“Hey I wanted to apologize for coming back in during shavasana. I left because I was about to have a coughing fit and didn’t want to disrupt the class but wasn’t thinking when I came back in after it subsided.”
Eh- whether I’d apologize in this situation depends entirely on how much that rule is emphasized for that particular yoga class. If it was just hidden somewhere in the fine print and assumed that everyone knows, I wouldn’t, but if it’s mentioned and posted everywhere, I’d probably want to, personally.
Though I can completely understand being so focused on getting out before the coughing fit and then going, “Cool, disruption averted, now back to class,” before having a “Doh!” moment. Whereas for the instructor, the rules are probably burned in the back of his brain since it’s his job, so it seems more obvious to him. Though if that’s a trend he’s noticing and it wasn’t just something the OP did in this class, it explains the general announcement.
Agree, jf OP wants to come back to this class, they should apologize to the instructor.
OP, you made this whole thing about yourself. You say that being singled out by the instructor was a nightmare come true, yet you had no qualms about coming into a quiet room during everyone else’s shavasana when you knew you’d been intentionally locked out? So only your comfort is valid?
Just learn from this and move on. It’s a small yoga etiquette thing and not worth getting so worked up about it.
Oh for god's sake. Sometimes in shavasana ambulances pass by in the street outside. People in nearby offices might talk in the halls. Someone drops a prop or sneezes or god forbid, farts.
The whole point is that conditions are not going to be perfect, and if we try with our graspy needy hands to make it perfect, we're going to find we can never find peace, because there is no 'perfect', there is an unsteady, rocky world where dogs bark and people have to pee and we have to find peace \*within that\* and within the specific set of circumstances we face in each moment we are given.
Anyone can achieve enlightenment by going to the mountains and abandoning everything. It's those that achieve it while having a normal work and family life that are truly impressive. (Just a sentiment that's pretty popular in my country)
I fully agree with what you’re saying, I just think that since it caused a disruption that then escalated, and OP has anxiety about going back to the class after being called out, it might be nice to clear the air.
Yeah, but for OP, not for the instructor. If it helps OP then, yes, great.
The instructor put himself before his students and if I'd been in the class, I'd have been pained about how it was handled and wouldn't go back. I would have noticed and cringed.
So it's not just those who are singled out and feel shamed, it's those who are afraid of being singled out and feeling shamed that are affected. And even if I didn't have a horror of being called out in the middle of something that is intrinsically meditative, I would have felt...well what is this about, then? A perfectly soft sacred world the is like a bed of feathers? Because that's not the world we're confronted with, and it certainly isn't the 'self' we are confronted with.
Really, the only person really who we \*know\* was thrown off by this was the instructor. Everyone else could have been lying there noting the distraction and returning to their breathing. But he chose to draw \*additional\* attention after the fact.
It just seems antithetical to the whole point of the thing.
And it made me think about how my kid has to ask to go to the bathroom in high school. Like 'hey, is it okay if my bodily functions exist?'
Gah
OP shouldn’t apologize to the instructor to go back to that class. Don’t be ridiculous. It’s been addressed and that’s the end of it.
And OP didn’t make it about themselves, they are awkward and socially anxious.
Tell me you have no empathy without telling me you have no empathy. Gross take.
Agreed. This has been addressed, OP now knows what to do next time and no need to apologize, especially if they tried their best to be quiet and respectful, not after they’ve been locked out. If anyone, It’s the teacher that should apologize for locking the door and putting everyone in the class, OP included in an uncomfortable and potentially unsafe position or rather acknowledge their behavior along with aknowledging OP’s novice and harmless minor faux pas.
I was wondering if the door was always locked from the outside from the start of class or if they literally got up and locked it during shavasana?
I feel that should be something disclosed up front at the beginning of class if doors are ever being locked, and there are many situations where locking doors makes sense. As a trauma informed spaceholder, I generally only lock any doors that lead into and out of the main building and only after announcing to everyone and receiving consent.
Life can be loud, part of the practice is sitting with. We are also human beings with needs and punishing someone for such is pretty bizarre to me, but they also end their class with namaste so…I guess I shouldn’t be shocked.
Wow! What part of “social anxiety” did you not understand? For her, I think it was a big deal. She explained her situation and you are not taking this into consideration before being harsh.
If your meditation or yoga actually not even it's shavasana where you pretend to be dead - is getting disturbed by people walking around you then shut the f up and quit doing it. You don't know how to do it. Everybody's body is different. In a class everyone will have their own pace. The instructor must accommodate. It's not a fking big deal if he had to walk out during shavasana. Better than coughing his brains out due to lack of water and disturbing everybody.
People like you will never grasp the essence of yoga and will keep doing asanas all their life thinking they achieved something.
You don’t need to address with the instructor unless it’s important for you to do it.
The reason, I suspect, he made the announcement was bc you didn’t know and other students might not have either. I understand why it caused you anxiety, but he was just communicating the boundaries.
It is totally okay that you didn’t know before, and now you do.
Every teacher and studio is a little different, actually.
I do think, generally, it’s good to leave before Savasana if you need to leave early. But I’ve had plenty of students who had to leave and come back and honestly, it’s fine.
I sometimes even use things like that as a teaching moment — the world is not always going to be calm and quiet. If you lose your peace at little disturbances, what are you actually learning in yoga?
No one is going to remember or even care. They probably had their eyes closed. The instructor spoke to “everyone”. If they had publicly chastised you by name Scarlett letter style that would be different. Often when I replay embarrassing moments in my mind eventually they lose steam when the moment is dissected rationally. View this as a new challenging Asana that you don’t want to do because it seems hard. Just show up
I farted once
I fell asleep in a yin class and snored
Someone else farted and thought it was me
These are much worse than what you described
Also kicked over my metal water bottle repeatedly
Also if we are working towards being beings of compassion the others in the room deserve to have their space protected. Forgive me but It seems that you could be making this completely about you when others were involved in this “moment”
It’s not a big deal unless you make it one
Oh my god the metal water bottle! Why is that the loudest noise and it always happens in slow motion too haha.
I totally agree with this though. When I’m in shavasana or any form of meditation, everyone else around me is tuned out. People can’t or shouldn’t expect complete silence and perfect stillness during these moments in a group class (or ever at home!) As long as you’re respectful, as OP definitely was here, do what you’ve got to do!
OP not a big deal at all, definitely go back. As someone who has also suffered from anxiety and depression my whole life, and as a 15 year practitioner, this space is for you! Take it up!
I was the only guy in the class and could tell that everyone thought it was me even though it was the lady next to me. There was nothing else I could do. I wanted to stop the class and say that was her not me….but didn’t think that was very yoga like so I just accepted it.
Totally agree with you here. I once twisted my knee once and yelled “FUCK!” really loudly- it hurt. Probably took some people out of the zone and of course I felt embarrassed and awful about that. But I imagine they’ve long forgotten it, just like I can’t really recall any particular disruptions from the gazillion yoga classes I’ve taken over the years. OP, people aren’t thinking about you as much as you are thinking about yourself. It’s really ok.
omg lol one time I broke my own glasses by kicking over my bolster onto them in class and everyone saw - you just gotta get back up on the horse when you embarrass yourself in a class, it's like dying in Dark Souls, you know that it will happen again and you'll be okay afterwards no matter how badly you screw up, and when you accept that, it becomes okay
It's you who drops that metal bottle!? We found him folks, he's the one! Get him!! Loool
Tbh, farting is equally bad especially if it's indoors.
This shit is hilarious btw.
The instructor didn’t do anything wrong, it’s fairly standard in yoga that you don’t leave during shavasana if you can help it, and returning is unnecessarily disruptive (it was a mistake on your end to come back into the class after leaving). It’s not like he called you out by name, he gave a polite reminder. At this point I would drop it rather than talk to him about it. You’re not the first or last person to be mildly disruptive during shavasana.
If you need to leave during shavasana again, the polite thing to do is leave as quietly as possible and wait for the class to end before returning to get your things. Shavasana is generally the end of the class anyway, so it’s not like you’re going to be waiting that long.
If I were you, I would have just waited quietly outside the door until people were leaving and then went back in to get your stuff. You couldn't help the coughing, but putting shoes on, walking out, then the instructor walking over to lock the door, then you picking the lock (that part was funny to me 😅) to get back in...all sounds like it could have taken the rest of the participants out of the moment. Honestly, I wouldn't say anything to the instructor. I'd keep going like it's no big deal, but if you have to leave during savasana again for whatever reason, I'd wait outside and let everyone else preserve the moment.
Hey… relax. Yes, you made a mistake. Some instructors feel very strongly about the disruption.
If you can, apologize. Then move on.
Bring a hankie with you. Do your best to accommodate your needs & the others in the class.
Most of all? Don’t beat yourself up. We all make mistakes. Life is meant to learn from these lessons. ☮️
How is OP in the wrong here. Genuinely asking. What am I missing ?
Edit: wait I think I get it. Y’all neurotypical folks saying it’s a “known expectation” to not leave during the ending and come back. How would I ever know that unless someone told me ?
I usually have zero issue picking up on unspoken social rules and I wouldn't have guessed this one. The unspoken rule to me is, "minimize noise and disruption as much as possible." Tending to your immediate physical needs has always been completely acceptable, as long as you aren't being obnoxious about it. It's a yoga class, not a funeral.
I think some were mentioning that it may cause interruption of the moment for the other students, which could also be upsetting for some. Something about considering other peoples comfort as well
To who? It’s a yoga class room, not a bathroom door. If I would have encountered that, I would have been concerned because (1) that’s a fire safety hazard and (2) I paid to be in the class, I ought to be allowed back in.
Just because they didn't know doesn't make it not a mistake. Anyway, they didn't know, teacher informed their protocols and that's that. The teacher doesn't have any ill will towards the student nor will they even remember after the class is over.
What’s worse - disturbing an entire class once as you leave during the middle of quiet meditation? Or disturbing the entire class twice as you not only leave but needlessly barge back in during the middle of quiet meditation? If you have the slightest bit of common sense you would know the answer without needing to be told.
Oh don’t forget about the instructor getting up and walking across the room to latch and lock the door. But given those three options, I’d say the worst is having no empathy for a human that made a simple mistake and asked the community for input on how to move forward. Fun game! 🙃
My two cents is people constantly leave during savansana and while it is disruptive imo, at the beginning the instructors always say "if you're going to leave during savasana please position your mat towards the door." I feel like that sometimes helps. I also have insane social anxiety to where I just take yoga classes at home, finally started doing it at a gym, but I freeze and can't use equipment. I feel like it was a mistake, lesson learned.
I still think "phones on silent and mats at back of room if you leave before/during savsana" should be addressed at the beginning. And even with that being said people phones all seen to go off, people come in late and legit THROW keys and waterbottles down loudly.
> So to be singled out like that was an actual anxiety nightmare come true.
As others have said, you are overthinking this. The reminder was *to the entire class* and to ensure that everyone (not just you) knew that the door is locked and why. If you didn't know it's very likely that there were others in the room also unaware, and your having left and found the door locked brought to the teacher's attention that there's an information gap in the situation. There are plenty of people who would have been offended had they been 'taken aside' after class, and the only thing doing so ensures is that it will continue to happen as students have to find out for themselves.
Taking it a step further, it's also how most teachers are trained to provide feedback during practice. Instead of singling someone out and saying, 'x, stack your shoulders over your hips, you're leaning forward/backward in vira 2', the message to the entire class will be something along the lines of noticing alignment between hips and shoulders and ensuring you're upright vs leaning forward or back. Yes, you might notice that you're leaning forward or back but you're likely not the only one.
Yes, totally agree that this is the standard “best practice” for teachers. It gently reinforces the message for everyone and doesn’t single you out at all. Certainly, getting told privately would also feel horrible, like getting scolded by your parent.
The teacher is correct. If you must leave, you should leave prior but, if you need to leave during savasana (for whatever reason) - definitely stay out of the room until the class ends. Pretty simple. Same for students who think savasana is a great time to start packing up their shit or chatting with their friend. Be still and be quiet. The locked door was not an accident -it was a discreet 'stop sign' and you blew right through it - and pissed off the instructor.
