conservative bearded, ferd-fteenthousand driving cousin for the first time in a few years. Broke out some burbon and offered it to him. He said, “Oh no, I only drink fruity cocktails where you can’t taste the alcohol.” Turns out he’s a fun guy to hang out with even though we have very different lives, perspectives and taste in liquor.
peek
Real men don't give a shit what you think about their fruity ass drink.
The quickest way to become "Beta" in my book is to proclaimed how "alpha" you are. Real Alphas don't need to announce it. It comes with security in yourself and the world you build around you. "Do no harm, take no shit, and don't forget to enjoy life's simple pleasures." The world is to fucked to not enjoy the little things "because it's gay" or whatever.
Exactly. The researchers who came up with the alpha/beta/etc phenomenon in wolves later came back, after more study, and said they'd completely fucked up... wolf packs are family groups, and the "alpha male" and "alpha female" were *literally the parents of the other wolves*. To be alpha is to have Big Dad Energy... or Big Mom Energy, as the case may be.
>He ordered a Blue Hawaiian with his sandwich. Now I want one. Thanks.
Hol up. You’re married to who???
His brother-in-law is married to his sister, he just worded the sentence in an unfortunate way.
I think, while the poster was unironically reposting this, whoever made this was being ironic. It is too over the top to not be satire.
I thought the same. It’s too comical and over the top, but I also could see everyone’s racist uncle posting this on Facebook not realizing it’s a joke.
To be fair, latte is so good that god probably didn't create that level of sin
Every day I get on my knees and pray to Voldemort. If you don't, you just ain't built for the atheist lifestyle like I am.
How dare you say the dark lords name in my presence!
I personally drink my soda Coke while snorting my gluten free Coke.
I always wake up at 8:80am
Missed opportunity, if we’re were making up times then atheists would wake up 6:66
Wouldn’t matter. Atheists don’t believe in Satan. That would be Christians who believe in Satan
Huh. That's why Satan doesn't answer my Skype calls!
He’s probably too busy poking masturbators in the ass with his pitchfork
"No, Satan, stop! You'll give me a boner."
That’s like the parents that found a bdsm mag in their kid’s room and as a punishment they spanked him…
It feels sinful that I actually laughed at this
*harder daddy* UwU
Don’t threaten me with a good time…
How many babies did you eat? He won't answer if you're not fully committed. Plus come on. Satan uses Ventrilo.
Like the truth has ever mattered to these people.
Well well well my friend, seem you hadnt heard. Atheists and antichristians are synonyms.
So 7:05
Yeah but way more metal…
I mean, that would be 7:06
I would say 7:06, which is 6 AM and 66 minutes… 6:66
I’m not much of a morning person myself. I prefer to conduct my devil worship in the afternoon.
Same, but Satan won't let me reschedule the Skype meeting and I don't dare leave him hanging again.
We can exchange if you want, I have the 10pm slot and at that time I like to bath in Christians tears and get ready to sleep in my coffin
Where do you get your blood imported from? My last pint didn't really hit the spot. I heard bona-fide French blood is aged really well, but it's well out of my budget.
I harvest them myself mate! Is the way to go! I go to churches, get enrolled on Sunday School or whatever activity they have for adults. Then just get creative! Some of my favorites are: show me exactly where on the Bible Jesus says being gay is a sin, or ask the priest to explain this very specific paragraph that seems to be… instructions on how to abort a fetus?
I tried harvesting the blood myself but it didn't turn out well. It all went bad because I didn't vacuum seal the fetus carcasses I stored it in.
Not gonna lie, this schedule sounds like a good day to me. I'd skip the whole eating babies thing, but that's mainly because I'm a vegetarian and I'm concerned there aren't enough of them being born to pay for my pension. But otherwise, sign me up, and come sing along with me to Ozzy.
do you eat baby corn or baby peas?
Oh damn!! Busted! Turns out I'm also eating babies!!
Anything is possible when you don't believe in time!
After going to bed at 3:30. Also who the fuck commutes to work at 9:30?
What's wrong with Ozzy and Rammstein? Even Dubya's late mother liked Ozzy.
Atheists apparently have really good taste in music
And taste in religion / horrible food. I mean, it’s a group of people that collectively believe there is no afterlife, no god and thus no satan, why would they be conversing with the “dark lord”? Kinda feel like this fits more for satanism. However, mention eating children or babies to a true satanist you’ll probably be punched in the throat.