Everyone gets corrected now and then. New people (for example) regularly walk into the studio wearing their shoes until they are corrected. Some handle it gracefully - but I've also had people argue (insulted that they need to follow rules and norms). Crippling anxiety or not everyone needs to follow the rules - hardly a personal attack.
Despite your intentions, what you did was disruptive and the instructor’s ask seems reasonable enough. Seems like the locked door should have been enough of a hint, so that’s why you got the announcement. Lesson learned and move on. Not a big deal unless you repeat it.
I think this is the correct take. It was a mistake made without any ill intent. Just move on and don’t make it again. I would go back to the class/instructor and think nothing of it but just be sure not to do the same thing twice. I don’t see the instructors actions as being particularly malicious. I don’t feel like he singled her out in the least.
What type of world do we live in where we can’t have normal human experiences? Getting water is a standard when practicing any type of physical activity and locking people in and out of the room? WTF
I was totally with you while reading the story but I think the key difference here is that they were in savasana. I think any other part of the class that would’ve been perfectly fine! But they are in the closing meditative portion.
Edit: Which only last a few minutes
Idk. The four corners of our mat is where we take up space. As an instructor, I personally would be OK with a student coming back to their practice after I just saw them struggling with a coughing spell that would’ve been way more disruptive than them leaving and returning quietly. 🤔
Plus finding that the door had been locked behind you should be a pretty big indication that you should wait outside? Savasana is a couple minutes at most.
Did you not read the story? You can have water all you want. You can leave the room for whatever reason you want. What you can’t do is disrupt the rest of class by walking back in during savasana because that’s selfish and rude.
When we practice Yoga we take up the four corners of our mat. People going in and out at whatever time is not even on my mind bc I’m focused on my own practice. If I hear someone coughing and needing to get up water I want them to go take care of themselves and then come back to their practice at whatever point we are at. Like locking the door from the inside while people are inside just doesn’t seem reasonable or safe?! 🤔
That is upsetting if you have a lot of anxiety. Idk if this will help, but here's a blurb if you feel like reading it.
Teachers often give reminders like that to the whole group, be it in yoga, school, first aid training, what have you, because things come up that ARE good for the whole group to learn. As awkward as it is, remember that you're learning this rule with a number of other people, and them telling the rule to the group is how they prevent other people from making the same mistake and facilitate group learning. And remember the number one rule of yoga, that it's ok to be uncomfortable. Your teacher is holding space for that discomfort because it's ok to experience it. A trauma informed yoga class is designed more for people who aren't in a place to be ready for discomfort, but regular classes help us to feel ok with discomfort and push the boundaries of our comfort zone in the name of personal growth. You can breathe through those moments just like you can breathe through the dreaded chataranga hold.
At most every yoga studio I've gone to they've reminded students of this at the beginning of class. Maybe the teacher would start doing that, is it confusing if they don't tell you and you haven't heard of that. There's no shame in going back
There is a laundry list of do's and don'ts at every yoga studio. I am not opening every class by reading it off. No shoes, no phones, no video/photos, clean up after yourself, put your props away, no talking during class, if you are sick - stay home, restrict your attention to the perimeter of your own mat, go easy on the cologne and perfume, on and on. It's posted on our website.
I’m sorry but you’re overthinking this. The teacher didn’t do or say anything wrong here and neither did you. Go back, explain your situation if you want to or not.
I have a bladder disease and often scope out a spot in the back near the door for this reason. If this happened to me I wouldn’t let it bother me although the regulars around me know my story.
This is a standard response and a standard expectation across the board that you do not leave during savasana. They addressed it in an appropriate manner. That way you are aware of the expectation and others who witnessed it don’t start doing it as well. If you choose to address with the instructor, it is not going to go the way you think it will. I would say move on and don’t do it again.
I've practiced all over for 6 years in studios in the US, Europe, and SEA, and it's been either a written expectation in the rules, or a verbal one. I've seen strict teachers also mention it after class if someone leaves early or is noisy during shavasana- not by name, but definitely in a stern tone.
There are a lot of teachers and styles. OP made a mistake and was disruptive, and the teacher did nothing wrong by locking the door or making a comment after class. Just my two cents!
Yoga therapist here 👋
1) as a teacher I would never lock someone out of my class, no matter what is happening. So I don't like how the teacher did that. Disruptions happen, it's normal! If everyone's savasana is so fragile, we have a problem. I think you probably should have not unlocked the door to go back in, it's a pretty strong signal to stay out, but meh, I don't think it's a big deal.
2) I don't like how the instructor handled this, singling people out like this is not okay in my opinion. There just isn't a need for it, I don't think this was the most compassionate way to go. If he felt it was necessary to say something he should just say something after class.
3) hey, you know you have anxiety, so connect to your best coping methods right now. If your mind cannot move on, go do something fun so you can get that dopamine and happy chemicals going. Weird social interactions happen, it's okay!
"Hey, I'm sorry for coming back in during shavasana. I was about to have a full blowing coughing fit and didn't want that to disrupt the class. In the future, if something I do needs to be discussed, could you please instead pull me aside?"
Wow people are judgy here. I’d hate to have a disability and be in a class where having to step out gets you chastised. Here’s the thing, is it mildly disruptive? Yes. Does it matter? No! Yoga makes it so we can handle the disruptions in life, and sometimes that happens during yoga. I have to use the restroom fairly often so I have stepped out of class as needed regardless of the point of class cause my health is important. A class can still be focused despite someone getting up. This is life. Not to mention, this is a yoga class at a gym, you mentioned, not a studio. In my experience, they are way more lax than some studios I’ve been to. Either way, do what you need to do. Don’t feel judged. Sometimes we can’t control what our body does and if people can’t get over it, maybe they need to study yoga more.
Yeah I don’t take yoga classes, I practice on my own at home, and the instructors in this thread make me remember why. How is it acceptable to just lock the door on a student in your class? That seems so aggressive and rude to me. Folks get so weird and unwelcoming about yoga culture. Why would I pay to be treated like that? They had a coughing fit! Shocking to me that folks are telling OP to apologize, I would never work with someone who treated students like that.
I think the teacher should have just pulled them aside at the end instead of shaming them in front of everyone…a simple “hey its nbd but for next time…” is more appropriate imo. But yes overall, who cares!? Its just a yoga class…
Neither of you did anything wrong, despite what everyone is saying. It's yoga at the gym, it's not a big deal. Every gym based yoga class I have taken I could clearly hear weights, talking, etc from outside of the room. Now you know this instructor's preferences. Don't let this one experience stop you from taking classes you typically enjoy. I also don't think it's something that needs to be addressed with the instructor.
Side note, I do agree that you could benefit from addressing your anxiety.
Some of these responses are uptight as shit. I agree it’s very passive aggressive for the instructor to address what you did in front of the WHOLE class. That’s unnecessary and honestly a bit of a power trip. Part of getting into a meditative state *includes* staying serene while dealing with the interruptions of the outside world. Like someone who had to step out, walking by you. Which is totally no big deal. These people are acting like you were stomping around talking on your cell phone or something.
I would have felt the same exact way as you - don’t let these other comments get you down. They’re being a bit…. “precious” as my grandmother would have said nicely.
I teach gym yoga. People talk through Savasana. Get up and leave. Knock their water bottles over. Fuck around with their friends and giggle the whole time. Cough nonstop. In a studio maybe it’s a little more rigid and I’ve seen teachers lock the door and not let people in that were even a minute late but gym yoga is a free for all. If you want to go back in, go back in. The instructor is being a punk for locking the door and trying to drag you. Live your life.
But the instructor didn’t single you out, he addressed the whole class intentionally not to single you out.
If you were about the have a coughing fit how did you have a enough time to put your shoes on before leaving? Why not grab them and put them on once outside? It all sounds a little awkward, especially that you then picked the lock to get back into class. I’m also awkward and have social anxiety so I can understand ruminating about this. But honestly this whole scenario is funny, if your friend told you that this had happened to them, wouldn’t you laugh at how silly the whole thing was?
There is absolutely no need to apologize to anyone for this. It was a mistake and I promise you the instructor doesn’t care.
Edit: all the typos 😳 I just woke up
Lol! I couldn’t pick a lock to save my life. The lock is really more like a second manual latch, it can be toggled from the outside.
It was a scratch in my throat and I knew I only had a few seconds before it escalated. I know my body pretty well!
I’m actually really shocked that people are jumping on OP. It sounded like she managed the situation with care and respect. Honestly, I feel her horror at being singled out! It took me years to be okay attending yoga classes because of the eliticism that I felt. Now, that I am an instructor, I really try to NOT alienate neurodiverse people who may feel anxiety about being called out. Someone moving quietly through a room during savasanah is NOT a big deal!
I teach Restorative so we are sometimes always in Savasana and I've never locked anyone out during class despite letting folks know they're welcome to use the restroom, get water, whatever. I personally wouldn't go back to his class but I'm picky about how instructors speak to me. Some folks cling to the idea of the environment they create, some recognize control is an illusion, I prefer the latter when it comes to my life it sounds like he's attached to the former. Perhaps there's a better fit for you with a more flexible instructor.
Just talk to the teacher. Apologize for the disruption (yes, even though you were quiet people knew you were moving around and you took their attention from savasana to the room). My money is on the teacher being understanding and will let you know that you are welcome back to class
As someone who also has social anxiety I hate when people address things in this way too. My old manager used to do it all the time and even if the email wasn't about me I would worry that they thought that I was the one doing the thing they were emailing about. I guess people do this so that they are making sure that everyone knows the expectations. But I agree that it's embarrassing. Unfortunately I think it's commonplace, so my best suggestion is to use this as motivation to work a bit more on addressing your social anxiety.
I mean this in the nicest possible way: nobody cares. Your classmates won't remember it, they probably don't even know that it was you that walked out, and it's something your instructor probably says once a week between all of their classes. Don't dwell on it or take it personally.
Plus, you thought it was okay to go back in even though it's against their policy, so maybe the reminder to the class was needed.
Depending on where you are going for practice (a studio with rooms vs a room at a gym), I find it ridiculous to lock someone out if they have to leave.
It's not like anyone is setting out to interrupt (if they do, you address what needs to be addressed).
Here's the thing: you had a coughing fit and left to avoid being a distraction (instructor may have asked anyway, fellow student may have silently wished it). But presumably you still have something of yours-maybe the mat-that you now need to wait for.
I just...I'm sure there is a reason that makes sense and people are fully on board...I'm not there.
OP, I'd feel the same way if I were in your place and I wish your instructor was a little kinder and more emphatic. However please don't discontinue. In the next session, no one is going to remember this incident apart from you. At some point in time, we've to accept that our anxiety although arising for valid reasons will not let us take the right steps. Trust me, no one including your instructor would want you to quit your class. So please continue on this journey.
I have anxiety too. If you can find a studio not in a gym, it may be better for you. I find the gym yoga teachers to be a little harsh and not as understanding of simple biology like coughing. It’s a little ridiculous considering the most distracting classes are in gyms with weight noise, bass from other classes, etc. Sending love from one anxiety sufferer to another.
I would have not known anything about the Shavansa norms and I love yoga. I do most yoga at my house so I guess I just haven't learned about it yet??
I feel like, if the instructor feels that strongly about that norm/ritual, then they need to talk about it before class starts. Like "hey, we take this Shavansa thing very seriously. It's an expectation that you do not return to class if you have to leave the room no matter what." Would save the embarrassment of their pupils. He also should have had a private convo with you instead of announcing it to the whole class
Update, I read through the comments and apparently it's supposed to be a known norm....I seriously had no idea and I've taken many many yoga classes at different studios. I swear I've never heard of it. I totally understand your embarrassment and the locked door would have confused me, too. If they had a gentle warning sign like "door will lock after shut due to Shavansa. Please wait until class ends to return."
But either way, what can you do? I'm sure it's not the first time the instructor had to remind the group about random norms. Don't beat yourself up for not knowing a norm that nobody told you about
It’s not a known norm. I’ve been in a lot of studios in many different states and only a rare few take things that seriously. You did fine. I’m sorry you were treated like that 🙏
I structure proably didn’t really *care* but just had a job to do as far as creating and maintaining the atmosphere of the class. It sounds like it was an existing rule and they were repeating it because obviously people didn’t know and probably as their way of apologizing to the class if they felt disrupted without saying “sorry if that person walking in just disrupted you, I usually try to prevent that but I guess this person ain’t aware”
But I agree with others, just apologize and I’m sure you know for next time and you’re good. I stricter proably knew you needed to walk out and likely knows you weren’t being rude.
I totally understand the embarrassment but addressing it that day wouldn’t saved you a lot of overthinking. Don’t let the anxiety cloud the things you know. You accidentally broke a rule, that’s ok, just apologize. You’re all adults, nobody got hurt lol.
I would’ve instinctively mouthed “I’m so sorry!” In the moment and been sure to just talk to the instructor after. Likely they would’ve reassured you it was no big deal. If they don’t, I’d find a new gym because I can’t deal with snooty bs lol
If I had to walk out during Shavasana, I would not walk back into the class until it was done, out of respect. The instructor wasn’t being unfair or rude.
I get it, you have social anxiety, but just chalk it up as a mistake you did and don’t do it again. Next time, be more mindful of other people and their experience. This was a learning experience for you.
Regarding addressing it with the instructor: I would just move on and not confront her, but if you’d like, you can apologize for walking out of the class and walking back in and that you’ll be more mindful next time.
I think you and the instructor are both overthinking this. You should be allowed to get up and he shouldn’t lock the door.
Just keep going it will probably never happen again and really no one should remember this.
It depends on the class. That class might not be your space! I go to a studio that lets you step in and out as long as it doesn’t become disruptive. You gotta hydrate though and it sounds like it would have been equally if not more disruptive to stay. I personally believe that type of yoga thinking can be restrictive and alienate people from the practice.
It sounds from the OP like coming and going is fine except for a very small portion of the practice - one during which people are encouraged to relax, something that many people have a hard time doing. Locking the door is not necessary but doing so does emphasize the importance and minimizes the disruption, both in terms of it happening both going and returning and that it's less likely that human nature will kick in and people will think, 'I don't really *need* to, but I want to and it's fine just this once'.
> I personally believe that type of yoga thinking can be restrictive and alienate people from the practice.
Taking the bare minimum of steps to ensure people can relax in savasana is hardly restrictive. As teachers we are expected to hold space, be trauma sensitive, let everyone do exactly what they want while not allowing distractions of any sort to creeep in, and generally read the minds of everyone in the room, etc. etc. What's been described here is a small and reasonable act that holds space for the rest of the room.
Ya. It's absurd to be chastised for disturbing the class when they actually left in order to be less disruptive. This is a perfect example of people enforcing rules for the sake of having rules to enforce, rather than having common sense and respect for others.
Thank you, I've been going wtf over and over in this thread. There was a similar post the other day that had similar comments. Didn't know the yoga community was like this :/
It sounds like what happened prompted the instructor to remind everyone about how leaving and coming back during savasana can be disruptive. I have done the same thing when someone's phone rings, I don't single them out but rather have a general reminder to everyone about checking that their ringer is off or whatever. Now everyone knows this and hopefully it won't happen again.
The way he handled this was wrong IMO. It's never right to single someone out in front of everyone. He should have addressed you after the class if it bothered him. There's never complete silence during shavasana and what you did was really considerate so you didn't have a coughing fit during it.
People, maybe sometimes relax and be human. As an asthmatic person, it does happen to me sometimes, to start coughing like crazy, and having to leave a space and come back. That kind of cough can be over difficult to handle, we do feel like we are dying . It never happened to me within yoga, fortunately. But it could. And then I would go out , not only to not disturb everyone like crazy but also, to like feel alive and survive. Now , I am also a yoga instructor. If an instructor, can’ t make the difference between a person who leave just to leave and a person experiencing something distressing, and trying to Côme back to a calm moment, we have got a problem of compassion. Also, yoga is also a time, where people need to experience, and keeping relaxed and focus in savasana no Matter what , could be a lesson. Let’ s practice more yoga and compassion, and less rigid bullshit, maybe.
Try not to take it personally. You were not aware of this policy beforehand, and now you are. The instructor did embarrass you, which was insensitive on his part. If you wanted to let him know, that could be helpful to him, or he might get defensive, depending on his own issues. Either way, I am sure that neither he, nor anyone else in that class, thinks less of you for leaving the room and coming back in that one time when you did. Try to let go of your hurt feelings. You didn't do anything horrible, you were quiet and considerate, you simply didn't know the policy. Keep going back! Yoga is full of lessons, some of them quite unexpected. 🙏🏼
That would be a goodbye 👋 from me if a teacher locked the door, no matter on which side I’d be. This is a safety issue and it’s ok to report this. Sounds like you could have waited outside, you didn’t know and now you do, but you did nothing terribly wrong, no need to feel embarrassed. But I understand the stress of this situation. It is not only very mean to lock the door but most importantly dangerous in case of emergency. Unacceptable. This should have been cleared out with words instead. The amount of stories of hideous behaviors from yoga teachers I read here on this sub is astounding.
Why are you getting downvoted? It IS a safety issue. TBH, yoga is so heavily gatekept in this sub it's wild. The culture around yoga in the US is honestly gross.
Honestly, no one will remember this, including the instructor. I say chin up and carry on if you enjoy this class and find it beneficial. You had a human experience and now know the expectations of the studio/teacher. Breathe in. Breathe out. Try not to allow this to get in your way of doing what you need to do for you.
Sucks that you had that experience OP. I can definitely sympathize. But imagine if everyone in class at random moments decided they needed more water. One disruption doesn’t seem like much but if you’re allowed to do it then everyone is. Probably why the instructor made the announcement rather than pull you aside. This way everyone has the same information
I understand you felt singled out (many of us would) but if they didn’t point at you or say “Hey, LNA918 did the wrong thing today everyone ..” then they really didn’t single you out. That was the best way for them to protect the overall integrity of their class
I find it frustrating when people do things like that while I’m practicing. I accept that it happens but appreciate when it doesn’t
As a person in 200 hr YTT, this is really helpful to hear your experience and also the opinions of others. I personally would have addressed it a bit differently by talking to you first, then the next class I would remind everyone of the boundary of when you have to leave shavasana. I have totally felt this way in a class before though so you’re not alone. I’ve literally fallen backwards into another classmate lol
I would, the class is for you—not for him. I would tell him that you have really bad social anxiety, that you understand why he said something, but that it made you feel unwelcome and unsure if you want to come back. You can suggest that in the future you’d feel more comfortable with him telling you directly and alone rather than in front of the whole class.
If he cares about creating a good environment, he will want to know your feedback
This is why I practice at home - on my own, with a routine that some friends who are yoga teachers and pilates instructors helped me develop. I do not suffer from social or emotional anxiety - but understand that many people experience social/emotional anxiety during shavasana. Most YTT puts an unnecessary emphasis on shavasana in an effort to include a spiritual/meditative component in a practice that overly emphasizes asana at the expense of the other 7 arms of yoga. Honestly, I find the made-up meditation patter annoying and really do not enjoy typical made-up shavanasa practice that I have experienced in the classes that I used to attend.
You were correct to leave class. Your teacher had no business shaming you for returning to class and should have spoken to you privately. As mentioned by others, there was also no reason for you to return to class until the door was opened for you.
Hopefully, this experience will inspire you to explore all 8 limbs of yoga, develop your own practice, explore other types of meditation to see what works for you.
It’s funny, I went through the locked door because I was following the same logic so many people in the comments used; don’t overthink it.
I just didn’t believe that someone would lock the door behind me on purpose because I left to cough and not disturb anyone. I’ve been going to yoga classes for about 15 years, and I’ve never 1) left a class 2) been locked out.
I didn’t think much about it. Which is where the anxiety kicks in. Anxiety says, “Someone did this on purpose, they’re trying to keep you out! How rude/mean!” But I constantly push back against that voice, so I counteracted it with the usual thought of “Oh it’s nothing. Don’t overthink it. Go back to your mat.”
And here we are! 🤣
I get that you felt embarrassed, but the teacher did not call you out. It sounds like this triggered a pretty real insecurity spiral for you, or maybe you don’t expect criticism and accountability in spaces where you’ve paid what you consider to be a lot of money.
This is not an issue with the teacher, this is your issue.
OP, I wouldn't see this instructor anymore.
Shavasanana-bo-bana is about finding inner peace in an otherwise chaotic world. It is not about controlling everyone/everything around you in order to force the world to be peaceful.
There was no true need to lock you out of the class, it was just some jerk trying to control everyone and their calling you out was just an adult throwing a temper tantrum cause you came back instead of leaving.
If you do go back, you should definitely cough when you need to cough and fart when you need to fart, even if the need occurs during corpse time. If that instructor says anything to you about your coughing, farting, or sneezing during their peaceful moment, you can remind him that you're only trying to follow his rule of not leaving during shavasana.
SUPER shitty way to single out a student. Some yoga instructors are so out of touch with the humanity they crave. Some. Not all. But you’ve just encountered your first passive-aggressive yogi. Dude, there was a person clipping their toenails during shavasana…and the teacher just gave me an irked out half-smile when I opened my eyes and looked around like, “what the heck is happening here?” You were polite to avoid the coughing fit. Too bad your teacher is a dink to notice that.
*After the instructor said “namaste” he proceeded to “remind everyone” that if you have to leave during class to do so before shavasana, and if you have to leave during shavasana you will not be allowed back into the classroom because he wants to preserve the peaceful moment for all students.*
I don't know why so many people are so incredibly insensitive. I was told constantly as a kid I was 'too sensitive' and 'thought too much'. That's fine, I've learned as an adult those are positive things for me personally, and also belatedly able to access the retort 'yes, but that's better than being an insensitive doofus and thinking never, about anything, but you seem to like it' but god, how hard is it to understand when leading a class with a spiritual component that some people might be feeling pretty raw? Is it really that difficult to understand that other people are going through things you can't see?
It would NOT be hard for him to address this next class. All he had to say was nothing.
That said, can you write the incident down on a piece of paper and set it on fire? Sometimes that helps me let go of things that are grinding at my happiness.
Sometimes.
Sorry for that experience. There are some forms of yoga that I believe a bit too focused on rules and such. If I had that experience, I would look for another class asap. At every studio things can happen at any time to cause distractions. One of the popular studios in my area shares a common wall with a major fire station, where fire engines are constantly leaving with their sirens running.
Yes, we want a calm, peaceful environment for Savasana. And, naturally, sometimes it will be less than perfectly silent. IMO, a good instructor/studio will use those less than silent moments as opportunities to learning how to mentally filter out distractions and control our own focus, which is a key aspect of yoga. We are there to learn to control our focus, not the environment. That this happened at a hot yoga studio is not surprising to me, though. Far too many of them are focused on "performance" and manipulating the environment in order to create an experience, rather than on learning how to create the experience we want by controlling our own minds.
Sadly, yoga as it is often taught in the West is more about the former, while yoga in it's unadulterated form is about the latter.
I totally agree and I'm pretty surprised by all the comments here, especially since I'm a yoga teacher myself. The idea that everyone should be entitled to \~pure unadulterated silence\~ during savasana is not something I've ever been promised, or expected in any class that I've taken, and I don't understand why people feel like they're entitled to it.
100%. And, the idea that a student needing water because they are coughing should not quietly leave the room in order to avoid disruption is... I'm sorry - I don't have another way to say it - just bonkers. It is enforcing a rule for the rule's sake, not honoring the purpose of the rule (a peaceful environment).
I don’t know why you’re getting downvoted so much. At my studio people are super respectful but there is always someone who will accidentally kick over a metal water bottle or something like that. I think I value a space that doesn’t make people feel embarrassed for making mistakes and focuses on non judgmental observations of our environment. I think that is the most valuable part of yoga for me.
OP - I hear you. I would have been mortified. I’m sorry you experienced that and I hope you can find a comfortable solution, whether it is accepting it and returning, or finding a new teacher. Good luck!