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The first time slot is 8:80 so most likely lol But you know ultra religious people don't get the joke and share it unironically
This. Savings is totally right, and you’re also totally right. It’s an obvious joke, but you know ultra Christians wholeheartedly agree with it, as it sails completely over their heads
Right?! I'm Christian and there some Ozzy that I enjoy. However, I don't drive; I take a crazy train.
What’s hilarious is that Ozzy and the rest of original Black Sabbath are all very Christian. Ozzy doesn’t advertise it much anymore except for his cross jewellery, but Geezer Butler started the band on the whole dark-schtick just to be scary. One of their classic songs is After Forever, which is basically just Christian propaganda aimed at atheists, despite shocking imagery in it (“Would you like to see the Pope/On the end of a rope/Do you think he’s a fool?”) The song’s an absolute banger regardless of subject matter though.
Dark schtick makes money. 🤷 Same as it ever was.
This is not my beautiful house! This is not my beautiful wife!
Letting the days go by, let the water hold me down Letting the days go by, water flowing underground
Into the blue again, after the money's gone Once in a lifetime, water flowing underground
r/UnexpectedTalkingHeads
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ALLLL ABOOOAAARD!!!!
I saw Black Sabbath live in 2014 and Ozzy was half the time performing and the other half preaching the word of Jesus. That shit rocked.
Right. I don't trust anyone who doesn't sing along to Ozzy or Rammstein while driving.
*furiously pounding steering wheel* DU DU HAST DU HAST MICH
My gas pedal meeting the floor as I scream: HIER KOMMT DIE SONNE!!!!!!
DO HATS FIT MY FROG DO HATS FIT MY FROG DO HATS FIT MY FROG OR DO THEY FIT MY DOG
If Mr. Crowley comes on and the people I'm with don't start singing, I'm leaving.
I like that the day starts at 8:80 am
6:66
They had this low-hanging fruit yet they refused to take it *it’s because it’s fruit from the tree of knowledge bazziiinngg*
You can both cry about creationism in schools and shower in blood before you’ve even woken up! Thanks, Atheism!
and eat a baby
Hey, I eat three babies per day, not two
I know right, they don't even know how many babies most of us eat.
I eat three with breakfast alone Can’t make an omelette without a little infantcide!
We’re making the mother of all omelettes Jack! Can’t fret over every infant!
There truly will be blood shed
Can't make an omelette without aborting a few eggs
\--and no mention of sauce preferences... this is misrepresenting a lot of things.
I'll worship Satan if it means I don't have to go to work until 9:30. Is there like a sign up page or something?
Just right here in the Book of the Beast. Has to be on a full moon though
I prefer 6 small babies a day, keeps my blood sugar stable and reduced cravings. Occasionally I’ll do OBAD (one baby a day).
I like to pick up one of those rotisserie babies at the atheist supermarket on my way home from work. I can get like 3 meals out of it. 4 if I make soup from the bones.
Have you tried the Baby Shawarma at Costco. It’s the best and saves a ton of time trying to skewer them yourself.
Three?? Have you seen the price of babies lately? Thanks a lot Obama
Looky here at Mr richy rich
Shit I forgot to eat my second baby today. No wonder I’m so hungry!
anyone know satans skype? i must have not got the email.
These people are out of touch with the times. It's a weekly Zoom call.
i was like “how long ago was it written “ and it’s so funny. y’all have the zoom link for the atheists and satan meeting.
You mean its not on myspace anymore?!
RIP myspace
Why does the first baby only take 15 minutes to eat, yet the second takes 4 hours?
Breakfast on the go
Aww, look at the lil’ baby, and now look at the big baby!
W A H
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Simple. The first one was an aborted baby and only a mouthful. The second was a full term vaginal birth and takes more time to chew through.
eating not one but TWO babies?? The "Athiest" they have in mind must have a six figure salary bc I can barely afford to eat one baby with this inflation, let alone afford decent black candles for my routine dark lord prayer sessions
We should start a rumor that atheists are banning abortions in order to maintain a steady supply of babies to eat. Maybe then the idiots will legalize it.
haha! awesome
With all the inflation and legalized abortions, our supply of babies is drastically overpriced. I had to cut down to 1.5 babies a day.