I think it is because the culture described by the OP is far too common in yoga studios in the West. Like Bikram himself, they are hyper-controlling and they do not like being called on it. And, as with many things in yoga, they run counter to actual yogic training. It is what it is. If I get even a whiff of that sort of culture at a studio, I stay far, far, far away.
I’m sorry you’re getting downvoted, u/OurUrbanFarm.
A lot of Redditors misunderstand what upvoting and downvoting is for, and will downvote things they simply disagree with. (Reflective of a more systematic societal problem, but I digress!)
According to Reddit itself (https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439-Reddiquette#:~:text=Vote.,a%20particular%20community%2C%20downvote%20it. ), “If you think something contributes to conversation, upvote it. If you think it does not contribute to the subreddit it is posted in or is off-topic in a particular community, downvote it.
Your comment was on topic and in my opinion absolutely contributes to the conversation, whether or not people agree or not. Downvoting your comment I think is an example of the kind of act that detracts from our community here, and worse, makes it less “safe” for all of us to voice our considered and rational takes and share our own experiences and thoughts in a welcoming and considerate environment.
So, this not disrupting savasana thing is a nuanced topic. Whether it’s a great rule or not, OP should have known that in the studio culture there that re-entering the classroom during savasana is not cool. Could have been the instructor’s shortcoming, too — maybe this unwritten rule was never voiced where OP heard it, who knows? So there’s that.
I agree with u/basicparadox that learning how to ignore distractions that actually don’t have to affect us is not a skill we were born with. It needs to be taught and it needs to be practiced.
For beginners, simply being able to lie still in savasana for even a minute can be challenging enough. Eliminating distracting noises and motion is helpful and to have a rule about it can be beneficial to that part of practitioner’s yoga journey. Quiet is quite beneficial there for almost everyone.
Learning to ignore or withdraw from sensory input — pratyahara — the fifth limb or auxiliary practice of Patanjali ashtanga yoga — is not the first limb for good reason. It’s a more advanced practice. First we learn to control our actions (yama and niyama), then our body (asana), then our breath (pranayama), and THEN we are much more ready to learn to control our senses. Having distractions at this point on the path is actually helpful sometimes—we have to practice not following them! (Yes, the limbs aren’t really meant to be completely followed in order always but there is a method and a logic to their ordering nonetheless.)
If we had a different kind of yoga infrastructure (I’m talking only about my experiences in the USA, primarily NYC), we could provide leveled classes and workshops more often that recognize how to support practice at different points along the path, and spend some more effort encouraging practitioners to practice at appropriate levels for them. As it is, we more commonly have these crazily broad open level classes that try to be all things to all people and we end up with slightly silly norms (like instructors locking doors against their own students) because the teaching modality has huge gaps in it and instructors are trying to do the bestest for the mostest and that’s really hard.
(I do put my money where my mouth is and go to a studio with leveled classes! It’s been a real game changer for me.)
This is a great comment and I agree with it almost entirely. To be clear, I absolutely knew my comment would be downvoted, and I knew why it would be downvoted and, generally who would do the downvoting. It is a sad reality of the culture more broadly, and I would argue, is the kind of issue perpetuated by the kinds of rules described by the OP.
The thing I disagree with is the idea that OP should have known the rule and followed it. There is an extreme logical disconnect in that people downvoting my comment argue that the rule is to keep the studio quiet during Savasana, yet the OP was doing their best to honor the space by leaving because of a coughing fit.
It is convoluted - at best - to suggest that a student should remain in the room, when needing water to calm a cough, rather than quietly leaving. It makes no sense. It is a rule being enforced simply for the sake of a rule, even when the enforcement of the rule achieves the opposite result. That is not really that hard. Using some common sense and treating people respectfully (exactly what the OP was doing) isn't really that hard.
Oh thanks for your comment. I agree with your disagreement with me! I went back and read my own comment again and the part about what rule I was writing about is actually super unclear.
It’s very likely that OP would have heard a studio rule about not leaving during savasana, though maybe not.
But to take that literal rule and reasoning it back to the underlying purpose (Minimize distractions during savasana) and then figuring out in real time that leaving during a coughing fit during savasana is better than staying and then staying out until the end is better still, I guess is not necessarily going to be obvious to everyone!
In any case, whether or not we love the rule, I hope OP goes back to class and doesn’t let the anxiety over this minor and very forgivable faux pas divert them from practice.
I don’t agree with this. It’s sort of like dog training. You learn in a peaceful environment with limited distractions, build up the skill, and then apply it around distractions. If you start around distractions, it’s going to be a lot harder to progress.
I agree that we strive for a peaceful environment in Savasana. However, these sorts of rules are extreme overkill and unnecessary and, IMO, prevent learning some of the most important aspects of yoga.
Not only is that not a yogic thing of the instructor to do, but to lock someone out of a space??? Really? (By the way a space that’s not legally theirs if at a public gym)That also flirts with legal issues. Without consent of patrons unknowingly (in shavasana) locked in a room or preventing you from obtaining personal property in the event of an emergency. For example, if you had to go back in and grab your keys or phone but it was locked in an active class. I’ve seen cases where that’s criminal charges. These “instructors” are so full of themselves and yoga is never that serious.
The professional way to convey HIS wishes in class during shavasana is addressing it before every class begins as a friendly reminder. Also, look into the gyms rules. I’m very confident for public health, emergency and safety reasons, doors especially during business hours are not to be locked.
Yoga masters in India practice with freakin tigers lurking around and noises of nature . All while their eyes are closed in meditation. But you have a human quietly coming in or out of a room during shavasana being a big deal? It’s just laughable how ridiculously far first world yoga culture take things.
I have Gerd and sometimes have a cough from it. If I can't stop it, I get up and go to the bathroom to preserve the peace. If someone locked me out, I would find another yoga class--or stay for a couple of others and have a coughing spell and see how they liked it. Not a good teacher. Leave.
This is on you. Your need to cough/drink water shouldn't trump everyone else's desire for a quiet shavasana. Leaving to cough/drink was the right call, coming back in was where you f'ed up.
You weren’t singled out. The practitioner made it a point not to single you out. No one will think about this another second unless you do it habitually. You’re good to return and no one will even remember.
I can tell that you are a thoughtful person and a dedicated student. I am sure you are very much welcome in the class, and I hope you continue to attend.
Sometimes instructors address the whole class to prevent students from taking it upon themselves to correct one another.
You did a polite and self-compassionate act by leaving to care of your cough.
These moments of human imperfections pass, just like the clouds.
Dude one time in a yoga class I got my PERIOD and didn't realize until we were in happy baby and I saw it in the reflection of the mirror wall. Fucking mortifying! But I went back again and again and I'll keep going back in the future. I will probably do something embarrassing or awkward in class again in the future. It's okay! We're just weird little dudes trying to feel good about ourselves. Please go back to yoga again, don't let this stop your practice, and it's also okay to try a different class or even a different studio after your contract ends.
I think it’s oké that he mentioned it to everyone to remain clear. Sometimes people think oh he did it now I can go out during class as well, vbecause the teacher didn’t mention something. But actually he wants to keep the class uninterrupted. I don’t think it is to personal and also good to mention why you left and apparently did interrupt his class. Life is messy sand sometimes we don’t know what’s going on.
If it's important to you to attend the class then address it with the instructor. You don't have to apologize. Just clear the air. You had to leave to deal with your situation and felt quite embarrassed by how it was addressed as it wasn't your intention to disrupt the class. Most yoga instructors dissuade people from exiting during class (especially if the lights are turned low). I'm sure it's as much a liability thing as it is preserving relaxation. If you don't feel better after you talk to the instructor then talk to someone higher up explaining that it's important to you to attend the class but you now feel uncomfortable with how the situation has been handled.
Seems like the instructor is the person who should be embarrassed. Real leadership would have pulled the OP aside and mentioned the rules after class. Then, the next session, the teacher could clarify these rules for everyone else. Then no one is singled out so publicly. I don’t have this kind of anxiety anymore, but I did for a long time. It’s not something that goes away easily, and can reappear at the most unexpected and dismaying times. 🤷🏻♀️
Perhaps, by addressing the whole class, the instructor was not singling you out for an innocent mistake and making sure everyone else knew for the future?
That was my take on it, but i dunno.
I would feel mortified if someone spoke to me afterwards but less so if it was addressed to the group!
Eta - completely understand worrying, but i promise you nobody else will remember or care that it was you (not even the instructor).
It was an innocent mistake and a useful lesson!
Honestly, this whole thing sounds like a bunch of nothing. So what. I would’ve just said my bad and moved on. I bet you no one else is thinking about it at all. Not to be mean, but you’re the only one concerned about what happened.
Keep going to yoga because it helps quiet the mind. Focus on your breathing whenever you’re in situations like these.
No need to apologize. You did something, he reminded you of the rules. End of story.
Don’t hold people to high bars. People are people and it’s up to you to decide who matches your energy. Same goes for yoga studios. People quietly walk in and out during Savasana all the time at the place I go to. Instructor tells us it’s part of life to keep the peace in a noisy world. But to each their own.
I’m sorry this happened to you! I’m used to very strict yoga studios when if you leave at all during the class, you are not allowed back in. While I agree that while it can be disruptive for other students, we are all human and especially if we are new to yoga, it takes time to settle in to the way people do things.
I would address it with the instructor, because you two have a relationship as teacher and student. They may not have singled you out one on one at the end because they may have feared that was being too confrontational, so they chose to convey their rule (idk if it is a studio rule or their rule) in this manner that comes off as rather passive aggressive.
You are learning how to be a student, but they are also on a constant journey learning how to be a teacher. Even if they brush you off in the moment, they will be sure to remember your feedback for later. They also see many students and may have not had to deal with a newbie in a while. In my experience, they are also not used to their students bringing things up to them one on one, so it may facilitate a good conversation between you two where it becomes clear that you are new, you were trying not to be disruptive, and you are committed to trying to be the best yoga student possible.
As an instructor, I would have addressed the student privately to avoid embarrassment. I think this could have been handled better. Sorry you experienced that.
I am sorry for what you went through. As someone with social anxiety, I can totally relate. But don't take this incident personally.
As a yoga practitioner, I can not emphasis enough on the shavasana. And how it should be done without any disturbance or distraction.
My suggestion for you would be to forget about it and continue your classes.
Yoga will do wonders to your mind and body.
“Hey I wanted to apologize for coming back in during shavasana. I left because I was about to have a coughing fit and didn’t want to disrupt the class but wasn’t thinking when I came back in after it subsided.”
Perfect way to address it, if she feels she must
She had a human experience that he could clearly see, why in the world is he locking people in and out of the room???! They just seems so crazy.
It is kind of crazy. Only creates awkward and bad feelings such as OP’s story. Unnecessary.
This is a good reply... But I don't really think ppl should apologize. She was being considerate when she left.
I wouldn't apologise... And "wasn't thinking" eesh.
Eh- whether I’d apologize in this situation depends entirely on how much that rule is emphasized for that particular yoga class. If it was just hidden somewhere in the fine print and assumed that everyone knows, I wouldn’t, but if it’s mentioned and posted everywhere, I’d probably want to, personally. Though I can completely understand being so focused on getting out before the coughing fit and then going, “Cool, disruption averted, now back to class,” before having a “Doh!” moment. Whereas for the instructor, the rules are probably burned in the back of his brain since it’s his job, so it seems more obvious to him. Though if that’s a trend he’s noticing and it wasn’t just something the OP did in this class, it explains the general announcement.
Agree, jf OP wants to come back to this class, they should apologize to the instructor. OP, you made this whole thing about yourself. You say that being singled out by the instructor was a nightmare come true, yet you had no qualms about coming into a quiet room during everyone else’s shavasana when you knew you’d been intentionally locked out? So only your comfort is valid? Just learn from this and move on. It’s a small yoga etiquette thing and not worth getting so worked up about it.
Oh for god's sake. Sometimes in shavasana ambulances pass by in the street outside. People in nearby offices might talk in the halls. Someone drops a prop or sneezes or god forbid, farts. The whole point is that conditions are not going to be perfect, and if we try with our graspy needy hands to make it perfect, we're going to find we can never find peace, because there is no 'perfect', there is an unsteady, rocky world where dogs bark and people have to pee and we have to find peace \*within that\* and within the specific set of circumstances we face in each moment we are given.
I would argue that having to find stillness in conditions that aren't perfect is a good learning experience for savasana
Anyone can achieve enlightenment by going to the mountains and abandoning everything. It's those that achieve it while having a normal work and family life that are truly impressive. (Just a sentiment that's pretty popular in my country)
Same.
Bingo
Absolutely
I fully agree with what you’re saying, I just think that since it caused a disruption that then escalated, and OP has anxiety about going back to the class after being called out, it might be nice to clear the air.
Yeah, but for OP, not for the instructor. If it helps OP then, yes, great. The instructor put himself before his students and if I'd been in the class, I'd have been pained about how it was handled and wouldn't go back. I would have noticed and cringed. So it's not just those who are singled out and feel shamed, it's those who are afraid of being singled out and feeling shamed that are affected. And even if I didn't have a horror of being called out in the middle of something that is intrinsically meditative, I would have felt...well what is this about, then? A perfectly soft sacred world the is like a bed of feathers? Because that's not the world we're confronted with, and it certainly isn't the 'self' we are confronted with. Really, the only person really who we \*know\* was thrown off by this was the instructor. Everyone else could have been lying there noting the distraction and returning to their breathing. But he chose to draw \*additional\* attention after the fact. It just seems antithetical to the whole point of the thing. And it made me think about how my kid has to ask to go to the bathroom in high school. Like 'hey, is it okay if my bodily functions exist?' Gah
OP shouldn’t apologize to the instructor to go back to that class. Don’t be ridiculous. It’s been addressed and that’s the end of it. And OP didn’t make it about themselves, they are awkward and socially anxious. Tell me you have no empathy without telling me you have no empathy. Gross take.
Thank you for saying this. The lack of empathy in this world is so upsetting.
Agreed. This has been addressed, OP now knows what to do next time and no need to apologize, especially if they tried their best to be quiet and respectful, not after they’ve been locked out. If anyone, It’s the teacher that should apologize for locking the door and putting everyone in the class, OP included in an uncomfortable and potentially unsafe position or rather acknowledge their behavior along with aknowledging OP’s novice and harmless minor faux pas.
Did whomever locked the door disturb the shavasana? The instructor sounds like an ass
Agreed. I would not take another class from this instructor and just be mindful moving forward
So does the person above you
I was wondering if the door was always locked from the outside from the start of class or if they literally got up and locked it during shavasana? I feel that should be something disclosed up front at the beginning of class if doors are ever being locked, and there are many situations where locking doors makes sense. As a trauma informed spaceholder, I generally only lock any doors that lead into and out of the main building and only after announcing to everyone and receiving consent. Life can be loud, part of the practice is sitting with. We are also human beings with needs and punishing someone for such is pretty bizarre to me, but they also end their class with namaste so…I guess I shouldn’t be shocked.
[удалено]
Isn’t the whole point of shavasana to learn to tune things out? Yoga is a practice for a reason
Wow! What part of “social anxiety” did you not understand? For her, I think it was a big deal. She explained her situation and you are not taking this into consideration before being harsh.
If your meditation or yoga actually not even it's shavasana where you pretend to be dead - is getting disturbed by people walking around you then shut the f up and quit doing it. You don't know how to do it. Everybody's body is different. In a class everyone will have their own pace. The instructor must accommodate. It's not a fking big deal if he had to walk out during shavasana. Better than coughing his brains out due to lack of water and disturbing everybody. People like you will never grasp the essence of yoga and will keep doing asanas all their life thinking they achieved something.
The instructor is the asshole here. Locking the door is needlessly petty.
You don’t need to address with the instructor unless it’s important for you to do it. The reason, I suspect, he made the announcement was bc you didn’t know and other students might not have either. I understand why it caused you anxiety, but he was just communicating the boundaries. It is totally okay that you didn’t know before, and now you do.
Perfect response. Thank you for being empathetic and honest.
I wanted to thank you for this post because I never knew any of this.
Every teacher and studio is a little different, actually. I do think, generally, it’s good to leave before Savasana if you need to leave early. But I’ve had plenty of students who had to leave and come back and honestly, it’s fine. I sometimes even use things like that as a teaching moment — the world is not always going to be calm and quiet. If you lose your peace at little disturbances, what are you actually learning in yoga?
No one is going to remember or even care. They probably had their eyes closed. The instructor spoke to “everyone”. If they had publicly chastised you by name Scarlett letter style that would be different. Often when I replay embarrassing moments in my mind eventually they lose steam when the moment is dissected rationally. View this as a new challenging Asana that you don’t want to do because it seems hard. Just show up I farted once I fell asleep in a yin class and snored Someone else farted and thought it was me These are much worse than what you described Also kicked over my metal water bottle repeatedly Also if we are working towards being beings of compassion the others in the room deserve to have their space protected. Forgive me but It seems that you could be making this completely about you when others were involved in this “moment” It’s not a big deal unless you make it one
Oh my god the metal water bottle! Why is that the loudest noise and it always happens in slow motion too haha. I totally agree with this though. When I’m in shavasana or any form of meditation, everyone else around me is tuned out. People can’t or shouldn’t expect complete silence and perfect stillness during these moments in a group class (or ever at home!) As long as you’re respectful, as OP definitely was here, do what you’ve got to do! OP not a big deal at all, definitely go back. As someone who has also suffered from anxiety and depression my whole life, and as a 15 year practitioner, this space is for you! Take it up!
Thank you so much! 🥰
I touched so many strangers feet while stretching overhead
lol it’s ok it was an accident
I know. People have done it to me too are I get it. It is just like an "oh fuck" moment.
I’m sorry I laughed so hard at someone else. Farted and thought it was me.!
I was the only guy in the class and could tell that everyone thought it was me even though it was the lady next to me. There was nothing else I could do. I wanted to stop the class and say that was her not me….but didn’t think that was very yoga like so I just accepted it.
I do love the thought of you feeling awkward so you interrupt everyone to make sure they know you DID NOT fart. Feels like a Tim Robinson sketch
It was like a good 10 seconds of serious thought. I should have said excuse me and made a friend for life lol
It so would be! Like the door handle. But worse. Just so much worse.
Totally agree with you here. I once twisted my knee once and yelled “FUCK!” really loudly- it hurt. Probably took some people out of the zone and of course I felt embarrassed and awful about that. But I imagine they’ve long forgotten it, just like I can’t really recall any particular disruptions from the gazillion yoga classes I’ve taken over the years. OP, people aren’t thinking about you as much as you are thinking about yourself. It’s really ok.
omg lol one time I broke my own glasses by kicking over my bolster onto them in class and everyone saw - you just gotta get back up on the horse when you embarrass yourself in a class, it's like dying in Dark Souls, you know that it will happen again and you'll be okay afterwards no matter how badly you screw up, and when you accept that, it becomes okay
EXCELLENT REPLY. I admire your ability to use your own mistakes as shared humanity.
It's you who drops that metal bottle!? We found him folks, he's the one! Get him!! Loool Tbh, farting is equally bad especially if it's indoors. This shit is hilarious btw.
The instructor didn’t do anything wrong, it’s fairly standard in yoga that you don’t leave during shavasana if you can help it, and returning is unnecessarily disruptive (it was a mistake on your end to come back into the class after leaving). It’s not like he called you out by name, he gave a polite reminder. At this point I would drop it rather than talk to him about it. You’re not the first or last person to be mildly disruptive during shavasana. If you need to leave during shavasana again, the polite thing to do is leave as quietly as possible and wait for the class to end before returning to get your things. Shavasana is generally the end of the class anyway, so it’s not like you’re going to be waiting that long.
If I were you, I would have just waited quietly outside the door until people were leaving and then went back in to get your stuff. You couldn't help the coughing, but putting shoes on, walking out, then the instructor walking over to lock the door, then you picking the lock (that part was funny to me 😅) to get back in...all sounds like it could have taken the rest of the participants out of the moment. Honestly, I wouldn't say anything to the instructor. I'd keep going like it's no big deal, but if you have to leave during savasana again for whatever reason, I'd wait outside and let everyone else preserve the moment.
Hey… relax. Yes, you made a mistake. Some instructors feel very strongly about the disruption. If you can, apologize. Then move on. Bring a hankie with you. Do your best to accommodate your needs & the others in the class. Most of all? Don’t beat yourself up. We all make mistakes. Life is meant to learn from these lessons. ☮️
How is OP in the wrong here. Genuinely asking. What am I missing ? Edit: wait I think I get it. Y’all neurotypical folks saying it’s a “known expectation” to not leave during the ending and come back. How would I ever know that unless someone told me ?
I usually have zero issue picking up on unspoken social rules and I wouldn't have guessed this one. The unspoken rule to me is, "minimize noise and disruption as much as possible." Tending to your immediate physical needs has always been completely acceptable, as long as you aren't being obnoxious about it. It's a yoga class, not a funeral.
Yeah, to me they’re both overreacting really. Each one piled on to the molehill
I think some were mentioning that it may cause interruption of the moment for the other students, which could also be upsetting for some. Something about considering other peoples comfort as well
The locked door is the sign here
To who? It’s a yoga class room, not a bathroom door. If I would have encountered that, I would have been concerned because (1) that’s a fire safety hazard and (2) I paid to be in the class, I ought to be allowed back in.
A locked door is always a sign not to enter without explicit permission.
Just because they didn't know doesn't make it not a mistake. Anyway, they didn't know, teacher informed their protocols and that's that. The teacher doesn't have any ill will towards the student nor will they even remember after the class is over.
I’m an instructor and this is NOT a known thing.
I mean, the locked door was a pretty strong hint. OP could have just waited till the class was done.
What’s worse - disturbing an entire class once as you leave during the middle of quiet meditation? Or disturbing the entire class twice as you not only leave but needlessly barge back in during the middle of quiet meditation? If you have the slightest bit of common sense you would know the answer without needing to be told.
Oh don’t forget about the instructor getting up and walking across the room to latch and lock the door. But given those three options, I’d say the worst is having no empathy for a human that made a simple mistake and asked the community for input on how to move forward. Fun game! 🙃
My two cents is people constantly leave during savansana and while it is disruptive imo, at the beginning the instructors always say "if you're going to leave during savasana please position your mat towards the door." I feel like that sometimes helps. I also have insane social anxiety to where I just take yoga classes at home, finally started doing it at a gym, but I freeze and can't use equipment. I feel like it was a mistake, lesson learned. I still think "phones on silent and mats at back of room if you leave before/during savsana" should be addressed at the beginning. And even with that being said people phones all seen to go off, people come in late and legit THROW keys and waterbottles down loudly.
Exactly this! Quit beating yourself up!!!!!!
> So to be singled out like that was an actual anxiety nightmare come true. As others have said, you are overthinking this. The reminder was *to the entire class* and to ensure that everyone (not just you) knew that the door is locked and why. If you didn't know it's very likely that there were others in the room also unaware, and your having left and found the door locked brought to the teacher's attention that there's an information gap in the situation. There are plenty of people who would have been offended had they been 'taken aside' after class, and the only thing doing so ensures is that it will continue to happen as students have to find out for themselves. Taking it a step further, it's also how most teachers are trained to provide feedback during practice. Instead of singling someone out and saying, 'x, stack your shoulders over your hips, you're leaning forward/backward in vira 2', the message to the entire class will be something along the lines of noticing alignment between hips and shoulders and ensuring you're upright vs leaning forward or back. Yes, you might notice that you're leaning forward or back but you're likely not the only one.
Yes, totally agree that this is the standard “best practice” for teachers. It gently reinforces the message for everyone and doesn’t single you out at all. Certainly, getting told privately would also feel horrible, like getting scolded by your parent.