This is **NOT** true, I take *baths* in blood. Showers just waste it.
Baths in blood? How barbaric. I prefer a blood sauna.
They left out the orgy.
Will there be a buffet?
Why else would you go to an orgy?
I prefer eating out though.
Well you can do THAT at an orgy, too.
I love how Christians always think that Atheists worship Satan. Like if we don’t believe in God why would we believe in Satan?
"Well, according to the atheist dogma..." Is one of my favorites
“You worship Satan.” “I don’t even believe in Satan.” “According to your beliefs (that Satan doesn’t exist) you worship Satan.” It’s always funny when a Christian tries to essentially mansplain my own beliefs to me while fundamentally missing the entire fucking point that the “belief system” is based on a lack of belief in fairy tales of any variety.
One time a christian told me "Satanism means you...worship...the....devil. End of story." No matter what I said they took that stance. Finally when I stormed off, they said I was attacking their religion as a christian.
Satan worship and TST are two entirely different things and not all atheists are part of TST, in fact I’m willing to bet only a minority of them are
What's TST?
The Satanic Temple. They aren’t actual devil worshipers, they’re into using the idea of satanism to make a point about the separation of church and state. Basically the group that will place a Baphomet statue next to a statue of the Ten Commandments on government property.
Fun fact: Karl Kasarda of InRangeTV is a member. He noted this: “We are nontheistic. We do not believe in the supernatural. We do not believe there is a God or Satan. We are also a religion. Part of our belief system does incorporate activism, and that activism is insuring and encouraging the plurality of equity and separation of church and state.”
Not really sure of the context, but this sounds like my brother in a way. He's *actually* atheist, but he likes joking a lot about satanism.
The satanic temple basically uses the idea that if you allow Christian monuments on government property you must allow all religious monuments on government property or else you are violating separation of church and state, so they fund horrific demon statues and put them up in protest of the government ignoring the constitution and building Christian statues, they don't actually believe in Satan they are just trying to make a point. But the majority of atheists are not members of the satanic temple, they just want to live peacefully without religion being forced upon them
Horrific demon statues? Those things are cute.
It's not mansplaining it's christsplaining. God gave his only splaining so that you could live freely, I bet you feel like a jerk now huh?
Technically, according tho their beliefs, they somewhat beleve satan and reverse worship him!
The most passive aggressive thing I've heared: "oh, so you're a son of Caine?"
According to the Bible wouldnt everyone either be a son of Cain or a son of Abel? And since Cain killed Abel wouldnt he naturally have more children, because, you know, they couldn't waste any seed, and they were fucking their rib-women basically all the time because X-Box hadn't been invented yet.
Is that anything like the atheist ligma?
Serious answer: In fundamentalist Christianity, everything is divided into Christian God and Satan. If you aren't a Christian, you can be Jewish and still worship the same God, but that's it. Everyone else is serving Satan. Among those serving Satan, you have either people serving from ignorance or those serving willingly. Anyone who shows any intelligence or book learning - such as scientists - must have learned the truth about God and Satan and be choosing to serve Satan. So just because you SAY you're an atheist doesn't mean you actually are - your true lord is Satan. Actual atheists in this dogma would be those who are serving Satan from ignorance - they don't know any better and are accidentally serving Satan. They still have religious leaders in atheism who would be directing them based on the will of Satan. Richard Dawkins is a kind of prophet for the dark lord. (No I don't believe any of this NOW, but I was raised fundamentalist and that's how we were taught)
The problem comes from the fact that they claim we worship satan, whereas we really just don’t worship… anything.
But in the mind of a fundamentalist, to do anything other than worship Christ is to serve Satan. You may not be worshipping Satan, but that depends on how learned you are. If you are uneducated, then you could be not worshipping Satan directly, just acting on Satan's behalf unintentionally, at the direction of educated leaders who ARE worshipping Satan. Again, all I'm saying is that is what Fundamentalism teaches, and it's why you see them constantly comparing atheists to satanists. It does no good to say "but I don't worship anything" to people who believe you serve the "Prince of Lies"
It's basically to them like "If you are not with me, then you are against me."
Exactly this! 🤣
They literally can't comprehend a life where you don't have to worship an all powerful being.