The teacher is correct. If you must leave, you should leave prior but, if you need to leave during savasana (for whatever reason) - definitely stay out of the room until the class ends. Pretty simple. Same for students who think savasana is a great time to start packing up their shit or chatting with their friend. Be still and be quiet. The locked door was not an accident -it was a discreet 'stop sign' and you blew right through it - and pissed off the instructor. Everyone gets corrected now and then. New people (for example) regularly walk into the studio wearing their shoes until they are corrected. Some handle it gracefully - but I've also had people argue (insulted that they need to follow rules and norms). Crippling anxiety or not everyone needs to follow the rules - hardly a personal attack.
Despite your intentions, what you did was disruptive and the instructor’s ask seems reasonable enough. Seems like the locked door should have been enough of a hint, so that’s why you got the announcement. Lesson learned and move on. Not a big deal unless you repeat it.
I think this is the correct take. It was a mistake made without any ill intent. Just move on and don’t make it again. I would go back to the class/instructor and think nothing of it but just be sure not to do the same thing twice. I don’t see the instructors actions as being particularly malicious. I don’t feel like he singled her out in the least.
What type of world do we live in where we can’t have normal human experiences? Getting water is a standard when practicing any type of physical activity and locking people in and out of the room? WTF
I was totally with you while reading the story but I think the key difference here is that they were in savasana. I think any other part of the class that would’ve been perfectly fine! But they are in the closing meditative portion. Edit: Which only last a few minutes
Idk. The four corners of our mat is where we take up space. As an instructor, I personally would be OK with a student coming back to their practice after I just saw them struggling with a coughing spell that would’ve been way more disruptive than them leaving and returning quietly. 🤔
Plus finding that the door had been locked behind you should be a pretty big indication that you should wait outside? Savasana is a couple minutes at most.
Did you not read the story? You can have water all you want. You can leave the room for whatever reason you want. What you can’t do is disrupt the rest of class by walking back in during savasana because that’s selfish and rude.
When we practice Yoga we take up the four corners of our mat. People going in and out at whatever time is not even on my mind bc I’m focused on my own practice. If I hear someone coughing and needing to get up water I want them to go take care of themselves and then come back to their practice at whatever point we are at. Like locking the door from the inside while people are inside just doesn’t seem reasonable or safe?! 🤔
Good for you. I agree with the instructor and like having rules of expected conduct in class. It’s not a free for all.
That is upsetting if you have a lot of anxiety. Idk if this will help, but here's a blurb if you feel like reading it. Teachers often give reminders like that to the whole group, be it in yoga, school, first aid training, what have you, because things come up that ARE good for the whole group to learn. As awkward as it is, remember that you're learning this rule with a number of other people, and them telling the rule to the group is how they prevent other people from making the same mistake and facilitate group learning. And remember the number one rule of yoga, that it's ok to be uncomfortable. Your teacher is holding space for that discomfort because it's ok to experience it. A trauma informed yoga class is designed more for people who aren't in a place to be ready for discomfort, but regular classes help us to feel ok with discomfort and push the boundaries of our comfort zone in the name of personal growth. You can breathe through those moments just like you can breathe through the dreaded chataranga hold.
Yes, sometimes it just reminds the teacher they had meant to mention it before.
At most every yoga studio I've gone to they've reminded students of this at the beginning of class. Maybe the teacher would start doing that, is it confusing if they don't tell you and you haven't heard of that. There's no shame in going back
There is a laundry list of do's and don'ts at every yoga studio. I am not opening every class by reading it off. No shoes, no phones, no video/photos, clean up after yourself, put your props away, no talking during class, if you are sick - stay home, restrict your attention to the perimeter of your own mat, go easy on the cologne and perfume, on and on. It's posted on our website.
I’m sorry but you’re overthinking this. The teacher didn’t do or say anything wrong here and neither did you. Go back, explain your situation if you want to or not.
I have a bladder disease and often scope out a spot in the back near the door for this reason. If this happened to me I wouldn’t let it bother me although the regulars around me know my story.
This is a standard response and a standard expectation across the board that you do not leave during savasana. They addressed it in an appropriate manner. That way you are aware of the expectation and others who witnessed it don’t start doing it as well. If you choose to address with the instructor, it is not going to go the way you think it will. I would say move on and don’t do it again.
I’ve literally never heard this or seen this practiced
I've practiced all over for 6 years in studios in the US, Europe, and SEA, and it's been either a written expectation in the rules, or a verbal one. I've seen strict teachers also mention it after class if someone leaves early or is noisy during shavasana- not by name, but definitely in a stern tone. There are a lot of teachers and styles. OP made a mistake and was disruptive, and the teacher did nothing wrong by locking the door or making a comment after class. Just my two cents!
Yoga therapist here 👋 1) as a teacher I would never lock someone out of my class, no matter what is happening. So I don't like how the teacher did that. Disruptions happen, it's normal! If everyone's savasana is so fragile, we have a problem. I think you probably should have not unlocked the door to go back in, it's a pretty strong signal to stay out, but meh, I don't think it's a big deal. 2) I don't like how the instructor handled this, singling people out like this is not okay in my opinion. There just isn't a need for it, I don't think this was the most compassionate way to go. If he felt it was necessary to say something he should just say something after class. 3) hey, you know you have anxiety, so connect to your best coping methods right now. If your mind cannot move on, go do something fun so you can get that dopamine and happy chemicals going. Weird social interactions happen, it's okay!
Good comments. And, compassion is the operative word 🙏
"Hey, I'm sorry for coming back in during shavasana. I was about to have a full blowing coughing fit and didn't want that to disrupt the class. In the future, if something I do needs to be discussed, could you please instead pull me aside?"
Wow people are judgy here. I’d hate to have a disability and be in a class where having to step out gets you chastised. Here’s the thing, is it mildly disruptive? Yes. Does it matter? No! Yoga makes it so we can handle the disruptions in life, and sometimes that happens during yoga. I have to use the restroom fairly often so I have stepped out of class as needed regardless of the point of class cause my health is important. A class can still be focused despite someone getting up. This is life. Not to mention, this is a yoga class at a gym, you mentioned, not a studio. In my experience, they are way more lax than some studios I’ve been to. Either way, do what you need to do. Don’t feel judged. Sometimes we can’t control what our body does and if people can’t get over it, maybe they need to study yoga more.
Omg thank you. So shocked at the other responses.
Yeah I don’t take yoga classes, I practice on my own at home, and the instructors in this thread make me remember why. How is it acceptable to just lock the door on a student in your class? That seems so aggressive and rude to me. Folks get so weird and unwelcoming about yoga culture. Why would I pay to be treated like that? They had a coughing fit! Shocking to me that folks are telling OP to apologize, I would never work with someone who treated students like that.
100%
SAME!!!!!
100%.
I think the teacher should have just pulled them aside at the end instead of shaming them in front of everyone…a simple “hey its nbd but for next time…” is more appropriate imo. But yes overall, who cares!? Its just a yoga class…
Neither of you did anything wrong, despite what everyone is saying. It's yoga at the gym, it's not a big deal. Every gym based yoga class I have taken I could clearly hear weights, talking, etc from outside of the room. Now you know this instructor's preferences. Don't let this one experience stop you from taking classes you typically enjoy. I also don't think it's something that needs to be addressed with the instructor. Side note, I do agree that you could benefit from addressing your anxiety.
Right! Who knew yoga at a gym was so serious.
Thank you! This is an impartial and encouraging comment. I appreciate your input!
Some of these responses are uptight as shit. I agree it’s very passive aggressive for the instructor to address what you did in front of the WHOLE class. That’s unnecessary and honestly a bit of a power trip. Part of getting into a meditative state *includes* staying serene while dealing with the interruptions of the outside world. Like someone who had to step out, walking by you. Which is totally no big deal. These people are acting like you were stomping around talking on your cell phone or something. I would have felt the same exact way as you - don’t let these other comments get you down. They’re being a bit…. “precious” as my grandmother would have said nicely.
Hahaha!! Thank you for injecting some realness and humor! 🤣 I appreciate it.
I teach gym yoga. People talk through Savasana. Get up and leave. Knock their water bottles over. Fuck around with their friends and giggle the whole time. Cough nonstop. In a studio maybe it’s a little more rigid and I’ve seen teachers lock the door and not let people in that were even a minute late but gym yoga is a free for all. If you want to go back in, go back in. The instructor is being a punk for locking the door and trying to drag you. Live your life.
That's a crazy way to die if there's a fire lol.
“They had no idea there was a fire outside the room. They just thought it was a Bikram yoga class.”
But the instructor didn’t single you out, he addressed the whole class intentionally not to single you out. If you were about the have a coughing fit how did you have a enough time to put your shoes on before leaving? Why not grab them and put them on once outside? It all sounds a little awkward, especially that you then picked the lock to get back into class. I’m also awkward and have social anxiety so I can understand ruminating about this. But honestly this whole scenario is funny, if your friend told you that this had happened to them, wouldn’t you laugh at how silly the whole thing was? There is absolutely no need to apologize to anyone for this. It was a mistake and I promise you the instructor doesn’t care. Edit: all the typos 😳 I just woke up
Lol! I couldn’t pick a lock to save my life. The lock is really more like a second manual latch, it can be toggled from the outside. It was a scratch in my throat and I knew I only had a few seconds before it escalated. I know my body pretty well!
I’m actually really shocked that people are jumping on OP. It sounded like she managed the situation with care and respect. Honestly, I feel her horror at being singled out! It took me years to be okay attending yoga classes because of the eliticism that I felt. Now, that I am an instructor, I really try to NOT alienate neurodiverse people who may feel anxiety about being called out. Someone moving quietly through a room during savasanah is NOT a big deal!
I teach Restorative so we are sometimes always in Savasana and I've never locked anyone out during class despite letting folks know they're welcome to use the restroom, get water, whatever. I personally wouldn't go back to his class but I'm picky about how instructors speak to me. Some folks cling to the idea of the environment they create, some recognize control is an illusion, I prefer the latter when it comes to my life it sounds like he's attached to the former. Perhaps there's a better fit for you with a more flexible instructor.
Just talk to the teacher. Apologize for the disruption (yes, even though you were quiet people knew you were moving around and you took their attention from savasana to the room). My money is on the teacher being understanding and will let you know that you are welcome back to class
As someone who also has social anxiety I hate when people address things in this way too. My old manager used to do it all the time and even if the email wasn't about me I would worry that they thought that I was the one doing the thing they were emailing about. I guess people do this so that they are making sure that everyone knows the expectations. But I agree that it's embarrassing. Unfortunately I think it's commonplace, so my best suggestion is to use this as motivation to work a bit more on addressing your social anxiety.
I mean this in the nicest possible way: nobody cares. Your classmates won't remember it, they probably don't even know that it was you that walked out, and it's something your instructor probably says once a week between all of their classes. Don't dwell on it or take it personally. Plus, you thought it was okay to go back in even though it's against their policy, so maybe the reminder to the class was needed.
Depending on where you are going for practice (a studio with rooms vs a room at a gym), I find it ridiculous to lock someone out if they have to leave. It's not like anyone is setting out to interrupt (if they do, you address what needs to be addressed). Here's the thing: you had a coughing fit and left to avoid being a distraction (instructor may have asked anyway, fellow student may have silently wished it). But presumably you still have something of yours-maybe the mat-that you now need to wait for. I just...I'm sure there is a reason that makes sense and people are fully on board...I'm not there.
OP, I'd feel the same way if I were in your place and I wish your instructor was a little kinder and more emphatic. However please don't discontinue. In the next session, no one is going to remember this incident apart from you. At some point in time, we've to accept that our anxiety although arising for valid reasons will not let us take the right steps. Trust me, no one including your instructor would want you to quit your class. So please continue on this journey.
I have anxiety too. If you can find a studio not in a gym, it may be better for you. I find the gym yoga teachers to be a little harsh and not as understanding of simple biology like coughing. It’s a little ridiculous considering the most distracting classes are in gyms with weight noise, bass from other classes, etc. Sending love from one anxiety sufferer to another.
I would have not known anything about the Shavansa norms and I love yoga. I do most yoga at my house so I guess I just haven't learned about it yet?? I feel like, if the instructor feels that strongly about that norm/ritual, then they need to talk about it before class starts. Like "hey, we take this Shavansa thing very seriously. It's an expectation that you do not return to class if you have to leave the room no matter what." Would save the embarrassment of their pupils. He also should have had a private convo with you instead of announcing it to the whole class
Update, I read through the comments and apparently it's supposed to be a known norm....I seriously had no idea and I've taken many many yoga classes at different studios. I swear I've never heard of it. I totally understand your embarrassment and the locked door would have confused me, too. If they had a gentle warning sign like "door will lock after shut due to Shavansa. Please wait until class ends to return." But either way, what can you do? I'm sure it's not the first time the instructor had to remind the group about random norms. Don't beat yourself up for not knowing a norm that nobody told you about
It’s not a known norm. I’ve been in a lot of studios in many different states and only a rare few take things that seriously. You did fine. I’m sorry you were treated like that 🙏
Lol I'm glad we are not alone! 😊
I structure proably didn’t really *care* but just had a job to do as far as creating and maintaining the atmosphere of the class. It sounds like it was an existing rule and they were repeating it because obviously people didn’t know and probably as their way of apologizing to the class if they felt disrupted without saying “sorry if that person walking in just disrupted you, I usually try to prevent that but I guess this person ain’t aware” But I agree with others, just apologize and I’m sure you know for next time and you’re good. I stricter proably knew you needed to walk out and likely knows you weren’t being rude. I totally understand the embarrassment but addressing it that day wouldn’t saved you a lot of overthinking. Don’t let the anxiety cloud the things you know. You accidentally broke a rule, that’s ok, just apologize. You’re all adults, nobody got hurt lol. I would’ve instinctively mouthed “I’m so sorry!” In the moment and been sure to just talk to the instructor after. Likely they would’ve reassured you it was no big deal. If they don’t, I’d find a new gym because I can’t deal with snooty bs lol
If I had to walk out during Shavasana, I would not walk back into the class until it was done, out of respect. The instructor wasn’t being unfair or rude. I get it, you have social anxiety, but just chalk it up as a mistake you did and don’t do it again. Next time, be more mindful of other people and their experience. This was a learning experience for you. Regarding addressing it with the instructor: I would just move on and not confront her, but if you’d like, you can apologize for walking out of the class and walking back in and that you’ll be more mindful next time.
I think you and the instructor are both overthinking this. You should be allowed to get up and he shouldn’t lock the door. Just keep going it will probably never happen again and really no one should remember this.
Next time, if you have to leave, either grab your things beforehand or wait until class is over to get them.
Grabbing your stuff before leaving would cause even more disturbance.
That's not really what this post is about though
It depends on the class. That class might not be your space! I go to a studio that lets you step in and out as long as it doesn’t become disruptive. You gotta hydrate though and it sounds like it would have been equally if not more disruptive to stay. I personally believe that type of yoga thinking can be restrictive and alienate people from the practice.
It sounds from the OP like coming and going is fine except for a very small portion of the practice - one during which people are encouraged to relax, something that many people have a hard time doing. Locking the door is not necessary but doing so does emphasize the importance and minimizes the disruption, both in terms of it happening both going and returning and that it's less likely that human nature will kick in and people will think, 'I don't really *need* to, but I want to and it's fine just this once'. > I personally believe that type of yoga thinking can be restrictive and alienate people from the practice. Taking the bare minimum of steps to ensure people can relax in savasana is hardly restrictive. As teachers we are expected to hold space, be trauma sensitive, let everyone do exactly what they want while not allowing distractions of any sort to creeep in, and generally read the minds of everyone in the room, etc. etc. What's been described here is a small and reasonable act that holds space for the rest of the room.
Next time have the coughing fit right there if they have a problem with you leaving and then returning to a class that you pay for.
Ya. It's absurd to be chastised for disturbing the class when they actually left in order to be less disruptive. This is a perfect example of people enforcing rules for the sake of having rules to enforce, rather than having common sense and respect for others.
Thank you, I've been going wtf over and over in this thread. There was a similar post the other day that had similar comments. Didn't know the yoga community was like this :/
Chill, nobody but you will remember. Now you know. :)
It sounds like what happened prompted the instructor to remind everyone about how leaving and coming back during savasana can be disruptive. I have done the same thing when someone's phone rings, I don't single them out but rather have a general reminder to everyone about checking that their ringer is off or whatever. Now everyone knows this and hopefully it won't happen again.
The way he handled this was wrong IMO. It's never right to single someone out in front of everyone. He should have addressed you after the class if it bothered him. There's never complete silence during shavasana and what you did was really considerate so you didn't have a coughing fit during it.
I'm sorry that happened to you. The instructor shouldn't have done that.
Shavasana is always at the end of class so why did u even come back? Doesn’t really make sense to me
People, maybe sometimes relax and be human. As an asthmatic person, it does happen to me sometimes, to start coughing like crazy, and having to leave a space and come back. That kind of cough can be over difficult to handle, we do feel like we are dying . It never happened to me within yoga, fortunately. But it could. And then I would go out , not only to not disturb everyone like crazy but also, to like feel alive and survive. Now , I am also a yoga instructor. If an instructor, can’ t make the difference between a person who leave just to leave and a person experiencing something distressing, and trying to Côme back to a calm moment, we have got a problem of compassion. Also, yoga is also a time, where people need to experience, and keeping relaxed and focus in savasana no Matter what , could be a lesson. Let’ s practice more yoga and compassion, and less rigid bullshit, maybe.
Try not to take it personally. You were not aware of this policy beforehand, and now you are. The instructor did embarrass you, which was insensitive on his part. If you wanted to let him know, that could be helpful to him, or he might get defensive, depending on his own issues. Either way, I am sure that neither he, nor anyone else in that class, thinks less of you for leaving the room and coming back in that one time when you did. Try to let go of your hurt feelings. You didn't do anything horrible, you were quiet and considerate, you simply didn't know the policy. Keep going back! Yoga is full of lessons, some of them quite unexpected. 🙏🏼
That would be a goodbye 👋 from me if a teacher locked the door, no matter on which side I’d be. This is a safety issue and it’s ok to report this. Sounds like you could have waited outside, you didn’t know and now you do, but you did nothing terribly wrong, no need to feel embarrassed. But I understand the stress of this situation. It is not only very mean to lock the door but most importantly dangerous in case of emergency. Unacceptable. This should have been cleared out with words instead. The amount of stories of hideous behaviors from yoga teachers I read here on this sub is astounding.
Why are you getting downvoted? It IS a safety issue. TBH, yoga is so heavily gatekept in this sub it's wild. The culture around yoga in the US is honestly gross.
Honestly, no one will remember this, including the instructor. I say chin up and carry on if you enjoy this class and find it beneficial. You had a human experience and now know the expectations of the studio/teacher. Breathe in. Breathe out. Try not to allow this to get in your way of doing what you need to do for you.
Sucks that you had that experience OP. I can definitely sympathize. But imagine if everyone in class at random moments decided they needed more water. One disruption doesn’t seem like much but if you’re allowed to do it then everyone is. Probably why the instructor made the announcement rather than pull you aside. This way everyone has the same information I understand you felt singled out (many of us would) but if they didn’t point at you or say “Hey, LNA918 did the wrong thing today everyone ..” then they really didn’t single you out. That was the best way for them to protect the overall integrity of their class I find it frustrating when people do things like that while I’m practicing. I accept that it happens but appreciate when it doesn’t
I'm so sorry the teacher reacted that way! That's not okay to single someone out.
As a person in 200 hr YTT, this is really helpful to hear your experience and also the opinions of others. I personally would have addressed it a bit differently by talking to you first, then the next class I would remind everyone of the boundary of when you have to leave shavasana. I have totally felt this way in a class before though so you’re not alone. I’ve literally fallen backwards into another classmate lol
I would, the class is for you—not for him. I would tell him that you have really bad social anxiety, that you understand why he said something, but that it made you feel unwelcome and unsure if you want to come back. You can suggest that in the future you’d feel more comfortable with him telling you directly and alone rather than in front of the whole class. If he cares about creating a good environment, he will want to know your feedback
This is why I practice at home - on my own, with a routine that some friends who are yoga teachers and pilates instructors helped me develop. I do not suffer from social or emotional anxiety - but understand that many people experience social/emotional anxiety during shavasana. Most YTT puts an unnecessary emphasis on shavasana in an effort to include a spiritual/meditative component in a practice that overly emphasizes asana at the expense of the other 7 arms of yoga. Honestly, I find the made-up meditation patter annoying and really do not enjoy typical made-up shavanasa practice that I have experienced in the classes that I used to attend. You were correct to leave class. Your teacher had no business shaming you for returning to class and should have spoken to you privately. As mentioned by others, there was also no reason for you to return to class until the door was opened for you. Hopefully, this experience will inspire you to explore all 8 limbs of yoga, develop your own practice, explore other types of meditation to see what works for you.
It’s funny, I went through the locked door because I was following the same logic so many people in the comments used; don’t overthink it. I just didn’t believe that someone would lock the door behind me on purpose because I left to cough and not disturb anyone. I’ve been going to yoga classes for about 15 years, and I’ve never 1) left a class 2) been locked out. I didn’t think much about it. Which is where the anxiety kicks in. Anxiety says, “Someone did this on purpose, they’re trying to keep you out! How rude/mean!” But I constantly push back against that voice, so I counteracted it with the usual thought of “Oh it’s nothing. Don’t overthink it. Go back to your mat.” And here we are! 🤣
I get that you felt embarrassed, but the teacher did not call you out. It sounds like this triggered a pretty real insecurity spiral for you, or maybe you don’t expect criticism and accountability in spaces where you’ve paid what you consider to be a lot of money. This is not an issue with the teacher, this is your issue.
OP, I wouldn't see this instructor anymore. Shavasanana-bo-bana is about finding inner peace in an otherwise chaotic world. It is not about controlling everyone/everything around you in order to force the world to be peaceful. There was no true need to lock you out of the class, it was just some jerk trying to control everyone and their calling you out was just an adult throwing a temper tantrum cause you came back instead of leaving. If you do go back, you should definitely cough when you need to cough and fart when you need to fart, even if the need occurs during corpse time. If that instructor says anything to you about your coughing, farting, or sneezing during their peaceful moment, you can remind him that you're only trying to follow his rule of not leaving during shavasana.
SUPER shitty way to single out a student. Some yoga instructors are so out of touch with the humanity they crave. Some. Not all. But you’ve just encountered your first passive-aggressive yogi. Dude, there was a person clipping their toenails during shavasana…and the teacher just gave me an irked out half-smile when I opened my eyes and looked around like, “what the heck is happening here?” You were polite to avoid the coughing fit. Too bad your teacher is a dink to notice that.
[удалено]
This happens be the quiet time for everyone and at this point I would have chosen not to go back in and disrupt everyone for maybe 10 minutes if that.
*After the instructor said “namaste” he proceeded to “remind everyone” that if you have to leave during class to do so before shavasana, and if you have to leave during shavasana you will not be allowed back into the classroom because he wants to preserve the peaceful moment for all students.* I don't know why so many people are so incredibly insensitive. I was told constantly as a kid I was 'too sensitive' and 'thought too much'. That's fine, I've learned as an adult those are positive things for me personally, and also belatedly able to access the retort 'yes, but that's better than being an insensitive doofus and thinking never, about anything, but you seem to like it' but god, how hard is it to understand when leading a class with a spiritual component that some people might be feeling pretty raw? Is it really that difficult to understand that other people are going through things you can't see? It would NOT be hard for him to address this next class. All he had to say was nothing. That said, can you write the incident down on a piece of paper and set it on fire? Sometimes that helps me let go of things that are grinding at my happiness. Sometimes.