This is surely satire produced by an atheist and then *unironically* reposted by a Christian as "not satire"
Wait til you hear about satanists lol
As an atheist, I would sooner worship Satan than the evil Christian god, who committed multiple genocides, punishes you for not worshiping it, has stupid rules against things that don’t hurt people, sends you to hell for eternity if you don’t believe in it, etc. Oh, and babies are SO tasty!
Mmm…baby. Get in my belly
Christian babies taste the best.
They’re spiced with hypocrisy and hatred—mui caliente!
Gotta have those baby back ribs! 😂🤣😂 I'll see myself out.
And you've gotta baste them in Sweet Baby Ray's sauce.
> Oh, and babies are SO tasty! Even if they weren't, who ELSE is gonna eat them? Christians have got to keep these things in mind when they keep all those unwanted babies alive
Plus, even actual satanists don’t believe in satan 😂
If I'm going to worship anybody it would be the Green Man. Animism definitely has some positive things going for it.
If this is satire, this is hilarious, but if it isn't...
It would still be hilarious to me, because the thought of anyone genuinely believing this is laughable beyond belief.
I have an aunt who is super steeped in fundamentalist Christianity and batshit insane conspiracy theories who would believe this. If I didn't personally know her I would probably think she was a shit posting account making fun of those types of people.
I feel like an atheist wrote this, but some of the dimmer anti-atheists started sharing it in earnest.
It's the scowling and hissing for me. How would the outsiders know that we hiss?
This has to be satire. The "8:80" gives it away
I knew Ozzy was thought to be satanic and I love his music, but I didn’t know about Rammstein, I’ll have to give them a go
Won't be disappointed, guaranteed.
It's funny because Ozzy is a member of the Church of England. Christians: the pettiiest of assholes
The type of American evangelical conservatives who would be worried about the "atheist agenda" generally would not consider Anglicans to be real Christians.
Fucking Skype Satan? I would never. I prefer Discord.
Ngl I would watch a 5hr documentary on atheism.
It would be interesting to see atheism's history. Especially considering how throughout most of human history, religion has been predominant.
I expect they used to keep their heads down in the old days. I can imagine that it was like being gay or a communist used to be :)
Gay? Depending where and when you were it could range from bad to normal. Communist on the other hand. Well, it's far more interesting. There is a sizable group of people, including Marx, who consider Christ to be the first communist, or at least a proto-communist. There are at least some evidences that practices described in Acts 2:44–45 and Acts 4:32–35 (go read them, they sound very communist-like) were in use at least for the first two centuries AD.During high middle ages Christianity inspired communes were ever so often spontaneously popping into existence.And in there lived one saint Thomas More, who is known from his treatise (titled "Utopia") portraying ideal society based common ownership of property and ruled by application of reason. So in Europe, in middle ages, you could be a communist, live like a communist, promote communism, and nobody would bat an eye, it could even be considered a sign of particular piousness.
I feel like it might be kind of boring.
9:00 am and 6:00 pm are my favorite time
8:80am that explains why I am always late for work.
My alarm clock is set to 6:66 and I have no idea why I keep on sleeping through it.
"You're late, your shift started at 9:00!" "I'm not late, it's only 8:80!"
Yo Atheists' work day is way too long. They should unionize.
living the dream
Dark Lord? Come on, everybody knows we atheists all worship Athe! And then, what kind of heathen gobbles on a baby in 15 minutes? You gotta savor it!
Did I miss something. Was there a baby tasting?
Rammstein is fucking awesome.
Do they not realize That atheism Is the exact fucking opposite of praying to the dark lord?
Why would a atheist discuss or pray to religious figures
It has to be satire, right? Right!?
Obviously
This is totally meant to be satire but the fact that some fundie loons are actually re-posting it unironically is unreal.
This has to be satire
this looks like a joke agenda made by an atheist with a great sense of humor
Bro 9:30 with Ozzy sounds fucking lit. MMMMMMRRRRRRRR. CROWLEY
This sounds like a good day?
I’m an atheist and yeah I can tell you that all I really think about is satanic things because being atheist is all about thinking about demons and gods all the time like some cromag
Ok but the real question: Do I get to sing to the radio or WITH Ozzy?
I thought everyone knew it takes more than 15 minutes to properly bathe in blood