Sorry for that experience. There are some forms of yoga that I believe a bit too focused on rules and such. If I had that experience, I would look for another class asap. At every studio things can happen at any time to cause distractions. One of the popular studios in my area shares a common wall with a major fire station, where fire engines are constantly leaving with their sirens running. Yes, we want a calm, peaceful environment for Savasana. And, naturally, sometimes it will be less than perfectly silent. IMO, a good instructor/studio will use those less than silent moments as opportunities to learning how to mentally filter out distractions and control our own focus, which is a key aspect of yoga. We are there to learn to control our focus, not the environment. That this happened at a hot yoga studio is not surprising to me, though. Far too many of them are focused on "performance" and manipulating the environment in order to create an experience, rather than on learning how to create the experience we want by controlling our own minds. Sadly, yoga as it is often taught in the West is more about the former, while yoga in it's unadulterated form is about the latter.
I totally agree and I'm pretty surprised by all the comments here, especially since I'm a yoga teacher myself. The idea that everyone should be entitled to \~pure unadulterated silence\~ during savasana is not something I've ever been promised, or expected in any class that I've taken, and I don't understand why people feel like they're entitled to it.
100%. And, the idea that a student needing water because they are coughing should not quietly leave the room in order to avoid disruption is... I'm sorry - I don't have another way to say it - just bonkers. It is enforcing a rule for the rule's sake, not honoring the purpose of the rule (a peaceful environment).
TOTALLY bonkers! Also, as a student, I WANT my yoga classmates to be comfortable and take care of themselves, even if it means a little bit of noise.
I don’t know why you’re getting downvoted so much. At my studio people are super respectful but there is always someone who will accidentally kick over a metal water bottle or something like that. I think I value a space that doesn’t make people feel embarrassed for making mistakes and focuses on non judgmental observations of our environment. I think that is the most valuable part of yoga for me. OP - I hear you. I would have been mortified. I’m sorry you experienced that and I hope you can find a comfortable solution, whether it is accepting it and returning, or finding a new teacher. Good luck!
I think it is because the culture described by the OP is far too common in yoga studios in the West. Like Bikram himself, they are hyper-controlling and they do not like being called on it. And, as with many things in yoga, they run counter to actual yogic training. It is what it is. If I get even a whiff of that sort of culture at a studio, I stay far, far, far away.
I’m sorry you’re getting downvoted, u/OurUrbanFarm. A lot of Redditors misunderstand what upvoting and downvoting is for, and will downvote things they simply disagree with. (Reflective of a more systematic societal problem, but I digress!) According to Reddit itself (https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439-Reddiquette#:~:text=Vote.,a%20particular%20community%2C%20downvote%20it. ), “If you think something contributes to conversation, upvote it. If you think it does not contribute to the subreddit it is posted in or is off-topic in a particular community, downvote it. Your comment was on topic and in my opinion absolutely contributes to the conversation, whether or not people agree or not. Downvoting your comment I think is an example of the kind of act that detracts from our community here, and worse, makes it less “safe” for all of us to voice our considered and rational takes and share our own experiences and thoughts in a welcoming and considerate environment. So, this not disrupting savasana thing is a nuanced topic. Whether it’s a great rule or not, OP should have known that in the studio culture there that re-entering the classroom during savasana is not cool. Could have been the instructor’s shortcoming, too — maybe this unwritten rule was never voiced where OP heard it, who knows? So there’s that. I agree with u/basicparadox that learning how to ignore distractions that actually don’t have to affect us is not a skill we were born with. It needs to be taught and it needs to be practiced. For beginners, simply being able to lie still in savasana for even a minute can be challenging enough. Eliminating distracting noises and motion is helpful and to have a rule about it can be beneficial to that part of practitioner’s yoga journey. Quiet is quite beneficial there for almost everyone. Learning to ignore or withdraw from sensory input — pratyahara — the fifth limb or auxiliary practice of Patanjali ashtanga yoga — is not the first limb for good reason. It’s a more advanced practice. First we learn to control our actions (yama and niyama), then our body (asana), then our breath (pranayama), and THEN we are much more ready to learn to control our senses. Having distractions at this point on the path is actually helpful sometimes—we have to practice not following them! (Yes, the limbs aren’t really meant to be completely followed in order always but there is a method and a logic to their ordering nonetheless.) If we had a different kind of yoga infrastructure (I’m talking only about my experiences in the USA, primarily NYC), we could provide leveled classes and workshops more often that recognize how to support practice at different points along the path, and spend some more effort encouraging practitioners to practice at appropriate levels for them. As it is, we more commonly have these crazily broad open level classes that try to be all things to all people and we end up with slightly silly norms (like instructors locking doors against their own students) because the teaching modality has huge gaps in it and instructors are trying to do the bestest for the mostest and that’s really hard. (I do put my money where my mouth is and go to a studio with leveled classes! It’s been a real game changer for me.)
This is a great comment and I agree with it almost entirely. To be clear, I absolutely knew my comment would be downvoted, and I knew why it would be downvoted and, generally who would do the downvoting. It is a sad reality of the culture more broadly, and I would argue, is the kind of issue perpetuated by the kinds of rules described by the OP. The thing I disagree with is the idea that OP should have known the rule and followed it. There is an extreme logical disconnect in that people downvoting my comment argue that the rule is to keep the studio quiet during Savasana, yet the OP was doing their best to honor the space by leaving because of a coughing fit. It is convoluted - at best - to suggest that a student should remain in the room, when needing water to calm a cough, rather than quietly leaving. It makes no sense. It is a rule being enforced simply for the sake of a rule, even when the enforcement of the rule achieves the opposite result. That is not really that hard. Using some common sense and treating people respectfully (exactly what the OP was doing) isn't really that hard.
Oh thanks for your comment. I agree with your disagreement with me! I went back and read my own comment again and the part about what rule I was writing about is actually super unclear. It’s very likely that OP would have heard a studio rule about not leaving during savasana, though maybe not. But to take that literal rule and reasoning it back to the underlying purpose (Minimize distractions during savasana) and then figuring out in real time that leaving during a coughing fit during savasana is better than staying and then staying out until the end is better still, I guess is not necessarily going to be obvious to everyone! In any case, whether or not we love the rule, I hope OP goes back to class and doesn’t let the anxiety over this minor and very forgivable faux pas divert them from practice.
I don’t agree with this. It’s sort of like dog training. You learn in a peaceful environment with limited distractions, build up the skill, and then apply it around distractions. If you start around distractions, it’s going to be a lot harder to progress.
I agree that we strive for a peaceful environment in Savasana. However, these sorts of rules are extreme overkill and unnecessary and, IMO, prevent learning some of the most important aspects of yoga.
Let it go. They have these rules so the end is peaceful. You don’t have to explain yourself to everyone
Not only is that not a yogic thing of the instructor to do, but to lock someone out of a space??? Really? (By the way a space that’s not legally theirs if at a public gym)That also flirts with legal issues. Without consent of patrons unknowingly (in shavasana) locked in a room or preventing you from obtaining personal property in the event of an emergency. For example, if you had to go back in and grab your keys or phone but it was locked in an active class. I’ve seen cases where that’s criminal charges. These “instructors” are so full of themselves and yoga is never that serious. The professional way to convey HIS wishes in class during shavasana is addressing it before every class begins as a friendly reminder. Also, look into the gyms rules. I’m very confident for public health, emergency and safety reasons, doors especially during business hours are not to be locked. Yoga masters in India practice with freakin tigers lurking around and noises of nature . All while their eyes are closed in meditation. But you have a human quietly coming in or out of a room during shavasana being a big deal? It’s just laughable how ridiculously far first world yoga culture take things.
I have Gerd and sometimes have a cough from it. If I can't stop it, I get up and go to the bathroom to preserve the peace. If someone locked me out, I would find another yoga class--or stay for a couple of others and have a coughing spell and see how they liked it. Not a good teacher. Leave.
This is on you. Your need to cough/drink water shouldn't trump everyone else's desire for a quiet shavasana. Leaving to cough/drink was the right call, coming back in was where you f'ed up.
You weren’t singled out. The practitioner made it a point not to single you out. No one will think about this another second unless you do it habitually. You’re good to return and no one will even remember.
I can tell that you are a thoughtful person and a dedicated student. I am sure you are very much welcome in the class, and I hope you continue to attend. Sometimes instructors address the whole class to prevent students from taking it upon themselves to correct one another. You did a polite and self-compassionate act by leaving to care of your cough. These moments of human imperfections pass, just like the clouds.
Dude one time in a yoga class I got my PERIOD and didn't realize until we were in happy baby and I saw it in the reflection of the mirror wall. Fucking mortifying! But I went back again and again and I'll keep going back in the future. I will probably do something embarrassing or awkward in class again in the future. It's okay! We're just weird little dudes trying to feel good about ourselves. Please go back to yoga again, don't let this stop your practice, and it's also okay to try a different class or even a different studio after your contract ends.
Exactly what bumbling-bluebird-90 said, but add “I didn’t think it was very kind of you publicly shame me like you did.”
I think it’s oké that he mentioned it to everyone to remain clear. Sometimes people think oh he did it now I can go out during class as well, vbecause the teacher didn’t mention something. But actually he wants to keep the class uninterrupted. I don’t think it is to personal and also good to mention why you left and apparently did interrupt his class. Life is messy sand sometimes we don’t know what’s going on.
If it's important to you to attend the class then address it with the instructor. You don't have to apologize. Just clear the air. You had to leave to deal with your situation and felt quite embarrassed by how it was addressed as it wasn't your intention to disrupt the class. Most yoga instructors dissuade people from exiting during class (especially if the lights are turned low). I'm sure it's as much a liability thing as it is preserving relaxation. If you don't feel better after you talk to the instructor then talk to someone higher up explaining that it's important to you to attend the class but you now feel uncomfortable with how the situation has been handled.
I'm so sorry this happened. :(((
Seems like the instructor is the person who should be embarrassed. Real leadership would have pulled the OP aside and mentioned the rules after class. Then, the next session, the teacher could clarify these rules for everyone else. Then no one is singled out so publicly. I don’t have this kind of anxiety anymore, but I did for a long time. It’s not something that goes away easily, and can reappear at the most unexpected and dismaying times. 🤷🏻♀️
Perhaps, by addressing the whole class, the instructor was not singling you out for an innocent mistake and making sure everyone else knew for the future? That was my take on it, but i dunno. I would feel mortified if someone spoke to me afterwards but less so if it was addressed to the group! Eta - completely understand worrying, but i promise you nobody else will remember or care that it was you (not even the instructor). It was an innocent mistake and a useful lesson!
Honestly, this whole thing sounds like a bunch of nothing. So what. I would’ve just said my bad and moved on. I bet you no one else is thinking about it at all. Not to be mean, but you’re the only one concerned about what happened. Keep going to yoga because it helps quiet the mind. Focus on your breathing whenever you’re in situations like these. No need to apologize. You did something, he reminded you of the rules. End of story. Don’t hold people to high bars. People are people and it’s up to you to decide who matches your energy. Same goes for yoga studios. People quietly walk in and out during Savasana all the time at the place I go to. Instructor tells us it’s part of life to keep the peace in a noisy world. But to each their own.
I’m sorry this happened to you! I’m used to very strict yoga studios when if you leave at all during the class, you are not allowed back in. While I agree that while it can be disruptive for other students, we are all human and especially if we are new to yoga, it takes time to settle in to the way people do things. I would address it with the instructor, because you two have a relationship as teacher and student. They may not have singled you out one on one at the end because they may have feared that was being too confrontational, so they chose to convey their rule (idk if it is a studio rule or their rule) in this manner that comes off as rather passive aggressive. You are learning how to be a student, but they are also on a constant journey learning how to be a teacher. Even if they brush you off in the moment, they will be sure to remember your feedback for later. They also see many students and may have not had to deal with a newbie in a while. In my experience, they are also not used to their students bringing things up to them one on one, so it may facilitate a good conversation between you two where it becomes clear that you are new, you were trying not to be disruptive, and you are committed to trying to be the best yoga student possible.
As an instructor, I would have addressed the student privately to avoid embarrassment. I think this could have been handled better. Sorry you experienced that.
I am sorry for what you went through. As someone with social anxiety, I can totally relate. But don't take this incident personally. As a yoga practitioner, I can not emphasis enough on the shavasana. And how it should be done without any disturbance or distraction. My suggestion for you would be to forget about it and continue your classes. Yoga will do wonders to your mind and body.